S04.E06: The Halfway Handoff

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Quote

Doug risks parole when a family feud breaks out; Nicolle's shocking confession stuns Daonte.

Original air date 2021.07.23

Doug is in a feud?  Doug could lose his parole?  Our Doug?  Sweet, gentle Doug?  Doug who never takes offense at anything? The most calm, rational person on the show?  Okay, I'll stop.  People who are surprised Doug gets riled up:

We all know Daonte would be shocked by anything.  So from last week's episode, it is highly likely that the lovely Nicolle will tell him she had sex with women while in prison.  Imagining that sex is the closest Daonte is going to get to having sex with her, so he might as well ask for details rather than clutching his pearls. 

 

[hookedontv]

On 7/17/2021 at 11:35 AM, PrincessPurrsALot said:

Imagining that sex is the closest Daonte is going to get to having sex with her, so he might as well ask for details rather than clutching his pearls.  while clutching Nicolle Jr. 

Fixed it.

[sempervivum]

Muskrat Stan's toupee seems to be channeling Der Fuhrer- all he needs is a toothbrush mustache to complete the look. Lisa needs Spanx, along with a better hairdresser.

Brittany needs a better wig, and a better makeup artist. In her talking heads, she looks like an overweight witch. Ray seems deeply depressed (not that I blame him).

Speaking of deeply depressed, where's the Pickle and her jailbird? Not in the previews, either.

I want more, more, more of Daonte's friend! I want none, none, none of Daonte's crotch.

Anissa may just be the stupidest person we've ever seen on this show. She rivals some of the dummies of 90DF. Interesting that (after a 6 year sex drought), she shows up hoping for a roll in the hay with the Toothless Wonder wearing not a skintight mini dress with hooker heels, but a mumsy earth tone floral blouse and baggy jeans.

I'm baffled by Rachel. She's not terrible looking, and she's made something of herself. Although I laughed at the tone deafness of her rolling up to that hillbilly hovel in a shiny new Escalade.  And I'll join the chorus: Poor Dougie. 

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Stan tamed the muskrat on his head for the evening while Lisa got what looked like a 70s macrame wall hanging sewn onto her head.  They are vying for the award for the couple with the worst hair.

Aw, Daonte got to spend an intimate and fulfilling night with Nicolle, -- Jr. that is.  Okay, maybe not as fulfilling but at this point I'm not sure he remembers how to have sex with a full sized woman that has arms and legs. He is so creepy.  Meanwhile, hi Daonte's friend Derrick.  Call me! 

Oh and Daonte, people are not jealous that you have a woman with you that looks like a crack ho that recently got clean.  Great clothing choices.  Way to make people think you hired her for the evening. In a way, I guess you have.  You've shelled out quite a bit of money so far for two weak lap dances and a partial foot job. 

Both of these men are so desperate for sex with these women that they push really hard.  Muskrat Stan is trying to top from the bottom which is only annoying the charming lass, Lisa.  He really thinks if he cajoled her to his house she'll be so overwhelmed with lust she'll take him to the basement and pound one out. He was giving vibes like he was going to lock her down there and hold her captive.  She's scum and she still deserves better than him.  Hell, his toupee deserves better than him. 

[Keywestclubkid]

She will never, never, never have sex with that man. If she was going to she would already have. This man is a fucking idiot 

[PrincessPurrsALot]

36 minutes ago, sempervivum said:

Muskrat Stan's toupee seems to be channeling Der Fuhrer- all he needs is a toothbrush mustache to complete the look. Lisa needs Spanx, along with a better hairdresser.

You are so right.  Stan is sporting Der Fuhrer.  He had  choice of so many wigs and he picked puffy Hitler.  His bad decision making knows no bounds.  

[AZChristian]

Anyone else notice the stain on the back of Nicolle's dress?  Looks like her bladder leaked and those tiny panties couldn't accommodate a Poise pad.

[HorrrGoodnight]

Nicolle saw those dollar signs fading and decided to throw Daonte a bone (😅). He seems pretty easily sustainable but I'm wondering how long before he snaps. 

[SevenCostanza]

3 hours ago, PrincessPurrsALot said:

Aw, Daonte got to spend an intimate and fulfilling night with Nicolle, -- Jr. that is.  Okay, maybe not as fulfilling but at this point I'm not sure he remembers how to have sex with a full sized woman that has arms and legs. He is so creepy. 

😂  

[RealReality]

1 hour ago, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

Nicolle saw those dollar signs fading and decided to throw Daonte a bone (😅). He seems pretty easily sustainable but I'm wondering how long before he snaps. 

