S08.E07: Motherducker

[lezlers]

1 hour ago, GreatKazu said:

It wasn't wrong.

My issue with Roxanne is her putting herself in the middle of that situation. It isn't her argument or her place. That is what Briana should be doing, but she won't. She sits there with that fucking pouty lip like a child and lets her sister and mother do her fighting and arguing for her. Roxanne has allowed herself to be in enabler and her daughter's speaker along with being Nova's caretaker and no doubt, she will be responsible for her newest grandchild. Roxanne ends up being the responsible one for these babies, but it doesn't have to be that way.  

I am so damn frustrated with Roxanne. She chooses to enable her and coddle Briana and look what it gets her. She might be one of those mothers that doesn't mind having her adult children around all her life, but she is not doing them any favors by doing so. How is Briana supposed to learn how to deal with life's problems if her mother and sister are always there as her safety net? If I had adult children living with me, and one of them was a mother, the last thing I'd be doing is sitting at home babysitting that child while her mother goes out to clubs, drinking and having random sex with dudes. Her ass would be in a job or sticking her nose in the books to better her future. Anything else, she better find someone who will charge her to babysit.  I am so glad my adult children didn't come home pregnant or get anyone pregnant. To this day, I am not a grandmother because they were careful and want to enjoy their lives before settling down. Also, one of them is gay. 

The past can't be changed. What's done is done. But if Roxanne doesn't make any changes to how she parents (I won't hold my breath), she will find herself babysitting two grandkids while their mama is out strutting her stuff at some club, drinking it up and having sex with another guy on the first night. 

OMG, I laughed so hard at this.  I never really thought about it, but that is a definite plus to having a gay child!  No worries about teenage pregnancy.  I love it.

[GreatKazu]

50 minutes ago, lezlers said:

OMG, I laughed so hard at this.  I never really thought about it, but that is a definite plus to having a gay child!  No worries about teenage pregnancy.  I love it.

Oh I know. lol Definite plus. I still worry about diseases. I hope my talks to them have knocked common sense into them - always make sure protection is used, no matter what they tell you. 

[Rebecca]

7 hours ago, GreatKazu said:

It wasn't wrong.

My issue with Roxanne is her putting herself in the middle of that situation. It isn't her argument or her place. That is what Briana should be doing, but she won't. She sits there with that fucking pouty lip like a child and lets her sister and mother do her fighting and arguing for her. Roxanne has allowed herself to be in enabler and her daughter's speaker along with being Nova's caretaker and no doubt, she will be responsible for her newest grandchild. Roxanne ends up being the responsible one for these babies, but it doesn't have to be that way.  

I am so damn frustrated with Roxanne. She chooses to enable her and coddle Briana and look what it gets her. She might be one of those mothers that doesn't mind having her adult children around all her life, but she is not doing them any favors by doing so. How is Briana supposed to learn how to deal with life's problems if her mother and sister are always there as her safety net? If I had adult children living with me, and one of them was a mother, the last thing I'd be doing is sitting at home babysitting that child while her mother goes out to clubs, drinking and having random sex with dudes. Her ass would be in a job or sticking her nose in the books to better her future. Anything else, she better find someone who will charge her to babysit.  I am so glad my adult children didn't come home pregnant or get anyone pregnant. To this day, I am not a grandmother because they were careful and want to enjoy their lives before settling down. Also, one of them is gay. 

The past can't be changed. What's done is done. But if Roxanne doesn't make any changes to how she parents (I won't hold my breath), she will find herself babysitting two grandkids while their mama is out strutting her stuff at some club, drinking it up and having sex with another guy on the first night. 

If only this whole thing could be underlined and bolded and sent to Roxanne because, exactly!!

Also, the way this is going I think she could wind up raising her great grandchildren when Briana's kids become teen parents themselves. Who is going to teach Nova to make better choices? 

[ReadMeLattice]

Maybe she should switch it up and start going out with dudes and asking Briana to babysit while she's at the club? That's what I wish Barb would do, lol. 

[Christina87]

2 hours ago, Lm2162 said:

Maybe she should switch it up and start going out with dudes and asking Briana to babysit while she's at the club? That's what I wish Barb would do, lol. 

So much this! I could just hear Briana scream, "maaaaaaaaaaaaam!" Haha every time Roxanne pops up on my screen, I think she is going for soap actress of the year!

[GreatKazu]

1 hour ago, Christina87 said:

So much this! I could just hear Briana scream, "maaaaaaaaaaaaam!" Haha every time Roxanne pops up on my screen, I think she is going for soap actress of the year!

lol

The Drama Awards.

