Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[bilgistic]

I am 41 and I have several tattoos and purple hair underneath my "enhanced" dishwater blonde--just what I can get away with at work (come sit with me, @TattleTeeny). None of that affects how I do my job. In fact, I'm more ethical than most of the people with whom I work, as I've been stolen from, had promises broken and been told lies.

I just had a tattoo reworked/covered after one laser treatment (and I love the new tattoo!). Laser treatment hurts like a bitch--way worse than a tattoo. And the itching when it's healing--oh god, the itching! If I could've clawed off my arm, I would've. I'm getting another removed and possibly redone. Four more sessions. Not regret, really, but wanting improvement--repainting a canvas, if you will.

[Qoass]

I don't care for tattoos but I also find being "professional" to be wildly overrated.

[TattleTeeny]

Quote

And the itching when it's healing--oh god, the itching! 

Haha, sometimes the itching makes me believe that the people who say "you're gonna regret that" are at least somewhat right! I'll take the actual tattoo process over the healing process any day.

Edited July 26, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[Demented Daisy]

28 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

 

Quote

And the itching when it's healing--oh god, the itching! 

Haha, sometimes the itching makes me believe that the people who say "you're gonna regret that" are at least somewhat right! I'll take the actual tattoo process over the healing process any day.

 

I use witch hazel on mine during the healing process.  It really helps the itching.  Then I use aloe vera.  It's non-traditional, but it works for me.

[Blergh]

On 7/21/2016 at 9:05 AM, Quof said:

A friend moaned "But if I go back to school, I'll be 40 when I graduate." 

I asked "How old will you be if you didn't go back to school?"

A very valid point but the REAL question one should ask when considering going to back to school is how old do they think they'll be when they FINALLY pay off college loans. Somehow, having to pay off those loans past retirement age takes a bit of the shine out of attempting to fulfill a dream.

[TattleTeeny]

I'm our primary breadwinner--I cannot see fucking up all our shit because I have dreams of being some kind of investigator as opposed to a copy editor, haha! Plus, I really do value my downtime. BUT...

to all of you who are doing this, you go on with your bad selves! Kick ass!

[janestclair]

I don't mind tattoos, as long as they are well done and not an offensive. Like, not an ejaculating penis or a Nazi swastika or something.  I don't particularly like them on people's faces either, plus that must hurt like a bitch.  I would get a tattoo, but what design am I still going to like 20 years from now? I can't make that kind of commitment.  

[topanga]

2 hours ago, Blergh said:

A very valid point but the REAL question one should ask when considering going to back to school is how old do they think they'll be when they FINALLY pay off college loans. Somehow, having to pay off those loans past retirement age takes a bit of the shine out of attempting to fulfill a dream.

I know student loans are a huge burden on American society, but they pale in comparison to the financial impact of credit card loans. Some people say that they skip college because they don't want student loans, but I rarely hear people say that they'll stop shopping for clothes or buying things on eBay or Amazon.com because they don't want credit card debt. We should say that, but not many people do. 

[Quof]

Quote

I would get a tattoo, but what design am I still going to like 20 years from now? I can't make that kind of commitment.  

One of the many reasons I've opted against marriage.

[ABay]

Among the things that make student loan debt so bad is that there is no way to discharge it in bankruptcy , refinance it, or lower the interest rates as one can with other consumer loans. I went through credit counseling to pay off credit card debt about 15 years ago and I wish there was something similar for student loan debt. 

Edited July 26, 2016 by ABay

[bilgistic]

It definitely itches when a tattoo is healing, but I was referring to the laser treatment area. I was unclear. Post-laser treatment itching is tattoo itching x100. SO BAD. The lasering pain is nothing compared to the itch about a week later. I can compare it only slightly to the terrible eczema I had as a child. I "grew out" of about 65% of it.

[Petunia13]

Is it common to laser off tattoos? 

I got mine knowing ok this is forever now. I think they're tolerable both of my artists were on tv - one was on la ink so it's skilled enough shit. And the images aren't regretful like REM appreciation tattoo or bf name. 

