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Out of all the possible choices, Kristina decided screen printing celery was a good idea. So, she has no room to judge. Ever.

I had hope for this season. And they’ve slowly died under the crack smoking judges propping up their chosen ones. I hope I’m wrong, but they could make the Chastity fix a bit less obvious. The singing, the judge’s saving her when outfits are falling apart, the tons of camera time, there’s no way that dated mess of a dress was the winner in any real competition. Coral can go too. And take dead eyed Kristina with her. I’m hate watching at this point. Aaron’s Star Trek 60’s costume for the space alien olympics was tragic, but if it was sewn by one of the chosen ones, it would have been safe. And that’s a damned shame.

Why are people still annoyed that Lauren didn’t do calendar? Even if I had a banging body, I wouldn’t want to be crawling around on all fours on the sand wearing the equivalent of two bandaids and a cork saying “pruuunnee” while some skeeve called me honey and sweetie. Obviously TPTB had zero issue with it. Seems to me she made the right choice.

So, Aaron created costumes for a winged monkey in a Wizard of Oz play and now he’s an expert? K. Bones had TWO looks in the top 3 in the first episode, so he might actually know something. Aaron got personal and really nasty. If he’s pissed at the judges because he thinks they’re ignoring his fabulousness, then go yell at them. Glad they pulled the stick out of his back end to prop up that stupid hood. And shut up Anna. Kristina should have gone home. I hate group challenges, the person with immunity can send dog crap down the runway and not care. And Octavio can follow her. Has he made anything that hasn’t been garbage bag inspired?

The funeral dirge playing for Shan was a bit much. Maybe editing will miss her, but I won’t. Loved her getting offended at DeShawn wanting to actually play the game. She can take her humming back to her church and explain to the congregation about how she listens to them but does what she wants to do. Glad the bottom feeders woke up to knowing where they stood. I actually liked Ricard tonight. It’ll probably change back to indifference next week. 😂

Project Ruffle sucks this year. Either they’re crying, or bitching, or designing for Clown College, or spending the $ on outfits for themselves. I’m so sick of ruffles, tents with curtains sewn on, and wonky hems. Is the tablecloth fabric section the only part of Mood that’s open? As a woman with, um, “love handles”, I wanted to slap Chastity for showcasing her model’s. Coral’s partner made a hat that was totally hidden, out her in the bottom for that. Octavio left Katie and went to the avant garde ring of the circus. DD saved that outfit. Was fitting they made a hat big enough for Oct’s head. Anna made something gorgeous, and was safe? How? Why does Nina have a fan on her to blow her hair around during critiques? Is it to blow away the crack pipe smoke? That’s all I can figure with this season’s “winning looks”.

I’m shocked that Ava screwed up again. Shocked. 🙄 In other breaking news that’s very hard to believe, water is wet and Judy sits on a stool. Was Megan part of the makeover club? She could totally benefit for a darker hair color. Bye Alora. You treated this like a real job and not the sisterhood of the traveling boot. Hope you have a fabulous life, despite not making the Rockettes.

There’s no way in hell Queen Tara and Johnny Fabulous are wearing the winning looks without major modifications. They’re as famous for the coordinating outfits as they are for the commentary. And too awesome to put on the craft counter vest and the plunging neckline. I’ve followed skating for decades, so this was a cool challenge to see. I would have been fangirling the whole time. Octavio can take that giant hat and clown collar costume and gtfo my tv. He was in the top once for his Halloween hefty bag dress. That doesn’t make him a top tier contestant. He should have gone for ignoring the client’s request. And although I can’t stand Katie, he was a flaming jerk to her the whole time. No, Rainbow Bright doesn’t go to his clubs, but he made me feel sorry for her. But she needs to grow a spine. Aaron and Shantall should have gone with something other than jet black and dark blue, the intricate details were lost. Lilac and dark purple beading? Grey and black? Something else.

I hate how the bottom feeders don’t go to people on the fringe of the core alliance and play into their fears. Why didn’t Heather, Evie, Tiff, Erika, Zander try and pull Naseer and Ricard? Imagine planning a potluck with Shan. You think you’re going with a bbq and next thing it’s vegan. She’s exhausting and too preachy (pun intended). Reminds me of why I quit the local church. And Ricard eating the papaya, he’s an asshole. Hope the cheese ruined his digestive system for a few days. People aren’t eating at all, and he come back from having a meal and goes for the loser’s food? I’d have put his name out there immediately.

Lea was singled out by Travis Wall for her dancing. That shows her technique. She may not look like the Botox bleach purchased boobs Barbie Box cheerleader, but she’s grown on me. Cutting someone as good as her would be a mistake. I like her pop, her power and her different look.

