S08.E16: Sandi and Vivian

[Tara Ariano]

A woman teeters on bankruptcy due to gift hoarding and a grandmother risks losing custody of her grandsons.

[Primetimer]

One hoarder thinks she's Mrs. Claus; the other just wants to give her grandkids a home.

Read the story

[auntieminem]

This one made me cry more than once.  Poor Maddox, such a sweet and sad little boy.  I was glad to see he and Vivian were going to therapy.  I wish he could be with his little brother.  

 

I have a feeling Sandi is going to re-hoard that place.  Not sure what is wrong with Santa, he didn't seem to be much help and kind of an ass.

[Josiah Bounderby]

Sandi and Mr. Claus drove me up the fricking wall. Denial, denial, avoidance, anger, and then everything is neatly tied up with a Christmas-related bromide or a pretty little tear!

I find it significant that Sandi is using aftercare funds for organizational help. What she and her husband need is therapy.

[auntieminem]

I saw on the Hoarder's FB page  the daughter said that Sandi and Santa were doing better and have done a lot more with the after care help.  Their organizer also posted how good they were doing.  

[kittyglitter]

I've often pondered what life situations would drive me to hoard, and Vivian's reason for hoarding was almost something I found excusable. I am glad Heather is "living elsewhere", as she certainly doesn't need to be on the premises with that precious little boy. SHE is the one who is failing those children, not Vivian.

An "Intervention" crossover into the next hour would've been interesting to see here. On a shallow note, the Department of Hair Protective Services desperately needs to take custody of Dr. Zaz's mane for a mandatory keratin treatment, STAT. I cried for it.

Regarding Sandi, she just struck me as one of those phony-baloney folks that are obsessed with holidays because they have the need to "create joy" where it's really not needed. I know the type; I call them "self decorators", so named because they actually use their own person as a decorating canvas, with the hideous holiday earrings and sweatshirts. You know, the people (especially women) who obsess over holidays in an attempt to "spread joy" but it just comes off as a pathetic attempt to hide how sad their lives really are? Yeah, that.

Also, wish we'd see more of Dr. Dave! Oh, and I would have no problem being the recipient of the kitty umbrella. The only redeeming quality of that mess!

Edited April 4, 2016 by kittyglitter

[Tosia]

Great advice for Dr Z, kittyglitter!

I would add a hair coloring to a darker natural blonde with caramel highlights so she would look younger. And a make up makeover to coordinate with the new hair. And revoke her pass to the tanning salon.

Sandi? Idk. Seems unlikable. The rudeness to Tolin and Jeff, and her daughter, was telling of her true nature. Maybe the hoard gave her daughter an excuse to stay away. The other daughter was unfortunate looking.

Hopefully the show continues to help Maddox and Vivian cope with their selves, and distance from the druggie daughter. Ridiculous. I wonder what she's using as an excuse for her drug use now that the house is cleaned up. Hope Vivian gets to an AlAnon/ACOA group for relatives of users.

[Cherrio]

The Claus's looked really ill, not to mention what we saw. Its that certain look in the eyes.

 

I got the feeling this episode so very cleaned up, smoothed over and wella.....both homes are clean.   I also feel the hoarding will start right back up in both houses.

 

I also agree about Dr. Zazio's make-up. She looks like she is wearing 3 layers of that Bye Bye foundation, which in my opinion looks like corpse make-up.

[Pepper Mostly]

Regarding Sandi, she just struck me as one of those phony-baloney folks that are obsessed with holidays because they have the need to "create joy" where it's really not needed. I know the type; I call them "self decorators", so named because they actually use their own person as a decorating canvas, with the hideous holiday earrings and sweatshirts. You know, the people (especially women) who obsess over holidays in an attempt to "spread joy" but it just comes off as a pathetic attempt to hide how sad their lives really are? Yeah, that.

 

I just kept yelling "its not a frickin gift if you don't actually GIVE it to someone!" at my TV. She just kept up with the "oh, that's a gift! I'm so generous! I love to give gifts! I know, I know, I just can't help it, I'm so generous and kind hearted, look, here's something I'm going to give someone! As a gift! Its sitting here in my living room, where its been for 15 years, but its a gift! See how nice and thoughtful of others I am?" She fell back on that over and over, never seeming to make the connection that a gift has to actually be given. And in the end she was just your typical garden variety hoarder--self centered, angry, combative, manipulative--just all dressed up in red and white bunting.

 

Maddox was adorable and it was great to see him smile. And that poor little brother is actually named Anakin? Oy.