[jacksgirl]

On 8/22/2017 at 11:15 PM, Ffiferoo said:

It sounds like you had an awful experience with your own kids and as someone working in special ed in a public school it's terrible to hear that you all went through that.  Obviously it doesn't change what you experienced and I don't fault you for feeling how you do based on that, but I can tell you that the vast majority of public educators work very hard to address student needs.  It sounded to me like Ali's teacher was advocating for her and talking to Leah and Corey about pushing for more support for her in school. 

Late to the party, and haven't read all comments, but had to respond. Ali needs to be placed on a 504 accommodation plan. This plan is a legal document that is for students who need something different than their typical peers but do not qualify for an IEP. Accommodations are written with guidance from parents, counselor, teacher and principal and they must be followed. An example of an accommodation is reading a test out loud to a child, reduced homework, more time in the cafeteria, Etc. It sounds like Ali's teacher really wants what's best for her, but it is true that the squeaky wheel gets the grease. Corey and Leah need to step up go to the school meet with school staff and work together to come up with the plan.

[GreatKazu]

Leah and Cory agreed Ali needs to be treated equally like Gracie at all costs. There was something that came up a few seasons ago where both of them were adamant they didn't want things to be different for Ali. My mind is so tired right now, I can't remember what the issue was at that time.

Thankfully, Cory seems to be pulling away from that thinking going by him saying he felt an aide for Ali was in her best interest. Leah posted on her Instagram: 

http://www.inquisitr.com/4445113/leah-messer-speaks-out-about-her-daughter-alis-muscular-dystrophy-on-instagram/

“We didn’t want her to feel different in a special needs class, but if it was in the best interest of Ali Girl, that’s all that mattered!” Leah Messer explained.

[ghoulina]

It's a process. Do I wish they had handled Ali's diagnosis perfectly from day one? Of course. But having never had a kid with MD, I am in no position to judge. I do have a daughter on the Autism spectrum, and while it's not even in the same ballpark with what Ali goes through, I can relate to the struggle between wanting your child to be able to do everything her peers do, and wanting them to get the help they really NEED. Leah and Cory have definitely fucked up along the way, but I do have hope that they seem to be finally stepping out of the land of denial and stepping it up. 

[Ffiferoo]

Ali seems to get related services (physical and occupational therapy) at school already and had them as a pre-school student as well, so the likelihood is that she already has at least a 504 plan if not an IEP already.  It might depend on state or district practices for what type of plan you need to have in order to get those services, or staff may be looking to switch her to an IEP from a 504 if they don't do aide support for 504 students.  These kinds of things vary a lot across states and districts and can be especially confusing when students move between districts (which I believe they did after the flooding issues last year or because of the new house?)  I can imagine a situation where the teacher emailed to talk about concerns/suggestions and mentioned that she would need a special education referral for an IEP to get more support, which might have led Leah and Corey to think she'd end up in a separate or self-contained class away from her current classmates.  That's a common misconception because of how often student with special needs used to be isolated in school, whereas now there's more of a focus on inclusion and least-restrictive environment as much as possible.  We get that question a lot from parents who are new to special ed because they remember how it was when they were in school and often just don't have any basis of comparison outside of that recollection.  It's not surprising that Leah and Corey might have that same worry, especially because Ali is quite with-it as far as knowing that she's different and they're conscious of her feelings about that. 

If nothing else, I'm very pleasantly surprised with Leah's improvement this season, she's really starting to step up as a parent more and seems to have gotten her shit together, even if her classes haven't worked out so well.  Always good to see her and Corey working together to get Ali what she needs (if only they'd apply some of that to listening to the doctor about the wheelchair)!

[CofCinci]

Only the school gives a shit about the kid. 

[GreatKazu]

The school has the motorized chair more than the parents. 

[ReadMeLattice]

2 hours ago, CofCinci said:

Only the school gives a shit about the kid. 

Yeah, I'm pleased to see her school seems involved and aware. Many are not! 

Many parents of children with MD, and adults with MD, would kill for face time with someone like Dr. Tsao. I would feel differently if it seemed like they were now FINALLY taking his recommendations but it seems like they still aren't (unless I'm misunderstanding given the wonky timelines), so I don't feel bad about continuing to judge them unless I'm wrong and they've changed their ways. 

Edited August 29, 2017 by Lm2162

[Mkay]

Can someone start a topic for tonight's episode?  I tried but somehow messed it up and it didn't post. 

[WerWerWer]

19 minutes ago, Mkay said:

Can someone start a topic for tonight's episode?  I tried but somehow messed it up and it didn't post. 

Done. (Hopefully correctly.)