S07.E15: Don't Be All, Like, Uncool

[shoegal]

Although neither LuAnn or Dorinda said that they heard Heather drop an F bomb around Ella, that was what they alluded to. I think both LuAnn and Dorinda were looking for a fight on camera with someone, anyone and Ramona opened the door with her blaming Heather for her using the F word and they pounced.  Ramona had never used that word before she met Heather because, as we all know, Ramona is as pure as the driven snow (and it appears that Dorinda thinks she is "pure" as well)! LOL gag LOL

 

Oh and we only hear Heather use the F bomb when she is angry/hurt/very upset. I don't remember her just using it in general conversation like Dorinda claimed she did.  JMO

If she is dropping fucks around her young children, maybe she should listen to LuAnn and Dorinda.

Heather does use it in casual conversation, such as Sonja drinking "like a fucking fish".

[shoegal]

Well, they said that Ella is going to grow up saying that word BECAUSE her mother says it....translation.......Heather says it in front of Ella.

Well, I guess when her eight year old daughter says to her across the dinner table "I'm not eating your fucking meatball!!!", she'll have no one to blame but herself.

[WireWrap]

Well, I guess when her eight year old daughter says to her across the dinner table "I'm not eating your fucking meatball!!!", she'll have no one to blame but herself.

LOL, I don't think Heather would confuse Ella with Bethenny! The few times we have seen Heather with her children, there have been zero signs that she swears in front of them and I am sure Bravo would show it had it happened just like they did with Aviva.

 

LuAnn/Dorinda claimed that every other word Heather says is F, that she drops strings of them regularly, which Heather called bull on. We hear Dorinda say "shit" all the time and LuAnn says that and "bitch" on a regular basis, both of these words are swear words and they have been beeped as much as Heather. The 1 that uses the F bomb the most is Bethenny but I highly doubt that either LuAnn or Dorinda, even drunk, have the balls to call Bethenny out on it. LOL

[shoegal]

LOL, I don't think Heather would confuse Ella with Bethenny! The few times we have seen Heather with her children, there have been zero signs that she swears in front of them and I am sure Bravo would show it had it happened just like they did with Aviva.

 

Well, Dorinda and LuAnn have seen her with her kids, maybe the Bravo cameras haven't captured it, but it seems like they sure have. Poor Ella, I wonder how her fucking teachers like that? I hope she doesn't have a problem getting fucking play dates, I'm sure the other fucking moms just fucking love that.

[Diane Mars]

Srsly, who gives a fuck of who say the "eff" word ? Really ?

 

For my part I curse like a sailor, but, when needed, I can cope with a Royal....

 

What's worst ? Cursing or lying regarding of who you are ?

 

I can't stand that hypocrisy ! it's so childish and vain !

[imjagain]

Srsly, who gives a fuck of who say the "eff" word ? Really ?

For my part I curse like a sailor, but, when needed, I can cope with a Royal....

What's worst ? Cursing or lying regarding of who you are ?

I can't stand that hypocrisy ! it's so childish and vain !

Amen!

Can I say that even if I'm not religious? Oh well, fuck it. Amen!

Edited July 9, 2015 by imjagain

[WireWrap]

Well, Dorinda and LuAnn have seen her with her kids, maybe the Bravo cameras haven't captured it, but it seems like they sure have. Poor Ella, I wonder how her fucking teachers like that? I hope she doesn't have a problem getting fucking play dates, I'm sure the other fucking moms just fucking love that.

As Judge Judy says, "even if your tongue came notarized, I wouldn't believe you"  (or something like that), I do not believe LuAnn or Dorinda. IMO, they were looking for a fight ON camera and seized upon Heather's swearing because of Ramona. Oh, and I guess that LuAnn says the N word all the time as Victoria has used it as well as the F bomb and Hannah uses the F bomb so I guess Dorinda uses it all the time too! LOL

[shoegal]

As Judge Judy says, "even if your tongue came notarized, I wouldn't believe you" (or something like that), I do not believe LuAnn or Dorinda. IMO, they were looking for a fight ON camera and seized upon Heather's swearing because of Ramona. Oh, and I guess that LuAnn says the N word all the time as Victoria has used it as well as the F bomb and Hannah uses the F bomb so I guess Dorinda uses it all the time too! LOL

Well, then they weren't saying she was a bad mom, because she doesn't cuss in front of her kid! LOL Problem solved.

