S05.E01 Leap Of Faith

[hookedontv]

4 minutes ago, Uncle JUICE said:

I felt like I was in a Hunter S. Thompson story, being directed by David Lynch, it was disorienting. 

I was catapulted back to my "Twin Peaks" watching days.....

[Uncle JUICE]

11 minutes ago, hookedontv said:

 

Full disclosure: tried it once and didn't like it at all. Nope. But the guy I was with wasn't wearing a baseball hat, so maybe the warm sensation is supposed to distract from the 24/7 hat? 

 

I imagine when he gets down to business, he turns it around, not only for practical purposes like being so so so close to his lover while lovemaking, but also because it's like a switch, that turns on the sex machine. Lincoln Hawk style.

[1011101010001]

15 minutes ago, Uncle JUICE said:

I got stuck on this scene for a second: her WHAT has Wifi? What did they asterisk out? My wife thinks it was "pussy"

But does it have a router?

10 minutes ago, Uncle JUICE said:

I imagine when he gets down to business, he turns it around, not only for practical purposes like being so so so close to his lover while lovemaking, but also because it's like a switch, that turns on the sex machine. Lincoln Hawk style.

Shouldn’t need blue pills at 51.  Maybe all the chemicals in the Marie Callender’s he is consuming include saltpeter.

[LennieBriscoe]

13 hours ago, Gobi said:

Join the live chat.

Dang, I forgot! Next time, mes amis!

Alina is going to get her heart broken. 

BG2 is likewise, but with less money. Because Usman's Rapping brings all the BGs to his yard!

You know what's awesome? WE aren't Michael Jackson YET, either! Hope springs! *Practicing Moonwalk 🚶‍♀️*

Edited December 13, 2021 by LennieBriscoe

[LennieBriscoe]

10 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

But does it have a router?

Shouldn’t need blue pills at 51.  Maybe all the chemicals in the Marie Callender’s he is consuming include saltpeter.

Oh, it's gonna have a router, all right. 

[1011101010001]

3 minutes ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Dang, I forgot! Next time, mes amis!

Alina is going to get her heart broken. 

BG2 is likewise, but with less money. Because Usman's Rapping brings all the BGs to his yard!

You know what's awesome? WE aren't Michael Jackson YET, either! Hope springs! *Practicing Moonwalk 🚶‍♀️*

If Kim has blinders to all of MJ’s character flaws, Soja Boy should walk on water.

[Uncle JUICE]

5 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

But does it have a router?

Shouldn’t need blue pills at 51.  Maybe all the chemicals in the Marie Callender’s he is consuming include saltpeter.

Woof, packed a lot of disturbing info into that tiny little interaction there. "Where did you get those...200...blue pills?" Of course the answer was "The internet." And of COURSE he tested them out. Had himself a pornathon, and jacked off so much he burnished the skin to a leathery shine, I bet. This is where we need a reality show to include the conversation between the producer and the camera operator in the car as they're leaving. "Dude, I would ask you what you thought the smell in there was, but how are we NOT going to talk about his Tijuana generic viagras?" "I didn't ASK if he'd tested them. He told me, then did that laugh, I swear I think my genitalia is out of commission for the next week as a result." 

[Baltimore Betty]

10 hours ago, The Goon said:

Kim looks like Milton Berle in drag.

I totally for real laughed out loud at that! It is all I can see when I look at her from now until the end of time!

[Uncle JUICE]

4 minutes ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Oh, it's gonna have a router, all right. 

HIYOOOOOO!

[1011101010001]

2 minutes ago, Uncle JUICE said:

Woof, packed a lot of disturbing info into that tiny little interaction there. "Where did you get those...200...blue pills?" Of course the answer was "The internet." And of COURSE he tested them out. Had himself a pornathon, and jacked off so much he burnished the skin to a leathery shine, I bet. This is where we need a reality show to include the conversation between the producer and the camera operator in the car as they're leaving. "Dude, I would ask you what you thought the smell in there was, but how are we NOT going to talk about his Tijuana generic viagras?" "I didn't ASK if he'd tested them. He told me, then did that laugh, I swear I think my genitalia is out of commission for the next week as a result." 

Luckily I have not yet had to purchase those pills but don’t they require a prescription?  So who knows what adulterated crap he is buying without one.  Kinda like how all these fools think they are buying opioids and get fentanyl instead.  Or coke cut with baby laxative.  What could go wrong?

