Pretty Little Quotes: Two Can Keep a Secret If One Of Them Is Dead.

[Bort]

Gotta have a quote thread...

"You know Spencer, she's a total stress case. A garbanzo bean in the wrong salad bin is enough to make her wig out."

[AmandaPanda]

"I'm about to hang a sign on her - 'Bitch can see!'"

[DigitalCount]

Why not put the speaker and episode numbers as well? Just a suggestion.

[AmandaPanda]

Good idea, DigitalCount.

My quote above is by Aria in 3.02.

[pachis]

Hanna: Please, Jenna cant hear us, shes blind. 2x08

Hanna has the best lines...

[Jack Shaftoe]

Spencer: Who is that? Is that Wren?! (3.11) (it's all in the delivery)

Spencer: Mona is five feet of insidious snark with a side ponytail, and I want to grab it and I want to yank it really, really hard. (2.06).

Hanna: If it needs a tent, it is a circus. (2.10)

Ashley: Maybe we should find someone with a beard who can do that whole turning-water-into-wine thing. (3.06)

Emily: Texas. It's beauty queen capital of America.
Hanna: Well, that could be a good thing. If that's your type.
Emily: It's not.
Hanna: So, you have a type? Okay, just promise me that y'all won't come back with big hair. (1.22)

Mona: Kate Moss would look like a water buffalo in that. (2.10)

Mona: Seriously, I am like the horse-whisperer. (2.10)

Edited April 11, 2014 by Jack Shaftoe

[Bort]

I think my favorite quote is from Spencer, when she was all offended that Aria's mom thought she was having an affair with Ezra. “Unless you’re Aria’s mom, just assume it’s Spencer. You know, sluttin’ it up.”

[scarletregina]

My favorite quote will always be the one that made that made me fall in love with Hanna:

 

"Of course it was a joke. And this is a fork." 1.04

[mercfan3]

"All this testosterone and not a sheep in site." - Allison, from the first Halloween episode. 

[Bort]

Was watching the repeat of the 4B finale before the premiere.

After watching A jump from one rooftop to another, then scrambling up a brick ledge, Hanna to Ali: "That is definitely not your mother."

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Ali: There's no art to this war, Spencer.

Spencer: You've read Sun-Tzu?

 

Hanna: I guess Muddy Chews can count as a protein and gummi bears as a fruit.

 

Hanna: Shhh, she can hear you.

Spencer: She's sleeping.

Hanna: She's Ali.

[fantique]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Season 4

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Aria: I'd still like to graduate.

Spencer: Well, newsflash! Honey, none of us are graduating.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hanna: Are you going to to eat that?

Emily: Yeah. I told you that like 5 seconds ago.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Aria: Hanna, give her your cookie.

Hanna: You give her your cookie! I'm hungry.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Spencer: Wait, Melissa's here? Is she back from London?
Veronica: Oh, yes. And don't expect any souvenirs because all she brought back was attitude. And secrets.

 

Hanna: Is this cheese old?
Ashley: It's Havarti.
Hanna: (gives Ashley a look that clearly says, "I have no idea what that means.") Does it melt?
Ashley: All cheese melts, Hanna.

 

Mike: [Ali]'s tough. I'm kind of surprised she didn't kill the creep with her bare hands.

 

Mike: Why's Mr. Fitz in the hospital?
[Aria gives him a death stare for eavesdropping]
Mike: What? The door's made of wood, not plutonium.

 

Spencer: Is it just me or is this a really weird time to detail your car? Why would you be squeegeeing your backseat if your sister just got back from the dead?

 

Ali: I'm not twerking through town, okay?

 

Toby: If you want, you can call him.
Veronica: Wren? Oh, please. I'd rather stick a knife in the toaster.

 

Spencer: Are you channeling your Filipino grandmother?

 

Emily: Follow [Jason]!
Hanna: No, YOU follow him. I have to change my underwear!

 

Homeless guy: And who are you? Her real estate agent?

 

Aria: It's only a matter of time before [Mona] runs out of whistles and starts handing out balloons that say, "Aria killed Shana!"

 

Aria: Who's the fiddler on my freaking roof?

Edited June 18, 2014 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Aria: A dog who knows where the body was buried? That sounds exactly like A!

 

Hanna: Who hit Alison that night and who killed Mrs. D?

Emily: We're all thinking the same person.

