Erin and Chad: Fifty Shades of Pink

[cereality]

Seeing Erin packing for the trip to Bill/Jane's versus seeing Carlin pack (and Josie - not that she goes to her grandparents except the big July 4 and Thanksgiving) showed how much of a useless child Carlin is. You know Carlin's idea of - OMG I baked for Jane - would've been a dozen slice and bake cookies with Layla sitting on the counter with her feet up and Zade sitting on the counter in his diaper.

Meanwhile Erin talked about how Jane was the grandma who brought them all the baked treats growing up and now she can't cook as much. And then girlfriend proceeded to show - 2 tupperwares full of chocolate chip cookies; multiple pumpkin breads; 2 chocolate cakes; and sour cream pound cakes bc that's Jane's favorite. With everything individually packaged and put into storage bags/boxes so Bill/Jane can just pull out 1-2 cookies or slices of cake when they want them without having the hassle of defrosting an entire cake. And packaged in such a way that once they got to the farm, all they had to do was unload the cooler contents right into Bill/Jane's freezer. Not be all like OMG Jane don't you have saran wrap - WHERE IS IT!?

I assume she also cooked them some extra meals while on the farm and froze them. And Chad likely took care of any repair work etc. that they may need.

Last time they were there - just 1-2 months ago - Trace was doing yard work and this time he also seemed very sweet - helping Bill exercise. He was patiently waiting multiple times as Bill got up from the table, handing him his cane or holding his cane when Bill needed someplace to put it, at times encouraging him to take big steps or 2 more steps or whatever, on the floor getting Bill's sneakers on etc.

Cue Carlin, Evan, and Law - OMG WE have to make breakfast bc the grandparents don't get up at 7 am to make it anymore?? OMG where is the toaster? How does it work? And then tasking Tiffany with making eggs and cinnamon roles while they take credit. Seems like Tiff cooked all the meals while they were there bc at one point she said Jane had said she was craving cranberry sauce so Tiff made some along with whatever chicken and vegetable she cooked for dinner that night. Let's be real Carlin, Evan, and Law were there for content as Law needed to film some music thing on the farm + Carlin needed to cry every 2 seconds about how her kids are re-living her childhood.

Meanwhile Erin, Michael, Trace, Alyssa seem to go to help how they can whether helping Bill/Jane directly or cleaning, repair/yard work, or cooking, grocery shopping etc.

I'm actually surprised we haven't seen much of Zach while it seems like Erin, Trace, and Michael have gone multiple times in recent months. Seems like Zach skips July 4 with the whole family there and sometimes even skips Thanksgiving, but goes for a trip with just his 5 kids when they are going on their annual beach vacation. He is supposed to be the closest to Bill so I'm surprised he isn't there helping out some. Though I do wonder if he finds it really hard for Bill to not remember him and is avoiding it a bit more than Erin, Trace, Michael etc. Evan mentioned that Bill asked who Carlin was every single time he walked into the room the entire time they visited, and we saw multiple clips of Carlin reintroducing herself and her kids, even Law introducing Carlin's kids to Bill etc.

Edited April 27 by cereality

[GeeGolly]

I think Josie usually skips the July 4th visit because its Kelton's birthday, although they went last year. For some reason I thought the Balkas only saw Janie and Papa Bill on ILY day.

Not too surprising the older sisters are the helpers. Its what they always done.

[cereality]

5 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

I think Josie usually skips the July 4th visit because its Kelton's birthday, although they went last year. For some reason I thought the Balkas only saw Janie and Papa Bill on ILY day.

Not too surprising the older sisters are the helpers. Its what they always done.

Yeah Kelton obviously spends his birthday with his family. I think they usually skip Thanksgiving too - as they tend to want to be with the Balkas more. So it may really just be ILY where they see Bill/Jane usually.

Though last year J&K did go to South Carolina for Thanksgiving and Kelton brought his grill and was responsible for the turkeys. I wonder if they were specifically asked to come. As Jane gets older and can't put together Thanksgiving for 50+ people - I wouldn't have been surprised if it came down to - we aren't doing Thanksgiving at the farm anymore unless there are people who will reliably cook and clean it ALL up - we all know Kelly ain't that person. I'm pretty sure Erin, Alyssa, and Michael didn't attend as they all went to their inlaws/stayed home and all 3 have recently been visiting Bill/Jane when they can have one on one time, not with the herd. So I wouldn't have been surprised if G&K specifically asked Josie/Kelton to attend and for Kelton to cook and he agreed for the sake of her ailing grandparents.

