S14.E11: Mind Your Business

[J80134]

Reba is content to keep Sutton begging for her precious love and recognition. As far as she's concerned her kids are lucky to have a brilliant, successful mother who knows best about everything and is the best at everything. 

PKs lawyer must have advised him to make a little nice & pretend he gives a crap about his kids. Don't want an angry Dorito beating them to filing or a judge thinking he totally bailed on his family.

 

[bravofan27]

Having a gun is really common in Georgia, especially an old school southern town like Augusta.

If Sutton's parent dynamic is anything like mine, my dad sort of made me a "daddy's girl" because my own mother was cold and uncaring to me. For whatever reason, my mom never bonded with me as a baby and my dad noticed it and picked up the slack. For me, my mom was grateful that my dad paid attention to me because it relieved her own guilt and I was able to get attention without burdening my mom. I don't think Reba is jealous of Sutton. I think she liked Sutton more when she was married and brought her husband with her, and now she is divorced Reba doesn't really find her very interesting. At least, with my mom, she always liked me just for my ability to bring good looking men around that she could flirt with. 

You would think therapists would be really caring and tender but it's quite the opposite. They have to deal with a lot of messed up people and horrible situations and have to be tough and not let it get to them. 

[RealHousewife]

19 minutes ago, bravofan27 said:

You would think therapists would be really caring and tender but it's quite the opposite. They have to deal with a lot of messed up people and horrible situations and have to be tough and not let it get to them. 

Are the two therapist moms on Bravo Sutton's mom and Candiace's mom? It did strike me as odd that neither of them screams mother of the year or someone you'd want to confide in. 

[Pattycake2]

I want Reba’s dog.  Boz said on wwhl a couple of weeks ago that she hadn’t had the fibroid surgery yet.  No doubt next season Kathy will be wanting a baby. 
 

 

Edited February 12 by Pattycake2

[Chit Chat]

53 minutes ago, bravofan27 said:

I don't think Reba is jealous of Sutton.

I don't either.  Garcelle shouldn't have shared her theory about it on TV.  

I'm reserving judgment on Reba because all we have is Sutton's side of the story.  That's not enough to convince me that her mom was so terrible.  It appears that her parents provided a good life for her.  Yes, some parents aren't always there emotionally for their kids, but again, maybe Sutton is overlooking the other, sometimes subtle ways her mother has shown her love. 

Reality shows have a way of making someone seem so much worse than they actually are.  I'm not a fan of airing your perceived grievances about your parents on national TV.  YMMV.  

[Cosmocrush]

Are scrambled egg sandwiches on white bread with mayo really something they eat in Georgia?  Or are they most likely something Sutton associates with happy memories of her childhood and her father?  I know I have some dishes from childhood that people would never consider trying but they are comfort food for me. 

[Mountainair]

5 minutes ago, Cosmocrush said:

Are scrambled egg sandwiches on white bread with mayo really something they eat in Georgia?  Or are they most likely something Sutton associates with happy memories of her childhood and her father?  I know I have some dishes from childhood that people would never consider trying but they are comfort food for me. 

I’m from North Carolina and haven’t watched the episode yet but I will say when me and my husband were first dating and broke as hell we would eat what he called “hobo sandwiches” for dinner often. Just like this except we added breakfast sausage. He is a yankee for the record so I don’t know its origins. 

[nexxie]

2 hours ago, J80134 said:

Reba is content to keep Sutton begging for her precious love and recognition. As far as she's concerned her kids are lucky to have a brilliant, successful mother who knows best about everything and is the best at everything. 

 

True! And, if she really has narcissistic personality disorder, Reba is loving the sadness or disappointment she brings to Sutton’s face. For people like that, it’s a delicious power trip.

Best moment of the show imo: Kyle and Garcelle wide-eyed on the stairs straining to hear like two little kids!

[Chit Chat]

3 minutes ago, nexxie said:

And, if she really has narcissistic personality disorder,

Is this the assessment by Sutton & Garcelle?  I can't remember all of their conversations about Reba.  It's easy for the producer to slant things to fit Sutton's narrative, without giving her mom the benefit of the doubt.  Again, I really don't like hearing people badmouth their parents on TV without hearing their side of the story.  