Spencer: Really? Did you start reading minds?

 

Mona: Look at that story [Ali]'s got to tell. All that drama and danger and suspense. Couldn't be more exciting if she made up the whole thing.

 

Spencer: We're not exactly the Hatfields and the McCoys.

Melissa: Nothing so rustic. More like the Borgias and the Medicis. Lot of matricide.

 

Specer: Why did you lie about seeing [Toby] in London when you hadn't?

Melissa: On a practical level, there's no difference between me seeing him and knowing he was there.

 

Spencer: When you sell a house, don't you have to inform the buyer of things like mold and termites and dead bodies?

 

Ezra: She says that I'm her favorite gunshot victim.

 

Jason: Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?

 

Emily: You're going to have a coffee this late?

Hanna: Seven tenths of my body is made up of caffeine. I have to maintain a consistent level.

 

Mona: Shoot. Metaphorically speaking.

 

Aria: That's crazy.

Spencer: Crazy, as you know around here, works on a sliding scale.

[bettername2come]

Spencer: You know, Dad, forget about selling the house. We could just put in a koi pond. Somebody already dug a hole.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Aria: Hanna, you're not spontaneous. You make a Pinterest board before you change your nail polish.

 

Peter: What's the matter? Or should I say what's the matter now?

 

Veronica: Our next door neighbor was found murdered in our backyard. Surreal doesn't even begin to describe this experience.

 

Lucas: Hasn't the universe punished [Alison] enough?

Mona: What we're doing isn't punishment. It's preventative measure.

Lucas: That's semantics.

 

Emily: I started taking extra long showers just to get away from [my mom]. When the hot water runs out, I'm screwed.

 

Spencer: It's better than sitting in the cafeteria.

Aria: Not really. We're still a freak show. Now we're just a freak show in natural light.

Hanna: I feel like we're lobsters in a tank at a restaurant. You know, the ones that you stare at to see which one you want to eat. And then you see the lobster with the chewed off claw and the rubber band.

Spencer: Hanna, we're not lobsters.

 

Spencer: Aria, you need to take a psychological selfie right now. You are letting your paranoia get the better of you.

 

Hanna: This girl in PE asked me if it was true if Ali was fed raw meat.

Spencer: What did you say?

Hanna: Nothing. I just bonked her over the head with a dodge ball.

 

Spencer: They're going to have to wait for the coroner's toxicology results to determine [Ali]'s mom's cause of death.

Hanna: Cause of death? It was murder. DUH.

 

Emily: We know you famly had nothing to do with what happened to Ali's mom, Spence.

Hanna: Of course not. I mean, if they killed her, they wouldn't make a bonehead move like burying her in their own flowerbed.

Aria: Hanna, that's so not helping.

Hanna: Yes it is.

 

Andrew: I just wanted to check in, make sure that-

Spencer: Oh, that I'm not popping pills like breath mints.

Andrew: Well, I wasn't quite going to put it like that.

Spencer: Yeah, well, nobody ever does but people are running out of euphemisms for a lot of things around here.

 

Lucas: Home schooling wasn't really for me. It's kind of a game changer when your mom can ground you and flunk you.

 

Andrew: The guys who built the pyramids got more breaks. Can we take one? A break, I mean. I'd be good with either a bottle of water and a snack or you making out with me.

 

Sidney: I'll eat anything except spray cheese.

 

Mona: You don't get to be some kind of social Switzerland here. If you're not with me, you're against me.

Paige: Mona, I'm just curious. Do you ever wonder when you became the very thing you're afraid of?

 

Aria: What I just said makes me sound like one of those women who gets pregnant and claims they have no idea how and it must have come from the swimming pool.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Hanna: It says we're supposed to be dressed appropriately for the presentation. Business conservative? I'd rather wear vomit.

 

Travis: There's no rule that says you have to walk into school with her tomorrow.

Hanna: It's not written down but it's understood.

 

Ezra: You don't have to live in fear of your cell phone anymore.

 

Toby: If action is character,then who is Alison now?

Spencer: Been reading Fitzgerald?

Toby: I've been re-reading Fitzgerald.

 

Toby: It's okay to close the door on someone if they're toxic.

 

Emily: If [Jenna]'s sad, she could cry in New York.

 

Hanna: We blinded Jenna, we killed her girlfriend, and she's back to punish us for it.