True the older sisters are the helpers. But I stand with my theory that the oldest kids have a different bond with Bill/Jane; not that Trace is one of the oldest - but he's in the middle and likely sought out that bond more than Carlin, Josie etc. I really think Bill/Jane were the safe space for the oldest kids + Trace as they were ignored as G&K popped out another kid yearly. Jane was clearly the grandma who doted on them, brought them their favorite treats when she visited - whereas Gil was like you can get 1 large soda for 8 kids and each have 1-2 sips as a treat on an outing (per Zach). And Erin and Alyssa have shown pics before of Bill teaching them to ride tractors and do other farm things and just sitting and talking to them - which Gil clearly did not have time to do, nor did he care to make time.

[GeeGolly]

So it seems the visit to see the grandparents included Tori and her family, G&L and their 3 youngest, in addition to Trace, Lydia and baby and they Paine clan. At least there was a large RV parked in the driveway.

A total of 8 adults and 14(?) kids. That is a whole lot of people.

[Meow Mix]

I was just about to mention that while the kids seem to be rotating in and out to help Bill and Jane, that Gil and Kelly are nowhere to be found.  So they finally showed up.  I wonder if they did anything.  I give Erin a lot of credit.  She went from being unable to cook when she was first married to preparing individually packaged items for Bill and Jane to have in their freezer.  Such a contrast from Carlin and Lawson who just went to get content for their sad influencer existence. 

[cereality]

FWIW it did seem like Gil was helping. In Trace's YT it looked like Gil had gone grocery shopping and was bringing bags in to stock Bill/Jane's kitchen. Kelly - lol - helping ain't her thing. Only videos I saw of her involved her holding some child squealing.

And it does seem like the kids are sticking to a rotation rather than let's all come at once and party party. Trace mentioned that they wouldn't get to see Bobby/Tori and their crew as Trace/Lydia were leaving before Bobby/Tori were arriving. And it seems like he only overlapped with Erin/Chad for 1-2 days and that was because Erin had asked if he'd stay 1-2 extra days so they could meet up. Trace said that he and Lydia had arrived a few days earlier, stayed with Bill/Jane and then stayed an extra 1-2 days to see Erin/Chad (and G&K though they live locally so whatever) and were leaving, hoping to return again in June.

Interesting that Zach is the only one who has been TOTALLY quiet about this - as in not posting when he's visiting, not posting videos of Bill demonstrating his dementia asking Zach who he is (I assume so - we've seen him be reintroduced to Carlin, Trace, Erin).

Whit posted a few still pics yesterday saying they just visited the farm this week. But no pics of Bill/Jane - just a few pics of the farm itself. And interestingly they stayed in a hotel - so she posted a few hotel pics with her kids. She did say it's heartbreaking to see Bill's decline with dementia; and that Zach took measurements at the house and is figuring out how to build a ramp - I guess where the front steps are - and hopes to do that next time.

Zach has always been really close to Bill and said he looks up to him, so I wonder if it's all a bit too much for him. Like he wants to visit but it's upsetting enough that he needs nightly break at a hotel. And for once it's too heartbreaking to having Bill ask who he is - to want to show that to everyone on social media. 

[AstridM]

2 hours ago, cereality said:

FWIW it did seem like Gil was helping. In Trace's YT it looked like Gil had gone grocery shopping and was bringing bags in to stock Bill/Jane's kitchen. Kelly - lol - helping ain't her thing. Only videos I saw of her involved her holding some child squealing.

And it does seem like the kids are sticking to a rotation rather than let's all come at once and party party. Trace mentioned that they wouldn't get to see Bobby/Tori and their crew as Trace/Lydia were leaving before Bobby/Tori were arriving. And it seems like he only overlapped with Erin/Chad for 1-2 days and that was because Erin had asked if he'd stay 1-2 extra days so they could meet up. Trace said that he and Lydia had arrived a few days earlier, stayed with Bill/Jane and then stayed an extra 1-2 days to see Erin/Chad (and G&K though they live locally so whatever) and were leaving, hoping to return again in June.

