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S05.E14: To Be Or Not To Be


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Ethan and Moriah's feud comes to a head as they hash out past disagreements; Kim moves the remainder of her things out of the family home; Ethan and Olivia have an honest conversation about the future of their relationship.

Airdate: December 5, 2023

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So Ethan finally defended Olivia to Moriah and seemed to stick to it for the most part.  Guess someone cooked him dinner so he didn't starve to death. :) I do wonder about Moriah at this point.  When she claimed that Olivia never showed her anything about her online music account at first I wondered if she was having some sort of memory issue.  Then looking at her body language and her repeated claim that it "never happened", it was clear that she was lying.  That was such a bizarre thing to do because as Ethan said, he was standing right there when Olivia showed her everything and walked her through changing her password.  I wish he had insisted on an apology to Olivia for essentially calling her a liar and a thief.  I wonder if she ever played her crappy diss track for him.  Some kind soul on Reddit transcribed the lyrics and wow, that is one awful song.  What a nasty thing to do to someone who helped Moriah so much. And TLC we really didn't need to hear even a few seconds of that awful song again.

I wondered about Isaac saying that he was finishing high school then was going to go to college.  In the following episode he and Micah were running down public school, so I am assuming he will graduate from Kim's absentee homeschool.  I suspect he was able to get his basic pilot's license because he was interested in studying what he needed to to get it, but I question whether he can handle even the most basic college courses.  And I know nothing about the aviation industry, so I have no idea how realistic his idea is that he will walk out of college and start working for one of the airlines.  Somehow I doubt it, but I'm sure Kim has blown smoke about it just as she did with Moriah and her music career.

Barry and Kim need to stop having those conversations in front of the kids.  Isaac looked so uncomfortable when they were arguing over that train set.  My parents collected antique trains and went to train shows all the time and my mother still has some that are her favorites.  Both my parents would have ignored that thing.  It may have sentimental value, but I can't picture either Kim or Barry feeling sentimental about anything.  And I loved Kim rewriting history about the house.  She was the one who insisted she needed money so Barry had to sell after he wouldn't move out.  I'm no Barry fan because I think he is just as manipulative as Kim, but he's at least self aware enough not to show it as obviously on camera.

Ethan, what can I say?  Another one lost to the manosphere.  It's very sad, but definitely for the best.  I had so much respect for Olivia for the way she handled that conversation.  When he said the bit about how she should cook him dinner, I was very proud of her for not either laughing in his face or just walking away.  What a dismissive thing to say.  And sorry, Ethan, not having a penis does not determine what you can and can't do in life.  I'm sure he will find some fundie girl to cook his meals and spit out bigoted babies for him.  Meanwhile, Olivia can go live her best life free of this mess.  I hope she continues with therapy because spending four years in a relationship like that is going to leave scars that she should deal with before diving into a new relationship.  I was so happy she told Ethan that she would not put a child through what she went through with her own parents.

This episode was almost Micah free, which suits me fine.  He's full of himself and when the show is gone or his looks start to fade, he will have a rough time of it.  Glad Lydia has a godly boyfriend.  I guess Kim is too busy schmooping around with mushmouth to snoop on her phone.

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Ahh yay! This is finally open. So, my thoughts:

-Fuck Moriah and her lying ass. She’s a manipulator and a perpetual victim. Can’t stand her or people like her. 

-Fuck Kim for having her kids help her move out. But hey, whatever helps her, right? That’s what all these children exist for. 

-Lydia, isn’t there something in the Bible about going into your prayer closet and SHUTTING THE DOOR? Ah well, what’s righteousness without a production crew? So she has a boyfriend who Kim and Barry like. Guess that means he wants her cooking, cleaning, and singing hymns off key. He must be perfect if the cult leaders like him. Fortunately, Lydia has been parentified for most of her life, so she’s ready to roll. 

-Micah, fuck you too. Nothing specific from this episode. I just don’t like him. 