Edited July 9, 2015 by shoegal

[imjagain]

NM.

Edited July 9, 2015 by imjagain

[motorcitymom65]

Heather felt like she was being judged. I can see no other way around that fact, and she was being judged. They didn't have to call her a bad person or a bad mother directly; but they were judging her behavior as undesirable.  Lu flat out said Heather wouldn't want her daughter to talk the way that Heather does, which means that Heather is wrong to do it. People don't like to be judged. They especially don't like it when 3 harpies are judging them for behavior they themselves embrace. 

 

Imagine if the conversation was about casual sex. Then imagine if Heather had said to Lu "do you want Victoria to fuck a random pirate dude while she is in a committed, loving relationship and there are cameras around to document the event"? Do you want her to do something like that? My mother would be so embarrassed if she ever heard that I had done something like that."

 

They wouldn't have to say that Lu was wrong for setting such an example for her daughter but the implication would be clear that she had. Lu would not have liked it and she would have fought back hard that her behavior had nothing to do with her daughter, and that no one had the right to judge her. 

[WireWrap]

Well, then they weren't saying she was a bad mom, because she doesn't cuss in front of her kid! LOL Problem solved.

Ahhh, NO, both LuAnn and Dorinda were telling Heather she was a bad mom/daughter but it was/is a lie on their part, not Heathers! LOL

Edited July 9, 2015 by WireWrap

[shoegal]

Heather felt like she was being judged. I can see no other way around that fact, and she was being judged. They didn't have to call her a bad person or a bad mother directly; but they were judging her behavior as undesirable. Lu flat out said Heather wouldn't want her daughter to talk the way that Heather does, which means that Heather is wrong to do it. People don't like to be judged. They especially don't like it when 3 harpies are judging them for behavior they themselves embrace.

I agree, she was being judged....on her own behavior. Not on her parenting or whether she is a good or bad daughter.

Personally, I think LuAnn and Dorinda were being fucking stupid, haughty and hypocritical. I agreed with Heather on that part.

Ahhh, NO, both LuAnn and Dorinda were telling Heather she was a bad mom/daughter but it was/is a lie on their part, not Heathers! LOL

So they were lying about her behavior and judging her on their made up version? That is way too much of a stretch for me to make.

ETA: I think this now belongs in the episode thread

Edited July 9, 2015 by shoegal

[WireWrap]

I agree, she was being judged....on her own behavior. Not on her parenting or whether she is a good or bad daughter.

Personally, I think LuAnna and Dorinda were being fucking stupid, haughty and hypocritical. I agreed with Heather.

If she were being "judged" by LuAnn and Dorinda on her use of the F word only, then they had zero reason and no excuse to bring Ella into the conversation, none. IMO. They went down that road because they were trying to hurt Heather where it would hurt her and anger her the most, her children. Notice that they said nothing about her swearing in front of Jax, LuAnn refers to her "children", not to just her "daughter"! Why? IMO, they knew they would get blasted by viewers because of his health problems. . LuAnn and Dorinda may have been drunk but they are not THAT stupid! LOL  And when she, Heather, didn't fall for the "daughter" bait, they switched to the "parenting" bait. They were looking to fight on camera for more camera/face time and Ramona gave them the subject/target  and the 2 drunk fools ran with it IMO.

Edited July 9, 2015 by WireWrap

[Crikey]

Well, Dorinda and LuAnn have seen her with her kids, maybe the Bravo cameras haven't captured it, but it seems like they sure have. Poor Ella, I wonder how her fucking teachers like that? I hope she doesn't have a problem getting fucking play dates, I'm sure the other fucking moms just fucking love that.

I missed the scenes with Heather swearing in front of her child. 

 

If one goes only by what is actually said then it seems fair that one should  only go by what is actually shown to us, also.

 

The goal posts, the goal posts...... making me dizzy.