Interesting that Zach is the only one who has been TOTALLY quiet about this - as in not posting when he's visiting, not posting videos of Bill demonstrating his dementia asking Zach who he is (I assume so - we've seen him be reintroduced to Carlin, Trace, Erin).

Whit posted a few still pics yesterday saying they just visited the farm this week. But no pics of Bill/Jane - just a few pics of the farm itself. And interestingly they stayed in a hotel - so she posted a few hotel pics with her kids. She did say it's heartbreaking to see Bill's decline with dementia; and that Zach took measurements at the house and is figuring out how to build a ramp - I guess where the front steps are - and hopes to do that next time.

Zach has always been really close to Bill and said he looks up to him, so I wonder if it's all a bit too much for him. Like he wants to visit but it's upsetting enough that he needs nightly break at a hotel. And for once it's too heartbreaking to having Bill ask who he is - to want to show that to everyone on social media. 

Good for Zach for choosing NOT to exploit his grandparents on SM.

[3 is enough]

Whitney posted some church photos in her stories today. She linked her dress which is from  the boutique. It is just awful. Looks like something a 6 year old would wear. Two tiered puffy miniskirt  and big puffed sleeves and ties up with a bow in the back. Does absolutely nothing for her. 

[BitterApple]

4 minutes ago, 3 is enough said:

Whitney posted some church photos in her stories today. She linked her dress which is from  the boutique. It is just awful. Looks like something a 6 year old would wear. Two tiered puffy miniskirt  and big puffed sleeves and ties up with a bow in the back. Does absolutely nothing for her. 

I saw that. She looked ridiculous. 

[GeeGolly]

"Charles" turned 9. I guess she's going with using Carson's proper name to match with William. I really thought William would have ended up being Liam instead.

[Salacious Kitty]

Carson wants to be called Charles. That came out in a video a few months ago. Granny still called him Carson in her birthday tribute. 

[AstridM]

1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

"Charles" turned 9. I guess she's going with using Carson's proper name to match with William. I really thought William would have ended up being Liam instead.

I wonder what name the kid prefers?

Just now, AstridM said:

I wonder what name the kid prefers?

NM. For some reason I’m not able to edit my posts 😡.

[GeeGolly]

3 hours ago, Salacious Kitty said:

Carson wants to be called Charles. That came out in a video a few months ago. Granny still called him Carson in her birthday tribute. 

I didn't know that. The last I remember is Erin wishing she had called him Charles from the beginning.

[Salacious Kitty]

Yup. This is the kid's choice. 

[ozziemom]

I think KJ has to consult a list/spreadsheet for the important dates and names for the Bates clan and she hasn’t had time to update Carson to Charles. Or she just doesn’t remember since he’s soooooo far away.

[Salacious Kitty]

3 minutes ago, ozziemom said:

I think KJ has to consult a list/spreadsheet for the important dates and names for the Bates clan and she hasn’t had time to update Carson to Charles. Or she just doesn’t remember since he’s soooooo far away.

She was just in FL visiting Erin. She should have known better.

[ozziemom]

Just now, Salacious Kitty said:

She was just in FL visiting Erin. She should have known better.

You’re assuming KJ notices things other than the latest blessing and posing for a picture holding said blessing, lol.

[andromeda331]

9 hours ago, ozziemom said:

You’re assuming KJ notices things other than the latest blessing and posing for a picture holding said blessing, lol.

Yeah, that's all she cares about.

[ranchgirl]

Erin and Chad went to OK for a Paine sibling wedding and took Carson, Willian and Brooklyn with them.  So glad Brooklyn wasn't left behind.  I wonder who stayed back home with those that were.

Also, they stated they had some updates they would announce later.  Hmmm? 

[Heathen]

If they can take three, why not take the other three, too? 

[RebeccatheWriter]

3 hours ago, Heathen said:

If they can take three, why not take the other three, too? 

