S08.E03: First Week of School

[Micks Picks]

I bow to the master, NausetGirl.  Well said indeed.  I was pretty tired of the snide "no child" comments too.  If I had a gallon of rocket fuel for everyone of the "pro" mothers who were all into the child only thing, they'd be on the moon by now.

Edited December 19, 2014 by Micks Picks

[NausetGirl]

I bow to the master, NausetGirl.  Well said indeed.  I was pretty tired of the snide "no child" comments too.  If I had a gallon of rocket fuel for everyone of the "pro" mothers who were all into the child only thing, they'd be on the moon by now.

 

Hey Micks Picks, thank you for the kind words.  A wonderful holiday to you and yours... :>)

[NausetGirl]

I don't know why this suddenly came to mind but I just had to chuckle when Zoey was in the pool, wailing her head off but when she was asked to dip her head down into the water and blow her bubbles she would and then go right back to hollering in-between, heh, I thought that was so cute.

 

Her lungs have always been one of her strongest assets and it appears that hasn't changed. Though I could guess that in the years to come she and Will might challenge each other in the pool as they get older.

 

Zoey in the pool was unbelievably cute.  That little peanut is quickly becoming one of my favorite people ever.  Even though she was terrified, you could actually see her struggling through her fear.  Reminds me of that line from A Midsummer Night's Dream - "...though she be but little, she is fierce..."  Zoey for President!

[CPP83]

Zoey in the pool was unbelievably cute.  That little peanut is quickly becoming one of my favorite people ever.  Even though she was terrified, you could actually see her struggling through her fear.  Reminds me of that line from A Midsummer Night's Dream - "...though she be but little, she is fierce..."  Zoey for President!

 

 

Zoey is just a bright star, I can't get enough of her.

 

I thought she was very brave for sticking it out in the pool, still following instructions and doing what she was told eventually.

 

I also thought that Jen had a real "mom" moment when she wondered if she should stay away from the pool and let the teacher handle Zoey by himself or if she should offer Zoey vocal and visible support and encouragement.

 

I believe Jen's reflections on the moment were very honest and showed how much she really thinks about how her actions might and can and do impact her kids.

 

She didn't want Zoey to think that Mommy was "rescuing her from something bad", perhaps reinforcing her fear and apprehension of her swimming lessons, but she wanted Zoey to know she had support, that she wasn't just being manhandled and half drowned and Mama just stood by and did nothing to help her.

 

I think in the end Jen successfully handled the situation. She was able to assist Zoey's calm and trustworthy teacher without interfering with the lessons and Zoey had her Mommy cheering her on and giving all the positive reinforcement and praise she could ever need.

 

I also loved Zoey's reaction when they asked her if she wanted to go again once the lesson was over, she made it very clear she was done for the day, heh.

[mojito]

 

Many people who have never given birth/raised kids know a great deal about children and child development.

And even more people don't. Until you've been a parent, all the theory and educational background and experience as an educator mean nothing when it comes to a mother trying to get two toddlers out the door on the first day of school.

Edited December 19, 2014 by mojito

[Foghorn Leghorn]

Especially coming from all the childless experts.

 

Jen and Bill were both childless experts so I doubt they feel this way because of it.  They have also been given several passes at their parenting choices so far because they are learning as first time parents.

 

How many great teachers/nannies/caregivers would we not have if a requirement of their job was "must already have children."

[mojito]

 

Jen and Bill were both childless experts so I doubt they feel this way because of it.  They have also been given several passes at their parenting choices so far because they are learning as first time parents.

 

How many great teachers/nannies/caregivers would we not have if a requirement of their job was "must already have children."

So if Jen and Bill, let's say, two years ago, were giving advice about raising children, how much crediblity would you give them?

 

As for as hiring nannies who have not had children in the past....truly, I'd be more concerned about their experience as nannies than their having birthed children.

[ZoloftBlob]

And even more people don't. Until you've been a parent, all the theory and educational background and experience as an educator mean nothing when it comes to a mother trying to get two toddlers out the door on the first day of school.

 

Ever see Margaret Cho's routine? (I think its Margaret Cho, anyway)

 

She does this funny bit about how she never goes to a male gynecologist because its "like going to a car mechanic who's never owned a car".

