S04.E12: Everyone's Invited

[gingerella]

2 hours ago, Notabug said:

Ethan probably makes the bulk of his income from TLC for the show.  For that matter, Olivia probably does, too.  There cannot be that big a market for a 'destination wedding photographer'.  I'm not sure why anyone would hire her instead of someone local at the site of the wedding.  I presume Olivia includes the cost of her travel and lodging in her prices which is going to make her significantly more expensive than a local. I've been to multiple destination weddings and none of them imported the photographer from elsewhere.  The venues usually had a list of local vendors that the couple could choose from and they could go online to see samples of the photographer's work and negotiate from there.

Destination wedding photographers are a big thing now and brides choose a photographer nowadays based on their portfolio and what their style is. We eloped and chose a photographer who was in thatbstate and could be at our wedding site on the day. We chose her firnher style. I'm sure there are alot of brides who like Olivia's style, and another subset of brides who'd Hite her because she's on a TV show.

[Loves2Dance]

The only thing I could think while watching was wondering why Olivia is still with Ethan?

He is a man child. Nor even an attractive man child. He offers nothing to their marriage. Nothing.

Olivia deserves better. 

2 hours ago, Notabug said:

Ethan probably makes the bulk of his income from TLC for the show.  For that matter, Olivia probably does, too.  There cannot be that big a market for a 'destination wedding photographer'.  I'm not sure why anyone would hire her instead of someone local at the site of the wedding.  I presume Olivia includes the cost of her travel and lodging in her prices which is going to make her significantly more expensive than a local. I've been to multiple destination weddings and none of them imported the photographer from elsewhere.  The venues usually had a list of local vendors that the couple could choose from and they could go online to see samples of the photographer's work and negotiate from there.

Olivia posted her 130th wedding nearly a year ago. I'm sure she is closer to 200 by now. Destination wedding photographers, if they're good, is actually a pretty in demand business. 

[Gharlane]

20 hours ago, TexasGal said:

And, how could we not be shown him scraping his nose in Jamaica?  C'mon!  That had to be hilarious!

I have a feeling Ethan scraped his nose while stoned and it didn't involve diving into shallow water, as he claimed. 🤔

13 hours ago, Salacious Kitty said:

Olivia will put up with him as long as there's a check from TLC involved. I also heard they moved to Tallahassee. 

Cool, I'll keep an eye out for them, but I probably won't recognize them. 

9 hours ago, Salacious Kitty said:

All credit to Micah. He seems to be a hard worker. Same goes to Lydia and Isaac who are holding down full time jobs. 

Kim's credit card bills won't pay themselves! 💸

[Notabug]

11 hours ago, Salacious Kitty said:

My point was that Ethan isn't even pretending to have a real job. He's totally reliant on the TLC check. At least Olivia has a business that can actually be worked into filming, as we saw with the Jamaica trip. 

We didn't actually see her working a wedding though, so it could've been a production storyline.

I had no idea destination wedding photographer would be a lucrative profession.  You'd think it would be better to hire someone local to the destination who knows the area, has taken lots of pictures at that location in the past and knows where and how to get the best shots.  Olivia, flying in and spending 90+% of her time vacationing with her husband and family isn't likely to have much inside knowledge of the place nor would she have the connections that a local photographer would have.  

[Dibs]

On 8/3/2022 at 12:53 PM, Gharlane said:

I was a bit surprised to hear Ethan had a credit card. I figured this "old fashioned" family would only pay for things with cash and checks.

I immediately got suspicious when Olivia claimed she was taking Ethan along for a wedding photography job, especially since I didn't see them hauling much luggage into the airport. I noticed Moriah's awkwardly stuffing food into her mouth but thought it was because no one gave them knives. 

Please tell me she didn't really attend my college! 😲

I am curious about Olivia's family, too. Was the footage they showed her mother or Kim and her? 

Good point!  I would have thought Lydia would rather have a place of her own than live with her father. 🤷‍♂️

Yeah, that was either very poorly contrived or no one in this group knows how to communicate. "Why aren't they inviting us to join them?" "Why aren't they joining us?" It was beyond frustrating. 😬

Lots of "old-fashioned" people use a credit card, but pay off the balance every month and therefore don't carry debt.  I do myself, not because I'm a fundamentalist, but because I'm cheap and don't want to pay interest.  I also enjoy the rewards points I get for using it...

