S02.E07: A Family Affair

[JTMacc99]

Shaina’s comments spark a conversation between Shayne and Natalie. Later, the couples connect with more sweet — and skeptical — friends and family.

[NeenerNeener]

So it looks like Shaina's Hail Mary pass at Shayne at the party didn't work.

I still think Natalie and Shayne aren't a good fit, but kudos to Shayne for not bailing on her when Shaina gave him the option.

[Fallacy]

Shaina is not a good person, and I think she looks around 40, not 31. I was so glad to see how deeply disgusted Shayne was by her behavior. And while the camera tried to make it out like Natalie was staring at them talking the whole time, I think Natalie accepted that Shayne had to film that scene for the show and had enough confidence in her relationship to not worry about it too much. Why am I rooting for them, I don’t know, but Shayne has won me over. 
 

[NetflixandChill]

I'm in love with Shake's mom and her telling him how amazing Deepti is and that she doesn't deserve someone giving her even half a percent less. Put him in his place, mama!

[SoapDoc]

26 minutes ago, NetflixandChill said:

I'm in love with Shake's mom and her telling him how amazing Deepti is and that she doesn't deserve someone giving her even half a percent less. Put him in his place, mama!

Exactly what I said!

I am assuming he is trying to work on it.  I don't understand the game plan on his part. And they do seem to get along smashingly. I feel like hr's going to marry her com hell or high water.

Why is Shane going to meet her parents looking like a vagabond?

[Hpmec]

Shayne apparently has no clue how to dress when meeting a significant other's parents for the first time. I'm surprised Natalie didn't say something. I would have. 

Nick wasn't kidding when he said his mother wasn't the warm and welcoming type. Huge red flag. When someone isn't willing to put on a smile and at least try to be friendly when cameras are rolling, imagine the frostbite in real life. Run Danielle! 

Hope Shaina is gone for good. She seems like the type who'd give Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction a run for the money. Watch the stove for a boiling bunny, Natalie. 

Shake, if you're not into a beautiful, smart woman like Deeps, many others would gladly take your place. Let her know before it's too late. She's way too good for you. You're not the shit you think you are. 

Looking forward to seeing where this massive shitshow is headed. 

[Empress1]

I love Jarrette's parents. (His stepmom is wearing a little too much hair but I still love her.) But how did he not explain to them how the show works? How did he explain the cameras? Natalie did the same thing. 

Also, do those gold cups sponsor the show? Did Jarrette bring one with him to his parents' house? (Where is his mom? His stepmom has clearly been in his life since Jarette was little since she said they'd been together 25 years.)

Shake's place is gorgeous. It's a bachelor pad but the views and the balcony are great. And I might need a heated mattress pad (in Chicago, that's a great idea).

1 hour ago, Hpmec said:

Nick wasn't kidding when he said his mother wasn't the warm and welcoming type. Huge red flag. When someone isn't willing to put on a smile and at least try to be friendly when cameras are rolling, imagine the frostbite in real life.

There was a point where she rolled her eyes about something. She seems very dour. All three of them did. Although I did think "Don't talk about terrible times when you've only known each other two weeks!" and then his mom said it. I also thought "Nobody WANTS to get divorced," and then she said that too.

Why didn't Iyanna go out with Jarrette?

2 hours ago, Hpmec said:

Shayne apparently has no clue how to dress when meeting a significant other's parents for the first time. I'm surprised Natalie didn't say something. I would have. 

Me too. Holes in the knees is not a meet the parents look.

[Irlandesa]

6 hours ago, SoapDoc said:

I am assuming he is trying to work on it.  I don't understand the game plan on his part. And they do seem to get along smashingly. I feel like hr's going to marry her com hell or high water.

In this episode, there were two parents who I think would be devastated by "nos."  There's Jarrette whose father is officiating his first wedding.  And then there's Shake.  If he says no at the altar...I'd worry about what his mom would do to him. But not really. He'd deserve it.

His parents house is gorgeous.  His apartment was nice too. I was surprised he seemed to be recognizing that he might have been trying to fit in with his dating choices in the past. 

I think Shayne handled Shaina really well and I had to laugh when they were talking about alcohol at the wedding.  Her family didn't drink and he said that's all they do in Wisconsin.  I grew up there and I knew I pegged him. 

I can't get a read on Sal and Mallory.  Part of me thinks they've already made a plan to say "no" to one another at the altar but potentially keep dating.  I did roll my eyes at Sal's 2.5 year relationship not being considered very long.  Maybe in a lifetime but he's only 31.

Nick's dog really likes Danielle.

