Sofa Sloth

I don’t know how true this is but here goes anyway - I saw a post on a sister wives FB page from someone with a (loose lipped) friend who works at TLC (as a production assistant on shows LPBW and Sister wives). Friend confirmed that the majority drama is all contrived for TV and in particular that Meri’s neighbors never had any problem with her and the police call was fake, neighbors were nice and actually all signed releases for the storyline, something just fell through with Meri wanting that rental and so they manufactured the draaama. 🚨👮🏽‍♂️ The friend told her the adult Brown’s make $15,000 each adult per usual episode and up to $45,000 each individually for some (weddings? Births? Tell nothings?). She said they don’t actually struggle for money at all, but they like to appear they do for the show...

Probably the kids would go in scrounging for food in the cupboards and find them stacked with hair growth products. Seriously though, what’s the dill with Kodouch thinking he’s entitled to a giant section of the McMansion for just him? He already has a quarter share in the every section of the house and by the time they build it they’ll all be empty nesters anyway, so he won’t have to worry about being bothered by his ‘jerk’ offspring. He signed up this religion to justify his need to be with multiple women without it being classed as cheating or immoral in the eyes of god and went on to father umpteen kids to boost his own ego, the consequence of that decision is you don’t get alone time you knuckle-head. Suck it up and find a quiet bedroom at Meri’s to hang out in. She’s never home anyway 🙄

I’d be happy to oblige you! 😘

Recent posts showcasing Mariah’s ‘photography’ talent. The coffee one is especially amazing in both content and composition and could definitely not be taken on any old generic phone by just anyone! Give the girl an exhibition 😂👌🏼

Why is she posed like 92 year old homeless woman with a bad back and cigarette in hand, hobbling along looking for a dollar on the sidewalk? No offence intended to anyone who fits that description, but I don’t get the attraction of wanting to emulate that. Then again I’m not woke and use capital letters when I write, so what do I know? 🤷‍♀️ Anyway I can totally see why she’s so ‘tired and exhausted’, Dropping classes to go hang out on your mom’s Flagstaff mansion floor for a week or two and admiring yourself in old photos all day; phew that’s hard work!

Wow that’s quite surprising it’s gaining momentum! I personally think "passed away" “passed on” are much better euphemisms which are respectful to the deceased and considerate and somewhat comforting for the bereaved. It suggests that their loved one has gone to heaven (or whatever other afterlife they care to imagine). "Expired" seems to me a very blunt direct term for death, emphasises its finality and gives no hint of a continuation in the afterlife. It also sounds cold and dehumanising like the deceased person was just an object. Just my opinion anyway 🤷‍♀️ I just figured that’s pretentious, self-serving Dimitri all over, to use that term to describe his co-workers death. He has zero sensitivity or care for others feelings, Dimitri is all about Dimitri and maintaining his woke image.

Possibly, but the monstrosity he has planned is essentially just that anyway, only they are conjoined. Anyway, I was meaning mainly the carbon footprint of building an unnecessarily large house each, for one empty nester and four soon to be, combined with him fathering umpteen children into an over-populated world and now him wanting even more.

Christine can lose me with her foot-stamping ‘I won’t live together’ princess attitude. As stupid and unrealistic as Kodouch’s vanity project mega hotel is, It’s still SEPARATE self-contained soundproof apartments he’s presenting to them. They won’t share anything more than regular neighbors in an apartment block or duplex would and they’d probably see each other less than in the cul de sac compound, where all the house windows faced each other. While she’s always been an airhead, I can usually tolerate Christine more than the other adults, but she’s coming across more fake every season to me. It’s like she’s trying to erase the one big family aspect, that she claimed to love on old intro ‘I wanted the fambly, I didn’t just want the maaan’ and just wants Kodouch to visit her in her completely separate suburb where she can pretend she’s a monogamist. Why stay in plural marriage at all if you can’t even tolerate your sister wives as close neighbors? That all said, that house is absolutely ridiculous. Way too mega of a carbon footprint for a family that will soon barely have 4 kids at home. Also the fact that Kodouch is still thinking the world needs more of his crotch fruit in it, when he has 19 kids already, is self-serving and idiotic. The world is overpopulated and struggling to cope already you dick, you’ve contributed directly to that issue enough now. Get an environmental conscience and a clue! 🛑 ✋🏼

Color me shocked narcissist Mariah’s favorite thing to do is to gaze at pictures of herself adoringly. 👌🏼😁

I’m just laughing at this, wondering what other plyg fam would want to take on her dour, narcissistic ass as a wife (or sister wife)? She really is such an unlikable woman and we see just a tv edit version - I can’t even fathom how horrendous she is to actually live with, or deal with (or be tied to for all eternity!) No wonder the family always looks miserable and needs so much therapy - being around that whiny-sucker-of-joy black cloud constantly would do that to you. Kody is a hapless, showboat twat-waffle moron and Meri is a raging, manipulative, stank-attitude, full-blown bitch. They definitely deserve each other as spouses. Personally I’m just rooting for them to get it together again 😆

Maybe she’s going to be a ‘photographer’ now. Check out this extra Instagram account I found. Wellness blogger, social justice warrior, chef, influencer, yoga instructor, MLM participant, lululemon retail worker and now add ‘photographer’ to her resume - whatta accomplished gal!