[hoodooznoodooz]

21 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

I think I understand Reba better now. Garcelle figured it out. Plus, Sutton’s father was mentally ill. Very sad. 
Don’t care about Boz’s fertility journey. I think that’s just her storyline for the season. 

Could you please tell me what Garcelle said? I missed the episode. Thank you!

[ww92]

12 hours ago, Chatty Cake said:

This episode taking place mostly in Augusta with Sutton, Garcelle and Kyle was much better. Having less Dorit is a plus. Reba didn’t seem as bad. 
I hope Avi is well compensated for all that he endures on a daily. 
Boz isn’t landing. Several housewives have pretended to want to have a baby at an older age and it’s a boring stupid storyline. Her giant boobs are always on display and she looks ridiculous most of the time.  The whole thing about Keely showing up on her Guana trip with her daughter sounded creepy (unless she knew about it and didn’t tell viewers) 

Is Erika updating a rental or does she own it? She can stop with pretending she pulled herself out of a dark loveless marriage. If she had left Tom well before the shit hit the fan she might be able to sell that. 

Ditto!

I'm not buying the Boz Wants a Baby storyline. She's 48 years old and most likely perimenopausal if not actively going through menopause. Any eggs they could retrieve at this point are already cooked.

I thought the same thing about Erika's house. Why would she spend her own money to repaint a rental? Maybe Bravo is paying and that's why only the pool house is getting redone.

1 hour ago, Pattycake2 said:

I want Reba’s dog.  Boz said on wwhl a couple of weeks ago that she hadn’t had the fibroid surgery yet.  No doubt next season Kathy will be wanting a baby. 
 

 

I'm confused. Boz hasn't had the surgery yet? Then what did they film? I thought that was during/after the surgery?

[Chit Chat]

9 minutes ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

Could you please tell me what Garcelle said?

She had a one-on-one conversation with Reba in which she proceeded to tell her that Sutton really needs to hear her say that she's proud of her and loves her.  Reba was right.  It was none of Garcelle's business.  

[RealHousewife]

4 minutes ago, ww92 said:

I'm not buying the Boz Wants a Baby storyline. She's 48 years old and most likely perimenopausal if not actively going through menopause. Any eggs they could retrieve at this point are already cooked.

As someone who would love to have kids older, I am often inspired by women who do so. It can be discouraging to hear a pregnancy is "geriatric" at just 35. But I cannot relate to women like Boz or Diana who want to change diapers at 50, especially Diana who already had a few kids. 

[ww92]

3 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

As someone who would love to have kids older, I am often inspired by women who do so. It can be discouraging to hear a pregnancy is "geriatric" at just 35. But I cannot relate to women like Boz or Diana who want to change diapers at 50, especially Diana who already had a few kids. 

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come across as insensitive. I can understand women who are in their mid to late 40's and are wanting children. But the chances of that happening for Boz are pretty slim at this point. Plus, I think this is just a storyline for her.

[RealHousewife]

1 minute ago, ww92 said:

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come across as insensitive. I can understand women who are in their mid to late 40's and are wanting children. But the chances of that happening for Boz are pretty slim at this point. Plus, I think this is just a storyline for her.

Oh no, I didn't think you were! I was just trying to explain that even someone in my shoes can't get into these storylines. 

[Mountainair]

As someone who had kids relatively young I can’t imagine being close to 50 and wanting to go through that again. I guess I forgot Boz already had a kid so I was surprised to see her on the show (I admit to not paying much attention to this show while I watch). She’s closer to being a grandma than a mom again and she should embrace that. It’s the same tired trope of HW’s being beyond child bearing years and pretending they want to be pregnant again. I don’t believe for a second that Boz actually wants to go through that- even if it is to keep a man. 
I turned 40 four months ago and have three kids- my youngest will be 9 soon. My SIL had her one and only at 41 and I’m so past that infant mentality I couldn’t imagine doing it again. 

[Straycat80]

2 hours ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

Could you please tell me what Garcelle said? I missed the episode. Thank you!

There was the part about Sutton wanting her mother to say she loved and was proud of her.  I thought it was ok for Garcelle to say that, she was being a good friend and trying to help.  
It was Garcelle’s talking head I was referring to where she said Reba was jealous of how close Sutton was to her father. I believe there was jealousy there and she was resentful. 
 

