MAFS Social Media, Spoilers & Speculation

[julyjen]

8 hours ago, Gobears said:

How many episodes are left until the finale? Also, does anyone have tweets from Nick's friends that Sonia said disparage her? That seems like another strike against them still being together.

I am also curious to see what his friends were saying about her. It's a low blow if they were mean and saying horrible things about her.

[psychoticstate]

18 hours ago, Evil Queen said:

How is that the case though? They show him opening it in his place like its the first time reading it and then he opens it up in the bar for his buddies.  There is bs somewhere there and I wouldn't be surprised if its on Derek's end either. It is obvious that the letters though were given to them because the envelopes were not stamped or addressed like you would mailing one but either way it went Derek would look pathetic because he was dwelling on it either at the bar with his buddies or at home or both. Yet in my eyes he has been pathetic before this letter junk anyway. The whole wearing a ring from a week old wedding, acting as if everyone should feel so horrible for him and pouting like a little kid on it all but not once has he said what he could have done to fix it or that he wishes he hadn't done whatever it was he did to ruin things. I don't feel bad for him at all. He needs to man up and quit the pity party over this. 

Eh, I can give Derek a pass here because if he was hanging out with friends, shooting pool and the producers decided they needed to film something with Derek talking about the letter, the producers are going to whip out the letter and set the scene up.  It felt very much to me like that's what happened.  It didn't feel natural at all.  And I don't see Derek or any man carrying a letter around with him to just whip out in the midst of playing pool or whatever.  It would have made more sense to have him bring it out at home if he had a friend or friends over but this is MAFS. . . 

I don't know, maybe the producers wanted him to continue wearing the ring.  Maybe he was upholding his end of the contract.  No idea.  If these scenes were filmed at the same time as Sonia and NIck's and Lily and Tom's, it's been a month.  I do think it's interesting that Rachel said that Derek clearly isn't ready to let go.  If that's legitimate and true, and not being spewed out in order to create DRAMUH, that could explain why he hasn't taken off his ring. 

[julyjen]

Lilly posted a photo on Instagram from her trip to Chicago and not only does she have her ring on (obviously) but she has a new addition on the same finger. I get the feeling her and Tom have made it work but I'm a hopenness romantic 

[ctbabe]

2 hours ago, julyjen said:

Lilly posted a photo on Instagram from her trip to Chicago and not only does she have her ring on (obviously) but she has a new addition on the same finger. I get the feeling her and Tom have made it work but I'm a hopenness romantic 

Based on the first preview, someone proposed with a princess cut diamond ring. The lady had a tattoo like Lillian so I believe it. They are still together. 

[Kiss my mutt]

On September 28, 2016 at 6:01 PM, ctbabe said:

BTW the producers brought the letter to Derek. He didn't take it to the bar

Who is heater? Lol

[Nikkerpotomous]

Anyone else think the producers have been putting bugs of false hope in Derek's ear to keep things rolling?

[Evil Queen]

9 hours ago, psychoticstate said:

Eh, I can give Derek a pass here because if he was hanging out with friends, shooting pool and the producers decided they needed to film something with Derek talking about the letter, the producers are going to whip out the letter and set the scene up.  It felt very much to me like that's what happened.  It didn't feel natural at all.  And I don't see Derek or any man carrying a letter around with him to just whip out in the midst of playing pool or whatever.  It would have made more sense to have him bring it out at home if he had a friend or friends over but this is MAFS. . . 

I don't know, maybe the producers wanted him to continue wearing the ring.  Maybe he was upholding his end of the contract.  No idea.  If these scenes were filmed at the same time as Sonia and NIck's and Lily and Tom's, it's been a month.  I do think it's interesting that Rachel said that Derek clearly isn't ready to let go.  If that's legitimate and true, and not being spewed out in order to create DRAMUH, that could explain why he hasn't taken off his ring. 

I wouldn't be surprised if he was told to whip it out for his friends but I can also see someone like him doing it on his own too. He is one of those kind of guys that wants to have all the pity he can get from anyone and everyone. He won't take responsibility for how his relationships work out but then runs to all that will listen about how the girl was so horrible and did this or that...with this he has a letter now thanks to Pepper thinking they should do such a thing. 

