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All Episodes Talk: All Rise


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We call them litigants!

There are a lot of uninsured and underinsured drivers out there. That's why it's important to adequately insure your own vehicle. Unless you have a car you can afford to replace with cash in the event of an accident, full coverage is imperative. In most states, uninsured coverage is just for bodily injury, not property damage. So it's a good idea to carry comp and collision as well. Also, the less valuable the car is, the lower the premiums will be.

 I call them idiots!

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Unless you have a car you can afford to replace with cash in the event of an accident

 

Considering that a large number of crashed and totalled cars we hear about on this show are often over 15 years old, a little cash usually can buy another of equal quality.

Edited by AngelaHunter
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So I am pulling into a parking spot in front of the CVS.  Dude is walking to his car and not paying attention.  He is walking straight at my car.  I stop.  2 ft from my car he jumps and then starts laughing.  I rolled down my window and told him I wanted him to walk into me cuz I was going on Judge Judy to swear to god the pedestrian hit me!

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Desean "Piece of Garbage" Marquez: his refrigerator-shaped wife sure did a number on the mistress he was lying to, punching her in the face pretty bad.  "It's not my fault she can't fight" and "we're still married, I'm not going anywhere, and he's not going anywhere" - how much do you want to bet he has another mistress right now, simpleton?  Is he still going around without a ring and telling the ladies that he files his taxes as a single man?

 

I Don't Have Enough Money To Do Anything With My Life:  Poor you.  You look able-bodied.  Anyway this was a 5 minute case.. the best part of which was tomorrow's preview!  OMG!  A PIG case!!!  A pig!!! Squeal! 

 

A Cheater, a Beater and a Drinker:  The beater is the car, of course.  And the drinker is the plaintiff who paid up her tickets at last after they pulled her license, but they didn't restore it... yeah I smell a few DUIs too many in those "moving violations" - a little swerving after leaving the bar, maybe?  Hallterview: I don't think I have ever seen such a poor performance denying that one has cheated.  If you suck so bad at lying, don't cheat; and if you do cheat, just come clean.  Some people think they can pull it off...but not everyone has the mad skills of one Desean "Piece of Garbage" Marquez!

 

Deer in The Headlights Landlady: Hey, Shark Eyes, you can't just unilaterally change the terms of your tenant's lease.  I liked the defendant, she wasn't taking it seriously at all.   I believed her stories in the hallterview, that Shark Eyes called animal control on her, was following her around, and not giving her the keys she needed.  Shark Eyes probably hasn't cracked a smile since 1971.  She's just a dour, controlling, stone faced malevolent presence.  I'm glad the plaintiff broke free and that JJ threw that ridiculous lawsuit out of court!  Too many explanations and not enough dressing down of the gargoyle plaintiff for my taste.

 

 

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ToasterStrudel - as usual, your summations are right on target.

 

Desean "Carlos"? Sheri, sweetheart, I know you're not heavy in the brains department, but are you fucking kidding us? Did someone whisper in your ear that aliens had vaporized all the other male creatures on the planet, so you felt the need to grab Desean "Carlos" AND drag your poor, unfortunate looking daughter to hear all the sordid details?

I would eat all the medical bills I incurred from the attack of the beastly Refrigerator before I would tell the world that I found Desean so irresistable(!?) I was willing to slink off to a No-Tell Motel with that thing. The desperation factor we see here just keeps flying off the scale. JFC...

 

Short and Sweet: JJ ousted Giggling Godfrey the Silly Stringbean (looking oddly girlish in spite of the fluffy beard) and left me again puzzled at the choices some women make. Plaintiff was attractive, seemed intelligent and put together, yet she chose Godfrey. Go figure.

 

QuoteA Cheater, a Beater and a Drinker:

 

Laveta, a mature women who is a mother yet simply cannot drive a car without racking up so many tickets her license is taken away. That's not bad enough, but she has to get drunk and act like a savage, vandalizing the beater of her blank-eyed baby daddy.

 

QuoteHey, Shark Eyes

 

Ms. Hicks from Minnesota! I guess she didn't plan on how to react when caught red-handed with her doctored docs and lies, so she was all like, duhhh. She's actually lucky she was in front of JJ, who seems to take this kind of nonsensical fibbing with a grain of salt, and not in front of Marilyn Milian who goes ballistic when litigants think she's stupid and would have torn ol' Beth a new one.

