Small Talk: Judge's Chambers

[WhineandCheez]

Thanks for your insight, teebax, I feel exactly as you. It's kinda like a "look over here and feel righteous," as people are reaming us out "over there."

 

Enough of this, anyone watch the cases yesterday? I wanted to not yet slap, but firmly poke the Plaintiff who was suing for being shot in the leg with a pellet gun. JJ asked her like 5 times for the amount of her UNPAID MEDICAL BILLS and she kept including the money for her lost wages.  She would not comply and finally when JJ got her to, she just estimated the amount. Who "estimates" the amount of their medical bills?  Borrow Judy's giant 1991 calculator and add it them up, chica. Also  bugging was the chick who just let the former owners of her car repossess it for unpaid tickets that were sent to the former owners, because she never registered the car (due to never receiving the title, who would allow that shit?). She kept saying over and over "They wouldn't let me look at the tickets!  They wouldn't let me look at the tickets!,"  like a Tibetan monk chanting a mantra.

[teebax]

Whineandcheez, I think the episode discussion is in the main thread. This is where we come for off-topic stuff. I'm not even sure how the welfare discussion started, but I wanted to weigh in with my two cents.

When Nike, Shell, Fiat, GM, Ford, Intel, Alcoa, and Boeing get over $30 billion, and the total we give to corporations tops $100 billion, that makes my blood boil. That's way more than we spend on social welfare, by the way. But nobody gets outraged about it. These are companies turning a profit, with CEOs collecting handsom bonuses. How is that any different from a JJ litigant who lied about who lives with her so she can continue to collect benefits? Or a guy who is collecting disability while working construction under the table?

I'll tell you how. Social welfare scammers go to jail if they get caught. Yes, many of them don't get caught, but some of hem do. And the penalties are harsh. Corporate welfare is perfectly legal. So, no, two wrongs don't make a right, but only one of those wrongs is actually illegal. I do think they should crack down on scammers, who take money they're not entitled to. But before we focus on that, I'd really like to see a backlash against corporate subsidies.

It's easy to look with disdain at a poor person and call them a loser. But it's much more nuanced than that. If a person's choice is between barely scraping by on minimum wage and sitting at home and getting more, is that even a choice? Look at what minimum wage is where you live. Now look at the cost of living. If it rose with inflation, minimum wage should be over $15 an hour. If it were, maybe some of these people gaming the system wouldn't feel it necessary to do so because they could legitamately support their families.

I was unemployed for six weeks from late Novemebr until mid January. Do you know how much I collected from the generous folks of Arizona? $240 a week. And that's for someone who used to clear over $70k a year. It was barely enough for my mortgage. I didn't qualify for any cash assistance because I had the temerity to have money in savings. I found another job and ended up okay, but imagine that scenario for someone who was making $25k a year when they lost their job and had no savings or credit because they were living check to check.

Yet we wonder why people go unbanked. And we wonder why they don't just tug up their bootstraps and get a job. We wonder why they don't just borrow money from their parents, as a recent candidate for president suggested. I'm just saying that it's not that black and white. It's easy to point at a neighbor down the street and look down at them because they're accessible to us. I wish we instead pointed at the tycoon on the hill.

[AngelaHunter]

We wonder why they don't just borrow money from their parents, as a recent candidate for president suggested.

 

What? A presidential candidate said that? What if your parents, like my widowed mother, didn't have any money to give me when I had holes in my shoes?

 

I guess I shouldn't be surprised at such a statement, not now in the age when the prophecy of "Idiocracy" is being fulfilled so richly.

[Ouisch]

I used to work at a steel service center in a fairly sketchy area of Detroit (let's face it, most such industrial plants are never located in leafy suburbs - no one wants the noise and smell and 18-wheeler truck traffic in their back yard) back in the mid-1990s. Back then food stamps were actual coupons, not the EBT swipe card that is issued today. There was a party store ("convenience" store or "liquor" store to you non-Michiganders) one block away where I'd stop by once or twice a week to buy a pop or a pack of smokes (this was before I quit, obviously). Without fail I'd be accosted by a group of young men and women offering to sell me food stamps for 50 cents on the dollar, or less as I refused.

 

In the same vein, while I worked at that company I was in charge of writing the manual for our application for QS-9000 certification, which required me to go out into the plant and interview and shadow many of the workers (not many females in the company ventured into that territory). One guy (who turned out to be the Union Steward) asked me more than once if I needed "anything" - he could hook me up with food stamps, WIC coupons, Focus:Hope milk, you name it. (I don't know why he thought I'd be interested.) Anyway, not long after that I was in the market for a new car (having previously owned only used vehicles), and had recently driven a Lincoln Town Car for a weekend (won it from a rental agency via a business card in a fish bowl). I fell in love with that luxury ride. On a whim I went to a dealer and found out that, with an A-Plan (an employee discount) I could lease a Continental for two years for a little over $200/month. When I told the salesman that I didn't work for Ford or have any relatives who did, he slyly intimated that "sometimes you can find employees who have A-Plans that they don't intend to use...."  :::wink  wink:::  I went back to Mr. Get-Me-Anything in the plant and asked him if he knew anyone with an A-Plan for sale. He reeled back as if I'd slapped him with a dead trout and admonished me, "A-Plans are a benefit for Ford employees, they are not for sale! That would be...just...just... wrong!!" This from Mr. "I'll sell you discount milk intended for single struggling mothers" I guess the Union has more of a moral hold on some folks just plain humanity.