 

Hanna: Last night you thought [Jenna] was staring blind daggers at you!

 

Hanna: This punch is so tasty!

Lucas: It's best consumed rapidly and repeatedly.

 

Hanna: Lucas! You're doing it with her!

 

Paige: Bridget Woo just told me she saw Jenna tonight.

Emily: She's probably drunk.

Sydney: Jenna or Bridget?

Emily & Paige: Bridget.

Paige: She also told me Shana's dead.

Sydney: Who are these people?

 

Alison: You don't scare me, Mona.

Mona: You're not as good of a liar as you used to be.

 

Ezra: Why pie?

Aria: Why not pie?

 

Aria: Jenna's all alone now. She's all alone and she's blaming herself. I just wanted to tell her that she should blame me.

Ezra: You should both be blaming Shana. She was the one that was holding the gun, remember?

[emma675]

Hanna (about Emily and Ali): Are they together now?

Spencer: Have you been drinking again??

Hanna: I just had a sip of beer.

Spencer: eyeroll

[Derenaspoby]

FAVORITE TOBY QUOTES

[To Spencer]: You're never alone... not even for a second.

[To Spencer]: Pretending not to love you was the hardest thing I've ever done.

[To Emily]: Different is good. I like different. This town has too much of the same.

[To Spencer]: What does a world without 'A' look like?

[To Spencer]: I think most people just want to buy into a happy ending.

~I forgot when he said this~: Hey, be careful with that glass beaker... it's made of glass.

[To Hanna]: I've taken naps more exciting than this party, and so have you!

[To Spencer]: I know who you are, and you never have to say you're sorry.

FAVORITE SPENCER QUOTES

-: Aria, you need to take a psychological selfie right now.

-: What did you say? We think your friend is in our friend's grave!?

-: Unless you're Aria's mom, just assume it's Spencer! Ya know... Sluttin' it up!

[To Toby]: Well the house of Hastings isn't exactly my safe place to land.

-: You know what they say about hope... It breeds eternal misery.

[To Andrew]: Oh Andrew! I didn't recognize you with clothes on.

[To Toby]: Please don't let me go.

FAVORITE EZRA QUOTES (idrk for him, because I don't like his character)

[sees Aria]: Holy crap!

Ezra [about her wanting to teach]: Was that true, or were you just hitting on me?

Aria: Did you really play B26, or were you just hitting on ME?

Aria: You still haven't finished that book?

Ezra [laughs]: No one has.

Aria: Sometimes the villain wins.

Ezra: Sometimes.

I was going to do the rest of them, but I was too lazy lol. So just my favorite quotes from Toby, Aria, Spencer, and Ezra instead.

Whoops, never mind. I didn't even do Aria lol.

[mercfan3]

Forgot this one

 

Hanna: I could have killed you!

Caleb: With a pink furry lamp, hanna. 

Edited July 14, 2014 by mercfan3

[bettername2come]

*lamp

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Caleb: The cops in this town should be riding around in clown cars.

 

Spencer: I know that you were just trying to protect me.

Peter: Damn right I've been trying to protect you. I would never take a life to cover up something you did.

Spencer: I didn't do anything!

Peter: Neither did I!

 

Spencer: Aria, I thought you said you were never going to go there again!
Aria: I meant it when I said it.

Spencer: Are you forgetting about what he did to you? What he did to us?

Aria: No, of course not.

Spencer: You couldn't eat or sleep for weeks after you found out about that book.

Aria: Okay, well he took a bullet for us.

Spencer: Yeah, but that doesn't change the fact that he deceived you for years.

 

Hanna: So much for the new normal.

Emily: I knew it was too good to be true.

Spencer: Too good to be true? These last two weeks have been nothing but crap!

 

Emily: Paige named names!

 

Emily: Wrong direction, Hanna. New Jersey isn't on the way to Oklahoma.

 

Veronica: Leaving your dad isn't about one lie. It's about years of them.

(do you hear that, Aria?)

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Hanna: I'm pretty sure Emily's mom is not one of Mona's secret ninjas. Are we supposed to be suspiscious of everyone now?

Ali: It saves time.

 

Hanna: Caleb, what are you doing here?

Caleb: Exit exams.

Hanna: How is reading about monsters going to help you? Shouldn't you be studying?

Caleb: I'll wing it.

