S09.E09: Poison In The Honey

[Mrs. Hanson]

Just now, Baltimore Betty said:

 I thought of that too, I bet there have been a lot of times that she pulls some conditional angle to getting what she wants from them.

Danielle from Florida.....line 1!

[Baltimore Betty]

Just now, Mrs. Hanson said:

57 years here.  In the 70's and 80's here in the Twin Cities:  30 minute church ceremony followed by a buffet dinner at the VFW, KC Hall, Elk's Lodge, open bar and a DJ.  Couple stayed until the end to thank everyone for coming.  For the most part that is how it went down.  Now?  $10,000 to start for a venue?  Geezaloo no thank you.

Kobe:  I have a hunch Emily told him he could take over the business someday.  She lives in her own world.

I love that Kara took her boy to a very expensive venue to prove her point, if he wanted a car would she take him to a BMW dealership and say see, I told you so, cars are expensive.  Also I thought it was hysterical that this kid from the DR looked at that modern farmhouse style venue and wedding decor and said it would be the wedding of his dreams...really, that is the wedding you pictured your whole life?  Why can't they go to the court house and then have a few people for a nice dinner in a restaurant with a private party room?

What is Father Emily Big Tongue's business anyway?

[Pepper Mostly]

5 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

I love that Kara took her boy to a very expensive venue to prove her point, if he wanted a car would she take him to a BMW dealership and say see, I told you so, cars are expensive.  Also I thought it was hysterical that this kid from the DR looked at that modern farmhouse style venue and wedding decor and said it would be the wedding of his dreams...really, that is the wedding you pictured your whole life?  Why can't they go to the court house and then have a few people for a nice dinner in a restaurant with a private party room?

What 23 year old boy is dreaming of his perfect wedding? Unless it's something like "It would be totally rad to have it at the skate park and serve PBR's and nachos"? They expect us to buy that Guillermo has been doodling "Mr and Mrs" and lists of flowers and songs he likes in his diary? Jesus. They just had to retread the old "weddings are so expensive and my foreign fiance/e doesn't understand the value of a dollar and things are expensive in America" plot line. Its so beyond tired.  

And I am another old who remembers weddings from days of yore. You went to the church, then to the local VFW or  the church hall or something. A buffet was the norm. A "sit down" dinner was Fancy. A band. You got a little net bag of Jordan almonds as a "favor". My cousin got married in the late 70's and they had their reception at the Copley Plaza Hotel in Boston and it was the fanciest wedding I'd ever been to. 

Edited June 13, 2022 by Pepper Mostly

[Baltimore Betty]

1 minute ago, Pepper Mostly said:

What 23 year old boy is dreaming of his perfect wedding? Unless it's something like "It would be totally rad to have it at the skate park and serve PBR's and nachos"? They expect us to buy that Guillermo has been doodling "Mr and Mrs" and lists of flowers and songs he likes in his diary? Jesus. They just had to retread the old "weddings are so expensive and my foreign fiance/e doesn't understand the value of a dollar and things are expensive in America" plot line. Its so beyond tired.  

LOL.

Do we think he has a Pinterest page for his dream wedding?

Seriously tho, he did not envision a beach wedding? A beach wedding seems more in his lane seeing he comes from an island and worked at a resort.

G could Google wedding venues to see what things cost because if Kara isn't in to spending $1000 for a laptop then he should know 10 grand for a venue would be a hard no.

On 6/11/2022 at 6:16 PM, MrBuhBye said:

That’s a lot more than a kiss.

Maybe it was a penis kiss?

I cannot believe I just wrote that.

[Welshman in Ca]

20 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Kobe:  I have a hunch Emily told him he could take over the business someday.  She lives in her own world.

Exactly what I said, no way he is getting that idea in his head himself.

[Baltimore Betty]

2 hours ago, Cini said:

I think he said it was $750,000 or $800,000 if I remember correctly and that turned into “almost a million” and now “a million” . 

But what did he owe on it? He may not have had a lot of equity in it or it could have had a second mortgage...I do not think he is as well off as he says he is.

[anoninrva]

19 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

I love that Kara took her boy to a very expensive venue to prove her point, if he wanted a car would she take him to a BMW dealership and say see, I told you so, cars are expensive.  Also I thought it was hysterical that this kid from the DR looked at that modern farmhouse style venue and wedding decor and said it would be the wedding of his dreams...really, that is the wedding you pictured your whole life?  Why can't they go to the court house and then have a few people for a nice dinner in a restaurant with a private party room?

That struck me as Bilal-level gaslighting.  Granted, if her angle is, let's just get legally married now and have a ceremony later, that seems to be one of the more reasonable takes on this show, her way of going about proving her point was downright abusive.