[hoodooznoodooz]

7 hours ago, Cosmocrush said:

Are scrambled egg sandwiches on white bread with mayo really something they eat in Georgia?  Or are they most likely something Sutton associates with happy memories of her childhood and her father? I know I have some dishes from childhood that people would never consider trying, but they are comfort food for me. 

Oh, my gosh! I used to eat scrambled egg sandwiches on white bread with mayonnaise! I am the daughter of Chinese immigrants, and I grew up in Bridgewater, New Jersey. I thought they were my invention. They are also delicious on toasted bread.

Edited February 13 by hoodooznoodooz

[bravofan27]

Sutton seems more narcissistic than her mother Reba. Reba may not be warm and fuzzy, and definitely is rude, but she doesn't seem to be sensitive to criticism or image driven. Plus, narcissism is driven by insecurity, and Sutton's mom does not seem insecure. Ericka actually seems the most narcissistic to me, but not in a clinical sense. Clinically narcissistic people are really messed up-- it's a mental disorder. 

https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/14-signs-of-narcissism

Sutton's heart sunglasses were super cute. 

I grew up eating fried egg sandwiches, also learned from my dad who loved them, which seem very similar to scrambled egg sandwiches. Like a hot way to eat an egg salad sandwich. It's all the same ingredients-- bread, eggs, mayo. Fried egg sandwiches are pretty much on any menu that serves breakfast. All over. Everywhere.

https://www.blueyskitchen.com/mar-vista-all-day

Boz, if the man loves you, he will tell you so.

[RealHousewife]

As much as I wish Reba were softer and showed Sutton more love, I will admit this-I can get on board with "I love you" being trite. That's not to say I have zero appreciation for hearing it. But there are people who throw it out there very freely and don't mean it. There are people who will pick you apart and think "I love you" makes it all okay. There are people who never say why they love you or are proud of you, but think simply stating they love you or are proud of you is sufficient.

I believe in the love languages, and mine is words of affirmation. You'd think "I love you" would mean a lot to me, but it doesn't, not without more to back it up. 

I bet what Sutton wants to hear is that her mother is proud of what a great job she's done raising her kids, be on her side with Christian, appreciate Sutton's heart and humor, think it's so cool she's a fan favorite on a huge reality show, get a kick that her daughter even has trademark merchandise, etc. As a mere fan of Sutton, I think she's a lovely lady with so much going for her. I bet Sutton gets a lot of positive feedback all the time, but who doesn't want to hear those things from their mother more than anyone, especially if they lost their father? 

I agree with Kyle that at Reba's age, she's not going to become another person. But Reba is still very sharp, and I think it's great Sutton still tries to work on her relationship with her while she can. 

[princelina]

5 hours ago, Chit Chat said:

Is this the assessment by Sutton & Garcelle?  I can't remember all of their conversations about Reba.  It's easy for the producer to slant things to fit Sutton's narrative, without giving her mom the benefit of the doubt.  Again, I really don't like hearing people badmouth their parents on TV without hearing their side of the story.  

Exactly - what I saw was a brusque and crochety 82 year old lady who missed the train of the self-esteem movement.  

13 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

 There are people who will pick you apart and think "I love you" makes it all okay. 

Haha that's a pretty standard plotline for RH shows! 😂

[CrinkleCutCat]

9 hours ago, Book Junkie said:

I wondered about the bolded part, myself. I had no idea Reba was in the house when Sutton's dad completed. I thought he was alone because I remember Sutton saying last season that she was supposed to see her dad when he killed himself, but something came up and she told him that she was going to be a couple of hours late or something, and then he killed himself during that time between her calling him and getting to the house. I thought Reba found him, but didn't think she was actually in the house. I guarantee you Reba has all the guilt in the world. My husband shot himself while I was asleep down the hall, and I found him when I woke up after our dog jumped on me. Rationally, I couldn't have known as he was fine and normal when we went to bed and he was never like how Sutton described her dad. But, in my vulnerable moments, I can't help but wonder if I had just woken up sooner. Grief is not rational, but it really bothered me that Sutton sounded like she was blaming her mom since she was in the house. Nobody wins at the blame game. This was a very moving, but very tough episode for me to watch.