 

 

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The wife who beat up the mistress was crazy. She had a bad case of bitchface, she had a crooked ass trench coat, and her she looked like went to the Damn Bitch What The Fuck Hair hair salon. I can see why he cheated on her...the chick he cheated with seemed nice and pleasant. And soft. The wife seemed mean as fuck. And what was with her not remembering anything. Did the bitch even remember her name?

 

The thirty second case with the girl suing her ex-boyfriend about breaking the lease was funny because I actually liked the guy. He seemed like a really nice guy. Like, a sweet guy. It made me smile when he was like, "she cheated on me with the guy she brought to court with her".

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Oh, my!  Piece of Garbage Marquez and Mrs Refrigerator, what a pair!  She was STILL insisting in the hallway that there was NO AFFAIR!  And she just didn't get it, that her husband was the BAD ONE, not the other woman.  The other woman DIDN'T take VOWS , Mrs Refrigerator!  And Sheri, the Plaintiff, come on, girl!  Get some self-esteem PRONTO!

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Oh, my!  Piece of Garbage Marquez and Mrs Refrigerator, what a pair!

What was missing IMHO is why the heck two women were fighting over POG Marquez - apparently he had the plaintiff driving him to work every day while Mrs. Double Door Fridge knew about it (and I'm assuming they were canoodling in the mornings when she came to pick him up AT HIS HOUSE). And I missed the memo about what appealing factors Senior POG had that made all the ladees love him 

 

Could you imagine coming out of the urgent care with your prescription in hand and watching two meaty women whacking on each other in the parking lot? At least she didn't have to go far to get an ice pack with her blood eye. 

Edited by ItsHelloPattiagain
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What was missing IMHO is why the heck two women were fighting over POG Marquez - apparently he had the plaintiff driving him to work every day while Mrs. Double Door Fridge knew about it. Could you imagine coming out of the urgent care with your prescription in hand and watching two meaty women whacking on each other in the parking lot? At least she didn't have to go far to get an ice pack with her blood eye. 

Must be quite the catch, hidden charms.  UGH.

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Hey, QuinnM, I'll see your 200+ car crash and raise you a twin-engine plane trying to land with no wheels. JJ cut out right before the good stuff.  Glad I at least got to see "Not my fault she don't know how to fight" in the previews.  How'd the case end? (since QuinnM and I missed it!)

 

And this:

 

the Damn Bitch What The Fuck Hair hair salon.

 

may be the funniest damn thing I've seen/read in a long, long time.  Most excellent, 27Bored!. :-)

 

Boatload of tenant/landlord messes in the old episodes today. ** I ** was hoping for a trap door! First woman (long black hair) was just a mess, and the stupid young girl with way older former boyfriend was an idiot. Don't pay rent, not on the lease, leave your stuff in the house (including rotting food) and then sue for FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS??  My blood pressure was through the roof.  I understand JJ didn't award the landlord any money because renters have none, but what about all the other "poor" litigants who have their debts paid by the show? Why didn't he get what he was owed?  And I was SOOOOOO glad that she said the GIRL has to pony up the $150 to get her stuff out of storage. Would have been really ticked off if the show had paid that. He was a saint to have hauled it all away and kept it safe. Been there, done that, and it's a total pain in the ass. And NEVER appreciated.

 

Breathe in, breathe out. 

Take more blood pressure meds..... Argh!

Edited by SandyToes
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To cut to the chase for those who missed it, Mrs Refrigerator and her disgusting POG, "Carlos" lost their case.  Sheri, the plaintiff who got pummeled in her car, was awarded $5000.  Wifey was still insisting hubby was true to her.  Icky-poo.

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What is so appealing about Fat Albert's cousin "Piece of Garbage"??  It was obvious that the scary wife foolishly believed and defended her cheating husband when she kept claiming that she didn't remember details.  She was gross, and I hope that she fights her STDs as voraciously as she fought the plaintiff.  

 

I'm glad the hipster case was short; I'm not a fan of hipster cases.  They seem to "perform," but maybe I'm skewed from the people who scammed JJ with a fake case (I can't remember all of the details..something about a dead cat).  