[bilgistic]

What's wrong with an R.E.M. tattoo? They were my favorite band for a long time.

I'm kidding about the tattoo part.

Laser tattoo removal is becoming way more common. I don't have any stats or anything, but as tattoos have become more popular and arguably more acceptable, more (and younger) people are getting them, which naturally means mistakes and regret.

I was fine with the one I just had covered (lightened with one laser treatment session first) until an artist different than the one who had tattooed the piece said it wasn't "a good tattoo" with a screwy face after he had done a different one for me. I had asked him about touching up the piece in question. After he said that, it's all I could think about. Note to artists: don't say shitty things to your clients. I just had the reworking/coverup (same concept) done by a talented young woman, and it was worth it.

The second piece I'm having lasered was just not the best decision. I wasn't in the best place emotionally when I got it (from the same "not a good tattoo" artist, by the way--never again, plus he moved away), and while I could leave it, it doesn't honor the experience associated, so I'm having it removed and redone elsewhere, properly and while in a good mindset.

I have five others that are most likely with me for life, particularly the large lower back piece from my early 20s. My first tattoo is 21-22 years old.

Edited July 27, 2016 by bilgistic

[topanga]

18 hours ago, ABay said:

Among the things that make student loan debt so bad is that there is no way to discharge it in bankruptcy , refinance it, or lower the interest rates as one can with other consumer loans. I went through credit counseling to pay off credit card debt about 15 years ago and I wish there was something similar for student loan debt. 

But my student loan interest rates are very low, and I was able to consolidate them. I went to college and grad school in the '90s. Things might have changed since then. 

--For example, it still amazes me that some students can't even get student loans. I never would have made it through college without them. Lord knows, my parents couldn't pony up any money. 

[Demented Daisy]

In my experience (my daughter is about to enter her third year at a state-supported university), student loans have evolved to convince kids to attend the best college that accepts them, not the best college they can afford.

Speaking of my daughter, my current pet peeve is people who can't accept others the way they are.  We're a military family and my daughter spent most of her formative years (3-15) in Europe.  My parents keep trying to make her into an "All-American, Southern girl".  She's happy, why can't they just love her the way she is?  Ugh.

[TattleTeeny]

I have one that I would have thought twice about had Then Me known Now Me (it's not the tattoo so much as the placement), but none of mine make me feel like I need to go to any extreme measure to undo it--though I do not  at all not discourage anyone who feels that way! I mean, removal is really the same exact sentiment as getting a tattoo if you think about it, just in reverse; you want something on your body to be a certain way and you are the judge of just how important it is to make it so. 

I've had coverups, not because the tattoos were regrettable but because I was adding more stuff and because I had one that was over 20 years old, aging, and probably not worth simply having my guy reproduce it exactly. It was my second one ever and I loved it but...it was time (how dramatic!). The fact that I can still see little tiny bits of it makes me kind of happy. I've also gotten some touchups (not too many, and usually in places with less color; my pale skin is apparently my tattooist's dream--makes his work always look brand new). just to make them "pop" again after years pass. 

Edited July 27, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[ABay]

Interest rates on student loans used to be a lot lower. In the 80s, I think they were around 3-4%. In the mid- to late 90s, they were 6-7+% and consolidating didn't significantly reduce them. The rate is low compared to credit cards, but enough to increase the total owed a lot if you're in a low-paying job and need to extend the pay-back schedule to 30 years in order to make the monthly payments, or need to take a deferment or forebearance for family or other reasons.

[ABay]

Revisiting one of the peeviest of my peeves: LOUD people. Indoor voices, jackasses. INDOOR VOICES. Sweet jesus, is the entire population under 25 DEAF? It's the aural equivalent of selfies and documenting every change in mood on FaceBook--they seem to think they only exist if they're attracting attention. In closing, STFU.

[topanga]

17 minutes ago, Demented Daisy said:

In my experience (my daughter is about to enter her third year at a state-supported university), student loans have evolved to convince kids to attend the best college that accepts them, not the best college they can afford.

