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Pretty Little Quotes: Two Can Keep a Secret If One Of Them Is Dead.

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Ashley: Soon people will forget what [Radley] was and we'll just be remembered for our exquisite brunch.
Hanna: My mother, the exorcist.

Spencer: The flag's a really nice touch. I never would have thought of it.

Veronica: It's your fault I'm doing this. You got involved in government first. You inspired me.
Spencer: I watch the government. I keep it honest. That's what I do.
Veronica: Sweetheart, you work for a lobbyist.
Spencer: No, we are not lobbyists. We work with grassroots political organizations to advance progressive legislation.
Veronica. Mmm hmm. You're a lobbyist.

Toby: It's harder than I thought. I curse a lot. It's very therapeutic.

Toby: [Caleb and I] went fishing last summer.
Spencer: Seriously?
Toby: Yeah. We're the brotherhood of ex-boyfriends. We gotta stick together.

Spencer: We're still friends and we're not just "let's go see a movie and have dinner" kind of friends. We're the "I saved your life, now you save mine" kind of friends.

Spencer: One thing I've learned from all of this is that people are not always the things that they do.

Emily: My dad taught me that fear is natural. It's a good instinct. He also said that you can decide what you're going to be afraid of. I decided that I am not afraid of Charlotte DiLaurentis.

Spencer: I miss your faces. You guys have such excellent faces.
Hanna: Well we should plan on seeing each other more often.
Aria: Yes, but not here.
Hanna: We can make a list of beautiful cities and go to each one of them.
Spencer: Paris, Rome, Madrid, Rio - we can party in every one of them and Ali and Charlotte can sit in that big ugly house and they can bake cookies.

Hanna: You'd think a place like this would have special drinks.
Emily: What kind of special drinks?
Hanna: We're sitting in a bar in what used to be a squirrel factory. I don't know, like an electroshock margarita.
Aria: Manic depressive mai tai?
Spencer: You guys are seriously lacking in any good taste. That's why I love you so much! I love each one of you.
Aria: Spencer loves us.
Emily: So I heard.

Hanna: Why can't they make quiet ice cubes?

Spencer: [Toby]'s building a house.
Hanna: He's building a house? With tools? By himself? Wow.
Spencer: Yeah, wow indeed. All I got was a chair and some lucky girl's gonna get an entire house.

[phone rings and Aria wakes up]
Hanna: Sit. Stay.
Spencer: She's not a poodle.

Caleb: Still a roadie for a bunch of dresses?
Hanna: That's me.

Aria: What is [Sara] doing [at Charlotte's funeral]?
Emily: Making sure that Charlotte's really dead.
Spencer: Really most sincerely dead.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
Fixed wonky spacing after forum upgrade
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Hanna: I wasn't that drunk.
Aria: You threw up in the bathtub.
Hanna: That was Emily, not me.

Caleb: [Going to therapy] isn't going to make anyone think you're capable of murder.
Spencer: No, but this might. It's a paper I wrote my sophomore year at Georgetown. Each of us had to do a case study on a unique murder and I did mine on a woman who was killed on her wedding night. Did you know that it's human instinct to go head first when you leap to your death?
Caleb: No.
Spencer: Well, it is. And later on they discovered that her neck was broken before she fell. She was found holding her bridal bouquet and her fingernails had been wiped clean.
Caleb: What class was this for?

Aria: You heard about what happened to [Ezra]'s girlfriend. He's not in a good place.
Jillian: No writer is ever in a good place, Aria.

[Spencer, Hanna, and Emily find footage of Aria coming back to the hotel after Charlotte's time of death]
Emily: What do we do? Do we erase the video?
Hanna: We're not in high school anymore.

Aria: Why is everything closed?
Ezra: It's suburban Pennsylvania at about 4am.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Lucas: I have a condo in Palo Alto and a townhouse in Hong Kong and a loft above the Grille.

Caleb: How'd it go?
Spencer: Not good. They asked me to lie.
Melissa: They don't want you to lie.
Spencer: They want me to use a non-denial denial.
Caleb: So lying.

Spencer: [Caleb] and I are friends.
Melissa: Really? Because I know how you like shopping out of other people's carts.

Aria: "And still there they were, stars reeling overhead, the earth barely moving beneath them. He knew in that moment whether they made it through this night or not, he'd finally met his match." Okay, is it just me or is this amazing?
Emily: .......

Emily: Aria, you [and Ezra] went through a lot together.
Aria: That was high school.
Emily: Not for him.

Aria: Can't Hanna's mom just kick [Sara] out of the hotel?
Emily: For what? You can't evict somebody for eating fried chicken with gloves.

Aria: I want you the entire world to know who you really are. You are compassionate, sensitive. You're kind.
Ezra: Maybe I'm not.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Aria: Ezra said he didn't [kill Charlotte].
Spencer: Maybe that's what you heard, Aria, but the rest of us heard Ezra kick us out of his apartment.

Yvonne: When I see a power saw, my mind sees a finger - with no hands.
Caleb: And a chainsaw takes me straight to no arms.
Yvonne: How about a woodchipper?
Caleb and Yvonne: Fargo!
Toby: And I see mulch.
Yvonne: That's because you don't watch tv.

Jordan: People screw up. That's why lawyers have jobs.

Hanna: My brain is telling me to be honest but my PTSD is telling me to shut the hell up.

Spencer: [Sara]'s the only person staying at the Radley who spent two years in Charlotte's school for stalkers.

Lawyer: Well, the good news is you didn't kill Charlotte.

Caleb: What was the name of your first pet?
Hanna: Guppy.
Caleb: You named your guppy Guppy?
Hanna: I was two.

