snarkish

Destinie looks like a toddler colored on her with a pack of Sharpies.

Is my bourbon cream kicking in or did Kristianna just proclaim mad BJ skills?? And wanting some d*ck? FWIW, bourbon cream does not fare well as a "verp". 🤮

Shawn. You have how many children and Destinie is the "love of your life"? You are a flaming bag of shit.

Chanda and her smug little Tatum O'Neil looking face. PHO-nee!

THIS!!! (BTW, I love your writing style, @TrininisaScorp!) So many couples that can't manage their small children think a kitten or a puppy is a good idea to add to the madness! So to add to the c-section banter, I had two (and 11 years apart from each other), and I told both OB's that I would do advertising on a billboard for them afterwards. In fact, I was scared to actually deliver vaginally. My second one went more smoothly than the first (as that one was planned ahead of time), but I still couldn't imagine a room full of company after surgery, especially after waking from general anesthesia. Although, after several hours in the recovery room, I did have both sets of grandparents, husband, and my eldest child in the room to meet baby. I actually felt pretty damn good, but I attest that to the spinal block followed by high dose Toradol. And, as far as bonding goes, both my kids were practically surgically attached to me (the 13 year old "baby" still is) so the whole "not bonding correctly" idea is horse shit. Kenny continues to disappoint me. If you don't understand the word "hola" then you shouldn't even visit Mexico. I agree on the BS as he liked to brag about the amount of times he vacationed there, so, yeah. And again, team Truffles! I view their episodes now just to see that sweet old toot. Melyza and her Mom with their resting bitch faces! Each episode Melyza's eyelids are heavier and heavier (and the eyeliner is not helping). I have to say, Tim (to me) seems like an amicable oaf. He's done way more than these other idiots who don't bother learning language and customs. I think he'd do much better with a local gal and if the Latina look excites him, he's in Texas so a nice gal of Mexican descent, maybe? I feel like Brittany should be hung by her ankles by her ridiculous wig. She's playing with fire and deserves consequences. And I visibly recoiled at her even holding that precious baby. Yazoo is an idiot but he doesn't deserve what she's doing to him, IMO. As for her annoying cringe/speak, my daughter speaks more clearly and moves her mouth better following an Orthodontic adjustment AND wearing her rubber bands. I think it's a horrible habit she inherited from her Dad. Glad for the Jenny/Smeeet break. I've been jonesing Indian food something awful anyway so that would have just added fuel to the curry-induced fire.

I have noticed this from the beginning. His pupils are always like pinpoints, he's always looking sweaty and flushed. DEAD!!! 🤣🤣🤣

I'm not sure I'll hold out this season, because Oliver was on my last nerve from the first episode. Kind of like a male version of Darcey Silva for me. How many Daniel Boone outfits does he manage to model in two episodes...did he arrive with a steamer trunk?? His attitude towards the rest is shit too. As others stated, Andrew and Jennifer can bugger off if they don't like Adam's work, he's done more than the others. Evan and Christine spend the most time sipping hot beverages by the fire like they're camping. Not sure what they will contribute at all. Gerrid might be useful. Wonder why they didn't incorporate Grouse into the meal plan, instead of depending on just the salmon, bear and moose? Seems like those would be easier targets? Granted each Grouse isn't going to offer a lot of meat, but I would think the more variety of meats, the better. I was wondering how the Alone cast were going to wind up health wise, depending on one form of sustenance long term (such as fish or rabbits only).

Thanks for creating this! Now that Alone is finished, we were sad. Although, some of these peeps are already on my nerves, mostly, OLIVER. Even Mr. Snarkish feels he's too slick and his leathers look too new. After having basically grown up in a hunting gear store, he thinks his gear looks all for show. He has an attitude like Roland though. Think he's going to be a problem. Jennifer...eyeliner. Really? Not sure what Evan is going to contribute here. Working in a Sporting Goods store and being and Eagle Scout doesn't automatically cut one out for this type of thing. And deciding to go back to base camp because he was wet and cold isn't a good sign. I am now craving salmon for dinner.

I find Stacey to be the prettier twin. There's something very unattractive to me about Darcey's pinched-looking snout. Stacey appears a bit "softer" and not as "severe" as Darcey in the face. The both of them though, are a carnival side show. Darcey's daughters really have to be appalled by them. Having a 13 year old daughter myself, basically breathing or speaking annoys and embarrasses teen daughters. And I feel they pic the most unattractive men. Florian, Jesse and Tom are just so creepy. Dying to know more about their ex-husbands and the whereabouts of Stacey's kids..because, I have no life. And I enjoy sending Mr. Snarkish out of the room.

