Quotes: "Oh dear God!"

[SunShine Gal]

"Let's all go... to a... taco... show... sumpin' and sumpin'... BUTTONS AND BOWS."

[ari333]

"Let's all go and, um..  panty hose, sah-um and sah-um and buttons  and BOOOO-wsss." Priceless.

Hey, Sunshine, what was the one where Frasier was stomping around on the bathroom tiles and singing? The song escapes me.

"Love does enter through the nose!"

[Runningwild]

Hi everyone!  My favorites are Ski Lodge, The Doctor Is Out, and Ham Radio.  "I just can't bewieve one of my guests could be a muppeppuh mupuwuh." "Could you stand back to back?  I'm running out of bullets."

[SunShine Gal]

"I'm meeting my multiple-personality group and it takes forever to make out the name tags."

"Hammer toes."

[ShellyWelly]

Frasier: (in an episode AFTER Lilith and Niles slept together) "It happened.  Take from it what you can and move on."
Niles: "Well, I learned if you kiss her too fast you get an ice cream headache."
Lilith: "You also learned I have twice your upper body strength, so shut your pie hole."

[Athena]

Here be your place to extol your favourite Frasier quotes. I moved some posts from the Small Talk thread to here so we can go wild with the quotations.

 

Frasier: Roger, at Cornell University they have an incredible piece of scientific equipment known as the Tunneling Electron Microscope. Now, this microscope is so powerful that by firing electrons you can actually see images of the atom, the infinitesimally minute building blocks of our universe. Roger, if I were using that microscope right now, I still wouldn't be able to locate my interest in your problem.

[SunShine Gal]

Lillith (in an audible sigh): "My god."

Frasier (taking it the wrong way): "My goddess!"

---------

Frasier just coming back from a trip visiting Frederick and deciding to go to the radio convention.

Frasier: "I've got to go pack."

Niles: "Your bags are already packed."

Frasier: "No, these are my daddy clothes. I need my 'COME to daddy' clothes."

[rubaco]

Athena, I love that quote and I wish my brain were still youthful enough that I could memorize it, because it would come in handy in so many situations! The other quote I wish I always had at the ready is the one Niles that says to the pushy woman who butts in front of him, something about living in a "cozy cocoon of narcissism" and not noticing other people.

OK, I had to cheat and look it up...

Niles: I suppose people like you who glide through life wrapped in a cozy little cocoon of narcissism never notice such things.  But you'd do well to learn this lesson, sister! There's still such a thing as good manners in this world. 

…Unfortunately he goes off the rails at that point because she's so beautiful, LOL. Oh Niles.

[BizBuzz]

Frasier: Roger, at Cornell University they have an incredible piece of scientific equipment known as the Tunneling Electron Microscope. Now, this microscope is so powerful that by firing electrons you can actually see images of the atom, the infinitesimally minute building blocks of our universe. Roger, if I were using that microscope right now, I still wouldn't be able to locate my interest in your problem.

OMG, I just saw this episode last night.  The delivery makes this whole thing hilarious.  Roz got interested and then when she realized it was a joke, her smile was priceless.

[SunShine Gal]

They still ask to see my Yum-Yum.

[MaryHedwig]

Lilith and Fraser are about to crash a headmaster's Thanksgiving to convince him accept Frederick as a student.

Lilith: "How do I look?  I feel like the color has drained from my cheeks."  in Bebe's great deadpan voice.

Daphne has ditched her wedding to join Niles in the Winnebago:

Niles: "Fasten your seat belt."

Daphne: "Fasten your seat belt, Niles."

It is all in the looks.

[SunShine Gal]

Frasier: "Niles... are your pants humming?"

Niles: "...it's my Testicle 2000."

[BizBuzz]

Some of my favorite quotes were when Frasier would use his name in them:

 

"I guess someone wanted to rack up a few more frequent Frasier miles."

