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Chit-Chat: What's On Your Mind Today?


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

We all have been drawn into off-topic discussions, me included. There's little that's off-topic when it comes to Chit Chat, so the only ask is that you please remember that this is the Chit Chat topic and that there's a subforum for all things health and wellness here.

If there's something you need clarification on, please keep in mind that it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; talk to them and not about what they said.
If you disagree, consider how we can express our differing opinions and still respect the other's opinion and recognize it as valid.
We're all different people, so different perspectives and points of views are natural, welcome even for growing a healthy community. What is important is that we disagree with empathy and consideration. (If need be, check out the how do we have healthy debates guidelines for more).

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8 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

sketch.jpg

Excellent rendering, but yes, the channels that the bars slide through are on the door, and the door opens inward, so…?
I guess since it's a prop, maybe for safety they made it not lock anyone out?
 

Maybe, but they were probably on a sound stage LOL.  In further thinking about it, I think the lock would not work as needed if the channels were not on the door frame. 

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5 hours ago, ABay said:

And now for something completely different...I have a question about online erotica and am hesitant to post it here. Is there a more appropriate forum on the site?

May I quote Star Wars here, "These are not the people you are looking for."

I may be wrong.

Edited by nokat
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The channels should be on the door frame or wall next to the door.  Picture a castle or medieval house with a bar across the door.  One version is a drawbar door -- instead of being a separate bar, the bar slides into the wall.  I can't find a good link, but if you search drawbar door, you might have better luck with images.

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52 minutes ago, EtheltoTillie said:

In further thinking about it, I think the lock would not work as needed if the channels were not on the door frame. 

10 minutes ago, Browncoat said:

The channels should be on the door frame or wall next to the door.  Picture a castle or medieval house with a bar across the door.  One version is a drawbar door -- instead of being a separate bar, the bar slides into the wall.  I can't find a good link, but if you search drawbar door, you might have better luck with images.

Not much luck.

I just checked a few seconds later in that scene to see if there was maybe another bar on the outside of the door, but there isn't.

It seems like this should be a long-standing joke, but I can't even find an image of her triple locking door outside of the episodes on film.

 

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6 hours ago, ABay said:

And now for something completely different...I have a question about online erotica and am hesitant to post it here. Is there a more appropriate forum on the site?

Try Reddit. They have subreddits for everything. Are you interested in reading or sharing what you wrote?

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8 hours ago, ABay said:

And now for something completely different...I have a question about online erotica and am hesitant to post it here. Is there a more appropriate forum on the site?

Do you mean fanfiction? We have a thread for that, in the Everything Else TV forum. Although the conversation is more general and doesn't go into much details about explicit stories.

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2 hours ago, oliviabenson said:

Try Reddit. They have subreddits for everything. Are you interested in reading or sharing what you wrote?

I'd say be careful about the subreddits. 

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Reddit has not helped, but maybe I'm not doing it right. I find it chaotic and most of what might be relevant subreddits are either archived or gross. Definitely not fanfiction. But, I sincerely thank you for trying to help.

What I need is a chatbot that isn't a prig. I found a story I really loved and want to find more like it. It was a sweet story! It genuinely moved me to the verge of tears. But there's no way to describe it without triggering sensitive AIs. A general web search is useless* and all the chatbots I've tried need to fan themselves and take to the fainting couch. Gemini practically clutches its pearls, ChatGPT will flash (don't...) info on screen then it disappears and there's a "this might violate our policies...", Copilot hates most of my prompts, like if it isn't fit for toddlers it can't deal, etc. I haven't actually tried Claude for this but I'm not hopeful.

Maybe there aren't any others like it. One of things I like about it is how different it is from anything else I've read and another is that it purports to be a true story and I think it actually might be. The author hasn't written anything else and it feels like real life, unlike all the other things I've seen that are clearly not true regardless of how they're tagged.

Truly, it's a sweet story,it just happens to be about things that make all the AIs I've tried reach for the smelling salts.