Hanna: [Sara] put a do not disturb sign on her door two days ago and she instructed the staff to not go in her room while she's gone.
Emily: What's she doing in there?
Hanna: I'll take building a lair for $300, Alex.

Spencer: It's hard for all of us being back here. We have to force ourselves to remember we're not the people that we once were.

Hanna: My mom spent weeks trying to match the uniforms to those [carpet] colors.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Byron: DId I scare you?
Aria: Why are you sitting in the dark?

Hanna: You're making a lot of noise and none of it sounds like an omelette.

Jordan: What fun is a sleepover if we actually sleep?

Hanna: So what did you tell Pam?
Emily: You know you can never call my mom that to her face, right?

Hanna: This may sound crazy cynical, but if Byron and Ella do get remarried, doesn't that mean she won't have to testify against him?
Emily: Did I miss the memo that says we call people's parents by their first names now?

Aria: You [and Byron] were together the whole night?
Ella: I am not the kind of mom who wants to share those details.

Caleb: Ten bucks says Evil Emoji's trying to stir the pot. And probably hacked both your phones.

Spencer: Um, I did something not entirely out of character but just out of practice.
Hanna: What's going on, Spencer?
Spencer: Toby's fiancee kind of left this [cell phone] and I kinda sorta didn't give it back right away.

Hanna: I don't know who's more needy today - Sara Harvey and this frickin' hard drive or my boss and her gum.

Mona: I wouldn't want people to think you stole someone's phone, somebody whose mother is running against your mother. That would be awkward.

Spencer: Please tell me you don't own a selfie stick.
Aria: Don't judge me. These things come in handy.

Spencer: I haven't broken into a place since my dorm room. Those keys cost like $100 to replace.

Claudia: Crimson! Scarlet! Vermillion! How am I the only designer in Manhattan with an assistant that can't grasp the concept of RED?

Aria: If [Sara]'s refusing maid service, shouldn't this [hotel room] be a little bit messier?
Spencer: It doesn't even look like she's slept here.
Aria: Either that or she's learned how to make hospital corners with her teeth.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Hanna: How did you find this place?
Jordan: I searched for "romantic" and then "tacky."

Emily: Think about it - all the people who could have killed Charlotte, they might have done it because they thought that's what we wanted.
Hanna: What kind of nut would think that?

Spencer: What happens if I just ask you something straight out?
Mona: Try it and see.

Spencer: You wanted me to have [Yvonne's phone]. You wanted me to find something.
Mona: That sounds very elaborate.

Caleb: Do you believe [Mona]?
Spencer: I think it's the truth.
Caleb: It might be the truth, but you believe Mona? You believe why she did this?
Spencer: I don't think anybody knows why Mona does anything, including Mona.

Liam: There's a fine line between trouble and high adventure.

Hanna: I poked the bear and the bear stole Emily's eggs.
Caleb: We poked the bear together.
Hanna: So it is our fault?
Caleb: What happened to Emily? No. Bullies don't need an excuse. They're just bullies.

Caleb: The Hamptons are just another part of Manhattan except it takes three hours to get there.

Hanna: What do you want?
Caleb: What do you want?
Hanna: I want to be in place where we don't have to ask each other what we want.

Caleb: I have a message for you and all those little Monas running around in your head.

Mona: Just out of curiosity, who kisses better? Hanna, Spencer, or me?

Veronica: When am I doing Drive by Scranton? Who's driving in Scranton at 5am?

Hanna: Sorry about grabbing your boob, Em.

Caleb: Maybe they'll have an attack of conscience and take the high road.
Spencer: There's never any traffic up there.

Ezra: I should be honored that you thought I would kill someone for you.

Ezra: I was about twenty miles outside of town when I started to think about all the lies I've told you, everything that I've talked you into, everything I talked myself into.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Hanna: Who leaves coleslaw in the middle of the floor?

Spencer: Don't do this to yourself. [Sara] may have nothing to do with the fertility clinic. She's just playing on your fear.
Emily: Yeah, well, it's working. It's not like someone stole my chapstick. This person may be storing my future offspring in a styrafoam cooler.

Liam: Did you sleep at all last night?
Aria: I'll sleep when I'm unemployed. Jillian's going to fire me.
Liam: Or give you a book contract.

Ella: When Byron and I first got married, we were very determined not to be traditional so we rented a barn and we basically dressed up like cowhands.
Hanna: Well, that's cute. I love theme weddings.
Ella: It wasn't a theme. It was just two cynical college kids with no money and a skewed sense of what was romantic. We made my mom sit on a keg.

Veronica: You look like a kid who just dropped her sucker in the sand.

Aria: I can't really tell if you want to hug me or punch me.

Hanna: What are you doing here?
Melissa: I live here. Well, not in this bathroom.

Hanna: You can't be nervous. You've married Bryon before.

Aria: Who are we when we're alone?  And who are we when we're with this other person?

Liam: So where are [Ella and Byron] going for their honeymoon?
Aria: Atlantic City. My mom had a Groupon.

Aria: Were you guys -
Elliott: Looking to get married. Tonight. Alison tells me you're now licensed.
Aria: Wait, you want to get married? You want me to marry you? To each other? Right now?
Elliott: Is English her first language?

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Aria: Were you guys -

Elliott: Looking to get married. Tonight. Alison tells me you're now licensed.

Aria: Wait, you want to get married? You want me to marry you? To each other? Right now?

Elliott: Is English her first language?

I so wanted Ali's next line to be "Yes, but she spent more time studying the teacher than the subject"

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Aria: Since when do you not like bridal showers? Gifts, expensive lingerie, cake. They were made for you.