[BizBuzz]

I really thought I shared this quote, which gets me every single time, but I can't find it, fortunately, I found a video of it, so even better:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5u80Z8X-kEU

 

"No sooner do I get the closet of my dreams then my husband comes out of it."

[Lily Adler]

Daphne: Flesh is burning dun-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh.

[BizBuzz]

Daphne: Flesh is burning dun-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh.

Literally, LOL

 

Watching Three Dates and a Break Up last night:

 

Frasier: Niles, was that Natalie Spencer I just saw you talking with?

Niles: As a matter of fact it was. I've been admiring her all evening, so I steeled myself and asked her if she might be free next week.

Frasier: And?

Niles: Well, her lips said "no", but her eyes said "read my lips".

[Lily Adler]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jaUy_dlKC0I

[BizBuzz]

That's not gibberish, it's Klingon.  HA!

 

When they were on the ship had me in STITCHES with customs.  How many did he say?  HA!

 

Mother of God!  Forgot that one!

 

Wakey Wakey, Time for Cakey!

 

THAT was a great find Lily, thank you for starting my day off right!

[Lily Adler]

Welcome. =D

 

Also:

 

Frasier: Copernicus called and you ARE NOT the center of the universe!

[DangerousMinds]

"Let's all go and, um..  panty hose, sah-um and sah-um and buttons  and BOOOO-wsss." Priceless.Hey, Sunshine, what was the one where Frasier was stomping around on the bathroom tiles and singing? The song escapes me."Love does enter through the nose!"

It think it went "I'm in the mood for love" STOMP STOMP STOMP.

[Lily Adler]

Niles: Her lips said no, but her eyes said read my lips.

[Athena]

Niles: "Frasier, I need to ask a small favor. I need you to create a distraction while I have a sex change and move to Europe."

[BizBuzz]

Frasier: "How can we possibly use sex to get what we want? Sex *is* what we want!"

[Athena]

Frasier: "I do. I... I like her from a distance. You know, the way you like the sun. Maris is like the sun. Except without the warmth."

[Lily Adler]

Daphne: Dr. Crane are you alright?

 

Niles: I'm fine... just a little hot... and foamy.

 

Martin: You know what must've happened! My Hot'n'Foamy must've exploded.

 

Daphne: He was a detective, ya know.

Edited May 8, 2014 by Lily Adler

[Guest]

 

Frasier:  You look like a skinny Elmer Fudd.

[Lily Adler]

Daphne: Wow. Roz, don't you look smashing.

Eve: What an interesting costume, who are you?

Roz: I'm O. from the "Story of O."

Everyone: Ohhh!

[SunShine Gal]

Daphne: "Roz, do you have a tissue?"

Roz: "If you don't see it, I don't have it."

[Lily Adler]

Frasier: After you, my juicy wench.

Niles: "Juicy wench?" No, not you Maris! Wait, wait!

[shuts phone]

Niles: I hope you're happy, she's run for her water pills!

[BizBuzz]

Martin: I'm a regular Joe, and I like my Joe regular.

[Lily Adler]

Roz: I don't see her, maybe she went back out. Oh wait! I see her coat on a hat rack.

Frasier: Look closer. Is the hat rack moving?

Roz: OH MY GOD!

[Bort]

From the last season episode "Detour" where Frasier and Charlotte ended up having to stay the night at the house of the WEIRDEST people, who had their matriarch in a coffin in the living room whom the husband had an unhealthy and creepy attachment to and they really REALLY didn't want to sleep on the foldout in the same room with a corpse.

Celia Weston's character: "Well, there's momma's bed... But that's in our room."

[SunShine Gal]

"The Barra... cuddaaaaa"

 

"You're not even the SEX I want!"

 

"There'll be NO naps in HELL."

 

"If you aren't this tall... you can't go on this ride."

[BizBuzz]

Frasier: But, well, Faye and I have a, a deeper connection - and to be fair, actually, she was the first to plant her flag on "Terra Frasier."

