S10.E10: For Better or for Worse

[1011101010001]

Gino surprises Jasmine with a trip to get back on her good side after the strip club fiasco; Sophie thinks Rob is being cheap while ring shopping; Sam and Citra reunite; Nikki breaks down after Justin's news; Anali struggles with her isolated life.
 

First Look: 12/8/23

Full Episode: 12/10/23

[MrsBillyBob]

Oh Gino, never reward bad behavior.

[Craigcodybazhate]

I don’t think there’s any problem with coming out as bi sexual. Where is the suspense? I don’t get it. Your chick likes girls to. So what that’s fun. She’s with you. She’s loyal to you. She just says that she also gives women an opportunity when she is available. 

[HorrrGoodnight]

I especially loved the part where they asked if Muslims celebrate Christmas, followed by the astute observation that it was probably a different holy day like Yom Kippur.

[1011101010001]

On 12/9/2023 at 10:59 AM, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

I especially loved the part where they asked if Muslims celebrate Christmas, followed by the astute observation that it was probably a different holy day like Yom Kippur.

They probably think Ramadan is a hotel chain.

[Gobi]

On 12/9/2023 at 1:54 PM, MrBuhBye said:

 

I’m not buying his drug bust story.  If he had a prescription for it he could have brought it to court and showed the judge.  

He couldn’t because it was in the pocket of a pair of pants that he lent his friend and he didn’t get the pants back.

[TwirlyGirly]

Sam and Citra:

Sam lives in Cameron, MO and the closest mosque is in St. Joseph, MO - 35 miles away.

Converting to Islam is easy; one must declare the shahādah, the Muslim profession of faith: "There is no god but Allah; Muhammad is the messenger of Allah." 

That's it. 

But I don't see Sam praying five times a day, abstaining from alcohol and pork, fasting during Ramadan, or making a pilgrimage to Mecca.

Citra is devout; I don't think she'll accept Sam converting to Islam but failing to practice the faith.

Edited December 11, 2023 by TwirlyGirly

[Jeanne222]

What’s wrong with Sam’s nose?  It’s white on the end. I thought it was paint.

He’s a strange bird. Lots of secrets!

[1011101010001]

Coco comes in from outside and walks right across the clean laundry.

Devin acts like a two-year-old.  She’s not mature enough to marry.

What exactly does Anali see in Clayton?  She isn’t attracted to him, she doesn’t like his apartment, his lifestyle, his pets, or his family.  Doesn’t seem like when he takes those headphones off he engages in stimulating conversation or witty repartee with her.  Don’t need to hear how long his red meat diet requires him to strain on the toilet either.  

[TwirlyGirly]

Gino and Jasmine:

Jealousy is usually rooted in insecurity. When someone is insecure, it's their problem and their responsibility to learn how to overcome it. Therapy can help.

When I saw how happy Jasmine was with Miami, I got Russ and Paola vibes. I suspect Jasmine will start putting pressure on Gino to move to Miami by cycling through her bag of Manipulative Magic Tricks: First she'll do a few little things for Gino, and when he notices, Jasmine will say she does these things because she loves him and would do anything for him. Then she'll sweetly ask if they can move to Miami. He'll say no, and she'll cry. The crying will quickly morph into yelling, then screeching, and reminding Gino of all the sacrifices she made to be with him. Finally, she'll remove her ring, throw it on the floor, and tell him she's going back to Panama.

The next episode after that we'll see the two of them packing up Gino's house, in preparation for their move to Miami... 

[AR Traveler]

What does Clayton do for work?  

Anali is now thinking "What the hell am I doing here?"  No real friends, a guy who makes love to his computer, Mom in the closet (I'm sure that smells lovely), and animals all over the place.  

Agreed that Devin is not mature enough to marry, and frankly, neither is Nick.  I haven't cared for Father Devin, but I too would have been irritated with Nick's laughing (which I hope was nervousness).   Devin is acting like my kids when we went shopping for school clothes.  Girl, finding a dress is the easy part.  Are you ready to spend 50 years with a guy who of course will call you "Piggy"?  Is he ready to spend 50 years with a woman who acts like a twelve year old, slamming herself into the bedroom and refusing to talk?  If you don't have the skills to communicate (let alone the same language), you're toast.