Agree that Moriah has more common sense than the rest of the family put together.

It's possible Lydia doesn't earn enough to live on her own; also, I assume Barry will have joint custody and therefore "the little girls" will need mothering when they're not with Kim.  However, I wish everyone would stop picking them up and carrying them every week; they're not THAT little.

Olivia's family can be seen on the "Quiverful" documentary that also featured the Plaths (as a singing act) available free on YouTube.

Speaking of Olivia, again, girl has issues.  She constantly sabotaging situations and then crying victim.  Spouting psychobabble to conceal the fact that it's all (mostly) her own chaos she's creating.  My God, that woman is exhausting!  No wonder they're over it.

As for Kim, I really dislike her intimating, especially to "the little girls," that Barry is somehow too horrible and awful to live with and that she can't return until he's gone.  This goes way beyond an amicable divorce due to a midlife crisis (hers) and implies that he's somehow toxic, dangerous, or even criminal.  I wouldn't stand for it I were Barry, and I don't think Lydia and Amber are fans, either...

But as for the actual divorce, I'll believe it when I see it.  It wouldn't be the first fatality of TLC's bad influence, but could also be copy.

[Jeanne222]

I think Kim is happy as a clam in her apartment above her dance studio.

She's tired of wifeing and mothering. 

Shame on her. Those kids need her.  I'm sure she'll be with someone new soon!  Next season.

Barry already hinted about that and what it will be like.

Heck maybe they will all be better off.

Moriah and her ass hanging out on the river.  Ugg.  She is such an exhibitionest!

[gingerella]

9 hours ago, Notabug said:

We didn't actually see her working a wedding though, so it could've been a production storyline.

I had no idea destination wedding photographer would be a lucrative profession.  You'd think it would be better to hire someone local to the destination who knows the area, has taken lots of pictures at that location in the past and knows where and how to get the best shots.  Olivia, flying in and spending 90+% of her time vacationing with her husband and family isn't likely to have much inside knowledge of the place nor would she have the connections that a local photographer would have.  

Wedding photographers who specialize in destination events usually liaise with the on site wedding coordinator at the venue in question. In addition, there are networks of other photographers as well as in country fixers who can help pre-plan specific shoot locations if the couple wants to shoot off site from wherever their wedding is being held.

[Kiss my mutt]

When Kim and Barry (well, mostly Kim)were talking to the kids about the divorce and living arrangements, Lydia had a smug look on her face when she revealed she was going to “move in” with her dad, which I thought was a strange choice of words rather that sounded more intimate than it should. I don’t think anything untoward is going on, but she has some misguided feelings about her role. It’s no wonder since she’s had to be the adult for awhile now but it seems like she is in competition with Kim. This family has so many issues and this season has been hard to watch because we’re really seeing the fallout of from how they were raised and then the 180 Kim is doing and expecting them to get with the new program. Hell, she’s the cool mom going out drinking with her kids, but she won’t answer for the trauma she has caused. It’s got to feel like a real slap in the face. It sure makes me feel like slapping HER face. 
 

Olivia’s handling of the grave visitation was a huge fail. She’ll take Ethan to Jamaica, shower him with attention and new experiences but what he really needs is an apology and probably a divorce. 

[ChristmasJones]

For anyone who is watching the Real Housewives of Atlanta ... do you recall Sonia (sp?) emphasizing how marijuana is illegal in Jamaica to the other housewives?   Maybe she is just saying that because she is going there for professional reasons. 

Edited August 6, 2022 by ChristmasJones

[Back Atcha]

12 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

I think Kim is happy as a clam in her apartment above her dance studio.

She's tired of wifeing and mothering. 

Shame on her. Those kids need her.  I'm sure she'll be with someone new soon!  Next season.

Barry already hinted about that and what it will be like.

Heck maybe they will all be better off.