[Court]

9 hours ago, Fallacy said:

Shaina is not a good person, and I think she looks around 40, not 31. I was so glad to see how deeply disgusted Shayne was by her behavior. And while the camera tried to make it out like Natalie was staring at them talking the whole time, I think Natalie accepted that Shayne had to film that scene for the show and had enough confidence in her relationship to not worry about it too much. Why am I rooting for them, I don’t know, but Shayne has won me over. 
 

Yes! I was thinking that he's really grown on me. Like he's actually really self aware and not a terrible guy. I also want to see them make it to spite Shaina.

I don't think Jarrete and Iyanna will make it. I'm not sure Nick and Danielle will. I know she has insecurities and isn't afraid to share those but she simply keeps trying to ruin it. 

Shane's mom is the best ever. 

[Zuleikha]

The show's editing in the Mexico segments was really odd. Shayne and Natalie clearly have real feelings for each other. They're actually quiet sweet, and I will be sad if they don't end up married. 

I also thought it was interesting that part of why Shayne wanted to talk to Shaina at the beach party was to confront her about shit stirring in his relationship. She misread so much, and it was just weird! Like she was actually right about how the show portrayed her in the pod episodes, but then thinking she was some kind of villain in his relationship? She wishes she was that significant! 

I do feel for her with Kyle. I think she felt pressured by the situation and said yes, but she knew right away it was a mistake. I don't know that she truly led Kyle on as he seemed to think. She was clear even when they first met that she was very concerned about the religion. I thought Kyle was also very rude about Shaina's faith. He claimed he was going to compromise, but he also came across as having no respect for her faith or the role of faith in her family's life. I don't think he understood what a compromise would look like.

I don't understand Shake's issue with not feeling an animalistic attraction for Deepti. That type of attraction doesn't usually last through the years of a long marriage... it's new relationship energy. Maybe it's just not there for him, but he doesn't seem like he's trying to build it.

Nick's family is something else. I felt like I got such great insight into him and why he connected with Danielle. They are both very damaged people, and it is easy to see why. Sometimes two damaged people can heal each other; often not. Even though Nick shit stirs, and Danielle actively sabotages, I'm rooting for them. 

Sal and Mallory seem solid. Iyanna and Jarrett seem like they may be rockier. I'm not sure Iyanna's as into Jarrett in real life where she has to share him with friends as she was in the pods, where she didn't. Jarrett's life also looks difficult to blend with having a normal 9-5 job, though.

[Racj82]

5 hours ago, Zuleikha said:

I do feel for her with Kyle. I think she felt pressured by the situation and said yes, but she knew right away it was a mistake. I don't know that she truly led Kyle on as he seemed to think. She was clear even when they first met that she was very concerned about the religion. I thought Kyle was also very rude about Shaina's faith. He claimed he was going to compromise, but he also came across as having no respect for her faith or the role of faith in her family's life. I don't think he understood what a compromise would look like.

Accepting the proposal was leading him on no matter how you look at it. And no one can say he wasn't willing to work on it in terms of religion because he said he would and they barely spent time together to even work on anything because of her. 

[Zuleikha]

3 hours ago, Racj82 said:

Accepting the proposal was leading him on no matter how you look at it. And no one can say he wasn't willing to work on it in terms of religion because he said he would and they barely spent time together to even work on anything because of her. 

No, I do look at it in a way in which it is not leading him on. Kyle knows the rules of both show and life; he knows that proposals don't always equal marriage (in life as well). She was upfront when they first met about her concerns, and she left the first night in Mexico. He had no reason to be confused that Shaina had a lot of doubts--way too many to be talking about going through with a marriage in two weeks. 

I saw how he was with her family, and during the conversations when she tried to talk to him about her faith. To me, he came across as glib and dismissive--like he didn't really believe that she believed in Jesus. He acted like he thought being okay with her saying grace at meals and taking the kids to church was all that's involved. He was talking about moving in together after that disaster of a meeting with her family without a real conversation about how she felt.

[Empress1]

Between their faith and one of the members of Shaina's family asking if Kyle liked being an American, I was getting strong conservative vibes from Shaina's family, and I wonder if that's the way Kyle leans. I feel like overall, the show has left out a lot of the pod discussions about deal-breakers, if they happened. In interviews after the show, Lauren and Cameron said they talked about politics and we saw them talking about race. I feel like the only such conversation we've seen this season is the Christian/atheist conversation, and it makes me wonder if couples aren't having them (e.g. Shayne and Natalie apparently not talking about money?) or if they're just leaving them out. I'd like to see them, if they're leaving them out. Like did Jarette and Mallory talk about what it would be like to be an interracial couple?