I'm somewhat impressed they took Brooklyn. That girl is clearly the black sheep of the Paine's group. William is probably still nursing and Carson is Erin's emotional support child. 

[3 is enough]

IMHO if you can’t afford to take ALL your children to family events you have too many. 🙄

[ozziemom]

Just saw on YouTube that the Paine family is moving again. Asking for prayers (and maybe a cheap rental) from their followers. They have to leave the house they are currently in, sounds like owner won’t let them renew their lease. Gee Chad, maybe you should get a real job so you could afford a house? They have spent a lot of time and probably money on two rentals with nothing to show for it. No clue where they are going. Erin clearly wants to be back in Tennessee but I think Chad is not on board. Unless of course, god tells him to.

[cereality]

So the mission is spreading God's word and seeking his kingdom and things like housing are just a "distraction" and they are praying hard and they know God will open a door. Uh brainwashed much? You're 37 years old. You have SIX kids. Housing is a "distraction"? Is food a distraction too? What on earth do you plan to do if a door doesn't open by December? Though I guess that's when we'd see them headed back to G&K's house or Chad's parents' house or Bill/Jane's house with 6 kids in tow.

Honestly long term I wouldn't be surprised if they ended up at Bill/Jane's - maybe not this move but a few moves down the road. Bill and Jane appear to have hundreds of acres of land as I think 2 of Gil's siblings have their own houses on the property. Perfect place for Chad/Erin to put up a prefab type home where they don't need to buy land. Obviously 37 year old glorified handyman making scripture cards for Etsy likely doesn't have the 50-100k for a prefab home and they don't believe in mortgages, nor is any bank giving a mortgage to someone who works sporadically. So this type of move would have to involve moving in with Bill/Jane for a few years as Chad does whatever he does to gather money and then build a house with teenage Carson by his side.

Can't imagine Jane loving the idea of living with 6 kids but as she gets older, I could see her relenting to having Erin there to help with Bill, cook every meal, clean etc. - or Erin's daughters for those tasks.

[BitterApple]

I knew this would happen eventually. When you grift and put your well-being in the hands of others, you're playing with fire. With everything going on now with the economy, inflation, upcoming election etc., people have to make decisions that best support their own bottom lines. Erin's landlord has bills to pay too, and he probably can't afford to give them cut-rate rent for the sake of Godliness and helping out sweet church friends. 

My guess is they won't find another property in Florida. It's too expensive and Erin and Chad aren't ideal tenants. The only employed spouse does sporadic handyman work, and comes with six kids and a menagerie of farm animals. I imagine any place willing to give them a chance would charge such an outrageous cleaning and security deposit that the Paines couldn't afford it if they robbed a bank. 

I agree Bill and Jane's is the best bet. I think Chad has too much pride to go crawling back to Tennessee. 

[cereality]

I wonder if going back to Tenn would be a problem for Erin too. I mean obviously Chad would feel like he was handing his testicles to Gil if he had to admit that they needed to live with G&K, so that's not an option. But even Chad taking on a job like he had when newlywed at that metal shop or getting an unlicensed contractor biz going again (which he gave to Trace so now he'd have to start another one or get back in with Trace; my sense is Trace gets along really well with Chad/Erin but he now has to think about providing for a family too). I mean even getting some gig in Tenn would mean going back to renting a property like the one they lived in before or the ones that Trace and Brandon/Michael live in now. Those are fine for 2 and 3 person families but with SIX kids!?

As much as Erin goes on about how much she misses Tenn, I think she'd constantly be comparing. While the feud is on with Whit, Carlin, and Katie - it isn't hard to figure out via social media and/or family gossip that Z&W took out a mortgage, bought a house with acreage, and renovated the whole house and made it upscale. And C&E have a relatively big house where they just put in a pool and drive a Tesla and a Jeep and vacation every 2 seconds, and they refer to this house as just their starter home. Josie and Kelton have a smaller renovated home and just bought land - so they'll be putting up a brand new house. Trav/Katie - he comes from money so they can live however they want.

Bobby/Tori - sure they have a more regular older home but Tori's husband was at least willing to take on a mortgage and get into a house and hold down a job to pay said mortgage so that housing his 5 kids isn't a "distraction."