*Love you DuckDuckGo but please consider advanced search features.

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@ABay To clarify, you read a story somewhere--on line?--that you really liked.  You want to find similar stories written by AI?  Or rather you want to ask an AI source to generate a similar story?  And because the story has erotic elements you are getting rejected in various sources?

 

 

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38 minutes ago, ABay said:

Reddit has not helped, but maybe I'm not doing it right. I find it chaotic and most of what might be relevant subreddits are either archived or gross. Definitely not fanfiction. But, I sincerely thank you for trying to help.

What I need is a chatbot that isn't a prig. I found a story I really loved and want to find more like it. It was a sweet story! It genuinely moved me to the verge of tears. But there's no way to describe it without triggering sensitive AIs. A general web search is useless* and all the chatbots I've tried need to fan themselves and take to the fainting couch. Gemini practically clutches its pearls, ChatGPT will flash (don't...) info on screen then it disappears and there's a "this might violate our policies...", Copilot hates most of my prompts, like if it isn't fit for toddlers it can't deal, etc. I haven't actually tried Claude for this but I'm not hopeful.

Maybe there aren't any others like it. One of things I like about it is how different it is from anything else I've read and another is that it purports to be a true story and I think it actually might be. The author hasn't written anything else and it feels like real life, unlike all the other things I've seen that are clearly not true regardless of how they're tagged.

Truly, it's a sweet story,it just happens to be about things that make all the AIs I've tried reach for the smelling salts.

*Love you DuckDuckGo but please consider advanced search features.

I googled "AI erotica" and it came up with some options. But you probably did that yourself. 

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14 hours ago, ABay said:

Reddit has not helped, but maybe I'm not doing it right. I find it chaotic and most of what might be relevant subreddits are either archived or gross. Definitely not fanfiction. But, I sincerely thank you for trying to help.

What I need is a chatbot that isn't a prig. I found a story I really loved and want to find more like it. It was a sweet story! It genuinely moved me to the verge of tears. But there's no way to describe it without triggering sensitive AIs. A general web search is useless* and all the chatbots I've tried need to fan themselves and take to the fainting couch. Gemini practically clutches its pearls, ChatGPT will flash (don't...) info on screen then it disappears and there's a "this might violate our policies...", Copilot hates most of my prompts, like if it isn't fit for toddlers it can't deal, etc. I haven't actually tried Claude for this but I'm not hopeful.

Maybe there aren't any others like it. One of things I like about it is how different it is from anything else I've read and another is that it purports to be a true story and I think it actually might be. The author hasn't written anything else and it feels like real life, unlike all the other things I've seen that are clearly not true regardless of how they're tagged.

Truly, it's a sweet story,it just happens to be about things that make all the AIs I've tried reach for the smelling salts.

*Love you DuckDuckGo but please consider advanced search features.

Try r/RomanceBooks over on Reddit. It's a romance novel community, but the community is vast and knowledgeable. If you post looking for recommendations like and give the name of the story, someone on there has already read it and knows readalikes.

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We finally have a Thank You reaction emoji that doesn't look like it's sorry!

thank-you_5553885.png

The colors are too Christmassy for me, but it's a big improvement, and something I can use more often (not just when I'm crying while I thank someone, LOL).

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I have to quit looking at a package label that says three servings, and thinking I'm up to the challenge.

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16 hours ago, nokat said:

I have to quit looking at a package label that says three servings, and thinking I'm up to the challenge.

I'm not sure what that means: 

  1. The label is shaming you and the whole package is a nice meal by itself instead of just a third of it being a side?
  2. Or do you wind up not being able to eat the whole package without feeling physically uncomfortable, and/or you throw away a third of it?
  3. Or it really is a single serving and the package is bluffing.
  4. All of the above.
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8 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

I'm not sure what that means: 

  1. The label is shaming you and the whole package is a nice meal by itself instead of just a third of it being a side?
  2. Or do you wind up not being able to eat the whole package without feeling physically uncomfortable, and/or you throw away a third of it?
  3. Or it really is a single serving and the package is bluffing.
  4. All of the above.