Ashley: Honey, it's the first time in years that you and you friends have all been in the same place.
Hanna: Yeah, because of a murder investigation.

Emily: [Melissa] probably has some special fugitive rate from the airlines.

Emily: So you're saying that [whistletip] noise is on purpose?
Ezra: Yeah, I think it's a sad desperate pleas for attention but I don't know, maybe I'm cranky from lack of sleep.

Emily: I called the auto shop but no one answered so I'm going to go over there.
Hanna: And do what? Pretend like you want to trick out your sedan?

Ashley: Hanna, can you help me turn on the air? Earlier I tried to use the oven and Beyonce started playing.

Hanna: You're going to let [Caleb] stay at our house?
Ashley: My house. And it seemed like he didn't have any place else to go.
Hanna: He's an adult, not a pound puppy.

Spencer: Do you want me to do this or not?
Caleb: Not. I keep saying that and you keep ignoring me.

Caleb: What do you want to do? Do you want to waltz into Rosewood Police and tell them to slap cuffs on a girl with no hands?
Spencer: She has hands!

Caleb: I'm not going to let anybody hurt you.
Spencer: It's kind of hard for me to take comfort from that when you still have blood coming out of your nose.

Liam: It wasn't an accident. [Ezra] didn't fall off a bicycle. He made a decision.

Spencer: Caleb and I had nothing to do with [the information about Yvonne being leaked]. How do I know that you didn't do it? I mean, accusing other people of something that you've done? That's does have kind of a vintage Mona quality about it.

Ezra: "This season is all about the prints. The bolder, the brighter, the better. But how, you ask, can I incorporate such strong design elements into my wardrobe?" You know, maybe there's something snappier in the waiting room, like a car manual.
Aria: It's informative.
Ezra: If it's informative you want, I suggest we give that pamphlet on staph infection another shot.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Aria: Mona basically told you she was ready to kill Charlotte.
Emily: Yeah, but she didn't because Charlotte never showed up.
Spencer: Not guilty because the victim didn't show? That's setting the bar pretty low, Em.

Emily: So we believe [Mona]?
Spencer: We believe her enough.

Hanna: I put post-its on what [ties] goes with what [shirts].
Lucas: Terrific. Garanimals for grown ups.

Alison: I was really, really happy the moment before I tripped. I wonder if that's why I fell. Maybe every good thing has to be paid for by a bad thing.
Elliott: That's not how the universe works.
Alison: Sometimes I feel like I'm being punished for surviving, still being alive.
Elliott: Or maybe you just snagged your shoe on the carpet. The planets did not align to give you a bump on the head. It was an accident. That's all.

Spencer: She says it was an accident.
Emily: Do we believe that?
Hanna: As much as I believe Aria being seared was an accident.
Aria: What do you think, Spence?
Spencer: Two out of five in the ER? That's forty percent. It's sixty if you count what happened to Emily's eggs.

Spencer: Mona's changed so many times, I doubt she even knows herself when she looks in the mirror.

Aria: So that's what really happened?
Ezra: Yeah, not very romantic, is it? You're a bad influence on me. You make me want to be honest.
[feel free to take a few minutes to go buy some chickpeas while you wipe away the tears of laughter at Ezra pretending that he wants to be honest]

Ezra: Do we tell it the way that it should have been or do we tell it the way that it happened?
Aria: We tell it the way that makes the best story.

Emily: It still sounds-
Hanna: Crazy, yes, we've established that.
Spencer: Hanna has the plan and Caleb has the know how and if we don't back them up, they're just going to do it by themselves.
Emily: Is that true?
Hanna: Yeah.

Ezra: I'm sort of a luddite when it comes to ebooks. I still think ink on acid free paper is going to win out.

Caleb: I would ask how you're doing but I'm a stockholder so I already know.

Mona: Leave them alone.
Sara: Not until I get what's coming to me.
Mona: Charlotte's dead. You can't get reparations from a corpse.
Sara; You can if you know where to dig.
Mona: Be careful. No one blames you for what Charlotte made you do, but what you do now, that's all yours.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Spencer: She says it was an accident.

Emily: Do we believe that?

Hanna: As much as I believe Aria being seared was an accident.

Aria: What do you think, Spence?

Spencer: Two out of five in the ER? That's forty percent. It's sixty if you count what happened to Emily's ex.


I initially heard it that way too, but I'm pretty sure Spencer said "Emily's eggs". .

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Spencer: "Look, a free range Mona is more likely to lead us someplace, especially if she thinks we believe her."

Emily: "So we believe her?"

Spencer: "We believe her enough."

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Hahaha, even as I was typing that line, I was like wait, what did New A do to Paige? Obviously I need to pay better attention!

The issue is that she didn't pronounce it "aiggs." Really, Shay's just been trying to help us avoid the confusion all this time, it has nothing to do with her Canadian accent.

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Emily: How do you know how to build an electric fence?
Caleb: I googled "how to build an electric fence."

Spencer: I can't think of another reason you'd be crazy enough to show up here.
Mona: Really, Spencer? From one ex Radley patient to another, I'd think you'd be a little more sensitive to that word.

Yvonne: I won't let you turn me into the woman who says, "Pick me, not her."

Spencer: Mona, are you still stalking us?

Caleb: I should have checked the floors.
Ezra: Caleb, who would have thought to do that?
Caleb: A!

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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  • 3 months later...

Spencer: You've gotten a lot better at [picking locks].
Toby: Yeah, I took a tactical lock opening course at the academy.

Ezra: Well, that's a little weird.
Aria: Please don't tell me that you found a [sex] toy. It's already bad enough that I'm going through Alison's panty drawer.