IDK how these people are sleeping at like. They aren't just a 22 yr old married couple so whatever - they have SIX kids!? TBH their best bet is South Carolina under the guise of taking care of Bill/Jane. The rest of the family would be happy bc they would not have to keep up a rotation of someone heading down there weekly and Chad/Erin would save face while solving their longer term housing problem without having to admit that they're up $hit creek with 6 kids and a husband who won't work steadily.

I just don't think it happens NOW because I can't see Jane agreeing. It isn't any secret that she doesn't like the chaos of a house full of people. Granted Chad/Erin's kids aren't feral but they are still kids. Jane right now is lucid enough that I think she'd say no and/or Erin would know NOT to ask. But as Jane gets older, I think she'd relent if it meant someone there full time taking care of the grocery shopping, cooking and cleaning up after every meal, and Bill - and Erin and her 4 daughters could do all of that really well in a traditional fashion.

[Salacious Kitty]

I sucked it up and watched the video. They really have no plans for their future; they're flying by the seat of Chad's pants. His only because I think he is the decision maker. Erin could suggest Bill and Jane's place, but Chad world have to rubber stamp it. And if they don't wind up there, who knows? We don't know the state of their finances, but we do know they can't afford to buy. As mentioned, it's going by to be rough sledding trying to find a place to fit six kids that will also let Chad make modifications. 

[BitterApple]

Do Chad's parents have a big spread? Maybe that would be an option. I can't remember where the Paines are from. 

I agree it would be really hard for them to go back to Rocky Top and see the Bates siblings balling while they're stuffed in another tiny rental. FWIW, Bobby and Tori bought another house a while back, they're no longer in the starter home next to Z&W's old place. So yeah, even uber-Fundie Tori is doing better and Kelton is clearly paying Bobby well. 

Also if the feud is going strong with Carlin, it's going to burn hearing about everyone spending weekends at her pool while you and your kids are left out. Or watching Katie buy her umpteenth Louis bag while you're shopping at Goodwill. Someone like Michael may not genuinely care, but Erin would love to live the high life if she could. She was always an uppity princess. 

[Salacious Kitty]

I believe Chad's parents are still in Oklahoma. I don't know if they have extra land or rentals, etc. 

[GeeGolly]

Maybe they can build a nice small ADU for Janie and Bill and the Paines can live in the big house.

Eryn can cook, clean, do laundry and Chad can take care of the land and such.

Kind of a win-win.

[Salacious Kitty]

2 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Maybe they can build a nice small ADU for Janie and Bill and the Paines can live in the big house.

Eryn can cook, clean, do laundry and Chad can take care of the land and such.

Kind of a win-win.

It's probably their best bet, if Jane is amenable (not sure if Bill can make decisions like this at this point).

[Heathen]

I wonder if Chad and Erin will ever get it together and realize that "sweet friends" are not reliable sources of employment and housing. That her siblings are not burning in the fires of hell for taking out mortgages, just as their parents didn't. 

My guess is probably not. 

[GeeGolly]

I believe Chad tried to get a mortgage but was denied more than once.

[andromeda331]

Seriously, what does God have to do to convince Chad to get a real job? They want what her siblings have? Then get a damn job. They can't keep a house. Relying on sweet friends isn't working. Get a job. 

[65mickey]

The very idea that Erin and Chard would approach her grandparents about moving in and mooching off of them because Chard refuses to get a real job is unbelievable to me. But even worse is the suggestion that they take over the farm house and ask the grandparents to move to a small structure in the back yard. That would take balls. The farm house is where they have lived most of their adult lives. With Bill's dementia moving them from familiar surroundings would be upsetting. This reeks to me as we've screwed up our lives so how about you two provide us with a house. Nope how about you two stop having kids and get jobs like people do in the real world. 

Gill's sister and brother live on the property. I not so sure they would be on board with this.  

[GeeGolly]

53 minutes ago, 65mickey said:

The very idea that Erin and Chard would approach her grandparents about moving in and mooching off of them because Chard refuses to get a real job is unbelievable to me. But even worse is the suggestion that they take over the farm house and ask the grandparents to move to a small structure in the back yard. That would take balls. The farm house is where they have lived most of their adult lives. With Bill's dementia moving them from familiar surroundings would be upsetting. This reeks to me as we've screwed up our lives so how about you two provide us with a house. Nope how about you two stop having kids and get jobs like people do in the real world. 