And shiny and fake and airbrushed. (Continuing the Fred abuse). Who do we have to pay off to get him off this show? I want a friend like Josh, dog sits, gives up his commission (probably like me buying someone lunch), enjoys new car features. Can he be rented? I’m not retired yet, still have my original teeth and hips, but I can act older...

Chastity’s gown could have been wheeled down the runway due to walking issues and it still was my winner. Octavio’s looked like he’d been scared by Hefty bags. Glad Kenneth got booted, he should have gone last week. No clue how Darren wasn’t in the bottom.

I’m trying to figure out if I liked any of the designers or looks tonight. Aaron’s was a Taylor Swift video outfit. Katie was one clown short of a circus, Cristina was in my bottom, and I think I saw that painted red pleather in the 80’s. Meg and her tears during meditation got to me last week, stfu and go sew. And then just say “nope”, you’ve already patterned it out. Christian didn’t help by starting the model switch thing. I liked the past seasons when it wasn’t a dive for cards. Let the winner pick and then do a random draw. BUT her constant yapping about how woke she was, I was ready to punch her and I’m an older white woman. The best ally is one NOT trying to narrate someone else’s story.

What in the fresh hell of interior design choices is this thing? 😂 The butterflies were even worse.

Never was a Maddie fan, still not. Glad she’s having an awesome life as an All Star and if we got her instead of “Showmanship Melissa”, I could live with that. Ava seems even younger than 19. I’d have cut her just for asking if “best solo” was good. I know they’re not hiring Mensa level I.Q., but she’s about as smart as a houseplant. The giggles annoy me too. Grow up or go away. I hate “flail around and look constipated” choreography, but Travis is awesome and I love his energy.

Ava is not DCC material. She’s too young, and a giggling disaster. Sorry to see Cailey go, shows the damage drunk drivers do, even when their victims walk away.

I watch everything on dvr these days. Best part of that is being able to fast forward through Fredrik. I can’t stand the facials, the fake shock and outrage, and the Instagram ready family unit. Seeing Suzanne Somers made me feel very old. I can see that place becoming a yoga retreat, spa, drug rehab for the rich or something. Something involving crystals or beads or healing energy. 😂 Ohm. Hi Bobby, glad to see you’re making your parent’s wish come true. Good luck getting Josh to take a break, although the old people in the area might appeal to him. He can find new friends. I freaking love Flagg, he’s an encyclopedia of what’s formerly hip and coming back again.

So, Tiffany was basically hanging out and going backwards on the beam. Then blows the plan to boot Xander and his advantages. BUT Voce goes? K.

Now I want Randy to be like “hello you” to all the brides. 😂 No “beautiful” in the bunch. KloneKardashian sister was annoying. And acting. I hope the consultants get extra for the show, because wasting hours on these wanna be reality tv people must be annoying and unprofitable. Happy to see Randy out of the iPad and back in real life. Feather bride was cute, and I loved her gift, but when her whole entourage also were “designers”, it got a bit OTT.

Sad face mom must have been an act? No one can be that negative and mopey all the time. Talk about throwing off negativity. Could they not get her coffee or uppers or something? New hairy chest consultant can dance off into the sunset.

Do the ladies hate Sutton because she’s independently wealthy (due to being smart enough to hire great lawyers and forensic accountants)? Or because she isn’t going with the mob mentality that all of Erika’s lies are the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth? Kathy should just serve Happy Meals on trays at this point, this crowd is not worth the nice stuff. Hope her butler got a nice bonus after that dinner.

Odd how since Palm Springs Erika has had less and less on camera help. Guess she realized the producers are NOT her friends. But her comment that the rose came from Tom’s mansion crypt was damning since that could be something the creditors would be after. Tune in next week when Erika takes a job as an Uber driver. Garcelle said everything I’ve ever wanted to say to Dorit. But it would be amended to “F*ck you and your rental clothes, dog dumper”.

Eh, there’s days I’m happy to see my collarbones when I look in a mirror. Thank you for bringing back that Megan C photo. I can’t be the only one who would see that avatar and blow it up to giggle at it. And I was and still am a huge fan, she was one of my favorites no matter how she looked in that uniform. That woman could sell a dance!

Guess they’re now doing synchronized swimming in the new pool which is being built under the 50 yard line. It’s in the shape of the Star, raises up, spins and everything. Kick line is now called “The Splashdown”. Rookies jump last.

We need a Texorcism, that freaking mascot was scary. 😳😂