S11.E13: Jax Attack

[ZettaK]

Ariana invites her boyfriend, Dan on the group's upcoming trip to San Francisco. Katie is accused of spreading cheating rumours about Jax. Scheana's attempt to apologise to Sandoval goes south when he throws a past indiscretion in her face.

Edited April 24 by ZettaK

[hoodooznoodooz]

I am looking forward to this. 

[FlyingEgret]

Alli choosing to sleep in the guest room with the cats instead of with James... you go girl!

[snarts]

Scheana putting makeup on Summer Moon? You could tell from her (non) reaction that it was happens often. WTF? She's like 3. Just stop, and put damn a shirt on, so tired of seeing her in a bra EVERY SINGLE EPISODE. 

[Emmeline]

What the heck is Jax doing on this show?  I can’t stand him.

I wouldn’t take LaLa’s advice about anything, much less a relationship.  I do hope James and Ally can figure out a way to get back in the same bed.  

Sheana is full of it.  She wants to get home to put Summer to bed and in the next breath she’s talking about going to San Francisco for a few days to perform her song.  Of course Sheana had a life threatening pregnancy and never wants to be pregnant again.

Edited April 24 by Emmeline

[politichick]

33 minutes ago, snarts said:

Scheana putting makeup on Summer Moon? You could tell from her (non) reaction that it was happens often. WTF? She's like 3. Just stop, and put damn a shirt on, so tired of seeing her in a bra EVERY SINGLE EPISODE. 

Yeah, when I saw her applying fucking mascara to the girl's lashes, I was, like, What?!? That is so stupid. She'll be wearing lippie next. So stupid.

Ally and James sleeping with animals? Not a pet person, so I don't get it. And even if I were, my bed would be off limits

Edited April 24 by politichick
wrong post

[JenE4]

Jax lies about everything. But you know he’s telling the stone cold truth that he never called Lisa “superfluous” because he’s never even heard of that word. Even James had to look it up. But then Jax follows up with “I’m not a gossiper,” and all the credibility he gained with his poor vocabulary went out the window. Though, I did love how they gave him a chyron when he went to James’s house of “ex-SUR employee” as if they aren’t all ex SUR employees.

The Toms in their Mojo Dojo Casa House! 

 

[ZettaK]

Do we have to see Jax on VR too?

[b2H]

24 minutes ago, Emmeline said:

What the heck is Jax doing on this show?  I can’t stand him

Trying to generate interest in the Valley, which I won’t even start.

I appreciated Scheana going after Sandoval.  No one seems to realize that that restraining order will appear on background checks for Scheana for the foreseeable future.  That is damaging to most anything she may want to do, post-show.  Sandoval dismissing her anger about it doesn’t help his case for acceptance at all.

[politichick]

7 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Jax lies about everything. But you know he’s telling the stone cold truth that he never called Lisa “superfluous” because he’s never even heard of that word. Even James had to look it up. But then Jax follows up with “I’m not a gossiper,” and all the credibility he gained with his poor vocabulary went out the window. Though, I did love how they gave him a chyron when he went to James’s house of “ex-SUR employee” as if they aren’t all ex SUR employees.

The Toms in their Mojo Dojo Casa House! 

 

Hold on. Lisa was saying that what Jax said essentially meant that he thought she was superfluous. Not that he actually used that word. She knows it's not part of his limited vocabulary, lol.

For all of many people's complaints about Ariana, she was actually able to be in the same place as Tom last week and in this episode. She even spoke to Schwartz. Just doesn't want to interact with he whose name she refuses to speak.

Also, when the fuck is Schwartz going to start pronouncing Ariana's name properly?

Edited April 24 by politichick
to add a thought

[JenE4]

Just now, politichick said:

Hold on. Lisa was saying that what Jax said essentially meant that he thought she was superfluous. Not that he actually used that word. She knows it's not part of his limited vocabulary, lol.

Granted, the spirit of his actual comments of her not being needed equates to superfluous, but she made the dreaded mistake of insisting he used that word. Like, really, Lisa?! Lol

[Kiki777]

I liked seeing Ariana lighten up in this episode.  She had a full one-on-one with Schwartz and was actually nicer to him than he deserved.  If she really wants to piss off Sandoval, she should rekindle her friendship with Schwartz while still icing out Sandy 😂 

[politichick]

Scheana also powdered Summer's face. What the fuck?!? She is nuts.

