Uncle JUICE

I'm with anyone else who thinks "Wait, THREE YEARS this Stepstones nonsense has been going on AND you have two dragons???" Good grief. Why isn't the dragons thing an actual like 'division' of the army? Subject to strategies and asset deployment sort of thing? Instead it seems like "I own a dragon, I ride a dragon, therefore I'm going to just go battle wherever, whenever." I don't understand. If the enemy is hiding in the caves, AND for whatever reason you don't just want to station a dragon at the mouth of the cave and have it blast fiery death down the tunnels (seems easiest to me, but what do I know), couldn't you have dragons stationed above the caves, basically just sitting there waiting to roast any and all who emerge? What exactly are they DOING with the dragons? I'd think basically you'd arrive and the first thing you'd do is burn every ship to the water line. Then burn everyone on the beach. THEN you'd have a dragon patrolling the skies for reinforcements (see: burn to the water line) and a dragon waiting to toast pirates when they inevitably have to emerge. And do it all at night! Honestly that this has taken any longer than a month is puzzling...if there were a master of dragons or the Captain of the Dragonforce or whatever on the small council, maybe these things could be discussed!

She's an Arryn, I forget her first name, I believe she is in the Vale. I think! I'm not trying to look it up and get spoiled.

Rest in power, Rhaegal. It still makes me mad how they did you.

Can someone PLEASE help me understand why every small council meeting doesn't start like this: "First up on the agenda, just to get it out of the way, the list of problems we can solve with one dragon and no pushback. Let's see...small band of pirates making life in the stepstones difficult, yep, that one we can handle. Which dragon in the dragon pit hasn't been out in a while? I think the standard "Descent from above at night, rain fire on the ships first, then incinerate the pirates to a man should do it." Anyone object? No? Moving on, the issue of succession...again."

I know it's too much to ask, but just ONCE can I see something get screwed up badly enough to really be a problem? Besides this piece of shit boat's stabilizers going off line. ANd not "Oops, I bumped into a dolphin but it's not even enough to scuff the hull." I mean fuck, they fake most of this shit anyway right? How much more fun is a show if you can see: Hunt for the saboteur who keeps fucking with the stabilizers...high stakes drama that ends with someone locked in the garbage compartment until the charter's over. Captain Sandy: Didn't put the jet skis in the water??? KEEL HAUL YOUR ASS. Stowaway who tricks the whole crew into thinking the boat is haunted. Hijacking by the primary. Yacht seized under sanction for being owned by a Russian oligarch. I have more but they get less tasteful.

I'm not sure if you've received the latest Maritime Law Journal this quarter, but the world of maritime law is exciting and constantly changing. Sincerely, Chareth Cutestory, ESQ

That male steward... #notmyjosiah

THat picture makes me want to wretch. Not unlike the Velveeta commercial where the old woman rides a lawnmower while holding a martinit glass full of said cheese sludge. Vile. Craig Robinson absolutely should be a huge star by now. He's better than this. So much better than this and sniffing a stranger's Gain washed drawers.

Is there anyone her who does not get MAJOR stranger danger vibes whenever Chance is around those girls? Something about him in an Easter bunny outfit really, really made my skin crawl. I'm surprised he got a pickup truck and not a windowless van. Also, loved him having to have a realish conversation with his future father in law, for the first time, while wearing a bunny suit below the neck. Everyone on this show is an asshole, and the real entertainment is the game I've invented for debate with the wife: if you have to pick ONE, is person X stupid, evil, or gross? You can only pick one.

So, I'm supposed to believe that someone was talking about Roe V. Wade, and all of the nuance in such a discussion, WHILE THEY WERE SMEARING HOT WAX ON THE HAIRS AROUND HER ASSHOLE? What fucking planet is this? WHO on earth would engage in this discussion at that particular moment? And I'm to believe Farah made a persuasive argument from an informed position while propped up on hands and knees with her butt cheeks pried open? Sorry about the double post.

I saw a commercial yesterday where a young woman opens the commercial by proclaiming "I had 8 UTI's in one year." In my best Robin Thede: "GIRL." Please figure out your life. Wash your hands or something. Stop fucking around with boxcar hobos. SOMETHING YOU ARE DOING IS WRONG. Also, not sure I'd want to be the face of serial UTI's. Can you even tell your family you're IN a commercial if that's the commercial? Reminds me of the old "This is the face of erectile dysfunction" ads from the late 90's. I always imagined they never told those guys what the commercial was actually FOR when they were filming it, then they watched it and were all like "MY DICK TOTALLY WORKS! WHAT THE FUCK!" [calls agent] Also the Frank Thomas / Doug Flutie commercial for Eugenix Total T, where they always make sure to mention "And fellas...she'll like it too." I always add "by it, we mean your freshly stiffened dick" or something along those lines, much to my wife's continued dismay. :)

YES. They are all dealing with significantly malformed images of relationships, and are probably given to over-romanticizing based on the incredible surroundings. Much like the 90-Day Other Way folks, as you seem to imply, these people would be better off just saying "You know what, I find crewmember X really attractive, she / he is into me too, so we're probably just going to fuck whenever we can while we're on the boat, and we'll see where it goes from there, Probably nowhere though." The girl on Down Under, for example, can't figure out that it's an absolute shit idea to plan to do a life in a van trip with someone you've known for six weeks or less. Same deal. Just fuck, no one's going to hate you over it, you're young, single, when will it be a better time to have those adventures? Trying to figure out how to marry vacation dick / [impolite vagina name] is a real bad idea.