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Must be quite the catch, hidden charms.  UGH.

 

Hidden so deeply an archeologist couldn't unearth them. Cases like this make me embarassed to be a woman. We're not all this disgustingly desperate, honest! I wouldn't touch that POG if he were the last male creature on earth, not even if I were wearing a hazmat suit. Double "UGH".

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Having been on the receiving end of a cheater, I simply can't see why these deluded women STILL blame the other woman!  YOUR CHEATING PIG OF A HUSBAND promised you his fidelity!  The "other woman" made no such promise, and in fact, was lied to just as much as YOU WERE.

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Deer in The Headlights Landlady: Hey, Shark Eyes, you can't just unilaterally change the terms of your tenant's lease.

 

OMG, she was blinking so fast after JJ caught her out on the changes, I thought she was going to either faint or have a seizure!

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POG Desean's wife is a bloody idiot for continuing to defend him but I am not giving plaintiff Shari a whole lot of credit here. I believe that he pursued her and told her he was single, but she found out he was married at some point before they broke up. She did all that digging for a reason. She is the one that sought out the defendant over Facebook to find out if she was the wife. Why did she do that unless some independent source told her he was married and who the wife was? How else would she know who to look for? It doesn't excuse the idiot defendant, but I do not for one second believe that Shari stopped dating POG after she knew he was married. She probably only broke up with him after she realized that it wasn't worth getting her face beat in. (And she's definitely right about that.) Both those women are morons.

 

Stupid landlord - what a freaking moron. Just staring there unblinking, and not answering questions. But the lease says I can make any changes I want!! That lady is bat shit crazy and the defendant is well rid of her.

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Ok, I'm only in my 20s and don't know many married people, but she kept saying he said he wasn't married. Is it common to just ask a man if he's married right off the bat especially if he doesn't wear a ring? How does that conversation even come up unless you think he might be? HELP

Frau POG was a true idiot though. Her hallterview gave me the impression that she was staying with him to spite the plaintiff. YEAH THAT'LL SHOW HER!

Edited by WhoaWhoKnew
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Oh, my!  Piece of Garbage Marquez and Mrs Refrigerator, what a pair!  She was STILL insisting in the hallway that there was NO AFFAIR!  And she just didn't get it, that her husband was the BAD ONE, not the other woman.  The other woman DIDN'T take VOWS , Mrs Refrigerator!  And Sheri, the Plaintiff, come on, girl!  Get some self-esteem PRONTO!

 

It must be the D that's keeping her there. She's a woman of a certain age, and he's a man of a certain age. I think she's worried about losing him and having to play the field. But in two years when she starts getting on his damn nerves again and he starts giving the glad eye to another lady who's plain-in-the-face, wide-in-the-waist, is she going to try and beat her up, too?

 

And where is her mother or girlfriend or somebody who can keep it real with her to tell her he's making her look like a straight-up fool on TV by causing her to fight a side chick and then be all like, "I'm standing by my man". Well, she probably doesn't have anybody to keep it real with her if she went on TV looking like who did it and ran, but still, damn.

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Not that I don't love this thread, but today has been especially pleasing given the great POG case today.

Fat Albert's cousin "Piece of Garbage"

Still laughing about this.

I, for one, am THRILLED Fat Albert's dim cousin and Mrs Whirlpool are still together. Have fun spending the rest of your life in misery, you two.

It must be the D that's keeping her there.

Oh, man. Maybe if the D were attached to Ryan Gosling I could understand. But that dude was a double-bagger.
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I am not giving plaintiff Shari a whole lot of credit here.

 

Right. Sheri needs intensive therapy to find out what would make her want to bump uglies with Mr. POG, no matter if he has no wife,  one wife or ten.

 

Shark Eyes idiot landlord: For once I wasn't annoyed at a defendant standing there laughing. If anyone deserved to be mocked and jeered at, SE did.

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Shark Eyes Landlord was a little scary.  I think she was trying to control JJ with those eyes!

 

Seriously... she was eerily reminiscent of Futurama's "Hypnotoad".  I did learn a new legal term, void for vagueness, thanks to her ridiculous attempt to alter the defendant's lease.