Speaking of my daughter, my current pet peeve is people who can't accept others the way they are.  We're a military family and my daughter spent most of her formative years (3-15) in Europe.  My parents keep trying to make her into an "All-American, Southern girl".  She's happy, why can't they just love her the way she is?  Ugh.

State universities do provide a great education, and please believe me that I'm not thumbing up my nose at them. But I have to say that if my son gets accepted to an Ivy League university along side a state school, he will definitely be going to the Ivy League--and taking out student loans. I know that an Ivy League school is, in many ways, just an expensive name, but I've lived long enough to know that a name can open doors when it comes to getting a job or applying for grad schools. 

I have a friend, a college professor, whose daughter recently graduated from high school. She was accepted to several 4-year universities, and many of them were state schools with modest tuition. I talked to her recently about her daughter's future plans, and she mentioned that her daughter will be living at home and attending a local community college in the fall because it's the cheapest option. And then her daughter will transfer her credits to a four-year college. But that doesn't make sense to me for several reasons. This professor and I are the same age, and we know many of the same people. And in my (our) experience:

• Many people (I'm not saying all) who attend community colleges either don't finish college or never end up making the transition to a four-year university.
• Living at home instead of in a dorm, while cheaper, robs a student of the complete college experience, especially freshman year. 
• This professor and her husband make more money than my family does, and they constantly brag about not having any debt, so unless she is lying to me about her family's finances, I doubt that they wouldn't be able to afford a state school for their daughter. Especially if the daughter is getting student loans -- which she has to pay back herself. 

 

And I completely agree with you about your daughter. I wonder if your parents feel your daughter is somehow too smart or too worldly for them now. In other words, maybe they're intimidated by the fact that she's a world traveler, and it makes them feel inadequate. Which is why they long for her to be an "All American, Southern girl," something they're familiar with. 

[Demented Daisy]

12 minutes ago, topanga said:

But I have to say that if my son gets accepted to an Ivy League university along side a state school, he will definitely be going to the Ivy League--and taking out student loans.

And if he doesn't want to do that?

My daughter was accepted to a private art school -- at 4x her current tuition.  She decided that graduating without student loan debt was more important to her than being able to say, "I got a degree from so-and-so university."  

15 minutes ago, topanga said:

Many people (I'm not saying all) who attend community colleges either don't finish college or never end up making the transition to a four-year university.

I was accepted to Princeton (in addition to other universities, both state-supported and private) but ultimately decided to attend a local community college instead.  There I met my future husband.  We've been married for over 20 years and have an incredible daughter.  He has a degree in psychology and is currently working on his Master's degree while remaining active duty military.  I decided, years ago, that being a military spouse and stay-at-home mom was more important than returning to college.  Perhaps I will when my husband retires, but since I still don't know what I want to study, I am in no hurry.

I'm not trying to start an argument, nor did I take offense.  I just wanted to offer a counterpoint.  Great things can come out of a community college (or even no college)!

[TattleTeeny]

While I am not the best example (three schools and no degree even though I loved college), I can say that my visual-arts education at a community school (the the first of the three that I attended) rivaled that of the fancy-pants art school I attended afterward! For a whole lot less dough, I got a whole lot more attention and opportunities from equally lauded teachers. While the art school was great about treating us like special little alternative snowflakes (haha, we didn't even have to make our own schedules because an advisor did it for us), it also made us retake the very same foundation classes we'd completed at other "inferior" schools...and, no, they were not one bit different just because they were held at a fine-arts academy. Too bad silly me was wooed by the idea of going to a big-city art school ASAP instead of finishing that one more semester I had at the community school! At least I'd have an associate's degree now instead of a big fat nothin'!

Edited July 27, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[topanga]

5 minutes ago, Demented Daisy said:

And if he doesn't want to do that?

My daughter was accepted to a private art school -- at 4x her current tuition.  She decided that graduating without student loan debt was more important to her than being able to say, "I got a degree from so-and-so university."  