What? alcohol every night! 🍷 I thought it was a ‘tenant’ (thanks Robyn for butchering tenet many a time) of their faith, that they didn’t drink the devil’s juice? Remember when the sister wives organised a (for tv purposes only) girls trip to San Fran to buy commitment ceremony dresses, (then left empty- handed, with only the sludge brown 70’s carseat vinyl for Meri’s ‘edgy dress’ and a grand scheme of ruining a newly graduated dress-maker’s career publicly by giving her 4 hideous frocks to make on an unrealistic deadline) - so yeah that trip, they order drinks from the pub at lunch and then get upset at the bartender for serving them a full glass each as it’s intended, and we get the holier-than-thou speech of: ‘oh no we don’t drink alcohol! It is a tenant of our faith...yardy yar...We are not heathens! We would only EVER try a sip!’ (Uh so get one to share and don’t order 4 separate drinks next time you wasteful morons? You share a peen on a regular rotation but you can’t share a glass? 🤯) Anyhow I digress... my point was, they seem to have left all sense of pretending to be moral and holy, waaaay back in season 2. Now Christine openly admits slugging wine at night, we saw Meri drinking with her catfish buddy previous seasons, Janelle’s made a reference to drinking in the most recent episode - if their church was legit they’d surely have excommunicated them by now for all their frowned-upon public fuckery.

Let me just fix this pic again for you old Mare... #unfilteredremake #fakenews #thatsnotyou #youhavethighsremember #stopovereditingyourpics #getreal #yourrealfaceisnot30 #noonewantstojoinyourpyramidscheme #theyalsodontwantyouroverpricedrags #noonesbuyingit #stopbleedingthebeastwithyourfans #youhavenomorals #getarealjob #lularoeisnotacareer #tviswhyyouaresuccessful #youaremisleadingfans

I think some of the boys (in particular Paedon, Gabe, Garrison and Hunter) have had their unfair share of shitty edits and storylines. I feel for all of them, with many situations in their sensitive teen years that should have been kept private, being broadcast to the world, as their idiot parents sold them out...Times like when they referred to Hunter as a ‘raging testosterone monster’ and made his (perfectly normal) difficult adjustment to Robyn’s (and Solomon’s) entry to the family into an unflattering storyline, Garrison and Gabe’s car park scuffle and the subsequent over-the-top televised dismay and discipline from Gabe’s ‘lying’ that followed, (along with the countless other times those boys have been insinuated as family bullies and brutes picking on Robyn’s angel babies), Gabe’s and Paedon’s raw emotions and distraught tears televised, with both ridiculous and unnecessary moves... so many examples of how these middle child boys in particular, have been sacrificed and character assassinated by their parents for the sake of a storyline and a quick buck. No wonder Logan, Garrison and Paedon have basically hightailed it straight off camera and away from the spotlight as soon as they were able in search of a normal existence. Hopefully Gabe gets to do to the same ASAP.

Yeah sure, except the tabloids probably want to use a realistic pic that is actually you, that you didn’t run the Facetune and skinny filter over first. Here, I fixed your post for you old Mare. #noYOUREwelcome

This. 👆🏼There is always an undercurrent of resentment and intolerance in all her ‘motherhood is hard’ posts. It’s almost like she’s always shaming her children, for just doing what toddlers and babies do and It sure comes across ungrateful. How nice that her little bub wants to touch her and be near her and that she’s privileged enough, she gets to stay home and experience that with her kids! It’s fleeting and one day she’ll miss it, but instead of living in the moment and taking in her bubba’s little chubby hands lovingly stroking her, she’s on her smartphone taking selfies to complain to the masses about it - ‘here we go again’. Eyeroll. Yes Maddie we all get it and most women have been there, motherhood can be thankless and relentless and you make sacrifices, but you chose that life. You chose to leave college, get married at 19 and pop out babies young, so develop some emotional maturity already and suck it up. Your life is not about you and your wants anymore. I’m so tired of seeing her negativity, immaturity and whiny self-absorbed attitude towards motherhood.

Managed to see a bit of this thanks to an AMAZING person who uploads on YouTube. ‘Kicked out’ phhffftt! These people and their perceived persecution. It’s really getting old. 🙄 The producers probably manufactured that whole ‘kicked out’ storyline because the Brown’s have literally nothing else going on to talk about. How convenient the neighbors ‘didn’t want to be on camera’. Even if it was truthful - firstly, well good for the neighbors! I’d feel the same if my quiet, unassuming, culdesac was taken over by a circus of obnoxious and entitled wannabe celebrities, filming their D-grade reality show. Secondly Meri openly admitted she was leaving by choice not because she was ‘kicked out’. She just couldn’t wait for an excuse to hightail it out of Kermit’s lime green lair and back to her (amazingly still furnished) bland Vegas McMansion where she could absolve herself of having to dill with the family, but still film for money. The Kody mantra of ‘where we go one we go all’ clearly doesn’t apply to his family members he doesn’t care for, as if he really lived by it and he and old Mare were genuinely ‘married’, no husband would consider that a reasonable solution. These relationships are such a farce for filming purposes, it’s actually laughable that they think their audience is that dumb. Also the language on them and Kody’s bum display on the couch and flipping people off the last few seasons... For all their ‘modesty standards’ and ‘high morals’ and ‘we believe god doesn’t want us too... (insert normal human behavior here) - 🙄 Sure Jan. I remember when they were chastising Logan ‘for using language they don’t like’ and now look at them. The last few seasons have shown more and more they are hypocritical fakers who were putting on a farce of I’m holier-than-thou in the beginning.