[Crikey]

I use darn, dang, crap, hell and other words but I leave the F-word for it's proper place.  ;)

My gf who drops f-bombs everywhere once asked why I don't use the F-word so I told her.  She then told her bf

"Crikey says F only when she is F-ing."   Mr. Crikey doesn't complain  ;) 

[shoegal]

If she were being "judged" by LuAnn and Dorinda on her use of the F word only, then they had zero reason and no excuse to bring Ella into the conversation, none. IMO. They went down that road because they were trying to hurt Heather where it would hurt her and anger her the most, her children. Notice that they said nothing about her swearing in front of Jax, jLuAnn refers to her "children", not to just her "daughter"! Why? IMO, they knew they would get blasted by viewers because of his health problems. . LuAnn and Dorinda may have been drunk but they are not THAT stupid! LOL  And when she, Heather, didn't fall for the "daughter" bait, they switched to the "parenting" bait. They were looking to fight on camera for more camera/face time and Ramona gave them the subject/target  and the 2 drunk fools ran with it IMO.

Responding in the episode thread.

[zoeysmom]

Well when LuAnn said "you want to teach your daughter (drunken pause) to be elegant," I almost thought Luman was going to break out into song with, "and elegance is learned, my friend."  I think when these women are speaking they are avoiding the fourth wall situation and say things like "in front of" as oppose to "seeing you on TV".  Most of them have had questionable drunken behavior as well as bad language.

 

If Heather felt judged she should express that feeling.  She should have said, "I feel you are insulting me as a mother," instead she went into the thing about her mother and neither the drunks or most people could follow that thought process.  I never thought they were questioning her ability as a parent.  When Kelly decided to do Playboy LuAnn indicated it might have an effect on her daughters.  Kelly blew her off because she knew their father would be tasteful about it. Huh? As far as LuAnn's daughter-she committed those acts as a minor so I do think it is unfair to throw that in her face.  I just remember the art show of Victoria's featuring all the Kush references and LuAnn seemingly unaware or unconcerned of the drug reference.  None of the other RH brought it up.

[Rhetorica]

I find it fucking hilarious that our fucking conversation is lasting fucking longer than the fucking fight the mother fuckers who started it had.

[WireWrap]

Well when LuAnn said "you want to teach your daughter (drunken pause) to be elegant," I almost thought Luman was going to break out into song with, "and elegance is learned, my friend."  I think when these women are speaking they are avoiding the fourth wall situation and say things like "in front of" as oppose to "seeing you on TV".  Most of them have had questionable drunken behavior as well as bad language.

 

If Heather felt judged she should express that feeling.  She should have said, "I feel you are insulting me as a mother," instead she went into the thing about her mother and neither the drunks or most people could follow that thought process.  I never thought they were questioning her ability as a parent.  When Kelly decided to do Playboy LuAnn indicated it might have an effect on her daughters.  Kelly blew her off because she knew their father would be tasteful about it. Huh? As far as LuAnn's daughter-she committed those acts as a minor so I do think it is unfair to throw that in her face.  I just remember the art show of Victoria's featuring all the Kush references and LuAnn seemingly unaware or unconcerned of the drug reference.  None of the other RH brought it up.

I beg to differ but Heather DID tell them she was "feeling insulted" and she told them to "STOP", which caused LuAnn back off at that point but Dorinda ramped it up. Heather never mentioned Victoria, in any way or the stuff she, V, said, she only mentioned adult Hannah who she knows and who we have seen/heard bleeped on camera.

[Gam2]

I won't mention my age but I've managed to live my entire life without saying the word "f...". I have said shit, hell, damn. And my children heard me say those words upon occasion. But my grown children have never said that word around me (or their children with one exception which we had a come to Jesus conversation about it; it never happened again) and will never will. They know it offends me. I think it's about respect, knowing how to express yourself without using cuss words and setting a good example for your children. Just because Heather's mom didn't chastise her for using that vulgar language doesn't mean it's acceptable to use around other children or other adults. Apparently, she spent too much time around PDiddy or whatever he's calling himself these days. Those are not people we should, in any way, try to emulate no matter how impressed Heather appears to be with those nasty people. Our standards of behavior, language and decorum have gone to hell in a hand basket. 

[WireWrap]

I won't mention my age but I've managed to live my entire life without saying the word "f...". I have said shit, hell, damn. And my children heard me say those words upon occasion. But my grown children have never said that word around me (or their children with one exception which we had a come to Jesus conversation about it; it never happened again) and will never will. They know it offends me. I think it's about respect, knowing how to express yourself without using cuss words and setting a good example for your children. Just because Heather's mom didn't chastise her for using that vulgar language doesn't mean it's acceptable to use around other children or other adults. Apparently, she spent too much time around PDiddy or whatever he's calling himself these days. Those are not people we should, in any way, try to emulate no matter how impressed Heather appears to be with those nasty people. Our standards of behavior, language and decorum have gone to hell in a hand basket. 