Caleb: Bleach, charcoal, vinegar.
Mona: That's everything you need to cover up a murder.

Mary: I was born first and [Jessica] was born jealous.

Aria: You and I haven't even talked about what happened between us. Was it a slip? Are we friends with benefits? Are we even a we again?
Ezra: I guess we have a lot to talk about.

Caleb: What is [Mary] doing?
Mona: It's called pacing.
Caleb: You know, I can actually appreciate your skill set, but do you always have to be such a smartass?
Mona: Do you always have to be so direct?
Caleb: I'm just giving you a compliment.
Mona: Calling me names isn't complimentary.
Caleb: You know, she's in there alone. We could take her.
Mona: And then what? We waterboard her?

Caleb: Don't shush me!

Spencer: A dream is an experience and an experience is real.

Elliot: Just like you, Alison, karma can be such a bitch.

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Emily: Place like [Welby] are designed to keep people from getting out, not from getting in. Maybe we need to warn Elliot.
Spencer: What do you want to tell him? That we told someone his wife killed her own sister who's actually her cousin?

Emily: Do you want to call Jordan?
Hanna: And tell him what? That I got myself a little kidnapped for a while?

Caleb: Hanna's like an aircraft carrier - a lot of fire power but pretty difficult to maneuver.

Hanna: Lucas, why are you doing this for me? You could be out building some private spaceship or something.
Lucas: The private spaceship market is sort of overcrowded at the moment.

Aria: We just want to see her.
Emily: All we need is five minutes.
Elliot: If you really want to help, you'll give Alison time and space to heal. That's what she needs and that's what I'm going to make sure she gets. I'm sorry if you can't understand that. I know that you're her friends but I am her husband and her doctor.
Spencer: Maybe that's not the best combination.

Aria: Is that the kind of diplomacy you learned in Washington?
Spencer: I'm sorry, Aria. I have a very low tolerance for condescension.

Liam: And there's a problem with his backstory. I just noticed it this last time through.
Ezra: What sort of problem?
Liam: The predatory nature of his actions.
Ezra: You think he comes across as predatory?
Liam: I understand the impulse, the Lolita myth - not the Nabokov original but the whole older man, inappropriately young girl idea that's been trashed by lesser writers.
Ezra: Well, we can't all be Nabokov. Most of us can't even manage Nicholas Sparks.
Liam: At least Sparks understands what a reader can tolerate and what makes their skin crawl.
Ezra: Are we looking at the same pages here? Because they aren't that far apart in age so I'm having a little trouble seeing what you're seeing here.
Liam: That's because he's your hero. You're invested in justifying his actions. You're too close to see him as he really is.

Mary: That's true, but not really honest.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
Missing a letter
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Liam is for sure the episode MVP, perhaps the series MVP in a literal sense. The value of his callout is one of the strongest messages this show can be sending, possibly only behind Hanna's smack down of Gabriel a couple of seasons back. Ezra is the Dolores Umbridge of this show; he's the person who damaged the hero in a manner that's on its face less significant than the main villain's actions, but more realistic and thus more resonant. A is a ghost ninja, a time-traveling super genius, an entity beyond reasoning, but Ezra is a predatory creep that most of the target audience WILL run into in life. Please don't back down from this, show. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Aria: We need to tell the truth.
Spencer: What truth is that? The one where Hanna doesn't know the right pedal from the left?

Emily: There's nothing weird in [Elliott's phone] other than the fact that there's nothing weird in here. As far as I can tell, the guy never even used an emoji.

Spencer: Whoa whoa whoa, wipe [Elliott's phone] down first! You know, you always used to make fun of me for carrying these [wipes] around but now who's an uptight nerd?
Emily: You. Still you.

Elliott's bio on the Welby State Psychiatric Hospital website:


Staff Psychiatrist

Elliott Rollins, M.D.

Elliott Rollins graduated with honors from the University of Washington School of Medicine as a Medical Doctor specializing in Psychiatry. He has earned distinction in the areas of Clinical Neurophysiology and Neurodevelopment Disorder. Dr. Rollins comes to us from private practice, deciding he wanted to be of service to those most in need. Although Dr. Rollins is a relatively recent addition to the Welby Staff he has very quickly become a favorite of patient and other staff members.

Alison: [Elliott] was in love with Charlotte. That's what the girl at the farm said, right?
Aria: Yeah, but she also carried around a doll with no face.

Alison: Why do I still think that a lie will sound better than the truth?

Hanna: How did you find Lucas's car?
Mona: It wasn't that hard. You didn't exactly do a crackerjack job erasing the tire tracks, and the bloody windshield told me the rest.
Aria: So do you make it a habit of inserting yourself into other people's homicides or just ours?
Mona: Torching the car would have been a bonehead move.
Hanna: Why? It would have gotten rid of blood and fingerprints.
Mona: An abandoned car scorched in the middle of the woods tends to raise some eyebrows.

Hanna: Holy-
Aria: Shhhh.

Emily: You're staying at the Radley?
Jenna: Oh, didn't you hear? My house blew up.

Aria: So the day after we run someone over, [Jenna] comes tapping through town?
Hanna: It's a coincidence.
Spencer: There's no such thing. Coincidences are the devil's way of remaining anonymous.

Mona: Han, we used to spend weekends browsing the Tiffany's catalogue. You think I don't know a fake diamond when I see one?

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
missing a letter
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Emily: So Rollins had a burner phone AND a burner apartment?

Ali: All those lies I told, you'd think I would have seen Elliott coming from a mile away.

Aria: Are you putting your hand in [the dirty sink]?
Emily: You're the one sitting on the bed.

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Best quote of the season so far:

Aria:  "I have to go."