Anali just needs to face the truth and the green card fading like Marty McFly's photograph: She's not attracted to Clayton! In fact, she's downright turned the hell off.  Even Isaac Hayes wouldn't get it going for her.  

What would possess Gino to take Jasmine to Miami?  Just wait, she wants to move down there in a millisecond (I can't blame her there).  Staid old Michigan is not doing it for her.  Neither is weird old Gino, but it's like they're pretending they're compatible.

Igor is probably a horse's butt, however, Nikki, you assumed that he felt the same way during the visa process!  You didn't have a conversation and then literally have a meltdown when you find out he had a fuckbuddy.  Give me a break.  He's not into you either.  Why he agreed to this charade, i don't know (Fame? Green Card?)

I hope to hell Sam is clean, but he's still too damaged and disorganized to marry.  Yeah, Yom Kippur is a Muslim holiday.  Oh boy.  Maybe he should crack a book about Islam real fast.

 

 

[anoninrva]

1 hour ago, AR Traveler said:

Agreed that Devin is not mature enough to marry, and frankly, neither is Nick.  I haven't cared for Father Devin, but I too would have been irritated with Nick's laughing (which I hope was nervousness).   

Clayton works in IT.  Some sort of security consultant.  He probably works from home mostly, if not exclusively.

 

Father Devin I had a lot more sympathy for.  Granted, I don't have a daughter, but I do have sons and a niece, and imagining their fiance constantly berate them like that, I don't think I could countenance either.  Now, why that river boat was left outside to be cleaned like that, I don't know.  But it seemed like overall he was a lot calmer with Nick than I could imagine being.

[politichick]

Anali needs to catch the first thing smokin' back to Peru. Her man is a weird boy, with disgusting table manners. Why is she there? She's not even physically attracted to him?

Devin is a complete weirdo. The Korean dress was beautiful and the gold was nowhere near her face. The first gown she tried on in the shop was also very simple, elegant, and lovely. WTF is wrong with her and what does what's-his-name see in her? And what's up with her mother's hair in the back? The black hair looks weird and she cannot even see it, so, WHY?

Tattoo/ex-drug addict guy is weird, too. Why is that woman with him?

Rob is bloody awful, too.

[anoninrva]

4 minutes ago, politichick said:

Anali needs to catch the first thing smokin' back to Peru. Her man is a weird boy, with disgusting table manners. Why is she there? She's not even physically attracted to him?

Devin is a complete weirdo. The Korean dress was beautiful and the gold was nowhere near her face. The first gown she tried on in the shop was also very simple, elegant, and lovely. WTF is wrong with her and what does what's-his-name see in her? And what's up with her mother's hair in the back? The black hair looks weird and she cannot even see it, so, WHY?

Tattoo/ex-drug addict guy is weird, too. Why is that woman with him?

Rob is bloody awful, too.

I agree that Anali seems to have caught "the ick".

Devin, I sympathize with, particularly with feeling overweight due to all of the constant negging from Nick.  She thought her arms looked fat/   I'm not particularly fond of gold either, but that reaction seemed a bit extreme.  I think their odds of finding a traditional Korean wedding dress in BFE Arkansas strip malls are infinitesimal, but let's see how that goes.  Dress shopping seems to be a staple on this show anyway.  I suspect producer shenanigans somewhat.

Rob really comes across as shallow and spiteful.  They're very young and immature.  I will say, though, if she wants to *act* on being bisexual, his stance isn't really that unreasonable here.  Either they're both swinging, or neither of them is.

[1011101010001]

2 hours ago, anoninrva said:

Either they're both swinging, or neither of them is.

Maybe he thinks he can get the straight guy fantasy of a MFF threesome but they are both so insanely jealous I can’t see either one not having a tantrum when there is interaction by one with the third party.

[DiamondGirl]

If Citra is so devout, why does she not wear the hijab like her sisters do?  I agree with Sam’s mother, that you should not be forced to convert to a totally unknown religion.  It would be different if he had some interest in that religion but he doesn’t.  
 