[choclatechip45]

I don't understand why Scheana would ever want to be friends again with Sandoval.

[Marley]

Wtf why are Jax and Brittany here? Pls no.

Hey Scheana Summer Moon actually already has siblings. 

Why do Brock and Scheana need a nanny. Lmao.

[princelina]

What on earth did Brittany have done to her face?  Her mouth is in permanent frownie face!

[Bossa Nova]

13 minutes ago, princelina said:

What on earth did Brittany have done to her face?  Her mouth is in permanent frownie face!

I also noticed that about Brittany's mouth, from The Valley show. 

It turns downward now, even in repose. 

Its odd. 

[princelina]

22 minutes ago, Bossa Nova said:

I also noticed that about Brittany's mouth, from The Valley show. 

It turns downward now, even in repose. 

Its odd. 

I find it to be oddest when she's talking and it's all turned down!

[Marley]

They need to back off James. If he doesn’t feel comfortable leaving the dog then that’s fine. Of course Lala has to try to make it a big thing about herself. She’s the worst. Nobody gives a shit about her advice.

Ariana was being perfectly civil to ppl. Hopefully ppl can get off her back now. She seemed pretty happy too. Good for her.

Schwartz and Sandoval in the car was embarrassing.

How coked up was Jax at James’ house lol.

Jax prob is cheating on Brittany.

Scheana sure got over her sadness about the kid quickly to talk about her song and the Sandoval drama lol. Everything really is all about her.

Brock finally saying something to Sandoval was nice.

Oh look Ariana is there for Scheana like she always is..does dbag Lala have something to say about that?

Loving James so far this season.

Sandoval vs Scheana is tough. They both suck lol but obv Sandoval is such a joke. He really could never take any accountability he still thinks he’s such a victim too. He could’ve spun this such a different way but he’s too much of a narcissist.

The previews show Sandoval being an even bigger dbag. So over him.

Not a bad episode actually.

Edited April 24 by Marley

[hoodooznoodooz]

Please. No more Good as Gold. 

Please.

[hottesthw]

1 hour ago, choclatechip45 said:

I don't understand why Scheana would ever want to be friends again with Sandoval.

TV time. Plain and simple. 

[hoodooznoodooz]

I don’t want to do anything with my boyfriend that involves the word “drainage.”

[dancingdreamer]

It's awful  to admit,  but I had the same anxiety  leaving  my dog, that James does. We did go away, but I had anxiety. I needed updates. 

Omg Jax is so creepy  looking,  between  his  greasy hair and botoxed face, eww just so  creepy. He was on  something  before  he started drinking. Scheana  needs help, I dont  think she actually  applied any makeup  to her daughter,  I rewound  it, the mascara  didn't  touch her eyes.

 Anyway,  she's  super anxious about leaving her daughter, I don't  think she can blame Sandoval  for that. Scheana  and Brock,  need therapy. 

Katie was smiling this episode, I don't  particularly  like her, but everything  she said about Jax was true. Schwartz don't move in with Sandoval,  cute tattoo of your dogs! 

 

Eta: Someone  had a photo  on X, it was play makeup Scheana  used.

Edited April 24 by dancingdreamer

[hoodooznoodooz]

5 hours ago, snarts said:

Scheana putting makeup on Summer Moon? You could tell from her (non) reaction that it happens often. WTF? She's like 3. Just stop, and put damn a shirt on, so tired of seeing her in a bra EVERY SINGLE EPISODE. 

Early in the season, I didn’t like seeing them using brushes to apply powder to Summer’s face, but mascara?!? She’s 2.3 years old. (She was born the last week of April 2021.)
 

How long before Scheana starts insisting that they only film and photograph Summer from her “good side.”

Edited April 24 by hoodooznoodooz

[hoodooznoodooz]

I think James has every right to want to stay with Hipster. That dog HAS been through a lot. I don’t understand why they were badgering him. Ally should not complain about attending the wedding without James.

[hoodooznoodooz]

What is Scheana claiming? If Sandoval could cheat on Ariana with Rachquel, this destroyed her trust in her loved ones. She now worries that Brock would cheat on her with Lala? That seems like a stretch to me.