 

Re: Linebacker Lady married to Mr. POG:

 

And where is her mother or girlfriend or somebody who can keep it real with her to tell her he's making her look like a straight-up fool on TV by causing her to fight a side chick and then be all like, "I'm standing by my man". Well, she probably doesn't have anybody to keep it real with her if she went on TV looking like who did it and ran, but still, damn.

 

I have a notion anyone who tried to keep it real with her would wind up getting body-slammed.  She seemed so deep in denial she'd get the bends if she came up too quickly.

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Ok, I'm only in my 20s and don't know many married people, but she kept saying he said he wasn't married. Is it common to just ask a man if he's married right off the bat especially if he doesn't wear a ring? How does that conversation even come up unless you think he might be? HELP

 

I'm not gonna lie....there are a good number of cheaters out there.  And some of them are quite skilled at the art of deception.  Just know this: if you have suspicions and confront a guy, run like hell if he offers to show you his tax forms as proof of being unmarried....or proof of anything else, really.  That is just a sketchy way to defend oneself.  And NEVER put down your car window if the woman he's with approaches your car.  

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Ok, I'm only in my 20s and don't know many married people, but she kept saying he said he wasn't married. Is it common to just ask a man if he's married right off the bat especially if he doesn't wear a ring? How does that conversation even come up unless you think he might be? HELP

Frau POG was a true idiot though. Her hallterview gave me the impression that she was staying with him to spite the plaintiff. YEAH THAT'LL SHOW HER!

Yes, as you get older and if you find yourself dating in midlife, there are lots of fiftysomething wannabe Romeos who are looking for a little side action. There are useful hints and tricks to suss out if they are married (like if they only call or text during the workday, or if "emergencies" routinely come up when you have plans to do something). And -- there is the trusty Internet to Google them with.

 

But Sheri -- DAMN, girl! A DVD and a pint of Haagen-Dazs would be a better alternative to Desean "Carlos" POG!

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But Sheri -- DAMN, girl! A DVD and a pint of Haagen-Dazs would be a better alternative to Desean "Carlos" POG!

You are being far too kind! A brick to the face is a better alternative to DeSean's D.

Also! Sheri WORKED with this guy. At some point during his, what I have to assume were obvious flirtations, wouldn't one of the co-workers tip her off? Now granted, I'm sure he didn't have any pictures of The Norge on his desk, but she picked him up from work a lot I assume. Or was he THAT slick that he told everyone she was his sister?

Seriously. That story could have been mined for more gold but, instead, JJ chose to waste our time with Unfortunate Hipster Beard Man whose story could not have been more boring, and possibly, fake.

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POG Desean's wife is a bloody idiot for continuing to defend him but I am not giving plaintiff Shari a whole lot of credit here. I believe that he pursued her and told her he was single, but she found out he was married at some point before they broke up. She did all that digging for a reason. She is the one that sought out the defendant over Facebook to find out if she was the wife. Why did she do that unless some independent source told her he was married and who the wife was? How else would she know who to look for? It doesn't excuse the idiot defendant, but I do not for one second believe that Shari stopped dating POG after she knew he was married. She probably only broke up with him after she realized that it wasn't worth getting her face beat in. (And she's definitely right about that.) Both those women are morons.

 

Stupid landlord - what a freaking moron. Just staring there unblinking, and not answering questions. But the lease says I can make any changes I want!! That lady is bat shit crazy and the defendant is well rid of her.

Thank you for posting this more eloquently than I could have. Yes the defendant is a delusional fool desperately trying to hold on to the one man she thinks will have her (I'm of the rather be alone and happy than married and miserable camp), but that plaintiff was being a fool too. Once she knew he was married, why not just walk away? Why reach out to the wife and then ask if they can all meet up? Who does that?

I've unwittingly dated two married women who, apparently, wanted to live out their gay fantasies with me. The second I found out they were married, I was gone. I don't need to understand what happened on a deep philosophical level or have group therapy sessions with the couple. You get out and cease contact. No, she didn't deserve the beat down; the husband did. But, damn, girl. At what point are you going to gather your self-respect and bounce?

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Having been on the receiving end of a cheater, I simply can't see why these deluded women STILL blame the other woman!  YOUR CHEATING PIG OF A HUSBAND promised you his fidelity!  The "other woman" made no such promise, and in fact, was lied to just as much as YOU WERE.