[teebax]

What? A presidential candidate said that? What if your parents, like my widowed mother, didn't have any money to give me when I had holes in my shoes?

 

I guess I shouldn't be surprised at such a statement, not now in the age when the prophecy of "Idiocracy" is being fulfilled so richly.

Romney said it during the last presidential election. I won't post the links here, but you can Google it; it really happened. I think there's a YouTube video as well.

[AngelaHunter]

Romney said it during the last presidential election.

 

Found it.

 

Mitt Romney told students that, his friend, Jimmy John, started a business by borrowing $20,000 from his parents at a low interest rate. Romney suggested anyone in the audience could do the same:

 

I have no words.

[Brattinella]

God, how out of touch is THAT?

[AngelaHunter]

He needs a Judge Milian "What planet are you living on??" type beat down.

[Rick Kitchen]

What's amazing to me is the shows that use actors instead of real litigants--and I like to think I can usually tell this, too--how do they find so many halfway decent improv actors to fill out their shows? I mean, I realize you can't swing a cat in LA without hitting an aspiring performer, but improv is a very specific skill, and I agree, even without having LAgator's insight, that the way it appears is that the "litigants" are given not so much scripts to memorize as general facts of their "case" and then they're set loose to have at it. If that's true, they actually do a fairly impressive job IMO. It's clearly not entirely real, but doesn't seem completely fake either. That said, I don't enjoy anything but TPC and JJ precisely because those are real people, hard as it is to believe sometimes :)

 

As far as I know, being a "real judge" is common to all of the TV judges, although the level at which they served could be traffic court. I wonder how they feel about interacting with actors instead of "real people"?

 

Practically everybody in LA who claims to be an actor takes improv classes.  They're a dime a dozen.

 

Judge Faith is not a judge.  She was a Manhattan DA and a private litigator, but never a judge.  She was also first-runner-up to Miss America.

[Milz]

Here's something a former The People's Court litigant wrote. https://www.yahoo.com/news/wish-id-never-gone-peoples-194123988.html

 

I don't think Byrd hands JJ blank sheets of paper.......

[bref]

Truthfully, the description of her experience sounds more like Judge Judy than Judge Milian!

[AngelaHunter]

I'm assuming the losers are never going to have any positive comments, as we've seen from No-Neck's hallterviews. Everything from "It is what it is", to "Not fair!" to "the judge is biased (in favour of Hispanics and women). The winners never have anything but praise for their experiences here.

[teebax]

Hi, everyone. I've been hanging out in the attic because I'm teaching classes at night and missing most of the episodes. Thank goodness for Rodeo Days so I'll have some time coming up during which I can catch up. Yes, our schools close for Rodeo. I am officially living in the wild, wild west.

 

By the way, my limited time working in education has confirmed for me that the litigants we see on JJ are, indeed, reproducing. I was cursed out tonight by a parent whose child hasn't been to school in over a week. It seems her daughter swore up and down that she has been going to school. She must be sneaking in through a window because none of us have seen her. I told her, "Lady, if I can't pick your kid out of a lineup your kid isn't coming to school. Why would I lie to you?"

 

My point is that these little snowflakes are getting away with murder, and then growing up to be JJ litigants who think it's the world and the rest of us are just spectators.

 

When I was a kid, my parents sided with the school, even when the school was wrong! I was guilty until proven innocent. When did that change?

[Tosia]

As a teacher, I can testify truth to your comments. Seriously, I need to be ultra-careful what I say and do. Helps to have another adult witness in the room. Almost not worth it, but I 'm nearing retirement. The future is going to be tough for everyone with more of these morons procreating.

[Guest]

My point is that these little snowflakes are getting away with murder, and then growing up to be JJ litigants who think it's the world and the rest of us are just spectators.

A few years ago, I read a book called the Narcissism Epidemic: Living in the Age of Entitlement. I highly recommend it. We're all doomed to live in a world controlled by insufferable, entitled brats. Thanks a lot, terrible parents!

Edited February 24, 2016 by Guest

[Brattinella]

A few years ago, I read a book called the Narcissism Epidemic: Living in the Age of Entitlement. I highly recommend it. We're all doomed to live in a world controlled by insufferable, entitled brats. Thanks a lot, terrible parents!

