S02.E10: Kiss Kiss Clang Clang

[TexasGal]

Quote

After a surprising hookup, the chef ices people out; a family comes aboard and enjoys a meal in a remote location; the tender nearly capsizes as the crew races to free it from a disappearing island; a mistake on deck causes the boat to hit the dock.

Airdate: 08.21.2023

[Emmeline]

Chef was flirting with João since he came in the boat.  Now she can have at it since Culver is he’s into Jaimee.

The charter guests were lovely.  

[SemiCharmedLife]

That was an interesting island picnic. The timeline definitely contributed to suspense and drama. The guests seemed great and it was cool that Margot came from a nearby city. 
 

i don’t blame Cheffy for taking some time to process her feelings about the Culver/Jaime hookup. Every time Culver had to raid the fridge for scraps, I laughed with glee. She will have to come to some peace with the new relationship, though, since they all work together so closely.

[WhiskeyVictor]

51 minutes ago, SemiCharmedLife said:

That was an interesting island picnic. The timeline definitely contributed to suspense and drama. The guests seemed great and it was cool that Margot came from a nearby city. 

It would have made the viewing all the more thrilling to see some sharks circling the sandbar just as the tide washed over it, but no, Bravo couldn't arrange for any sharks for this episode.  😉

Wow. Culver finally got some. I was beginning to think he was all talk...and teeth.

[aghst]

Don’t get the appeal of the sand bar.  Just a mound of sand, no tree cover, no variety of terrain.

They chose it so the crew had to race the clock before getting grounded.

Family flew from Wisconsin to Australia, probably connected through Sydney or Brisbane and then separate flight to Cairns.

All for a 1-night charter, may have been 30 hour trip, 3 or 4 flights.

It sounded like one of the kids was saying they learned they were coming out and didn’t have a lot of time to before they left to come do the show.  So maybe they have potential charter guests lined up and they don’t know where they’re going because they could be shooting on one of 4 or 5 different BD shows.

Culver and Jaimee don’t owe Tzarina anything.  But it didn’t seem organic that they kept talking about her being mad at them.  While they were in the shower and she was moaning — and Joao is just outside the bathroom — then she’s talking about cheffy being mad.

Either they looped in those lines later or she said it while they were in the process of making out or having sex?  Just seems like a strange thing to say when they’re supposedly hot and heavy.  Seems like it could be performative.

 

[iMonrey]

8 hours ago, aghst said:

Don’t get the appeal of the sand bar.  Just a mound of sand, no tree cover, no variety of terrain.

They chose it so the crew had to race the clock before getting grounded.

And the editing tried to make it look like the sand bar was disappearing faster than it was. Overhead shots showed it almost completely submerged but when they cut back to the guests they were still surrounded by dry sand. I think they all had plenty of time and the "suspense" was entirely manufactured.

I do see the appeal of it though, although I wonder how hot it was under direct sunlight. Maybe the ocean breeze surrounding them kept them cool enough. 

I thought this was a rather boring episode though (along with the one that followed). I'm not really interested in the whole Culver/Jaimee/Cheffy thing, it's just so juvenile. 

Of course Culver would cut the sleeves off his uniform shirt. It probably kills him having to wear a shirt at all. 

For some reason I also noted that Jaimee is wearing a man's watch - a Timex, I believe. 

[dleighg]

Margot, Margot, what were you thinking. Saying "you aren't looking for a serious relationship, right?" So it sounds like "we're not about to get engaged, right? We can just fool around?" when SHE MEANT "I don't have the hots for you." Of course he misinterpreted it.

[aghst]

44 minutes ago, iMonrey said:

And the editing tried to make it look like the sand bar was disappearing faster than it was. Overhead shots showed it almost completely submerged but when they cut back to the guests they were still surrounded by dry sand. I think they all had plenty of time and the "suspense" was entirely manufactured.

I do see the appeal of it though, although I wonder how hot it was under direct sunlight. Maybe the ocean breeze surrounding them kept them cool enough. 

I thought this was a rather boring episode though (along with the one that followed). I'm not really interested in the whole Culver/Jaimee/Cheffy thing, it's just so juvenile. 

Of course Culver would cut the sleeves off his uniform shirt. It probably kills him having to wear a shirt at all. 

For some reason I also noted that Jaimee is wearing a man's watch - a Timex, I believe. 

They brought these grills and Tzarina had to squat over the sand to grill the steaks and lobster.

The place was just less than ideal for a beach picnic.

Usually for other picnics, they say the place they picked isn't nice enough, so they have to deal with rocks in the sand or not being able to plant the umbrellas or canopy for the sun cover.

This time, they didn't show the crew commenting on what a hassle it was to set up that picnic lunch.

Instead it was about the race to get everything done and get everyone out before the tide rolled in.

That was the intention in picking this spot, to show the crew making a dramatic getaway.  Joao told Jason they really needed Margot to help push the tender off the island before it could have capsized.