I'd say number three.  I always like the half serving, and wonder who gets the short end of the stick.

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I'll be unapologetic for eating too many hot dogs yesterday, and then eating watermelon, leftover rotisserie chicken, and a cookie for breakfast. Then someone gave me a bag of potato chips, and I'm like, can't let those go to waste.

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This is the beginning of a self said comedy act, so bear with me.

AARP (American Association of Retired Persons) for those not in the US. They start sending you mail when you're nearing fifty.  So you ignore it for months, then years. 

I'm not really interested in your benefits. Oh, but we've seen you watching more PBS. You actually donated. I did, but I like Granchester. 

I see you are starting to crochet and watch reruns of Murder She Wrote.

What are you saying?

I saw you pick up a copy of Reader's Digest. You also make noise when you stand up.

Okay, I am old.

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5 minutes ago, nokat said:

This is the beginning of a self said comedy act, so bear with me.…
…You also make noise when you stand up.

Okay, I am old.

So, it's a "stand up" comedy act.
😉😆

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1 minute ago, shapeshifter said:

So, it's a "stand up" comedy act.
😉😆

Are you saying I should "stand up" during this?😉

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Does anyone else have experience with Ancestry DNA?  My daughter did it a few months ago and got close matches with various family members who had also done it - but then she got a close match with someone we can't place at all. 

My daughter reached out to her to see how they are related - which based on the details must be through the paternal line.  What she learned is that this person was adopted and based on location and the information she has about her birth parents there is a chance she could be related - assuming my husband's older sister had a baby and gave her up for adoption.  The thing is if this happened he was never told about it at the time (he would have only been around 10) and it has never been discussed in the family since.

So we're left wondering.  Could there be another way this woman is connected to my daughter that we haven't thought of?  Or is Ancestry DNA rife with errors? Or....? 

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3 minutes ago, Dimity said:

Does anyone else have experience with Ancestry DNA?  My daughter did it a few months ago and got close matches with various family members who had also done it - but then she got a close match with someone we can't place at all. 

My daughter reached out to her to see how they are related - which based on the details must be through the paternal line.  What she learned is that this person was adopted and based on location and the information she has about her birth parents there is a chance she could be related - assuming my husband's older sister had a baby and gave her up for adoption.  The thing is if this happened he was never told about it at the time (he would have only been around 10) and it has never been discussed in the family since.

So we're left wondering.  Could there be another way this woman is connected to my daughter that we haven't thought of?  Or is Ancestry DNA rife with errors? Or....? 

I’m acquainted with someone who did one of the DNA tests, and it showed that he had a half-brother in another State. That led to a conversation with his mother, who confirmed that he had a brother.  They’re friends - he visited him and his family.  
I haven’t personally tried one, but I would like to. 

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7 minutes ago, Anela said:

I’m acquainted with someone who did one of the DNA tests, and it showed that he had a half-brother in another State. That led to a conversation with his mother, who confirmed that he had a brother.  They’re friends - he visited him and his family.  

Interesting - this is why I am left to believe that the DNA tests are pretty accurate - which makes us all wonder "what the hell"!!  Anyway, I have a friend who was adopted and quite unintentionally found her birth father this way.  In her case the birth father's family knew he'd given up a child for adoption years before so it didn't come as a total shock.  I can just imagine though what information like this must do in some cases!

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29 minutes ago, Dimity said:

Does anyone else have experience with Ancestry DNA?  My daughter did it a few months ago and got close matches with various family members who had also done it - but then she got a close match with someone we can't place at all. 

My daughter reached out to her to see how they are related - which based on the details must be through the paternal line.  What she learned is that this person was adopted and based on location and the information she has about her birth parents there is a chance she could be related - assuming my husband's older sister had a baby and gave her up for adoption.  The thing is if this happened he was never told about it at the time (he would have only been around 10) and it has never been discussed in the family since.