 

Thanks for that!  I found that and a few other interesting-looking books there, I'll keep an eye out.

[AngelaHunter]

When I was a kid, my parents sided with the school, even when the school was wrong! I was guilty until proven innocent. When did that change?

 

I don't know but it seems most prevalent with people who are now 40 - 50 year old parents. This seems to be the generation most prone to saying, "Neither we nor our children will take responsibility for anything we do because it's never our fault." The kids learn to feel this way and don't care what they do because they know their parents will always defend them.

 

And yeah, when I was in high school there was no point going home and whining to our parents that the teacher had thrown an eraser at us. The reaction wouldn't have been to storm down to the school, contact the media about the abuse of their little darlings or to hire a lawyer and sue for the damage done to our fragile psyches. The reaction would have been, "Well, you must have been doing something wrong." Thus, we learned not to do the wrong thing or we'd suffer the consequences.

[rcc]

That's how it is these days. No accountability and no respect for teachers or anyone else for that matter.

 

My nephew was a student teacher in math in high school after he graduated with honors. He lasted a month. The kids were disrespectful and wouldn't listen and he became disillusioned. Now he is working for an insurance company making more money in their accounting dept. Kudos to all the teachers who have persevered. I really think being a teachers is a calling. But now I think it is getting harder and harder to answer that call.

[SRTouch]

And yeah, when I was in high school there was no point going home and whining to our parents that the teacher had thrown an eraser at us. The reaction wouldn't have been to storm down to the school, contact the media about the abuse of their little darlings or to hire a lawyer and sue for the damage done to our fragile psyches. The reaction would have been, "Well, you must have been doing something wrong." Thus, we learned not to do the wrong thing or we'd suffer the consequences.

I grew up in the 60s, when corporal punishment was still around. It wasn't universal, not high school, but in elementary and jr high. They handed out forms at the beginning of the year that we took home for parental consent. Then we'd bring back a sealed envelope - which all the kids were told gave permission. I always wondered how many of us were being faked out when permission had been denied. My 5th grade teacher taught 4 out of 5 of me and my siblings, and kept a paddle visibly displayed on her desk. Course the threat was enough, I don't remember her ever actually using it. The 5 kids in my family all knew that a spanking at school would be followed by one at home.

[ItsHelloPattiagain]

 

My 5th grade teacher taught 4 out of 5 of me and my siblings, and kept a paddle visibly displayed on her desk. Course the threat was enough, I don't remember her ever actually using it.

I also grew up in the 60s. I had a 6th grade teacher with a paddle on his desk and damn if he didn't use it. I only got a swat or two over the year, but we had to come up, "assume the position" by putting our hands on the desk with our butts facing the class and get our licks in front of the class. My teacher was Mr. Hathaway, a man in his late 50s or early 60s and people clamored for their kids to get into his class (he also used to do academic competitions every Friday followed by penny auctions where we kids could purchase stuff from each other with pennies we had earned during the competitions (and of course penny candy from the teacher). I'm 57 but I still remember his classes and his face. He taught my older brother and the class was the same when I got there. (apparently no parents had bitched about their special snowflakes getting humiliated in front of the class). 

 

And no - this was NOT in the South. This was in Las Vegas, Nevada. 

Edited February 24, 2016 by ItsHelloPattiagain

[AuntiePam]

No corporal punishment in my school in the 50's/early 60's (Iowa) but it wasn't necessary, because it happened at home.  The teachers didn't need to touch us because we knew our parents would, if we needed it.  But I don't think most of us needed it -- our parents had all the power.  Most of us didn't have our own cars and our jobs were part-time, babysitting and such, so not much spending money. 

 

It was considered disgraceful not to graduate high school.  Dropouts were mostly males, who would often go right to the military if they were 18, or females, who got pregnant, but that was also rare. 

 

The "it takes a village" concept was in force.  Adults watched out for all the kids, and if you acted up, your parents would know.  Or if you needed help, you could knock on almost any door and get help.

[SRTouch]

My teacher was Mr. Hathaway, a man in his late 50s or early 60s and people clamored for their kids to get into his class (he also used to do academic competitions every Friday followed by penny auctions where we kids could purchase stuff from each other with pennies we had earned during the competitions (and of course penny candy from the teacher). I'm 57 but I still remember his classes and his face.

Yep, the teacher I was remembering was Miss Smith. I remember she read to us every day after lunch, and even remember she read us "The Yearling" and "The Virginian". No doubt I could pick her out of a photo today. Another difference I see today - kids didn't call adults by their first name. Just a little sign of respect which seems to be rare nowadays.

[AuntiePam]

Also, kids weren't "special snowflakes" and parents weren't "helicopter parents".  When did that start? 

