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Pretty Little Quotes: Two Can Keep a Secret If One Of Them Is Dead.

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Spencer: No blood, no cookie. I don't make the rules.

Emily: You're just too lazy to get one.


Spencer: In the Hastings family, if you don't excel at something you move on to the next thing.

Jonny: So you've never done something just because you love it?

Spencer: How can you love something if you're bad at it?


Jonny: Catch!

Spencer: Throwing things at people on ladders? Not cool.

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Hanna: She makes you feel the girl in fat camp who got caught eating her toothpaste. What? It was minty.


Nan: You need to learn how to keep a secret in this age of oversharing.

Hanna: I have lots of secrets.

Nan: Anger isn't one of them.


Emily: Do you think it's okay to date a person if some part of you knows it's not going to last forever? I mean, if it's amazing in the moment but ultimately you think it's probably doomed.

Ashley: Are you asking me about me or are you asking me about you?

Emily: Neither. I'm just curious.

Ashley: Emily, people get hurt and disappointed in relationships every day. But no one should jump into one with that intention.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Emily: [Ali]'s locked in a cell because of us.

Aria: No, she's locked in a cell because of karma. Well, and because of us.

Emily: Look, no one's saying she's a saint.

Spencer: Or even a decent human being.

Emily: She's on trial for a murder that she didn't commit. Mona set her up and then was killed herself and now Ali's going down for it. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

Aria: Well she's definitely runner up.


Aria: Let me find Cyrus. Maybe he can lead me to A.

Ali: You've been looking for A for-

Aria: No, we've been trying to find A's henchmen. We thought that A was in a jail cell.


Hanna: I couldn't go back there, not after calling [Ali] a liar and a murderer to her face.

Spencer: She IS a liar.

Emily: Up until yesterday we all thought she was a murderer too.

Hanna: Well you guys didn't make a personal appearance, cut her open, pour salt in the wound, and then exfoliate it.


Spencer: I thought you and dad weren't really talking.

Veronica: We weren't. But when our daughter is making field trips to prison, I figure I owe him a jingle.


Spencer: You called Wren? You hate Wren.

Veronica: Well I'm not holding out for Jonny Raymond's connections to pull through.


Claire: The events calendar - meet and greet, pancake breakfast, orientation. Each one of you is also assigned a fairy godmother to help you walk through it.


Andrew: [All the President's Men] is a thriller about getting messages from a shadowy figure who knows everybody's secrets.


Colin: Apartments are flats. Trucks are lorries. Sweaters are jumpers.


Aria: If we can just talk to [Cyrus] again, maybe he can give us some sort of insight into who contacted him.

Hanna: Why would he tell us now? Because we'll ask nicely?


Hanna: Emily's already popping and locking my way into college.


Nurse: Next time wear pants!


Aria: Cyrus spelled [Varjak] wrong.

Hanna: That's awesome!

Aria: Why is that awesome? It just means he's a bad speller.


Colin: Spencer, just take a moment. You're having a panic attack.

Spencer: No, this is just what it looks like when I pack.


Claire: We can't force you to do anything, only encourage you.


Andrew: That's weird.

(this should be Rosewood's town motto)


Andrew: For such a petite girl, you bring a lot of chaos. It's not that I mind chasing down angry bikers with a baseball bat cause I mean, I don't.

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Rewatching season 2:


Spencer: Control A! Control A!

Hanna: What do you think I'm trying to do?

Spencer: No, hit Ctrl + A! On the keyboard!


Spencer: If only we could harness Mona's sense of entitlement. We could light the eastern seaboard.


Spencer: I wanted him safe, now he's back with Jenna. That's like out of the frying pan and into the volcano.

Edited by bettername2come
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Colin: Spencer, just take a moment. You're having a panic attack.
Spencer: No, this is just what it looks like when I pack.

Hehe! I love this one because when you think about it Spencer at normal does look kinda like a panic attack.
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The writers definitely played this up, what with Ezra's reaction and all. It was meant to be funny/cute, I guess, but it was just one more moment that pulled me out of the show.


Spencer: "That was my first time buying beer legally. This country does have its perks."

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Spencer: Do you have a burner phone?

Caleb: What color?


Hanna: Edith Pilaf.

Aria: Like the rice?


Caleb: I should have put Hanna in a car and taken off when I had the chance.

Spencer: Why didn't you?

Caleb: She would never leave you and Aria and Em. You guys are like a band of Vikings.

Spencer: Well, less pillaging, better hygiene.


Spencer: When this is all over and we're safe and sound, I need to talk about bottling you. Esssence of best boyfriend. We're going to make a fortune.


Emily: If, might, could?


Aria: You want to just give up and go shopping?


Spencer: I'm going to Alison's trial.

Veronica: I forbid it.