[binky101]

19 hours ago, Hpmec said:

Nick wasn't kidding when he said his mother wasn't the warm and welcoming type. Huge red flag. When someone isn't willing to put on a smile and at least try to be friendly when cameras are rolling, imagine the frostbite in real life. Run Danielle! 

Nick's mother and sisters did seem determined to rip him down and make him question himself at every turn, though the frosty reception they gave Danielle could have been editing to some degree. I do also have to wonder, based on your post about the previous episode, about Nick's orientation -- the camera subtly zoomed in on a rainbow bracelet Nick was wearing. i want this couple to work, but if Nick's closeted, that makes me tremendously sad if he feels he has to follow the heteronormative script for a love relationship.

And, just in general, what is with all of the drinking on this show? Every table seems filled with wine bottles, beer bottles, cocktails. Yes, yes, alcohol as social lubricant, but dang there's a lot of booze being imbibed. Is a single sober conversation too frightening to contemplate?

[binky101]

Shayne so often seems to come across as the jokey, perpetually immature, take-nothing-seriously dudebro type, but his explanation for WHY he wanted the neverending old-fashioned fountain seemed to reveal his deeper side and some true vulnerability. That was nice to see. And Natalie's "Shayne, my entire family is lactose intolerant!" should have been the title of the episode. (I sure hope these two last, they are certainly opposites but in this episode, in the quiet revealing moments, i can can see why they're a good couple.)

[SoapDoc]

31 minutes ago, binky101 said:

Shayne so often seems to come across as the jokey, perpetually immature, take-nothing-seriously dudebro type, but his explanation for WHY he wanted the neverending old-fashioned fountain seemed to reveal his deeper side and some true vulnerability. That was nice to see. And Natalie's "Shayne, my entire family is lactose intolerant!" should have been the title of the episode. (I sure hope these two last, they are certainly opposites but in this episode, in the quiet revealing moments, i can can see why they're a good couple.)

I appreciated his reasons too. I liked the fact that Natalie listened and acknowledged his wishes even if they were contrary to what would benefit her family. It seems like they were in a place that they could compromise without a lot of drama. 

The fact that he asked her what did she want to include from her culture impressed me --for a moment.  Perhaps it was producer driven.

Or maybe he actually had thought of that.

If he did, then maybe Natalie and Shane have actually talked about race and they just didn't show it.

[Hpmec]

Quote

1 hour ago, binky101 said:

Nick's mother and sisters did seem determined to rip him down and make him question himself at every turn, though the frosty reception they gave Danielle could have been editing to some degree. I do also have to wonder, based on your post about the previous episode, about Nick's orientation -- the camera subtly zoomed in on a rainbow bracelet Nick was wearing. i want this couple to work, but if Nick's closeted, that makes me tremendously sad if he feels he has to follow the heteronormative script for a love relationship.

And, just in general, what is with all of the drinking on this show? Every table seems filled with wine bottles, beer bottles, cocktails. Yes, yes, alcohol as social lubricant, but dang there's a lot of booze being imbibed. Is a single sober conversation too frightening to contemplate?

 

And what's with those gold glasses popping up everywhere? They became a distraction. 

As for Nick's orientation, I'm wondering if he is gay did Danielle ever pick up on it? I have a cousin who married a closeted gay guy. She had no clue until someone she knew spotted him getting cozy at a club with another guy. A nasty divorce followed. I'm wondering if some of the tension with the mother and sisters is because they know or suspect. Having seen them interacting with him for just a few minutes, I wouldn't want to be Nick. 

Edited February 19, 2022 by Hpmec

[Ms Blue Jay]

23 hours ago, NetflixandChill said:

I'm in love with Shake's mom and her telling him how amazing Deepti is and that she doesn't deserve someone giving her even half a percent less. Put him in his place, mama!

Amazing scene.

I am deeply in love with Natalie's Dad.  LOL.  Sweetest man.  Such a sweet man who only wants Natalie to be happy.  I can't even take it.

21 hours ago, Hpmec said:

Nick wasn't kidding when he said his mother wasn't the warm and welcoming type. Huge red flag. When someone isn't willing to put on a smile and at least try to be friendly when cameras are rolling, imagine the frostbite in real life. Run Danielle! 

That family scares me.  Mocking their son for showering and washing his hands?  I WOULD run.

15 hours ago, Court said:

Shane's mom is the best ever. 

Wait, did I miss a scene!  What happened with Shane's Mom?  (Or do you mean Shake's?)