Also, I live in that area, and no one who is not wealthy or really great at saving would consider it.  Her parents seemed comfortable, but not really in that income bracket, which again, stresses that she was not making this offer in good faith.  Our wedding was at the neighborhood clubhouse with light snacks, no bar, no band and modest flowers.

Edited June 13, 2022 by anoninrva

[Mrs. Hanson]

9 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

And I am another old who remembers weddings from days of yore. You went to the church, then to the local VFW or  the church hall or something. A buffet was the norm. A "sit down" dinner was Fancy. A band. You got a little net bag of Jordan almonds as a "favor". My cousin got married in the late 70's and they had their reception at the Copley Plaza Hotel in Boston and it was the fanciest wedding I'd ever been to. 

I went to a wedding in 1981, the reception was at the now burned down Decathlon Club and boy.....those parents made it RAIN.  The priest came and had a little wine and showed off his smooth dance moves!

Beach wedding?  No. Way. In. Hell.  People may not move out of the way, it is windy and loud.  With my luck a seagull would drop a load on my head.

[Shauna]

On 6/10/2022 at 9:56 PM, MrBuhBye said:

Her father was speaking truth to her lol.  I wanted him to say do you think if he gets a minimum wage job he will be able to support three people?

I wanted him to say:  we're already paying for the three of you for everything:  rent, car insurance, cell phone, diapers, wipes, food and you don't even shovel the shit in the horse stalls and you want me to pay for a wedding, too?  The answer to that is no. 

Emily and Kobe have a huge rude awakening coming when (and if) they finally make it into the real world and pay for rent (a mortgage is not in their future) and everything else the rest of us have to deal with. 

Kobe seems like a nice guy and Emily seems like a real bitch.  Hope he wakes up and returns to Cameroon.  Or, her bitchiness is all for the camera. 

John needs to stop working out as his head looks too small for his body. 

I am impressed, though, that he made the effort to learn Portuguese. 

[Baltimore Betty]

1 minute ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Beach wedding?  No. Way. In. Hell.  People may not move out of the way, it is windy and loud.  With my luck a seagull would drop a load on my head.

Yes, I hate the idea of a beach wedding, it is never a perfect scenario, baking in the hot sun, sand in your shoes, wind that makes a mess of your hair...how many brides have we seen fight their veils during their walk down the aisle and then at the vowels...Miona's eyebrows could melt down her face!

[Cini]

32 minutes ago, jabRI said:

I don't understand how Kobe was a 'civil engineer' with no education beyond high school? Unless he meant like a land surveyor? I don't understand how people come to this country with no clue what it will take to support yourself. You have internet access,  check the local job market and see what the requirements are.  I did that when moving out of state, back in the day when the only 'job market' information was newspaper ads.  Yeah, aging myself, but just saying if I could do it then, no excuse not to do it.

Kobe is a civil engineer like Jeniffer is an architect: They are not. Maybe it’s something he wanted to do at some time, maybe he worked as an assistant for a civil engineer, but he is not a civil engineer. I lived and worked in a West-African country for several years and would be very surprised to learn that in Cameroon you can become a civil engineer without a college degree. Melania Trump pretended to have a degree in architecture and design; and it wasn’t until she became First Lady that somebody decided to check into that. Kobe is simply counting on people believing him and being unable to check his claim.

I understand that people don’t like Emily, I don’t either, but I don’t understand the love for Kobe. He hasn’t done anything yet to show that he really  is a good guy. So, he was excited to meet his son, that doesn’t really prove anything. Seeing that people claim that he was a successful business man in Cameroon, did he spend any of his money to support his son over the last 17 months, or was he perfectly fine with letting Emily’s parents do that? Kobe and Emily were equally irresponsible in having unprotected sex. He comes to the US and his plan for providing for himself and his family is that Emily’s father should take him into his business?  Why should Emily’s father just take Kobe into his business at this point? Maybe the business simply doesn’t create enough revenue to provide comfortably for two families and Emily’s father would have to share his income with Kobe. Bringing Kobe into the business will not automatically double the revenue, so whatever income that business provides for Emily’s parents would have to be split…. Also, like many of us, Emily’s father is probably not convinced that the relationship between Emily and Kobe is going to last. I don’t blame him that he isn’t willing to make Kobe a partner under those circumstances. Emily’s father probably spent decades building up his business and isn’t willing to jeopardize it until he is assured that Kobe and Emily stay together.

[Baltimore Betty]

5 minutes ago, Cini said:

Kobe is a civil engineer

Is his name Kobe Costanza and did he work at Vandelay Industries?

I always wonder if these nitwits have health insurance and who pays for it.