[funky-rat]

Sandi was a lot like my late mother-in-law.  Justifying keeping junk around that she really wanted by saying it was a gift for someone.  It also gave her the ability to be able to dig through her junk piles and hand off stuff when she needed to smooth something over, or if she forgot someone, etc.  And she justified that.  But more often than not, "Look at this I got for (xyz)!" sat there forever, and was something she really wanted herself.  My dad plays Santa Claus all the time.  They do not have a house full of ungiven gifts.  For all of her mild hoarder issues, my mom has a shelf in her garage where she puts items she feels would be good gifts for an unexpected need for one.  When it's full, she stops putting things on there.  And she pulls from it all year (I have pulled from her stash too).  They are generally items she wins in raffles, or were premium freebies, or something similar.  She doesn't spend much of anything on them.

 

**For continuity, because I hate incomplete thoughts:  My late mother-in-law was very much one of those "LOOK AT HOW GENEROUS I AM!!  EVEN WHEN I'M CONSTANTLY BROKE AND HAVE NO MONEY I WILL GIVE YOU STUFF!" type of people.  Just like Sandi.

Edited April 4, 2016 by funky-rat

[StatisticalOutlier]

I'm an intermittent watcher.  Do we not call her Dr. Tonya Harding any more? 

 

 

For all of her mild hoarder issues, my mom has a shelf in her garage where she puts items she feels would be good gifts for an unexpected need for one. 

 

Argh.  This whole gift-giving racket drives me crazy.  To me, there should never be an unexpected need for a gift.  I love it when I think of something that someone would just love, or vice versa, but the whole obligation part of it is just annoying.  I'd much rather someone see something and think, "Oh, Statistical Outlier would just LOVE this" instead of, "It's Statistical Outlier's birthday--I have to buy a gift and will pick whatever looks best from what I see right now." 

 

 

Sandi? Idk. Seems unlikable. The rudeness to Tolin and Jeff, and her daughter, was telling of her true nature. Maybe the hoard gave her daughter an excuse to stay away. The other daughter was unfortunate looking.

 

That one daughter had eyes that were unusually wide-spaced, but still looked pretty normal.  That other one--I was taken aback but then wondered if she'd maybe had a stroke, and I felt guilty.  Then again, an awful lot of the people on this show have, shall we say, interesting features.

 

 

Also, wish we'd see more of Dr. Dave!

 

Agree.  I enjoyed all of his comments about not wanting to be the guy who ruined Christmas.  I'm sure he's seen a LOT in his career, and now this.

[funky-rat]

I'm an intermittent watcher.  Do we not call her Dr. Tonya Harding any more? 

 

 

 

Argh.  This whole gift-giving racket drives me crazy.  To me, there should never be an unexpected need for a gift.  I love it when I think of something that someone would just love, or vice versa, but the whole obligation part of it is just annoying.  I'd much rather someone see something and think, "Oh, Statistical Outlier would just LOVE this" instead of, "It's Statistical Outlier's birthday--I have to buy a gift and will pick whatever looks best from what I see right now." 

 

 

Our family - especially on her side - are crappy about invites.  They get sent late, or they don't get sent at all, and you get a phone call inviting you to something tomorrow.  A last minute invite to a bridal shower, or someone did her a favor and she feels the need to do a "thank you" gift.  But again - it's one shelf.  That's it.  She is good about that.

[LittleIggy]

Am I the only one who wondered whether Sandi's younger daughter was really the daughter of the older daughter? You know, where the grandparents become the parents and the mother becomes the "sister." Just a thought I had.

Matt was so sweet with Maddox. That poor kid so needed his own room. Hope it stays that way. Yep, I shuddered when I heard the name "Anakin"! I hope he insists on being called Darth when he is older.

Edited April 4, 2016 by LittleIggy

[Tosia]

Regarding the gift-giving hoarder, Sandi was kiddong hetself. I used to buy all year for family for Christmas and birthdays, and with parents and 3 siblings, and nephews, I still only used one shelf in the hall closet. Over the years, we moved away from family, altho I still wd take stuff back when I visited abt 3x per year.

Now both parents are gone, and I won't be going back except once a year. Amazon now sends my gifts postage free with prime membership. Less is more.

Edited April 4, 2016 by Tosia

[stillhere1900]

Great advice for Dr Z, kittyglitter!

I would add a hair coloring to a darker natural blonde with caramel highlights so she would look younger. And a make up makeover to coordinate with the new hair. And revoke her pass to the tanning salon.

Sandi? Idk. Seems unlikable. The rudeness to Tolin and Jeff, and her daughter, was telling of her true nature. Maybe the hoard gave her daughter an excuse to stay away. The other daughter was unfortunate looking.