Gill's sister and brother live on the property. I not so sure they would be on board with this.  

Having a small one floor home would be much easier for both Janie and Bill. They still would be in a familiar environment. Many retired couples prefer to down size at a certain age.

I think Erin's aunt and uncle would welcome the help. Especially basically having eyes on J&B at all times. E&C wouldn't have to have ownership of the home, they could pay the basic bills, but with no rent in return for caring for J&B.

[ranchgirl]

18 hours ago, Salacious Kitty said:

As mentioned, it's going by to be rough sledding trying to find a place to fit six kids that will also let Chad make modifications. 

They just need a 3 bedroom.  The girls  all share a room and once William is old enough, he'll move in with his BFF, brother Carson.  

When I read here they were moving, with no idea where, Mama Jane and Papa Bill's place is the first thing to pop up.  

[Salacious Kitty]

18 minutes ago, ranchgirl said:

They just need a 3 bedroom.  The girls  all share a room and once William is old enough, he'll move in with his BFF, brother Carson.  

When I read here they were moving, with no idea where, Mama Jane and Papa Bill's place is the first thing to pop up.  

There's no guarantee that Erin is done having kids, though. Her partial ovary seems to work just fine, unfortunately. 

[ranchgirl]

2 minutes ago, Salacious Kitty said:

There's no guarantee that Erin is done having kids, though. Her partial ovary seems to work just fine, unfortunately. 

Definitely true.  But they don't need extra room for that kind of thing.  They will stuff any additional kids somewhere.  A hall closet will work fine.  

[Salacious Kitty]

Towels? Who needs 'em! 

[Heathen]

1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

Having a small one floor home would be much easier for both Janie and Bill. They still would be in a familiar environment. Many retired couples prefer to down size at a certain age.

I think Erin's aunt and uncle would welcome the help. Especially basically having eyes on J&B at all times. E&C wouldn't have to have ownership of the home, they could pay the basic bills, but with no rent in return for caring for J&B.

The outside would be a familiar environment, to an extent. Their actual home would not. Their bedroom, the bathroom, the living room, the kitchen would all be confusing and upsetting for Bill. This isn't about a simple downsize. My grandmother had dementia, and she'd get upset when anything was changed in her house. 

It isn't Bill and Jane's job, or anyone else's, to give up their home for a couple of fertility-cult morons who won't support the kids they already have and will continue to have. It also isn't their job to give Chad and Erin a job, for money or free rent or anything else. 

Chad and Erin need to grow TF up. 

[65mickey]

Exactly Heathen.  Many older people do not want or appreciate others telling them what is best for them. The elder Bates probably want to live out the rest of their lives in the home that they are in now. They may need help but that help doesn't have to be booting them out of their home. The talk about Erin and Chad moving into Papa Bill and Mama Jane's farm house centers around an idea to save them from homelessness not what is best for Bill and Jane. And who would pay to build the small house in the back? I bet it will not be Chad and Erin. 

It's way past time for Erin and Chad to grow up and act like adults with 6 kids to house and feed. 

[Salacious Kitty]

Maybe if Chad allowed Erin to make more content on YouTube, money wouldn't be so tight. But OTOH, they're so dull. Cooking videos can only get you so far, as evidenced by Zach's foray into that space. 

[RebeccatheWriter]

There is always confusion on this but Bill and Jane have between 60-70 acres of farmland with their house and barn structures on it. Gil's sister has eight acres that she was gifted (bought for $5) from Bill and Jane. She's the one who has an above ground pool and her house whee she lived with her husband until he died. Gil's brother Greg has about eight acres too that he bought for $5. Greg has a house built on his land too. Gil said on United Bates of America that he had a few acres there but when you search the property records, nothing comes up. 