 

It's funny but also incorrect. I respect the views of parents but every time I see the "you're not a parent, you don't know!" card thrown down... I want to follow it up with how parents - since they *know* - should be prosecuted every single time they do something dumbass like leave the toddler in the car, or let the toddler drown.

 

Because they *knew* and should be held accountable instead of pitied. But no one likes hearing that when some parent manages to get their kid killed thru their own stupidity.

 

Birthing a child doesn't impart wisdom. Trust me, I have seen the parade of idiot parents on judge judy.

[Foghorn Leghorn]

So if Jen and Bill, let's say, two years ago, were giving advice about raising children, how much crediblity would you give them?

 

 

NausetGirl said it best and I think what is key is not being personally involved or having an emotional stake.  

 

Many people who have never given birth/raised kids know a great deal about children and child development.  And it is often individuals who are not personally-involved or have an emotional stake that can more correctly assess situations, offer suggestions, do therapy or remediation, plan and carry out treatment.  You don't have to lay the egg to know how to cook it.

Edited December 19, 2014 by Foghorn Leghorn

[mojito]

 

It's funny but also incorrect. I respect the views of parents but every time I see the "you're not a parent, you don't know!" card thrown down... I want to follow it up with how parents - since they *know* - should be prosecuted every single time they do something dumbass like leave the toddler in the car, or let the toddler drown.

But the thing is, I'm not saying "you're not a parent, you don't know". I'm not saying that parents know. I'm saying that parents know not to judge other parents because it's a whole different thing being there than watching someone there. I will add that lots of people know not to judge a situation such as trying to get toddlers out the door, whether or not they have had children.

 

I understand that you're arguing against a certain sentiment, believe me, I do. But you're lumping all comments about not being judgmental into only one sentiment ("you're not a parent, you don't know), and that's taking a narrow view.

Edited December 19, 2014 by mojito

[Foghorn Leghorn]

I was in the camp that thought Jen did the right thing by letting the goldfish thing go that morning. Howver, I think all opinions are valid.

I don't think that voicing an opinion on a discussion board is necessarily being judgemental. People who voice an opinion on this board probably would never tell other people what to do with their kids, or judge them as parents.

 

I guess Jen learned a parenting mistake with Will!  Never leave the pantry accessible in future!  Once he had them it was too late unless she wanted a meltdown so she had no choice at that point in time!

 

And to the second part of your post......well at least not to their faces!!!  LOL

[BizBuzz]

I probably shouldn't get involved ...

 

::giggle::

 

However, I grew up around kids, was the live in week long babysitter of two kids under 10 when I was just 15 by myself ... took care of kids all throughout my first marriage ... in my second marriage I married a man with two kids (ages 2 and 3) at 32 and until I had my own child at 37 did I fully comprehend the statement "pick your battles".

 

Something does change when you are wholly and completely responsible for a child. 

[Jellybeans]

A child is not an egg.

For the most part it makes parents mad when "childless experts" try to tell them "they know how to do it better"' yeah, right take a number and get in line. I'll call you if I need you.

I enjoyed talking to parents about raising kids but not those without kids. Those days are behind me now but I DO remember the many, many "experts" ... perhaps because of my disability. I guess disabled people attract experts like honey and flies.

[ZoloftBlob]

What I am against is how dismissive it is.

 

To use your example - if Jen or Bill were giving parenting advice two years ago, because they weren't parents at the time, I would take into consideration if they were handing out advice but I wouldn't dismiss it in its entirety simply because "they aren't parents so they can't know".

 

I've worked as a teacher (in fairness not a lot and not recently) and I don't have children and my suggestions and advice are routinely dismissed because *I can't know*. I haven't plopped a baby out so no matter what my experiences in life are - I *can't* know. *Can't*. But some 20 year old with three kids and no education? She's just a sparkling font of wisdom on parenting.

 

The tone of this

Especially coming from all the childless experts.

 

is dismissive and mocking. Its very clearly marking certain territory off limits for people who don't have children. After all, childless experts are like the male gynocologist - can't really know anything at all since they don't have the required parts.