So we're left wondering.  Could there be another way this woman is connected to my daughter that we haven't thought of?  Or is Ancestry DNA rife with errors? Or....? 

No one else in my family has had it done, so only really distant cousins show up on my profile.  I only had it done to find out my ethnic makeup.  I've always been told that I "look Filipina" or Vietnamese, so I wanted to see how much of me was not Chinese - or at least not Han Chinese.  Turns out it's 2% and it's a recognized Chinese minority group.  I'm over 90% southeastern Chinese but also have more central Chinese ancestry as well.  My maiden name traces back to a more northern part of the country, but it didn't show up in my genetic map.  Perhaps I just didn't inherit that part! 

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Just now, Dimity said:

Interesting - this is why I am left to believe that the DNA tests are pretty accurate - which makes us all wonder "what the hell"!!  Anyway, I have a friend who was adopted and quite unintentionally found her birth father this way.  In her case the birth father's family knew he'd given up a child for adoption years before so it didn't come as a total shock.  I can just imagine though what information like this must do in some cases!

Yeah. My son-in-law did the test, which lead to the very large, very close, extended family of cousins and steps, etc. finding out that grandma had a brief marriage as a teen and gave the baby up for adoption. The grandma was very unhappy about this information coming out. Probably old wounds?

They did meet the heretofore unknown aunt at one family gathering, but with already too many of the local family members for them to include everyone at each event, I think it was a one-time meet-up. I wonder if she was also disappointed at not being more welcomed into the family?

 

Another one of my daughter’s friends did the test and they learned their father had a previously unknown, now-adult child from a one-night stand. This caused a lot of trouble with his marriage.

 

There are a lot of reasons I think it’s worth doing, but, for now, I respect the preferences of those who don’t want me to do it because of what it might reveal. 
 

 

 

8 minutes ago, PRgal said:

No one else in my family has had it done, so only really distant cousins show up on my profile.  I only had it done to find out my ethnic makeup.  I've always been told that I "look Filipina" or Vietnamese, so I wanted to see how much of me was not Chinese - or at least not Han Chinese.  Turns out it's 2% and it's a recognized Chinese minority group.  I'm over 90% southeastern Chinese but also have more central Chinese ancestry as well.  My maiden name traces back to a more northern part of the country, but it didn't show up in my genetic map.  Perhaps I just didn't inherit that part! 

Maybe the name was acquired through adoption? Perhaps a stepfather’s name?

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1 hour ago, Dimity said:

Does anyone else have experience with Ancestry DNA?  My daughter did it a few months ago and got close matches with various family members who had also done it - but then she got a close match with someone we can't place at all. 

My daughter reached out to her to see how they are related - which based on the details must be through the paternal line.  What she learned is that this person was adopted and based on location and the information she has about her birth parents there is a chance she could be related - assuming my husband's older sister had a baby and gave her up for adoption.  The thing is if this happened he was never told about it at the time (he would have only been around 10) and it has never been discussed in the family since.

So we're left wondering.  Could there be another way this woman is connected to my daughter that we haven't thought of?  Or is Ancestry DNA rife with errors? Or....? 

I’ve done it but I didn’t get any really weird results.  It does think my first cousin is my second cousin though, I guess we don’t have enough dna markers in common?  So I think there could be some variation by degrees with cousins listed.  The most surprising thing I found out is that my great grandmother’s father may have had an illegitimate son, but these people are all long gone so I don’t even know if my great grandmother or her sisters would have known anything about this or have even casually known their half brother since they would have all lived in the same small Irish town before my great grandmother and her sisters moved to nyc and this half brother apparently moved to Australia.  

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1 hour ago, shapeshifter said:

Yeah. My son-in-law did the test, which lead to the very large, very close, extended family of cousins and steps, etc. finding out that grandma had a brief marriage as a teen and gave the baby up for adoption. The grandma was very unhappy about this information coming out. Probably old wounds?