Rachel is so stupid IMO. She is the one that was telling Sonia one minute how she saw a fire between her and Nick (aka pushing Sonia to believe something that wasn't there) and now she is all its ok you don't have to move back in with him. Which no shit she doesn't have to. Plus she sent them to that tantric crazy lady. Now she is acting like oh Derek you still have your ring on you poor thing and how he must not be ready to let go to his one week marriage (if that). The guy is clearly into getting whatever attention he can from how he is acting about his one week marriage ending. I don't think he is broken up over it at all. They do have to finish whatever with their contracts but I think Derek figured why not play up his part and see how much sympathy he can get. I wouldn't be surprised if he whipped it out to girls in the bar to have them go "awww poor guy". 

1 hour ago, Nikkerpotomous said:

Anyone else think the producers have been putting bugs of false hope in Derek's ear to keep things rolling?

I don't think they are but they are making them finish out the contract and stretching what they can from them. Now I can bet those "experts" and producers might be in both their ears trying to get them to work it out so they do not even up with a failed couple. I think one article that was posted here said that they were trying to talk Heather out of ending it like she wanted. I am glad she stuck to her guns and wouldn't budge for them. If they are still trying to push things I hope she keeps sticking to her decision. 

[holly4755]

shoot me now, there are three more shows???? First the three(!!!!) couples have to learn about trust, then In laws on mother's day and finally decision day. Draaaaaaaaaging it out, are they. I will be sick if Heather is dragged to Derek's mother's house. enough is enough. please give up on the third couple, it is so over. The second couple is not looking too good either. No wonder we keep seeing the same scenes over and over. they have to really stretch it out. 

[ctbabe]

8 hours ago, Evil Queen said:

wouldn't be surprised if he was told to whip it out for his friends but I can also see someone like him doing it on his own too. He is one of those kind of guys that wants to have all the pity he can get from anyone and everyone. He won't take responsibility for how his relationships work out but then runs to all that will listen about how the girl was so horrible and did this or that...with this he has a letter now thanks to Pepper thinking they should do such a thing. 

He wasn't told to whip it out, the producer handed it to him. Based on your someone like him comment, I am assuming you know him more than the 5mins shown every episode. I thought I heard him take responsibility this episode. He said he was too impatient.. I don't know what other responsibilities he is also meant to take.. 

[psychoticstate]

3 hours ago, ctbabe said:

He wasn't told to whip it out, the producer handed it to him. Based on your someone like him comment, I am assuming you know him more than the 5mins shown every episode. I thought I heard him take responsibility this episode. He said he was too impatient.. I don't know what other responsibilities he is also meant to take.. 

Good point.  Even for those who are shown more than 5 minutes, it's hard to say with absolute certainty what's going on or even how they might be off camera and in normal day to day life.  MAFS shows us what narrative they want us to see.  

Edited September 30, 2016 by psychoticstate
my fingers got ahead of my brain

[Paddywagon]

Of course we don't "know" these people and can only base our snarky opinions off what we've been shown, but that's the fun of it.

I'd like it if Derek would stop blaming Heather for everything.  He doesn't ever say he played any part in the breakup.  It's all because Heather did this or Heather did that or Heather didn't do this or that.  He's so busy criticizing her he doesn't take any responsibility for his part.

Maybe he could admit he overreacted about the surfing instructor.  Seriously, they had cameras all over and if there was any flirting I'm pretty sure they would've shown something that explosive!!! Haha

Or he could take responsibility for picking a fight because she walked out of the cave rather than asking her about it.  Especially since they'd just had a nice conversation.

He could acknowledge that maybe he's not that self-aware of his habits.  Like, he's not really an occasional toker.  He could admit that maybe getting high before breakfast isn't a good idea with your new wife.  He could admit he's not the neat and tidy person he claims to be (based on his apartment).

Maybe he could've talked to her about not wanting to ride next to him on the bike ride...when it happened.  He said he knew there was a problem but his MO seems to be to sit back and seethe about something he doesn't like then pick a fight with her about it.  I haven't heard him take responsibility for having obvious communication issues.

He doesn't even acknowledge he's said mean things to her.

He keeps talking about working on himself but in the same breath he's back to criticizing Heather.  He never mentions specifics as to what he's working on so IMO there couldn't be much depth to his self-reflection.