Ali:  "Right NOW, Aria??"


The combination of the words, the way the lines were delivered and Ali's glare made that An Epic Moment!

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21 hours ago, dwmckim said:

Best quote of the season so far:

Aria:  "I have to go."

Ali:  "Right NOW, Aria??"

I feel like this is a pretty accurate summary of Aria's entire arc across all 7 seasons. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Aria: That voice may have sounded like Rollins but he's dead. He's really truly dead.
Hanna: Yeah, well we thought Ali was dead too, remember? And she survived. Back in the 1900s, they used to bury people alive all the time. They used to find scratch marks inside of coffins.
Aria: Hanna, seriously, you've got to stop reading Wikipedia.

Jenna: Emily? What are you doing here?
Sara: She was looking at your computer.
Emily: Someone is threatening us again and I think it's you.
Jenna: Oh, really? How come?
Emily: Because you're here.

Alison: [Charlotte] lied to me. She lied about everything - doctor, Mary Drake, being friends with Jenna.
Emily: That doesn't mean that Charlotte didn't love you.
Alison: Love me? I didn't even know she had a boyfriend. And then I married him.

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Alison: Please give [Mary] a chance.
Jason: A chance to do what?

Hanna: I found/stole my mom's keycard so we need to use it before anybody notices it's missing - so like, now.

Aria: Are we actually considering this? Do you think we can seriously pull off an elopement?
Ezra: Aria, Sara Harvey was found dead at the Radley. Let's just go and get out of this town.
Aria: Don't you think skipping town might seem a little suspicious?
Ezra: Suspicious to who? You didn't kill Sara....did you?

Noel Kahn: Hi, Emily. I always knew you'd never get out of Rosewood.

Aria: Travelling really brought out the rugged in you. And you kept the beard.
Jason: You look great.
Aria: I'm engaged.
Jason: To Liam.
Aria: ...To Ezra.

Hanna: You know you can turn the lights on. [Jenna] won't know the difference.

Emily: In twenty years, you're not going to look back and remember that time you missed breaking into a storm cellar.

Emily: Ugh, that smell. It smells like grandma's house.
Spencer: Yeah, if grandma died, was eaten by her cats, and then found five days later.

Spencer: So Charlotte had a biological brother or sister.
Emily: Who might want revenge.
Hanna: Well, that's great. Now we another cousin who wants to kill us.

[Spencer, Hanna, Emily, and Alison look at Jessica's wall of crazy stalker pictures]
Hanna: Damn, my hair looked good.

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Hanna: See? No story with Noel Kahn in it has a happy ending!

Hanna: What about Jenna? Any tapping around we need to be worried about?

Emily: Aria, take a deep breath. It's been proven to prevent explosions in small women.

Aria: Nicole could be alive!
Emily: First off, you can't root for her not to be alive.

Ezra: Emily, I appreciate you coming, I really do, and I believe you when you say it was your idea to delete [Nicole's] call, but that doesn't change the fact that [Aria] still did it.
Emily: Can you blame her?
Ezra: Uh, yeah, a little.

Spencer: Hey, curb the perv or the bottle walks.

Spencer: What else can you tell us about [Mary Drake]?
Dr. Cochran: She lacked common sense and discrimination.

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Jason: I was thinking that maybe you'd want to come with me.
Aria: To Ethiopia? What would I do there?
Jason: Help people who have bigger problems than we do.

Lindsey: I couldn't wait to get out of here. Now I kind of wish I could go back [to high school].
Emily: Really? You miss being stalked and having acne that won't go away?

Emily: What are you doing?
Spencer: I'm breaking in.

Aria; Jason's mother is dead. His dad disappeared. His other cousin was murdered a few weeks ago and his only other sibling was just released from a psychiatric hospital.

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Hanna: Wake up, bitch!

Mona: Next time call me before you abduct someone and go on the run. It just makes my life a little easier.

Hanna: I was sure Noel was our guy and you guys were just getting cold feet.
Spencer: If by getting cold feet you meant we weren't willing to abduct someone and beat a confession out of them then yes, we got cold feet.

Hanna: I got the test results back and Noel isn't Mary's second child.
Alison: He isn't?
Aria: So you're saying [Noel]'s not AD?
Hanna: I'm not really saying that either.
Alison: What ARE you saying, Hanna?
Hanna; I'm saying that I have Noel tied up to a chair in an old motel room and we need to deal with that.

Hanna: [Noel] took the camera. He can make it look like I kidnapped him.
Alison: You DID kidnap him, Hanna!
Hanna: Well now he can prove it.

Jenna: I didn't lose my sight. You took it from me.

Alison: Is there a blind baby epidemic I didn't know about?

Aria: I think I just walked into Tim Burton's garage sale.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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  • 1 month later...
  • 6 months later...

Alison: Pregnant, stalked, broke, alone. If that's okay, I'm your girl.

Mona: I have a scathingly brilliant idea. Don't leave town.
Hanna: That's what the police say in all the movies.
Mona: Do you trust me?
Hanna: Sometimes.

Spencer: Are you saying there were TWO people shooting at me?

Hanna: It's hard to imagine Spencer at a loss for words.

Holden: This is my sister's business. She needed a brilliant but affordable chef.
Aria: You're a chef?
Holden: Yeah, I try to cultivate one new skill a year. So you're getting married?
Aria: That's me.
Holden: Who's the lucky guy?
Aria: That would be Ezra.
Holden: No kidding.
Aria: No kidding.
Holden: And they say high school romances don't last.

Paige: You don't have to protect me from Ali. And if you thought you had to protect Alison from me, well, you're not paying attention.