I apologize, I thought it was earlier intended there was issues with Armando coming to the US, so Kenny went to Mexico. Maybe I misunderstood.

I think the best thing the translator app ever helped translate was Jihoon saying he is new to being a Father. As much of a shlump as he is, you cannot throw a person into Fatherhood like that who has never even been around children. He hasn't even been around his OWN infant enough, nevermind a 3-5 year old monster-child! I have never seen Deavan make any sort of loving gesture towards him at all, I am thinking getting knocked up might have been the only time? And, Elicia, give the fucking translator a break and take a damn breath and hit the "send" button instead of trying to record a diatribe that doesn't come out right. Idiot. In a month's time, Brittany will not be converting to Islam and having her Father arrive, or will be divorced. Why she's scamming this family is beyond me. She SHOULD be scared. I personally think Armando and Hannah should have waited until being able to come to Florida. It's really not THAT far from Mexico! Or how about if Kenny moved to California or Arizona and they moved up there? If Kenny could make the few day trip to drive, they could come visit Armando's family. Although I agree with others that maybe a different more gay-accepting city in Mexico might have been a better choice. I'm over watching Areola...she needs to just go home with Janice.

Please pardon me, I had to go gargle with Scope to get the bile taste out of my throat after watching SKANKinee straddle Stubble-Lip-Flipper-Teeth and suck his face off while in her TH describing her jailhouse girlfriends. And Shawn with his blank stare saying he's going to give it to her hard....AAAGH! And gee, those teeth didn't give away she's a thumb sucker at ALL. Quaylandria's wig looks like a black mop head. Quaylon's dreds make him look like a battering ram. WTH did Shovel put in the flutes...hooch?? Jessica looking all uncomfortable in the corner at Maurice's daughter's house...all I can think of is the old Sesame Street song, "One of these things is not like the other...one of these things just doesn't BEEE-LONG!" Hanging out with the Compton Crips, she looks ridiculous at Roni's place. Why do people who evidently live comfortably and have normal lives, have the desire to hang out with those that don't? Is it somehow exciting? Something tells me she leads a boring life and has an office cubicle job she probably doesn't like and and is looking to live on the wild side and shock her parents. Scott acting all puffed up behind his desk making speakerphone calls...I swear he must work selling used cars. His hands gross me out too, fingers like freckled sausages that match the sausage under his nose. DEAD over the comments about Tyrice's "casket suit"! What's with no Kristianne and John, and still nothing on the new couple?

Okay, so I was impressed that they are so organized and involved with the kids. Mom seems to try to get teaching moments in everywhere. Dad seems to enjoy the simple stuff like cooking and home haircuts. However, there seems to be something almost "too slick" about him. And the money management lessons he's having the little ones spout seems odd too. I did like the fact that they underlined in a TH that they'd have as many as "they could provide for adequately". But the thing that is bothering me mostly is that Karen is having bedrest issues with every pregnancy. With 11 small children at home already, you cannot go stay in the hospital for 8 weeks with each subsequent pregnancy! This is something that God or whoever is trying to tell her that she's had enough! This is also the problem I had with the Duggars, after they lost the baby before Josie, and then Josie wound up as a micro preemie. It's time to stop when a normal healthy pregnancy isn't in the cards anymore! It cannot be good for her body to carry that many multiple pregnancies anyhow. A Dr. recently told a female friend of mine with a newly discovered heart murmur (she is late 40's, with 5 children, last two being twins), that "many women have slight heart murmurs from pregnancy that they aren't even aware of, from the stress of carrying the pregnancies." Not sure if that is truth or not, but it seems legit.

I watched this episode via Pillow Talk, because I need the humor and comments of the PT cast to get me through this otherwise boring season. Just get Brittany off my screen, please. That "WHUT??!" reaction of having to convert for marriage. Girl, WTF were you thinking? This is nothing but a game for her. I can't with her father-inherited constant, painful smile, llama lashes, and way of speaking like her braces were applied yesterday. I think Yazoo is done with her arguing and disappearing, so he decided to tell her whatever she wanted to hear. She doesn't have forever to decide, he just said it to shut her up. The same goes for moist, ruddy Cheese Dick. He has to confess to the Father his infidelity? And does Melyza ever have a facial expression beyond "blank"? In my cold, black heart I did love the proposal, but I couldn't believe Kenny's daughters appeared ALREADY! Yes, I agree with others, what with all those teary goodbyes?? And Kenny, quit pressuring Armando about his folks! His Dad needs to digest everything, he just learned that his son is gay, and moving away with his Granddaughter to be with a man. I wouldn't be spurting the engagement news at their first meeting. I've decided that Deavan looks like one of those Charlie McCarthy puppets with the lines going from mouth to jaw. Or a really bad, knock off Wednesday Addams. Something is fishy (excuse the Korean pun) about the much nicer apartment. And if the reason everyone is "finished" with Jihoon now is because he swatted Dracula, well sorry, she deserved a pop on her ass for running off as far as I am concerned. (*Dodges flying tomatoes from those that don't agree with spanking*). He is not an instant Father to this child, who obviously has been allowed to run amok like a damn monkey. I cracked up at Mama Jihoon's delight when hearing she should back off! LOL Thank you for the break from Areola and Jenny!