Edited February 19, 2022 by Ms Blue Jay

[Irlandesa]

1 hour ago, Hpmec said:

And what's with those gold glasses popping up everywhere? They became a distraction.

It's for continuity.  Since producers edit and don't always show things in the order they happened or make the events seem closer together than real time, they have the glasses be opaque so you can't see how much liquid is left in the goblet. Therefore, you don't have a full glass, a half glass and then a full glass again within a 3 second span.

I don't know why they couldn't have another color, though.

Edited February 19, 2022 by Irlandesa

[snarts]

Are the beaded bracelets microphones? I've noticed that they all wear them.

[HerkyJerky]

On 2/18/2022 at 7:14 PM, Empress1 said:

Also, do those gold cups sponsor the show?

LOL!  I thought the same thing.  Did production get them wholesale?

[Ms Blue Jay]

Did they use the same cups on Season 1?  

[DearEvette]

Ok, so for me the Natalie/Shayne train is gaining some steam.  I am liking him more each episode.  I thought his and Natalie's planning conversation about the wedding was great.  I loved he only wanted 'two things'  -- the Old Fashioned Fountain and Cheese curds.  When he said 'Cheese Curds" i was like, wait, is Shayne from Wisconsin?  How did I miss that?  And sure enough he is.  I especially loved the 'why' explanation about the Old Fashions fountain. 

23 hours ago, binky101 said:

And Natalie's "Shayne, my entire family is lactose intolerant!" should have been the title of the episode.

And this part cracked me up.  How his family eats nothing but cheese.  Also her family doesn't drink and that is all they do in Wisconsin.  followed by him swigging out of the Dom bottle.

22 hours ago, SoapDoc said:

The fact that he asked her what did she want to include from her culture impressed me --for a moment.  Perhaps it was producer driven.

If he did, then maybe Natalie and Shane have actually talked about race and they just didn't show it.

I got the impression that they may have at least talked about her culture.  There had obviously been some off-screen coaching from her to him about some Korean phrases.  I got the feeling his mid-Western pronunciation was a running joke with them.  So I don't think his question was producer prompted. 

As far as parents go -- Jarette's, Shake's and Natalie's were great.  Especially Jarette's dad, Shake's mom and Natalie's dad (I thought he was so cute).  But whoo boy... Nick's family.  They are a mild step up from Shayna's.  My husband on Nick's mom:  'Now she is what they used to call a battle-axe.' 

Speaking of Nick, his and Danielle's relationship has lost all the goodwill I had for them in the first episode.  They are not it at all.  If you had told me after that first ep that I would think Natalie and Shayne were a good couple but Nick and Danielle made a toxic stew, I'd've been surprised.  But here we are. 

I know the show is hyping up contrast drama:  Nick is neat/Danielle is messy , Jarette likes ot go out/Iyanna is a homebody etc.  And some of those things are valid red flag but some I feel are just exaggerated.  Nick/Danielle's issues do seem like they can be really problematic.  The fact that she doesn't understand his issues with friends jumping on your furniture and breaking it in the name of fun is telling.  She's not 19 living in a dorm, she's  29 years old.  Meanwhile I think the Iyanna/Jarette thing may be slightly exaggerated.  So he wanted to go out and she didn't.  The scenes of her going to sleep in her lonely bed, with the long shot of his unslept on pillow was just a bit much. 

Shake's apartment is nice.  It totally has 'affluent bachelor' written all over it.

I am aggressively meh on Mallory and Salvador.  My husband says he has 'wedding cake topper' hair. LOL.

[LuvMyShows]

On 2/18/2022 at 5:59 PM, Hpmec said:

Shayne apparently has no clue how to dress when meeting a significant other's parents for the first time. I'm surprised Natalie didn't say something. I would have. 

I was so flabbergasted by that, especially since Natalie always looks stunning in an understated elegant way. And what's odd to me is that the severely tapered pant leg does not look good on him (to say nothing of the awfulness of the torn look).  When I was getting to know my now-husband, I was pleased with how he dressed, except for two things, so I definitely told him -- his slippers were too ratty, so I got him a nice comfy pair that color-coordinated with his bathrobe (he liked that touch!), and he wore sandals that were just too earthy for me, so he got a nice manly-looking pair of Nike slides.

On 2/18/2022 at 5:59 PM, Hpmec said:

Nick wasn't kidding when he said his mother wasn't the warm and welcoming type. Huge red flag. When someone isn't willing to put on a smile and at least try to be friendly when cameras are rolling, imagine the frostbite in real life. Run Danielle! 

I dunno...if I loved someone, I would not want to let a possible negative relationship with their mom, derail me from giving the relationship a shot.