[SandyToes]

I've been out of public schools for about 4 years now. Miss the kids terribly, but not the drama and the risk! I see so many instances of kids baiting teachers, cell phones at the ready, and the news media jumps all over it.  Other side of the issue? Never! A case in our district where a teacher's career was ruined because an upset mom posted a comment of facebook, a friend of hers called the news media, and BOOM!  The mom even called the teacher to apologize, but by then the damage was done. A wonderful special ed teacher gone, and a true loss to her future students. I got tired of wondering if today was the day ** I ** would end up on the news.  Good luck, teebax!

 

We had a special ed student once who was capable, but very lazy. Mom was very adamant that NO ONE know her son received modified assignments, special assistance, extra time, etc. Privacy!! Yet, saw nothing odd about requesting he have a personal instructional aide by his side at all times, all day, every day.  Yeah, that would surely go unnoticed....  Snowflake squared.

 

I'm not sure what caused the change, or when it occurred, but I think it also speaks to the current mentality of "what can you/ the government/ anyone else do for me?" among some folks, and a genuine lack of shame. It used to be a BAD thing to be unwed and pregnant, to file bankruptcy, to be unable to support oneself, to make a bad grade in school, to have a police record, etc.  There were consequences to poor choices. Sure, some of that needed to be changed, as we become a more tolerant, accepting society. But  I wonder if it hasn't also led to an attitude of "rules are fine if they don't apply to me,"  and consequences are deemed to be unfair and unnecessary.  I think we see a wide range of lifestyles and demographics on this show, but the common thread is "not my problem/fault."  What happened to personal responsibility?  We had a Section 8 renter (great family) who had their assistance cut way back when daughter and some number of grandchildren  moved out. They were aghast that we wouldn't let them live in a $1400/ month house for $500.  Not their fault the money was cut! We were mean, unreasonable, horrible people because we wouldn't reduce the rent. Forget that our mortgage on the house was considerably higher than $500 a month - not their problem! They ultimately moved out, and it was so sad because there were a great family, nice, funny, helpful, kind, but refused to even speak to us when they left. .

/End rant/  Thus endeth my sermon/sociology lesson for the day.  YMMV, of course!  Thanks for letting me vent a little.

[Milz]

And yeah, when I was in high school there was no point going home and whining to our parents that the teacher had thrown an eraser at us. The reaction wouldn't have been to storm down to the school, contact the media about the abuse of their little darlings or to hire a lawyer and sue for the damage done to our fragile psyches. The reaction would have been, "Well, you must have been doing something wrong." Thus, we learned not to do the wrong thing or we'd suffer the consequences.

 

I had a teacher who used to throw erasers at students who were turned around in their seats talking.

 

Speaking about special snowflakes, anyone read about the Yelp employee who got fired? Here's her letter to corporate: https://medium.com/@taliajane/an-open-letter-to-my-ceo-fb73df021e7a#.cghdqsep6

Edited February 25, 2016 by Milz

[Quof]

Milz, were you in my Grade 7 French class????   Because Mr. Bouchard was a wicked shot with that eraser.

 

There's a new trend in Canada to calling them Curling Parents, because they sweep every obstacle out of their child's path.

[AngelaHunter]

I had a teach who used to throw erasers at students who were turned around in their seats talking.

 

We wouldn't dream of talking in Mr.Bevington's class. He'd wing the eraser, or sometimes just chalk, at anyone who had the ill manners to turn and look at the clock while he was speaking.

[funky-rat]

 

Speaking about special snowflakes, anyone read about the Yelp employee who got fired? Here's her letter to corporate: https://medium.com/@taliajane/an-open-letter-to-my-ceo-fb73df021e7a#.cghdqsep6

Normally, I would have stopped reading after the first few paragraphs.  Way to turn your rant about your job into a pity party.  And she had the nerve to post links so people could send her money?  Welcome to adulthood, sweetie.

[Milz]

Milz, were you in my Grade 7 French class????   Because Mr. Bouchard was a wicked shot with that eraser.

 

There's a new trend in Canada to calling them Curling Parents, because they sweep every obstacle out of their child's path.

 

Mine was my 7th grade English teacher. If the eraser wasn't chalky enough, he would write stuff on the board, erase it, then throw it. We had a substitute teacher who threw a talker out the classroom window (ground floor), then locked the window, and wouldn't let the kid in until the end of the period. That happened during 2nd period, so the rest of the day the other classes behaved. News of that spread like wildfire. I heard it while walking to my 3rd period algebra class. It was the big topic during lunch.

 

 

Normally, I would have stopped reading after the first few paragraphs.  Way to turn your rant about your job into a pity party.  And she had the nerve to post links so people could send her money?  Welcome to adulthood, sweetie.

 

 After reading it, I was shocked she was an English major. But I could totally see her on JJ trying to explain why her landlord was unreasonable evicting her or some other mess. 