Heather messed up too but repeatedly admits to things she could've done better.  She's able to mention Derek's good qualities.  She's owned up to her shortcomings.  I keep waiting for Derek to take responsibility for any of the negative things we've been shown but he hasn't.  His idea is to tell Heather to "Just Leave" during the counseling session.

After hearing what Heather said this last episode, something bad went down and Derek got rejected.  Obviously Heather can't say anything so I think he's just playing it up to the cameras for sympathy and to save his ego.  

That boy's got a lot of growing up to do before he can be considered "wine," lol!  He knows all the right words for the cameras but I haven't heard him take any responsibility for the fail.  I'm sure someone out there wants a fine man like him but it ain't me or Heather!

[Stillhoping]

I still have high hopes for Tom and Lilly. I have been a fan from the start. I realizesome think they are boring or yoo much PDA but I find them much more real than most all the couples from all seasons.

The way they act with their families...the way they joke around..Lilly gave Tom a great birthay...he cooked dinner for her. Much nicer than fake couples sniping.

I do think they just got lucky...hit it off physically immediately....and yeah that is vital I think. Then they are having fun and seem pretty compatable.

Seems in the end these are really extended blind dates...and while maybe most blind dates dont work there ARE couples who proudly say they were fixed up and clicked

I do remember the ring....and I saw preview Tom kinda upset cause Lilly too busy to write her VOWs....maybe they will have a vow renewal?,

I still feel the producers have had to set up and magnify the problems the may have had...the pearls...the bus...the dirty feet. Haha...and so forth.

At least when they have their tiffs they are respectful and seem to end with a kiss. Maybe 3 nice couples would be the end of the show? Hopefully these two make it...then lets see what crazies are in Chicago haha

 

 

 

 

[Evil Queen]

1 hour ago, Paddywagon said:

Of course we don't "know" these people and can only base our snarky opinions off what we've been shown, but that's the fun of it.

I'd like it if Derek would stop blaming Heather for everything.  He doesn't ever say he played any part in the breakup.  It's all because Heather did this or Heather did that or Heather didn't do this or that.  He's so busy criticizing her he doesn't take any responsibility for his part.

Maybe he could admit he overreacted about the surfing instructor.  Seriously, they had cameras all over and if there was any flirting I'm pretty sure they would've shown something that explosive!!! Haha

Or he could take responsibility for picking a fight because she walked out of the cave rather than asking her about it.  Especially since they'd just had a nice conversation.

He could acknowledge that maybe he's not that self-aware of his habits.  Like, he's not really an occasional toker.  He could admit that maybe getting high before breakfast isn't a good idea with your new wife.  He could admit he's not the neat and tidy person he claims to be (based on his apartment).

Maybe he could've talked to her about not wanting to ride next to him on the bike ride...when it happened.  He said he knew there was a problem but his MO seems to be to sit back and seethe about something he doesn't like then pick a fight with her about it.  I haven't heard him take responsibility for having obvious communication issues.

He doesn't even acknowledge he's said mean things to her.

He keeps talking about working on himself but in the same breath he's back to criticizing Heather.  He never mentions specifics as to what he's working on so IMO there couldn't be much depth to his self-reflection.

Heather messed up too but repeatedly admits to things she could've done better.  She's able to mention Derek's good qualities.  She's owned up to her shortcomings.  I keep waiting for Derek to take responsibility for any of the negative things we've been shown but he hasn't.  His idea is to tell Heather to "Just Leave" during the counseling session.

After hearing what Heather said this last episode, something bad went down and Derek got rejected.  Obviously Heather can't say anything so I think he's just playing it up to the cameras for sympathy and to save his ego.  

That boy's got a lot of growing up to do before he can be considered "wine," lol!  He knows all the right words for the cameras but I haven't heard him take any responsibility for the fail.  I'm sure someone out there wants a fine man like him but it ain't me or Heather!

You said it perfectly!!! He has yet to take any responsibility at all for anything he did. He has not said once how he could change and learn from this. He just talks around it all. Then goes back to blaming Heather for everything. His mom even looked like she wasn't surprised this happened. His friends, as well, didn't seem to surprised either. Which maybe he told them before the cameras were on them all but from how he talked before about his relationships all ending for the same reasons, I can bet they weren't surprised. 

[stuckin60s]

one good thing about all of this.  They are watching their own behaviors.  Maybe they can learn something???