Devin has some kind of emotional disorder.  Her family knows it and she is not emotionally prepared to be married to anyone.  I dislike Nick very much regardless.

[Quof]

3 hours ago, politichick said:

The Korean dress was beautiful and the gold was nowhere near her face

Devin "I hate gold", opens box containing a dress with a hint of gold.

Flashbacks to Four Weddings.   Bride 1 "I  hate flowers.  If there are flowers, I will be ill".   Cue Bride 2 "My entire wedding will take place inside a flower."  

[Stuckathome]

38 minutes ago, DiamondGirl said:

Devin has some kind of emotional disorder.  Her family knows it

Yes, this x100. You could tell that her sister is just OVER her behavior and has been dealing with Devin's "special" personality all her life and is used to the coddling and walking on egg shells. It's funny, no one else in her family talks like they have a mouth full of shit and seems semi-comatose. Does the girl ever smile?? Laugh? She acted like a spoiled middle schooler at the dress shop. 

Anali and Clayton are doomed....it's just a question of how badly she wants that green card. I get that he is very introverted and his world is pretty much online. However, I would think he would be excited enough at having his fiance there physically that he would cut back on the gaming to actually go out and do things with her.

Sam and Citra.....oh boy. I feel for him because it seems like he clearly loves her and wants to live a good, clean and sober life off drugs. Maybe he thinks converting will help him stay clean?? Addiction is a bitch and I hope he can stay clean. I can't help but compare this couple to Omar and Avery from a past season; she converted prior to meeting him online and was fully committed to her new religion and lifestyle. Sam is converting because he has to in order to marry the woman he loves and I dont' think he plans to actually attend mosque, fast, etc. His ignorance and his family's I didn't find odd given where they live and their background (in terms of exposure to Muslims etc).  I loved that they showed him unwrapping brand new pillows and cleaning prior to her arrival (compared to Gino and Jasmine lol). 

[1011101010001]

4 hours ago, Stuckathome said:

I would think he would be excited enough at having his fiance there physically that he would cut back on the gaming to actually go out and do things with her.

He probably just wants someone to have sex with and as she is not complying sees no reason to feign interest in her.

[Peppermint]

Nicole did the one sentence " I got no clue what the Koran says" Muslim conversion, and look how that turned out for her.

Sam "I'ma gonna be a Muslim in 4 days" as he sucks down another beer. Genuine outrage here as I watch yet one more 90 Day Fiance disrespect another's religion. Lookin' at you, Kim.

Hoping Omar and Avery are still safe and happy together.

 

[1011101010001]

1 hour ago, Peppermint said:

as he sucks down another beer

Aren’t drug addicts supposed to abstain from alcohol as well?

[Gobi]

5 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

Aren’t drug addicts supposed to abstain from alcohol as well?

It's okay, he has a prescription for the beer.

[anoninrva]

10 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

Aren’t drug addicts supposed to abstain from alcohol as well?

Traditional NA/AA, sure.  He says he's on suboxone, which I hadn't even realized was for long-term management, but that is supposed to prevent you from *wanting* to abuse narcotics as it blocks the receptors that give you the high feeling.  I'm sure there are smarter people here that can correct me.

[cheewhiz]

On 12/11/2023 at 11:26 AM, DiamondGirl said:

Devin has some kind of emotional disorder.  Her family knows it and she is not emotionally prepared to be married to anyone.  I dislike Nick very much regardless

The look between the mom and the sister was really telling. She does this often.

[Scarlett45]

On 12/11/2023 at 11:26 AM, DiamondGirl said:

If Citra is so devout, why does she not wear the hijab like her sisters do?  I agree with Sam’s mother, that you should not be forced to convert to a totally unknown religion.  It would be different if he had some interest in that religion but he doesn’t.  
 

Devin has some kind of emotional disorder.  Her family knows it and she is not emotionally prepared to be married to anyone.  I dislike Nick very much regardless.

She might just not care to wear it. I know a number of devout Muslim women who don’t cover their hair outside of attending mosque. 
 