[hoodooznoodooz]

On 4/23/2024 at 9:25 PM, politichick said:

Also, when the fuck is Schwartz going to start pronouncing Ariana's name properly?

Honestly. And I don’t think he’s the only one. There are at least one or two other cast members who mispronounce it.
 

Ronnie also mispronounces it; he is aware, but it’s become a habit now. And when it has to do with Ronnie F- - -ing Karam, I want to say, “Maybe Ariana is mispronouncing it.”

Edited April 25 by hoodooznoodooz

[hoodooznoodooz]

It seemed to me that Jax was hounding both James and Guillermo about hosting a brunch. Guillermo tried to justify defying LVP by pointing out that the number of covers was impressive, and that they should be thrilled with how much money it was bringing in.
 

We know, for LVP, it’s all about her money. Even when her choices traumatize her staff. 

But when it comes to her ego, it’s an entirely different situation. 

[hoodooznoodooz]

The producers plane-shamed James FOUR times in this episode.

[hoodooznoodooz]

Schwartz’s tattoo stencil looked like he leaned against something.

 

 

[hoodooznoodooz]

What do we think was coursing through Jax’s veins when he impregnated Brittany?

[Chatty Cake]

I’m beyond over Sandavols whining but that doesn’t mean I want to hear Sheana whining. She’s ridiculous. She is lucky she got to capitalize on Scandoval because no way would anyone want to hear her awful songs otherwise. I’m sure the restraining order sucked but she should have been thinking about her Summer Sky or whatever stupid name the poor kid has and kept her hands to herself. The way everyone lost their shit when Tom mentioned her being the other woman was laughable. She was an adult , it’s not off limits.
What the hell is wrong with Brock not making a relationship happen with his older children? If he’s just sitting around while Sheana earns the checks then why can’t he make an effort with his kids?

If James doesn’t have a good reliable pet sitter then so what if he stays home? Lala and Sheana are lucky they have their moms around to care for their kids so they can attend all these dumb events. They need to zip their big gross inflated lips. 

[hoodooznoodooz]

13 hours ago, dancingdreamer said:

ETA: Someone had a photo on X, it was play makeup Scheana used.

So play makeup means there are no toxic ingredients or ingredients that would irritate a very young child’s skin, I think, after googling. 
 

But is the message still:

You need products to make you more attractive. 

Your appearance is extremely important.
 

I am sure that Summer has watched Scheana’s makeup routine many times. 

Will nail salons acquiesce when Scheana tells them to give Summer coffin nails at age five?

 

Edited April 24 by hoodooznoodooz

[bosawks]

It doesn't make me happy to see Jax looking both awful and miserable but it doesn't make me unhappy either....

[Kiki777]

I do judge Scheana for the affair with a married man (and do not believe that she was as innocent as she claimed) but I think what everyone was reacting to was Sandoval’s tendency to always deflect when people try to call him out on his own bad behavior- in his case, it is very annoying that he will bring things up from years past, like he keeps all these things in his back pocket to throw at people to say to imply that he is not actually a horrible person.

[snarts]

1 minute ago, Kiki777 said:

I think what everyone was reacting to was Sandoval’s tendency to always deflect when people try to call him out on his own bad behavior

EXACTLY. He never ever admits fault. Instead, he uses false equivalencies of the other persons' past behavior in an attempt to diminish/justify his actions. He's exhausting.

I hope Schwartz isn't dumb enough to move in with him. Did I hear him say that after refinancing, Tom would have a 10% interest rate and an $22k mortgage?  That's not sustainable without Bravo money.

Too much Jax & Brittany. Stay on your own show. 

[Katie W]

17 minutes ago, snarts said:

I hope Schwartz isn't dumb enough to move in with him. Did I hear him say that after refinancing, Tom would have a 10% interest rate and an $22k mortgage?  That's not sustainable without Bravo money.

I don't think that's sustainable WITH Bravo money.  That's why his whole "I made Ariana a fair offer" was such BS. He can't afford the house. He should have sold last year like Ariana said.  

[politichick]

Saw on the after show that James found a nice couple to care for Hippie so he did go to the wedding but it was a bit of a struggle for him.