• "Shame on her. Those kids need her.  I'm sure she'll be with someone new soon!  Next season."     
• Do those kids need really her in her present "transitional" and dissatisfied state?
• I thought she was "tired" of taking care of children; now she's changed her tune--she's just tired of Barry.
• If she gets to stay in the house (so unfair) and keep the children (also unfair) will she be bringing home "new friends," "good friends," or "uncles" often?  Some could be sincerely interested in her, but others may be interested in some TV screen time.

[Back Atcha]

17 hours ago, Gharlane said:

On 8/4/2022 at 8:40 PM, Salacious Kitty said:

All credit to Micah. He seems to be a hard worker. Same goes to Lydia and Isaac who are holding down full time jobs. 

Kim's credit card bills won't pay themselves! 💸

EXXX-ELLENT !!!   That's Dr. Plath, I'll have you know.

[Back Atcha]

13 hours ago, Dibs said:

Lots of "old-fashioned" people use a credit card, but pay off the balance every month and therefore don't carry debt.  I do myself, not because I'm a fundamentalist, but because I'm cheap and don't want to pay interest.  I also enjoy the rewards points I get for using it...

It took decades for me (dumped mom with two young boys...at the time) to be in a position to become/stay debt-free (except for my mortgage).  I use one credit card for almost everything.  It's also a good way of keeping track of where I'm spending my money.  And those points, DIBS!  Thost FABULOUS points!   Sometimes I "gift" them to my adult sons if they're traveling for concerts out of town...spring for car rental or airfare with points.  Religion? Fundamental Non-Believer.

Edited August 6, 2022 by Back Atcha

[Gharlane]

4 hours ago, ChristmasJones said:

For anyone who is watching the Real Housewives of Atlanta ... do you recall Sonia (sp?) emphasizing how marijuana is illegal in Jamaica to the other housewives?   Maybe she is just saying that because she is going there for professional reasons. 

I went to Jamaica once during a cruise. I don't recall what the legal status of marijuana was at the time (circa 2010), but I do remember Princess Cruise warning us not to get any or bring any home with us.

[Notabug]

12 hours ago, Gharlane said:

I went to Jamaica once during a cruise. I don't recall what the legal status of marijuana was at the time (circa 2010), but I do remember Princess Cruise warning us not to get any or bring any home with us.

Jamaica decriminalized marijuana in 2015.  It is legal to possess small amounts for personal use.  I believe it is something like up to 2 oz. is legal.  People can also have up to 5 plants for personal use.

There are also medical marijuana laws in Jamaica, so it is a little different for someone with a prescription.

Jamaica's laws are currently very similar to US laws in states where marijuana is legal.

[GreenlinetoHarlem]

On 8/5/2022 at 1:20 PM, Jeanne222 said:

Moriah and her ass hanging out on the river.  Ugg.  She is such an exhibitionest!

I am not offended by this but it will be a good sign that she is maturing when she stops dressing like this. Right now, she still needs to feel that her parents will accept her no matter what  and it's a good test for them and everyone else, apparently. She was dead right when she picked up that Max was disapproving of her way of dressing and it was very important and super healthy that she didn't change to please him. In hindsight, great call, Moriah!

I'm super impressed with Micah. He seems so grounded, healthy and sweet. Also very emotionally intelligent! There are some nice kids in this family. They did a lot wrong but some things right, Barry and Kim. I can't figure out if Kim is a villain or not, but I hope not. Olivia was too young when she got involved with all this to be a villain to me. I really wish everyone the best, and I'm glad they are all less screwed up than I would have predicted a couple of years ago. I think the divorce is good news for everyone. Olivia and Ethan should be next- they are obviously not compatible!

[gingerella]

9 hours ago, GreenlinetoHarlem said:

I'm super impressed with Micah. He seems so grounded, healthy and sweet. Also very emotionally intelligent! There are some nice kids in this family. They did a lot wrong but some things right, Barry and Kim

Sometimes kids raise themselves despite who their parents are, and in spite of how their parents raised them. Im not willing to give Kim or Barry the benefit if Micah being a nice young man.

