heebiejeebie

Even with McKellan the backne blokes of One Direction have all the charm of five Channing Tatums. Or a half hour of listening to a Richard Gere anecdote. In a perfect world. Or just one where the booking agent for the show knows how to actually do the job, it would have been McKellan and Keaton and Oliver on the couch. I found Oliver's over twee Friend of Oprah so annoying as fuck but when he isn't bleating about all the poor little fat kids in the world* he can be fun and gracious. *I am an advocate for healthy eating and I do think on some level he is sincere. He is also a huge famewhore at times which takes charge. UK version of freeing kiddies from bad food was fine; the US version was so exploitative and manipulative it ended up undermining the message almost completely.

I figured the VanderpimpyTodds were thinking Jason's bland game show host looks would offset the Panda's jay Leno-esque jaw and weird forehead. But seeing Jason at the "award" ceremony and I think he is like Ablie Manzo. Bland and going to seed two seconds after he reached "attractive".

Oh gawd. I'm scared. I agreed with the judges. Someone hold me.....I'm...so...cold. Seriously Fabio's did have some fit issues. But damn that was all kinds of hot. The guy had something to do with that, but it was really oddly and intriguingly sexy. I liked Jay's too if a date showed up in that. Not something I would wear. But Fabio's? Yeah. and no way would I have waited to kiss Fabio's model. I'm actually glad I slowed down channel surfing when I heard Michelle saying how bad Fabio and Jay both did. Knew one of them was headed for the win and was curious. I hate that they saved someone. This is all stars and there was pretty much an ocean of suck washing down the runway tonight. Everything else was bad. Some of it was real bad. The rest was garbage that should have been set on fire right then and there to appease the affronts to fashion. If that also meant throwing the designers responsible on top of the blaze. So be it. ETA: Michelle and her attempt to bring back the Members Only aesthetic?! Zippers? There? I'm surprised she didn't have the guy drenched in Axe Body spray and forget hair and makeup. All he needed was to step out of a Trans Am with the cassette stereo blazing "You Spin Me Right Round Baby Right round, like a record baby...."

But. but.. but. when a young man goes off with a gun and murders people it is all the violence and testosterone of Hollywood movies and video games. So men wanting equal rights for gender, sexual identity and ethnicity is bad. But it is all the fault of the entertainment industry (and one of the culprits in girly girling the poor beleaguered straight white male) when a gun gets in the hands of someone who exhibits the same valued male traits, just to an extreme. Fox News. Where they will always have it both ways. No matter how opposite both are.

Dorian Warren *swoon*. He is what Ronan Farrow pretends to be behind a cloak of nepotistic opportunities that puff out a resume without any real substance of man or achievement. The pale toad that is Russert fils doesn't even deserve to be mentioned in the same sentence as Dorian other than as an example of the two ends of the intellect spectrum.

I'm as vain and shallow as they come. I did not think Mauricio looked that bad. He could hit the gym more but compared to most men, even on the show, he is still the superficially best looking for me this season. However Ken in that white shirt with the oddly placed black stripe down it? Holy moly talk about great pumpkins Charlie Brown. If Mauricio's weight was yacht bloat Ken ate the ship itself.