Nichole played that wrong.  

She should have called his bluff.  Faked outrage that he would even SUGGEST she was into his money and insist on making him "work" to get her back.  

Tell him that she was soooo close to sleeping with him, but now that he "yelled at her" she doesn't feel close to him anymore.  

Tell him he needs to "regain her trust"

By work and regain trust I mean spend money.  

Daonte is all sunk cost fallacy and self-hate.  He also knows that he can't be smug around his friends and family when Nichole takes off.  

[Nuccganggang]

i squealed with glee when ray’s nana peeled into the halfway house parking lot with that huge shit eating grin on her face 🤣 

[Adeejay]

Daonte thought his friend Derrick would be impressed with "what I have", but Derrick knows a gamer when he sees one.  Nicolle is playing with danger.  She should stop leading him on, because one day he is going to snap.   

After seeing Doug's family and their situation, my heart broke for Dougie, Jr.  I hope he doesn't end up back there.  They went from 30 decibels to a 100 in about 30 seconds.  I would call them "Trash", but that would be too kind.    

[SemiCharmedLife]

 Daonte is getting  more action from Nicolle Jr than Nicolle.  He should stick with Jr. and send the other one packing.  She is a user and is awful!  Derrick saw right through her bs and didn't mind asking the hard questions.

[Auntie Anxiety]

3 hours ago, Adeejay said:

I would call them "Trash", but that would be too kind.  

His “White Trash” prison tattoo that runs down his leg is for aspirational purposes, as that would be a step up from “Human Excrement.”

[Pepper Mostly]

21 hours ago, Keywestclubkid said:

She will never, never, never have sex with that man. If she was going to she would already have. This man is a fucking idiot 

Hilariously, this statement could apply to several people. Nicole, Lisa, and Anissa. 

15 hours ago, Adeejay said:

Daonte thought his friend Derrick would be impressed with "what I have", but Derrick knows a gamer when he sees one.  Nicolle is playing with danger.  She should stop leading him on, because one day he is going to snap.       

I was DYING. Daonte thinks his intelligent, perceptive and extremely good looking friend is going to be envious because Daonte scored Nicole? Scrawny, bleachy haired, ratchet skanks aren't exactly hard to find. 

I can't believe that Daonte is buying Nicole's "I have anxiety" dodge. If she was "anxious" about "being intimate" she wouldn't be tantalizing him one second then throwing cold water on him the next. She's testing boundaries but she's not too bright. 

12 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

His “White Trash” prison tattoo that runs down his leg is for aspirational purposes, as that would be a step up from “Human Excrement.”

To be fair, probably neither Doug nor the tattoo artist could spell "excrement". 

Lisa's getup was really, um, something. 

[Keywestclubkid]

Question if Doug wasn’t and isn’t allowed out on the weekend wouldn’t the cops know? I mean he has a tracking device on his leg. I’m calling bullshit. 

[AZChristian]

1 minute ago, Keywestclubkid said:

Question if Doug wasn’t and isn’t allowed out on the weekend wouldn’t the cops know? I mean he has a tracking device on his leg. I’m calling bullshit. 

They showed him calling his parole officer (who was supposed to approve his trip) and leaving a message.  "I am going to see my father in Kalamazoo.  Call me if you need to talk to me."  I think he thinks he's covered for "permission"  now.

His leg tattoo should read "White Sewage," not "White Trash."  'Cause he's full of **it.

[hookedontv]

3 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

To be fair, probably neither Doug nor the tattoo artist could spell "excrement". 

I’m sure that there’s a “No Regerts” tattoo somewhere on Doug…

[AZChristian]

2 minutes ago, hookedontv said:

I’m sure that there’s a “No Regerts” tattoo somewhere on Doug…

Reminds me of an old episode of Judge Joe Brown.  Plaintiff was suing because defendant messed up his tattoo.

Plaintiff's nickname was "BLAZE" . . . and that's what he wanted tatted across his stomach in LARGE letters (yes, including flames).  Defendant wanted to "stylize" it a bit, so he made the "z" backwards.  So tough guy plaintiff ended up with the word "BLASE" on his stomach.

Full amount for plaintiff's suit, plus extra in the hopes he could find a tattoo artist with less stylization skills and better spelling skills to fix it.  Nothing "blase" about him.

Back to LAL . . . 

[Lambie]

Folks, I have binge watched 2.5 seasons in the last 2 weeks to be able to join you fine folks! NO REGRETS.

This cast is spectacular. I saw the ramen noodle memes and now that I know the people involve -- sublime. Amazing. TV perfection.