I am so sorry you went through that. I don’t think we can overestimate the extra trauma you deal with when it is such a shocking death …it’s such a traumatic thing to deal with as the remaining family.

My ex-husband’s brother shot himself when he was only 18 years old when his mother and five siblings were all in the kitchen. He shot himself in his parent’s bedroom then managed to stagger out to the kitchen saying “mum” before collapsing. I joined the family many years later but that whole family was still badly impacted by his suicide. Back in those days there wasn’t counselling for them so they never learnt how to deal with the trauma.

It sounded to me like Sutton was blaming her mother. As you said, there’s no winner in the blame game. They are both traumatised and grieving.
 

 

Edited February 13 by CrinkleCutCat

[JohnnyU]

23 hours ago, Chatty Cake said:

Boz isn’t landing. Several housewives have pretended to want to have a baby at an older age and it’s a boring stupid storyline. Her giant boobs are always on display and she looks ridiculous most of the time

Her “outfit” at lunch was ridiculous.  Looked like she was headed to a nightclub or some cheesy music video.  I bet Dorit was horrified.

[Keywestclubkid]

6 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

As much as I wish Reba were softer and showed Sutton more love, I will admit this-I can get on board with "I love you" being trite.

but even IF you thought it was trite thats your child ... she isnt asking you to walk 10 miles or build a house she is asking you to say 3 words .. to me if you can't tell your child you love them after being asked something is wrong with the parent not the child ... 

 

and its just ODD to me that you wouldn't tell you child I love you (trite or not) .. she ISNT Bob from next door or Carrol from the supermarket or John from work she's your kid that YOU chose to bring in this world   .. its not asking for the moon right? and isnt it one your jobs as a parent to make your kid feel loved? IF they are asking then they don't feel it and thats on the parent then at that point right? ... 

Sutton is never gonna get what she wants from her mother and thats sad every child deserves to feel love from a parent NOT all of us get that 

 

Edited February 13 by Keywestclubkid
I had them them lol didn't need that 2nd them

[ZettaK]

16 hours ago, Cosmocrush said:

I was confused by Sutton's sustainable, green clothing line: 

1) Made with real leather?

2)Doesn't care where it comes from or where it's made?

3)Then it's sold in a high end Beverly Hills boutique to women who have to have it and made to feel like they are doing something good? Isn't the idea of a fashion capsule to downsize your wardrobe?

I don't get the sustainable, green part.  At least she didn't throw "fair trade" into her buzzword description. 

There is nothing sustainable, or green in her new line (now that she closed her boutique- she said she now rents space at the back of the same building). Yes, real leather, clothes made in London, or wherever, and shipped from Houston where the warehouse is. 

Edited February 13 by ZettaK

[Baltimore Betty]

11 hours ago, Mountainair said:

As someone who had kids relatively young I can’t imagine being close to 50 and wanting to go through that again. I guess I forgot Boz already had a kid so I was surprised to see her on the show (I admit to not paying much attention to this show while I watch). She’s closer to being a grandma than a mom again and she should embrace that. It’s the same tired trope of HW’s being beyond child bearing years and pretending they want to be pregnant again. I don’t believe for a second that Boz actually wants to go through that- even if it is to keep a man. 
I turned 40 four months ago and have three kids- my youngest will be 9 soon. My SIL had her one and only at 41 and I’m so past that infant mentality I couldn’t imagine doing it again. 

Can you imagine going thru child birth AND menopause at the same time, lol.

After all these years, all the different HW cities, all the lame I want a baby story lines we have endured the supposed smart, savvy Boz pulls this crap on us and we are supposed to believe her while believing her boyfriend is wanting this as well. 

Put a fork in it, it's done.

2 hours ago, JohnnyU said:

Her “outfit” at lunch was ridiculous.  Looked like she was headed to a nightclub or some cheesy music video.  I bet Dorit was horrified.

She needs a stylist pronto.

Just because you can afford designer wear does not mean you should wear what they make whenever, there is a time and place for everything. I get that might be her personal style but read the room Boz, you were invited to a lady's lunch with a Capri theme, the dreaded lycra onsie was not on the menu!

[Cosmocrush]

40 minutes ago, ZettaK said:

There is nothing sustainable, or green in her new line (now that she closed her boutique). Yes, real leather, clothes made in London, or wherever, and shipped from Houston where her warehouse is. 