 

 

[TEEVEE]

This was my interpretation as well.  I think Bill expected that Will would ace his first day at school socially, as he has repeatedly been an enthusiastic participant in nearly everything they've done with him.  If I was Bill, I would have thought exactly the same thing. I think they were pleasantly-surprised that Zoey liked school though, since she's definitely the more hesitant of the two.  Zoey doesn't leap into new situations as easily as Will; she definitely hangs back and observes but eventually, when she realizes she's OK and safe, she'll venture forth.  I also see this trait as an indication of her intelligence and maturity, since even at three, it shows she thinks before acting.  I wouldn't have said this when we first saw her in India, right after her adoption, but Zoey looks like she's going to be quite an independent little spirit.

I think Will is enthusiastic along as he has food in his hand and gets his way. The overhang of belly in his swimsuit made me realize how much weight he has gained. Both Jen and Bill know that being overweight is so bad for a little person. I think it would have been in his overall best interests to stop the food binging asap. How does a 4 yr old LP, lose weight? It's not like he's going to shoot up. Sad.

Edited December 20, 2014 by wrestlesflamingos
corrected verbs

[walnutqueen]

I probably shouldn't get involved ...

 

::giggle::

 

However, I grew up around kids, was the live in week long babysitter of two kids under 10 when I was just 15 by myself ... took care of kids all throughout my first marriage ... in my second marriage I married a man with two kids (ages 2 and 3) at 32 and until I had my own child at 37 did I fully comprehend the statement "pick your battles".

 

Something does change when you are wholly and completely responsible for a child. 

 

Biz - you are onto something here, and please bear with me for a personal moment here.  I was the happily barren prematurely perimenopusal child-hater in my very late 30s, when I became the Lamaze partner of Mom and substitute baby daddy to an 8 year old and a fetus.  The 8 yr old started my downward spiral with her sweet nature, but the second that baby grabbed my fingers, my whole world shifted, and I CHANGED.  Profoundly.  Call it hormones, bonding, or a nostalgic return to my childhood (when I was surrogate mom to my 12 years' younger half-brother), but it was the second time in my life I valued another human life over my own, and knew an unconditional and all encompassing love.

 

That said, I think we can all bring something to the child-rearing table; parents or not, we were all once CHILDREN, and have some first hand experience from the other side of the coin.  :-)

 

My favorite part of this episode was the Sim center at the hospital.  The joy of being able to take a baby home from the NICU is indescribable, as is the fear.  This is a very good thing Jen and her team are doing.

[TEEVEE]

Speaking personally, yes, I assigned buddies for different situations or events - although not usually at the very beginning of the year.  It's often better to observe for a while and see what's what and who's who before doing that. Otherwise you could end up with two very shy kids as buddies [not cool] or two very "verbal" kids [worse - LOL].  Always worked better for me to mix things up a little.

 

In Zoey's class I don't think the children would be talking all that much to each other at this point. The interaction is mostly teacher-to-students right now. The concept of "making a friend, having friends" is likely beyond what Zoey could comprehend right now. The kids are probably just watching everything that's going on intently, listening to the teacher etc. Activities would include playing, simple puzzles, being read to, learning short songs, doing very simple art activities, maybe a snack and short rest period, maybe learning little prayers if it's a church-affiliated program etc. The teacher could pair the children up as "buddies" - they'd hold each other's hands while walking to various activities, going on field trips etc. But I'm fairly sure most of the children wouldn't even know each other's names for quite a while, though I'm sure some of the brighter kids have learned some.

 

Wow, this is significant. I hope Bill and Jen get the chance to observe Will in his classroom where they can compare his abilities at present to what the other kids his age are doing. Even if all they're able to see is the ballpark to aim for in getting him up to speed.

With all the money they have, a Will being a special needs child, and with Jen's affiliation with TX Children's, it would seem that in Houston there would be programs that would fit Will better than a mainstream pre-school, at this time. Zooey will likely do much better than Will simply because of her younger age, and quite possibly as someone else suggested, perhaps Will is permantly delayed.

[Absolom]

I don't think that voicing an opinion on a discussion board is necessarily being judgemental. People who voice an opinion on this board probably would never tell other people what to do with their kids, or judge them as parents.

 

I say a few things in online discussion boards that I would never say to a person's face.  And I think that's fair and reasonable.  People who put themselves on TV are opening up their TV shows for discussion and if they didn't generate discussion those shows would likely die.  I find being rude and dismissive hinders all discussion whether online or face to face. 