[Baltimore Betty]

9 minutes ago, LennieBriscoe said:

 *Practicing Moonwalk 🚶‍♀️*

You would have thought Kim would have had mad moon walking skills but alas, she does not.

Did I hear her correctly that she is okay with Usman having another wife so he can have kids?

I wish her friend would have pushed her off that cliff, it would have saved her a lot of trouble and money.

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

Alina is a BOSS driving in city traffic and living her best life. When someone with a disability is accommodated they can do anything. I wish more people understood this. Looking at you schools w/ADHD kids who need things! But I digress.........

Gino Gino Gino. I think he is someone who has no shot at a relationship for a loaded quiver of reasons and needs a mail order bride. It's really an old story men have been doing this for ages.  I know someone who is neurodiverse and has issues and they imported a very average looking wife from another country and they are very happy. Gino's family is a family clearly harvesting the American Dollar of living off the auto industry in and around Detroit and that life is changing for people. They are fascinating to me. 

EVERYONE'S masking etiquette and attitudes is also fascinating insight. 

Edited December 13, 2021 by Alonzo Mosely FBI

[seacliffsal]

My heart goes to Alina and her parents as it must have been extremely hard to raise her in Russia.  The parents' concern for Alina was very real and I'm glad they talked her into taking her friend with her.  I wouldn't be surprised if Alina wasn't looking for a way out of Russia-first via the South African (and it sounded like she just decided to go see him, not that he invited her [ala Courtney]) and now with Caleb (who I think is totally about social media and building a storyline about his spirituality and inclusiveness but is going to demonstrate he doesn't have that much compassion for Alina).  Okay, now that I have expressed that I just want to add that Alina has intentionally decided to be on this show, so let the snarkfest begin.

There is no way I believe that Kim is only 50.  Just as I think multiple older participants lie about their age on these shows, I think she is also misrepresenting her age along with her desperation (and I am older so I'm not an ageist, I just think many of these participants misrepresent many things about themselves including their true ages).  I really, really, really hope that we don't have to listen to Usman's version of singing.

I also feel for Memphis and Gino as I think their stories are much more complex than we have seen.  But, again, they have chosen to put themselves on this show, so...

[Uncle JUICE]

That Caleb is a level ten douche, I can't believe I haven't mentioned how insufferable his 'philosophizing' is. I think it's me being older now, but hey, 25 year olds who think you know shit about the universe? Stow it. Just. Stop. "I'm drawing a symbol as it's easier to manifest that in my consciousness, then the universe can align with that intention." Hey, idea Caleb: quietly meditate on that for a while. I'm leaving the room. 

[1011101010001]

3 minutes ago, Uncle JUICE said:

That Caleb is a level ten douche, I can't believe I haven't mentioned how insufferable his 'philosophizing' is. I think it's me being older now, but hey, 25 year olds who think you know shit about the universe? Stow it. Just. Stop. "I'm drawing a symbol as it's easier to manifest that in my consciousness, then the universe can align with that intention." Hey, idea Caleb: quietly meditate on that for a while. I'm leaving the room. 

Tarot cards are never a good sign.

[greekmom]

11 hours ago, The Goon said:

Kim looks like Milton Berle in drag.

Dead on

[Uncle JUICE]

10 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

Tarot cards are never a good sign.

Are they ABOVE or BELOW "family astronomer"?

[magemaud]

3 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

Gino's idea of meet the woman, get her pregnant immediately, and then import her on a K-1 scares me, because he might end up on the original 90 days after this.      I guess Gino never looked at the time line for k-1, especially slowed down during a pandemic?   

I was amazed that Gino has already been married to a Brazilian woman and has been through the K-1 process before. 

 

4 hours ago, Uncle JUICE said:

 At first, I thought the hat had to be to cover up the scar left over from some brain injury...

You may be on to something here, I noted above that there seems to be something odd about his skull and the hat may be hiding more than just baldness. Edited to add: Maybe he has a big insurance settlement to live on. 