They did meet the heretofore unknown aunt at one family gathering, but with already too many of the local family members for them to include everyone at each event, I think it was a one-time meet-up. I wonder if she was also disappointed at not being more welcomed into the family?

 

Another one of my daughter’s friends did the test and they learned their father had a previously unknown, now-adult child from a one-night stand. This caused a lot of trouble with his marriage.

 

There are a lot of reasons I think it’s worth doing, but, for now, I respect the preferences of those who don’t want me to do it because of what it might reveal. 
 

 

 

Maybe the name was acquired through adoption? Perhaps a stepfather’s name?

We aren’t sure.  If it’s the case, it would have been way, way back (we have a kinship book that documents our ancestry on my dad’s side, but unlike some families, it doesn’t go back like, 1000 years.  I think it’s just a couple of centuries?)  And don’t forget you inherit only 50% of each parent’s genes.  So I might not have inherited that particular half.  Say someone is 1/4 Japanese.  That person’s full genetic non-identical twin sibling’s results might not show that they have any Japanese ancestry at all.  Or show that they have less.  

Edited by PRgal
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I was adopted, and I did it to see if what my biological mother said about my lineage was true. It was easy to see that it was, as my bio dad was 100% Portuguese, and I came out at around 48% (the other 2% was Iberian). I actually found my bio dad's family and formed a relationship with a cousin (my bio dad was murdered when I was about 4, long story).

Mother's side is muddled, and all I know from her side is that I am Scottish and Irish (mostly). I haven't found any relatives from her side, just a lot of 3rd cousins with non Portuguese names. At this point, my bio mom is probably dead (she would be in her mid 80s if still alive), and I don't want to stress an elderly person with a "Hey remember me?" moment. It was a different time, and she might not have told anyone of my existence. I'm fine with that. 

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21 minutes ago, Salacious Kitty said:

I was adopted, and I did it to see if what my biological mother said about my lineage was true. It was easy to see that it was, as my bio dad was 100% Portuguese, and I came out at around 48% (the other 2% was Iberian). I actually found my bio dad's family and formed a relationship with a cousin (my bio dad was murdered when I was about 4, long story).

Mother's side is muddled, and all I know from her side is that I am Scottish and Irish (mostly). I haven't found any relatives from her side, just a lot of 3rd cousins with non Portuguese names. At this point, my bio mom is probably dead (she would be in her mid 80s if still alive), and I don't want to stress an elderly person with a "Hey remember me?" moment. It was a different time, and she might not have told anyone of my existence. I'm fine with that. 

My son is donor-conceived on both sides, and as far as we know, he's Chinese on one side and a mix of various ethnic groups that settled in the eastern part of Canada on the other (so basically English, Scottish, Irish and possibly a bit of French).  There might be some Indigenous ancestry as well.  I'm sure he'd love to know.  Too young to properly understand right now, so I won't ask if he's interested until he's at least 10.

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1 hour ago, partofme said:

It does think my first cousin is my second cousin though,

In my case, 23 and Me lists my first cousin, once removed, as my first cousin. I know her very well, but it was cool to see her pop up as a relative. I haven't had anything strange pop up, and mostly all of the related people are cousins from way, way back. A few of my cousins' children (my 1st cousins, once removed), have shown up as related people. I did correspond briefly with the daughter of my mom's first cousin. It was interesting b/c apparently this cousin moved to Florida in the late 50s. I remember his mom, who was my grandmother's younger sister. My grandma was the 2nd oldest of 7 and so my mom had LOTS of cousins. Well, this particular cousin remembered my grandma and she got very excited when I started naming names as my mom's family would give weird nicknames to the kids. For example: there were cousins named Chickie, Googie, etc. Well, this cousin shared photos with me of her dad and of her grandma , my great aunt, on her wedding day. Our correspondence was bittersweet for her, as her parents were gone, and she told me she would have wanted to share this information with him. 