Exactly what my wife and I both said: WHY DOES HE NEED TO KNOW? I was completely on Team Tash when Douchey Dave went ballistic a couple of episodes ago. COmpletely inappropriate reaction (but isn't that why we watch? These are almost all invariably emotionally damaged people living in close quarters, isn't this shit inevitable?). Now, she absolutely tells him for zero reason at all, and he gets all upset about it again, except SHE's in the wrong. I do not understand why these people cannot land, and quickly, on the solution that "You know, it's probably best for us to just communicate professionally, about work stuff." As far as Storm and Natalya go, I think she's just looking for someone to charm her knickers off, and it seemed to me Storm's not very charming. He's nice, he's probably sort of funny, but dude had no game at all.

Really don't care that we can see the seams on this production-driven stupidity, I guess. Who the fuck goes on a cruise and headlines with "We love Hamilton the play!"? Good grief. God, I wish it were Cats instead.

Missed opportunity to see if the gesture for blowing loads really IS international.

This might be my main problem with the show right now, one episode deep. I'm going to give it time, not for Fett's sake (agree: totally overrated character whose appeal was basically non-canonical for decades, and disagree with @paigow on his clone wars arc, I didn't find it so, but YMMV), but because there are always cool little characters hanging around to discover. Anyway, back to my bolded part there: this can't be another western in space, that lane is taken. This should develop into something closer to Space Sopranos if you want to distinguish your properties. And Obi Wan / Ahsoka better be more classical samurai films.

THIS is the big problem. There are plenty of people in Tunisia 'disrespecting' their parents house in a similar fashion, right now at this very second, biology is biology... they're just not doing it on TV.

It's this one :).

I hear what you're saying, but this has always bugged me. Like is he disrespecting his mom's house if he jerks off in it? Or just because she didn't specifically say "Don't jerk off in my house," it's okay? And when has this ever worked for more than 24 hours, respecting someone's house as some sort of sex inhibitor? So if he goes down on her but doesn't fuck her, is he still disrespecting the house? Sorry guys, but the bad news is if your son or daughter's partner is coming over to your house and is going to sleep there, you can be sure than they're going to disrespect your house. My mom tried this with me when I was eighteen, so my girlfriend and I just went out to my car in the driveway and did it. And of course my mom caught us, to which I said "I'm NOT IN THE HOUSE" and she said "animals." I was kind of a dick as a teenager, I think.

Wasn't at your expense, I'm sorry! That meme is the idiom "right on the nose," in other words, I think you've hit the nail on the head with your "maybe he likes a gummy" theory. My wife and I are absolutely convinced he's stoned as hell when he's watching. I see you're a Welshman, but is there a UK equivalent to this idiom" "Spot on" or "Bang on" perhaps (I get most of my English idioms from Premier League broadcasts, so I don't have a wide array, but my favorite so far is "under the kosh," as well as "all hands to the [defensive / offensive] pump!").

She can take comfort knowing there's still an entire non-TV yacht industry that I'm preeeettttttttttyyyyy sure is totally comfortable with many variations on the offending word, sadly.

Rayna, Rayna, Rayna. Don't make me defend someone for dropping the N word, PLEASE do not make me do it. Too late. As @iMonrey mentioned already, you have accepted TWO apologies for this incident, both to me appear to be sincere, and you TWICE reassured Heather that "it's all good, let's move on and have fun," but any time something starts going sideways, be it your work performance or you getting aced out of a three way with those two guys and having to settle for fucking the one, it somehow becomes the one thing that's really frustrating you and you can't get over. Now, I reiterate, it's NEVER okay for white people to say it, it's just not. I accept it, and as I have admitted, when alone in the car singing along with my music, I'll sing it along, but if someone else is in the car I don't. Maybe that makes me a horrible person, whatever. But don't say "I don't remember the context" or "Context doesn't matter". It does: calling someone "that's my n****" when you're drunk is not the same as being sober and saying "Look at this n*****." Both are wrong, but they aren't the same. Heather has grown on me, but this season is a fucking drag. I'm also done with those two mean girls being mad the one other laundry lady quit, you both forced the issue, I know they didn't fire her but you're still responsible.

Uh, isn't there at least the HINT of bodily danger for Mike when this inevitably goes sour? Her ex got "mucho anos" in prison. That's not three. Mucho anos is at LEAST ten. And she already admitted she's dated some narcos. What's to stop XImena from getting upset, telling her ex, and him leveraging some network either in Colombia or in NY where Mike is from to REALLY put the squeeze on him financially? Some Breaking Bad shit right there. Mike needs to get the fuck out of there, stat.

I just kinda wish they'd let these people be a little more genuine, not feel so histrionic when they're shocked or aghast or "awwwww" every fucking little thing. That's why I like Tim and Veronica, their reactions are understated enough to at least seem genuine. I thought Molly's friend was funnier. Tone Loc seems to be there to make faces and chew on something when he's supposed to be commenting. And absolutely WORD to Robert and Annie, I'm editing my initial list! FINAL ADD I promise: Hey, D+ (terrible name for a streaming service, still better than Peacock don't put the word cock in your name), I might consider $3 a month if I can ONLY watch the raw footage of TIm and Veronica reacting genuinely, because I promise it's the funniest stuff TLC has right now.