I'm wondering how long Rinna can play cheerleader to the crass lowbrow Vanderpump and Todd duo? Rinna is a bit bawdy herself as a public persona. But more than once I saw her shifting her eyes a bit. You can see her looking at the dog and Rocio as Ken sits down and shifting his body like the help at the table threatens an onset of cooties. There is a slight bit of bafflement and then it looks like she actually gets what is going on. I want to see the moment when Rocio makes Ken and Lisa a special mole. Lance Bass has become Bravo's little whore hasn't he? I'm surprised Andy Cohen and he haven't cooked up the Real 'Mo's of Palm Springs. I still want to know what the award committee considers Humanitarian efforts. By Vanderpump? Watch her. she looks like she is always ready to grab. anything. Everything. And I have yet to see her really use her shows to promote any real cause. Whoring out her staff for a half-assed gay pride parade simply to film an episode for her show does not count. Let alone her running after the WeHo bar crowd her two places weren't pulling in with her new bar. I would so love a real BH wife that runs in the charity circuit to show up. Both the Vanderpump-Todds and the Fosters have a very bad rep of glomming onto friends who pay the tab for charity event tables etc and then act all empty pockets when it is time to make a pledge. On the other hand Rinna and Hamlin have a very good rep for giving time even if it is for press coverage. Again. I'll be interested in seeing how long Rinna can stand being put into a "prop Lisa Vanderpump's ego" role on the show. The wedding was nice. I'm a bit hard hearted though in that I thought the scenes with Monty were a bit overdone. Sincere at heart but a bit gushing instead of being as personal as I think they could have been. But I don't think the Richards sisters have it in them to just be sincere if there are cameras around. From the day the two strutted into the grocery store season one with cameras in tow, Kim and Kyle seem to operate with a flip switch that is automatic if the camera goes on. I was happy that Kathy was able to let Kim have her moment/day. Though that might have been editing. Eileen is playing a role and I think it could come back and bite her and the show in the ass.

Three or four of the younger set of guys from Mad Men were on The Soup a couple of times with good timing. Elizabeth Moss can be very very funny. I would not mind a Mad Men cast panel including Hamm to pimp the second part of the finals season this coming new year.

The problem is, to me, the scripted/contrived stuff has always been the show. To the point I'm thinking none of the couples were ever or are really couples. Kristen and Jax had an against the wall moment and have worked it into "plot". and she rebounds with a busboy while TrampMeister Vanderpimp just happens to hire someone desperate enough to find Jax and his Easter Island head and glazed eyes attractive? Yeah. At this point half the cast are originals and the other half are "dating" them for camera time. I hope there is at least so boredom fucking going on on the sly. Or should we call it "time slotting" since it seems every single one of these incestuous freaks (and Lisa is the biggest of them all) is only interested in being on for camera time. And really show? Haven't go-carts been done to death on reality shows as "moments". Its like watching balding teenagers with aging skin mope and snarl at each other. Stassi is such a bad actress. She can't deliver a single scene of outrage as authentic as she can't help but smirk at simply being on camera. When she was trying to lay down the law to Schwartz (who manages to give the impression he is aging in one of the time-lapsed films every time he appears. I keep expecting by the end of of a five minute scene to see him sport a gut and have more hair growing out his ears than his scalp), she looked like she was pleasuring herself she was so giddy and aware of the camera. And Katie looked like she had gotten a different scene set up description. She kept looking like the scene was supposed to play out a bit differently but was still trying to follow Stassi's tangest. Even though we know all three got their post-it which said "Stassi and Katie return to apt where Stassi confronts Tom S about his friendship with Jax"

I live in the snow belt. But have traveled enough and am well enough read to realize Christmas happens in places snow doesn't happen. What annoys me is why they try to pretend the movie is taking place where it is cold and snowy. When the grass and foliage is greener and thicker than most snow belt regions get at the height of a wet summer. Why not just say it is taking place in the region it is being filmed? The movie that Candace Cameron is in is supposed to be in frigid Alaska and half the extras seem to be dying of the heat. In their log sleeved shirts even as the main cast is supposed to bundled up. Speaking of Candace Cameron. Wow is she a bad actress. And I have to wonder having heard that she is a bitch on wheels on set. Why is she cast? And does her fifties heavy handed makeup she sports in every movie reflect the stylists disgruntlement with her rumored on set attitude? There was a movie on last night about the woman who gets the brooch who can then hear people's thoughts. Really really weird. Odd moments that make no sense in the overall scheme of things. But the secondary roles sport some really hot guys. Much better looking than the romantic lead. The Anne Heche movie was such a trainwreck plotwise. Was it based on a book? I always thought the Hallmark Hall of Fame movies usually were. And were supposed to be moving and meanginful. This just had so many random moments just piled on. And it had such an odd tone. The puppy causes a fire which burns down the jail (yeah like that building Iwouldn't have smoke detectors or that a fire could start so easily with a building full of employees not noticing) and the scene starts out as weirdly 'uh-oh" whimsy before shifting to dramatic fire escape. Doctor/love interest was hot as hell though. It seems almost half of these movies have a paradoxical inversion of male hotness in lead to plot idiocy/bad acting.