Holden: What type of bride do you envision yourself as? Spring? Autumn? Or a half price November through March bride?

Hanna: How do you know Katherine Daly?
Mona: I do not know Katherine Daly. Katherine Daly knows me.

Veronica: Honey, what happened?
Spencer: Uh, Alison's husband wasn't a real doctor. Turns out that he was a crook and he took all of her money. Noel Kahn kidnapped Hanna. She got away. Noel Kahn is now dead. Jenna Marshall shot me - probably. Toby and Yvonne were in a car crash. Do you want a glass of wine?

Veronica: What did [Mary Drake] tell you?
Spencer: What do you think she told me?
Veronica: Spencer, tell me what she said. Now. Please.
Spencer: She said that you're not my mother. My birth mother. That she is.
Veronica: ....
Spencer: Okay, now would be the time to make a strong statement of denial.
Veronica: Mary Drake is clinically insane.
Spencer: That's not a denial.

Veronica: I was sitting in this room working and Jessica knocked on the door. I hadn't said five words to her since Jason was born and there she was like any neighbor, come to borrow a lawnmower or a husband.

Paige: I bet Mrs. Horowitz remembers how you were too [in high school], Alison. You were pretty unforgettable.
Alison: Thank you.
Paige: It wasn't a compliment.

Toby: Maybe this town has to disappear before we can leave.

Hanna: Katherine thinks I work for you. Did you tell her that this was your business?
Mona: No, never. It must be my natural aura of authority and knowledge.

Mona: I was just excited for us to finally work together. You know, on something other than kidnapping my ex-boyfriend.

Hanna: I want business cards.
Mona: Fine. It'll say you're the boss in gold leaf, embossed.

Hanna: If the note [from Mary] really did come out of that thing, I say we get a crowbar and see what else is in there.
Alison: It's not a pinata, Hanna.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Aria: Can it see us or not?
Alison: Yes. It's punishing Hanna for attacking it with a steak knife.

Alison: "Them" is a vindictive blind girl.
Aria: This can't be just Jenna.
Alison: Why not?
Hanna: Because she's a vindictive blind girl. How could she create an entire board game if she can't even tell if her blouse is on inside out?
Alison: Well it didn't stop anyone from selling her a firearm.

Hanna: [Jenna's] help is dead. His head rolled over your feet, remember?

Emily: We're all scrambling like mice like we're still in high school.
Hanna: You are.
Emily: I park in the faculty lot now, Hanna.

Spencer: It might not be first degree murder but we still kind of broke a few laws.

Spencer: So only you and dad could appreciate the bitter irony of me checking into the same mental hospital where I was born.

Mona: [Katie] kept droning on about gloves but I talked her out of that one. I'm like Katie, if you start covering up your arms, people are going to think you're a stripper. Or a junkie. Or both. Just hit refresh on that spray tan, hon.

Mona: Why are you eating insecurity for breakfast?

Mona: Han, no masterpiece is ever complete. If someone hadn't pulled Mona Lisa off da Vinci's easel, he would have given her a perm.
Hannah: When did you have a perm?

Emily: Is it just me or-
Alison: [Addison]'s worse. At least when I threatened adults, I looked up from my phone.

Hannah: The belt makes the dress. If I lose the belt, I have nothing. What do I have? I have a hippie ballet costume. It's like the Sugar Plum Fairy meets the Grateful Dead.

Holden: Can I trust you with a knife?
Aria: Not that one. It's bigger than me.

Holden: Is Ezra the only one who's ever told you he's loved you?

Emily: This is about a vile brat who's determined to take down an adult that dared to discipline her. She's a bully.

Fury: We're not alone.
Jenna: I know. I can hear her breathe.

Aria: How could ]Jenna] just walk in[to the police station]?
Spencer: I'll tell you how. Because she has balls the size of church bells!
Aria: Okay, well, I didn't need that image.

Alison: I don't think [the board game] takes questions. It's not a ouija board.

Hanna: I don't need help ripping a dress off [Jenna]!

Holden: The road to every altar is paved with bad decisions.

Alison: Jenna reduced [Emily] to blackmailing a tenth grader.

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Emily: There's a lot of red tape when you're trying to unmarry a dead identify thief.

Hanna: Guys aren't going to go through a girl's purse because they're too afraid to accidentally touch a tampon.

Fury: Where did you learn how to play [ping pong]?
Spencer: Horseback riding camp.

Fury: The neighborhood was a little rougher then. We ponged hard.

Emily: How do you know all this?
Aria: Caleb taught me this morning.
Emily: You? The same girl who accidentally had her phone on airplane mode for half of ninth grade.

Emily: [Jenna] gets her eyesight back - again.

Sydney: Namaste, bitch!

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Hanna: Did Sydney lead you to Jenna?
Emily: Not unless Jenna lives in the bathroom of a Greyhound bus. That's where Sydney left the tracker that we put in her bag.

Aria: But [Nicole] knows now? About everything.
Ezra: The wedding dress in the closet was a pretty big giveaway.

Fury: Anything you can tell us about anyone who might have had a motive or held a grudge [against Wrollins] could help us out significantly.
Alison: He was a con artist who treated dozens of mental patients without any actual medical training. Yeah, I know a few people who might hold a grudge.

Hanna: AD doesn't get to poison Caleb, bankrupt Lucas's company, ruin my reputation, and then expose us for murder all in one go. No. What are the rules for this stupid game anyway? Every time we fail a turn, the cops get a piece of Archer? What's next? His kneecaps or his earlobes?

Hanna: When did you decide to start sleeping with the guy who could one day arrest us all?
Spencer: I didn't decide. I was upset about Toby and Yvonne, and Marco came over. He's nice.
Hanna: I have no issue with his personality, just his job.