I was accepted to Princeton (in addition to other universities, both state-supported and private) but ultimately decided to attend a local community college instead.  There I met my future husband.  We've been married for over 20 years and have an incredible daughter.  He has a degree in psychology and is currently working on his Master's degree while remaining active duty military.  I decided, years ago, that being a military spouse and stay-at-home mom was more important than returning to college.  Perhaps I will when my husband retires, but since I still don't know what I want to study, I am in no hurry.

I'm not trying to start an argument, nor did I take offense.  I just wanted to offer a counterpoint.  Great things can come out of a community college (or even no college)!

Thanks for this post. I certainly wasn't trying to offend anyone from a community college or state-sponsored university. BTW, I didn't go to an Ivy League for college.

And Ha! You sound like my son. He goes to a public magnet school, and he's really smart, but he's also 100% into sports. He wants to go to a Big Sports School for college (like Texas, Ohio State, etc) on some kind of sports scholarship. I joke with him (but I'm serious) that he has to apply to Harvard and Penn along with any other schools he's considering. And he says the same thing as you: "And what if I don't want to go there?"

I guess we're all (kind of?) saying the same thing: A college shouldn't be written off as a waste of time or a sub-par educational experience just because it's a community college or state school. But I'm also adding that a private university shouldn't be written off as a waste of money just because it's more expensive. 

[Demented Daisy]

All I know is that when my daughter was looking at schools, she repeatedly heard the same refrain -- "If you can't afford us, you can always take out student loans!"  

When we went to college night at her high school, the recruiters sounded more like used car salesmen to me.

[Qoass]

Quote

Revisiting one of the peeviest of my peeves: LOUD people. Indoor voices, jackasses. INDOOR VOICES. 

I confess that lately I've wished people would be quieter even when they're outside.

[janestclair]

I'm one of the only people I know without student loan debt. I could've gone to a more expensive, Ivy League school, but I went to a state school that gave me lots of money in scholarships and only paid  a couple grand a semester plus books, which I paid with my parents' help and my summer job.  Best decision I ever made. I liked my school - it was challenging and had lots of opportunities, but still small enough that I felt like a person and not a number.  Might a more expensive school have been better?  Maybe.  But having no student loans to pay is definitely great.

I think (and mention the option to students frequently) that going to a community college for 2 years is actually a great idea.  Get your general education requirements out of the way for much, much cheaper. Ultimately, it doesn't matter where you got the credits, as long as you make sure they'll transfer to the school you eventually want to attend.  Calculus is calculus. Who cares?   Especially if you have no idea what you're going to major in - why spend $600 dollars a credit to figure it out? Take a bunch of courses at a community college and figure out what you like first instead of going into debt while you change your mind about what you want to major in.

I'm sorry...I have no indoor voice.  I have many things working against me though.  My dad can't hear for shit, I'm a teacher, and I'm from NJ.  It's a lost cause. I do try though.

[topanga]

27 minutes ago, janestclair said:

I'm one of the only people I know without student loan debt. I could've gone to a more expensive, Ivy League school, but I went to a state school that gave me lots of money in scholarships and only paid  a couple grand a semester plus books, which I paid with my parents' help and my summer job.  Best decision I ever made. I liked my school - it was challenging and had lots of opportunities, but still small enough that I felt like a person and not a number.  Might a more expensive school have been better?  Maybe.  But having no student loans to pay is definitely great.

I think (and mention the option to students frequently) that going to a community college for 2 years is actually a great idea.  Get your general education requirements out of the way for much, much cheaper. Ultimately, it doesn't matter where you got the credits, as long as you make sure they'll transfer to the school you eventually want to attend.  Calculus is calculus. Who cares?   Especially if you have no idea what you're going to major in - why spend $600 dollars a credit to figure it out? Take a bunch of courses at a community college and figure out what you like first instead of going into debt while you change your mind about what you want to major in.

I'm sorry...I have no indoor voice.  I have many things working against me though.  My dad can't hear for shit, I'm a teacher, and I'm from NJ.  It's a lost cause. I do try though.