My mother never said it that I heard and I only use it when I want to kill someone! LOL That said, ALL of the HWs on ALL of the HW shows have said it on camera and more than once. It was/is hypocritical of Ramona, LuAnn and Dorinda to scold/lecture/berate/judge Heather on her use of the word. A swear word is a swear word, whether it is hell, shit, dam, bastard, bitch or F word, they are all still swear words. Heather does not drop the F bomb in every sentence or even in every conversation but Dorinda seems to work at least 1 "shit" into most conversations! LOL

Edited July 9, 2015 by WireWrap

[motorcitymom65]

I won't mention my age but I've managed to live my entire life without saying the word "f...". I have said shit, hell, damn. And my children heard me say those words upon occasion. But my grown children have never said that word around me (or their children with one exception which we had a come to Jesus conversation about it; it never happened again) and will never will. They know it offends me. I think it's about respect, knowing how to express yourself without using cuss words and setting a good example for your children. Just because Heather's mom didn't chastise her for using that vulgar language doesn't mean it's acceptable to use around other children or other adults. Apparently, she spent too much time around PDiddy or whatever he's calling himself these days. Those are not people we should, in any way, try to emulate no matter how impressed Heather appears to be with those nasty people. Our standards of behavior, language and decorum have gone to hell in a hand basket. 

I totally respect your decision to not use it. Lots of people don't. I use it like it's my job. It's my all time favorite word, and I've never worked for, met, or brushed up against P Diddy. I think the thing about using "bad" language is to respect your audience. I would have never in a million years used it in front of any of my grandparents because it literally would have hurt their soul to hear me curse in any manner. They were aware, however, of my love for it, because I'm not one to pretend to be something that I'm not. I also have a few friends who are deeply religious, and offended by any profanity. I would never dream of using a word that would offend them.  I think that is what Heather was saying. These girls curse all the time as well (we heard Ramona say to Carole "well you're fucking a 28 year old, and the interesting thing is that Lu used that exact same term when she was talking to Carole about Adam). They curse so they have zero business telling her anything.

 

And it's just my opinion. but just because someone doesn't like the word "fuck", but is OK with "shit", I don't worry about offending them at all with whatever I say. If they are up for using bad language, whatever they consider that to be, then they had better be up for me using mine. 

Edited July 9, 2015 by motorcitymom65

[jimene79]

I won't mention my age but I've managed to live my entire life without saying the word "f...". I have said shit, hell, damn. And my children heard me say those words upon occasion. But my grown children have never said that word around me (or their children with one exception which we had a come to Jesus conversation about it; it never happened again) and will never will. They know it offends me. I think it's about respect, knowing how to express yourself without using cuss words and setting a good example for your children. Just because Heather's mom didn't chastise her for using that vulgar language doesn't mean it's acceptable to use around other children or other adults. Apparently, she spent too much time around PDiddy or whatever he's calling himself these days. Those are not people we should, in any way, try to emulate no matter how impressed Heather appears to be with those nasty people. Our standards of behavior, language and decorum have gone to hell in a hand basket. 

Standards of behavior, language, and decorum are always changing.  Vulgar behavior used to be showing your ankles.  I do agree people should always strive to be respectful to each other but superficial things like curse words don't automatically mean disrespect (although they can).  I don;t swear all that much but it really doesn't bother me when people swear like Heather does.  It's all about intent and content to me.  And I certainly don't see a difference between the f-word and s-word. 

[charming]

So in the preview clip Bethenny states how wrong it is for Ramona to behave like she's not dating anyone and she needs to just own that. While Bethenny herself has spent the entire season crying about how alone she is when she had a maybe rapist boyfriend the entire time. One hypocrite talking about another. Gotta love it.

[Crikey]

Standards of behavior, language, and decorum are always changing.  Vulgar behavior used to be showing your ankles.  I do agree people should always strive to be respectful to each other but superficial things like curse words don't automatically mean disrespect (although they can).  I don;t swear all that much but it really doesn't bother me when people swear like Heather does.  It's all about intent and content to me.  And I certainly don't see a difference between the f-word and s-word. 

Agree.

My Grandmother would have considered  "Hell in a handbasket"  akin to swearing/vulgarity.

[BettyPoz]

I missed the scenes with Heather swearing in front of her child. 