If he's 48, then I'm a monkey's Uncle. I am 52 and look like his baby sister. Although, I have to say, most of the guys who I went to high school with look like my Father now. So there's that. I'm sorry, dating someone the same age as your child is creepy. When I was in the dating world again when I was in my early 40's, for fun I went on two dates with a guy that was 30. My son (age 16 at the time) was WIGGED OUT, hence why it ended at 2 dates, although it was fun (but definitely not something I'd consider long term, ESPECIALLY if the kids are uncomfortable!) People were discussing Shawn's upper lip previously (what's with lips this season?), so I made sure to hone in on that this episode. I think his "mustache" is the culprit, it looks like lighter hair than his head, and also looks like stubble. Also his nose is always red like he just came in from the cold. I had to cackle at "What" when Destinie's sister asked his age. Like you couldn't hear the question dude...what a liar move. I know Mississippi airports probably are pretty small compared to ATL Hartsfield that I am used to, but there was NOBODY there. I thought it was hysterical that Scott went home with cold steak and a limo bill. Maurice does remind me of Shane. And Jessica a knockoff Lacey, minus the kids and lip injections. Color me surprised that Kristianne went through with the nuptuals. I guess she was figuring WTH, we can divorce/annul later. I gotta get to my damn parole! I was surprised she was vaping and not full on smoking in the truck. I feel the need to clear my throat when listening to her talk.

Roland grosses me out every episode to no end. I have to watch between my fingers when he comes on. I am glad I had already eaten before watching. But I agree, props for him using every bit of the animal. This blooming idiot would want to pet the wolves. "HERE DOGGY DOGGY!" I know they must be super dangerous, especially a pack, but all I could think of was "Oooh...pretty" while looking at them. And as others have stated, here are the two ladies pulling through to the end! Callie busting her face and smiling. Kielyn getting her feelings out and moving on and dancing a jig over her trout. Since we're 9 episodes in and down to 4 participants and barely halfway through the challenge, methinks we'll be wrapping up soon. I can't see them going another 50 days with the snow/ice just really kicking in and with barely enough fish and meat.

Currently watching this episode On Demand and catching up, excited to say hello to my peeps from the 90DF forums! *waving* John and Kristianne: I actually know a female version of him (minus the multiple marriages and kids). He probably has a lot of Indian wind chimes and prints of wolves around his home. Kristianne is working that smoker's laugh, and those blue shorts look like she was about to deliver the mail or coach volleyball. What an oddball couple. Limo driver looks straight out of Goodfellas. And his face as he's parking the limo and getting out of the car was priceless! Suck in all that sage or whatever's being burned. Maurice and Jessica: OMG, her quivering, annoying voice...like she's on the verge of crying. Unfortunately for her, she looks just like her Dad. Sort of a Lacey and Shane, but not quite. This to me is all about shocking her family being with a bad boy. And her wanting the big D. I vote she gets knocked up pronto. Remember, he wants Bay-BEEZ. Scott and Lindsey: Here we got with Scott and Lizzie all over again, but with a sweet, young, innocent child. His lip CONSUMES me, I cannot look away. I've even tried Googling WTF is wrong with it. It does look very red/irritated and swollen. I am not thinking cleft lip, that normally looks much different. Lindsey seems awful smooth and "too pretty"...almost like a planted actress. 50K to decorate that house?? I vote he's wiped out his savings/401K too since he drives that semi-crappy pickup. Not exactly what an "entrepreneur" or whatever he's supposed to be. Although he reminds me of a sales manager in a car dealership or a high school principal. Love Lindsey's "red, white and blue" face in her TH on the phone in prison laying on the makeup thick. Shawn and Destinie: I want to smack this asshole. SIX children, and shopping in a thrift store with his baby mama, and telling her all this shit about how he's going to marry a prisoner he's never met. YES, spend that cash on your SIX children! I hope Destinie is a "flight risk" and takes off so he owes the court 50K. I just want to kick him in his drugstore upper dentures. Cold tacos in a purse?? Shavel and Quaylon: All I hear is "shovel" and "quaalude". And, OMG, the Mom's name..."Qualandria"?? You can't make this shit up. Shavel is just gullible and not very smart. Mom's gold makeup and red wig was...interesting. Otherwise this couple is a bit Yawnsville. Tyrice and Chanda: I've got nuttin' on these two outside of WTH was he shopping for her to wear?? I think all he's interested in his her big booty.