Edited February 25, 2016 by Milz

[Brattinella]

Mine was my 7th grade English teacher. If the eraser wasn't chalky enough, he would write stuff on the board, erase it, then throw it. We had a substitute teacher who threw a talker out the classroom window (ground floor), then locked the window, and wouldn't let the kid in until the end of the period. That happened during 2nd period, so the rest of the day the other classes behaved. News of that spread like wildfire. I heard it while walking to my 3rd period algebra class. It was the big topic during lunch.

 

 

 

 After reading it, I was shocked she was an English major. But I could totally see her on JJ trying to explain why her landlord was unreasonable evicting her or some other mess. 

 

I've been following this story and the back and forth, so I looked up the median price of apartments in San Francisco.  $3500.  One bedroom apt.

The only way she could survive on this job without a roommate is to live right next to a BART station.  Maybe not even then.  Very unrealistic expectations.

[teebax]

I grew up in the 60s, when corporal punishment was still around. It wasn't universal, not high school, but in elementary and jr high. They handed out forms at the beginning of the year that we took home for parental consent. Then we'd bring back a sealed envelope - which all the kids were told gave permission. I always wondered how many of us were being faked out when permission had been denied. My 5th grade teacher taught 4 out of 5 of me and my siblings, and kept a paddle visibly displayed on her desk. Course the threat was enough, I don't remember her ever actually using it. The 5 kids in my family all knew that a spanking at school would be followed by one at home.

I think I was part of the last group that had corporal punishment. It was very much a thing in my elementary and junior high schools. I started high school in 1987. I'm not sure if they had paddles in high school because mine was HUGE, and I tended to avoid the principal's office. (If you remember the TV show Room 222, the high school in the opening credits is my high school.)

 

I don't know if corporal punishment is the answer. I think you can raise kids to be respectful without hitting them. But these parents are completely out of control. I had a student who is graduating soon tell me he's just going to live with his mom after graduation. I asked him if he was going to get a job, and he said, "No, I don't have to. My mom's obsessed with me. She'll take care of me forever." No plan b for that student. I don't know what he's going to do when mom has a debilitating illness or remarries someone with common sense who puts him out.

 

I contrast that with my parents who said, "When you finish high school, you can go to college, join the military, or move out and get a job. Those are your three, and only, choices. We don't support grown-ass people."

[AuntiePam]

I had a teacher who used to throw erasers at students who were turned around in their seats talking.

 

Speaking about special snowflakes, anyone read about the Yelp employee who got fired? Here's her letter to corporate: https://medium.com/@taliajane/an-open-letter-to-my-ceo-fb73df021e7a#.cghdqsep6

 

Are we supposed to feel sorry for her?  Because I don't.

 

I get that she wanted to live close to her dad, but damn, she's living in one of the most expensive cities in the country.  Move.  Get roommates.  Get a second job. 

[augmentedfourth]

I taught a non-core subject (music), so when the recession hit and I got laid off, I couldn't find another one. I wasn't willing to relocate, so I went back to school for a total career change. The state of education just keeps getting worse and worse (my husband still teaches, so I hear alllllll about it), so I haven't really looked back. There are some experiences with some students I miss, but that's greatly outweighed by dealing with idiot administrators, parents, a crazy coworker who hated me and my other coworkers wouldn't let me walk to my car by myself for a while.

 

Okay, maybe the crazy coworker isn't unique to teaching in the public schools. Except she had tenure and the district botched their documentation of all the insane shit she did, and she lawyered up and didn't get fired. Woo hoo!

 

One of the parents, whose son might have actually been a sociopath, refused to come in for conferences, and then when I failed her son, the ranting message she left me was so long, she reached the limit of my voicemail and I didn't even get to hear all of it. (I know you must be thinking "how can you fail music?" Believe it or not, I actually had a grading policy where --and this will come as a TOTAL shock, I know-- to get a good grade in band class, you had to bring your instrument. What a hardass I was.)

 

I left at the very beginning of kids having cell phones in school (and their phones were always nicer than mine, of course). For all I know, there's footage of me floating around the internet where I'm arguing with a 15-year-old twice my size about whether I would write up a disciplinary referral for him if he stacked a bunch of desks on top of each other and tried to jump over them. Someone claimed he was filming on his phone, but whatever, I won and the jump wasn't attempted.

[AngelaHunter]

corporal punishment was still around. It wasn't universal, not high school, but in elementary and jr high. They handed out forms at the beginning of the year that we took home for parental consent.

 

No permission was requested of our parents, although I have no doubt my parents would have consented. It was just accepted that if we misbehaved, we'd get punished. Girls never got "the strap" but boys in high school did. It didn't happen often, since the threat of it was usually enough. Teachers could put their hands on us, as long as they didn't actually cause injury. Only one teacher, who was  a bit nutty, got the boot for grabbing a boy by his hair and slamming his forehead against the desk.