[Doublemint]

Interesting talk about old-fashioned weddings.   In an Italian family in the 50's there were "football" weddings.   The couple married in church and then the reception was in a "hall" where the food consisted of hero sandwiches (footballs).   Followed by cookies brought around by the happy couple.  Of course a cake, band and yes, jordan almonds in a net with a little fake wedding ring on top.      There were always "Society weddings" usually held in hotels, or on the grounds of someone's "estate".   This is what couples did in NY/NJ back in the day.   Down South they usually married in church and had wedding cake and a toast for a reception.   Just some thoughts....

[Baltimore Betty]

It's funny, I went to a wedding yesterday, the bride did an amazing job within her budget and it was a big wedding with catering, etc...the guests were there because we all love the couple, it would have been wonderful if it was just a cake and champagne event, these fiances seem to think they are entitled to the fairy tale but they fail to realize it's not about spending big on a day it is the quality of the relationship the couple has with each other...go to a beach or a barn and have a wedding but none of that will matter if your relationship sucks.

[Breedom]

2 hours ago, anoninrva said:

but his utter dismissal of grooming his future son-in-law to work with him in his business struck me as pretty obnoxious and condescending, if not possibly borderline racist.  Kobe has already run a successful business in Cameroon, and seems pretty sharp to me.  It was pretty depressing when he realized that his yearly income savings would be lucky to stretch a month in America,

I forgot dad's business, but he should stop acting all high and mighty as well as acting like Kobe couldn't someday take over. How does he know that? Does Mr. High and Mighty just assume that Kobe isn't up to the job? Why? He should stop assuming and give someone who is marrying into the family a chance to prove themselves. What a pathetic and insulting thing to say. As far as the $4K that Kobe brought with him to support his family, he genuinely thought that would last a year or two. He probably scrimped and saved (I haven't seen anyone else doing this) and was so proud that he saved that. I felt bad for him when Mr. H&M said that was basically nothing.

Emily having to put herself out there and ask for money. I know she doesn't want "help" - she wants the full money wad to be given to her for the wedding. Has she saved anything from her nanny job? She doesn't have any expenses. I feel so bad for Kobe, this won't end well for him. It can't with Emily being Emily. Kobe is super sweet but life with Emily would be torturous.

1 hour ago, jabRI said:

Yve and Mohammed are the worst.

Egypt Tim's "blouse" was cute. Ha-ha.

[Baltimore Betty]

So John's "Pahty," was awkward. 

Did Patrick and John install a Vivint bell on their house? Seems like Thighs would want to not only want to know where Patrick is every minute but also who is coming and going from the house.

[Baltimore Betty]

Next week we see Emily has bought herself a fake diamond ring and is trying on wedding dresses that will allow her to whip out a boob and breastfeed during the ceremony and reception.

Kobe has $4000 but told Emily he had $2000, either way I thought when Dad heard he had any amount of money he would have asked why he has not offered to buy groceries or diapers because I certainly would have.

[Mrs. Hanson]

13 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

So John's "Pahty," was awkward. 

Did Patrick and John install a Vivint bell on their house? Seems like Thighs would want to not only want to know where Patrick is every minute but also who is coming and going from the house.

Did Patrick say "those girls are ugly" or was that Thais?  Either way that was rude.

19 minutes ago, Breedom said:

Kobe is super sweet but life with Emily would be torturous.

That whole family has a very weird vibe.  Like a really unhealthy vibe, emotionally.

[Cini]

38 minutes ago, Breedom said:

I forgot dad's business, but he should stop acting all high and mighty as well as acting like Kobe couldn't someday take over. How does he know that? Does Mr. High and Mighty just assume that Kobe isn't up to the job? Why? He should stop assuming and give someone who is marrying into the family a chance to prove themselves. What a pathetic and insulting thing to say. As far as the $4K that Kobe brought with him to support his family, he genuinely thought that would last a year or two. He probably scrimped and saved (I haven't seen anyone else doing this) and was so proud that he saved that. I felt bad for him when Mr. H&M said that was basically nothing.

Emily’s father is an architect and owns his own firm. There is no way he can just take Kobe into his company. Kobe has only the equivalent of a high school degree and did not go to college. Even if he were a civil engineer in Cameroon (which I highly doubt), his qualification would not transfer to to the USA. How is Kobe going to take over an architect firm without being an actual, US-accredited architect? This is no different than Bini taking over his father-in-laws cardiology practice.  I have started, grown and successfully sold three businesses in the US and the idea of taking on a partner and somehow both partners now make a living is naive.  Emily’s father has a business that provides a seemingly comfortable living for him and his family. How is taking Kobe into that business creating enough revenue to now provide income for two families instead of one? That only works if the new partner brings something to the table: investment in the form of skills and/or money that enable the business to expand and grow. Kobe has neither money, nor qualifications that would make the architect firm grow so it can provide for two partners/owners instead of one. 