Edited August 8, 2022 by gingerella

[Jeanne222]

2 hours ago, gingerella said:

Sometimes kids raise themselves despite who their parents are, and in spite of how their parents raised them. Im not willing to give Kim or Barry the benefit if Micah being a nice young man.

Absolutely.  I've always pondered how some are able to rise above terrible backgrounds and be and achieve great things while others collapse from the burden.

I do give Barry a bit of an edge and think he might have been different if married to someone else.  Maybe some of Barry filtered down.

Read The Glass Castle and the author Jeanette Walls.  Dysfunction Junction.

[bichonblitz]

On 8/3/2022 at 7:47 PM, albarino said:

Lidia--Some day you will understand how terrible a mother you have.

I think she already realizes this and is struggling to have some sort of relationship with a narcissist mother. I hope she really does move in with Barry. 

[Kiss my mutt]

I think, with time, Lydia will become Kim’s biggest detractor. 

[RedDelicious]

I think Micah's a dick in nice boy clothing. His behavior towards Olivia is a red flag. He had no right nor was it his place to address Olivia's issues with Kim. That's something Ethan, Olivia's husband should be working on with her. Micah can f*ck right off.

[Shelbie]

3 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

I think she already realizes this and is struggling to have some sort of relationship with a narcissist mother. I hope she really does move in with Barry. 

I hope Lydia moves away from both of them and discovers for herself what she wants. 

[Ziggy]

21 hours ago, RedDelicious said:

I think Micah's a dick in nice boy clothing. His behavior towards Olivia is a red flag. He had no right nor was it his place to address Olivia's issues with Kim. That's something Ethan, Olivia's husband should be working on with her. Micah can f*ck right off.

Thank you!

I get that he and Moriah are annoyed that Olivia has such a problem with their mom.  So I do get that it affects him, and uncomfortable as it is, it's ok for him and Moriah to talk to Olivia about it from the perspective of how it affects them.  But he pushed it and acted like she owed him an explanation.

I kind of felt the same way when he talked to Max about Moriah.  That was completely inappropriate, but I do get that Moriah wanted him to do it.  Still weird.

[Notabug]

On 8/10/2022 at 12:28 PM, Ziggy said:

Thank you!

I get that he and Moriah are annoyed that Olivia has such a problem with their mom.  So I do get that it affects him, and uncomfortable as it is, it's ok for him and Moriah to talk to Olivia about it from the perspective of how it affects them.  But he pushed it and acted like she owed him an explanation.

I kind of felt the same way when he talked to Max about Moriah.  That was completely inappropriate, but I do get that Moriah wanted him to do it.  Still weird.

I think that Micah is also annoyed that Olivia keeps expecting him to take sides in her problems with his mom and I do think he has every right to tell her that it isn't fair and he doesn't want to be put on the spot.  It wasn't just about Olivia and Kim; it was Olivia's expectation that he and Moriah would participate in her ongoing boycott of their mother.  From what I saw, Olivia wasn't just expecting her husband to stand up for her and either tell Kim she was unwelcome or stay home with her; she wanted Micah and Moriah to endorse that position and do the same.  Olivia seems to have an issue with boundaries in that she wants everyone else to feel like she does about Kim.  I think Micah and Moriah were pretty quick to make up with Kim over their upbringing, but they are adults that is their choice.

I do agree he needed to stay out of Max and Moriah's breakup.  I think he might've been Max's friend before Moriah got involved with him, but, other than letting Max know he was distancing himself out of respect for his sister (what Lydia should've said, too), there was no need for other discussion.

Edited August 15, 2022 by Notabug

[Back Atcha]

Hmmm...it's apparent that Micah doesn't take after Kim---physically!   

[Back Atcha]

On 8/7/2022 at 2:56 PM, GreenlinetoHarlem said:

I can't figure out if Kim is a villain or not, but I hope not.

Manipulative. Narcissistic. Dishonest. Unfair. Lazy. Hypocritical.   So many examples for each of these words.

And, Kim IS the villain in this family.

[gingerella]

2 hours ago, Back Atcha said:

Hmmm...it's apparent that Micah doesn't take after Kim---physically!   

This looks very photoshopped. There is no way Barry has guns like that. And I don't think Micah's arms look like his either.