 

If one goes only by what is actually said then it seems fair that one should  only go by what is actually shown to us, also.

 

The goal posts, the goal posts...... making me dizzy.

You and your fucking goal posts!  LOL - it had to be said.....I know exactly what you mean.  Imply...don't imply...And for the record, why are we still having this fucking argument!!

[imjagain]

Maybe the discussion should be about the hypocritical attitude of Lu, Dorinda and Ramona, instead of the word fuck.

I'm sure that is what bothered Heather, I know that is what annoyed me about the conversation.

Edited July 11, 2015 by imjagain

[Crikey]

You and your fucking goal posts!  LOL - it had to be said.....I know exactly what you mean.  Imply...don't imply...And for the record, why are we still having this fucking argument!!

LOL

Because we are gosh-darn, dang, fricking sons of benches?   (insert f-word at will)  lol

 

Reminds me of a story about Winston Churchill when he attended a luncheon while on a lecture tour of America and was served a buffet lunch of cold chicken.

"May I have some breast?" he asked his hostess.

"Mr Churchill," she replied, "In this country we ask for white meat or dark meat."

The following day Churchill sent her an orchid, with the message: "I would be obliged if you would pin this on your white meat."

[AnnaMayWong]

No curse, cuss verbiage is any less profane than the other--yes, this incudes SHIT, DAMN, ASS, and any numerous other salty bits of language. Since ALL kinds of people have exercised usage of the aforementioned, I fail to understand "P Diddy's" relevance in the use of profanity, and I certainly can not attest to any nastiness on his part. I am, however, pleased that his parenting included college education for his children which is more than can be said for most of the 'Ho'wives.

☆☆Heather does not use profanity any more often or intensely than her co-workers. Also, her language is not any more vulgar than the others simply because one prefers/chooses one profane word over another.☆☆

Edited July 10, 2015 by BookElitist

[JennyMominFL]

I won't mention my age but I've managed to live my entire life without saying the word "f...". I have said shit, hell, damn. And my children heard me say those words upon occasion. But my grown children have never said that word around me (or their children with one exception which we had a come to Jesus conversation about it; it never happened again) and will never will. They know it offends me. I think it's about respect, knowing how to express yourself without using cuss words and setting a good example for your children. Just because Heather's mom didn't chastise her for using that vulgar language doesn't mean it's acceptable to use around other children or other adults. Apparently, she spent too much time around PDiddy or whatever he's calling himself these days. Those are not people we should, in any way, try to emulate no matter how impressed Heather appears to be with those nasty people. Our standards of behavior, language and decorum have gone to hell in a hand basket. 

Well, what would you do if you visited the town of Fucking Austria? 

Edited July 10, 2015 by JennyMominFL

[zoeysmom]

Standards of behavior, language, and decorum are always changing.  Vulgar behavior used to be showing your ankles.  I do agree people should always strive to be respectful to each other but superficial things like curse words don't automatically mean disrespect (although they can).  I don;t swear all that much but it really doesn't bother me when people swear like Heather does.  It's all about intent and content to me.  And I certainly don't see a difference between the f-word and s-word. 

I look at this way . . if you are on a TV show and your words have to be beeped you have crossed the base standards of decency.  If you wear clothes that are prone to malfunction and your scenes have to be blurred you have probably embarrassed minor children.  Absolutely Heather or anyone else's right to offend. 

 

Just once I would like to see one hour of no beeps in a RH's show.  I am not a prude.  I know they can do it because they go WWHL and they can go half an hour.  It should be a goal. 

[WireWrap]

I look at this way . . if you are on a TV show and your words have to be beeped you have crossed the base standards of decency.  If you wear clothes that are prone to malfunction and your scenes have to be blurred you have probably embarrassed minor children.  Absolutely Heather or anyone else's right to offend. 

 

Just once I would like to see one hour of no beeps in a RH's show.  I am not a prude.  I know they can do it because they go WWHL and they can go half an hour.  It should be a goal. 

LOL, that's not going to happen, especially if the producers have any say so. I hear HWs getting bleeped on WWHL as well, not to the degree they have to bleep Brandi/Tamra but they still get bleeped. AND not all swear words get bleeped now days but that doesn't make them any less a swear/cuss word. LOL

 

An example, Heather Dubrow, OC, rarely swears, I can't remember hearing her swear and she gets slammed as being or acting like a snob because she has great language skills. JS

Edited July 10, 2015 by WireWrap

[Happycatisfine]

So in the preview clip Bethenny states how wrong it is for Ramona to behave like she's not dating anyone and she needs to just own that. While Bethenny herself has spent the entire season crying about how alone she is when she had a maybe rapist boyfriend the entire time. One hypocrite talking about another. Gotta love it.