[TattleTeeny]

I totally relate to James's issues about leaving the pets. I have it too, and my cats have not been through what Hippie has. 

I couldn't care less that Sheana plays with makeup with her kid. Fuck it, lots of people do that. I did when I was little and I barely wear makeup now -- somehow, despite playing with it, I never quite learned how to be adept at it (or even patient enough to allow myself to become adept at it, haha!).

Edited April 25 by TattleTeeny

[lasu]

4 hours ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

So play makeup means there are no toxic ingredients or ingredients that would irritate a very young child’s skin, I think, after googling. 

No, the make up pieces themselves are toys.  There is nothing on the mascara wand or powder puff.  

[hottesthw]

6 hours ago, Chatty Cake said:

I’m beyond over Sandavols whining but that doesn’t mean I want to hear Sheana whining. She’s ridiculous. She is lucky she got to capitalize on Scandoval because no way would anyone want to hear her awful songs otherwise. I’m sure the restraining order sucked but she should have been thinking about her Summer Sky or whatever stupid name the poor kid has and kept her hands to herself. The way everyone lost their shit when Tom mentioned her being the other woman was laughable. She was an adult , it’s not off limits.
 

I look at Sandoval and Scheana as individuals. He was 100% in the right for shutting down her nonsense and capitalizing on the drama going on in his relationship. And I for one am glad someone finally said something about it!! She was not a victim when it came to the restraining order. She assaulted someone and they reacted accordingly. She should learn to mind her business and keep her hands to herself if she is so worried about such things affecting her ability to be a mother. 
 

HE…is just ridiculous and will never change. The fact people argue with him over changing is boring. He cheated with Ariana and then cheated on Ariana. Ariana worshipped him for years and excused his narcissistic bad behavior and now she’s appalled by it. Let’s move on shall we? 

[Marley]

Jax sucks and is a piece of shit but he’s right about LVP on the show. She’s not needed lol.

[Carolina Girl]

Jax's bullshit comment "just because she's opened two or three restaurants" in his dismissal of Lisa's importance, I would remind this misogynist racist piece of shit that one of those restaurants provided his entree into reality television.  This turd owes EVERYTHING to Lisa Vanderpump.  And frankly, what has he actually accomplished.  He put his "name" on a bar someone already put together. I recall we heard just ONCE about his line of cocktail mixers (odd for a guy who everyone agrees is a crappy bartender) and some bullshit beer cheese.  

[lasu]

3 minutes ago, Marley said:

Jax sucks and is a piece of shit but he’s right about LVP on the show. She’s not needed lol.

Accurate.

 

1 minute ago, Carolina Girl said:

Jax's bullshit comment "just because she's opened two or three restaurants" in his dismissal of Lisa's importance, I would remind this misogynist racist piece of shit that one of those restaurants provided his entree into reality television.  This turd owes EVERYTHING to Lisa Vanderpump. 

Also accurate, lol.

 

2 minutes ago, Carolina Girl said:

And frankly, what has he actually accomplished.  He put his "name" on a bar someone already put together. I recall we heard just ONCE about his line of cocktail mixers (odd for a guy who everyone agrees is a crappy bartender) and some bullshit beer cheese.  

I actually think this is way smarter of Jax than what Tom & Tom did.  He's just putting his name on something without putting any money in, from what I understand.  It's just another form of a paid endorsement, he's got nothing to lose.  (Though I agree with the larger point that he's accomplished nothing.) (And yet still seems to have way more than me, lol.)

[princelina]

10 hours ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

What is Scheana claiming? If Sandoval could cheat on Ariana with Rachquel, this destroyed her trust in her loved ones. She now worries that Brock would cheat on her with Lala? That seems like a stretch to me.

I think it's more that if friends she really trusted could fool her like that, it makes her worry about her judgment in trusting others.  Remember last year she told someone (Allie?) that she'd have no problem with Raquel sharing a bed with Brock.

8 hours ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

We know, for LVP, it’s all about her money. Even when her choices traumatize her staff. 

But when it comes to her ego, it’s an entirely different situation. 