I hear ya. But for me, going to a private university wound up being cheaper than attending the local state univerity. At the college I attended, I received a lot of need-based scholarships and grants (my family's income was somewhere between working class and just above the poverty line). Yes, I did have some student loans, but there was no parental contribution. If I'd gone to my state school, my expected parental contribution would have been almost a grand per semester, and my mother did not have that money. So I would've had to borrow it anyway. 

janestclair, seeing as you are from NJ, I have to ask: do you say 'Cheryl' (two syllables) or 'Shirl!'? (An ongoing discussion on another thread). 

[Silje]

I've just paid my semester fee for the upcoming semester, $73. That fee goes to finance student welfare organizations on campus, a copying fee and a donation to a charitable organization. Less than 10% attend private institutions where I'm from, so the majority of students that have student loans (if you pass your classes, around 40% is converted to a grant) get them to cover living expenses.   

A friend of mine in high school tattooed her own name down her forearm. In big letters. With a star at the beginning and end. It makes me cringe just thinking about it.     

[Petunia13]

Is there a college or university thread? 

[janestclair]

2 hours ago, topanga said:

janestclair, seeing as you are from NJ, I have to ask: do you say 'Cheryl' (two syllables) or 'Shirl!'? (An ongoing discussion on another thread). 

Definitely two syllables.

[JTMacc99]

3 hours ago, topanga said:

janestclair, seeing as you are from NJ, I have to ask: do you say 'Cheryl' (two syllables) or 'Shirl!'? (An ongoing discussion on another thread). 

Also a Jersey boy here: two syllables. 

[ParadoxLost]

I went on a business trip to a place that I've decided to dub 'the land where technology has no signal'.  I haven't quite worked out how people function there where cellular, TV, and internet cut out quite frequently.  You'd think I was in the middle of nowhere but I wasn't.

[bilgistic]

That sounds like my apartment, with my service from Time Warner Cable.

[Demented Daisy]

13 hours ago, Silje said:

A friend of mine in high school tattooed her own name down her forearm. In big letters. With a star at the beginning and end. It makes me cringe just thinking about it.

A couple of years ago, my sister was thinking of getting a portrait of herself as Princess Leia on her arm.  Thankfully, I talked her out of it.

[Blergh]

To each their own but  , could someone explain to me what benefit there could be in a 'reverse mullet'? I mean, what's the point of shaving the sides and back of one's scalp bald but then growing out the top part of one's follicles to the point of needing a tie. If one believes it's too long to be practical and one's already cutting the rest of one's hair, why not just trim it also?

[bilgistic]

Why be blond? Why have a "soccer mom" haircut? Why have an "old lady" haircut that gets "set" once a week at the "beauty shop"? Why be brunette? Why have a bald spot combover?

[Petunia13]

You mean a shaved back bob like Becky from Roseanne had? 

I think it's cute and she was my favorite Becky but I liked long hair Becky as Eliott on Scrubs. 

[zxy556575]

First of all, I am under no illusions that my social security number is private. Every insurance company, employer, government agency, mortgage lender, credit card company, bank, doctors' office, etc. has access to it and numerous "exposés" on local news programs have shown how easy it is for someone to buy a $39 background check and get all my info online.

So today I get an email from the SSA saying they have instituted a multifactor authentication process for logging into my account that involves sending a one-time security code via text message. And here's the kicker -- if I don't have have a text-enabled cell phone? I "will not be able to access your My Social Security account." So TOUGH SHIT from the government. Oh, and any applicable text message fees apply.

I understand the need for security measures and I probably only log into my social security account once or twice a year, but it's still irritating. They already force me to change my password every 3 months or so.

[Qoass]

I feel ya.  Apparently the Red Cross is in desperate need of blood so I tried to use their website to make an appointment and they expected me to create an account.  I guess I've done one in the past so yup, who the hell knows what password I created but I'll have to do the "Forgot my password" thing except I can't find it on the page.  So I'll have to call the 1-800 number which is 1-800-red-cross which I have to spell into the phone because they can't just list the frickin' number at which point I get an automated message telling me that due to the dire shortage, their call volume is extra heavy so please hold for the next operator.