[Baltimore Betty]

I've been in Tzarina's shoes before, it does not feel good. I remember way back in the day when I had a roommate that made it a sport to go after any man I was interested in for no other reason but to make sure he was not interested in me...and then it hit me, it was not me that should feel insecure it was her.

Tzarina came on board at the beginning and said she was open to men and women, super chill about things and now she is pissed that Culver (ugh not a hill anyone would die on), passed on her and went for Jaimee who probably is a bit insecure and saw easy pickens and could stir up drama. 

If Tzarina wanted to sleep with Culver she had many opportunities to do that, did she think it was going to be a relationship?

Why do any of these numb nuts think these relationships are real and will last past the last docking of that boat?

That sandbar picnic was stupid, the guests were huddled around a tiny table, no shade then as soon as the last bite was swallowed the crew was basically telling them they had to leave.  They could have just had a swim and it would have been just as cool without having to take time to eat in a hurry.

 

[aghst]

Was it Tzarina and Culver who both appeared on WWHL a couple of weeks ago?

So whatever happened on the boat, they seem over it now.

 

[dosodog]

I think I would have enjoyed the sandbar picnic.  The experience of eating a meal in the middle of the ocean with absolutely nothing surrounding you, appeals to me for some strange reason.

[kitmerlot1213]

Culver is an idiot and I loved how incredibly done the producer sounded when he seriously asked if Culver needed an explanation on who Cupid is.

And Jaimee was sickening with her faux sympathy towards Tzarina but I did love Tzarina firmly telling her not to touch her--seriously on what planet did Jaimee think her "i'm sorry babe" routine was going to work?

Edited August 23, 2023 by kitmerlot1213

[nokat]

After listening to Culver talk about women, I am disgusted. He wants food, so he  fake cuddles up to "cheffy." Get a woman on the boat, and she will make your bed.

[65mickey]

Did Jamie come on the boat and the first night she was getting it on in the shower with Culver? God do these people have any self control? The first person that pays you any attention on a new job you sleep with? I think Bravo has changed the requirements for the crew to be are you willing to humiliate yourself and sleep with anyone after knowing them for one day? And are you willing to get drunk and embarrass yourself over an over?  These Below Deck shows are doing a disservice to the yachting industry.

[aghst]

4 minutes ago, 65mickey said:

Did Jamie come on the boat and the first night she was getting it on in the shower with Culver? God do these people have any self control? The first person that pays you any attention on a new job you sleep with? I think Bravo has changed the requirements for the crew to be are you willing to humiliate yourself and sleep with anyone after knowing them for one day? And are you willing to get drunk and embarrass yourself over an over?  These Below Deck shows are doing a disservice to the yachting industry.

That's what we're suppose to believe, that within hours of meeting him, she went into the shower in his room with him, while Joao was just outside.

Then said things about how Tzarina might be mad with her.

Just a strange thing to say when they're supposedly hot and heavy.

They either dubbed that in afterwards or the hookup was faked.

In the last few seasons of all BD shows, there seems to be more sex occurring on board.  And they are all audio, so we don't know for a fact that the moans and the things they say are happening in real time.

Other reality shows will have infrared cameras of couples going under the covers.

[dosodog]

I'm already over "Do you think Cheffy will be mad"?  Repeatedly through the episode.

Ma'am.  You were told she has a crush on him.  You chose to shrug that off and target your sights on Culver.  You hit the bullseye.  Blantly.  In front of the entire crew.

And now you're so concerned about Cheffy's feelings?  And trying to make me feel like somehow I should have sympathy for you?

No. 

[Jack Sampson]

43 minutes ago, 65mickey said:

Did Jamie come on the boat and the first night she was getting it on in the shower with Culver? God do these people have any self control? ... These Below Deck shows are doing a disservice to the yachting industry.

Hookup culture is everywhere.  Tons of girls do the same thing, especially when traveling or on spring break.  I lived in Vegas, it was an average weekend.

Based on what I've read online, I think this pretty accurately reflects the yachting industry.  But, in her case, she's probably just doing pre-advertising for her future OnlyFans account.  Last time I checked reddit, most of the BD women had one.

[dleighg]

37 minutes ago, Jack Sampson said:

But, in her case, she's probably just doing pre-advertising for her future OnlyFans account. 

and her answer to the producer's question of "do you always get what you want?" with a sly yes, told everything.

[howiveaddict]

3 hours ago, nokat said:

After listening to Culver talk about women, I am disgusted. He wants food, so he  fake cuddles up to "cheffy." Get a woman on the boat, and she will make your bed.

Be just wants a surrogate mommy who's like chef Kemm.  Also, I think Culver looks like and reminds me of Paul Lynde.   In many ways....

[nokat]

11 minutes ago, howiveaddict said:

Also, I think Culver looks like and reminds me of Paul Lynde.   In many ways....