I don’t think Sam is being forced to covert, but if Citra feels being married to another Muslim is a non negotiable for her, and Sam wants to marry her, then he should think sincerely if he wants to do this. Actually practice the faith not just appease Citra. 

On 12/11/2023 at 12:16 PM, Stuckathome said:

Sam and Citra.....oh boy. I feel for him because it seems like he clearly loves her and wants to live a good, clean and sober life off drugs. Maybe he thinks converting will help him stay clean?? Addiction is a bitch and I hope he can stay clean. I can't help but compare this couple to Omar and Avery from a past season; she converted prior to meeting him online and was fully committed to her new religion and lifestyle. Sam is converting because he has to in order to marry the woman he loves and I dont' think he plans to actually attend mosque, fast, etc.

I don’t think so either. Which I think means a world of pain for both of them. 

[Stuckathome]

On 12/12/2023 at 6:02 AM, Gobi said:

he has a prescription for the beer.

😃😆 yeah....loved how the camera lingered on all the booze at the table. Sam and his family seem like simple rednecks in the middle of bumfuck nowhere, USA. They may not be stupid necessarily, but worldly and educated they are not---doesn't make them bad people, but I expect Citra will struggle if she stays. The issue of an addict still drinking reminded me of a story my husband tells often (I tease him it is the only story he EVER tells) when talking about his ex MIL. At the time he had quit drinking and been sober for a bit. She offered him a drink and he told her he was sober and an AA member. She said oh, I am a recovering alcoholic too, I can teach you how to drink responsibly, here have a rum and coke. 

My point is, Sam's family may be of that mindset as well....even if he is an addict, nothing wrong with a beer now and then, just "be responsible Sam." And honestly, it is possible to be a drug addict and not an alcoholic and vice versa. 

[1011101010001]

13 minutes ago, Stuckathome said:

And honestly, it is possible to be a drug addict and not an alcoholic and vice versa. 

Extremely rare and I bet drinking is what led him back to the opioids.

https://www.hackensackmeridianhealth.org/en/healthu/2022/06/30/can-you-drink-alcohol-in-recovery-from-drug-addiction

[Emma Snyder]

Please keep your comments to the show and refrain from suggestions of who may/may not require plastic surgery. Such discussion violates the site's Inclusion Policy. 

[Back Atcha]

On 12/11/2023 at 3:44 PM, MrBuhBye said:

He probably just wants someone to have sex with and as she is not complying sees no reason to feign interest in her.

Anali is probably not "complying" because he shows such LITTLE interest in her.  He doesn't know how humans interact outside of online activities.  

[Back Atcha]

On 12/11/2023 at 12:05 AM, anoninrva said:

Father Devin I had a lot more sympathy for.  Granted, I don't have a daughter, but I do have sons and a niece, and imagining their fiance constantly berate them like that, I don't think I could countenance either. 

I don't feel that Nick is "berating" Devin with the "Piggy" nickname.  He probably thinks it's cute/endearing...and a private joke--maybe it's a Korean thing.  She needed to explain how hurtful it sounds to Americans--and how HE will be judged...is being judged.  Her father and Nick need to come to an understanding about it.  Nick is not criticizing her as far as I'm concerned, but it's best if he loses his "endearing nickname" for her.  Dump the cute plushies too.

[anoninrva]

6 hours ago, Back Atcha said:

I don't feel that Nick is "berating" Devin with the "Piggy" nickname.  He probably thinks it's cute/endearing...and a private joke--maybe it's a Korean thing.  She needed to explain how hurtful it sounds to Americans--and how HE will be judged...is being judged.  Her father and Nick need to come to an understanding about it.  Nick is not criticizing her as far as I'm concerned, but it's best if he loses his "endearing nickname" for her.  Dump the cute plushies too.

In isolation, I'd be fine with just chalking that up to cultural differences (although I have Korean friends and I've never heard them have any particular affinity for pigs), but grabbing her stomach, telling her relatives that Koreans think Americans are fat, lazy, and eat fried food (while they're eating fried food!),  etc, I think there's more going on that we're not seeing on the show.