ETA: Im sure on my deathbed I will want back the precious life moments I just spent on this bullshit family.

Edited August 11, 2022 by gingerella

[Back Atcha]

 

Edited August 11, 2022 by Back Atcha

[gingerella]

🤮 I find that so over done, he looks like a freak. And I still don't think those are Barry's real arms,  no way.

[Madding crowd]

Olivia has a right to not see Kim, she doesn’t have a right to tell Ethan, Moriah and Micah they cannot see their mother. Olivia wants to be the star of the show and the ruler of the house. She constantly talks down to the Plath kids as if she weren’t raised exactly the same. I think her wedding photo business is getting a big boost from her being a TV star. There are talented wedding photographers in every state that won’t require payment of air fares, hotels and meals. She posts pics of the weddings on her TLC Instagram account. I liked her at first but now think she and Kim are two sides of the same coin. 
 

[Tallygirl]

We only really hear Olivia’s side of the story. I rewatched the first half of the first season. She doesn’t seem scared of Kim then, rather like she wants control. 
 

With the amount of depression Olivia has said she’s had, false memories could come into play. She would absolutely believe them to be true too. This happened with someone I know. 

[Gharlane]

14 hours ago, Tallygirl said:

We only really hear Olivia’s side of the story. I rewatched the first half of the first season. She doesn’t seem scared of Kim then, rather like she wants control. 
 

With the amount of depression Olivia has said she’s had, false memories could come into play. She would absolutely believe them to be true too. This happened with someone I know. 

I haven't watched the previous seasons,  but wasn't the previous one about Kim trying to sabotage Olivia and Ethan's marriage, at some poi t saying Olivia was "full of Satan"?

[Boston]

On 8/11/2022 at 1:49 PM, Back Atcha said:

Manipulative. Narcissistic. Dishonest. Unfair. Lazy. Hypocritical.   So many examples for each of these words.

And, Kim IS the villain in this family.

Wow.  You just described my mother. (She left the 4 of us (ages 8-16) and my father (who kept us) to f-around,) Moral of this family story is "the grass is NOT always greener".  The fallout has never ended.  She is alone.

[Tallygirl]

22 hours ago, Tallygirl said:

Has the family’s statement been posted on here? I just saw it on Micah’s and Lydia’s IG. From a week ago. I don’t follow them so I missed it. 

Edited August 13, 2022 by Tallygirl
Typo

[Ms.Lulu]

32 minutes ago, Tallygirl said:

Is the family’s statement been posted on here? I just saw it on Micah’s and Lydia’s IG. From a week ago. I don’t follow them so I missed it. 

Here you go:

[gingerella]

54 minutes ago, Ms.Lulu said:

Here you go:

😂😂😂

Maybe the real Satan is TLC?!? This is what happens when you sell your soul to TLC or Bravo...

ETA: Interesting that Ethan didn't  repost that drivel.

Edited August 13, 2022 by gingerella

[Back Atcha]

20 hours ago, Madding crowd said:

Olivia has a right to not see Kim, she doesn’t have a right to tell Ethan, Moriah and Micah they cannot see their mother.

She can (and should) tell people how she feels...and give good reasons.  Generally, no adult is under any obligation to take orders from another (unless someone is under contract).

[Madding crowd]

She tells them how she feels all the time, not her decision on whether they see their own mother.

[Tallygirl]

8 hours ago, Gharlane said:

I haven't watched the previous seasons,  but wasn't the previous one about Kim trying to sabotage Olivia and Ethan's marriage, at some poi t saying Olivia was "full of Satan"?

That’s what Olivia has said. I’m not sure that was televised. I’ll watch some more and see. But they are married already in season one, so not sure that was shown. I really can’t say for sure if she said it later on. I think Olivia said that Kim said that and then Barry and Kim were sorry Olivia thought they felt that way. They were speaking in terms of hate being the devils work?  Idk. I’m rewatching them slowly! 

Edited August 13, 2022 by Tallygirl
Typo

[b2H]

8 hours ago, Ms.Lulu said:

Here you go:

So I guess this storyline was entirely contrived and phony.