Hanna: Spencer, Mary was in the blind school when you got shot. She could have seen the second shooter. Maybe she saw AD and that's why she ran away.
Spencer: Or she ran away because when she told me that she was my birth mother, she realized it was a colossal mistake and that she never wanted to see me again.
Hanna: No, Spencer, that's crazy.
Spencer: Well, crazy runs in my family. Look, I want to find her. Believe me, I do. I just have so many questions, I wouldn't even know where to start.
Hanna: How about "Why'd you run away?"

Spencer: Hanna, you made that old man cry!

Hanna: Do you still have the same email?
Pastor Ted: Still Hotmail. Don't judge. I'm old.

Aria: You shot Spencer. You helped Jenna escape. You made up the game.
Sydney: Correct.
[Me: Ehhhhhh.]

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hanna: Why do [superheroes] always have such big arms? How can they even put on spandex with these things?

Hanna: Lucas wouldn't hurt us.
Emily: Then let's prove it.
Hanna: Anything in the pictures?
Emily: Lots of photos from Comic Con.

Hanna: I was such a cute baby. What? I was. My mom has pictures.

Emily: Whoever did this to us, I don't want them to win.
Alison: You think that's a good enough reason to have a baby?

Mona: I can feel where it's warm, where the batteries are.
Hanna: Batteries? I thought it ran on bitchiness.

Hanna: Mona, I brought you here to help me, not to admire the craftsmanship.

Ezra: I'll be back in two days.
Aria: I don't want you to come back. I want you to stay.
Ezra: You're putting me in the middle here.
Aria: No. You're in the middle. I did not put you there.

Spencer: You followed me?
Fury: Yes.
Spencer: You saw I was going some place and you followed me.
Fury: That's right.
Spencer: And then you waited outside for an hour.
Fury: Fifty eight minutes.

Alison: You don't have to leave Rosewood.
Paige: That's what everyone keeps telling me.

Paige: That's what made you such a terrible person. Sorry, a person who sometimes did terrible things.

Spencer: Wren was almost my brother in law a couple of times.

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Hanna: [Lucas] is weak. It doesn't make him sick.
Emily: What about destroying Ali's memorial, stealing Caleb's money, joining Mona's army? He has a dark side, Hanna. We all do when we're pushed hard enough.

Aria: You were once so afraid of Lucas, you pushed him out of a rowboat.

Ali: We've tried this a million times. When has it ever worked?
Spencer: It only has to work once.

Ali: I knew pregnancy would come with some crazy erratic mood swings. I just didn't think they'd be yours.

Spencer: So that's why you stole back the comic book?
Lucas: It's a graphic novel and I didn't.

Ali: You were the one that used a Pottery Barn candlestick as a deadly weapon.

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  • 2 weeks later...

AD: Does the groom know that you once referred to him as a twisted conniving predator?
Aria: Stop!
AD: Or that you wanted the Rosewood police to formally charge him for exploiting a teenager when he was in a position of power?

Hanna: Detective Fury said that there was a flood at the Radley and someone saw us there.
Caleb: Why wouldn't they? I live there.
Fury: Yet you shower here.
Caleb: Hanna has nicer shampoo. Why are the police investigating a flood? Doesn't that fall under bad plumbing?

Spencer: My mom hired a realtor who thinks that having a paper clip is too much clutter.

Mona: Sorry I'm late. What did I miss?
Spencer: Uh, an invitation.

Mona: I guess you're forgetting who replaced the shattered windshield once you peeled Dunhill off of it which makes me an accessory to your crime, and if you think I'm going to leave my fate in your fumbling hands you've been smoking the drapes.

Veronica: Who recorded that conversation?
Peter: How should I know? It was a hundred years ago.
Spencer: Six.

Ezra: What are you stressed about? I'm the one whose best man may be coming down the aisle via skype.
Caleb: Does that mean he can wear half a tuxedo?

Ezra: That, my friends, is what a happy bride looks like.

Ezra: Maybe there's some part of you that has never forgiven me for taking advantage of you and your friends for the sake of a book.

Spencer: When did we go from dating to stalking?

Aria: Mrs. Hastings, I am so sorry. Please forgive me.
Veronica: Forgive you? Oh, honey. You're just a selfish little bitch. I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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18 minutes ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

AD: Does the groom know that you once referred to him as a twisted conniving predator?
Aria: Stop!
AD: Or that you wanted the Rosewood police to formally charge him for exploiting a teenager when he was in a position of power?

Hanna: Detective Fury said that there was a flood at the Radley and someone saw us there.
Caleb: Why wouldn't they? I live there.
Fury: Yet you shower here.
Caleb: Hanna has nicer shampoo. Why are the police investigating a flood? Doesn't that fall under bad plumbing?

Spencer: My mom hired a realtor who thinks that having a paper clip is too much clutter.

Mona: Sorry I'm late. What did I miss?
Spencer: Uh, an invitation.

Mona: I guess you're forgetting who replaced the shattered windshield once you peeled Dunhill off of it which makes me an accessory to your crime, and if you think I'm going to leave my fate in your fumbling hands you've been smoking the drapes.

Veronica: Who recorded that conversation?
Peter: How should I know? It was a hundred years ago.
Spencer: Six.

Ezra: What are you stressed about? I'm the one whose best man may be coming down the aisle via skype.
Caleb: Does that mean he can wear half a tuxedo?

Ezra: That, my friends, is what a happy bride looks like.

Ezra: Maybe there's some part of you that has never forgiven me for taking advantage of you and your friends for the sake of a book.

Spencer: When did we go from dating to stalking?