That was exactly my point.

But she keep calling it her all-sustainable, green line, apparently just marketing  buzzwords in this case.  I'm not sure she knows what sustainable even means because nothing about that outfit was sustainable (or green).   And just because the company that supplies the clothes is based in London, I highly doubt the clothes are actually made in London. 

Edited February 13 by Cosmocrush

[Baltimore Betty]

38 minutes ago, Cosmocrush said:

But she keep calling it her all-sustainable, green line

Maybe she thinks she will make her clothing that green is one of the color choices. 

[JohnnyU]

1 hour ago, Baltimore Betty said:

She needs a stylist pronto.

Just because you can afford designer wear does not mean you should wear what they make whenever, there is a time and place for everything. I get that might be her personal style but read the room Boz, you were invited to a lady's lunch with a Capri theme, the dreaded lycra onsie was not on the menu!

 

[JohnnyU]

[Pi237]

The Moms I know, who grew up with cold parents, go out of their way to tell their kids they love them, are proud of them, because they remember how much it hurt to not have that kind of support. So, its odd to me when people say, well My parents were tough, so I'm tough, oh well!  I'm especially shocked at a therapist believing reinforcing parental love to a child is 'trite.'. Your parents are supposed to be your safe haven from a sometimes cruel world.  Aren't we All aware of the damage done to babies raised in orphanages who don't get held or don't get individual attention from loving caregivers?  Even if the touchy feely stuff doesnt come naturally to you, kids see & need to see you make an effort. Yes, this can be done through deeds, but kids don't equate you paying for an expensive school to hugs and playing toys with them for a few hours. Reba seems the, 'I drove you to school didn't I?!' Type.  Of course, when we're older, we recognize love through self sacrifice, but kids don't. Those are crucial developmental years where I love you's and hugs are necessary. 

She may not be as vile as I initially thought, and perhaps she felt off the hook for affection because Sutton's Dad filled that role. But it shouldnt take pulling teeth to get a simple, I love you , out of a woman trained and educated on the emotional needs of a healthy human being. 

 

I hope they've wrapped up the childhood drama portion of this series. Close that door with the I wanna baby storylines, too, Please!  New York's reboot got Really boring with all the ladies crying over who had the toughest, poorest childhood.  Snoozers.

[AnnMarie17]

13 hours ago, bravofan27 said:

I grew up eating fried egg sandwiches, also learned from my dad who loved them, which seem very similar to scrambled egg sandwiches. Like a hot way to eat an egg salad sandwich. It's all the same ingredients-- bread, eggs, mayo. Fried egg sandwiches are pretty much on any menu that serves breakfast. All over. Everywhere.

Boz, if the man loves you, he will tell you so.

1. I haven't had a fried egg sandwich in YEARS and I may have to make one tonight.  You opened a core memory here.  I use mayo in my home and not Miracle Whip, which is what we had when I was a kid.  I wonder if it'll still hit.

2. I had to pause the show when Boz was talking about how they will make plans for their marriage and "baby" while building up to the words "I love you" together.  Oh. My. God. No.  Nooooo.  In my experience, a man will tell you when he loves you...a man will show up when he wants to be with you....a man will propose to you when he wants to marry you.  Men leave very little doubt about how they feel.  This is not rocket science, men are not complicated: he's showing you who he is; believe him, Boz.  

Does anyone know if her first husband was her first real relationship?  Listening to her get it SO WRONG made me wonder if she married young and doesn't have other experience with men.  Or any friends who will tell her "ummmm, no, Boz, he's not the one."  And to see her so clear with Dorit about PJ's nonsense but unable to see the nonsense she's excusing...seems she's very immature in relationships.

Edited February 13 by AnnMarie17
Because spelling still matters.

[Straycat80]

I want a fried eggs sandwich so bad now but I can’t afford eggs! Lol! 

[Pi237]

Boz’s style is definitely not my own, but I find it entertaining.  Just when I think she’s reached full Wonka color palette, she comes out in something like that leopard rainbow number. I jsut enjoy her, and I realize her storylines this season are total duds, she’s a breath of fresh air in other ways-her colorful house and wardrobe, her hilarious reactions to the nonsense these women spew. I just know there’s a more interesting person there….where is she!?! 🤣. Maybe I’m just burnt out on the others with their carefully curated personalities and labels and hairstyles.  I can’t quit Boz and her tower of hair and crazy nails and Skittles outfits. 