Can't imagine why they can't get more donors...

[Blergh]

Sorry if my terminology for that kind of hairstyle was a bit off. Well, IMO, that style itself is off.

[BooksRule]

Quote

You mean a shaved back bob like Becky from Roseanne had? 

Back when that style was popular (for a brief time) I wanted that cut, but the woman who was going to cut my hair recommended me not to get it.  She said that it wouldn't go with my 'head shape' (she called the 'shaved in the back/longer on top' the Joan of Arc cut.).  I wasn't sure if that was an insult or not, but she was nice and I seem to remember that she gave me a good haircut, but I can't remember exactly what style.  Now I just keep it cut really short.  I like being able to wash it, comb it and have it totally 'air dry' by the time I drive to work (five minutes away from my house).  And, I used to keep it blonde, but I don't really care anymore, so I let it go silvery gray and I get more compliments about the gray than I ever did when I was a blonde.  Go figure!  

[auntlada]

This haircut?

It looks a little bit like someone was going to do a Dorothy Hamill wedge haircut, but cut too much at the bottom and had to shave the bottom. I like the Dorothy Hamill cut better myself, but when I got it in fifth grade, my hair did not cooperate much with it. My wedge haircut mostly was just flat.

[Demented Daisy]

I thought we were talking about 90's skater hair:

[Petunia13]

That style was in for a while. I think it's edgy. And I remember also girls with longer hair and a shaved underneath you could see with pony tails. 

Bonus round is when it was the shaved underneath but they also had hair wraps &/or little braid and an obvious highlight aka the Rayanne Graff. 

[bilgistic]

It's back, and the shaving underneath longer hair at the nape of the neck is called an "undercut". There are designs and dyeing that stylists do in the shaving. It's really phenomenal what talented stylists there are out there. I have a bad Instagram habit of too much time spent on hair (and tattoo and cat and art and comics) photos and videos habit...

Getting something off my chest...

I feel like this thread has been a little judgy lately. Being peeved about something--work...cable...food...your neighbors...weather...my cat pissing in my closet--is one thing, but going on about how you don't get why a person would want to look a certain way feels like walking on treacherous road to me. People's appearances are expressions of so many deeply personal things--their socioeconomic status, gender, ethnicity, religious affiliation, age, health--and the way we choose (or can't choose) to appear/display these things is also deeply personal. So, casting aspersions on personal appearance, e.g., apparel, hairstyle or body art, feels judgmental.

I'm not pointing at one specific person; the general tone of the thread has gone this way over the last week or so, and it's an easy place to go. I'm guilty of it, too, in real life and online. I'm not at all suggesting censorship, but more thoughtfulness. If I've made this up because I'm paranoid, you can tell me; we can discuss it. I really do appreciate y'all and our virtual conversations.

Edited July 30, 2016 by bilgistic

[Petunia13]

I don't know... I mean there's been peeves shared about stuff I do or say. One was several people talking about a word I used in a post in THIS thread, so if that's ok and more pointed I don't know if it would be fair to outlaw appearance based peeves that are not personally directed. Besides people have made many about clothes which is also superficial. And if that's wrong why wouldn't ones knocking intelligence be ok? I don't know if it's a line cross or repugnant to call an article of clothing or hairstyle tacky or dated, but sup cool to call an activity or habit idiotic. 

[bilgistic]

It's after 4am and I'm still awake for no good reason, so I need to put the phone down already.

Again, I want to emphasize that I didn't suggest banning anything--just being more thoughtful/considerate.

@Petunia13, I think you are saying you have felt upset by posts about your traits or actions, though obviously not directed at you personally--just that X commenter saw Y person doing it and posted about it.

If that's true, I hope a couple things could continue to happen as a result of our discussion: 1) the commenter speaks up when they feel bothered, and 2) other commenters respectfully discuss the concerns. We've started that here.

Being slightly less obtuse:

PEEVING POSTER--says why they are bothered/peeved (anger is expected with peeves)--"My wife eats crackers in bed and it makes me crazy!"