What is this?  I've read several posts on the episode forums that mention Bethany dating someone, but WTF?

[WireWrap]

What is this?  I've read several posts on the episode forums that mention Bethany dating someone, but WTF?

Her then BF was accused of rape when he was in college. He was never charged but he was kicked out of school (I think). They were living together for the first couple of months during filming even though she claimed she had no BF or apartment to live in at the time. It was reported that he did not want to appear on film and that during her BD party, he was waiting downstairs at another BD party that Bravo was not allowed to film (there were photos showing him at that second/real party).

 

ETA... Here are some links....

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2533430/Bethenny-Frankels-new-boyfriend-expelled-college-frat-house-rape-claim.html

 

Third photo down........ http://www.eonline.com/news/595939/inside-bethenny-frankel-s-birthday-bash-reality-star-parties-will-rhony-castmates-and-major-drama-goes-down

Edited July 10, 2015 by WireWrap

[Rhetorica]

I won't mention my age but I've managed to live my entire life without saying the word "f...". I have said shit, hell, damn. And my children heard me say those words upon occasion. But my grown children have never said that word around me (or their children with one exception which we had a come to Jesus conversation about it; it never happened again) and will never will. They know it offends me. I think it's about respect, knowing how to express yourself without using cuss words and setting a good example for your children. Just because Heather's mom didn't chastise her for using that vulgar language doesn't mean it's acceptable to use around other children or other adults. Apparently, she spent too much time around PDiddy or whatever he's calling himself these days. Those are not people we should, in any way, try to emulate no matter how impressed Heather appears to be with those nasty people. Our standards of behavior, language and decorum have gone to hell in a hand basket.

I won't mention my age either, but I am older than dirt. I'm happy for you that your children respect your wishes, even as adults. I'm lucky with that too and they actually enjoy my company. I admit, I do let loose an F word or two on occasion but only when warranted. And yes, there are times when it's warranted. I don't think we can fault Heather's mother for her language. Children become adults and make their own way. I'm also curious to know what you mean by those nasty people who you think Heather is emulating.

[Grneyedldy]

I think this fucking horse has been beaten to fucking death. :-)

[Crikey]

Well, what would you do if you visiting the town of Fucking Austria? 

I would feel obligated to do as the town's name suggested  :)  When in Rome........ lol

I think this fucking horse has been beaten to fucking death. :-)

Paddles, Nurse, STAT!  Stand f'ing clear!   lol

Edited July 10, 2015 by Crikey

[ButterQueen]

Well, I guess when her eight year old daughter says to her across the dinner table "I'm not eating your fucking meatball!!!", she'll have no one to blame but herself.

Despite the drunken duo's feeble attempts, I do not believe for a second that Heather uses the F bomb in front of her children.

[zoeysmom]

Despite the drunken duo's feeble attempts, I do not believe for a second that Heather uses the F bomb in front of her children.

All I can remember is Carlton of RHOBH, who was quite proud of her f bombs in front of her kids.  Since then, for me all bets are off for these women and what they do in front of their children or nannies or in front of a camera. 

[WireWrap]

All I can remember is Carlton of RHOBH, who was quite proud of her f bombs in front of her kids.  Since then, for me all bets are off for these women and what they do in front of their children or nannies or in front of a camera. 

True BUT Carlton, like Brandi were bleeped every couple of sentences that came out of their mouths most of the time they were on camera. That is not true of Heather at all.  JMO

[JennyMominFL]

I was in the Marines. I drop the occasional F bomb.. My kids are in their 20's though. I was the guardian for a single dad who was in the Navy. He would come back from a 6 month float swearing, well, like a sailor. He would get home, hug his 5 year old daugher and say, I missed you so F'in much. How the F are you. It's so good to be F'ing home. It would take him a few days to get out of swear mode.