Edited December 19, 2014 by Absolom

[TEEVEE]

And even more people don't. Until you've been a parent, all the theory and educational background and experience as an educator mean nothing when it comes to a mother trying to get two toddlers out the door on the first day of school.

And a nanny.

[BitterApple]

Zoey in the pool was unbelievably cute.  That little peanut is quickly becoming one of my favorite people ever.  Even though she was terrified, you could actually see her struggling through her fear.  Reminds me of that line from A Midsummer Night's Dream - "...though she be but little, she is fierce..."  Zoey for President!

In that scene I was glad that Jen encouraged Zoey to work through her fear instead of letting her quit. After my first  swimming lesson at age three I was terrified of the water and didn't want to go back. My mom told me I at least had to go and sit on the edge of the pool and watch. Naturally, once I saw all the other kids having a blast I wanted to join in and that ended my fear of water pretty quickly. I think Zoey is one of those who kids who hates stuff at first, then loves it once she gives an activity a chance.

[Foghorn Leghorn]

 

Given Jen's personality she will be getting him every possible therapy to make sure he has everything he needs to be successful.

 

I am missing a connection between Jen's personality and Will getting every possible therapy? 

[ZoloftBlob]

I am missing a connection between Jen's personality and Will getting every possible therapy?

 

Probably a reference to her being an aggressive problem solver, and overly thorough.

[mtnrunner]

Probably a reference to her being an aggressive problem solver, and overly thorough.

Yes, a type A person like Jen isn't going to let her child flounder.  She's going to do everything possible to help them.  While most parents would do that eventually, I don't think Jen is the type to have a teacher/doctor/etc say something to her about Will and sit on it for days, weeks, months.  She'll take action immediately.   

[Saylii]

As viewers, we have to remember that the Zoey likes school/Will doesn't scene was recreated for the cameras.  I don't think I could believe any parent would wait a week to ask their kids how school is going for them.  It's obvious that scene was staged to give viewers the knowledge about how each kid is doing in school, but not any details.  Bill talking about school reminding Will of the orphanage probably wasn't an assumption.  They would have had longer talks about it earlier in the week, when the cameras weren't rolling.  Until we see evidence otherwise, Jen and Bill are handling the issues correctly.  They aren't embarrassing their kids on TV by giving us every gritty detail, but they are making sure the viewers know everything isn't sunshine and flowers.

[Mom2twoNonna2-3]

And even more people don't. Until you've been a parent, all the theory and educational background and experience as an educator mean nothing when it comes to a mother trying to get two toddlers out the door on the first day of school.

 

I've worked as a teacher (in fairness not a lot and not recently) and I don't have children and my suggestions and advice are routinely dismissed because *I can't know*. I haven't plopped a baby out so no matter what my experiences in life are - I *can't* know. *Can't*. But some 20 year old with three kids and no education? She's just a sparkling font of wisdom on parenting.

 

Two of my dear friends are teachers, they both have elementary and high school experience. One was my daughter's teacher for 2 years (her school used the Montesorri method of two grades in one, she is a tested and qualified gifted student, did not get left behind). Now, that they are finally married and foster parents to two beautiful boys and lamenting about homework, science fair projects, bed times, getting out the door on time. I giggle watching them try to navigate the life that is of a parent and encourage them.

 

I never dismissed the observations or advice of any teacher or person in our life who we "hired" to help. I have a child with mental health issues and he hates his BSC because she gives us advice of how to reign him in. He hates when I follow her advice, but, it works.

 

Bill and Jen didn't get newborns where they learned step by step how to parent and about their child's personalities from birth. They got two children who had years of experiences behind them that helped form their personalities. They will never know exactly what those experiences were like biological parents would. They are doing great. The term pick your battles has been in my home for years. When my daughter started her obsession with hair coloring, we chose to accept it. She made good grades, was well behaved and helpful. Hair grows and her natural color (not sure anymore what it is) will come back. You may look at my child and see  freak, at times, because her hair may be pink, blue, green or a combination, but, we see a woman who was smart, beautiful, polite and respectful. I can't ask for more. My son's "pick your battles" changes daily. We discovered that large family gatherings weren't good for him, so we opted to be more small, immediate family based. Would we love to be with the whole family like we grew up in, of course, but, it's not worth a meltdown. 