She’s such a patronising twerp. I wouldn’t take a lecture from anyone seriously, if they can’t even use capital letters when delivering it. 🙄 As usual we get her serious condescending lecture alongside a cheesy, squinty-eyed, narcissistic picture of her wokeness herself (which fits neither the tone or context of her message). I figure her thought process is to regurgitate the thoughts of other woke folx to impress them while also lording herself above those that disagree (see how much more intelligent, woke and forward-thinking I am), then pairing it with a conceited picture of herself to gain the likes and ‘you’re so beautiful and carefree’ comments from sycophants who care nothing of the lecture but want to fan girl her...either way both tactics serve only to gain compliments, to fuel her massive ego. It literally achieves nothing else of purpose.

New season doesn’t start in Australia on TLC until April this year ☹️ I’ll be relying on these recaps until then for my Brown family snarking, so thanks in advance to those that take the role on!

Just recently rewatched a rerun of that episode and felt so awful for Day’un as she described his existence as ‘the biggest mistake of her life’ in front of everyone in the family and on international tv. All the pearl clutching, crocodile tears and hand-wringing about the regret for not saving her ‘Puuuuritty’ (for the man who has 3 other wives) while she insinuated her ex was a horrible sexual predator and portrayed herself as a poor chaste good girl; an innocent victim duped - Bitch please! 🙄 If her ex was truly that awful, I’m not sure why she’d go on to marry the guy and pop out two more kids with him. The cookie reference was on a different episode I also watched recently, (season after I think) they were giving a parental talk to the teenagers on abstinence when dating?

‘This blazer is everything’ Everything? Sooo - Cheap and flimsy? Three sizes too small for you? Hugh Hefner’s old dressing gown? Nan’s couch cover? A theater curtain? Yes Mare, it IS definitely everything, (though not in the ‘cool kid’ definition of the word you were aiming for). Add me to the pile of those who find her obsession with Blair what’s-his-face weird and possibly inappropriate for a middle aged ‘married’ woman. I’m sure she’s transferring all her spousal love and affection to him as a ‘bff’ as Kody’s obviously done throwing a night in the rotation schedule her way and he’s a safe target of her affection to flirt with, but I’d love to know what’s in it for him! 😆 he’s probably wondering ‘how do I shake this crazy off?’

She can’t filter TLC lenses though... I admit, I find it curious she goes to so much effort to drastically alter and facetune her online pictures, when we see unfiltered old Mare on TV regularly. It seems a bit delusional and desperate to want to portray such a fake image of yourself, especially when your real face and body is easily accessed by a quick google search or just turning on the tv 😆

Thank you Sandy!💓 It’s truly devastating. A nightmare for the poor families and wildlife impacted and all the volunteer firefighters putting themselves in harms way every day to try and get these fires under control (while the government sits on its hands watching and our prime minister takes holidays in Hawaii I might add 🙄). I’m in Queensland and we’ve got terrible air quality and we are in extreme drought conditions, but hoping for some Christmas miracle rain hopefully! 🤞🏼

She really does. It’s quite something. She must have been so fun for her half-siblings to have around growing-up, as essentially she’s a quintessential stereotypical ‘spoilt only child’ but in a large family dynamic. We see her older siblings all trying to deal with her rank personality at times during the show. It’s interesting to me she seemingly hasn’t developed coping skills beyond childhood and instead has decided to justify the self-absorbed way she behaves in adulthood too. I would guess that’s a direct reflection of Meri and her indulgent ‘All hail Mariah, my only golden child can do no wrong’ parenting style, combined with that inherited narcissistic trait. My 6 year old has so much more resilience now than Mariah will ever have 😆

‘Sit in it a little longer, Feel that shit a little longer’ These eloquent wise words brought to you, by the girl who spent a whole Christmas ruining her family’s joy while sulking in a vehicle alone, staring at an empty house. Also the same girl that spent her entire life melting down about Meri not giving her a full biological sibling and tantruming in the bathroom at king Solomon’s announcement. The same girl that also wallowed in self pity and rage about Meri betraying HER by getting catfished, for over a YEAR... Feeling your feelings is absolutely fine and good, however there are many times when you also need to be resilient and mature, and dill with your fillings in an appropriate way for the occasion, because sometimes it’s not all about you! Color me shocked Mariah the narcissist doesn’t support this concept.🙄