Edited June 13, 2022 by Cini

[bichonblitz]

2 hours ago, jabRI said:

Yve and Mohammed are the worst.  How could they have talked for 2 years and not figure out the basics like, 'I'm an independent American woman, I will never convert or be subject to the ways of Islam'.  And she was suppportive of him finding a place in the local Muslim community.  

I blame Yve 100% for the miscommunication in this relationship. Mo has been perfectly clear before coming here what he wanted, what he expected. He thought she was on board. He didn't lie about anything. She chose to ignore his lifestyle because the dick was good. Now that he's on her turf she plays it different. If I hear "I don't want to lose myself" one more time.......GTFO and cut him loose. He will be much happier back in Egypt. Yve may be 47 but acts like she 17.  

[StatisticalOutlier]

10 minutes ago, Cini said:

Emily’s father is an architect and owns his own firm. There is no way he can just take Kobe into his company.

You'd think Emily would know this, yet the way she was describing it to Kobe it was as if her dad had a sporting goods store and Kobe could start working there and eventually learn the business enough to take over.

I looked at previous posts and saw mention of Emily's tongue, but nobody else is hearing Madeline Kahn every time she opens her mouth?

[OFDgal]

On 6/11/2022 at 2:48 AM, JeanJean said:

I thought the exact same thing!!!!

Me too.  That also made me think they borrowed the horses for the scene of Kobe shoveling shit.  As others have noted, that was a huge pile of crap that looked like it had been there for a while.  It's probably been there since they really had horses.

[Mrs. Hanson]

Just now, StatisticalOutlier said:

I looked at previous posts and saw mention of Emily's tongue, but nobody else is hearing Madeline Kahn every time she opens her mouth?

I am going to ignore the fact that you mentioned the late great Madeline Kahn with ShitShow Emily with the forked tongue and lisp.

[OFDgal]

On 6/11/2022 at 12:22 PM, magemaud said:

I also wondered how the box suddenly appeared at the table and also noticed that it was wrapped in what I call “Movie Style” so it could be opened several times without tearing the paper and re-wrapping between “takes.” 

Production shenanigans again! 

I think he took it out of a backpack.

[Mr. Miner]

Question? Is Kobe really going through with this marriage to such an udderly repulsive human?

I feel the same way about Shaeeda.

Edited June 13, 2022 by Mr. Miner

[Pepper Mostly]

1 hour ago, Doublemint said:

Interesting talk about old-fashioned weddings.   In an Italian family in the 50's there were "football" weddings.   The couple married in church and then the reception was in a "hall" where the food consisted of hero sandwiches (footballs).   Followed by cookies brought around by the happy couple.  Of course a cake, band and yes, jordan almonds in a net with a little fake wedding ring on top.      There were always "Society weddings" usually held in hotels, or on the grounds of someone's "estate".   This is what couples did in NY/NJ back in the day.   Down South they usually married in church and had wedding cake and a toast for a reception.   Just some thoughts....

And there weren't speeches! The best man made a short toast so you could drink the glass of warm Cold Duck that was already sitting on the table! 

We should probably take this over to Small Talk.....

[Welshman in Ca]

21 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

I blame Yve 100% for the miscommunication in this relationship. Mo has been perfectly clear before coming here what he wanted, what he expected. He thought she was on board. He didn't lie about anything. She chose to ignore his lifestyle because the dick was good. Now that he's on her turf she plays it different. If I hear "I don't want to lose myself" one more time.......GTFO and cut him loose. He will be much happier back in Egypt. Yve may be 47 but acts like she 17.  

The fact that he said you saw my life and what I do daily for two years before I came here tells me that she is 100% to blame for the "miscommunication". Her reply of "but that's not real real life we were on vacation" tells its own story, hard to believe she is 47 and not 7 after that comment.

[greekmom]

3 hours ago, jabRI said:

I don't understand how Kobe was a 'civil engineer' with no education beyond high school? Unless he meant like a land surveyor? I don't understand how people come to this country with no clue what it will take to support yourself. You have internet access,  check the local job market and see what the requirements are.  I did that when moving out of state, back in the day when the only 'job market' information was newspaper ads.  Yeah, aging myself, but just saying if I could do it then, no excuse not to do it.

Yve and Mohammed are the worst.  How could they have talked for 2 years and not figure out the basics like, 'I'm an independent American woman, I will never convert or be subject to the ways of Islam'.  And she was suppportive of him finding a place in the local Muslim community.  

I don't understand why Kobe doesnt look into home and commercial building inspections.  If he was some sort of apprentice in civil engineering (let's be honest - he would have a copy of his degree if he was an actual engineer) or a land surveyor, he could get into home inspections and commercial building inspections.  He may need a year of education but it would be a good investment.

I also do not understand why daddy didn't sit Emily AND Kobe together and provide them a list of the expenses he is picking up the tab for them. It might give them perspective on how much they would need on a monthly bases.  Lastly, Emily said she had a job as a nanny. How much is she kicking in?