[AuntiePam]

No permission was requested of our parents, although I have no doubt my parents would have consented. It was just accepted that if we misbehaved, we'd get punished. Girls never got "the strap" but boys in high school did. It didn't happen often, since the threat of it was usually enough. Teachers could put their hands on us, as long as they didn't actually cause injury. Only one teacher, who was  a bit nutty, got the boot for grabbing a boy by his hair and slamming his forehead against the desk.

 

We had one of those.  I'll never forget it.  8th grade, Mr. Boughton tells student Paul "I'm going to have a talk with your mother."  Paul responds "My mother would love to meet you."  Mr. B rushes to Paul, grabs him by the shoulders and lifts him, desk and all, and drops him on the floor. 

 

The shocking part was a student lipping off to a teacher -- it just wasn't done. 

 

I don't remember what, if anything, happened with Mr. B.

[SRTouch]

We had one of those.  I'll never forget it.  8th grade, Mr. Boughton tells student Paul "I'm going to have a talk with your mother."  Paul responds "My mother would love to meet you."  Mr. B rushes to Paul, grabs him by the shoulders and lifts him, desk and all, and drops him on the floor. 

 

The shocking part was a student lipping off to a teacher -- it just wasn't done. 

 

I don't remember what, if anything, happened with Mr. B.

Let's see, 8th grade means about 13yo - about time for a kid to act like an idiot. Teacher didn't really do anything to hurt the boy, but I bet he made quite an impression - not only on that kid but the whole school - heck word of mouth probably had a lasting effect for a couple years.

[teebax]

Let's see, 8th grade means about 13yo - about time for a kid to act like an idiot. Teacher didn't really do anything to hurt the boy, but I bet he made quite an impression - not only on that kid but the whole school - heck word of mouth probably had a lasting effect for a couple years.

It was hard as hell to be a gay kid in the 80s, when it was still socially acceptable for kids, and teachers, to pick on those of us who were a bit different. Needless to say, I dealt with my share of bullying in high school.

 

That is until my sophomore year when a girl decided to knock my lunch tray out of my hands as I was walking through the cafeteria. She'd been picking on me mercilessly. (I later found out at one our reunions that she had a massive crush on me; she got ridiculously drunk, apologized, admitted her crush, and then made a clumsy pass at me which I promptly rejected.) 

 

Anyway, I pushed her, and she landed in our trophy case (they lined one end of our cafeteria with trophy cases for some brilliant reason.) Now, it wasn't my intention to put this chick through the trophy case, but I puffed up as if it were. I was no dummy! Thereafter I was known as the girl who put someone through a trophy case (Stieg Larsson didn't live long enough to write about me.) Nobody messed with me after that.

 

It's amazing how one crazy act on my behalf turned me into a total badass. I still continue to take no shit from anyone.

[Milz]

I recall there were lots of fist fights in 7th and 8th grade. By high school, only the 9th graders got into fist fights. Fighting was a babyish thing to do after age 15. Now, however, it seems like fist fighting, car keying, etc. are mature behaviors ('mature' as in age, not wisdom).

 

T'bax, I had long hair until I was a junior in high school. It used to go down to my waist and I would keep it pulled back in a low pony tail. In 7th grade there was an 8th grader who used to grab my pony tail and flick it up, every. time. she passed by me in the hallway. And she used to say something she apparently thought was hilarious because she laughed so hard while saying I couldn't understand her. Anyhow, during my freshman year in high school, I didn't see her at all and pretty much forgot about her. During second part of my sophomore year, I was at my locker and someone grabbed my pony tail, flicked it in the air, and said something while laughing. She was back. That summer, the AC at home broke down and my dad didn't want to fix it until fall  when the repair would be cheaper (yeah, I know). So I chopped my hair to shoulder length, thinking I would be cooler (temperature wise.) Junior year starts. Hair flicker sees me sans pony tail. Her face falls and she says "You cut your hair! It was so pretty!" `Never saw her again. In retrospect, she was grabbing my hair and being annoying because she was envious. I think in her own twisted, personal space invading mind, she thought that she was paying me complements every time she did that. I wonder if anyone ever slapped the sh!t out of her later in life for being annoying. I was really meek in high school. But in college......my roommate freshman year was a total a$$. Returning from a 3 day weekend at home, I found my pillows, blanket, comforter,  bed sheets, bath robe, and spare pajamas gone (thankfully the emergency cash I hid in my boombox wasn't touched!). So, she comes to our room about 30 minutes after I got there. She tells me "I thought you weren't coming until 9!". I ask her, where my stuff is. She tells me that the little sister of a girl down the hall made a surprise visit for that saturday only. But since the sister's roommate left for the weekend, the little sister decided to stay the rest of the weekend. And since the sister's roommate packed all of her dirty laundry with her, there were no bed sheets, pillows, etc. So my a$$hole roommate offered my things. But oh, she told me, she was going to wash everything before I got back, that she didn't think I minded, and anyway, I wasn't around so it wasn't like I was using my pillows, bed sheets, bathrobe, spare pajamas, blanket, and comforter. Then she said she would get my stuff back and wash it right then and there. I told she had no right to give my stuff out and I wanted completely new pillows, bed sheets, blankets, bath robe, etc. And she better get going to buy them because it was already 7 PM and I wanted to get to sleep by 10. So she leaves and tells the girl down the hall and tells the RA. RA talks to me. I tell the RA that the a$$hole loaned my stuff without my permission and needs to buy me a new set of pillows, bed sheets, blankets,pajamas, and bath robe. So around 9 PM, the RA comes to my room, with my washed things. She washed them herself. I told her thanks but no thanks, I don't want second hand stuff and I'm waiting for the a$$hole to come back from the store with brand new things. I knew the a$$hole was hiding in the other girl's room the whole time. So she doesn't come back the rest of the night. I go to my classes the next day. When I come back to the dorm, my bed is made with the stuff the RA washed, my pajamas are neatly folded on my bed,  and my bathrobe is hanging in the closet. There's a note on my desk, saying how sorry she is.  So I take all the stuff off my bed and put it  and the bathrobe in a big, messy pile on her bed, with a note that says "I expect a new bathrobe, new pajamas, a new set of bed sheets, new pillows, new blanket and a new comforter when I get back from the library at 8 PM." So I get back at 8, she's on the hall phone crying to her mother. The RA is waiting for me. She tells me that the a$$hole is really upset and requested to move to another room. I reply "Good." and walked into the room. She moves out the next day. And leaves an envelope with $80 in it. When everyone is packing to go home for the summer, her mom and dad come to pick her up. Her mother sees me and says "It's too bad you didn't get along with my daughter. Your mother needs to talk to you about getting along with other people". I tell her "It's too bad your daughter thought it was okay to give out my property. It's too bad her mother never taught her how to act appropriately." 