Edited December 13, 2021 by magemaud

[Mrs. Hanson]

11 hours ago, FrancescaFiore said:

Alina is my new favorite 90 Dayer. How awesome is she? Genuinely, look at all she's doing with her life, in spite of her dwarfism and the obstacles that puts in her way. I know of another similar woman with dwarfism who became first a burlesque dancer, then a very funny stand up comedian who opened nationally for Margaret Cho. Her name is Selene Luna and her philosophy is, "If I'm going to be a spectacle, then I'm going to be SPECTACULAR." I love that. Alina seems to embrace that same energy.

And  damned if 🎶 My pussy has wi-fi 🎶 isn't a real banger.

My hubs and I have seen, a few times live, a VERY talented "twin" of Alina who taught herself how to play the violin and plays it upside down.  Yeah, me too.  Her husband is of average stature.  Her name is Gaelynn Tressler and she is beyond talented.  

Oh Caleb - I am just not sure about you.  No wiat, I am sure.  You are a a sad sack.

[Uncle JUICE]

3 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

  

Oh Caleb - I am just not sure about you.  No wiat, I am sure.  You are a a sad sack.

Just a sack, in my book. 

[magemaud]

8 hours ago, Texasmom1970 said:

Is there a universe we don’t know about where Usman is famous. 😬

Might be the “Z List Universe” where someone also thought Angela should be back on Pillow Talk 

[1011101010001]

4 minutes ago, magemaud said:

Might be the “Z List Universe” where someone also thought Angela should be back on Pillow Talk 

Hey Travis Scott just got dropped as a headliner at Coachella, maybe Usman could step in!

[Pepper Mostly]

10 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

 

* The exception is male paraplegics. I'm not sure why, but my theory is it's because many men become paraplegic as a result of doing something thrilling and dangerous (and they often continue to do thrilling and dangerous stuff after they become paraplegic, too).

A good example is one of the guys I met years ago at a small wheelchair manufacturing place in Georgia. He had become a paraplegic when he was goofing around at top speed racing his motorcycle. 

When we were chatting, he mentioned to me that he was in the process of rigging up a motorcycle sidecar so that he could drive the motorcycle from the sidecar. Once that project was completed, he said he planned to begin motorcycle racing again.

Thank you for your post, @TwirlyGirly, I appreciate your insights and applaud you for laying them out so neatly and eloquently. Alina is a smart, beautiful and capable woman, and there is no way on earth she should be told that only some creep who fetishizes disabled women is the best she can hope for. 

I wanted to address the above snippet just to say I agree! My husband used to work in a facility for head and spinal injured patients, and most of them wound up there because of extreme risk taking behaviors on motorcycles. Or doing something stupid in water-diving in water that was too shallow, hot dogging on jet skis, and the like. 

8 hours ago, Texasmom1970 said:

Is there a universe we don’t know about where Usman is famous. 😬

Maybe he's big in Belgium? 

(Where all my Showbiz Moms and Dads peeps at?)

[Mrs. Hanson]

1 hour ago, greekmom said:

Dead on

Not to be "that poster" but I am 56.  BG Kim is 56 or north of it.   Or is living in constant sunshine taking a toll?  Saw the promo for next week:  Time to insert myself into his career time. 

[magemaud]

2 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Did I hear her correctly that she is okay with Usman having another wife so he can have kids?

Yes, she said it was a "cultural thing" and she was fine with it. I guess she's claiming that she's not jealous like Angela who would never consider that solution, but we shall see. 

[magemaud]

1 hour ago, Uncle JUICE said:

"I'm drawing a symbol as it's easier to manifest that in my consciousness, then the universe can align with that intention."

What a load of horseshit! Edited to add: Throw the "alien taking over his body" comment into the mix and you have a real idiot. 

Edited December 13, 2021 by magemaud

[Angel pie]

What kind of job does Caleb have?

 

[Uncle JUICE]

9 minutes ago, magemaud said:

What a load of horseshit! 

My wife guffawed because she knows how I am about stuff like this, and as usual I was watching it while doing something else either on my phone or computer. She looked right at me while he's saying it and said I gave it a perfect "dad" face, looking over my glasses like "Why are you saying that, it makes no sense at all". It's hard to explain, but I always like when she laughs like that, it's probably why I watch this show. 

10 minutes ago, Angel pie said:

What kind of job does Caleb have?

 

Barista is my guess. 

[hookedontv]

34 minutes ago, Angel pie said:

What kind of job does Caleb have?