Haha she's owner of the restaurant and producer of the show - she knew exactly what was happening.  And she enjoyed it because it allowed her to do one of her favorite things - act snippy and superior to someone on camera, in a way I'm sure she thought was hilarious.  What I found hilarious, however, was Jax's "mmmhmmm, okay, whatever" attitude as he got up and walked away 😄

7 hours ago, Chatty Cake said:

What the hell is wrong with Brock not making a relationship happen with his older children? If he’s just sitting around while Sheana earns the checks then why can’t he make an effort with his kids?

I'm wondering if Brock hasn't missed the boat there - he has spent so long away that they're no longer interested in knowing him, especially if he's across the world.

[MaggieG]

I loved Lisa's "God help me" when James and Jax were looking up the word superfluous. 

4 hours ago, Kiki777 said:

I do judge Scheana for the affair with a married man (and do not believe that she was as innocent as she claimed) but I think what everyone was reacting to was Sandoval’s tendency to always deflect when people try to call him out on his own bad behavior- in his case, it is very annoying that he will bring things up from years past, like he keeps all these things in his back pocket to throw at people to say to imply that he is not actually a horrible person.

This. Scheana and Lala definitely capitalized the most on it when it really had nothing to do with either of them. It was between Ariana, Tom and Rachel. But Tom will never take any accountability in anything and will just deflect. He did it a few episodes ago with James when he brought up Kristen.

Ok, I kind of like Katie and Schwartz as friendly exes. They have good banter and their lunch scene was cute.

16 hours ago, b2H said:

Trying to generate interest in the Valley, which I won’t even start.

I appreciated Scheana going after Sandoval.  No one seems to realize that that restraining order will appear on background checks for Scheana for the foreseeable future.  That is damaging to most anything she may want to do, post-show.  Sandoval dismissing her anger about it doesn’t help his case for acceptance at all.

I was hesitant to watch because I also can't stand Jax but it's actually good. There is some great drama going on 

[lasu]

2 minutes ago, MaggieG said:

I loved Lisa's "God help me" when James and Jax were looking up the word superfluous. 

That was actually funny. 

But overall, I was very annoyed with the scene, because who believes Jax actually snuck a FILMED event at Sur past LVP.  I laughed when her manager dude pointed out they were over capacity for the event.  Obviously LVP agreed to this because it brought her money, and it annoys me that she expects me to believe otherwise.

[hoodooznoodooz]

1 hour ago, lasu said:

That was actually funny. 

But overall, I was very annoyed with the scene, because who believes Jax actually snuck a FILMED event at Sur past LVP.  I laughed when her manager dude pointed out they were over capacity for the event.  Obviously LVP agreed to this because it brought her money, and it annoys me that she expects me to believe otherwise.

For the sake of arguing, would LVP want us to know what Jax said about her on a podcast? I read a lot of podcast recaps, but I have no desire to read one that involves Jax. So it was news to me that Jax said that she was essentially a lamp. 

[JenE4]

1 hour ago, lasu said:

That was actually funny. 

But overall, I was very annoyed with the scene, because who believes Jax actually snuck a FILMED event at Sur past LVP.  I laughed when her manager dude pointed out they were over capacity for the event.  Obviously LVP agreed to this because it brought her money, and it annoys me that she expects me to believe otherwise.

I think Lisa is bitter that they’re using “her show” as a platform to spin off “Jax’s show” that she has nothing to do with. I’m assuming she’s likely pissed about him getting another show on Bravo after probably being happy he was fired from her show. She’s so superfluous that she can’t even prevent Bravo from bringing Jax back into her place of business to spin off his new show.

[lasu]

23 minutes ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

For the sake of arguing, would LVP want us to know what Jax said about her on a podcast? I read a lot of podcast recaps, but I have no desire to read one that involves Jax. So it was news to me that Jax said that she was essentially a lamp. 

If I had to guess?  I'd say Lisa doesn't actually give a flying fuck what Jax says about her (her ego is solid and isn't going to effected by anything he says), but simultaneously, she's not going to miss an opportunity to browbeat him.

If Lisa actually showed up to Sur that day with no idea Jax was filming an event there, I'd actually lose more respect for her, because that would mean she knows far less about her businesses than I ever suspected, and that her staff would book someone who talks shit about her behind her back.  It's weird - the story she's selling makes her look worse than reality, which (IMO) is that she doesn't actually care if Jax is there or not, and she is just showing up for work and to collect checks.