Hanna: You can't wing it. It's like all of high school in one test.

Caleb: If they ask who signed the Emancipation Proclamation, I'll say Daniel Day Lewis.

 

Ali: You don't know me at all.

Caleb: That's right. I just know you from what you leave behind, like a tornado.

 

Emily: I think what Hanna means is-

Hanna: No, Hanna knows what Hanna means.

 

Ali: There were times in the dark where I would just think, "What did I do to anyone that was so bad to deserve this?"

 

Emily: [takes a sip from Hanna's glass of vodka] Hanna!

Hanna: What? I had to have something to wash down all that bologna we had with dinner!

 

Spencer: This is not about love. If it were about love then there wouldn't be bodies buried in backyards up and down this street. This is about lies.

[Oholibamah]

Spencer: A Lannister always pays his debts.

Random Nerd: You would like the Lannisters.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Spencer: Toby, you can't just become a policeman!

Toby: Why not? I thought the uniform was a turn on.

Spencer: No, it's not! Is this why you cut your hair?

Toby: Well, you know, since the uniform didn't work.

 

Nurse: Are you here to fingerpaint or speed date the orderlies?

 

Aria: I'll never get back into [Rhonda]'s room.

Spencer: Did they fire you?

Aria: No! I didn't kill her. I just gave her a freaking root beer.

 

Aria: How many stables are near Lewisburg?

Spencer: Uh, Aria, it's called horse country for a reason.

[paulvdb]

Ella: "Aria, you are my fashion guru."

Ali to Jenna about Shauna: "How did you turn her against me?"

Jenna: "I didn't. You did."

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Spencer: What was the plan if [Noel] got caught? "I'm sorry, Mrs. Marin. I just needed to borrow a butcher knife."
Ali: You're a little loud.
Spencer: You're a little crazy!

 

Hanna: Even the doorknob smells like [Ali]!
Spencer: Why were you smelling the doorknob?

 

Spencer: I'm talking about Hanna. She's a mess. And she's been that way ever since you got back.
Caleb: I think you have me confused with Alison.

 

Spencer: Hanna cannot be stumbling around the halls at school looking like she's on a bender in Cancun.
Caleb: Hey, what's wrong with Cancun?

 

Caleb: I have never seen you turn down free food and a chance to dress up. Last year for Cinco de Mayo, we drove ten miles out of town to a gas station just for the free burrito and a mini sombrero.

 

Caleb: You just stay here and watch the chickiest chick flick you can find.

 

Zach: I'm actually kind of busy right now.
Caleb: Yeah, it sounds like you've been busy - being the kind of scumbag who's begging to get his ass kicked.

 

Emily: Couldn't you find somewhere to hide it?
Spencer: And have Noel Kahn breaking into MY bedroom? No thanks!

 

Emily: Is Jenna hiding in your trunk?

 

Noel: You break into my car, steal something from me, and I'm the bad guy?

Edited August 6, 2014 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Spencer: Do we seriously have to remind you that you were never actually kidnapped?

 

Aria; The whole world's going to know that Ali's a big fat liar.

Hanna: And us. Right now we're just as big and fat as she is.

 

Spencer: Thank god the cops are here so we don't have to worry about being imaginary kidnapped.

 

Emily: Spencer's the convincing one.

Aria: Yeah, but you're the hardest to disappoint.

 

Emily: Did you find a place for the...thing you got from you know who?

Spencer: Are you speaking in code now?

 

Spencer: Hanna, are you seriously running away from me? I'm faster than you and I have a car!

 

Aria: The truth doesn't amount to much when it comes from a bunch of liars.

 

Hanna: We both know that Ali brings out the A in you.

 

Ella: Would you wear this?

Aria: Yes, which is why you shouldn't.

 

Alison: You weren't there, Em.

Emily: When? When wasn't I there? When Hanna broke her leg because of A? When I almost died in an elevator because I was trying to find out who killed you? Or when Spencer had to check into Radley because of everything your disappearance put us through?

 

Hanna: Spencer has a plan.

Caleb: A good one?

Hanna: No, it's awful, even for Spencer.

[bettername2come]

Emily: Spencer's the convincing one.

Aria: Yeah, but you're the hardest to disappoint.

 

Spencer: It's about your eyes.

 

Hanna: She's in the driver's seat of my life and I'm supposed to watch her just steer me off a cliff? I'm sick of it!