I won’t be back for any future seasons.  These people are heinous. 

I don’t care if TLC made them do this story or if it really happened and now it doesn’t, these kinds of things should not be made public.  The smaller kids had no choice in seeing their family go through this, living it every day.  The deceit that has been put forth here should make every participant ashamed.  

They should go back to their private lives, get honest jobs, and get out of the public eye.  Shut it down, TLC.

[Fouts]

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't recall seeing Olivia ever tell anyone that they shouldn't visit Kim or Barry.  Instead we've seen countless instances where Olivia calmly explains that she cannot see them, but that the others should do as they see fit.  The closest we got to Olivia involving the siblings was when Moriah asked Olivia to play keyboard for "the only first concert she'll ever have!" and Olivia responded that she could play only if the parents weren't in attendance.  (Which of course Kim later completely disrespected.  Nobody tells Kim what she can or can't do!)

The siblings' latest attempts to shame and guilt Olivia into dropping her boundaries is not much different from people telling a battered wife that she just needs to suck it up and return to her abusive spouse.  The siblings care only about their own personal discomfort and want nothing more than to pretend to themselves that their mom isn't a toxic and dangerous figure; nobody wants to acknowledge such evil in a close family member like that.  The siblings don't care whatsoever about the mental health of Olivia--someone who has been nothing but kind and supportive of them.  

Olivia speaks clearly about boundaries and how dysfunctional families labor to maintain their dysfunctional systems.  This suggests she receives excellent therapy from someone well-school in narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).  If anyone ever wants to go down a fascinating rabbit hole, do a little research on the subject.  Teachers of NPD could pull clips of Kim as demonstration.  One fascinating aspect of NPD is how closely narcissists follow the same pattern of behaviors, almost like they're operating from a playbook.  It's eerie, really.  

I suspect in the future viewers will become more sympathetic to victims of someone with NPD just as we've grown as a culture in our understanding of those suffering from PTSD or for someone having an alcoholic family member.  The victim isn't the problem in any of these situations.  

[gingerella]

19 hours ago, Fouts said:

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't recall seeing Olivia ever tell anyone that they shouldn't visit Kim or Barry.  Instead we've seen countless instances where Olivia calmly explains that she cannot see them, but that the others should do as they see fit.  The closest we got to Olivia involving the siblings was when Moriah asked Olivia to play keyboard for "the only first concert she'll ever have!" and Olivia responded that she could play only if the parents weren't in attendance.  (Which of course Kim later completely disrespected.  Nobody tells Kim what she can or can't do!)

The siblings' latest attempts to shame and guilt Olivia into dropping her boundaries is not much different from people telling a battered wife that she just needs to suck it up and return to her abusive spouse.  The siblings care only about their own personal discomfort and want nothing more than to pretend to themselves that their mom isn't a toxic and dangerous figure; nobody wants to acknowledge such evil in a close family member like that.  The siblings don't care whatsoever about the mental health of Olivia--someone who has been nothing but kind and supportive of them.  

Olivia speaks clearly about boundaries and how dysfunctional families labor to maintain their dysfunctional systems.  This suggests she receives excellent therapy from someone well-school in narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).  If anyone ever wants to go down a fascinating rabbit hole, do a little research on the subject.  Teachers of NPD could pull clips of Kim as demonstration.  One fascinating aspect of NPD is how closely narcissists follow the same pattern of behaviors, almost like they're operating from a playbook.  It's eerie, really.  

I suspect in the future viewers will become more sympathetic to victims of someone with NPD just as we've grown as a culture in our understanding of those suffering from PTSD or for someone having an alcoholic family member.  The victim isn't the problem in any of these situations.  

Thank you for writing this out so clearly, this is the best description of Olivia and her situation that anyone has posted here. Bravo. Olivia has literally given Ethan, Micah and Moriah a new lease on life by inviting Ethan's siblings into hers and Ethan's home to learn how to fly in the real world. She even gave them the opportunity to take their first trip out of the country to Jamaica and allowed them to tag along on a job trip, and they tried to guilt her into backing down on their mother during said trip. Assholes one and all.