[Gam2]

Apparently  I ignited a discussion about decorum and language with my post. Perhaps I should have explained that I'm in my sixties, was reared in a long time military family from the South. I never said a cuss word in front of my children until they were of college age when they'd heard much worse, I'm sure. I never heard a cuss word from my mother or my dad (until the 8th grade when my dad said "Damn" in front of my 2 sister and I. Boy, did he get a look from my mom.) I guess my point was that this kind of language and behavior isn't elevating any of us. I understand that times change and people adapt to new mores and behavior. That's a good thing in my opinion. But at some point, I think we have to take a good look at what's acceptable in polite society (if there is such a thing anymore) and what we're teaching our children. Using these words in public places around other people who might be offended isn't okay. I do agree with Heather's point of view. If you use these words and act like this in your real life, own it. Don't act like you're above everyone else on camera and then be a real jerk in your private life. I hope this has explained my previous post. If not, you're entitled to your opinion and I'm entitled to mine. 

[Deputy Deputy CoS]

I was in the Marines. I drop the occasional F bomb.. My kids are in their 20's though. I was the guardian for a single dad who was in the Navy. He would come back from a 6 month float swearing, well, like a sailor. He would get home, hug his 5 year old daugher and say, I missed you so F'in much. How the F are you. It's so good to be F'ing home. It would take him a few days to get out of swear mode.

The poor child lol.

The way I see it, while living by example is good parenting, sometimes parents insisting to their children to "do as I say" is also good parenting. Children has to know they are not adults and therefore can't do and say things adults do.

It is actually forward thinking, IMO, for parents to minimally use curse word in front of kids as long as they explain to them why they shouldn't use them. It is better than pretending those words words don't exist.

Mother steps on a toy and fuck comes flying out? So fucking what? If your child is within earshot, wiggle that finger in their face and warn them to never, ever utter that word. Because, guess what? As the adult and desciplirian, you have the authority to do so! LOL

No really, my parents played songs with bad words in them around us when we were kids and we knew which part to be silent when we sang along. I don't remeber anyone ever telling us it was unacceptable to use those words in any capacity. They must have but it just was.

They allowed us to take sips from their wine glasses or give us our own (sweet for me! ) on special occasions and none of us are drunks. Go figure.

My parents and the adults in our lives, at an early age introduced us to the things that could make us undesirable members of society, but taught how to handle them in a way that gave us control. I believe I'm a light drinker because I never had the curiosity for alcohol some of my friends did during our teens because my parents took the curiosity right out of the equation.

To bring it back to the conversation, Heather might be using the same tactic with her own kids. This is what mommy says and does. However you can't do as mommy does because you are kids . You also don't have the displeasure of dealing with fucking assholes. Perfect parenting IMO.

[Happycatisfine]

Apparently  I ignited a discussion about decorum and language with my post. Perhaps I should have explained that I'm in my sixties, was reared in a long time military family from the South. I never said a cuss word in front of my children until they were of college age when they'd heard much worse, I'm sure. I never heard a cuss word from my mother or my dad (until the 8th grade when my dad said "Damn" in front of my 2 sister and I. Boy, did he get a look from my mom.) I guess my point was that this kind of language and behavior isn't elevating any of us. I understand that times change and people adapt to new mores and behavior. That's a good thing in my opinion. But at some point, I think we have to take a good look at what's acceptable in polite society (if there is such a thing anymore) and what we're teaching our children. Using these words in public places around other people who might be offended isn't okay. I do agree with Heather's point of view. If you use these words and act like this in your real life, own it. Don't act like you're above everyone else on camera and then be a real jerk in your private life. I hope this has explained my previous post. If not, you're entitled to your opinion and I'm entitled to mine. 

I was raised pretty much the same way with regard to "vulgar" language.  My father enlisted in the Army at 17, was awarded the Purple Heart for his service in WWII, was not a college grad although he wanted to be but had kids (7 total) so this is not a "class" thing; neither he nor my mother ever swore in front of us, and my father always told us that swearing is the result of basically lazy vocabulary.  Did he swear at the age of 18 on the frozen fields of Germany or the hellishly-hot sands of Africa?  Pretty sure he did, but he did not bring it home, he gave us a high standard which I appreciate to this day in my professional life and day-to-day living.  I don't say "Fuck" at the grocery store, even though I may think it.  I live in an urban neighborhood, and I admit I want to slap the parents of children who have to listen to them spewing "fuck" "shit" "bitch" "asshole" and this is just at the daycare next to my house!