I don't know what job Caleb currently has, but I'm sure he's hoping to get a hand or a blow job in the near future....

[Mrs. Hanson]

2 hours ago, Uncle JUICE said:

That Caleb is a level ten douche, I can't believe I haven't mentioned how insufferable his 'philosophizing' is. I think it's me being older now, but hey, 25 year olds who think you know shit about the universe? Stow it. Just. Stop. "I'm drawing a symbol as it's easier to manifest that in my consciousness, then the universe can align with that intention." Hey, idea Caleb: quietly meditate on that for a while. I'm leaving the room. 

Okay, this ^ made me laugh out loud.  I have a coworker who has a high school senior son.  He LEGIT wants to be a life coach.  He is on Instagram giving advice, bad spelling and all.  It is just so out there, too.  "Hey friends!  People reach out to me and want to know how I can be me.  Well, when you change your mindset, ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!" and on and on.  Do people 25 and under really think that my 56 year old self is looking for advice from them?

Caleb is what we call a Frookie.  (Pronounce the oo as a long u) Remember cookies made with juice instead of sugar?  Maybe they are still out there but I call those folks Frookie.

30 minutes ago, Uncle JUICE said:

Barista is my guess

Nicole 2.0!  

You fine folks make me laugh so hard!  Thank you!

Whoever said Caleb offering to carry Alina - spot on.  How condescending is that?  She is not a sack of flour, dumbass.

Edited December 13, 2021 by Mrs. Hanson

[Dobian]

I would watch all of Kim's segments if it's just her traveling around the country on a pilgrimage to Michael Jackson points of interest.  This week, Kim travels to the former Neverland Ranch!

[magemaud]

45 minutes ago, Angel pie said:

What kind of job does Caleb have?

All I can find is that he's a "former technician" (what the HELL does that mean?) who is "into fitness and bodybuilding competitions." My guess is that's code for "he's unemployed and lives rent-free in his parents' basement."

5 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Whoever said Caleb offering to carry Alina - spot on.  How condescending is that?  She is not a sack of flour, dumbass.

He even went on to say he would just "throw her over his shoulder." 

Edited December 13, 2021 by magemaud

[hookedontv]

1 minute ago, Dobian said:

This week, Kim travels to the former Neverland Ranch!

Maybe Kim could moonwalk to each destination. However, that would take years and years, she's the slowest moonwalker ever. And the worst at it. 

[Uncle JUICE]

3 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

 

Whoever said Caleb offering to carry Alina - spot on.  How condescending is that?  She is not a sack of flour, dumbass.

"Like a princess," says the show.

"Or, like Luke carried Yoda around on Dagobah." Says a stoned 46 year old watching with his wife.

[Breedom]

So far my favorite is Alina. She has such a great attitude, honesty and openness about her. I also like Caleb - but that could change. We'll see.

Memphis - the "sexy time" shower scene - with a shower cap on? No thanks. Not sexy at all. With her boyfriend grinning ear-to-ear.

Gino - okay so far, but that laugh - I will no doubt start to loath that sound as time goes on. The girlfriend is going to hurt him in the end.

KIm - 50 years old, my foot. She could pass for her mom's sister. I can see I'm not going to get along with this one. She's deluding herself thinking Usman wants her. Why would he pick her over multitudes of other "older" women if he's into that? What charisma, personality, attractiveness puts her in the forefront? It was strictly Kim's gullibility that joined these two together. TLC already showed her throwing a glass of something or other into Usman's face. Who, in real life, really does this? Lady, find someone your own age in the US where there could be a possibility of companionship. And admit that you are waaaaaay past 50 years old.

 

 

 

 

[Breedom]

9 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Whoever said Caleb offering to carry Alina - spot on.  How condescending is that?  She is not a sack of flour, dumbass.

But Alina had the class to tell him that she doesn't like to be carried, in a way that didn't make him look the fool.

[Dobian]

10 minutes ago, hookedontv said:

Maybe Kim could moonwalk to each destination. However, that would take years and years, she's the slowest moonwalker ever. And the worst at it. 

Not to derail the thread but a former colleague of mine was an extra in the audience where MJ was performing for a Pepsi commercial when his hair caught on fire.  She had a full view from a few feet away of MJ with his head blazing.  He was on fire that day, literally.  Kim could visit this sacred ground.