[1011101010001]

3 hours ago, anoninrva said:

In isolation, I'd be fine with just chalking that up to cultural differences (although I have Korean friends and I've never heard them have any particular affinity for pigs), but grabbing her stomach, telling her relatives that Koreans think Americans are fat, lazy, and eat fried food (while they're eating fried food!),  etc, I think there's more going on that we're not seeing on the show.

I was thinking the outraged family friend was thinking if he thinks Devin is overweight what does he think of me. 

[Back Atcha]

3 hours ago, anoninrva said:

telling her relatives that Koreans think Americans are fat, lazy, and eat fried food (while they're eating fried food!),  etc, I think there's more going on that we're not seeing on the show.

Did he simply announce his opinion?  I thought he was asked what Koreans thought about Americans.  Apparently he felt we they could handle the truth.

Edited December 14, 2023 by Back Atcha

[Scarlett45]

13 hours ago, Back Atcha said:

I don't feel that Nick is "berating" Devin with the "Piggy" nickname.  He probably thinks it's cute/endearing...and a private joke--maybe it's a Korean thing.  She needed to explain how hurtful it sounds to Americans--and how HE will be judged...is being judged.  Her father and Nick need to come to an understanding about it.  Nick is not criticizing her as far as I'm concerned, but it's best if he loses his "endearing nickname" for her.  Dump the cute plushies too.

What gets me is that Devin doesn’t like it. If she doesn’t like it and it bothers her then he should cut it out, even if in his culture/language the name wouldn’t be particularly offensive. 

I agreed with her Dad. If she hates it that much he should cut it out. 

[Stuckathome]

16 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

I agreed with her Dad. If she hates it that much he should cut it out. 

I agree.

But has she ever really told him...? this woman so far has barely uttered an intelligible sentence or fully opened her eyes. She shuffles around with a mopey dopey face like a 90s stoner (I say this as someone who was in HS in the 90s and she reminds me of a stoner chick in my class). 

My ex in laws did something similar the first time they came to the States---loudly proclaiming disgust every single time we saw an obese person. AT least it was in Spanish though so not everyone understood. Isn't it sad though that a size 6-8 woman is still considered fat in Korea?? 

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, Stuckathome said:

I agree.

But has she ever really told him...? this woman so far has barely uttered an intelligible sentence or fully opened her eyes. She shuffles around with a mopey dopey face like a 90s stoner (I say this as someone who was in HS in the 90s and she reminds me of a stoner chick in my class). 

My ex in laws did something similar the first time they came to the States---loudly proclaiming disgust every single time we saw an obese person. AT least it was in Spanish though so not everyone understood. Isn't it sad though that a size 6-8 woman is still considered fat in Korea?? 

Nick said that Devin said she didn’t like it but got used to it because he just kept at it. Like WUT??! Seems he was very inconsiderate of her feelings. 
 

Reminds me of a trend I’ve noticed where certain cultural groups will nickname babies/toddlers “monkey” because they climb. As an ADOS person that is highly offensive and a huge fucking NO- there might not be any ill intention on Nick’s part but hit hurts Devin (you know the woman he loves and claims to want to marry) so the appropriate response is to just not do it any more. 
 

There are more obese people in the USA than in Korea, but I don’t think Nick is so obtuse that he doesn’t know critiquing strangers weight in public isn’t often done in the USA (or even Australia where they met). A part of me thinks he just wants to be shocking and edgy and has no social graces. 

20 hours ago, Back Atcha said:

Did he simply announce his opinion?  I thought he was asked what Koreans thought about Americans.  Apparently he felt we they could handle the truth.

Yeah he did announce his opinion. But there’s a thing about social appropriateness and social graces when you’re meeting people for the first time and don’t have an intimate relationship with them. 
 

I am not going to show up to a stranger’s home and when they ask me “what do people think about x” tell them ONLY a bunch of negative stereotypes. It would’ve been different if he said “it’s a stereotype that there’s a lot of junk food here, so many places to shop, and everything is spread out” that would’ve been one thing. 
 