To be fair did you notice the car he id driving? The kid is wearing earbuds and poor ignored dad is driving a wagon that looks like even Mike and Carol Brady would say its time for some new wheels. Sullen snot son and a station wagon that looks almost Depression era and I'd say the off ramp to the after life might be rather tempting. I've already voiced my annoyance at the kid and this ad a few pages back. But no thing I never mentioned was the oddness of the dad just starting to walk off before the deer has really "taken off". How does he know another deer isn't going to break from his feeding to gore the kid? Or the kid won't try to see what is behind that mystic fog? It's just an all together stupid ad. Not as bad as the shrunken oranges and entitled sociopath tykes. Go ahead and cut the head off your toy horse little twit. Go to the store to buy you those tangerines? Nope. Instead as you turn off the light to go to bed you can't help notice the bright glow out the window. you look, and there is daddy burning every. single, thing, you .hold dear. How about that for some orange? you want war kiddo? Daddy is going to the mattresses.

I might have to toss this aside. Even as a game to watch how bad Milano can sartorially get each week is losing what little charm it had. But seeing Helen get in the top two? For an outfit I was determined was in the bottom three. it was horribly constructed. The fit and style of the top and bottom actually seemed like someone tried to create an outfit out of a top from one designer's collection and one from another. It was not the worst. But to be the second best? Even in that wave of dreck that washed down the runway? Another week of the best being something that would have been the worst in previous seasons. I just can't. Plus it means I don't have see any of the Threads ads and hear that simpering snide nails on chalkboard voice of the Simmons nepotistic product placement.

I'm so glad Adam is gone. At least for now. He is almost as annoying as Blaise of Douche when it comes to loving hearing the sound of his own voice. Every thing had to be some profound deep meaning of pots and pans. Even when they were relaxing back at the house. I howled when he snotted his grief in the packing his knives talking head. What a douchebag. I do hate returns. Even Stephanie by the end of N.O. annoyed me a bit. Last Chance Kitchen is something that should never have been. So not happy to see it return. Especially if it means Adam and his over earnest talking inspirational poster self might be back. Watching Blaising Douche crawl up the collective asses of the other judges at Whole Foods was rather funny. And sad. He practically begged Tom before parting those cheeks and hauling on board. But the best was his simpering "I'm part of the cool crowd now right,,,right" routine after Padma "pranked" him. I'm still waiting for that dish I want to crawl through my screen and devour to appear this season. Nothing so far. I can get on board Texas as the best season. At least in part. As a season it sucked balls. But despite being cast with a pool of contestants I think Paul could have still out cooked with only one hand and no vision, I found Paul's performance probably one of the most impressive in terms of dishes and demeanor of any season. His dishes were incredible week after week. It was like the top four of the Vegas season was rolled into one person.

For me it is the dancing. Yeah they are pregnant but they all and each seem to be trying to steal the scene. It just seems off. Plus I'd find non-pregnant women dancing like that just as stupid and trying way too hard.

I just saw the original with the ship and the scene with the grocery store is present as well.