GROUP--discuss, object respectfully if needed ("I eat crackers in bed because I'm hungry at night, and I'm single and don't mind sleeping on crumbs", NOT, "All cracker manufacturers should be burned at the stake!! That'll teach your wife!"), discuss, joke...new peeve

Coda: I just want this little cracker crumb of the internet to continue to be a place we all enjoy visiting, and where we don't feel judged or attacked. There are galaxies of that elsewhere online. Not here.

[Petunia13]

No, it was exactly as I described, a word I used in this thread was discussed by the group ...it wasn't that long ago . It was a bit condescending and much more pointed than a vague blanket statement like the ones bugging you. 

The thing is people use words or phrases that annoy the shit out of me sometimes or sign their posts with the same dorky phrase ex- ::hee hee::: and I never knew it would be ok to say something or make a PA comment. 

Bottom line yes making peeves or judgy remarks about looks or clothes is unevolved but it's a judgy thread. And though it blows and shouldn't be that way - it's how a lot of the world works. I know damn well I don't get the same service at Sephora or Bloomies and some of my richer clients aren't all friendly w me when we meet in public because of my appearance. To pretend differently would be naive. And to be an individual and have a quirky look you need a thick skin. If a person isnt proud and "I don't give a fuck!" about it maybe they shouldn't rock purple hair at 40 or a neck tattoo that says "princess" or whatever. 

Edited July 30, 2016 by Petunia13

[zxy556575]

I genuinely don't know why this vexes me, but it's along the same lines as a cashier making small talk comments about what I'm buying.

I went to the grocery store on Thursday. I don't go a lot, maybe once every 10 days or so. I don't "know" any of the staff and don't really see the same ones all that often. Thursday I bought a few things same as usual; the visit was nothing out of the ordinary. I had to go back the next day because I'd forgotten something. I was walking down an aisle -- not even checking out -- and one of the employees saw me and said, "Hi. Back again already?"

I think he was the cashier who had checked me out the day before. I gave him what was probably a grim smile and said something innocuous, but what I wanted to reply was, "What the hell business is it of yours?"

[auntlada]

That's why I don't mind staring a bit -- or at least looking a little longer than a glance -- at someone with fluorescent green hair, @Petunia13. I try not too say anything in their hearing range, but I figure you don't color your hair fluorescent green if you don't want people to notice it and you.

At my high school reunion recently, one woman had bright blue hair. It was disconcerting and hard to talk to her without staring at it. We did our best, though, or at least I did, to act like it was no big deal and perfectly ordinary. What bothered me most about it wasn't that it was bright blue (Cookie Monster blue) but that it looked horribly damaged. It looked like it had the texture of straw. I always hate to see hair so overprocessed that I can see the strawlike nature of it.

it also peeved me that so many of the women would not use their reading glasses because they didn't want people to see them in glasses. I guess it made them feel old, but it kept sounding like they thought glasses looked awful. I've worn glasses since fourth grade and wanted to tell them to get over themselves because no one cared if they were using reading glasses. I think I said something similar, but less strong to a couple who had been my best friends growing up. Using reading glasses makes you look less old than straining and still not being able to read small print.

[Wiendish Fitch]

I have to fight back the urge to groan when people complain glasses "make them look old". Then how do you account for little kids who need glasses?!?!

I needed glasses for distance when I was in seventh grade. Yeah, 13, that's a wonderful age to get glasses, isn't it? It's not enough I'm socially and physically awkward, have no friends of which to speak, I'm going through puberty and my body is neither here nor there, I'm wearing horrific clothes that my mom obviously picked out for me because I'm too young and stupid to care, but now I need glasses! Oh, frabjous day! The glasses will complement my braces perfectly! Now my popularity rating will really skyrocket! I'm going to really fight the boys back with... nothing at all!

Anyone who whines about needing glasses after 30 probably never went through the obligatory "gawky" phase, and should shut the hell up. 

Edited July 30, 2016 by Wiendish Fitch