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28 minutes ago, Salacious Kitty said:

At this point, my bio mom is probably dead (she would be in her mid 80s if still alive), and I don't want to stress an elderly person with a "Hey remember me?" moment. It was a different time, and she might not have told anyone of my existence. I'm fine with that. 

This is where we are with regard to my sister-in-law.  If she did in fact give up a child for adoption she did it at a time when she must have expected it would never be found out and she has spent all the years since then never talking about it - well as far as we know. 

We've decided not to say anything but an interesting development has been that adoption records where all this took place have now been opened.  So if the woman my daughter has been matched with so desires apparently she can ask the govt for information about her birth parents that would identify them.

I am really torn on this - I totally understand how a child would want to know about their biological parents, but on the other hand, a woman giving up a child 30 or more years ago in the expectation that no one would ever know....wow.  I can only imagine how they might feel.

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4 hours ago, Dimity said:

So we're left wondering.  Could there be another way this woman is connected to my daughter that we haven't thought of?  Or is Ancestry DNA rife with errors? Or....? 

So I did Ancestry, and got the usual answers. I keep getting notices of people related. I have heard of errors, and also heard about family finding someone the didn't know about. I found out I have a half sister who I thought was a cousin.

Yes, this is a difficult subject.

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5 hours ago, Dimity said:

Does anyone else have experience with Ancestry DNA?  My daughter did it a few months ago and got close matches with various family members who had also done it - but then she got a close match with someone we can't place at all. 

My daughter reached out to her to see how they are related - which based on the details must be through the paternal line.  What she learned is that this person was adopted and based on location and the information she has about her birth parents there is a chance she could be related - assuming my husband's older sister had a baby and gave her up for adoption.  The thing is if this happened he was never told about it at the time (he would have only been around 10) and it has never been discussed in the family since.

So we're left wondering.  Could there be another way this woman is connected to my daughter that we haven't thought of?  Or is Ancestry DNA rife with errors? Or....? 

We did Ancestry early this year. I didn't expect or get any surprises, but my my MIL was born out of wedlock and raised by her birth mother, very unusual in 1922. The family were always told that they were mostly Bohemian (Czech) on both sides, but come to find out my husband has a fair amount of Scottish, Danish...and something else, maybe Irish? I'm not at home right now, so I can't check. It must have come from his maternal grandfather, who probably never knew he had a daughter. He may not have had any other children because no aunts or uncles have shown up. I find the app kind of annoying. They're always trying to get you to pay for a longer term of service. And they're always emailing me about a new hint about my grandparents that turns out to be old news I'm already aware of. 

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My mom was adopted in 1960 as an infant, closed adoption. She did the 23 and me when her adoptive parents (my grandparents) gifted it to her a few years back. Otherwise she had no interest in finding out about her birth parents. She found out that she had a few half siblings. One of the half siblings happened to do the same test and reached out to my mom around the same time. They struck up an email chat for a bit and my mom found out more about her birth family but as far as I know they have not kept in touch. My mom was born and raised in Alaska so it was neat to find out that her ancestry is mostly located in Spain and the coastal regions around there. She is not part Eskimo as 5 year old me always assumed. 

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45 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

I did the ancestry test and all I found is a bunch of relatives in Canada. 

No half siblings no nothing.

I'd be happy to find relatives in Canada. 

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I have no interest whatsoever in doing one of these kits.  I object to paying a private company to know and potentially misuse my DNA.  Also, as some of the stories above illustrate, some harmful personal history is being revealed.

Just me?

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42 minutes ago, Ancaster said:

I have no interest whatsoever in doing one of these kits.  I object to paying a private company to know and potentially misuse my DNA.  Also, as some of the stories above illustrate, some harmful personal history is being revealed.

Just me?

It's not just you.  Of course they're monetizing this in ways beyond paying for the kits. Me being a bit naive hopes some of this is going to research to help people.

To clarify, I did the health version of 23andme first. 