Kandi has the power to shut Joyce down. Buy her all the houses and cars and keep her in men (because that man is a whore through and through to even spend five minutes with that disgusting pile of bile). But simply cut her out of the show. it is through Kandi that Joyce makes her heinous hideous self be known. The show could write a contract with Joyce but Kandi could simply refuse to be on camera with her. Kandi has a new husband, a daughter who is camera thirsty (there is a disaster waiting to happen) businesses and the ability to pretty much be involved with all the other cast members. She does not need the bitch with the broom all the way up her ass for story relevance. But instead she gives Joyce the validation by filming with her. And that is what the fuck Kandi could do if she truly wanted to. But she won't. And that speaks volumes. She is not simply respecting the old bat but she is validating what she admits is bad behavior. I hope Todd takes Kandi for one dollar more than every last dime Kandi can currently afford to buy Joyce wrinkled scrotums for her to bat around.

Curious. Do you know her current market share? She tried to get with Sears the same time the Kardashians did. Sears. I stand by my opinion and respect you to stand by yours. But I don't think that your opinion is anything but that. you aren't in her head and unless you know something the rest of don't, it seems clear the branding is off point. Otherwise this show would not exist. I have no idea what every young woman knows about DVF, but I don't think her brand is on top of anything in that market or really any market. It has prevailed. But that does not mean there aren't cracks. Perhaps serious. I don't think it demeans her achievements to think she might actually want to still have the level she once did. But I do think she is not deigning from the loftiest heights. This, in my opinion, is scrambling. Maybe she is still in sight of Fashion's summit. A look at the push back for investment less then ten years ago is telling though. Again. As is the show. This is not someone sitting in the halls of Olympus chuckling at the res to of the futile efforts of lesser beings. This is someone who got in bed with E! of all things and it remains how the morning after is going to turn out. But the walk of shame has already started in terms of the results of this poor thing. Ratings from the start would also suggest she isn't the pop culture powerhouse I think she thought. And maybe by your post you do as well. Again. I give massive respect to what she has accomplished. But I don't give her some kind of blanket that looks at this as something that doesn't reflect on her. At least in the manner I posted.

Yeah after looking up the full minute ad it does make more sense if a rather morbid one (which I'm wondering if that is why I've only seen the truncated version). The half minute ad also has two taglines. One that uses the minute version and another that voices over using the term ride which defeats the message since it is simply get home safe no matter how you do it. I wonder if PETA weighed in on cruelty to animals or something. Knowing how people think they probably also are still getting letters about how they left the poor dog to die after his owner was killed drunk driving ;)

My grandfather still swears they changed the formula when they "brought it back". His grandfather was some muckity muck at the company though right before he retired so maybe he is on to something. Then again this is the same man who voted for Ross Perot. Twice.

Yeah but its got to make anyone who ever ate a turkey burger wonder. Not sure which alcohol commercial it is. But it has the young guy getting home to an excited dog and he apologizes because he stayed the night instead of drinking and driving. The ad wants you "to make plans to get home". The implication here being that the guy screwed up. He should have made plans to get home that night. To which I say "I think you are muddling your messages here". Yes, as a dog owner myself, getting home to let the pooches out is a good thing. But to me the message is somehow that the guy not driving, not being dead, not taking out an innocent sober driver is still somehow wrong. Because scooping up a pile of dog poop or moping up some dog piss is such a bad thing. I don't look forward to it, but I pretty much figured out poop, piss and puke among other things come with having a dog. As frantic as my dogs can be in those moments when I get home much later than usual, I think, not to elevate my own self worth or anything, they would much prefer me being late than never.