Unfortunately, a hell of a lot more women blame the other women, consistently, and not the man. I too have never understood how the other woman always becomes the scapegoat, the dumping ground for all the "rage" associated. To put this in "legal-speak", in "Judy-speak" is: If your spouse/partner cheats, they broke their word. Period. The "agreement" to be a monogamous couple is between you, and him or her. The other person made you no promises, therefore they did not break the agreement. If married, and/or religious, they cheater broke the covenant, not the "other.

 

Most have been, or will be cheated on in their life. When it happen to me, although angry at the concept of the other woman, I was never in doubt about where me "rage" should be. And I had no problem letting my anger fly towards the cheat.

 

Madea's sister, Mean Joe Green, can stomp around like Godzilla, and she will still never get it. And her husband will never be faithful. She can beat all the ass she wants, and he's still going to cheat. She's gonna be whooping on somebody until she walks away, or osteoporosis sets in, and she snaps a hip.

 

I think if Judy could, have she would have given her more money just 'cuz.

 

 

Shark Eyes idiot landlord: For once I wasn't annoyed at a defendant standing there laughing. If anyone deserved to be mocked and jeered at, SE did.

That's what I was thinking too. Normally Judy, and I would be cutting a side eye at the defendant w/all the smirking and laughing. But I was right there w/her this time. Holy WTF Batman. You can't just decide you wanna change the terms of a lease. And then when that doesn't work, act as though 'cuz I said so is good enough. The tenant's not your child. You can't ground her. Once you change the rules she had every right to get the hell out of there.

 

And the plaintiff made me feel like she was trying to hypnotize me. What was up w/all the blinking and squinting? Did she think there was some sort of blink count she had to reach per minute. Or was she trying to mind meld w/Judy? Pull and Obi-Wan Kenobi Jedi mind trick on Judy to win her case?

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And the plaintiff made me feel like she was trying to hypnotize me. What was up w/all the blinking and squinting? Did she think there was some sort of blink count she had to reach per minute. Or was she trying to mind meld w/Judy? Pull and Obi-Wan Kenobi Jedi mind trick on Judy to win her case?

My former boss was just like Shark Eyes.  Whenever she didn't like someone's answer (or if she just spaced out, which she did often), her spooky ass would just stare like a freak at the other person.  It was so bad that someone who was being stared at asked her if she was feeling okay....the person thought she may be having a stroke.  Stroke - no.  Complete asshole - yes.  I was happy when JJ yelled at SE.

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Aw yes, the intimidation by staring technique.  When that doesn't work, it's often followed by the raising of the voice, folding arms over chest, and/or stepping closer to invade personal space.  Know it well.

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SandyToes and QuinnM, I'll see your 200+car crash and twin-engine plane landing with no wheels and raise you an approximate four hour hostage situation in a law office that deals with immigration law. They came back when the landlord case started and then cut away to the press conference. I am sad I missed that case because I was baffled by her staring. And her outfit. It was kind of creepy.

Edited by Mischievious
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Mischievious, well we know I'm in MN and that Sandy is in Houston.  And it turns out we are now in the thousands of crashes so I'm surprised we have anything on tv.

 

I did make it back to see the hipster declare the standard deadbeat mantra of 'I guess money means more to her than love'.  Yes you are not hot enough for her to support.

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There are some desperate pitiful people out there. Why would anyone want Desean?  I actually think the plaintiff did need to get her ass beat. Maybe the next time her dumb ass gets involved with a married man she won't contact his wife.  She figured out he was married and starting stalking the wife and asking questions and demanding  the marriage certificate.  Just move on and take your L.

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A Pox On Both Your Houses - So your boyfriend cheated on you, you left him, that doesn't mean you get to sue him for assaulting him and leaving him to pay the whole rent etc.  Worth it to see Byrd finally lose it.

Apparently the "Pox' case was hidden in my DVR and I was updating last night and found it - Byrd cracking up was making me crack up - but all I could think about what the potential reaction would have been from a previous defendant - remember the idiot conceited girl EMT who when told that her goose was cooked replied " I don't eat goose"? I was thinking she would have been saying "I already had the chicken pox!" if JJ had poxed her house! 

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remember the idiot conceited girl EMT who when told that her goose was cooked replied " I don't eat goose"?