Caleb: Well then toss her not my friend zucchini.

 

Poor Caleb. First Miranda won't let him drink his damn papaya juice and now this.

Edited August 13, 2014 by bettername2come

[Oholibamah]

It's a shame the producers can't make the plot more cohesive and keep Ezria apart, because the conversation writing on the show is pretty genius most of the time, and the Liars are really good at their characters. I shudder to think how insufferable Aria would be if somebody else played her.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Mona: Everything about the Manhattan Project is fun. It's the place where the Cold War started. And J. Robert Oppenheimer is dreamy.
Mike: I don't think I can put that in my report.

 

Spencer: Do I call you Officer Toby or Cadet Toby? I like cadet. It sounds like you're in space command.

 

Spencer: Caleb will listen to [Toby]. Never underestimate the power of a good bromance.

 

Spencer: It's from Melissa. I'd recognize that anal retentive handwriting anywhere.

 

Hanna: Tanner thinks we killed Bethany Young.

Spencer: What are you talking about?

Hanna: Tanner! She thinks we did it!

Spencer: Did she say this to you?

Hanna: Not in so many words.

Spencer: How many words, Hanna? And in what order?

 

Melissa: There's a point when you go from survivor to predator.

 

Caleb: Who died and made you Oprah?

 

Hanna: If you love someone, you should be able to tell them anything.

Spencer: That's the theory.

 

Emily: [Ali] has an amazing gift for knowing just what a person wants, what they're missing.

[mercfan3]

Toby: So I hear you have trouble sleeping. What's up with that? 

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Mona: Why do you think that I can help you?

Aria: Because you're Mona.

 

Mona: If you believe a lie, it becomes the truth.

 

Mona: No one can know I'm doing this, including your bed buddies.

 

Mona: Just act normal (unspoken: BITCHES!).

 

Aria: Just so you know, [the Montgomerys] are not going to have enough time to judge your baking. They'll be too busy judging you....Well, that's why you were invited!

 

Spencer: I'm sorry, officer. I have a difficult time with authority.

 

Emily: Let's deck the halls and fa la la la la.

Caleb: What is wrong with her?

Hanna: Read her boobs.The girl loves Christmas.

 

Hanna: Code Go! I repeat Code Go!

[Insomnia]

Spencer to Aria: Every time you baby squirrel Ezra, you're taking away his nuts.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Aria: What'd you get for Toby?
Spencer: I'm abstaining from Christmas this year, remember? When you're out on bail for murder it just feels like the right thing to do.

Emily: And he's okay with that?

Spencer: Well, he agreed to not giving presents if I agreed to surprising each other with a gesture.

Hanna: Like the clowns?

Spencer: What clowns?

Hanna: Court jesters. They're clowns, right?

 

Spencer: Hope is a dirty four letter word.

 

Aria: I swear Alison is throwing this party to rub it in our faces. "I ruined your lives and now I'm the belle of the ball."

Spencer: Technically she only ruined my life.

Emily: Ruin one of us, ruin all of us.

Aria: I'd rather dance on dead monkeys than go to Ali's stupid ice ball.

Spencer: Dead monkeys?

 

Aria: Is that a reporter or a cop?

Spencer: Neither. That pen's too nice.

 

Hanna: A keeps souvenirs. right?

Emily: You mean Alison.

Spencer: Different name, same bitch.

 

Hanna: What's wrong?
Caleb: I'm pretty sure that some kid peed on me. And that mean little girl, she keeps calling me dumdum.

 

Hanna: I don't think people change. They just get better at hiding it. But mean girls stay mean.

 

Aria: If this is low key, I am afraid to ask what full on Christmas was like at the Fitzgerald house.

Ezra: Don't ask. It's like, how many ponies can you get?

Aria: Seriously?

Ezra: No.

Aria: Ezra.

Ezra. Well, I got two ponies but I only asked for one.

 

Emily: Why doesn't Jenna come over here and talk to me? Then you don't have to be her eyes AND ears. She can still hear, right?

 

Hanna: If we're the only ones here, why are we whispering?

 

Emily: Guy or girl?

Aria: Guy.

Emily: Are you sure?

Aria: Yes, I'm sure. I definitely got a sense of male butt.

 

Alison: I'm scared, okay? Is that what you wanted to hear?

Mona: It wasn't as gratifying as I thought it was going to be.