Edited by nokat
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3 hours ago, Ancaster said:

I have no interest whatsoever in doing one of these kits.  I object to paying a private company to know and potentially misuse my DNA.  Also, as some of the stories above illustrate, some harmful personal history is being revealed.

Just me?

I felt that way for a long time. Once my sister did it, I just thought what the heck? Our info was already out there! We received the kits for Christmas and decided to go for it. The results haven't been too exciting. I was mostly interested in geographical history. I have a lot of relatives, but I already knew that before the test! 

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(edited)
6 hours ago, Ancaster said:

I have no interest whatsoever in doing one of these kits.  I object to paying a private company to know and potentially misuse my DNA.  Also, as some of the stories above illustrate, some harmful personal history is being revealed.

Just me?

5 hours ago, nokat said:

It's not just you.  Of course they're monetizing this in ways beyond paying for the kits. Me being a bit naive hopes some of this is going to research to help people.

To clarify, I did the health version of 23andme first. 

My son-in-law did the most thorough health information DNA analysis money can buy, which wound up exposing his Grandma's teen pregnancy.
The irony is that my daughter admires how her husband and his family don't gossip or really talk at all about people. 
Knowing the story about her husband's grandma's hidden teen pregnancy and childbirth does not seem to have diminished her squashing any talk about anyone; even my musings about a neighbor's mustard-colored house are off limits. 
But I still sometimes teasingly remark as we drive or stroll past: There's Colonel Mustard's house!

However, if my son-in-law had done the genetic testing through a doctor's office or, for example, the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson's Research (both are free, BTW), his Grandma's teen pregnancy would not have been revealed.

[Edited to remove health-topic stuff]

Edited by shapeshifter
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Several members of my family have been interested in genealogy for decades, and have done the shoe-leather work of finding our ancestors and their origins, poring over courthouse and cemetery records.  So we have a pretty good idea of the family tree on one side.  The other side hit a dead end (so to speak) when the trail led to a place where all the records prior to the Civil War were destroyed during the Civil War.

All that to say, I did do Ancestry, just to see how it compared to the information I already knew.  It was close, but because certain ethnic groups (particularly Native Americans) do not participate, or participate in low numbers, those did not show up.  There weren't any surprises, either.

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(edited)
9 hours ago, Ancaster said:

Also, as some of the stories above illustrate, some harmful personal history is being revealed.

This is where I am concerned about consequences as well.  That said, as I mentioned in an earlier post, adoption records are becoming easier and easier to access. So, even if there were no such thing as DNA testing being made so available, secrets may still come out.

Edited by Dimity
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I knew a lady whose niece took the dna test with her entire extended family. She was an only child… 

DNA test revealed her dad wasn’t her dad and her mom refused to say who her biological father was. Her aunt ( my friend) figured it out. The biological dad was the moms best friends husband!

Sadly the biological father, his wife and their 3 kids are all dead. All 3 kids died by 30. She had to test her bio dads sister. Yep he was the pappy! Her mom kept insisting her husband was the dad when he wasn’t. 
 

like I said my own dna test revealed nothing interesting!

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59 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

DNA test revealed her dad wasn’t her dad and her mom refused to say who her biological father was. Her aunt ( my friend) figured it out. The biological dad was the moms best friends husband!

 

I don't know the details of your friends situation but to be honest I find this to be very intrusive.  In our family situation we are fairly sure we've uncovered something about my husband's sister that she has never made known and we feel we need to respect her right to privacy.

Edited by Dimity
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13 hours ago, Ancaster said:

I have no interest whatsoever in doing one of these kits.  I object to paying a private company to know and potentially misuse my DNA.  Also, as some of the stories above illustrate, some harmful personal history is being revealed.

Just me?

I'm the same. I would be vary of sharing my DNA, there is already way too much personal information we are required to provide to be able to function on the internet. 

I also wouldn't see people I have only a biological connection with and never met as family. The only positive I can see is getting more information about possible genetically transmitted diseases. Similarly, if I found out I had ancestors from another country, it wouldn't make a difference to me regarding my identity, because my culture is the stuff I grew up with, not my genetics.