 

Ah, yes. The amoral, vicious and nasty little twat who is going to have helpless, injured trauma victims at her mercy, who would or would not help people based on the way they might speak to her.

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Ping Pong Pork - I hate it when people buy an animal from a breeder and the breeder attaches all kinds of conditions post purchase, like forcing you to feed your cat a raw diet, not allowing you to declaw it, or if you come to your sense and regret enslaving yourself to a dog, you can't rehome the smelly beast yourself.  I'm reminded  of Michael Moore's movie "Pets or Meat" - now that was the right attitude.  If you buy a pet, it should be your choice to keep feeding it, or eat it.  This porcine pig breeder was the worst.  First, she sold the pig to one Jessica in Wyoming, sight unseen.  Jessica could have been living in a veritable sty for all she knew!  Lovely Jessica's purchase was a foolish one, because it cost her $1000 and the next month, she didn't bring home enough bacon and she couldn't make rent.  In a hurry, she posted an ad on craigslist and sold the pig to a guy who drove a hard bargain down to $225.  He got instructions on how to take care of the pig (I hope there was a recipe for BBQ sauce) and the name of the breeder if he had questions.  When he called the breeder he got the third degree from her about how much he paid for the pig (you have to freeze frame the supplied document to get the details) and she saw a business opportunity.  She decided the pig was still hers and she was going to buy it from the new family for $225 and sell it to some people on her pig/ham waiting list somewhere in Canada, where it would have been glazed with maple syrup.  The new owner wouldn't abide, hence this stupid lawsuit.

 

Two Tweekers and a Cat: JJ threw that one out when she found out that the plaintiff was suing another person in another court for the theft of the same items.  The hallterview was adorable with the defendant, obviously high, advising us all not to hire people like her to house sit.  I'm going to write that one down.

 

Three cases after that.

 

I'll skip the first one because it's over a couch, washer and dryer.  Standard fare.

 

Eyeball-Eating Pitbull: Oh my, those were some gruesome injuries, but not as gruesome as the depraved, responsibility-dodging owner of Jaws of Death. Of course, the cretin who chose to own this wicked beast couldn't be bothered to get homeowners insurance.  Now we're used to the common excuses, each defendant in these cases will pick one or two, but this mule was rattling off excuses in every direction.  The dog wasn't there eating her neighbor's eyeball because it was secure in her garage, then after some prodding the dog was screened in, then with more prodding the dog was able to open the sliding door, but that was only because the neighbor had tantalized the saintly pitbull by placing her ridiculously tiny sissy dog in a dog food bowl with the pitbull's name on it.  According to the defendant, the plaintiff misread the pitbull's cues and deserved to be half-eaten.  Next time keep your reactions in check!  Otherwise you could make that gentle canine lamb go off on you like a demon from hell.

 

Friendly Wicket, Fake Tickets: - Aw c'mon, I wanted to know what concert these losers were paying hundreds of dollars to see.  The only interesting thing here is that JJ decided that the defendant's friends did not get in the concert according to his own text message, while in the hallterview the plaintiffs admitted that the defendant's friends actually did get in.  They must watch the show... if it looks like you're winning... shut up!

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Thank you Toaster Strudel, for the warning.

 

I see I'll have to skip most of these cases where idiot humans don't have half the brains of the animals unfortunate enough to end up in the clutches of brain dead morons to whom I would not entrust the care of a guppy.

 

I would be thrilled never to see another case involving animals.

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Maybe I wasn't paying attention, but it seemed like the pig lady should have been having a beef with Jessica....it looked like Jessica was the one that didn't abide by the contract.  I think the contract said that if the pig could no longer remain with the buyer, the buyer was to contact the pig lady so she could repurchase the pig.  

 

The next case dealt with a bad cleaning service from a 17-year-old on Craigslist (duh)....  so, does JJ always dismiss cases that have open, active cases in the actual court system?  I guess it makes sense, since it could be seen as profiting twice (depending on the ruling), but I don't know how it works in the land of TV court.  Once the owner of the house said that she had a case in Washington, JJ beat feet.  Also, WTH was going on with the homeowner's hairdo?  One side was completely shaved on the side.  If that is intentional, it is really harsh and unbecoming...if it's some medical issue, then pardon my rudeness.  