 

And the NICU scene was my favorite also. I was happy to see that there was somewhere that family members and those in immediate support roles can practice how to handle a crisis, alone and get feedback before they are faced with it. If, and God forbid it doesn't, it happens at home they will feel more comfortable handling the situation.

[Honey]

The problem is, if your children dismiss what you say, and don't listen to you, what will happen if they are about to run in front of a car and you yell "STOP!!!"....they keep running.

[Jellybeans]

I think in general, when you have a disability like me you learn quickly to be very dismissive of "experts" in your life (I am by no means rude in person) because there is something about a disability that draws people who think they know more than you out of the woodwork. Or, maybe they think you simply are helpless which isn't the case. Disabled people (or at least I do) prefer to do things themselves.

Once I was asked if I was "allowed" to drive. WHAT?

[ZoloftBlob]

Once I was asked if I was "allowed" to drive. WHAT?

 

Well, to be fair, I do know some disabled people who either aren't allowed to drive or are unable to pass the driving test even with accomadations like hand brakes. And honestly, there's a lot of genuine curiousity about how people with disabilities manage. 

 

On the other hand, thats not a question I consider polite to ask unless I know the person *really* well. I have a friend with muscular dystrophy and he's generally happy to answer my questions about wheeled life but some of the questions I have asked him would be rude if it was someone I didn't know well.

[NausetGirl]

And even more people don't. Until you've been a parent, all the theory and educational background and experience as an educator mean nothing when it comes to a mother trying to get two toddlers out the door on the first day of school.

 

No doubt about it.  Working with children in a classroom is different than wrangling a flesh-and-blood three-year old at home, and I would never claim otherwise.  But knowledge of children and child development should not be discounted [or worse, dismissed] simply because the individual hasn't given birth or raised children.  And that knowledge most certainly does NOT "mean nothing" or "go out the door."  Ask any teacher who has worked with kids before becoming a parent whether they have used their previous training and experience in raising their own children. Otherwise, with your argument, every OB-GYN would have to actually have a baby before being able to see patients - and every minister would have had to talk with God.

[Jellybeans]

Otherwise, with your argument, every OB-GYN would have to actually have a baby before being able to see patients - and every minister would have had to talk with God.

No, I think you are missing my point. As a parent or a patient choosing a Doctor, I have the right to select the criteria I will use to make said decisions just like you do. I did not say she had to have a baby. I said she had to be female. It has worked for ME.

What is different about people with disabilities, something changes in the way people treat you. When my kids were little, EVERYBODY had something to say about my parenting because I was deaf. Good times! :-)

I did not have MS at that time but my MS is stable.

I am more interested in explaining how the disabled get treated sooooo differently when it comes to their parenting skills, etc. I see it happening with Jen and Bill. No offense intended.

Edited December 19, 2014 by Jellybeans

[NausetGirl]

But the thing is, I'm not saying "you're not a parent, you don't know". I'm not saying that parents know. I'm saying that parents know not to judge other parents because it's a whole different thing being there than watching someone there. I will add that lots of people know not to judge a situation such as trying to get toddlers out the door, whether or not they have had children.

 

I understand that you're arguing against a certain sentiment, believe me, I do. But you're lumping all comments about not being judgmental into only one sentiment ("you're not a parent, you don't know), and that's taking a narrow view.

 

Definitely agree with your point as outlined in more detail here.  Thanks for elaborating, mojito. You've illustrated something I've believed for years myself.  It often takes just a little more information, clarification, explanation to get things better understood.  "To have the light come on," as it were.  And when you only listen to people you agree with, you never learn anything new.

[NausetGirl]

I probably shouldn't get involved ...

 

::giggle::

 

However, I grew up around kids, was the live in week long babysitter of two kids under 10 when I was just 15 by myself ... took care of kids all throughout my first marriage ... in my second marriage I married a man with two kids (ages 2 and 3) at 32 and until I had my own child at 37 did I fully comprehend the statement "pick your battles".

 

Something does change when you are wholly and completely responsible for a child. 

 

This I don't dispute for one second - absolutely true. But the change does not necessarily impart more knowledge or insight into how to handle given situations.  It does create an emotional stake in them however.  This is why doctors shouldn't treat family members - at least in life-threatening or emergency situations.