Yve and Mohammed are just both stupid. Either it's production providing us with a storyline or they are just plain old stupid. I am thinking a bit of column A and a bit of column B.

2 hours ago, Welshman in Ca said:

Exactly what I said, no way he is getting that idea in his head himself.

Darling Emily provided him with the idea he can take over. Issue is that Daddy would never suspect his precious Emily would do that.

2 hours ago, Shauna said:

I wanted him to say:  we're already paying for the three of you for everything:  rent, car insurance, cell phone, diapers, wipes, food and you don't even shovel the shit in the horse stalls and you want me to pay for a wedding, too?  The answer to that is no. 

One thing I did with my teens when they started asking for stuff is I sat them down with Monopoly money. I gave them 1 months worth of an income (before taxes).  Then I started taking away for taxes, rent, utilities, insurance, cell phone, etc.  It really opened their eyes that in the end, you are not left with much.  Maybe Daddy should do that with Emily and Kobe. 

1 hour ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Next week we see Emily has bought herself a fake diamond ring and is trying on wedding dresses that will allow her to whip out a boob and breastfeed during the ceremony and reception.

Thanks @Baltimore Betty , I got a visual as soon as i read that - LOL.  If TLC luvs us, they would make it happen for shits and giggles.

But buying the fake ring should show Mummy and Daddy that Emily isn't ready for marriage. If she was serious about a commitment with Kobe and making a life for their child, she would be more practical. 

Almost forgot:  Regarding Jibjab and his music career.  He and the band could tour areas that have a major Serb population in the US and provide music (for a fee) for their festivals interlooping their own music with traditional Serbian music.  The problem is that they don't want to really work but want to be discovered via online.  

Edited June 13, 2022 by greekmom
almost forgot about jibjab and mimosa

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

53 minutes ago, Mr. Miner said:

...such an udderly repulsive human?

I see what you did there. 😜

1 hour ago, Cini said:

Emily’s father is an architect and owns his own firm. There is no way he can just take Kobe into his company. Kobe has only the equivalent of a high school degree and did not go to college. Even if he were a civil engineer in Cameroon...

It was more than that. IMHO, Emily's dad's TH segment had a real air of "Feh! Like I would ever let someone like *HIM* into my precious business!"

2 hours ago, Doublemint said:

Interesting talk about old-fashioned weddings.   In an Italian family in the 50's there were "football" weddings...

2 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

I went to a wedding in 1981, the reception was at the now burned down Decathlon Club and boy.....those parents made it RAIN.  The priest came and had a little wine and showed off his smooth dance moves!

11 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

A modest wedding here is easily in the $25-40,000 range... It is a huge industry and the couples also want multiple showers with high end gifts and expensive wedding presents. 

The modern American bridal industry has done a wonderful job of brainwashing multiple generations into believing a super-expensive, over-the-top wedding is the norm, and an actual affordable low-key wedding is an embarrassment reserved only for those lesser people who can't afford something better.

(Disclosure: My wife and I were married in Vegas by a Gene Simmons impersonator, with my adult daughter and some of our friends present. Total cost: $650. We took the thousand$ that we could have spent on a more ornate wedding and spent it on a two-week honeymoon cruise through the Panama Canal instead.)

Edited June 13, 2022 by Sir RaiderDuck OMS

[gingerella]

2 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

G could Google wedding venues to see what things cost because if Kara isn't in to spending $1000 for a laptop then he should know 10 grand for a venue would be a hard no.

If only G had a laptop...yanno...to research his dream wedding options!

Also, I too felt that Father Emily was being very condescending and dismissive, but OTOH, I agree that Emily probably told him he could work for her father and take over the business one day. I don't think he came up with that on his own. That said, $4000 IS a huge amount if money in Cameroon but why didn't he Google what the cost of living is in the US? These people are just dumb and lazy, all if them. Guillermo whinging wistfully about his Ken doll dream wedding, Kobe and Emily thinking he will take over her dad's business, Yve not understanding what she will be expected to change as a Muslim wife of an Egyptian boy-man, Me-Only demanding her Barbie Beach dream wedding...None of these people has a fucking dime to spend on this shit BUT there never seems to be a conversation about finances before the K-1 Visa is requested.

ETA: I still don't understand how many of these people aren't deported after showing their colors on national & international TV. OG Mo, Molly's DR creep, Miona, I could go on and on with the list but ultimately what do these people bring to a new country? Absolutely nothing, that's what. 

Edited June 13, 2022 by gingerella

[bichonblitz]

2 hours ago, Doublemint said:

In an Italian family in the 50's there were "football" weddings.   The couple married in church and then the reception was in a "hall" where the food consisted of hero sandwiches (footballs). 