 

JJ gave zero shits about the case regarding splitting property.  So did I.  Their yammering about weight equipment and couches became background noise, and I was lost in my thoughts about guys with neck tats and face piercing.  There are women who find that attractive?  What job interviewer thinks that look is a plus?  One of my old co-workers is married to a guy with foolishness all over his neck...he can't get a decent job, and he is one of those "I'll haul junk out of your house" hustlas.  

 

Myline Berrios (Jaws of Death's owner) hardly opened her mouth when she spoke....that grates on my nerves.  The other woman had quite an ugly injury.  But Myline was all "I don't give a F," and she looked like she was ready to give the plaintiff and Judge Judy some injuries herself.  

 

Ummm, that kid's name was Van de Weird (and the announcer kept pronouncing it as VanDEEEweird)??  I loved when JJ gave the girl relationship advice: "this is as good as it gets."  But seriously, if you know that you bought concert tickets from Craigslist, some dude in the next dorm, or "a friend of a friend," then you know that the so-called discount may be a telltale sign of a huge scam.  Those kids needed to stay home and accept that they were softheaded to buy from "Joe."  

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It seemed like I missed part of Faux-nye West suing Keylolo Kardashian for a washer and dryer, and Keylolo was like, "so now my kids have to go without a washer and dryer"? Girl, bye.

 

The case with the dating couple suing over the tickets. How did that guy pronounce his last name? Vandeweird? Vandyweir? Strangest last name I've heard in a while.

 

The Mah Lil Piggy case went on a little long. Lady, it's not your pig anymore! Breed another pig! It's not like he was going to kill the pig and then smoke that ass up like I would've done. Had she said it was her pig and she wanted it back, I would've started fucking with her, like, "girl, had I known a few hours ago you wanted him back. We just got through eating him and let me tell you, that shit was good than a mug. Girl, I'm gon' be straight for the rest of the day, do you hear me? I had me 'bout two sandwiches, shiiiiit. I'm full as hell."

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"IT'S NOT YOUR PIG!!!!!!!!" (lather, rinse, repeat, pop those bejeweled little old lady hands around your mouth like a megaphone Judge Judy!!!)

 

Did anybody notice the weird proportions on the plaintiff in the Eyeball Eating Pitbull case? I saw her come in and (God help me) thought "Okay, dude looks like a lady". Then she had a soft little voice. Then I saw the close up and she looked like she could have broken that pitbull in half with her earlobes - then they backed up to full length and she has a skinny little bottom. She looked like Starla from Napoleon Dynamite (http://napoleondynamite.wikia.com/wiki/File:Starla.jpg)

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1st new ep don't care. Don't care in the least. Already forgot what it was about.

 

Now the 2nd new ep, case1: Give the man his damn washer and dryer. Judy was dead on. How the hell are you going to have me paying for something in your damn house? Okay. He's a cheater cheater pumpkin eater. What in the hell does that have to do with the man still paying for merchandise he doesn't have? Girl go on.

 

Case2: The pitbull w/opposable thumbs opening sliding doors. (By the way, all I kept thinking was...that commercial you see late at night w/the screen that has magnets that make it "clink" together...!) Anyways, the pics of here eye were horrific. Why did this lady agree to go on tv to defend this bullshit? Other than to get Judge Judy to pay the bills for her. That's all I got. She can't have thought for 1 GD second that she wasn't responsible.

 

Case3: They deserved their money back for the fake ass tickets. I do not understand though, in this day and age, who still buys tickets they can't verify as real 1st? These sorts of scenarios always seem to end the same.

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Maybe I wasn't paying attention, but it seemed like the pig lady should have been having a beef with Jessica....

 

Oh, you were paying attention. The gooch-eyed Leslie (looking a wee bit porcine herself) is a scam artist who peddles her animals to total strangers, not bothering to check them out and just itching to get money in her sweaty little trotter. Dumb as a box of rocks, she had no idea that the person who violated her contract was the elusive and equally stupid Jessica, who apparently only realized she had a mortgage payment AFTER buying a pet she never should have gotten. Actually, it seems Jessica just got the animal thinking she could flip it for a higher price. The bitch got bills to pay, doncha know?