[Nowhere]

13 hours ago, Paddywagon said:

Of course we don't "know" these people and can only base our snarky opinions off what we've been shown, but that's the fun of it.

I'd like it if Derek would stop blaming Heather for everything.  He doesn't ever say he played any part in the breakup.  It's all because Heather did this or Heather did that or Heather didn't do this or that.  He's so busy criticizing her he doesn't take any responsibility for his part.

Maybe he could admit he overreacted about the surfing instructor.  Seriously, they had cameras all over and if there was any flirting I'm pretty sure they would've shown something that explosive!!! Haha

Or he could take responsibility for picking a fight because she walked out of the cave rather than asking her about it.  Especially since they'd just had a nice conversation.

He could acknowledge that maybe he's not that self-aware of his habits.  Like, he's not really an occasional toker.  He could admit that maybe getting high before breakfast isn't a good idea with your new wife.  He could admit he's not the neat and tidy person he claims to be (based on his apartment).

Maybe he could've talked to her about not wanting to ride next to him on the bike ride...when it happened.  He said he knew there was a problem but his MO seems to be to sit back and seethe about something he doesn't like then pick a fight with her about it.  I haven't heard him take responsibility for having obvious communication issues.

He doesn't even acknowledge he's said mean things to her.

He keeps talking about working on himself but in the same breath he's back to criticizing Heather.  He never mentions specifics as to what he's working on so IMO there couldn't be much depth to his self-reflection.

Heather messed up too but repeatedly admits to things she could've done better.  She's able to mention Derek's good qualities.  She's owned up to her shortcomings.  I keep waiting for Derek to take responsibility for any of the negative things we've been shown but he hasn't.  His idea is to tell Heather to "Just Leave" during the counseling session.

After hearing what Heather said this last episode, something bad went down and Derek got rejected.  Obviously Heather can't say anything so I think he's just playing it up to the cameras for sympathy and to save his ego.  

That boy's got a lot of growing up to do before he can be considered "wine," lol!  He knows all the right words for the cameras but I haven't heard him take any responsibility for the fail.  I'm sure someone out there wants a fine man like him but it ain't me or Heather!

You lost me at "fine man" lol

[Kira53]

On September 27, 2016 at 10:39 PM, Kareem said:

Glad I watched tonight's 15 minutes with the biggest teeth on the planet.  I liked seeing that Quintin, whom I liked best during the matchmaking, found someone.  WTG

This is a fascinating development of the "experiment".  I'm very interested in how this relationship develops.  

I wonder if it would have worked out if they were married at first sight rather than developing a long distance relationship.  Their situation (living in different states) is totally opposite of the show which is intense total emergence with legal commitment to the relationship.  This might work out better than marriage at first sight.

[holly4755]

OK this Derek/Sonia stuff is multiplying, this is definitely a different day. and they run into Sam from last season?

Quote

Sam Role ‏@Sam_MAFS  Oct 1

Omg the party keeps expanding! @sonia_mafs @derek_mafs @FYI #MAFSFam

 

[Gobears]

I don't think Derek and Sonia are dating. Derek posted a picture on Instagram of him and Nick the same night with the caption "my bro".

[Enero]

I think these meet ups are likely PR for the show, and are thus staged.  They could all be gathering to take a few pictures then post them on Instagram so that the audience will get excited and speculate about whose hanging out with whom etc.  I'm betting that once the show is over these folks will probably never hang out together again, except MAYBE Lily and Sonia. I think they genuinely became friends during this process. 

[Evil Queen]

21 minutes ago, Enero said:

I think these meet ups are likely PR for the show, and are thus staged.  They could all be gathering to take a few pictures then post them on Instagram so that the audience will get excited and speculate about whose hanging out with whom etc.  I'm betting that once the show is over these folks will probably never hang out together again, except MAYBE Lily and Sonia. I think they genuinely became friends during this process. 

Agree. And eeewww who the heck would want to hang out with Sam. Sorry but she is a miserable person and will just bring you misery and nothing more. I wouldn't be surprised if that was for that site she supposedly is now "writing" for. Such a crock that stuff is IMO. I don't see how what was posted can be taken as Sonia and Derek are flirting or anything else either. I am sure a few from this become friends of some sort after the fact but I think for the most part a lot of it is PR crap. I am not even sure if Lily and Sonia would be friends. I just know that I do agree that this stuff is mostly done to try to get those on SM to wonder about things and just talk about the show.