Spencer: Forbid? That's a big hefty nineteenth century word.


Rebecca: Objection! Improper, inflammatory, irrelevant!


Spencer: The truth will set you free but first it turns you inside out.


Ashley: What's the point of forgiveness if you don't really know what happened?

Ted: It's about a clean slate.

Ashley: There is no such thing.


Hanna: It's not going to be that bad. Maybe I'll write a book or something. Lots of people write books in prison. Martha Stewart wrote one.

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That's a hanna line if I've ever seen one

Seriously between that line and "You want to just give up and go shopping?", I think the writers need a new ditz since they decided Hanna is a genius.

Edited by superman1204
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I was referring to the the second line, which is a reply to Hanna. Since the writers thought the joke was too good to pass up *eyeroll*, they needed another character to have never heard of Edith Piaf. My point was that Aria was a poor choice in this specific instance.


I took "You want to just give up and go shopping?" as a joke meant to remind Emily that they didn't really have that choice, which worked; it also worked as a meta-joke (though maybe it wasn't intended to be) since it was such a "That's so Aria" line.


Btw, I didn't say this in the episode thread but man, did Emily repeat the "Ali is/we are running out of time" thing a dozen times or what? Writers, I think the viewers are really, really aware of it by now. So are the Liars, and Ali, and everyone's families, and A. Everyone is aware of it, that they are running out of time. Redundancy those lines are.

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Aria: Where has [Leslie} been all this time?

Spencer: It probably took her a while to cross the River Styx.


Aria: Why would she tell you this?

Ella: You'd be surprised what students confide to their favorite teachers. Or maybe you wouldn't.


Caleb: Life doesn't get easier by avoiding things. I guess you didn't learn that up on the horsey estate.


Emily: Closed mouth or open?
Spencer: Drink your sauce.


Rebecca: What happened to [Hanna]?

Alison: She slammed her hand in the dryer.

Rebecca: Really? Is this the first time you girls have done laundry?


Judge: I don't like edible objects thrown in my courtroom.


Tanner: So just to be clear, instead of helping untie your friend, you stopped to take a photo. It's kind of an odd reaction, don't you think?

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Hanna: What the hell was that?

Emily: We just had an accident.

Aria: Yeah, I did. IN MY PANTS.


Veronica: Let's get our facts straight. The "incident" was an abduction.

Peter: But who would want to take the girls?

Veronica: Should we be asking who would or who could?


Intercom voice: Please follow the lighted pathway.

Hanna: We heard you, bitch.


Caleb: I'm one step ahead of you.

[only noteworthy because Caleb is always at least one step ahead of Ezra]


Spencer: What is this place? Do you know where we are?

Mona as Ali: We're in my living room, Spencer. This is my house. Why are you acting like such an imbecile?


Hanna: "Hanna Marin, food and beverage." Bite me.


Spencer: So this is going to be our senior prom? We're decorating with construction paper and tape.

Emily: Maybe that's part of our punishment, to put together the lamest prom ever.


Tanner: You might not know exactly where [the girls] are but you know more than what you're telling me.

Caleb: You're right. I know a lot more than you do.

Peter: Okay, I think it's time to go.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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  • 2 months later...

Hanna: You may be a dude, but you're still a bitch.

Spencer: You guys, in the vault, I was so close to Charles I could feel his breath.

Mona: Was there anything about him that you recognized? A smell?

Emily: She's not Jenna.

Mona: Where do you think we are?

Aria: We don't know how long we were out before we got here.

Hanna: We could be in the Amazon right now.

Spencer: We're in the northern hemisphere. That's the waning moon.

Hanna: I was saying that facetiously.

Mona: Wow, that's an eleven letter word, Hanna.

Mona: You know you're dying when you're not hungry or thirsty anymore. It means your organs are shutting down.

Aria: Mine are definitely working. I'm so thirsty I seriously considered drinking my own pee.

Hanna: I could totally suck on a pee ice cube right now.

Emily: I'd lick sweat off a jock strap.

Hanna: Okay, Emily, you win.

Andrew's Dungeon Siri: Please proceed to Ali's room and prepare for a rival.

Ezra: She's still not moving?

Caleb: No, she's at a dead stop.

Ezra: That's a poor choice of words.

Spencer: I counted the steps to the vault from the prom room.

Aria: Of course you did.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Mona: You know you're dying when you're not hungry or thirsty anymore. It means your organs are shutting down.

Aria: Mine are definitely working. I'm so thirsty I seriously considered drinking my own pee.

Hanna: I could totally suck on a pee ice cube right now.

Emily: I'd lick sweat off a jock strap.

Hanna: Okay, Emily, you win.

Andrew's Dungeon Siri: Please proceed to Ali's room and prepare for a rival.