My Italian parents were married in the 50's. Never heard of football weddings. The cookies and the almonds, yes, but hero's for the food absolutely not. Sit down dinners were the norm where we came from. I guess it depends on your own family and where you come from.   

55 minutes ago, Welshman in Ca said:

Her reply of "but that's not real real life we were on vacation" tells its own story,

She saw Egypt up close and personal. Four times! They were not on vacation. This was his homeland. She knew the culture, the dress and the food of their everyday lives and the typical husband/wife relationships there. her excuses of how Mo has changed since coming to the US are laughable. Can not stand her!!

Edited June 13, 2022 by bichonblitz

[1011101010001]

1 hour ago, Welshman in Ca said:

The fact that he said you saw my life and what I do daily for two years before I came here tells me that she is 100% to blame for the "miscommunication". Her reply of "but that's not real real life we were on vacation" tells its own story, hard to believe she is 47 and not 7 after that comment.

She thought vacation was more conservative than regular life would be lol?

[AR Traveler]

Kara/Guillermo: I'm not a fan of outdoor weddings, but they seemed to be in a nice park during their conversation.  Why didn't she think of that?  

As far as my wedding went, it was in church, then we walked across the hall for the reception.  My brother in law, who is a restaurant manager, and the "church ladies" did the food and the reception room decor for about 100 people.  I hired some music student friends to play a string quartet during dinner.  I bought my dress at a thrift shop.  Kroger did flowers and the cake.   I believe I did M&M's for the favors.   My "bouquet" was actually a fan I bought in China for about $2 their money, then I wound a ribbon in my color through it.  Total cost: $1600, and with time we see areas we could have  just cut, such as the wedding video we watched exactly once and the wedding album I have no idea where it went.  

No 23 year old man in existence is dreaming of an old farmhouse for their wedding.  They're thinking "Just tell me where to get my tux and what time to show up".  For all their oohing and ashing, I didn't like it :D.

Yve/Mohammed: How do you visit someone's country four times (!) and not get any idea of what he might expect?  I don't care for Mohammed, but it seems he was very clear; I think Yve just hoped he would assimilate into her very different lifestyle.  These two needed a boatload of serious conversations way before deciding to apply for the visa.

Emily/Kobe: The "what is your plan" talk should have been with Emily, and should have been had way back before China or wherever and some time around Bad Choice Man #1.  Who paid for her gallivanting around China?  She should have been on her own already, but that ship sailed.  

Someone upthread made a good point; we're sympathetic to Kobe and like him so much only in contrast to Emily.  Did he send as much as a dime to her from Cameroon to help out during a year and a half?  As someone else pointed out, it's not like he couldn't figure out some plan and how to make it happen before he came.  I hate to say it, but when someone makes Andrei look good, that's a red flag.  And Andrei has grown on me over time with his willingness to learn and work.  Kobe still has to prove himself to me, so I understand where the dad is coming from a bit.

Bile/Shaeeda: No, Shaeeda, you're not going to get the kids to call you "Mom".  For many stepfamilies, first names are fine.  You may never have that relationship with either of them, and you can't force it.

Bile comes from the school of "He who talks over the other and gets loudest, wins".  How does she claim to love him?  At times, she doesn't even seem to like him.

Patrick/Thais: I could go the rest of my life without ever seeing PDA between those two again.  

[Shauna]

2 hours ago, OFDgal said:

I think he took it out of a backpack.

This.

[Baltimore Betty]

15 minutes ago, AR Traveler said:

Patrick/Thais: I could go the rest of my life without ever seeing PDA between those two again.  

They were actually licking each others tongues!!! Repulsive to watch on TV I cannot imagine how it would be in person...maybe this is their way of grossing John out so much he voluntarily moves out of the house.

Not to get to off topic but it has been my experience that men who are bad kissers are not good in other areas, (don't judge me for doing the research, lol), so if we are seeing that much sloppy tongue how sloppy is the other stuff.  I said sloppy not floppy, tee hee.

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

20 minutes ago, AR Traveler said:

Bile/Shaeeda: No, Shaeeda, you're not going to get the kids to call you "Mom".  For many stepfamilies, first names are fine.  You may never have that relationship with either of them, and you can't force it.

Bile comes from the school of "He who talks over the other and gets loudest, wins".  How does she claim to love him?

Shaeeda mentioned something about how stepparents are not referred to by their first names in her country, which is great except she's in the US now, where this practice is universally accepted.

Bilal's most tiring personality issue is his complete refusal to admit he's wrong about anything. Nothing is EVER his fault and there's no attempt to meet anyone halfway, even for the sake of getting along. He's obviously a deeply insecure person who overcompensates with bluster, faux arrogance and being a control freak.

[magemaud]

4 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

On 6/11/2022 at 6:16 PM, MrBuhBye said:

That’s a lot more than a kiss.

Maybe it was a penis kiss?