 

ETA: If I were being filmed, I would very carefully choose my words.  I can say "fuck this" all day in my own home, but I am not at work, which these women are.  And as we now know with Bethanny's "single" status, this is just a job, not real life.

Edited July 11, 2015 by Happycatisfine

[missy jo]

I think a poster on the thread for this week's episode said it best - Heather was talking about "code-switching" and the ability to tailor your language to your audience. I think she was exceedingly patient with all of them, especially after they brought up her daughter and especially after they continued to go at it after she said, "OK, this is the point where it's getting uncomfortable for me ..."

 

In the preview clip Bethenny states how wrong it is for Ramona to behave like she's not dating anyone and she needs to just own that. While Bethenny herself has spent the entire season crying about how alone she is when she had a maybe rapist boyfriend the entire time.

 

 

As a dedicated Bethenny-hater this season, I have many issues with her, but this is probably the biggest one. It's fine if your boyfriend does not want to film and does not want his home to be filmed. However, having your "arc" be that you have walls up and are alone (direct quote) while already having moved on romantically, should not have been allowed. Huge disservice to the viewers.

[Petunia13]

I was in the Marines. I drop the occasional F bomb.. My kids are in their 20's though. I was the guardian for a single dad who was in the Navy. He would come back from a 6 month float swearing, well, like a sailor. He would get home, hug his 5 year old daugher and say, I missed you so F'in much. How the F are you. It's so good to be F'ing home. It would take him a few days to get out of swear mode.

Ha too funny and a little cute in a Family Guy way.

I think actions speak louder than words. And I lovefreedom of speech and hate censorship. Most of speech IMHO is more verbose and excessive than required and extremely insincere.

I wanted to say I really enjoy your posts when I read them and thank you. Your remarks are always well considered and candid.

[SFoster21]

I think a poster on the thread for this week's episode said it best - Heather was talking about "code-switching" and the ability to tailor your language to your audience. I think she was exceedingly patient with all of them, especially after they brought up her daughter and especially after they continued to go at it after she said, "OK, this is the point where it's getting uncomfortable for me ..."

As a dedicated Bethenny-hater this season, I have many issues with her, but this is probably the biggest one. It's fine if your boyfriend does not want to film and does not want his home to be filmed. However, having your "arc" be that you have walls up and are alone (direct quote) while already having moved on romantically, should not have been allowed. Huge disservice to the viewers.

I don't feel "disserved." She's not with the guy now, so it's reality. She's not on the prowl like some others we could name. B gives full value; she's smart and funny and has interests beyond drinking. She carried Heather down the beach!

IMO.

[motorcitymom65]

I don't feel "disserved." She's not with the guy now, so it's reality. She's not on the prowl like some others we could name. B gives full value; she's smart and funny and has interests beyond drinking. She carried Heather down the beach!

IMO.

No, but she was with the guy then - during all of filming. They broke up after this show was all nice and edited (they broke up at the end of March, the show began the first week of April). It is clear they weren't showing the guy, not because he was no longer around, but because that wasn't to be the story. The point is that the narrative was that she was alone and sad. That she couldn't get close to "new people". It was just deceitful to the audience because she was really loving, touching and squeezing another and Bravo presented a very different narrative. Can anyone say that Beth's story would not have been completely different if we would have known she had a serious, long-term boyfriend? It would have changed almost everything. 

[shoegal]

No, but she was with the guy then - during all of filming. They broke up after this show was all nice and edited (they broke up at the end of March, the show began the first week of April). It is clear they weren't showing the guy, not because he was no longer around, but because that wasn't to be the story. The point is that the narrative was that she was alone and sad. That she couldn't get close to "new people". It was just deceitful to the audience because she was really loving, touching and squeezing another and Bravo presented a very different narrative. Can anyone say that Beth's story would not have been completely different if we would have known she had a serious, long-term boyfriend? It would have changed almost everything.

I don't feel like Bravo presented the narrative that Bethenny was "alone", she never lied about anything, whether or not she was dating anyone was never addressed one way or the other. I don't think it's a game changer. *shrugs*

[NewDigs]

But Bravo did present Bethy's own narrative which consisted of lots of, Oh poor me, I'm all alone, I'm homeless, The walls are up etc. ad nauseum. A disingenuous posture at best and probably, more rightly, an attempt at sympathy. And what looks now to be undeserved sympathy. Not that I really ever felt sorry for her cuz I did not.

Edited July 11, 2015 by NewDigs