That urine-centered conversation REALLY grossed me out! They could have TOTALLY done without it if you ask me. 

By the way, I think the voice said "prepare for HER ARRIVAL"... o.O

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I saw a guy on one of those survival shows (Bear Grylls?) squeeze the liquid out of animal poop and then drink it, so Hanna talking about pee ice cubes didn't phase me at all.


I think the voice said "prepare for HER ARRIVAL"... o.O

I just rewatched to double check and Dungeon Siri definitely says, "Please proceed to Ali's room and prepare for arrival."

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Toby: Give me five minutes!


Mr. DiLaurentis: You had no obligation!

Alison: Yes, I did.


Aria: Too early for sarcasm?

Ella: Not where I come from.


Alison: Spencer, he says there's no such person as Charles DiLaurentis in our family.

Spencer: Ali, I'm going to say this as delicately as I can. Your father's a liar.


Alison: What do you think happened? Goblins snuck into the Campbell house and switched babies on them?

Spencer: We both know that there are more conventional ways somebody can end up with more than two parents. That's how you and I got to share a brother.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Ezra: You're safe here. I promise.



Hanna: You're a doctor. Can't you subpoena them?


Jason: You probably heard my dad is trying to decide how many people he can sue at one time. It's the kind of challenge he enjoys.


Alison: Do you have any idea how crazy that sounds?
Hanna: Trust me, we know exactly how crazy it sounds.


Hanna: Tempest in a teabag.


Veronica: Is it true?

Spencer: It's made up of facts. That doesn't make it true.

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Spencer: Aria, we can't just throw away clues!


Spencer: [My mom] probably offered to buy [the school] a planetarium.


Mona: They might still press charges against me for being dead when I wasn't.
Hanna: That's not a crime. That's just being stupid.


Lesli: You think I actually wanted perjury on my resume?

Hanna: I don't know what that means but I really don't like your tone.


Hanna: Unless you're texting me the answer, you're rude.

Spencer: I'm sorry. Toby's not back until Monday. That's a really long time to wait.

Hanna: Wait for what?

[spencer smiles]

Hanna: Ew! Why would you say that?

Spencer: I didn't say anything!


Hanna: First you're sexting Toby like some dog in heat and you're gumming at your dessert like my grandma. How long do you want that cookie to last?


Hanna: Are you buzzed?

Spencer: What? No! Hanna, focus.

Hanna: You have the same look in your eyes as this girl in my government class who hums and makes chokers out of paper clips.


Hanna: Dr. Oz says sex is a drug too, Spencer.


Clark: Are dolls your thing?

Aria: No, actually I find them pretty creepy but it's this new thing I'm trying - embracing the creepy.


Hanna: Omigawd, is that a kneecap?

Spencer: Don't touch it!

Hanna: Why would I touch it?!


Spencer: We don't know who [Charles] was close to, who he hung out with.

Hanna: We're never going to know that. Radley doesn't put out a yearbook.


Alison: You gonna bury me at Aunt Carol's farm too?


Emily: Why would [Lesli] torture us?

Hanna: Because she's unstable!


Spencer: Lesli must think that we helped Ali kill Bethany that night and then dumped her body in that pit.

Emily: Your sister did that.

Spencer: No, Melissa just buried her alive.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Sara: Which shirt should I wear to Caleb's offiice?

Emily: Um, your office is where Caleb plays Grand Theft Auto in his boxers.


Sara: What's Kimye?

Caleb: Kanye and Kim. Yeah, right. You wouldn't, uh, you've been... You know what actually? You don't even need to know. No one does.


Spencer: Are you stealing [Lesli]'s car?

Hanna: No, I am borrowing it. And don't get all preachy with me, Pufnstuf.


Aria: Lesli experiments on animals?

Hanna: Of course she does. What do you think we are to her?


Aria: What am I looking for?

Spencer: Well, she furnished an underground bunker so I'm guessing she must have a stack of receipts the size of a phonebook.


Hanna: Why am I beeping? I haven't even stolen anything yet. Spencer, say something! Why are we, like, radioactive?

Spencer: Bitch chipped us!


Hanna: Okay, Spencer, not all the cheese sticks! That's my dinner.

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Mona: Half the time I thought I was being haunted by Ali, & half the time I thought I was auditioning for American Idol.


Aria: Um, Hanna you're bleeding.

Hanna: What, where?

Emily: What do you mean "where?" Where Dr. Amateur Hour cut your neck open.

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Spencer: We are exactly where we were two months ago.

Hanna: Yeah, except now we have hardware on our necks. Gawd, we're like cyclops,

Spencer: Cyborgs.

Hanna: I'm pretty sure it's pronounced cyclops.