Aria: Mrs. Hastings, I am so sorry. Please forgive me.
Veronica: Forgive you? Oh, honey. You're just a selfish little bitch. I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire.

It does feel like the writers read some of the criticism before penning this episode.

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Spencer: That's not fair.
Tanner: Fairness is overrated. Truth is what counts.

Hanna: Aria, we literally caught you in a black hoodie!

Aria: Ezra would have gone to jail!
Alison: So what?

Hanna: Time is stupid.
Spencer: That's my favorite thing that you've ever said.
Hanna: How is it after everything we've been through, one or all of us is about to go to jail?
Emily: Well, this time around is kind of special. We did kill a guy.

Aria: I was so angry when I wrote that [police report].
Ezra: I know, and you should have been angry. The book I was writing about Alison, the way we met, and I started this relationship by lying to you. I wouldn't have blamed you if you had turned in that file then or now. I would have deserved it and maybe I still do.
Aria: No. No, you don't.
Me: YES, yes, you do!

Emily: Rosewood is a place where dreams go to die?

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Ezra: You have an alibi. You're in the clear. There's nothing linking you to what happened to Dunhill.
Aria: His body's in the trunk of my car.

Ezra: First we need to deal with that problem in your trunk.
Aria: How?
Ezra: I have a Master's degree in American literature. There's nothing I can't handle.

Names written on the blackboard:
Alison Dilaurentis
Alison Dilaurentis-Fields
Vivian Darkbloom
Holly Varjack
Emma Thorwald
Mrs. Rollins

Caleb: There's a part of me that wants to say I'm sorry.
Spencer: To whom?
Caleb: To the only person I know who uses "whom" in a conversation.

Charlotte: You were always the smart one, Mona, not Spencer.

Charlotte: None of you are sure when you look in the mirror. None of you are really certain who you are. I did that. I took that away from you.

Hanna: What is it? A flipping cartoon?
Spencer: Augmented reality.
Hanna: Not really an answer.

Tanner: What I believe and what I can prove are two different things.

Tanner: You're not criminals. Not really. Try to remember that.

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Aria: Can we just take a second to appreciate this Robert Redford Barbra Streisand The Way We Were moment?
Ezra: Didn't they break up in that movie?
Aria: Yeah, but in my head the new wife dies and then they just get back together.

Jenna: I may not be able to see but I can smell a bitch a mile away.

Aria: Things definitely got a little tense when our mothers started discussing the seating chart.
Ezra: Tense? My mother almost threw a centerpiece at Ella's head.
Aria: Diane said that she knocked it across the room by accident.

Toby: Still reading the dictionary for fun?

Ashley: Hanna, what were you thinking?
Alison: Are you nuts?
Ashley: I'll let you take over from here.

Hanna: Caleb didn't want to leave Mona at home alone and it's hard to find a sitter for someone in their mid-20s.

Ezra: I never asked for your blessing.
Byron: If that's what's happening now, I gotta say you've left it down to the wire.
Ezra: I never asked because I never really felt like you and Ella truly accepted me.
Byron: You never really worked to prove us wrong. You never made a persuasive argument as to why we should feel good about you as a son-in-law.
[in my PLL universe, this is where Byron stopped talking]

Ella: If I didn't love Aria so much, I would strangle [Ezra's mother] with her own pearls.
Veronica: Peter's mother was pretentious like that - ate a slice of pizza with a knife and fork.
Ashley: I eat pizza with a knife and fork.
Ella: When I told Diane we weren't members of the country club, she looked at me like I'd spit out a tooth.
Ashley: Your fingers don't get greasy and the cheese doesn't slide off.
Ella: Sometimes I wish we were still in the basement. At least then we had some peace and quiet.
Veronica: Omigawd, you remember how we got out of there?
Ashley: You know Pam didn't drink for a year after that.
Veronica: Forget I brought it up.

Ashley: Don't take for granted the people who love you the most, just because they sometimes let you.

Aria: It wasn't about you. It was about me. Can you understand that?

Ezra: I wish you had as much faith in me as I have you in.
Aria: I love you.
Ezra: I love you too. But that's not really the same thing, is it?

Emily: [Pam] put something in your purse. What was it?
Alison: I don't know. Breath mints? Your mom's pretty passive aggressive and there were onions on those sliders.

Hanna: What are you watching?
Caleb: I can't tell. It's either a really bad comedy about chefs or a really good informercial about deep fryers.

Spencer: I don't know what question to ask first.

Alex: I guess you'd say [Wren] has a type. First [Melissa], then you, then her, then me. Yeah, it's a lot to process. Would you like a sedative?

Spencer: Like mother, like daughter. [Mary] pretended to be Jessica to sleep with my father and now you're pretending to be me to sleep with Toby.

Alex: If you love me, then shoot me.

Mary: I took a lover in Peru.

Spencer: You sold [Alex]?
Mary: The money bought me a ticket out of Radley and Alex went to a wealthy couple in England. I thought that she would lead a Cinderella life.
Spencer: Have you read Grimms' fairy tales?
Mary: The irony hasn't been wasted on me.

Spencer: Are you okay?
Ezra: It's my wedding day and we're locked in some sort of do it yourself dungeon so no, I'm not okay.
Spencer: I meant your head.
Ezra: Sorry, sarcasm is my brain's self defense mechanism for whenever I'm about to be murdered.

Alex: I paid for [Jenna]'s surgery. She's still as blind as a bat.

Emily: Out of all the insane theories we've jumped to, Spencer having an evil twin has got to be the most insane.

Mary: You promised me you wouldn't hurt [Spencer].
Alex: I'm not going to hurt her. It will be painless.

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