[julyjen]

From the looks of things they all have been hanging out for the past 2 days.  And also lily and Tom seem to be cozy and there are small hints that they are still together.  Especially in a video where she is hiding behind pillows on the boat and Tom passes by and gently touches her leg. 

Maybe there will be a success story this year

[1992austenlover]

I don't know where to post this but I guess I'll post it here. It's an update on Sam from Jamie's blog.

https://jamieotis.com/2016/10/married-first-sights-sam-role-now/

 

14 hours ago, julyjen said:

From the looks of things they all have been hanging out for the past 2 days.  And also lily and Tom seem to be cozy and there are small hints that they are still together.  Especially in a video where she is hiding behind pillows on the boat and Tom passes by and gently touches her leg. 

Maybe there will be a success story this year

I definitely believe that Tom and Lily are still together. I just really can't picture them spending a whole day together on a boat if they are secretly in the process of getting a divorce. I also think that the leg touching was very telling...

But of course, I've been wrong before so what do I know? lol ;) 

[ctbabe]

I wonder why Heather won't hang out with the group and not just Sonia and/Lilly. I don't think I would believe the work excuse again.. 

I wonder if she is avoiding Derek.. 

[qtpye]

I don't think the show was a good experience for Heather and she probably just wants to move on with her life.  She probably just did not bond the rest of the people because of this.

[Evil Queen]

From the sounds of it, they weren't just hanging out like a typical friends getting together to do something but more so it was for Jamie's *gag* site. It seems most of it at this point is just for the show. Time would tell if any of them end up friends at all down the line or not. I think a lot of it is done to try to throw viewers off that go on SM to find out things about them. 

Which btw, why is it an excuse if Heather is actually working? Considering her job I can imagine its not exactly something that she can work around for these people. Besides it was something on Jamie's site of all things so its not like some like People magazine or whatever. If it was because of Derek I wouldn't blame her one bit either on that. I wouldn't want to be around him either. Reading how Jamie rights like she is in love with Sam and acting like Sam was some great wonderful person and questioning how Neil must feel or think about her dating someone....you can tell how much of a joke that whole thing was. Sam was a horrible person and I doubt she has changed at all. I saw no point in wondering if Neil knew or cared or how he felt...as if he was going to be jealous and want her ass back after having to go to therapy thanks to her and this show? I now know never again to click a link going to Jamie's site again too. Good luck to the guy with Sam...he will need lots of it. 

[holly4755]

funny, but the other day I went to sonia's twitter and there were pictures of heather with her. She looked nice and calm with a smile on her face. 

[gonecrackers]

50 minutes ago, Evil Queen said:

Reading how Jamie rights like she is in love with Sam and acting like Sam was some great wonderful person and questioning how Neil must feel or think about her dating someone....you can tell how much of a joke that whole thing was. Sam was a horrible person and I doubt she has changed at all. I saw no point in wondering if Neil knew or cared or how he felt...as if he was going to be jealous and want her ass back after having to go to therapy thanks to her and this show? I now know never again to click a link going to Jamie's site again too. Good luck to the guy with Sam...he will need lots of it. 

I could barely get through skimming that blog entry as I found it so off putting. Writing that Sam was deemed some kind of 'witch' because she was not immediately finding Neil attractive, rather than due to how nasty Sam was to him, is quite insulting toward viewers. I did not like Sam. I can totally understand someone not being immediately attracted to a 'stranger', however, her behavior toward him from the get go had to have been downright humiliating for him. Once she had successfully alienated him emotionally she then proceeded to become needy for his attention & acceptance, & when he could not get past being treated like total crap on national TV in front of everyone he knows to continue the marriage she had cared so little about, she also had the nerve to tell the world on SM that Neil is unforgiving.

Maybe Neil's reaction is relief that Sam may finally leave him alone. Or, maybe he just doesn't give a rip... why should he?

No, Jamie, no.... get your facts straight next time.

I do think the MAFS socializing is arranged at least to some extent - they really work the SM on this show.

Edited October 4, 2016 by gonecrackers
totally messed something up & hopefully fixed it

[ctbabe]

3 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

do think the MAFS socializing is arranged at least to some extent - they really work the SM on this show.