I used to think Olivia and Ethan would work themselves out, but after this season's family fuckery, I think she's better off moving on. It will hurt at first, but she has great friends and once she finds a normal man, she will see how much better her life can be without Ethan and his Peter Pan damaged soul.

[RedDelicious]

On 8/13/2022 at 10:42 PM, Fouts said:

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't recall seeing Olivia ever tell anyone that they shouldn't visit Kim or Barry.  Instead we've seen countless instances where Olivia calmly explains that she cannot see them, but that the others should do as they see fit.  The closest we got to Olivia involving the siblings was when Moriah asked Olivia to play keyboard for "the only first concert she'll ever have!" and Olivia responded that she could play only if the parents weren't in attendance.  (Which of course Kim later completely disrespected.  Nobody tells Kim what she can or can't do!)

The siblings' latest attempts to shame and guilt Olivia into dropping her boundaries is not much different from people telling a battered wife that she just needs to suck it up and return to her abusive spouse.  The siblings care only about their own personal discomfort and want nothing more than to pretend to themselves that their mom isn't a toxic and dangerous figure; nobody wants to acknowledge such evil in a close family member like that.  The siblings don't care whatsoever about the mental health of Olivia--someone who has been nothing but kind and supportive of them.  

Olivia speaks clearly about boundaries and how dysfunctional families labor to maintain their dysfunctional systems.  This suggests she receives excellent therapy from someone well-school in narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).  If anyone ever wants to go down a fascinating rabbit hole, do a little research on the subject.  Teachers of NPD could pull clips of Kim as demonstration.  One fascinating aspect of NPD is how closely narcissists follow the same pattern of behaviors, almost like they're operating from a playbook.  It's eerie, really.  

I suspect in the future viewers will become more sympathetic to victims of someone with NPD just as we've grown as a culture in our understanding of those suffering from PTSD or for someone having an alcoholic family member.  The victim isn't the problem in any of these situations.  

THANK YOU. 

[Gharlane]

On 8/13/2022 at 12:50 PM, Ms.Lulu said:

Here you go:

Was this posted to VagueBook? 😀

[Notabug]

On 8/13/2022 at 10:42 PM, Fouts said:

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't recall seeing Olivia ever tell anyone that they shouldn't visit Kim or Barry. 

No, but we did see Olivia visibly upset that Ethan, Moriah and Micah chose to go to their brother's grave when Kim was going to be there, too, and complain about being left 'all alone' on the farm.  She clearly expected one or more of them to stay back with her rather than join the rest of the family at the cemetery.  Since they were going to visit their own brother's grave, a brother she never knew, that was a big ask on her part. She then went to the cemetery anyway and sat in the car pouting to remind everyone that she was unhappy.  Had she really been ok with everyone doing their own thing in regards to Kim; she would've been fine with waiting back at the farm for them to return rather than turning it into a situation.  I do understand that production undoubtedly wanted Olivia to go to the cemetery in hopes of provoking a response, so I do appreciate that she stayed in the car.  But, I don't think Olivia is as evolved and psychologically healthy as others here do.

While I agree with the family premise that production sets up storylines to tell the tale that they have scripted; they were the ones who 'acted' in those scenes, who said those words, who behaved in that way for the cameras.  No reality show provides a completely accurate slice of anyone's life; which is why people who don't want to play a role for the camera should probably opt out of appearing on them.  It also sounds to me like Kim has seen the overall response to her storyline this season; one in which she was a very active and vocal participant, and realized that the public wasn't going to cheer and applaud her amazing growth as an individual while she was seemingly leaving her youngest kids to be raised by their father and siblings.  After seeing all the negative flack she was getting, she apparently tightened the screws, got everybody but Olivia and maybe Ethan, back in line and spouting her version of the truth.  I don't doubt for a minute that all of her children were ordered to post that message on their social media accounts.

[RedDelicious]

I don't think Olivia is evolved or psychologically healthy at all, but she seems to be the only one facing her issues with the help of a licensed professional on a consistent basis. Doing the work doesn't make you perfect overnight, but at least she's actually trying.