I'm sick and tired of TPTB portraying Hanna as an UTTER idiot with not a crumb of general knowledge, yet having to accept she's some sort of misunderstood braniac who outperforms everyone else! They could be more subtle conveying Hanna's dumbness!

Edited by Giuliano Lanzilli
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Emily: Ali's mom was practically the only person who visited him, who even knew that Charles existed.

Hanna: And he used her to fertilize Spencer's petunias.

Spencer: My mom grows azaleas.
Hanna: Whatever!


Ezra: Was that Clark? I was hoping I'd get a chance to meet him.

Aria: Is that why you were eavesdropping?

Ezra: You just met the guy. He sure was asking a lot of questions.

Aria: He's just worried about me. There's no need to be suspicious.

Ezra: Honestly I'm suspicious of everyone these days.

Aria: Well Clark is not some blue eyed blonde DiLaurentis boy. Relax.


Emily: Your mom got the email, right?

Aria: The memo about side boob and backless gowns? They send that out every year.


Hanna: What if this whole Carissimi Group set up is just one big elaborate black hoodie?

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Aria: Fill the ballroom with police. [Prom]'s fairy tale themed. They can come as the village idiots.


Spencer: That barn is not big enough for us, our dates, and our poofy dresses.


Aria: For all we know, Charles is in Spencer's barn right now installing a lethal disco ball.


Spencer: How's your arm?

Lorenzo: Still attached.


Emily: Okay, newsflash. Guess who Noel Kahn brought to the prom? Bridget Woo. And check this out - she's 85% tequila and her dress is on backwards.


Toby: Am I supposed to know these people?
Emily: No, you're just supposed to be looking at their outfits.

Ezra: Wait, is that a lantern or a hat?

Spencer: That's her hair.

Hanna: Wait, Lucas took Jenna to the prom? Seriously?

Aria: No, they're just standing next to each other.

Hanna: Yeah, holding hands.

Spencer: She's tipping him. She probably thinks he Ubered her there.


Clark: Hey, you are here.

Aria: Yeah, it's my prom. What are you doing here?

Clark: Taking pictures.

Aria: You don't go to school here, Clark. You're in college.


Hanna: Okay, you said one dance. This is more than I danced at the Katy Perry concert. If you were in New York, what were you doing there?

Caleb: Getting a job.

Hanna: But you already have a job.

Caleb: Not one that will pay for a move to New York.

Hanna: Yeah, that job is called bank robber.


Veronica: Oh gosh, I spilled.

Ella: Not enough.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Spencer: She's tipping him. She probably thinks he Ubered her there.


Uhh, yeah, about that Uber reference, would anyone in Rosewood even get that ?  Because Uber didn't even launch in Philly until June 2012, so I doubt it would have been available in the suburbs of Philly.   And Uber sure wasn't  as big a deal then like it is today.  It's like the writers keep forgetting that this is all taking place in 2012.

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^ That would hardly be the only thing they keep forgetting. But oh well, nothing a little time jump can't fix!

Toby: Am I supposed to know these people?

That was such a bitch line coming from Toby. You left high school some time ago, Toby, and not under the best circumstances, but maybe this isn't about you. Maybe this is, ya know, about their graduation.

Edited by Crim
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When Veronica decides to confront Kenneth, Pam (I think):  "You can't do that!"

Venonica [grabs her keys]:  "Watch me."


Ashley (I think):  Did anyone close the door?

Pam:  I'm not leaving my fingerprints on that!

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Aria: You knew that [Clark] was a cop?

Mona: Aria, maybe you thought he was always happy to see you but I could never get past the bulge in his pants.


Emily: Mona, just finish a sentence, please!


Hanna: You don't think that's Ali's chopped up body in those bags, is it?

Spencer: Hanna!

Hanna: What? Isn't that what we were all thinking?

Emily, Aria, and Sara: NO!


Hanna: Did we just walk inside A's brain?


Ali: How could you do this to me? I risked everything to help you.

Cece: You gave me a passport and a plane ticket. I'd hardly call that "everything."


Cece: One day classes were canceled. Okay, I called in a bomb threat.


Cece: I know what you're going to say - it's screwed up that I dated my brother.

Ali: Did you guys-

Cece: Okay, that's just sick, Ali. Like I said, it's my brother. Why do you think he was so mad all the time? He was so frustrated. Who could blame him? I mean, look at me.


Cece: I had to make it seem real so you'd pay attention. I'm not a bad person, Ali.

Ali: You almost froze Aria and Spencer to death.

Cece: Almost.

Ali: You drove a car through Emily's house.

Cece: Yeah, and I almost cut her in half too but is she hurt? No!


Cece: Sorry, Emily. But not really.


Spencer: How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard?

Emily: What brilliant scholar said that?

Spencer: Winnie the Pooh.

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