I am thinking maybe the show purchased the tickets but they were not responsible for the entertainment. Sonia hosting a party, meeting up with Jaime and Tom hosting them on a boat wasn't a producer or show driven thing. 

 

6 hours ago, qtpye said:

I don't think the show was a good experience for Heather and she probably just wants to move on with her life.  She probably just did not bond the rest of the people because of this.

I am thinking Neil had a worse experience than Heather did and was still able to remain friends with everyone. I just think it shows the kind of person she is. Despite Derek's habits and lashing out, I don't think he is a bad person at all. I believe he would be a very loyal friend. There is a reason why everyone on the show is close to him, they definitely must see what we don't since they are insiders.

Also to people saying he is playing the victim. I don't get that. After the 'long selection' process and preparing of one's mind to get married on a reality show, it would be devastating to be dumped on tv after 10 days because of one's bad habit, without given the chance to grow and change. Instead of going offcamera to mend, he is thrown on camera and constantly asked how he feels. It must be difficult, i empathize with him. He is human. 

I also read comments abt him not taking ownership of his behavior. If after reading the post episode's interviews, watching the show and following him on SM, you still don't think he blames himself for the demise of the marriage, I have no comments. I think he blames Heather for giving up too quickly. It's like you sign up for a 6weeks job, do you quit  after 10days because you have a 'terrible' coworker or manager? Nope. You express out your concerns, manage the situation and exit after 6weeks. Just my thought 

[gonecrackers]

5 hours ago, ctbabe said:

I am thinking maybe the show purchased the tickets but they were not responsible for the entertainment. Sonia hosting a party, meeting up with Jaime and Tom hosting them on a boat wasn't a producer or show driven thing. 

That's why I thought it was 'to some extent', because there are several MAFS folks who, if they get together, it's not in anyone's face on SM.  The new crew will be seen the most since I'm pretty sure they have to do some publicity for the show, then socializing or not outside of that is their own choice. But we'll see them a lot on SM, whether producer/show driven or not, & regardless of whether they are just posting for themselves or not the viewers are watching their SM so it's still all good for the show.

[gonecrackers]

6 hours ago, ctbabe said:

I am thinking Neil had a worse experience than Heather did and was still able to remain friends with everyone. I just think it shows the kind of person she is. Despite Derek's habits and lashing out, I don't think he is a bad person at all. I believe he would be a very loyal friend. There is a reason why everyone on the show is close to him, they definitely must see what we don't since they are insiders.

Also to people saying he is playing the victim. I don't get that. After the 'long selection' process and preparing of one's mind to get married on a reality show, it would be devastating to be dumped on tv after 10 days because of one's bad habit, without given the chance to grow and change. Instead of going offcamera to mend, he is thrown on camera and constantly asked how he feels. It must be difficult, i empathize with him. He is human. 

I also read comments abt him not taking ownership of his behavior. If after reading the post episode's interviews, watching the show and following him on SM, you still don't think he blames himself for the demise of the marriage, I have no comments. I think he blames Heather for giving up too quickly. It's like you sign up for a 6weeks job, do you quit  after 10days because you have a 'terrible' coworker or manager? Nope. You express out your concerns, manage the situation and exit after 6weeks. Just my thought 

I do think that Heather's schedule as a flight attendant would conflict with a lot of the get togethers, etc.. However, that also made me wonder why she signed up originally, & how she was going to work her busy flight schedule around nurturing a brand new marriage on TV with a stranger (sorry had to say 'stranger'). That would take time & effort. Her schedule may even conflict with finding someone on her own, so maybe she thought the show would be able to do it for her. But again, it would take time; any relationship would. But people with busy schedules & who fly a lot do marry successfully, so I guess she'll just figure it out too someday.

I get what you're saying about them as a couple too, giving up etc, but it is a marriage, not a business partner, & things going badly there is more personal. If he did something she found inappropriate or crossing the line then I can completely understand why she wouldn't ride out the 6 weeks. He was lashing out at her on the honeymoon & was nasty reg. her & all women in TH's which is very concerning. I also understand how many people may not like her but she was obviously completely stressed - toxic relationships are stressful. It's hard to deal with someone who doesn't understand boundaries, & it could be emotionally unsafe as well. I think she did the right thing getting out of it before anymore damage was done between both of them.