-Good going Ethan. You stood your ground and told your woman to get in the kitchen and fix you a sammich. The cult leaders are proud! He has no clue what to do with a woman who has an original thought. He can fuck on off with the rest of them.

-Olivia, you’re the real winner here. Get away from all these dimwits and live. I have no clue how she affords to travel so much, but you know what? None of my business. Go see the world and find a man who recognizes the good things you bring to the table (in addition to the fact that she is a smoke show). She’d be better off to never interact with another Plath as long as she lives.

 

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8 hours ago, JayDub1987 said:

Fuck Kim for having her kids help her move out

A neighbour had her kids help her take the garbage to the curb before they left for school.  Except the garbage bags contained her suitcases, and as soon as the kids left, her new boyfriend picked her up and she was gone.  

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Kim has a ton of shit left at that house for being moved out for what - a year? Even one of the kids said, "Kinda like a hoarder." If I were Barry, I'd be like "take ALL of it, for real, and your little dog, too!!!!"

When Mr. Lightning moved out when our kids were 6 and 10 years old (he came back a year later, tail between his legs), he had the foresight to do so when we were out of town. We came back and he'd set up a new bed in the master bedroom for me and it was depressing but at least the children didn't have to witness it. I cannot imagine him asking them to help box up his shit as he was out the door. Kim is a special kind of asshole for doing this to them. I cannot stand manipulative Barry, but my heartstrings were pulled at the end of his talking head when he said that some children had never heard their fathers say "I love you" to them, and I am glad he's recognizing that and his kids' feelings.

So are the younger kids bouncing back and forth between Florida and Georgia now that Kim's shacking up with her new boyf? Love how he is so incomprehensible that he needs subtitles over half the time. 🙄

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Nothing else to be said that's not been said above, other than repeating, 'Olivia, get the fuck outta there now and never ever look back! It's not you, it's them. All of them. They're a toxic AF family and you WILL find your soul mate one day, and it will make your head spin how great it is compared to the shit show that was your marriage to manboy Ethan and his toxic AF family.' Go girl! I hope she goes to college TBH, that would suit her so well right now. A structured environment in which it grow and learn and meet normal people.

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Okay, Kim and Mr. Airplane, we get it, you like each other.  But I would like to see far fewer cringey awkward poses in front of the kitchen sink while you discuss whether or not to move in together.  They look like two 7th graders at a school dance during a slow song.

I wonder who the Plath kids are going to gang up on once Olivia is out of the picture?

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Olivia and Ethan behaved with far more dignity in their final talk together than almost every other reality couple I have seen. They were not screaming or swearing at each other and I appreciated it. I’m very glad that they realized how incompatible they are now before they had children.

I don’t know what made Ethan revert back to the teachings of his childhood about how men are always in charge and women should do as they’re told but I’m happy Olivia realized she could never again live that way or raise children in those beliefs.

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Excellent points, Shelbie.  The show has been careful not to explain exactly the religious differences between Ethan and Olivia.  I'd been leaning towards her losing her faith entirely, which for sure would be a big deal for Ethan going forward with raising children.  

But this episode made me wonder if it was more just that Olivia has gone from deep fundamentalist beliefs to a more liberal Christian faith.  

That thought only occurred to me when Ethan made his "When have you last cooked me a meal, Woman?" comment.  I think Olivia knew, in that exact moment, it was hopeless for her to stay married to Ethan.  He'd seemed to have made a lot of progress in life but suddenly made clear that the patriarchy drilled into him growing up had cemented inside him, deep inside.  

If Olivia actually still holds to the basic tenants of the Christian faith, that remark was an extremely stupid one for Ethan to make, as it was the nail in the coffin for his marriage.  Either:

1.  Ethan is an idiot.

2. Olivia is now an agnostic or atheist or holds to a non-Christian faith. 

3. Ethan was just desperate to touch back to the more predictable (yet toxic) ways of his youth given all the recent turmoil in his marriage and the painful rejection of his family.  