Hopefully the show continues to help Maddox and Vivian cope with their selves, and distance from the druggie daughter. Ridiculous. I wonder what she's using as an excuse for her drug use now that the house is cleaned up. Hope Vivian gets to an AlAnon/ACOA group for relatives of users.

 

Ye, I also thought the other daughter was very unfortunate looking.

[Mrsjumbo]

In the Harry Potter novels, Rufus Scrimgeour is described as "looking rather like an old lion", & I think of that whenever I see Dr Zazio.

Those were the most unpleasant Mr & Mrs Claus I've ever seen!

Maddox was a sweet kid. So sad to see him weep over a basic need, a bedroom. He really was cute with his younger brother too.

Anakin. Could not stop eye rolling!

My mom does a "gift closet" too. Mostly stuff from her church rummage sale. Anything she gives me has a mildewy smell. I hate to say it, but she was all excited one time that a purse she bought had a disposable swim diaper in it! And I could use it for my DS! Yeah, that went straight in the garbage.

[auntjess]

Did Sandi not try to sell some of the things, like the rock tumbler.  Her hoard was notable for the lack of vermin, so since they needed the money, I thought they might do a yardsale.
 

[AuntTora]

That "puff pastry fish cutter" prominent in one of the interviews says it all. I'm sure it's never been out of the box. Because it's a PUFF PASTRY FISH CUTTER (whatever that is)! ARGH! Off I go to make a serious effort at cleaning out my kitchen of pointless junk. Novelty coffee cup shelf? I'm coming for you!

[Reo]

I'm located in the PNW and I go through Port Angeles occasionally as I have friends there, it's a very small place.  The fact that Hoarders was there was of intense interest to the community, with their Santa schtick, Sandi and Ed are well-known.  Their house is on a main drag and I drive by it all the time.

 

It always has the drapes up on all the windows now so a passerby can see inside (not the case in the past), and everything looks neatly arranged.  There is no crap in the yard.  I was hoping that things have changed for Sandi and Ed as well, but time will tell.  I did not "feel" Sandi's epiphany on the show - it looked to me like she became aware of all the eyes on her rather than the necessity to abandon her crap collection.

 

One general consensus my friend that lives there said was that folks that knew about the episode being filmed avoided the Goodwill like the plague for a month.  Everyone knows what those houses are like inside.  My aunt was a hoarder and my family had to clean out her hoard after her death in her pile - it all stank, even the new stuff in boxes.  I took home a brand-new 10 year old unused Cuisinart (my aunt apparently lived almost entirely on TV dinners, cigarettes, and cough syrup according to the piles of trash, she clearly had no need of it) but I had to throw it away because it stunk, even after washing it down with a variety of cleaners.

 

But personally, I would have liked that rock tumbler.  And I would have used it!

[funky-rat]

That "puff pastry fish cutter" prominent in one of the interviews says it all. I'm sure it's never been out of the box. Because it's a PUFF PASTRY FISH CUTTER (whatever that is)! ARGH! Off I go to make a serious effort at cleaning out my kitchen of pointless junk. Novelty coffee cup shelf? I'm coming for you!

Apparently it's like a cookie cutter, except you use it to cut shapes out of puff pastry (fish shapes, in this case).  Judging from the photos I saw when I looked it up, it can be handy for making cute fish pies, and the like.  Man, doesn't EVERYONE need one of those?

[swanjun]

The brave face that kid is putting on in that one image is killing me.

[Reo]

I don't often see a kid I would be willing to adopt, but I would take in Maddox.  I think Matt felt the same.  I've never seen him so affected by a client.

[operalover]

Apparently it's like a cookie cutter, except you use it to cut shapes out of puff pastry (fish shapes, in this case).  Judging from the photos I saw when I looked it up, it can be handy for making cute fish pies, and the like.  Man, doesn't EVERYONE need one of those?

Wrong thread but I'm sure Jen Arnold of the little couple has one. She loves buying "one-time or once every 3 years" type gadgets. They have matching aprons that embroided with "baking cookies today for Valentines Day because its raining and my baseball game was cancelled" aprons.

[Mojeaux]

then wondered if she'd maybe had a stroke

That’s what I thought the second I saw her, and that perhaps the rest of her appearance was because she couldn’t keep up her former looks. If the sister was representative, I can see how a stroke (or Bell’s palsy) would affect such things. She also spoke slowly and deliberately, but what came out was very smart and well-thought-out.