Edited October 4, 2016 by gonecrackers

[ctbabe]

3 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I get what you're saying about them as a couple too, giving up etc, but it is a marriage, not a business partner, & things going badly there is more personal. If he did something she found inappropriate or crossing the line then I can completely understand why she wouldn't ride out the 6 weeks. He was lashing out at her on the honeymoon & was nasty reg. her & all women in TH's which is very concerning. I also understand how many people may not like her but she was obviously completely stressed - toxic relationships are stressful. It's hard to deal with someone who doesn't understand boundaries, & it could be emotionally unsafe as well. I think she did the right thing getting out of it before anymore damage was done between both of them.

I honestly don't believe he did anything inappropriate. I think she asked for no intimacy until they knew each other better and he accepted that. I don't think he tried to force her or 'someone' would have leaked the info as they leaked the rest. She also wouldn't continue saying he is a great guy in unfiltered and TH, if he had done something nasty.

I understand his lashing out being an issue. I actually don't think he said the milk age comment until he was interviewed in his apartment after the demise of the marriage. The producers just copied and pasted it to the most impactful spot. I believe everyone has a negative.. if after giving feedback and the person keeps up the bad attitude then walking away is ok. I believe he could have toned down the lashing out, if he was given the feedback. They definitely were both stressed so I get her needing space for a few days but walking away is where I have the problem. 

Edited October 4, 2016 by ctbabe

[nlkm9]

certain things you have to walk away from.......easy to be judgmental seeing it on tv. I think the marijuana (and those stupid backward hats, haha) ended it for her. I said all along he got super nasty and whiny because he wanted sex and wasnt getting it--and then he stopped smoking and he got even nastier. I think they both got a bad draw.....maybe he would have been a good match with Sam?? 

[Neurochick]

So Sonia re-tweeted this just now: 

[biakbiak]

Jaime better watch out, I think Sonia might be coming for her job!

[Jellybeans]

Sonia is more platable than Jamie.

[gonecrackers]

25 minutes ago, Jellybeans said:

Sonia is more platable than Jamie.

True, but Sonia's speech is very irritating (in my opinion of course).

[nlkm9]

10 minutes ago, gonecrackers said:

True, but Sonia's speech is very irritating (in my opinion of course).

I have a friend here who has that exact speech pattern and I totally agree lol.

I hope Neil doesnt grow that whole crazy beard again!!

[Jellybeans]

1 hour ago, gonecrackers said:

True, but Sonia's speech is very irritating (in my opinion of course).

I am deaf so I wouldn't know lol.

[Gobears]

Is Sonia's speech pattern some sort of Hialeah accent or is it just her? Anyone here from South Florida?

[gonecrackers]

Many times I've felt I needed subtitles for both Sonia & Nick; I just often have trouble understanding them. And when I can understand Sonia, it's a bit 'fingernails on the blackboard-ish' to me. If I were her teacher I'd probably say "Are you asking me a question, or trying to tell me something?" And to Nick, "Please take the marbles out of your mouth when you're speaking."

Edited October 5, 2016 by gonecrackers
re-write

[Waterlilly]

Florida is such a melting pot. There are so many accents and speech patterns. I am from Clearwater and spent the past twenty-five years in northern Florida (south Georgia). Now I live on what we call Nature's Coast, people tell me I have a North Carolina accent, lol.  Lots of mid-westerners, New Yorkers, New Englanders, Spanish, etc.

[Evil Queen]

6 hours ago, nlkm9 said:

certain things you have to walk away from.......easy to be judgmental seeing it on tv. I think the marijuana (and those stupid backward hats, haha) ended it for her. I said all along he got super nasty and whiny because he wanted sex and wasnt getting it--and then he stopped smoking and he got even nastier. I think they both got a bad draw.....maybe he would have been a good match with Sam?? 