I did like how Ethan earlier explained to Moriah (and the cameras) how much the Plaths contributed to damaging his marriage right out of the gate.  Their toxicity couldn't help but seep into their young relationship.  At first Kim was threatened that Olivia might lessen her control over the family.  Then later the entire family saw Olivia as a convenient scapegoat given the implosion related to Barry and Kim's divorce.  Even Ethan recognized the scapegoating part, and expressed it well.  

It will be very interesting to see what happens next, particularly if Ethan returns to and embraces his family as they surely will expect.  But one thing for sure, as someone else wisely pointed out earlier, is that the Platts will be in a huge need of a new scapegoat.  They will do anything but face the facts of their own harmful acts and the destruction left in the wake.  

In the meantime, I agree that Olivia should prosper.  I look forward to watching that happen.  

 

Edited by Fouts
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I haven’t made it through the entire episode yet, but Olivia is right to break away from a culture that she is no longer comfortable with, with people who are unwilling and unable to accept who she has become because of the dissonance of her outlook with their dogma.  

Her husband rejects all that she has become and the only way to stay together is for HER to make all the changes, while he continues to be who he has been?  Nope, that’s not how a relationship survives.

And the convenient forgetting what happened with the music with Moriah shows she hasn’t got a clue of how to interact with people.  Ethan had no reason to mis-remember some thing he witnessed between Olivia and Moriah.  Moriah is a worthless piece of trash.

Edited by b2H
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On 12/8/2023 at 4:12 PM, Fouts said:

Excellent points, Shelbie.  The show has been careful not to explain exactly the religious differences between Ethan and Olivia.  I'd been leaning towards her losing her faith entirely, which for sure would be a big deal for Ethan going forward with raising children.  

I'm 83 and was a devout Catholic until age 24.  I went to local Catholic schools and maintain great friendships with many classmates.  I continue to have questions about "losing" my faith.  I didn't lose anything. I considered what I had been taught, lived, and therefore believed--considered carefully.  I decided the concept of a god was something I could no longer accept...so, no reason to follow any religion (all though so many are interesting and I loved the "old" rituals and Latin hymns of my Catholic church...all that Latin stuff).  No bad or hurt feelings, no animosity ...a simple decision that I do not "believe."  I feel that I gained...rather than lost.  Hopefully, the same will be true for Olivia.  I'm sorry they (probably) won't follow her in the remaining series.

Edited by Back Atcha
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On 12/6/2023 at 6:08 PM, Meow Mix said:

And I know nothing about the aviation industry, so I have no idea how realistic his idea is that he will walk out of college and start working for one of the airlines. 

There are many paths to working as a pilot for a "major" airline...but it seems that most without military flying experience start at small regional airlines--not always as a pilot.  That would probably be a good fit for the Isaac we know.  Who KNOWS what college will do for the young man? Hopefully, Kim can stay out of his education experience.

Edited by Back Atcha
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12 hours ago, Quof said:

I can't believe Ethan and Olivia had the actual (as opposed to re-enacted) "Let's Get a Divorce" discussion on camera.  But famewhores gotta famewhore, I guess.  

I would be willing to bet they didn't have a choice.  From what other TLC reality stars have said in interviews, once you sign that contract, TLC has the right to film those moments if they want.

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On 12/12/2023 at 10:59 AM, Pattycake2 said:

The entire Plath family disgusts me.  I don’t think there will be another season.  This show is done.

Oh that's what we said about Sister Wives and LPBW but here we are!  😎

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22 hours ago, Salacious Kitty said:

Following Ethan post separation is a built in plot. 

I feel like him falling down and praying at Barry's feet three times a day to earn his way back into the cult will get old pretty quick. 

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On 12/7/2023 at 11:02 AM, lightninggirl said:

So are the younger kids bouncing back and forth between Florida and Georgia now that Kim's shacking up with her new boyf? Love how he is so incomprehensible that he needs subtitles over half the time. 