I cannot believe I just wrote that.

Mr. Floppy? 

[gingerella]

This Kobe working for Father Emily really is bothering me (I need to get a fucking hobby, right?!). I think under the circumstances, Father Emily could have sat them both down together and said, "Well Kobe, the thing is, to work as a civil engineer or an architect you need 4 years of university and the degree, then you need x years apprenticing or whatever before you can get a license to practice. So, is that what you really want to do? Because if so, you need to research what that schooling will cost and figure out how you will bring in money to help support your family while also going to school." Followed by this, "Emily, you have no idea what it means to be responsible for yourself and it's high time you learned. Babysitting is NOT a career. We need to know what YOU will be doing to get a full time job ASAP to support YOUR family while waiting for Kobe's green card and while he is finding his footing about what he will do for a job once his card comes through. Your mother and I will allow you to live here for the next 12 months so that you can save money, we will provide you with a place to live and food. But anything related to cars, gas, insurance, baby needs, etc. will be covered by you going forward. We'll give you 3 months to get prepared for that and then you're taking over the following costs...And as far as a wedding goes, you have x budget and nothing more."  Personally I'd give them like $1k and tell them to make it work AND I'd send Mother Emily with her to make sure she doesn't sign any contracts for anything over budget.

That is the convo that needs to happen. I don't think it's realistic to expect Kobe to be able to get a decent job right now, but couldn't Father Emily find something menial at his architect firm for Kobe to do? Like help with office management or I don't know what. Clean up after hours. I know the optics don't look good, but it would be a job. It would also put someone local out of work so there's that too. I just don't see Salinas being viable for these two chucklefucks. But she definitely needs to get her kid off the teat and get a fucking full time job.

[magemaud]

3 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Is his name Kobe Costanza and did he work at Vandelay Industries?

and he's also an architect and a marine biologist! 

[magemaud]

4 hours ago, Cini said:

He comes to the US and his plan for providing for himself and his family is that Emily’s father should take him into his business?

If that ugly brown house is any indication of his architecture talent, I sure as hell wouldn't hire him. 

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

1 minute ago, magemaud said:

If that ugly brown house is any indication of his architecture talent, I sure as hell wouldn't hire him. 

I was just thinking the same thing and why only 1 bathroom (isn't that what Emily said like Ep1?)

[Baltimore Betty]

Kobe's description of what an architect or civil engineer does not sound like he knows what either really does and what kind of education one would need.  He said, "You know, design stuff and decide how pretty it should be," or something like that.  Maybe Father Emily can help Kobe write up a resume so it will be ready when his work permit comes thru.

[magemaud]

57 minutes ago, AR Traveler said:

Bile/Shaeeda: No, Shaeeda, you're not going to get the kids to call you "Mom".  For many stepfamilies, first names are fine.  You may never have that relationship with either of them, and you can't force it.

Why can't they come up with a cute nickname like "Shy-Shy." 

58 minutes ago, AR Traveler said:

Patrick/Thais: I could go the rest of my life without ever seeing PDA between those two again.  

They also did that tongue thing when she met him at the airport. I remember him actually saying, "Do you want the tongue?" and proceeded to slobber all over each other. UGH. 

BTW, I don't mean to brag but I'm an accredited "Domestic Engineer." 

[Hellohappylife]

The sad thing about most people these days & especially Young people, they don’t want the huge expensive wedding because it’s their “dream”… they just want to show off & one up their “friends” I’ve been to many weddings & for the most part the bride & groom were apart for most of the event, going around socializing. 

When I got married at 24 in 2016 My husband & I planned our ceremony quietly, & told no one until a month before the date. We left our home in Wisconsin, flew to Hawaii,had a beach ceremony with just us 2, had some beautiful photo’s taken & spent the next 2 weeks hanging out in Hawaii, while everyone back home was freezing.  

All we wanted was to be married, we weren’t going to spend a year thinking about what napkins look good, or what flowers to decorate with. Plus the money saved made for a kickass honeymoon, with great memories & We now visit hawaii Yearly…. we’ll not since Covid but soon. 

Seems like we never hear these people on the show say they just want to be married, it’s always drama over someone not getting their “dream” 

[magemaud]

44 minutes ago, Sir RaiderDuck OMS said:

Bilal's most tiring personality issue is his complete refusal to admit he's wrong about anything. Nothing is EVER his fault and there's no attempt to meet anyone halfway, even for the sake of getting along.

I was ready to reach through my TV and smack him the time Shaeeda was explaining her feelings to him and he gave her a dismissive, “That’s how you feel? Interesting...” 

[greekmom]

1 hour ago, AR Traveler said:

Bile/Shaeeda: No, Shaeeda, you're not going to get the kids to call you "Mom".  For many stepfamilies, first names are fine.  

They could call her Auntie?!