[Crs97]

"There's something I have to tell you. Dad wanted to, but I won the coin toss." - Niles

"She's making her annual pilgrimage to the holy land." - Niles

"I thought she was going to Dallas to visit her sister." - Martin

"Well, that is her holy land. It's the site of the first Neiman-Marcus." - Niles

[dahling]

Frasier, after discovering Niles in Lilith's hotel room:

 

"Well we three have certainly analyzed the CRAP out of this situation!"

[mansonlamps]

Niles (same episode): I learned when you kiss her you get an ice cream headache.

[SunShine Gal]

Gil: "This is my last little man... oh, who am I kidding!"

[moonb]

Tom: So wait a minute, this Maris guy he kept mentioning...is a woman?

Frasier: Well, um, the jury's still out on that one.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

"Do you have a step-ladder? My pants are caught in the ceiling fan."

 

Niles: "I'm pretty much unflappable."

 

Frasier: "Please, Niles, if you flapped any harder we could run you up the flagpole at dawn."

[stonehaven]

"Last night I had a dream that my baby was taken and the kidnappers sent me muffins in the mail"

[ShellSeeker]

Two of my favorite episodes are Ham Radio and Mamma Mia. Niles was hilarious in that episode:

 

"Frasier, when it comes to girlfriends, you've certainly struck the MOTHERload."

"Yes, oh dear, it looks like these pants may have to be REPRESSED!"

 

I also loved the episode where Roz has to wear a hideous bridesmaid dress, and gets dumped by her boyfriend. Then Frasier comes over to check on her and she opens the door, wearing said hideous dress, crying, with her makeup running all over the place. That whole scene was hilarious.

 

And I've used a Frasier line over the years, but only rarely because the moment has to be exactly right. In the episode where Eddie is depressed:

 

Martin: Maybe we should take him to see a dog psychiatrist. Is that the answer?
Frasier: Only if the question is, 'What is the most asinine thing we could do?'

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Roz: "Niles, why do you have your arm around a floor lamp in this picture?"

 

Niles: "Oh, no, that's Maris in her Easter hat."

[TexasTiffany]

Frasier: "Give a dog an hour you can bill him for 7."

 

Frasier: "No one knows for whom the bell tolls"

:::: ding ::::

Martin: "Did anyone else hear that?"

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Niles: "Perhaps it would be a good idea to look into getting some of Maris' eggs frozen."

 

Frasier: "Oh, I suspect that they're probably only a few degrees shy of that as it is."

[daisydonut]

Niles: Frasier, you're not famous anymore

Frasier weeps uncontrollable.

Martin: Somebody get that monte cristo in here!

[RedZoneTuba]

NILES: And even worse, after I'd left the car off at the body shop, the rental agency didn't have a single luxury car left. They stuck me with some vehicle I believe they call a "hunchback."
FRASIER: No, I think that would be a hatchback, Niles.
NILES: It's painted panic-button red, and has a large rear window that pops open.
FRASIER: Oh, that would be the hatchback.
NILES: Oh. Well, there's a novel idea. Name the car after its most hideous feature.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Frasier: Roz, why is it that whenever we try to have a serious discussion, we always end up talking about your sex life?

 

Roz:: Because I have one.

[BizBuzz]

Whenever I get to Season 11 on Netflix, I have to admit I let most of the episodes just sort of play in the background ... but there are a few choice quotes from that season:

Frasier: I was having the most distressing dream; I was climbing up a volcano, that was spewing ice instead of lava.

Daphne: An ice volcano. I wonder what that could mean.

Frasier checks his messages

Voice on the answering machine: Hello, it's Lilith.

Frasier, Martin and Daphne: Oh, well.

[RedZoneTuba]

They're trying to get Daphne back into the US from Canada since she has no green card and should not have left the country.  A border guard is inspecting the RV after Martin told everyone to keep their answers short because guilty people always talk too much...

GUARD: (To Niles) What was the purpose of your visit to Canada, sir?

[long pause]

NILES: (deadly serious tone) Fun

 

(It was all in DHP's timing and delivery)