[JennyMominFL]

The problem is, if your children dismiss what you say, and don't listen to you, what will happen if they are about to run in front of a car and you yell "STOP!!!"....they keep running.

When my kids were to small to understand that cars were dangerous, I either held their hands at all times or had them in a stroller.

Edited December 19, 2014 by JennyMominFL

[NausetGirl]

No, I think you are missing my point. As a parent or a patient choosing a Doctor, I have the right to select the criteria I will use to make said decisions just like you do. I did not say she had to have a baby. I said she had to be female. It has worked for ME.

What is different about people with disabilities, something changes in the way people treat you. When my kids were little, EVERYBODY had something to say about my parenting because I was deaf. Good times! :-)

I did not have MS at that time but my MS is stable.

I am more interested in explaining how the disabled get treated sooooo differently when it comes to their parenting skills, etc. I see it happening with Jen and Bill. No offense intended.

 

Absolutely none taken, JellyBeans. I too think Bill & Jen are probably judged differently - given passes etc - because of their stature. In some respects at least.  And I think some of it may be justified. In others, absolutely not.

[Jellybeans]

Absolutely none taken, JellyBeans. I too think Bill & Jen are probably judged differently - given passes etc - because of their stature. In some respects at least.  And I think some of it may be justified. In others, absolutely not.

Well, having grown up deaf, I can tell you every single day someone treats me different because I am deaf. I can talk but most people know I am deaf or think I'm from another country. Can't escape it, even now. Thing is, it CHANGES our relationship. I do not know if it is a biological thing or what, but non-disabled peeps almost always take some kind of helper mentality when with a disabled peep.

Drives me crazeeeee. Can you imagine the Arnold Family? They have to learn to deal with it coming at them from four angles.

[NausetGirl]

 

 

I've worked as a teacher (in fairness not a lot and not recently) and I don't have children and my suggestions and advice are routinely dismissed because *I can't know*. I haven't plopped a baby out so no matter what my experiences in life are - I *can't* know. *Can't*. But some 20 year old with three kids and no education? She's just a sparkling font of wisdom on parenting.

 

So true.  In my experience, most 20-somethings are fonts of wisdom - on just about everything. I look back on 22-year old NausetGirl in horror and shame. I had EVERYTHING figured out back then. I actually remember thinking "Why are so many adults, my parents etc, stumped by so much?" Thirty five years later, I'm one of them myself.  Live and learn...

[Honey]

When my kids were to small to understand that cars were dangerous, I either held their hands at all times or had them in a stroller.

No, I didn't mean they were necessarily too young to understand that cars are dangerous.  Even older kids can be so "in the moment" that they take off running without thinking (a ball goes in the road, their dog runs across the street).  There are certain situations when your kids need to listen to you, and respond immediately. 

[mojito]

 

It often takes just a little more information, clarification, explanation to get things better understood.

 

You're all right, NausetGirl. I try to be short and concise in my writing. Sometimes it's best to be more wordy.

[walnutqueen]

I wish I could be wordy and concise, but my disabled forelimbs force me into pithy territory more often than not, which leaves a lot open to interpretation (and occasional misunderstanding).  Alas and alack for me - but lucky for everyone else who isn't compelled to read my prolific and pedantic screed ...  :-)

 

So I use my daily rations of LIKES - a lot; and I "choose my battles", as it were.  :-)

 

I'd be a fucking menace to society with one of those Dragon-speak thingys.  :-D

 

My favorite part of the pool party was showing how the kids were being taught to breathe AND climb out of the sides of the pool themselves.

[ZoloftBlob]

38 minutes ago

 

I wish I could be wordy and concise, but my disabled forelimbs force me into pithy territory more often than not, which leaves a lot open to interpretation (and occasional misunderstanding).

 

Wait.... walnutqueen is a Tyrannosaurus Rex? :D

 

Walnut - Dragonnaturallyspeaking is actually all kinds of awesome. Highly recommend!