[seacliffsal]

I felt sorry for Kobe when he stated that he had brought $4,000 with him from Camaroon and Emily's dad shot that down-Kobe looked crestfallen as he really did think it was quite a bit of money.  According to the World Bank, the average annual income in Camaroon is $1500, so being able to save $4,000 really was impressive.  Oh, but I had to roll my eyes when Kobe was asked what he intended to do and he started with being a model again.  No.  And, like others, I believe Emily told him he could take over her dad's business.  But what made me yell back at the t.v. (yes, I understand they can't hear me) was when parents Emily said to her and to Kobe that Emily did not know what real life is and how to pay for it as I yelled "and just whose fault is that?!?"

Jibri.  Just no.  Trying to prove how much he loves Moana to the point that he'll fight (well, attempt his version of fighting) anyone who speaks against her.  And why do we have to listen to every single person on this show who claims they are a singer/rapper/international star?  My fast-forward button got such a work out during this episode what with untalented musicians/singers, boring cooking demonstration, various outings during which absolutely nothing happened, etc.

I have consistently sided with Mohammed and this episode was no different.  Yve knew him for 2 years, visited 4 times, and yet she claims she had no idea about his expectations.  I believe him when he says that not only did he tell her his expectations but she also saw/experienced his daily life.  If one doesn't agree with someone else's lifestyle and beliefs then (now this might sound completely off the wall) don't marry that person.  I think Yve thought she could change his mind or just ignore his beliefs once he was in the U.S.  Oh, and I also think he was perturbed that she did not come home when she said she would because then he would be responsible for putting her special needs son to bed.  He is not the babysitter which I think she believes he should happily be as she brought him to the U.S.  Yve is creating a narrative for the viewers that she would not be true to herself if she changed, but I think she led him on allowing him to believe that she would adapt to his clear expectations.

Edited June 13, 2022 by seacliffsal
typos, typos, typos

[anoninrva]

3 minutes ago, seacliffsal said:

I have consistently sided with Mohammed and this episode was no different.  Yve knew him for 2 years, visited 4 times, and yet she claims she had no idea about his expectations.  I believe him when he says that not only did he tell her his expectations but she also saw/experienced his daily life.  If one doesn't agree with someone else's lifestyle and beliefs then (now this might sound completely off the wall) don't marry that person.  I think Yve thought she could change his mind or just ignore his beliefs once he was in the U.S.  Oh, and I also think he was perturbed that she did not come home when she said she would because then he would be responsible for putting her special needs son to bed.  He is not the babysitter which I think she believes he should happily be as she brought him to the U.S.  Yve is creating a narrative for the viewers that she would not be true to herself if she changed, but I think she led him on allowing him to believe that she would adapt to his clear expectations.

You raise an interesting point here.  Hanging out with the girls can't be a regular thing for her, unless the bio-dad is taking care of her son then?

[1011101010001]

1 hour ago, magemaud said:

Mr. Floppy? 

You know often steroids cause impotence, just saying.

[1011101010001]

1 hour ago, gingerella said:

This Kobe working for Father Emily really is bothering me (I need to get a fucking hobby, right?!). I think under the circumstances, Father Emily could have sat them both down together and said, "Well Kobe, the thing is, to work as a civil engineer or an architect you need 4 years of university and the degree, then you need x years apprenticing or whatever before you can get a license to practice. So, is that what you really want to do? Because if so, you need to research what that schooling will cost and figure out how you will bring in money to help support your family while also going to school." Followed by this, "Emily, you have no idea what it means to be responsible for yourself and it's high time you learned. Babysitting is NOT a career. We need to know what YOU will be doing to get a full time job ASAP to support YOUR family while waiting for Kobe's green card and while he is finding his footing about what he will do for a job once his card comes through. Your mother and I will allow you to live here for the next 12 months so that you can save money, we will provide you with a place to live and food. But anything related to cars, gas, insurance, baby needs, etc. will be covered by you going forward. We'll give you 3 months to get prepared for that and then you're taking over the following costs...And as far as a wedding goes, you have x budget and nothing more."  Personally I'd give them like $1k and tell them to make it work AND I'd send Mother Emily with her to make sure she doesn't sign any contracts for anything over budget.

That is the convo that needs to happen. I don't think it's realistic to expect Kobe to be able to get a decent job right now, but couldn't Father Emily find something menial at his architect firm for Kobe to do? Like help with office management or I don't know what. Clean up after hours. I know the optics don't look good, but it would be a job. It would also put someone local out of work so there's that too. I just don't see Salinas being viable for these two chucklefucks. But she definitely needs to get her kid off the teat and get a fucking full time job.

He could start with washing dishes at the restaurant they ate at their first night.  Dude has just high school, which is basically unskilled labor.  He won’t be drawing up any blueprints any time soon.