Mohammed is one of the three men on the show who have ridiculously hideous hair. Ken of course is married to Lisa and he or someone he pays sneaks into the boarding school dormitories of, I'm guessing Scandinavian, young boys who have just sprouted their first set of pubes to snip and then shove a top his head with the help of a curry comb and hot glue. Martin is the second of the men. He apparently found the discarded collection of toupees for seventies game show hosts somewhere in a dumpster on the edge of Studio City. Oh yeah, he was fixed up with Kim one episode and shows up at every party the cast members throw. And when he runs out of events on the BH show he pops up on other BRAVO shows. Which brings us to Mohammed. He is the one wearing the dirty old mop. Not a strand of which moves no matter how he twists to stay in range of a RH camera. Not a strand moves even when the whole thing dances like the Big One just hit the San Andreas fault. Oh yeah. He was also married to Yolanda before she met her king with whom he has three kids and is Lisa's go to for large houses on little tiny lots and no furniture (seriously I get the whole Arab decor but when I grift in on the next party thrown by someone I don't know? a place to park my ass please) for her to throw parties or just attend for the show to illustrate how fabulous her lifestyle is.

My bad. I hate watching it online in the little segments because I then tend to read the articles in tandem. I mistakenly thought the two eyewitnesses were the ones the defense put forth as only seeing a person across the warehouse going toward the time cards and couldn't verify the time or really even the identity. i still think the investigation was fitting the facts to the story they wanted and not letting the facts speak on their own. I also think something was up by the fact the police kept saying he wasn't on their radar at first. Yet then the prosecutors talk about how all his co-workers thought he was acting odd. Really? In a brutal murder investigation wouldn't this odd have been mentioned right way? I have to wonder how much of the strangeness is applied hindsight. Like people who see a plane crash and swear they saw fire as the plane descends even though investigators determine no such thing. I'm not sure what my level of clarity would be if I was just a co worker let alone someone who was treated as a person of interest and then the suspect. There are many times i think I did something I do every single day but not in the order I normally do. But looking back I might think I did. Especially when the drama of a dead body imposes itself on your emotions and thoughts. i think the janitor is a bit weird, he lacks certain social polishing and awareness and likely was shady at least once in how he and his wife were working and getting paid. I still don't think he could have carried out the whole clean crime scene by himself and I still have an issue was to why the investigators followed certain a before b inference as sole fact without looking at the variables.

Lisa's shirts have buttons?! I think J.R. simply was suppose to serve as a reminder that men. cheat. on. Brandi. Nothing more than once again establishing her as some kind of victim so you can't blame her if she does something heinous. As usual. J.R. seemed hungry for the cameras so I think if he was involved with Brandi at all, he would have had lines and not just signed the waiver to show him long after the scenes were filmed. If he even did that. Note that Brandi was so relieved he wasn't with this woman but then ended with a snippy "but he's going home to her". If he actually lives with this woman, Brandi is either just as sleezy as her ex husband (yeah a shock I know) or she is deluded..(yeah a shock I know). My guess is she has texted him and he has replied with typical uninterested but in form with their past type of banter and maybe a flirty but completely innocuous "what's up" phone call and Brandi now thinks they are having phone sex. Or even more extreme, I wonder if he has been in contact with her at all in months and she was really stalking him and figured it would make for a great storyline for the show I'm pretty sure Mauricio belongs to a time share charter flight. And just to be snotty, that is not flying private. Flying private is when you own the jet or the person you are traveling with does. Or even better sent the jet for you. In terms of pulling back the curtain on the wealthy entertainment set, neither the Fosters or the Rinna-Hamlins bring it for me. I love Harry on Mad Men and even though one of my favorite shows, it is neither HIS vehicle and it is ending. Plus I think he is a bit warier than she is. Reading about their first reality foray and he seems to be just as stupid famewhorey as she is, but she seems to be the one who forges their path in that regard. It almost makes me miss Joyce. Simply because in a second season we might have seen more of her with her husband doing their own thing. Or his own thing. They might have been let go by the show, but I think he had the best potential for a real glimpse into the wealth of Hollywood. Probably he is too smart to have ever let that happen much though. Shiva seems to be making a real play to be a regular "friend". I'm kind of surprised Andy Cohen doesn't just make Mohammed pay him for a role. Sure Mo-mo lost tons in Dubai and/or Abu Dabi in 2009. But he might have recovered that. He's not great shakes in the international market much after his failed forays into Bangladesh. But still a couple hundred million is nothing any of us would sneer at let alone the hungry slavering likes of Lisa Vanderpump. I just don't understand why he doesn't just write a check for a couple of million and dangle it in front of Cohen's face. Well, write two checks for a million each so both eyes get the picture (yes that is sooo mean, for which I am thankful)