When the USC partner visits a foreign country and does nothing to lament about stereotypes they are often portrayed as ignorant, I think the same standards apply to Nick. The statement was in poor taste. And then he grabbed Devin’s stomach after the fact. It was reality tv gold but I think her Dad responded well. 

[Back Atcha]

Devin misses a lot of social cues and, for some reason, has been coddled by her parents.  She's been "entitled" for too long.  She seems to expect everyone to understand what she wants and needs.  Perhaps a good work-up by a doctor in the largest nearby city will open everyone's eyes.

I don't think this relationship will last if the couple continues to live with her family.

[1011101010001]

14 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Reminds me of a trend I’ve noticed where certain cultural groups will nickname babies/toddlers “monkey” because they climb. As an ADOS person that is highly offensive and a huge fucking NO

Her pet name for him is Monkey.

[Scarlett45]

19 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

Her pet name for him is Monkey.

Yeah to me that is horrifying.
 

If he likes it than it’s cute. But if he found it horrifying she should stop it. 

[1011101010001]

19 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Yeah to me that is horrifying.
 

If he likes it than it’s cute. But if he found it horrifying she should stop it. 

I think the optics of a white person calling a person of another race monkey should be evident to her.  Perhaps she has had a sheltered upbringing.

[magemaud]

On 12/10/2023 at 11:33 PM, MrBuhBye said:

What exactly does Anali see in Clayton?  She isn’t attracted to him, she doesn’t like his apartment, his lifestyle, his pets, or his family.  

Hasta nunca! 

[Back Atcha]

15 minutes ago, magemaud said:

Hasta nunca! 

Que?

On 12/16/2023 at 5:56 PM, MrBuhBye said:

Perhaps she has had a sheltered upbringing.

Her behavior(s) may have caused her upbringing to be more sheltered than anyone else in the family.  Developmental difficulties?  "Working" her family?

[Stuckathome]

On 12/16/2023 at 7:56 PM, MrBuhBye said:

I think the optics of a white person calling a person of another race monkey should be evident to her.  Perhaps she has had a sheltered upbringing.

or just a "Southern" upbringing....I mean, I can't remember which state it is that has or had (recently too) textbooks that flat out said slavery was a sort of social security system which provided job training to the slaves and that they received room and board plus that training and "free medical" in exchange for the work. 

[Polliwollidoodle]

My favorite quote- which has been mentioned several times in this thread- was when Sam's family asked if Muslims celebrate  Christmas and I thought he said " I wanna say it's Yom Kippur". 

That will keep replaying in my brain.

[gaPeach]

On 12/9/2023 at 12:11 AM, MrBuhBye said:

Nikki breaks down after Justin's news

Nikki didn't just breakdown, she wanted to leave.  I get being upset about it but she was ready to end it and go home.  She immediately accused him of using her blah blah blah.  Was it shitty he had hook ups, yeah but that did not indicate he was using her and that she said many times "I KNEW IT".  If you knew it and still accepted his proposal, what are you complaining about?  She is full of shit and again is just wanting attention.  I can see her demanding sex from him to make up with her.  She is a Hilda Beast.

Ashley-Girl, you just want to get married so find someone else.  Maybe from this country, has a job, has his own money and place to live.  Now that is a good start.  Run girl run.

Edited January 17 by gaPeach

[pH-factor]

Sam is using suboxone because he's NOT getting clean when I worked where we also dealt with detox prior to getting in rehab we didn't take folks wanting methadone or suboxone as the opiates that supposedly have a blocker so you don't get "high".  If you want of drugs then we are taking you OFF all your narcotics.

[ChristmasJones]

Nick's way of speaking about "fat" Americans, using the term piggy, etc., did not completely surprise me based on some personal experiences I've had with people who have moved to the US from Asia, in both cases China, who were very open and blunt in how they spoke about people's weight.  It made me wonder if it is more culturally acceptable to make comments about appearance. 

Out of curiosity, I just googled "call people fat in China" and found this article which seems to support that there are deeper cultural elements behind comments like that - https://www.vice.com/en/article/neq3ak/people-called-me-fat-in-china 

This is not to say that Nick should keep doing this, of course.