[Chit Chat]

I'm giving Reba the benefit of the doubt when it comes to her relationship with Sutton.  We've only heard Sutton's side of the story, and I don't believe everything she says.  Sutton needs to quit trying so hard to please her and take things slowly in order to rebuild their relationship.  No need for Sutton's friends to confront Reba and tell her what Sutton wants.  It's no one's business except for Sutton & Reba.  Sutton needs to have that particular discussion with her mom, not outsiders.  Maybe Reba thinks things are fine.  No need to blindside her on a reality TV show.  How tacky!  Sac up, Sutton.  Talk to her yourself.

1 hour ago, Pi237 said:

Just when I think she’s reached full Wonka color palette, she comes out in something like that leopard rainbow number.

Bwah!!  Thanks for the laugh!  😁

 

[RealHousewife]

13 hours ago, Keywestclubkid said:

but even IF you thought it was trite thats your child ... she isnt asking you to walk 10 miles or build a house she is asking you to say 3 words .. to me if you can't tell your child you love them after being asked something is wrong with the parent not the child ... 

 

and its just ODD to me that you wouldn't tell you child I love you (trite or not) .. she ISNT Bob from next door or Carrol from the supermarket or John from work she's your kid that YOU chose to bring in this world   .. its not asking for the moon right? and isnt it one your jobs as a parent to make your kid feel loved? IF they are asking then they don't feel it and thats on the parent then at that point right? ... 

Sutton is never gonna get what she wants from her mother and thats sad every child deserves to feel love from a parent NOT all of us get that 

 

I don't disagree that Reba should still tell Sutton "I love you" and "I'm proud of you." I thought the rest of my post was clear I was still on Sutton's side, but if it didn't, I absolutely am. 

Even if "I love you" can get trite to me, I still think all kids should regularly be told they're loved by their parents, along with other words of affirmations. 

Edited Friday at 12:23 AM by RealHousewife

[Baltimore Betty]

Does Reba even watch the show?

The guys on Watch What Crappens call Reba Reba McEnTerror.

The problem with Sutton having all her emotions about her mother on TV, telling us that her mother is this or that, etc...when Reba realizes that she got the bitch edit it might be hard for Sutton and any sort of movement in improving their relationship.

[princelina]

58 minutes ago, Chit Chat said:

I'm giving Reba the benefit of the doubt when it comes to her relationship with Sutton.  We've only heard Sutton's side of the story, and I don't believe everything she says.  Sutton needs to quit trying so hard to please her and take things slowly in order to rebuild their relationship. 

I haven't even see Sutton try that hard to please her.  She made the crab cakes but there were lots of UGHs and heavy sighs that Reba didn't get the Very Specific ingredients; more sighs and eyball rolls when Reba had the audacity to choose her own beverage; outing her as a bad mom on her tv show.  

This will probably be an unpopular opinion, but I find it trite and childish when grown adults need others to be "proud of" them.

[Chit Chat]

1 hour ago, princelina said:

I haven't even see Sutton try that hard to please her. 

Maybe I misspoke, but it seemed like Sutton was trying so hard to make things just right (in the kitchen), that she was making herself a nervous wreck!  I didn't care for all of her eye-rolling at her mom either. 

When will Dorit finally get the message that she needs to get a lawyer and protect herself?  She looks surprised as people keep mentioning this to her.  🙄

[hoodooznoodooz]

Reba does look like she could be Reese Witherspoon’s mom.

Maybe Reba only became a mother, because John wanted children. I went to college with a young woman whose mother was a nasty piece of work. She only became a mother to two daughters to please her husband. She would bake constantly, so that the daughters would gain weight, and she would have the most attractive body. She would often tell them that she never wanted to be a mother. 

[hoodooznoodooz]

Sutton can talk about her father’s illness so calmly. 
 

 

[Stats Queen]

I feel for Sutton wanting a modicum of love and acknowledgement from her mom that she matters and that she loves her. my mom didn’t care enough to give me that. I was married to a really abusive man and my mom made fun of me with him.  When I told her I was afraid to go to sleep at night she just left the room. 
When I needed her the most, she was worse than missing in action.