But, different strokes for different folks...

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On 7/3/2024 at 1:18 AM, ABay said:

Reddit has not helped, but maybe I'm not doing it right. I find it chaotic and most of what might be relevant subreddits are either archived or gross. Definitely not fanfiction. But, I sincerely thank you for trying to help.

What I need is a chatbot that isn't a prig. I found a story I really loved and want to find more like it. It was a sweet story! It genuinely moved me to the verge of tears. But there's no way to describe it without triggering sensitive AIs. A general web search is useless* and all the chatbots I've tried need to fan themselves and take to the fainting couch. Gemini practically clutches its pearls, ChatGPT will flash (don't...) info on screen then it disappears and there's a "this might violate our policies...", Copilot hates most of my prompts, like if it isn't fit for toddlers it can't deal, etc. I haven't actually tried Claude for this but I'm not hopeful.

Maybe there aren't any others like it. One of things I like about it is how different it is from anything else I've read and another is that it purports to be a true story and I think it actually might be. The author hasn't written anything else and it feels like real life, unlike all the other things I've seen that are clearly not true regardless of how they're tagged.

Truly, it's a sweet story,it just happens to be about things that make all the AIs I've tried reach for the smelling salts.

*Love you DuckDuckGo but please consider advanced search features.

 

I don't want to sound like on an anti-AI tangent, but... what makes art work is the human element. AI will never produce honest art. It might produce something workable but that is just because it copies what humans produced and maybe putting some good parts together works once in a while. But it is the art we produce from our emotions and experiences and mess that is the good, honest stuff. 

Have you tried AO3? It is the biggest online archive and it also has original works in case you are not looking for a particular fandom. And I promise you, there are people posting who do not blush at anything. I don't think anything is off-limits there, as the idea behind it was to store all stories, including those that other websites rejected. (Honestly, there is stuff that I find problematic, but the reasoning that people always use it that once you start censoring something, it will just lead to more censorship). And once you understand the tag system, it is pretty workable to find what you want to find and not see what you don't want to see.

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30 minutes ago, JustHereForFood said:

I'm the same. I would be vary of sharing my DNA, there is already way too much personal information we are required to provide to be able to function on the internet. 

I also wouldn't see people I have only a biological connection with and never met as family. The only positive I can see is getting more information about possible genetically transmitted diseases. Similarly, if I found out I had ancestors from another country, it wouldn't make a difference to me regarding my identity, because my culture is the stuff I grew up with, not my genetics.

But, different strokes for different folks...

Knowing about their ethnicity and possible genetic relatives can be important to those who were adopted or donor-conceived. Especially if said donor-conceived child has little information on their donors.  For me, I have my father's kinship book, so I know my direct line there.  My son?  He doesn't have anything of that sort.  Even though my dad's book only goes back a couple of hundred years or so (rather than a few thousand, like some families), it's good to know.  If my son were interested, he might want to know about his line (he is donor conceived on both sides, with the sperm side being Chinese.  Wouldn't it be interesting if he, too, came from a line of scholars who worked for the Imperial Palace?  Though we wouldn't know that unless we contacted the male side of the genetic family).  

ETA:  separately, I also had a medical genetics test done to see which medications are easier for me to tolerate as well as any genetic conditions (other than my neurofibromatosis, which is already known) I have, including risks for certain cancers and dementia.  Results?  Pretty boring.  

Edited by PRgal
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I'll be honest here (hopefully this is not off-limits chat), the idea of having my 100% Jewish ancestry available on line now and in the future terrifies me. Who knows what government will be in power down the line and what use they may make of this information?

After I converted to Christianity my dad said: "When Hitler comes again, he won't care that you converted", and I laughed...now I wouldn't laugh because although I don't expect Hitler, with what I see out in the streets of our major cities around the world, I expect someone new with the same old trope. 😿

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