Go, Ladies! Surprised they surpassed the two military dudes. Callie continues to surprise me. She has a awesome attitude and seems to be having a great time, her head is in the right place. She hasn't complained of loneliness or fatigue. Scary about Mark's health! I keep thinking that a diet based only on fish or rabbits can really do a body in over time, and you have to be concerned about parasites of what the rabbit/porcupine/squirrel might already have onboard, no? When there is no balance to the diet, and you're in it for this long, I totally see health issues cropping up, especially also dealing with extreme cold and having to keep warm. I agree with the previous poster who said they should have started it earlier and give them a chance to build a better shelter and or gather more food before the Winter hit. I had to giggle a little bit at Amos yelling at the fox, "See? You don't listen!" That would be me, talking to my pets. I do like him, and am thinking that he and Callie are who I am rooting for now. Not that sorry to see Joe go, he always seemed a bit grumpy, even the wind bothered him. I think Kielyn will last an episode or two more and then tap. I don't think she can handle the isolation much longer. Odd that no show of Roland, who I believe has been in every episode thus far. But my stomach needed a break from him for sure. I think we're going to have more tap outs per episode now. We are on episode 8 and barely at the halfway mark. Wondering if anyone will make it 100 days.

OMG, so I'm not the only one who couldn't stand the way Dawn was dragging out the word "wrong"! She's so full of crap, she knows exactly what she's doing. Her and her hubby have a very strange dynamic going on. I can see him "selling surgery" to a patient and he seems to carry over his patient talking finesse to his wife or something. That house they live in with the armor outside (and this is coming from someone with a smallish medieval armor in my living room - his name is Fred), and the painting of her and the poses of the "medical clan", are just tacky, tacky, TACKY. Baby Belle DEFINITELY looks exactly like Jared, and I find this hilarious and fulfilling at the same time. I thought Brittani looked HORRIBLE. She's definitely not bikini material. She has not butt, no waist, she just presents as dumpy in whatever she wears. And now she has that telltale "I had a tummy tuck" stretched belly button that looks like a button hole. I've also realized that Mary's face reminds me of a mouse wearing makeup. I think Miguel needs to cut his losses and run. The looks he gives and his body language smack of just being very uncomfortable. Sarah really only wants to have a relationship with Laurie and a dachshund she can share with her Mother. I get the not wanting children, but for the reason of not wanting to disrupt that relationship seems like an odd reason for not wanting kids. Not exactly sure what she's doing with Miguel in the first place. I was honestly surprised at GPHG's "news". I thought she was going to say that SunME was moving in with them. Yeah, the abrupt change in SunME's demeanor shows just how fake this show really is. Yet we continue to watch weekly, like programmed lab rats. Call me shallow, but I noticed GPHG needed a fill in, who goes on a vacation/cruise without getting your nails done prior? LOL!

I was glazing over during this episode (I just moved last Wednesday, and am in the throes of unpacking and exhausted) but will rewatch today via Pillow Talk, complete with requisite tv snacks. Kenny & Armando: I am wondering since their story has been so drama free thus far, they were asked by production to throw a hitch into their story a bit with Kenny acting sort of the Grumpy Grandpa Ugly American and also wanting PDA. He really cannot be this dense. South Florida is a very different climate when it comes to accepting gay lifestyles and he has to understand that. MahLEEZA & CheeseDick: I like this chick, but I don't like the fact that she is going to hold the cheating over his head forever. She's smart, attractive, appears to have her schmidt together, just move on to another American (if that's what she wants) if you don't feel you can trust him. Areola & Baby Cool: I took a bathroom break on this one, tired of the constant forced smile on her face and Janice marching around inspecting things while Bini looks nervous. However, bring me some coffee and popcorn. Deavan & Joony: I did like how happy and behaved Druscilla appeared at the market. Although it looked hot as balls there and everyone sweaty. Deavan needs to stick that translator up her ass. My husband was chortling over how they have a child together but need an electronic device to have a conversation. This affair seems to be way past over, but they're milking it through this season for the TLC paycheck. Yazoo & Beyonce: This is where I started losing consciousness, after the gratuitous Uncle kissing. Will have to rewatch but honestly I think this pair is a joke at this point and just a TLC fabrication for more followers for her. I appreciated the break from the ongoing saga of "Where are the divorce papers??!"