I hadn't thought of that. Look at me, I'm so heterosexual. We don't care, just don't be a douche.

[WhiskeyVictor]

5 hours ago, Jack Sampson said:

Hookup culture is everywhere.

WHERE WAS "HOOKUP CULTURE" WHEN I WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL?!?!?

😟

[bosawks]

14 hours ago, dleighg said:

and her answer to the producer's question of "do you always get what you want?" with a sly yes, told everything.

I have no problem with her scoping out who or what would cause the most drama for air time just don't whine about it.

Edited August 23, 2023 by bosawks

[iMonrey]

15 hours ago, dosodog said:

Ma'am.  You were told she has a crush on him.  You chose to shrug that off and target your sights on Culver.  You hit the bullseye.  Blantly.  In front of the entire crew.

Again, it's hard to tell how serious Aesha was when she indicated there was something between Culver and the Chef. We only got that one brief comment and then they were off to the races. Clearly Jaimee took her cue from the way Culver responded to her rather than anything Aesha or Tzarina said. That said, she was clearly aware there might have been something there, and just as clearly didn't really care enough to find out before jumping in head first. 

[Tanukisan]

Like a viewer who’s had massive computer and network issues all week and just now is able to post, these comments are in the order of the episode scenes broadcast…

Right out of the gate on this episode there’s the implication that broken glass on the deck was the fault of the deck crew.  No.  Interior crew were there for the glass breakage and should have cleaned that up at the time or asked for help.  Shenanigans.

J-wow, referring to Culver when talking to the chef:  “Then he’s a dick and you know what he’s like.”  Yes.  Yes, indeed.  I’m starting to have faith in the concept of redemption if J-wow continues to exhibit wisdom.

Maybe Harry has more game than was thought – after all, Margot did end up “snuggling” with him.

Producer to Jaimee: “Do you always get what you want?”    Jaimee: “Yes.”     Ugh.  Dislike her.

And AGAIN Aesha is “helping” the Captain with his contact lenses.  Just get a room, you two.

Memo to guests – if you “want a holiday BBQ on the beach” – don’t charter a yacht.  Just go to the beach.

Poor chef.  As someone who was the very personification of “geek” in High School, her cheerleader/jock analogy struck painfully close.

These guests were so nice – and they have that “deer in the headlights” kind of look about them.  Which tells me they were lured – led – shanghaied into this expedition.

Culver – you’re complaining that your food needs are suffering?  Actions have consequences, dog!           

Aesha – “because most people are right-handed”.  Not all of us, sweetheart. 

Neanderthal Culver in a diaper as cupid?  Hilarious!

What will happen next week?  Will Culver get the cleaver?  Will Harry meet Sally?  Will the Kaiju-maru get its paint scratched?  Stay tuned, if you can sort it all out…

 

[Zaffy]

On 8/26/2023 at 4:19 AM, Tanukisan said:

Like a viewer who’s had massive computer and network issues all week and just now is able to post, these comments are in the order of the episode scenes broadcast…

aawww..and I thought you were on holidays!

[RoseAllDay]

On 8/22/2023 at 9:22 PM, howiveaddict said:

Be just wants a surrogate mommy who's like chef Kemm.  Also, I think Culver looks like and reminds me of Paul Lynde.   In many ways....

This is going to date me,  but oh well…

When I first saw Culver (I came in late to this season) what flashed in my mind were the morph-mouthed people in Soundgarden’s “Black Hole Sun” video. It’s all I see whenever that jerk’s on screen.

[Jel]

On 8/22/2023 at 4:35 PM, dosodog said:

I'm already over "Do you think Cheffy will be mad"?  Repeatedly through the episode.

Ma'am.  You were told she has a crush on him.  You chose to shrug that off and target your sights on Culver.  You hit the bullseye.  Blantly.  In front of the entire crew.

And now you're so concerned about Cheffy's feelings?  And trying to make me feel like somehow I should have sympathy for you?

No. 

Would Jamee been as interested in Culver if they hadn’t said “you can’t have him, he’s cheffies”? I think the competition was what spurred her on. She was really all over Culver that first night. Just throwing herself at him like it was her job. Culver. Don’t see the culver appeal. Don’t care for her at all. As George Costanza said, “You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister!”

[SemiCharmedLife]

On 8/30/2023 at 6:13 AM, Jel said:

Would Jamee been as interested in Culver if they hadn’t said “you can’t have him, he’s cheffies”? I think the competition was what spurred her on. She was really all over Culver that first night. Just throwing herself at him like it was her job. Culver. Don’t see the culver appeal. Don’t care for her at all. As George Costanza said, “You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister!”

It reminded me of Gary's behavior from BDSY.  When he came on the yacht late, due to Covid, he knew there were some flirtations going on between Mads and Alex, yet he pursued Mads anyway.  (He even used his rank to make himself look like a better catch.