Edited February 25, 2016 by Milz

[funky-rat]

Are we supposed to feel sorry for her?  Because I don't.

 

I get that she wanted to live close to her dad, but damn, she's living in one of the most expensive cities in the country.  Move.  Get roommates.  Get a second job. 

But, but, but.....that would be haaaaarrrrddd.  She shouldn't have to do things that are hard, and that she doesn't want to dooooooo.  Nobody warned her that she would have to actually do stuff she didn't want to dooooo.  She piled up massive amounts of debt in anticipation of making loads of money doing whatever her heart desired.  So everyone needs to pony up and give her some money, so she can, you know, take some time and find herself, and recover from this horribly traumatic incident.

[momtoall]

Self-absorbed parents, are producing self-absorbed irresponsible children.  My former SIL tells  the story of a mother coming to a "required parental conference" (a last ditch effort before her child was expelled), and her focus wasn't on her child's issues.  No, her first remark to the group that included the vice principal, social worker and teachers, was: "You all don't think I'm his Mom because I look so young, but I am".  Her next was, "How old do you think I am?".  My SIL ended this by saying "We're not here to discuss your age or appearance, we here to discuss you child, his behavior and his future at this school". The point to her story is some of these children have issues because their parents have issues, which carry over to the child's behavior in the classroom. 

[Milz]

Self-absorbed parents, are producing self-absorbed irresponsible children.  My former SIL tells  the story of a mother coming to a "required parental conference" (a last ditch effort before her child was expelled), and her focus wasn't on her child's issues.  No, her first remark to the group that included the vice principal, social worker and teachers, was: "You all don't think I'm his Mom because I look so young, but I am".  Her next was, "How old do you think I am?".  My SIL ended this by saying "We're not here to discuss your age or appearance, we here to discuss you child, his behavior and his future at this school". The point to her story is some of these children have issues because their parents have issues, which carry over to the child's behavior in the classroom. 

 

If that woman's first name was Carin, she's probably my a$$hole roommate freshman year of college.

[momtoall]

If that woman's first name was Carin, she's probably my a$$hole roommate freshman year of college.

 

LOL ... At the time, SIL was working in a school district in Bullhead, AZ.

[Milz]

Here's some more about the special snowflake former Yelp employee. http://thatsalotofrice.com/

[TresGatos]

My first grade teacher at Our Lady of Lourdes in 1969 was Mrs. Riney and she was awful. Scrawny, redheaded with cat's-eye glasses. An absolute harridan. She would berate children. I will never forget how she chased Joy Alexander around the classroom, blocking her escape as Joy tried to climb out a window. Then there was a boy named Victor and she would join in as other children would chant, to the tune of an old Libby's commercial, "If it says Victor Victor Victor on the label, label, label/You will vomit vomit vomit on the table, table, table." and I remember  how he would hang his head, and his face would get red and if he cried it would be even worse. I was singled out once, over a math problem I didn't understand, division perhaps, and I said another student had told me that's how it was done and she stood over me just screaming, "If someone told you to jump off a bridge would you jump? Are you that stupid?" and every day after school my mother would ask, "Well, did y'all get beat?" Totally normalizing this behavior which was apparently accepted at this school because a 5th grade (male) teacher actually got fired after breaking a yardstick over a kid's head & cutting the kid's eye. I don't think hospitals were mandated reporters at the time but the fact that the kid ended up in the emergency room and almost lost an eye I think made a difference. Mrs. Riney actually produced a Priest from her loins, Father Maury Riney, so she gets an automatic ticket to heaven but I think if I had a better, less psycho, teacher I would have scored higher than the bottom 2% in math when I took the GRE.