I do feel for Daonte despite his willful ignorance. I had no use for Shawn and his stupidity because he had 6 kids he should have been focusing on. Daonte seems like there really is something off about him. I wonder what his service time was like in the Marines. 

Can someone please recap how the Doug/Dougie fight went from 0 to 100 in 3 seconds? What was the deal with the letters? They were letters from Doug to Dougie? Who was the woman he was fighting with, his sister? Dougie is so damaged and as likable and smart as Rachel seems, she's not the one to step in because she's making staggeringly dumb life choices. 

I love Ray's grandmother. That smile when she screeched into the parking lot IN A PICKUP TRUCK was life. 

And this has been bothering me from season 2 -- COVID! It's like it doesn't exist for these people! 

I'm so excited to get to know you all! I actually bought the short series Prison Wives that aired about a decade ago. Grace Darkhorse? Any fans? 

[RealReality]

Re - Doug and the family. 

I believe how it went down was that the trash aunt started saying "oh you should see these letters I found that dougie wrote"

And dougie was like "if you do that I'll never talk to you again"

And shitbird aunt, who is in her element being a cruel, bitter bitch says "ha ha, you should see the letters, I'll get them they are all about how shitty he thinks his life is and how he hates it, ha ha"

Dougie protests and his gem of a sperm donor was like "yeah, get em, get em, I want to see em!"

And dougies slightly less terrible aunt jumped in and said that the terrible aunt had treated dougie like shit.  

And Doug gets mad and starts yelling because terrible aunt "was the only one who stepped up and took Doug when he went to prison" and slightly less terrible aunt protests thar she would have taken dougie but she is married to a felon and so she couldn't. 

Doug (who sidesteps responsibility for having actually been the one who abandoned his son in the first place) starts yelling that the terrible aunt isn't shitty she is just "messing with him" and she is only being a shit "because she cares."

I think less terrible aunt or Rachel says something and Doug starts yelling about shut the fuck up bitch. 

And this is all such a great move for a guy who completely ignored his parole officer.  Because one of those neighbors is just as likely to call the cops. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

@Lambie, welcome to the unpolished turd gem known as Love After Lockup. For a really good time, join the Live Chat on Friday as we watch and snark together to our hearts’ content. Hilarity ensues.

[Auntie Anxiety]

18 minutes ago, RealReality said:

And shitbird aunt, who is in her element being a cruel, bitter bitch says "ha ha, you should see the letters, I'll get them they are all about how shitty he thinks his life is and how he hates it, ha ha"

If Dougie had written that his life is great and wonderful, I’d be more concerned about his psychological health. At least the kid was astute enough to realize that the situation sucked. His mother abandoned him. His father abandoned him. His father’s family abandoned him. His life IS shitty. 

Where is Dougie’s mother’s family? Yeah, rhetorical question.

[Lambie]

1 hour ago, RealReality said:

Re - Doug and the family. 

I believe how it went down was that the trash aunt started saying "oh you should see these letters I found that dougie wrote"

And dougie was like "if you do that I'll never talk to you again"

And shitbird aunt, who is in her element being a cruel, bitter bitch says "ha ha, you should see the letters, I'll get them they are all about how shitty he thinks his life is and how he hates it, ha ha"

Dougie protests and his gem of a sperm donor was like "yeah, get em, get em, I want to see em!"

And dougies slightly less terrible aunt jumped in and said that the terrible aunt had treated dougie like shit.  

And Doug gets mad and starts yelling because terrible aunt "was the only one who stepped up and took Doug when he went to prison" and slightly less terrible aunt protests thar she would have taken dougie but she is married to a felon and so she couldn't. 

Doug (who sidesteps responsibility for having actually been the one who abandoned his son in the first place) starts yelling that the terrible aunt isn't shitty she is just "messing with him" and she is only being a shit "because she cares."

I think less terrible aunt or Rachel says something and Doug starts yelling about shut the fuck up bitch. 

And this is all such a great move for a guy who completely ignored his parole officer.  Because one of those neighbors is just as likely to call the cops. 

Thank you RealReality. I thought there were multiple shit aunts involved but then I thought maybe Dougie's mother was one of the women he was screaming at. 

Whenever I hear Stan speak I can't help but think of this:

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jagh6HIURT8

@Auntie Anxiety I can't wait to join live chat! 

 

Edited July 25, 2021 by Lambie
Embedded video didn't work

[Pepper Mostly]

Welcome to our merry band of miscreants, @Lambie. Great to have you here!