 

Mona: Wake up, bitch! It's Christmas!

Edited December 10, 2014 by ElectricBoogaloo

[bettername2come]

Spencer: What clowns?

Hanna: Court jesters. They're clowns, right?

 

My favorite part of this was Hanna smiled after she said it, like it was actually a joke instead of a dumb Hanna moment,

 

Toby's cast: Here lie the broken bones of Toby Cavanaugh.

Edited December 11, 2014 by bettername2come

[Crim]

I cheered at this:

 

Aria: I swear Alison is throwing this party to rub it in our faces. "I ruined your lives and now I'm the belle of the ball."

Spencer: Technically she only ruined my life.

 

Way to call it, Spencer! YES!

[bettername2come]

Toby: I'm not driving all the way back to Rosewood with Low Blood Sugar Spencer. That's worse than No Caffeine Spencer

Spencer: Wow, you're girlfriend sounds awesome.

 

Toby: You're following a lead that came from a bird.

Edited December 15, 2014 by bettername2come

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Spencer: Let's not forget I'm still an alleged murderer.

 

Hanna: [The Grunwald] seems to like us - in a disturbing, creepy kind of way.

 

Emily: If it were easy to prove that Ali's a murderer, wouldn't we have done that already?

 

Mike: Did you look up how to talk to me online or something? I feel like I don't want to talk to you about my dead girlfriend.

 

Grunwald: Gates and walls, dams, barriers. How can you live in such a psychically constipated environment?

Hanna: I eat a lot of fiber.

 

Spencer: Creating false evidence is an ACTUAL crime!

Emily: Spencer, you are being charged with ACTUAL murder.

 

Ali: I guess I remember things differently.

Jason: You always had a knack for that.

 

Caleb: Aria, your sudoku prowess doesn't exactly qualify you to help out with this stuff.

 

Grunwald: I'm not going to ask you how you are. When people say that, they really don't want an honest answer, do they?

 

Emily: For a minute, I thought I would just get on the plane to Atlantic City and fly away but I didn't.

Hanna: I've been to Atlantic City. You made the right choice.

[lion10]

Hanna (talking about Grunwald): She rescued Ali after Mrs. Dilaurentis planted her.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Ali: Have you forgotten what it feels like to be in a cage for something you didn't do? Do you remember how that felt?

Toby: Yes, I do. But I also remember whose words put me in that cage. Do you?

 

Hanna: Holbrook is not Wilden. Holbrook's not that bad of a cop. He's just a really bad kisser.

Aria, Emily, and Spencer: WTF?!

Hanna: It was one kiss, closed mouth.

Spencer: Why did you kiss him?
Hanna: He helped my mom with the whole Wilden deposit thing and he stood up for Travis's dad in court.

Spencer: Okay, what ever happened to a thank you card?

 

Toby: This is about doing the right thing.

Caleb: There is no right thing. There's only by the book or save our ass.

 

Caleb: I can't get hauled away for suspicions of murder - AGAIN.

 

Ali: If I'm as clever as everyone thinks I am, wouldn't I give myself a better alibi than my brother?

 

Ali: If I was A, why would I let this happen to me?

 

Emily: Take an empanada.

Spencer: Uh, no thanks.

Emily: What do you mean, "no thanks"? I made these. Eat one.

Spencer: I just walked in.

Emily: And you're STARVING. EAT IT!

Spencer: Em, there's a hair in this.

Emily: Just eat around it, okay?

 

Johnny: Your mom told my mom that I could rent your guesthouse.

Spencer: Are our moms friends?

Johnny: Kind of. Your mom sued my granny's nursing home for my mom. I'm Johnny Raymond.

Spencer: Spencer Hastings. The sister who hasn't checked out - yet.

Johnny: I'm psyched about the space.

Spencer: I don't think that you really should be. You don't want to live in our backyard.

Johnny: Why?

Spencer: Because someone was buried in it. Will you excuse me?

Edited January 14, 2015 by ElectricBoogaloo

[Crim]

Spencer, as the door opens: "Seriously? I mean, the shelf life on secrets around here has reached an all-time low."

 

"Your friends will see you soon." - that was an awesome, awesome ambiguous message.

[lion10]

Emily:  "If I wanted advice, I'd asked my mother.  We go way back."

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Spencer: I've got some bolt cutters in my car.