Agree with this. There is so many things we never saw with them for some reason. I get not seeing or hearing about the pot issue since its illegal but there is more than just that and his whiny, nasty attitude he got. And as for him and Sam, I doubt it would have been a good match there either. She is to much of a narcissistic bitch and wouldn't like him whiny back to her over her putting him down. All they would have in common is pot smoking. Which doesn't equal good match either. LOL

That pic posted with Sonia is so a MAFS set up like most of them (if not all) are while the season airs. Which BTW, nothing wrong if Neil grew his beard back IMO. Of course that is coming from someone married to a man with a beard growing out long. LOL

Edited October 5, 2016 by Evil Queen

[Sup wit dat]

Delete

Edited October 5, 2016 by Sup wit dat

[Paddywagon]

11 hours ago, ctbabe said:

I honestly don't believe he did anything inappropriate. I think she asked for no intimacy until they knew each other better and he accepted that. I don't think he tried to force her or 'someone' would have leaked the info as they leaked the rest. She also wouldn't continue saying he is a great guy in unfiltered and TH, if he had done something nasty.

I understand his lashing out being an issue. I actually don't think he said the milk age comment until he was interviewed in his apartment after the demise of the marriage. The producers just copied and pasted it to the most impactful spot. I believe everyone has a negative.. if after giving feedback and the person keeps up the bad attitude then walking away is ok. I believe he could have toned down the lashing out, if he was given the feedback. They definitely were both stressed so I get her needing space for a few days but walking away is where I have the problem. 

So...lashing out, bad attitude, rude comments, bad habits.  I think you summed up 'not marriage material' pretty well, lol.  I guess I don't see it as one person's job to fix another, (especially with the lashing out part), and that's why I don't have a problem with Heather walking away.  As for pictures, I don't recall any of the people on this show being in photographs together once their relationships are over.

I don't really have the desire to see what Derek's up to on SM but it sounds pretty similar to Sam last season.  They made asses of themselves on the show then play the "I've changed" sympathy card on SM.  And Sam blamed Neil for leaving while she was 'trying to make it work', Derek blames Heather for leaving while 'he's trying to make it work.'  Same ol' bs, different season.

If they've really changed after seeing themselves on the show, great!  I don't buy it but who knows?  Maybe this show is good for something after all.

[Lion18]

4 hours ago, Gobears said:

Is Sonia's speech pattern some sort of Hialeah accent or is it just her? Anyone here from South Florida?

It's just her. I've been living in south Florida 21 years

pS I still have my New York accent

[gonecrackers]

Won't be able to see this until tomorrow but noticed on Twitter Sonia is trying to get on Ellen - she asked for a retweet to 'get Sonia on Ellen'; sounds like for her non profit. Now helping non profits that are doing good (not commenting on hers as I know nothing about it), is not in itself a bad thing, however,  I still feel they had a deal here, as this 'match' was just too weird. Soooo, go on reality show, get insulted, get tons of sympathy & SM love, (possibly) get on Ellen for exposure... for the non profit. Workin' it, is all I'm saying.

[Lion18]

I can't find it now but someone posted a photo of Neil at Sonia's house party with a dog saying it was Nick's dog. In next week's preview they showed the dogs and it definitely looks like his dog

either they stayed married or they are friends and Nick brings his dog to parties

Edited October 5, 2016 by Lion18
Tried to insert photo

[Snarklepuss]

8 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

True, but Sonia's speech is very irritating (in my opinion of course).

I actually find Jamie's speech more annoying.  She over-enunciates yet talks like she's got her jaw wired shut. Plus the way she says "shtraynger" is the most annoying of all.  IMO, of course!

[Gobears]

Anyone starting to think that Sonia & Nick are this season's Sam & Neil but with the genders reversed? I think he will want to stay together on decision day and she will want a divorce. Either that or they will split after 6 months. 

[Evil Queen]

LOL So Sonia sent Nick text messages telling him to fix himself and how he has a really nasty soul. Not like it isn't the truth. Then with him talking about it he acts like its her fault. He said its the 3rd time she has closed down or walked away. Does he even get why any of these things have happened at all or is he really that stupid? So he is saying his feelings are still pretty similar to what they were before but not as aggressive. Sonia knows he isn't attracted and I think is done. There is no coming back from saying those words to someone at all. If she goes back (which a preview had it look that way) then she is stupid. Nick is just a cold, mean, drunk bitch. 

Derek needs to quiet the damn whiny pity me act. No there does not need to be friendship there at all. Most couples that split up/divorce are never friends after the fact. Sorry but he gets no pity from me. He needs to learn to man up and except responsibility for his part in what went wrong instead of all the not getting why they couldn't have tried more or why they can't be friends now.