When you are starving for your mom’s love, no matter your age,  it is a huge hole in your heart.

My mom’s mom had no maternal warmth but my mom wasn’t much better. If I had been lucky enough to have children they would have never questioned my love for them.

My mom has been gone for over a year and I still haven’t grieved. I think that  is because I have grieved for the last 5 years the loss of a relationship that would never happen.

I have 3 siblings  and my brother Tom (RIP) was always the favorite. I gave up a long time ago expecting anything from her (my siblings got love, just not me). She constantly put me down and diminished me. The better i did as an adult, the worse she was to me. 
She defending my ex even after I told him he was abusing me. 
At her funeral all these people, including cousins talked about what a wonderful woman she was. So apparently she was good to everyone but me.

[hoodooznoodooz]

This episode reminded me of a Tennessee Williams play.
 

They should adapt this episode into a film/film short. Then I would hope it’d win “Best Adaptation of a Cable Television Show into a documentary (or Tennessee Williams play).“

Edited Friday at 12:35 PM by hoodooznoodooz

[hoodooznoodooz]

1 hour ago, Stats Queen said:

I feel for Sutton wanting a modicum of love and acknowledgment from her mom, that she matters, and that Reba loves her. My mom didn’t care enough to give me that. I was married to a really abusive man, and my mom made fun of me with him.  When I told her that I was afraid to go to sleep at night, she just left the room. 

When I needed her the most, she was worse than missing in action.

When you are starving for your mom’s love, no matter your age, it is a huge hole in your heart.

My mom’s mom had no maternal warmth, but my mom wasn’t much better. If I had been lucky enough to have children, they would have never questioned my love for them.

My mom has been gone for over a year, and I still haven’t grieved. I think that is because I have grieved for the last five years the loss of a relationship that would never happen.

I have three siblings, and my brother Tom (RIP) was always the favorite. I gave up a long time ago expecting anything from her (my siblings got love, just not me). She constantly put me down and diminished me. The better I did as an adult, the worse she was to me. 

She defended my ex, even after I told her that he was abusing me. 

At her funeral, all these people, including cousins, talked about what a wonderful woman she was. So, apparently, she was good to everyone but me.

Oh, my goodness. This horrifies me. I am so, so sorry that you experienced this. My heart is breaking.
 

I hesitate to ask you this. You may construe it as highly offensive and presumptuous. That is the last thing I’d want to do. But I hope that understanding might help with healing. 

Ack. Here goes:

Spoiler

Is there a chance that you are the product of a passionate, intense love affair between your mom and someone whom she adored, but who broke her heart? That you are a constant reminder of that hurt? 

 

Edited Friday at 08:45 AM by hoodooznoodooz

[Keywestclubkid]

10 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

I don't disagree that Reba should still tell Sutton "I love you" and "I'm proud of you." I thought the rest of my post was clear I was still on Sutton's side, but if it didn't, I absolutely am. 

Even if "I love you" can get trite to me, I still think all kids should regularly be told they're loved by their parents, along with other words of affirmations. 

im sorry I should have worded it better ... I was directing it at Reba and not you .. 

[AnnMarie17]

7 hours ago, Stats Queen said:

I feel for Sutton wanting a modicum of love and acknowledgement from her mom that she matters and that she loves her. my mom didn’t care enough to give me that. I was married to a really abusive man and my mom made fun of me with him.  When I told her I was afraid to go to sleep at night she just left the room. 
When I needed her the most, she was worse than missing in action.

When you are starving for your mom’s love, no matter your age,  it is a huge hole in your heart.

My mom’s mom had no maternal warmth but my mom wasn’t much better. If I had been lucky enough to have children they would have never questioned my love for them.

My mom has been gone for over a year and I still haven’t grieved. I think that  is because I have grieved for the last 5 years the loss of a relationship that would never happen.

I have 3 siblings  and my brother Tom (RIP) was always the favorite. I gave up a long time ago expecting anything from her (my siblings got love, just not me). She constantly put me down and diminished me. The better i did as an adult, the worse she was to me. 
She defending my ex even after I told him he was abusing me. 
At her funeral all these people, including cousins talked about what a wonderful woman she was. So apparently she was good to everyone but me.