I got up to putter around during Jenny and SomeMeat's portion. It's just the same thing over and OVER, season after season. Don't give a flip about them anymore. I prefer to watch the cows wandering the streets. I love Mama Jihoon. Especially the way she deadpans everything. Basically "stop blubbering and man up". Although, she's most likely the reason why he's the way he is today. Ahh, shit. Here we all go getting disappointed in the Kenny/Armando romance relief we've needed. I agree with others though, Kenny was/is most likely tired and overwhelmed. But, I already called the diva factor previously, when I saw where he was living in Florida and how much hair products he needs. I'm disappointed he didn't even learn the currency exchange, or how to order and understand basic Mexican dishes. Also, kudos to the guy sitting nearby at the restaurant! I'm just glad we didn't have to wait until the end of the episode to see it. Seeing the pics of Melyza and Tim, he seems to have gained a significant amount of weight. Only thing I recognized in the pics of them together were his ruby red lips. I don't get the attraction either. Even she mentioned something about being surprised about being with a "White guy". She seems articulate and level-headed. I like that Madre Melyza doesn't give two shits that he left his home country for her and "that's the least he could do". I'm confused about the apartment with Brittany and Yazoo. So, he did the romantic gesture with the rose petals on the bed, but they cannot boom boom in private there until they are married? They either just need to have long-distance flings or he needs to move to the US. Not gonna work any other way, but again, this is all fabricated drama and she's probably already back home leading the twerk life.

I never watched their seasons (David/Annie/Molly/Cynthia) and I love them ALL on Pillow Talk! Especially Annie with "Boom boom!" and the catty girl talk, Southern-drawl style. I live not awfully far from Molly, and have posted previously that I'm trying to talk my daughter into getting a bra fitting at her lingerie shop when this situation clears up!

I didn't need to hear about Alena's one night stand either, Marcia. I finally figured out why Sun-ME doesn't smile often. I feel this is the first episode where we actually saw her teeth, and she has a rather ugly smile, IMO, and looks like it's not a facial expression she's comfortable with. I agree with the PP's...her hobbling along like she is the one who just had a tummy tuck, wobbling into the office to hear about her scan results. She actually looked mad that the results were normal! And waiting another episode for the "news" from Maxi Purple Hair...I have a feeling it's involving all 3 of them living together. Sarah wine-drunk and spying on her Mom. I like when Miguel remarked, "So is that all you did today?" I'm pretty sure she worked on that bottle quite a bit too before you got home. I actually thought about investing in one of those things during this COVID situation while my daughter would be home alone (age 13) and doing digital learning while I have to go into work for a few hours. TBH I think they can bring great peace of mind for those needing to check on kids, elderly, pets, etc. but of course Sarah is going to watch Laurie like she's an Instagram feed. I continue to love the goombah family. They are my people, but on several notches higher. You could tell this episode it's all good fun, especially Carlo fake threatening to throw Kathy off the bed. Speaking of Kathy, please, don't do duck lips for the camera...you have no lips. If anyone whacks Mary on the back of her head, her face is going to roll up like a window shade. My GOD, her eyes! And eyeliner after or during an eye procedure? Yeah, Chinese food is the best idea after having abdominal surgery...NOT. Glad for the break from the human Muppets. Dawn's mouth is so wide and showing even her molars when smiling, that she really does resemble a Muppet.

I agree with this. This episode with Roland and the ox disturbed me very much, I had to FF, I could not watch that. I don't care about that "disclaimer" about how they are "following hunting guidelines"...that was no where near a humane kill. Of course, my husband argued that that was what might happen in "cave man days" when all you had was a knife or a single arrow...still. What disturbed me even more was that Roland seemed a bit more animated in the after show, most likely because of his prized kill. The licking of the blood and eating the raw meat showed me this dude is all about making others uncomfortable.

@TwirlyGirly: if you need a new best friend, I'm here! I agree 100% with everything you wrote! For those of us who didn't get online/internet until we were around age 30, I think we appreciate MORE the ability to research anything that comes to our head that we'd like to know. I'm often told I "over-research" things (like vacations, items I wish to purchase, the weather, health topics, I could go on). This is what surprised me about Laura, that she was close to my age and didn't think/Google what her life would be like with Aladin. I also agree on Brittany's mouth! It's like the braces/teeth are too large and she's talking around them, or she has the habit of her Father and often smiling while speaking.