If, and I assume they have done this, Bill and Jane have already set their estates up for after they pass with trusts and wills, etc., Erin or any of the grandchildren moving there would be problematic for the future - potentially. Gil's parents probably are leaving all of the land to be split among Gil, Greg, and Jennifer. Gil and Greg's children would not inherit anything until Gil and Greg pass away. I'm not sure what Jennifer will do since her spouse is deceased and they had no children. When my grandparents died everything was left to my dad, aunts, and uncles. My father's will states that I will get the land he received but everything else goes to my mother if she is still living. Erin jumping line could cause a lot of issues with her siblings, cousins, aunt, and uncle. For example some of the 60-70 acres includes a creek and is probably not buildable land. Imagine being the one stuck with that land because one of your sisters jumped line as she was bad with finances. Not to mention if they built something on the land that is still owned by Bill and Jane, they are increasing the tax burden on an elderly couple. 

I don't put it past them to do it. I just think it is crappy that for all Chad's "talents," he cannot manage to do more than handy man work and selling prayer cards. 

[GeeGolly]

I was using my perspective on the situation. My parents lived in a split level - bedrooms and bathroom up a half staircase and den, second bath, garage entrance, backyard exit down half a staircase, with kitchen dining and living in the middle. (and three steps down to an office and laundry room from the den)

My dad, was my mom (with Alzheimer's) primary caregiver. They had to move because it was too difficult for my dad to care for her there. The sold their house and bought a one floor (besides basement) condo. It was the only way we could keep her home, which we were able to do, for another 5 years until she died.

Everyone's experience is different and we have no idea what will work for whom. I was thinking because Papa B is having trouble with his mobility a ground floor, low threshold home would be a good fit.

[lookeyloo]

I'm sure we all  have some very good ideas of what we think would work for them all, but, then again we are not privy to all the ins and outs of their lives/finances/etc.  Even if they decide something we don't like, that will be their decision to live with.

[BitterApple]

I think Erin and Chad could provide a lot of help to Bill and Jane, but I'm not sure how six kids would affect the balance of that household. The last time Carlin and Evan invaded, Bill looked uncomfortable and stressed. 

It might all be moot anyways. Somebody from their church will probably bail them out, just like they did last time. My biggest fear is that Erin will pop out three more kids and poor Carson will be the Lawon of the family, paying the bills when he's only a teenager. I could easily see that happening. 

[cereality]

From Carlin's videos it has always appeared that Bill and Jane's bedroom/bathroom IS on the ground level of that house. I've always noticed it bc Carlin/Evan and Law will go there to "help" Jane and will always make such a racket as they "make breakfast" - i.e. bang the cabinet doors etc. - and then Jane comes out of her bedroom. Like you're grown adults there to supposedly care for your elderly grandparents whose bedroom is 4 ft away, maybe SHUT UP. IDK if it was designed that way or if at some point as they aged they decided to close off some space and make a master bed/bath downstairs. So while Bill has general mobility problems, at least one of the problems isn't having to go up and down the stairs all day. 

By no means do I think Bill and Jane should EVER consider the idea of some mobile home or prefab home while Chad/Erin live in THEIR home that they worked their whole lives to build. The "best" that can be done here IF Jane were to agree at some point when she needs more help - Chad/Erin live in their home, taking care of her and Bill, while Chad earns money outside the home doing . . . something . . . to come up with the money for a prefab home on the property and then that prefab home goes on Gil's acreage. While that would probably cause issues with the other sisters/BILs who don't work and want $$ - i.e. Evan - at least those are issues for Gil to resolve with HIS brood - without unfairly taking anything from their aunt, uncle, or cousins.

On 8/30/2024 at 4:45 PM, BitterApple said:

Bobby and Tori bought another house a while back, they're no longer in the starter home next to Z&W's old place. So yeah, even uber-Fundie Tori is doing better and Kelton is clearly paying Bobby well. 

Not sure I realized Bobby/Tori had moved out of the starter home though now that you say it it does sound vaguely familiar. I mean the reason uber fundie Tori is doing better is because she married a man who is willing to go to work every day. And she married a man who was raised upper middle class himself, so he understands that things like housing and mortgages are a necessity, not a "distraction." At one point I used to follow Bobby's sister on IG and she always used to give major props to their dad for being so religious blah blah but also being so great at finance and having taught her so much that she's now applying to secure her future. So yeah pretty sure he taught his only son those things too and Bobby unlike Chad probably knows what the S&P is and throws some extra money in there as finances allow.