Caleb: ...

Spencer: I like to be prepared.

 

Hanna: Baby, you sound really echo-y, like you're in an air duct.

Caleb: That's because I'm inside an air duct.

 

Spencer: Denatured alcohol, antacid tablets, water.

Caleb: Okay, I didn't take chemistry.

 

Caleb: So she's either being pickled or dissolved?

 

Spencer: You're sure you wiped down everything?

Caleb: The only things I touched were the light switch and the air duct cover. I think we're good.

Spencer: What if we left hair, fibers, skin cells?

Caleb: I think you're being paranoid.

Spencer: Possibly if I were being excessively or unreasonably anxious according to Merriam Webster but there's nothing unreasonable or excessive about wanting to keep us all out of jail. I'm being meticulous.

Caleb: Actually you're being a thesaurus but I appreciate your attention to detail.

 

Aria: "Last night took me by surprise. I'm glad I stayed for dessert. Jason." Wait, what? Since when does your mom bake?

 

Toby: For a town where some pretty awful things have happened, today almost nothing happened.

Spencer: Come on, something must have happened.

Toby: Uh, I responded to a total of two calls, an 1126 and a 1091L, so Rosewood is now safe from an abandoned bicycle and an off leash labradoodle.

Edited January 21, 2015 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Tanner: Why would Holbrook help Alison?

Toby: People saw them kissing at the ice ball dance.

Tanner: People? You mean your high school girlfriend?

 

Tanner: You have been a cop for all of six minutes and you have the nerve to investigate your superior. If you want to keep your job, your little research project ends here.

 

Ashley: [Ted]'s a pastor and there are certain responsibilities that go along with marrying him. I'm not sure I'm cut out for that life.

Jason: Yeah, I bet those church socials can be pretty brutal.

 

Aria: This place is huge. We should probably split up.

Emily: I'll take the second floor!

 

Ezra: I think [your Talmadge letter] rang true to [Jackie] for a reason.

Aria: Yeah, because I'm a good writer.

[mac123x]

Tanner: You have been a cop for all of six minutes

 

When she said that I thought to myself "So a character in the story has acknowledged the writers' wibbly-wobbly time line."

[mercfan3]

I think the writers through a lot of inside/fans jokes in episodes. 

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Spencer: That's pretty passive aggressive.

Hanna: And A is aggressive aggressive.

 

Hanna: The police called Caleb. They want to re-interview him about the storage space, asking if he saw anyone there acting suspicious.

Aria: Aside from you?

 

Caleb: We'll burn that bridge when we get to it.

 

Emily: They suspended Holbrook?

Hanna: For inappropriate behavior.

Emily: What kind of inappropriate behavior?

Hanna: Take your pick.

 

Hanna: I don't like wishing games. They just remind you of what you don't have.

Mona: What's the point of breaking your shell if you turn into such a dull omelette?

 

Mona: You would have all the control and nobody would ever know it's you. They wouldn't even know they were being controlled. That would be the best part.

 

Hanna: Mona was always thinking. She just wasn't thinking what we thought she was thinking.

 

Johnny: It's like a perpetual motion machine powered by secrets.

 

Emily: Ali's going on trial for murder and I'm trying to figure out if a girl's flirting with me or not.

Caleb: What answer do you want to hear? Flirting or not flirting?

 

Spencer: Are you going to tell me what this thing does?

Johnny: You're smart. You can figure it out.

Spencer: I don't want to figure it out. I just want to know.

Johnny: Analyze that sentence, Spencer. It's very revealing.

 

Spencer: You're kidding.

Johnny: I never kid. I'm whimsical but I never kid.

 

Bethany: She's a bitch!

Radley doctor: Let's try to find other words.

Bethany: She's an evil bitch!

 

Bethany: You could be the nicest person in the world, She gets them to do whatever she wants. Five minutes with her and you'd drown a bag of kittens if she asked. Two minutes if you're a man.

 

Mike: Why did you follow me out here?

Aria: Why did you visit Alison in jail?

 

Hanna: You don't get to play the victim here. You're the grown up police officer.

Edited February 4, 2015 by ElectricBoogaloo

[hqtextbook]

"That was the straw that broke the chameleon's back"- Hanna

[AlottaShade]

I REALLY think Wren is A and "Even a lie would sound good in that accent" has always stuck in my mind because of that.