On 2/19/2022 at 3:17 AM, Zuleikha said:

I do feel for her with Kyle. I think she felt pressured by the situation and said yes, but she knew right away it was a mistake. I don't know that she truly led Kyle on as he seemed to think. She was clear even when they first met that she was very concerned about the religion.

Gotta disagree.  I don't think she was pressured by the situation at all.  She was very clear that she believed Shayne was the man for her, even as she accepted Kyle's proposal, which I think she did in order to hedge her bets in case Kyle turned out to be all that.  Yes she had mentioned the religion problem in the pods but she was clearly willing to move past that, which is where she led Kyle on.  When his looks turned out to be not all that, she elevated the importance of the religion thing so she could get out of it easier.

On 2/19/2022 at 3:17 AM, Zuleikha said:

I don't understand Shake's issue with not feeling an animalistic attraction for Deepti. That type of attraction doesn't usually last through the years of a long marriage... it's new relationship energy. Maybe it's just not there for him, but he doesn't seem like he's trying to build it.

The problem is that what he has been putting in the effort to build, is their emotional and relationship connection, which would ordinarily be a good thing.  But it was already strong, and he wasn't putting any effort into working on the physical aspect with Deepti.  The part that was so mystifying was that he definitely felt and showed an animalistic attraction to her at the reveal but he is not able to access that anymore for some reason.

On 2/19/2022 at 3:17 AM, Zuleikha said:

Even though Nick shit stirs, and Danielle actively sabotages, I'm rooting for them. 

I like that description!

[Zuleikha]

Yes she had mentioned the religion problem in the pods but she was clearly willing to move past that, which is where she led Kyle on.  When his looks turned out to be not all that, she elevated the importance of the religion thing so she could get out of it easier.

She expressed doubts immediately after getting engaged--before she met Kyle and long before she saw Shayne. To me, her body language and voice both looked wary when she saw the ring box and throughout his whole proposal. I thought she came across in that conversation as expecting that she and Kyle were both on the same page that religion was a major issue and then like a deer in the headlights when he went through with the proposal. Shaina brought it up consistently--I don't think she ever said or did anything on screen to indicate that her concerns were insincere. 

If you look at how much Mallory cried when she said no to Jarrett, it's clearly not an easy thing for the women to turn down the proposals. I thought Jessica really wanted to turn Mark down last season as well.  

[snarts]

12 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

Yes she had mentioned the religion problem in the pods but she was clearly willing to move past that, which is where she led Kyle on.  When his looks turned out to be not all that, she elevated the importance of the religion thing so she could get out of it easier.

Agree. Shaina should've said no to the proposal but she didn't want her TV time to end. She had another opportunity to exit (somewhat) gracefully in Mexico, yet she returned again to try & stir up shit with Natalie/Shayne.

If Shayne had offered to dump Natalie but casually mentioned that he too is atheist/agnostic, I'd bet money that suddenly religion would no longer be an issue for her.

[P2C2E]

Dammit, I'm kinda rooting for Shayne and Nathalie now lol

[topanga]

On 2/19/2022 at 6:30 PM, snarts said:

Are the beaded bracelets microphones? I've noticed that they all wear them.

 

On 2/19/2022 at 10:34 PM, HerkyJerky said:

LOL!  I thought the same thing.  Did production get them wholesale?

They’re popular men’s bracelets these days. My college-age sons wear them. 
 

On 2/19/2022 at 12:17 AM, Zuleikha said:

I don't understand Shake's issue with not feeling an animalistic attraction for Deepti. That type of attraction doesn't usually last through the years of a long marriage... it's new relationship energy. Maybe it's just not there for him, but he doesn't seem like he's trying to build it.

On 2/20/2022 at 5:36 PM, LuvMyShows said:

The problem is that what he has been putting in the effort to build, is their emotional and relationship connection, which would ordinarily be a good thing.  But it was already strong, and he wasn't putting any effort into working on the physical aspect with Deepti.  The part that was so mystifying was that he definitely felt and showed an animalistic attraction to her at the reveal but he is not able to access that anymore for some reason.

I think Shake has been hoping that as he spends more time with Deepti, his physical attraction will grow organically. Speaking from personal experience, attraction isn’t something you can force, even if you’re with a person you really like. Feelings can grow over time, but you can’t will yourself into feeling passion for someone. 

And not having those feelings in a relationship can be a huge problem for both of you. If you’re the one who doesn’t feel the lust and passion, you feel unsatisfied and possibly wonder what’s wrong with you that you aren’t attracted to such a great person. And your partner will feel rejected and betrayed. It’s not good.