 

Washer/dryer kerfluffle: I so can understand why JJ is fed up with these idiots playing house and then expecting to be entitled to all the rights of couples who actually bother to get married. Giggling fool has no washer/dryer for her kids? Tough shit. Go buy some, stupid.

 

The next case dealt with a bad cleaning service from a 17-year-old on Craigslist (duh)....

 

Odd that the only wise words we've ever heard in the hall came from said 17 year old, since even she has enough sense to think that anyone who would hire HER to watch their house and pets must be a fool. After listening to the plaintiff, I totally agree.

Edited by AngelaHunter
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This forum is just so cool.  Legal learnin' and geography all in one!  Yea, verily, QuinnM I am in Houston battening the hatches for the arctic freeze (down to the 50s tonight! Gadzooks!)  I can not even imagine what it is like in Minnesota. Seriously.  Stay warm and safe, my friend! (And all of you in between us!)

 

The Pig case was just so dumb. She really thought her beef (heh) was with the kind, friendly, new pig parent? I realize not everyone on the planet can qualify for Mensa, but really, was she that dumb, or just delusional? If we had had "It's not your pig!" on the drinking game list, can you imagine the shape we'd all be in? (But QuinnM would be feeling warmer!)

 

I must be getting old. The concert tickets case was another one I just could not keep up with. I understand the point of the case, but the questioning and answering, such as it was, just kept going 'round and 'round, and I had to keep backing things up to figure out what was going on.

 

And the cat sitter did indeed appear to be suffering from too much catnip. Loved her description of her job. Hope she made it home okay. Plaintiff had an interest in getting her to the court; not so much in getting her home.

 

O/T - circumstances are such that I don't get much adult conversation lately, so really love having y'all here! This is a great group of fans, and really funny.  Hugs all around.  <3

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Aw c'mon, I wanted to know what concert these losers were paying hundreds of dollars to see.

My mad Googling skills* tells us they attended the Ultra Music Festival in Miami. A bunch of DJs and, I assume, bunches of drugs. I am old and hate that music. **

*Not a statement of fact.

** Fact.

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Was there a BOGO sale this week-end on arrogant people who think they can freely lace their contracts with unreasonable clauses or rewrite them as they wish?

 

I wonder how many people the glassy-eyed landlord managed to convince with her argument of "it's in my lease" so that they accepted her abusive interpretation and amendments to the document. Many people cave in easily when faced with people in authority waving what they claim is a valid legal document, even though her version of a lease would probably be voided in a flash by a court. But that face would probably intimidate a good number of tenants; she looked like she fell face down into a pack of Botox-filled syringes.

 

As for the porcine caper, I think that the real pig in that case was the seller because she wanted to sell the same animal twice, at no extra expense to her. She also made the unforgivable move of involving Canada in her machinations; we are nice people, we do not deserve to be sullied by such scammers (we have enough of our own this side of the border).

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I was so excited for the pig case because i thought it'd be something new. I should know better. Typical greedy breeder who doesn't give a rat's ass about the actual animals adding a bunch of ridiculous clauses to a contract. Petunia couldn't get off my screen fast enough. She's a pig breeding pigs. How appropriate.

The washer/dryer case was more of the same as well, with the added twist of "won't somebody think of the children?" How are those kids supposed to survive without a washer and dryer? By the way, if he financed it through Conn's that place is barely a step above Rent-A-Center. They recently opened one here, and the ads promise they can finance anyone. So he's probably paying steep interest on those appliances she feels so entitled to have.

I almost wept when the plaintiff mentioned his pension. If I had stayed in the Army. I'd be drawing one by now myself. I didn't want to do another war tour after having done three. But a little part of me regrets not sticking it out for 14 more years and earning a pension. At least the GI Bill helped me get my degree and have a nice civilian career. Anywho... Happy Veteran's Day, everyone!

That high as a kite teenager who seems to think the plaintiff deserved to have her shit stolen was a piece of work. I wish JJ had questioned her more only to see her get a verbal beatdown for being so irresponsible. I understood the ruling, but I think we've seen similar cases before in which JJ rules for the plaintiff since the defendant had a duty to care for the stuff and not let a bunch of thieves in the house. Oh well. I don't know why the plaintiff didn't just file a homeowners claim. Oh, that's right. JJ litigants never have insurance.

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