[AngelaHunter]

Quote

That is until my sophomore year when a girl decided to knock my lunch tray out of my hands as I was walking through the cafeteria.

 

When I was in the first couple years of high school, this was a courtship ritual. If a boy raced up and slammed your books out of your hands, your friends would squeal, "Oh, he likes you!"

 

ActuallyI prefer those silly but innocent times to today's courtship rituals, which seem to consist of,"Here's my dick pics, soft and hard. Pm me!"

Edited February 25, 2016 by AngelaHunter

[teebax]

When I was in the first couple years of high school, this was a courtship ritual. If a boy raced up and slammed your books out of your hands, your friends would squeal, "Oh, he likes you!"

 

ActuallyI prefer those silly but innocent times to today's courtship rituals, which seem to consist of,"Here's my dick pics, soft and hard. Pm me!"

Oh, it's not just the dudes. I have been doing some rebound dating, and I can't believe the kind of pictures females send to me, without my even asking. There's nothing like sending a mundane message such as, "What do you do for fun?" and getting back a picture of her tits. I guess it's supposed to accomplish something, but all it does is make me say, "Next!"

Before we blame it on youth, I should point out that I don't even talk to anyone under age 35. These are grown-ass women, mostly professionals, who you'd think would know better. They're all trying to end up on that ID channel, I swear.

[AngelaHunter]

There's nothing like sending a mundane message such as, "What do you do for fun?" and getting back a picture of her tits...

Before we blame it on youth, I should point out that I don't even talk to anyone under age 35.

 

I don't want to write an essay on what I think about modern dating practices. I'm far from being a prude, but I just have to say I'm shocked - shocked, I tell you -  that this is coming from women over 35. Shocked first by anyone that age not having the common sense to NOT put compromising pictures online. These things have a funny way of getting around.  Second, I've learned something new recently, in that women seem to be able to get turned on by looking at anonymous body parts. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it never used to be that way (which I believe is the reason for the failure of Playgirl Magazine). Looking at naked bodies of someone I'm not already attracted to does absolutely nothing for me. Give me a man in a well-cut suit! Now that's hot. ;)

 

In my experience, what mature women require from a partner is way more complicated than he have a big dick(or a woman big breasts). By the time we got to know someone by TALKING, flirting (remember those activities?) etc. and found out we liked other qualities about them, dick size was immaterial. We were attacted to the person first - the whole package -  and didn't make our decisions based on one or two parts. You have to wonder how anyone managed to hook up in the dark days without previews of someone's genitals or boobs to help us decide we want him or her. It just seems ugly and sad to me. My Rant is done.

[Milz]

Angela Hunter, I presume the genital pic posters aren't looking for a meaningful relationship that includes physical and emotional intimacy. If you're only looking for a roll in the hay, you don't need to go looking for qualities beyond what's below the waistline (which is why we have JJ litigants who were never in relationships with the fathers and mothers of their children.)  I can't remember if it was on JJ or Judge Joe Brown, where some misguided woman said since her baby's father was good father to his other children, she thought he would a good father to their child too. (D'oh!)

 

It seems that people are forgetting that flirting, talking, etc. are part of the vetting process to separate the wheat from the chaff.

Edited February 26, 2016 by Milz

[AngelaHunter]

I can't remember if it was on JJ or Judge Joe Brown, where some misguided woman said since her baby's father was good father to his other children, she thought he would a good father to their child too. (D'oh!)

 

That was JJ, IIRC. Yeah, even though he cheated on her and wouldn't work, he was good at playing with babies.

 

If you're only looking for a roll in the hay, you don't need to go looking for qualities beyond what's below the waistline

 

 

Call me terribly picky and hopelessly obsolete, but even for something that's not going anywhere I required at least a fleeting connection, a spark, a certain indefinable something you see in someone's eyes that make you want to say Yes, even before knowing the exact length and girth in inches and centimeters. If all people require is functioning equipment of a certain size, why even bother? Get a Rabbit.XD Save yourself from all that boring chatting and other extraneous stuff.

 

It seems that people are forgetting that flirting, talking, etc. are part of the vetting process to separate the wheat from the chaff.

 

That's certainly a unknown concept to most people on this show.

[AuntiePam]

A preview for one of today's episode has a guy telling JJ that he has ten children.  Ten.