[Fouts]

Notabug, I think you have great insight into what's up with the "We are not a divided family" announcement and Kim's probable freakout at her public portrayal and reception.  

I do, however, have a different take on what went down with Olivia on the cemetery visit day.  Olivia had been planning to attend and then got the last-minute information dump that Kim would be there, too.  The siblings put pressure on her to attend anyway and she caved--the high-stakes emotional element of the baby grave visit made it nearly impossible for her to decline.  She had essentially no time to process a quickly-moving situation and did the best she could at the time.  (And, of course, add to the mix some possible producer shenanigans.)

After Olivia arrived at the cemetery, the reality of coming face to face with her abuser was just too much.  I saw a panic attack as a result, not pouting.  And then Ethan--who should be protecting her as his spouse--and the siblings chose to punish her for it.  They did everything they could to shift blame of the family dysfunction onto her.  Their toxicity and hostility towards Olivia seems to have unified them at the moment, but that core is based on rot and Kim's narcissism.  It will not end well.  

[Madding crowd]

Olivia should know that Kim would go to the grave of her own son, she goes every year. I had the MIL from hell as well but no one will get thru life without ever having someone say mean things to them. If you get PTSD when someone says something about you, you better never go on social media or the workplace or anywhere. If Olivia has PTSD it’s from her own family and the way she was raised. She never needs to go somewhere where Kim goes but she cannot whine and be upset if others want to go.

As far as her giving some great life to the Plaths, she isn’t their mother or boss . Moriah lives with her because TLC wants to film them interacting together and Moriah is her only friend. TLC paid for the Jamaica trip for filming, Olivia’s wedding clients did not foot the bill for five people to have a week long vacation. All of these reality shows pay for ( discounted) vacations. I’m happy she is getting therapy and she seems to enjoying the months long trip she and Ethan have been taking in Europe. But I don’t agree she was a victim of sustained abuse by a few comments made. I also watch I Love a Momma’s Boy and every one of those Mother’s say worse things to those woman and they all are upset but aren’t claiming PTSD.

[Salacious Kitty]

Olivia wouldn't have claimed PTSD before therapy, either. She would have gotten upset and recognized a problem, and hated Kim. She got help and she's being vilified for it 

[Notabug]

32 minutes ago, Salacious Kitty said:

Olivia wouldn't have claimed PTSD before therapy, either. She would have gotten upset and recognized a problem, and hated Kim. She got help and she's being vilified for it 

I don't see Olivia being vilified for getting help, but I do fault her for expecting others to take sides in her relationship with Kim.

As for the cemetery trip, I realize we only see a tiny portion of what actually goes down, but, if Kim's presence was really going to be a deal breaker for Olivia, she should've said so and made sure that everyone understood that and there was no chance she would go if Kim was there. Or, been the bigger person and bowed out since she never knew Joshua and Kim was his mother, after all. Also, I didn't see Olivia caving into any of them at the farm, she clearly voiced her displeasure and Ethan and then Micah and Moriah left without her.  She said she didn't want to go if Kim was going to be there and she expected them to either fix it and un-invite her MIL or stay back at the farm with her.  It was someone from production who seemingly spoke to her and convinced her to ride to the cemetery with them where she chose not to leave the car.  We'll have to agree to disagree as to whether she was having a panic attack or trying to force the issue with her husband and his family.  I've seen panic attacks and that was not at all what I saw from her.

If Olivia feels that hating Kim and avoiding her presence forever is the best course for her, then, she needs to do that rather than continue to participate in a reality show where TPTB are constantly going to be creating situations to throw her and Kim into the same arena so we can watch them duke it out.  If she's seeing a therapist and getting such great help, you'd think she'd have come to that realization by now.  To me, it seems like she wants the money that the show provides and is perfectly willing to keep being put into conflict with Kim in order to cash in and get free trips and such.  She needs to own that, too.

Edited August 15, 2022 by Notabug

[Back Atcha]

5 hours ago, Madding crowd said:

All of these reality shows pay for ( discounted) vacations.

I believe the shows SUGGEST the destinations.  It was "surprising" one year when several different celebrities filmed TV episodes in Iceland.  What coincidences!!