The 'season" went by too fast. Hopefully it will be back right after the holidays. As long as they are devoted to being five days past trending with their throwback Thursdays programming it does look like with the inexplicable return of Millionaire Matchmaker and the new Restaurant show, things are getting cluttered for the rest of year going into next. Thought this was a weaker episode. The Shark Tank segment should have just focused on the weeping weirdo. It just petered out with the second schiller. And if they are going to do a competitive show like that it shouldn't also be combined in the same week as The Voice and Dancing with the Stars. It ended with way too many boring contestant segments for an hour. I never realized how one note Catherine Heigl is. She is the new Jennifer Anniston. Now if only both would go away completely. That show looks all kinds of cheesey and on the other side of a chasm of disbelief so wide no way I can suspend anything over it. i forget what the one older woman with the short gray hair said in response to something, but it was the funniest moment of the show for me. That is not necessarily an indication of the show's entertainment as a whole for me last night. But it does say something. I need the yelling sisters to go away. The quiet dad is the only one to say anything interesting. And bed family is wearing a little bit. Love the Zenos. They were consistently funny the whole show.

Wow. Can Yolanda and David not act. Like at all. What a painful scene they contrived. And neither should think a career behind the cameras in in their future. They didn't even pretend to eat as David plucked full plates to take back downstairs when they were "done". What an awkward couple. And David? Learn a lesson many old men are going to have to sooner or later. Heck Tom Cruise hasn't yet. Stop spot adjusting your face. You think because you don't have a whole lift the tweaking isn't noticeable and we just think how great you look? Because getting that lower lid lift and implants that look like the ones Yolanda traded out for an upgrade just made you look like Jose Canseco and the Trivago guy somehow bred. Surely having people ask you 'how many bees stung you?!" should be a hint. Kyle? Many things I do not like about you. Child rearing never seemed one of them. Watch these episodes closely. Grow some self-awareness. Look at your sister. Do you really want to nurture your very own enfant terrible? Forget the dumbasses on social media that gush about Portia and realize you are the one who will have to clean up the mess if you don't adjust that child's entitlement that is creeping, no bursting, out the seams already. Lisa. Oh Lisa. Mohammed went through you to Shiva awithout you even realizing it. He's been "going through" you so much in terms of his little hootchie whos I'm thinking that walk of your's might be due something else. Ken in his jeans. I'm guessing he thinks if his picture is in every dictionary next to the entry for "Old Fart" he'll get some kind of residual? Because damn. I get he is all creaky but he and Lisa both seem to be white knuckling their teenage years with the clothes. And I'm not sure showing off the fact you have those Miss Kitty blouses designed for you, Lisa. Does she think there is some kind of Collins' sister money she can squeeze in on? Because if she is starting to look like Joan and Jackie's not so much younger long lost sister. The fact she is not Ken's contemporary simply stuns me this season. Brandi and Kim. No words. Except no more. This was like watching a montage of Keeping up with the Kardashian promos. if this is the type of "storyline" the show is going for added to the inclusion of Rinna and Davidson (who already know the value of a cheesey over worked scene) , the heavy handed (and incredibly dull and vapid) self-contrived Lisa and Yolanda scenes, I'm guessing somewhere the fork to stick in this franchise is being polished. And I only remember Rinna's bad reality show through The Soup and that show on VH1. But I'm pretty sure they worked the whole house is haunted thing to death already. Two episodes in and Rinna is already working my nerve with how eager she is for this. I'm guessing if she hadn't been cast she would have worn all yellow and dangled from one of Yolanda's trees. Or just stalked Mohammed.