And FWIW I think Kelton is trying to build a large stable business that'll go on for years and years in Knox, so I think he does pay people well. Per an IG he did with Josie this year, his business is now big enough that he isn't even managing the entire biz himself anymore - he has hired 2-3 people to oversee sales, accounts etc. Obviously he still has Bobby too - but if he felt he needed 2-3 additional people besides him and Bobby, yeah he's paying Bobby well. And last yr he went on a podcast with that barber friend of theirs talking small biz and he was quite direct in saying it is his goal to make as many of his employees millionaires as possible. He didn't specify how - could be through retirement matches to encourage saving for the future; could be through profit sharing so that if the biz does well this year, everyone does better than just their avg salary. I mean obviously trade businesses do this kind of thing to hold onto their good plumbers, but I can't imagine that he's doing all this and excluding Bobby. So yeah Bobby while not as well off as how he grew up, is doing perfectly well for himself. While Chad is making scripture cards to sell on Etsy or wherever . . . . 

[cereality]

35 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

My biggest fear is that Erin will pop out three more kids and poor Carson will be the Lawon of the family, paying the bills when he's only a teenager. I could easily see that happening. 

Unfortunately I think this is 100% what is going to happen. How old is Carson - 9-10? I don't think Chad is suddenly going to do anything to get his act together and get himself a steady income. So it's going to be another 5 years of moving around, dad doing handyman jobs here and there, praying for the Lord to get us our next place to live blah blah. And bam Carson is 15-16 and suddenly they can be a "double income" household - whatever Chad brings in + Carson now having to work.

It's no secret all these chicks start their kids in homeschool early and/or run longer school years so that the kids are all done school by age 16. Carlin I think was still "teaching" when Jackson was a teen and at one point she was "bragging" about how he was finishing up school at 16 and was basically just rushing to do whatever remaining school in the evenings so he could be free to work construction and make $ all day. Though lucky for him - unlike Lawson - he was one of the younger sons so he was making $ for himself to get out of dodge, not to fund G&K's household expenses. Carson won't have that luxury as the oldest son.

That child looks miserable/worried all the time and my sense is mommy and daddy have each made him their bestie in ways that are not age appropriate. There was no reason an 8 yr old needed to know about his mother's fertility and be praying non stop for more siblings and a boy. If she can talk to her 9 yr old son about her fertility, you better believe she's in his ear 24-7 about how expensive everything is, how hard it is to buy a house, how daddy works soooo hard blah blah. Not to mention I'm sure they're both making Carson/Brooklyn (and whichever other kids understand) pray for a housing solution by Dec. Being in a child's ear about things that will just worry them but they can't do anything about is the surest way to give them anxiety for life.

[RebeccatheWriter]

Alyssa gave a tour of Bill and Jane's earlier this year. She showed there were two bedrooms on the main floor and another bedroom that was called Bill's office. There were two bathrooms and she referred to Jane as using one and Bill as using another. After their kids were grown they converted the attic to guest rooms. It's a bit cluttered with furniture but could be adjusted to make way for a walker (a wheelchair would be harder). Someone needs to put in a ramp for them. Zach said he was going to do it but I've not seen it done yet. For financial and sentimental reasons I get why they want to stay. Depending on the type of dementia Bill has and his symptoms, a move could make things worse. It could also make things safer. So it is always a balancing act. I've had relatives who were sweet and kind as always - even in the later stages. I've been around other relatives who became paranoid and combative. 

He doesn't need six kids underfoot and those kids don't need to be seeing the day in and day out trials of dementia and failing health. Carson and Brooklyn always look so miserable. I can't imagine them having to deal with seeing the melt downs and moments Bill has when it is a bad day. I say this as someone who was Brooklyn's age when my grandfather had a brain tumor. It was traumatizing to see and witness some of those things. My parents encouraged me to be a child, unlike Erin who expects her children to be mini-adults, especially an emotional support child like Carson/Charles. 

If Jane wants additional help, Michaela and Brandon might be the better choice for them.