[StatisticalOutlier]

But personally, I would have liked that rock tumbler.  And I would have used it!

 

Yep, that's what they all say.

[Reo]

Yep, that's what they all say.

 

Actually, I would!  I'm an artist and I make beads, and I've been planning on buying one!

[StatisticalOutlier]

Yep, that's what they all say.

[RCharter]

This one made me cry more than once.  Poor Maddox, such a sweet and sad little boy.  I was glad to see he and Vivian were going to therapy.  I wish he could be with his little brother.  

 

I have a feeling Sandi is going to re-hoard that place.  Not sure what is wrong with Santa, he didn't seem to be much help and kind of an ass.

I just can't understand the logic of someone who has a hoard house saying that its full of gifts.  How can your house be full of gifts that you've never given to anyone?  I absolutely think that Sandi is going to re-hoard that place....right around the holidays, or right after the holidays when the sales are REALLY good.  I think Santa just wanted some magic wand that was going to render his place clean, and it was taking much too long for his liking.

 

My biggest issue with a rock tumbler is I think its just a doo-dad creator.  I enjoy a shiny rock as much as the next person, but really, what am I going to do with a bunch of pretty rocks?  Something that creates knick knacks is just not good for a crafty hoarder.

[StatisticalOutlier]

My biggest issue with a rock tumbler is I think its just a doo-dad creator.  I enjoy a shiny rock as much as the next person, but really, what am I going to do with a bunch of pretty rocks?

 

Reo is so insistent it can be used for making art that I'm on the verge of believing it.  I never did believe that Mrs. Claus was going to give all that shit away as presents, no matter how many times she said it. 

 

I'm still going to keep my eye on that Reo, though.

[RCharter]

Reo is so insistent it can be used for making art that I'm on the verge of believing it.  I never did believe that Mrs. Claus was going to give all that shit away as presents, no matter how many times she said it. 

 

I'm still going to keep my eye on that Reo, though.

LOL, if I had a nickel for every hoarder that had an "art project" in the works.....I would have a hoarder house of nickels.

 

I bet you no one wants whatever Mrs. Claus is giving away.  I do not want a "Party Gras" set that has been sitting in the bottom of a pile of crap.

[RCharter]

On further reflection....I think it would have been absolutely genius if they had offered to call every person that Mrs. Claus was going to "gift" that stuff to and had them come down and pick it up.  Oh, you're gonna give that umbrella to Maybelline?  I just called her and she said she can come down and pick it up....oh, whats that you say, you're not so sure now?

[Reo]

Hmmm....well, you see that picture of cherry blossoms in my pic?  I was the one that drew it in colored pencils.  Not that you can actually see any details or anything.  But I assure you, it's quite good.

 

But to be honest, I've pulled myself away from incipient hoarderism by a combination of watching this show and dealing with a real life hoard belonging to a relative.  I'll take my cure any way I can find it.

 

*walks of whistling to sort her stuff and re-organize

Oh, and BTW, drove by Sandi's house a couple of days after shows aired.  Windows all wide open and so were drapes.  Looks like she has something to prove.

 

Also, no item from a stinky hoard is going to be worth using for any reason, that stink follows no matter how hard you try to clean item.   Source: a 10-year old brand-new Cuisinart from my aunt's hoard.  I threw it away, because it smelled like death and I wasn't going to fix any food in it.

[stillhere1900]

On further reflection....I think it would have been absolutely genius if they had offered to call every person that Mrs. Claus was going to "gift" that stuff to and had them come down and pick it up.  Oh, you're gonna give that umbrella to Maybelline?  I just called her and she said she can come down and pick it up....oh, whats that you say, you're not so sure now?

 dude, you don't know how many times I've wished the therapist would do just that. All those hoarders saying they can't get rid of items because they're "saving it for friends or family".  

I was watching either this show or Hoarders: Buried Alive  and this old hoarder was saying that he couldn't get rid of piles of boards and a edger because he was going to "edge the driveway with the boards and plant flowers. His son was kinda losing his shit because the old man wasn't really getting rid of anything outside, so the son took all that wood and the edger and said to his dad... "it's right there, now you can start on edging the driveway"  "do it"

 

Of course his father made an excuse why he couldn't 

[ChicagoCita]

On 4/4/2016 at 4:15 PM, LittleIggy said:

Yep, I shuddered when I heard the name "Anakin"! I hope he insists on being called Darth when he is older.

I have a great-nephew named Anakin. It's one of those instances where I just tell the parents how cute he is and literally hold my hand over my mouth to stop saying more. Because I have a lot of opinions about it (that don't need to be heard by family).