[SemiCharmedLife]

2 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

@Lambie, welcome to the unpolished turd gem known as Love After Lockup. For a really good time, join the Live Chat on Friday as we watch and snark together to our hearts’ content. Hilarity ensues.

I am dying to join the live chat and I think it is the only one I can actually join in on, since I am on the west coast and the air time seems to be the same.  HOWEVER, I am a closet LALU watcher and would have to find something else for my husband to do while I indulge in this dumpster fire.  He already side eyes me for watching "drag queen competitions, tattoo shows and rich ladies fighting with each other."  Adding inmate/felon love might push him over the edge.  😉

[Gobi]

28 minutes ago, SemiCharmedLife said:

I am dying to join the live chat and I think it is the only one I can actually join in on, since I am on the west coast and the air time seems to be the same.  HOWEVER, I am a closet LALU watcher and would have to find something else for my husband to do while I indulge in this dumpster fire.  He already side eyes me for watching "drag queen competitions, tattoo shows and rich ladies fighting with each other."  Adding inmate/felon love might push him over the edge.  😉

Tell him that you’re conducting sociology research.

[PrincessPurrsALot]

The other gem we got from Doug during the fight was that is was good that his sister was so tough on Dougie.  It'll toughen him up.  Yep, sure work out well for Doug Sr. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

At some point, Dougie might decide that going to prison is a reasonable alternative to the hand he’s been dealt. I’m not sure that I’d disagree.

Edited July 25, 2021 by Auntie Anxiety

[RealReality]

3 hours ago, SemiCharmedLife said:

I am dying to join the live chat and I think it is the only one I can actually join in on, since I am on the west coast and the air time seems to be the same.  HOWEVER, I am a closet LALU watcher and would have to find something else for my husband to do while I indulge in this dumpster fire.  He already side eyes me for watching "drag queen competitions, tattoo shows and rich ladies fighting with each other."  Adding inmate/felon love might push him over the edge.  😉

I miss drag race.  

[nutella fitzgerald]

As vile as Doug is, I was pleasantly surprised to hear him say he actually decided against a white pride tattoo. 
 

The bar really is low on this show, isn’t it?

[hookedontv]

21 hours ago, RealReality said:

Re - Doug and the family. 

I believe how it went down was that the trash aunt started saying "oh you should see these letters I found that dougie wrote"

And dougie was like "if you do that I'll never talk to you again"

And shitbird aunt, who is in her element being a cruel, bitter bitch says "ha ha, you should see the letters, I'll get them they are all about how shitty he thinks his life is and how he hates it, ha ha"

Dougie protests and his gem of a sperm donor was like "yeah, get em, get em, I want to see em!"

And dougies slightly less terrible aunt jumped in and said that the terrible aunt had treated dougie like shit.  

And Doug gets mad and starts yelling because terrible aunt "was the only one who stepped up and took Doug when he went to prison" and slightly less terrible aunt protests thar she would have taken dougie but she is married to a felon and so she couldn't. 

Doug (who sidesteps responsibility for having actually been the one who abandoned his son in the first place) starts yelling that the terrible aunt isn't shitty she is just "messing with him" and she is only being a shit "because she cares."

I think less terrible aunt or Rachel says something and Doug starts yelling about shut the fuck up bitch. 

And this is all such a great move for a guy who completely ignored his parole officer.  Because one of those neighbors is just as likely to call the cops. 

Thank you RR, because I honestly couldn't keep anyone straight and didn't know who was who. I should have taken notes -- I have REGERTS about that.

[Shauna]

I absolutely love all the faces of Rachel.  However, she will be sorry when the lines start to settle in, say, in about 5 or so years. 

[AZChristian]

7 minutes ago, Shauna said:

I absolutely love all the faces of Rachel.  However, she will be sorry when the lines start to settle in, say, in about 5 or so years. 

If Doug is causing them, I doubt he'll be a problem for her for more than about 5 or so months . . . not years.  Hopefully, he's gone before he can cause permanent wrinkles.

[SemiCharmedLife]

21 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

At some point, Dougie might decide that going to prison is a reasonable alternative to the hand he’s been dealt. I’m not sure that I’d disagree.

That's kind of what his dad was saying...he didn't feel he was missing out on much being in prison.  What an existence.  😔

[RealReality]

On 7/25/2021 at 10:29 PM, nutella fitzgerald said:

As vile as Doug is, I was pleasantly surprised to hear him say he actually decided against a white pride tattoo. 
 

The bar really is low on this show, isn’t it?

If you walked by it, you'd trip....maybe