[walnutqueen]

ZlB - I wanted a T-Rex as my avatar due to the ferociously dripping maw and tiny ineffectual arms, but I am as technologically challenged as any old doddering fool, and these old eyes are waiting for a new pair of glasses so I can even SEE those tiny little  ICON pictures on my desktop, nevermind here.  ;-)

 

Needless to say, it is a very good thing I can't afford Dragonnatuallyspeaking, because I cannot seem to shut the fuck up when I should, and would be embarrassed to see a post of mine that required 3 "page down" clicks to ignore.  :-)

 

Should Bill ever decide to put his foot down in a disciplinary way, I'm sure the earth beneath Will's feet would tremble like a magnitude 8.0 earthquake.

Edited December 20, 2014 by walnutqueen

[Honey]

I wish I could be wordy and concise, but my disabled forelimbs force me into pithy territory more often than not, which leaves a lot open to interpretation (and occasional misunderstanding).  Alas and alack for me - but lucky for everyone else who isn't compelled to read my prolific and pedantic screed ...  :-)

 

So I use my daily rations of LIKES - a lot; and I "choose my battles", as it were.  :-)

 

I'd be a fucking menace to society with one of those Dragon-speak thingys.  :-D

 

My favorite part of the pool party was showing how the kids were being taught to breathe AND climb out of the sides of the pool themselves.

I liked that too. I also like how the instructor throws Will up in the air.  It replicates how it would feel to accidently fall in, so Will wouldn't panic since he's used to it.

[Absolom]

The throwing the kids seems to be a part of all current pre-school swim classes.  Water safety is the biggest concern.  The swimming classes I think is one of the best things Jen and Bill are doing for the kids.  They seem to have found an awesome instructor. 

[Honey]

The throwing the kids seems to be a part of all current pre-school swim classes.  Water safety is the biggest concern.  The swimming classes I think is one of the best things Jen and Bill are doing for the kids.  They seem to have found an awesome instructor. 

I agree.  That instructor is very patient

[Honey]

The throwing the kids seems to be a part of all current pre-school swim classes.  Water safety is the biggest concern.  The swimming classes I think is one of the best things Jen and Bill are doing for the kids.  They seem to have found an awesome instructor. 

I agree.  That instructor is very patient

I agree.  That instructor is very patient, and not too bad to look at either.

[walnutqueen]

I agree.  That instructor is very patient

I agree.  That instructor is very patient, and not too bad to look at either.

 

I hadn't noticed.  hee!

[mbutterfly]

Well, to be fair, I do know some disabled people who either aren't allowed to drive or are unable to pass the driving test even with accomadations like hand brakes. And honestly, there's a lot of genuine curiousity about how people with disabilities manage. 

 

On the other hand, thats not a question I consider polite to ask unless I know the person *really* well. I have a friend with muscular dystrophy and he's generally happy to answer my questions about wheeled life but some of the questions I have asked him would be rude if it was someone I didn't know well.

I think the thing is -- like your friend -- most issues are disability specific. If people are concerned about Jen and Bill raising Will and Zoey, how much more concern must have been expressed about the Roloffs rearing three typically-sized children who would have been larger at a very, very young age. 

[walnutqueen]

Speaking purely from the viewpoint of a (damaged) child, I'd take a physically disabled parent over an emotionally disabled one any day of the week (and twice on Sundays, Jelly).  Just sayin'.

[NausetGirl]

You're all right, NausetGirl. I try to be short and concise in my writing. Sometimes it's best to be more wordy.

 

Oh mojito, that's so funny because I'm always being told how wordy and chatty I am.  I'm a firstborn - we're usually yackety-yacks.  In the end I guess the most important thing is to write enough to get the point across and be understood. Some of us can do that in a few words, some of us not so much - LOL. Hey, Happy Holidays!

[Barb23]

Many people who have never given birth/raised kids know a great deal about children and child development.  And it is often individuals who are not personally-involved or have an emotional stake that can more correctly assess situations, offer suggestions, do therapy or remediation, plan and carry out treatment.  You don't have to lay the egg to know how to cook it.

How true. I was having a problem with my son regressing after being potty trained. I remember my mom kind of blowing me off when I talked to her about it. I called his preschool teacher & got so much insight & guidance from her. Bless her heart, she listened to me cry & babble on about it for an hour. (Looking back it seems ridiculous I got that upset about it. Lol) She told me stories of other mothers who had same the problem with their kids & she gave me suggestions which worked.