[hookedontv]

17 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Whoever said Caleb offering to carry Alina - spot on.  How condescending is that?  She is not a sack of flour, dumbass.

Alina is very much an adult and likes (and deserves) to be treated as such. To me, being picked up and carried would feel like someone was treating me like a kid or baby, which she clearly is not. Just ask her wifi connection. 

[1011101010001]

Except Alina said she would allow Caleb to do it, so I guess it’s selective humiliation.

Kim’s much younger friends seemed right out of the Sharp casting pool.  The one had a similar face and expressions to the Slatons, so maybe she is their California cuz.

[LennieBriscoe]

So now I'm wondering if the "G" in "5G" stands for "Genitalia." 😈

 

[Uncle JUICE]

Which one of these dopes was like "I'm being smart with my savings!" then proceeded to list all of the money they'd sent overseas, was that the guy who has a body dissolving in a tub off camera, or the shower cap lady? 

[LennieBriscoe]

1 hour ago, magemaud said:

Yes, she said it was a "cultural thing" and she was fine with it. I guess she's claiming that she's not jealous like Angela who would never consider that solution, but we shall see. 

Grangela would be so fast with a layer cake...!

[Rebky]

I hated the way Kim said Usman's name in a singsong way like she was announcing a WWE wrestler entering the ring. UGH. Talk about being easily impressed! 🤨

[Uncle JUICE]

26 minutes ago, Rebky said:

I hated the way Kim said Usman's name in a singsong way like she was announcing a WWE wrestler entering the ring. UGH. Talk about being easily impressed! 🤨

This reminds me of the best thing to ever come out of the 90 day franchises: whenever I hear a crappy song, I always tell my wife "Man, you gotta get Usman on this track!"

Thanks Robert, who I sincerely hope is living his best life with his adorable Annie and I believe 9th and 10th children. Not the greatest guy of all time, but easily the best line in the entire series. Dancey dancey...dancey dancey Baby COOOL!

[applewood]

On 12/11/2021 at 9:04 AM, GussieK said:

You are mostly right but there are exceptions.  I work in the disability rights community. There are some disabled people who marry nondisabled people. There are some mixed stature marriages too. Now as for anyone who appears on this show, they are publicity seekers, so motives are suspect. 

Don't forget about Matt and Caryn, Amy and Chris and Zack and Tori from LPBW and Liz and Bryce from 7 Little Johnsons.

I think I watch too many reality shows if remember all these names. LOL

[Mrs. Hanson]

5 hours ago, hookedontv said:

I was catapulted back to my "Twin Peaks" watching days.....

Did you fetch yourself a piece of cherry pie?

 

1 hour ago, Uncle JUICE said:

Which one of these dopes was like "I'm being smart with my savings!" then proceeded to list all of the money they'd sent overseas, was that the guy who has a body dissolving in a tub off camera, or the shower cap lady? 

Caleb said this but I can not verify if Shower Cap Nurse admitted to sending money.

 

2 hours ago, magemaud said:

All I can find is that he's a "former technician" (what the HELL does that mean?) who is "into fitness and bodybuilding competitions." My guess is that's code for "he's unemployed and lives rent-free in his parents' basement."

I think you are spot on.

I watched this while feverish Sunday morning.  Now that I am feeling better I may have to throw it on again!

[Lambie]

1 hour ago, Uncle JUICE said:

Which one of these dopes was like "I'm being smart with my savings!" then proceeded to list all of the money they'd sent overseas, was that the guy who has a body dissolving in a tub off camera, or the shower cap lady? 

That would be Gino. Who enjoys the "simple things" in life but also enjoys fake boobs, lashes, teeth, lips, fillers, and relationships. 

 

[Breedom]

32 minutes ago, Lambie said:

That would be Gino. Who enjoys the "simple things" in life but also enjoys fake boobs, lashes, teeth, lips, fillers, and relationships. 

He knows if he didn't fork over the money, it would be over, despite all of these people considering their new relationships "the love of my life".

[hookedontv]

1 hour ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Did you fetch yourself a piece of cherry pie?

 

Yes, then sat on the couch holding a log. 

[Pepper Mostly]

6 hours ago, Angel pie said:

What kind of job does Caleb have?

 

Exterminator? That seems to be a trend among the douche-y young men on this show.