I am so sorry, Stats Queen.  Thank you for sharing that with us and giving us important insight into your perspective; I've not been in your shoes and I appreciate what I've learned from you today.

[Keywestclubkid]

7 hours ago, Stats Queen said:

I feel for Sutton wanting a modicum of love and acknowledgement from her mom that she matters and that she loves her. my mom didn’t care enough to give me that. I was married to a really abusive man and my mom made fun of me with him.  When I told her I was afraid to go to sleep at night she just left the room. 
When I needed her the most, she was worse than missing in action.

When you are starving for your mom’s love, no matter your age,  it is a huge hole in your heart.

My mom’s mom had no maternal warmth but my mom wasn’t much better. If I had been lucky enough to have children they would have never questioned my love for them.

My mom has been gone for over a year and I still haven’t grieved. I think that  is because I have grieved for the last 5 years the loss of a relationship that would never happen.

I have 3 siblings  and my brother Tom (RIP) was always the favorite. I gave up a long time ago expecting anything from her (my siblings got love, just not me). She constantly put me down and diminished me. The better i did as an adult, the worse she was to me. 
She defending my ex even after I told him he was abusing me. 
At her funeral all these people, including cousins talked about what a wonderful woman she was. So apparently she was good to everyone but me.

this part people don't realize how lucky they are to NOT have to beg for a parents love or affection ... it does leave mental scars that just because you can't see them doesn't mean they arnt there ... its not something you can just "get over" or "age out of" like this shit follows you into other relationships if you don't watch it ... 

 

I wish nothing but happiness and love and light to you .. you deserve it 

 

 

Edited Friday at 02:14 PM by Keywestclubkid

[bravofan27]

I don't think Sutton blames her mom for her dad's suicide, but feels like her mom should have taken better care of him-- if my dad had a fatal accident that was preventable and my mom was home, I'd probably be resentful, but also know that my mom isn't a baby-sitter. I'm sure if Reba knew he was suicidal she would have done something, but like Sutton said-- when he had to go to the hospital before (I'm guessing because he was suicidal) it was really really hard to get him in the car. Also, if he is self-medicating on alcohol, a person can go from seemingly okay to incredibly messed up and spiraling fast, especially if he was taking shots in secret, which it sounds like he was in a different room and had his bottle hidden somewhere.

Anyone go back to the basics and their childhood and make a fried egg sandwich? 

Reba and Sutton have the same funky teeth. Kind of like baby dinosaur teeth.

With sustainable clothes, I think what it means is that they are meant to last-- unlike a lot of the quick fashion places like Zara, Temu, Shein, etc., that put out tons of clothes and sell them super cheap. All that manufacturing and then waste from the poor quality discarded clothes destroys the environment. 

So Sutton's clothes are meant to be durable, last a long time, and encourage fixing, mending, patching, etc. You can see she has a cute little patch for sale as well. 

All said, some of the clothes, like the basic stuff seems like it would sustain through time in terms of style. But some of the other stuff will likely get dated fast. 

Edited Friday at 06:37 PM by bravofan27

[Cosmocrush]

17 minutes ago, bravofan27 said:

With sustainable clothes, I think what it means is that they are meant to last-- unlike a lot of the quick fashion places like Zara, Temu, Shein, etc., that put out tons of clothes and sell them super cheap. All that manufacturing and then waste from the poor quality discarded clothes destroys the environment. 

Except that's not really what sustainable means in terms of manufacturing and especially when linked to the buzzword green. 

Sutton's clothing may or may not be well made and classic styles but that is not the same as sustainable manufacturing which refers to the process, not the product.

Edited Friday at 06:55 PM by Cosmocrush

[Keywestclubkid]

Ok the website explains what it is but it’s so long winded that my eyes cross reading the buzz’s word over and rattles on .. it’s something about circular fashion so repurposing old fashion maybe? Here’s the link https://suttongreenlabel.com/pages/about-us

Oh for goodness sake.. why couldn’t they have just done something like this instead of pradding on for 3 paragraphs 

“The aim is to create a closed-loop system where clothing items are designed, produced, used, and then recycled or repurposed in a way that minimizes waste and reduces the environmental impact of the fashion industry.”

 

Edited Friday at 07:07 PM by Keywestclubkid