I feel bad for Kim's new beau. I think he's an older, lonely man looking for a decent woman. But I think Kim saw him, was impressed that he's a pilot and saw the wealth he probably has in his savings account. She then determined HE what she NEEDS for her next adventure. For Kim it's always been about money. I just hope he doesn't go bankrupt for her. The younger kids will end up fine, because of their siblings. Kim and Barry sure as hell have never been helpful.

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On 12/11/2023 at 7:27 PM, Ziggy said:

I would be willing to bet they didn't have a choice.  From what other TLC reality stars have said in interviews, once you sign that contract, TLC has the right to film those moments if they want.

It was really a sad conversation because the whole time Olivia was speaking, she made complete sense. Why couldn't Ethan wrap his head around this? That's where I completely blame Kim and Barry for their smothering and judgmental religion, up until the kids move out. It's so archaic and unhealthy.

I guess Ethan is so stubborn, he would rather punish himself than agree to change his mind. He's going to be one of those who cuts off his nose to spite his face.

Mariah disgusts me. It's clear I'm not the only one who knows she's blatantly lying about Olivia. Why she made that post denouncing Olivia and the credit card story baffles me. Ethan confirmed what his mother was doing. And WHY is Lydia backing up this lying narrative when she wasn't even old enough to know what the hell was going on? I understand Lydia is immersed in her religion and tries to behave 'Godly' but she's beyond help. Why is it that religious families are often the most hypocritical? No wonder it messes up their kids.

Final rant... I have not seen one child to be able to write a complete sentence that's legible. Lydia's scratchings on her prayer closet, Micah's grocery list, Ethan's notes to Olivia, are horrendous. Good luck to Isaac getting into college if he's anything like the others. Is Ethan capable of doing any other work then mechanics? Thank goodness he loves doing it.

Ethan is going to regret this divorce especially in years to come. Olivia will flourish and thrive.

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On 12/7/2023 at 3:06 AM, Quof said:

A neighbour had her kids help her take the garbage to the curb before they left for school.  Except the garbage bags contained her suitcases, and as soon as the kids left, her new boyfriend picked her up and she was gone.  

(While I'm typing this, I am hoping my comments don't get merged. I hate that)

I have to admit that this story shocks me. The only times I've heard this account (of a woman leaving her children) is usually when the woman is missing and presumably dead and her husband insists that she ran off with her new boyfriend. I've never actually seen it in real life, or known any female who's left her children for a "man". (What man would want a woman who disposes of loved ones so readily?)

Even Kim expected Barry to leave the house until her daughters reminded her that she's the one that wants out, so she should be the one to leave.

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On 12/16/2023 at 8:36 PM, Chalby said:

I feel bad for Kim's new beau. I think he's an older, lonely man looking for a decent woman. But I think Kim saw him, was impressed that he's a pilot and saw the wealth he probably has in his savings account. She then determined HE what she NEEDS for her next adventure. For Kim it's always been about money. I just hope he doesn't go bankrupt for her. The younger kids will end up fine, because of their siblings. Kim and Barry sure as hell have never been helpful.

Don't. He's a racist PoS: https://starcasm.net/kim-plaths-boyfriend-ken-palmers-controversial-facebook-posts/

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Kim manipulated her children since the day they were born. Kept them uneducated and made sure they lacked any critical thinking skills.
Sadly I’m not surprised the children covered for them.

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That podcast was eye opening even though the host gave too much of her own observations instead of follow up questions.  So, Ethan is a homophone who drinks too much.  Olivia and Ethan argued throughout their European vacation. Lydia’s first crush that we witnessed was a brother of Olivia.  

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(edited)
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"To Be Or Not To Be". Ethan and Moriah's feud comes to a head as they hash out past disagreements; Kim moves the remainder of her things out of the family home; Ethan and Olivia have an honest conversation about the future of their relationship.

Ever the masochist, I only watched this because I didn't feel like seeing what was currently on every channel. 

  • Ethan and Moriah talk about that thing with her "music". What's she doing with the Plath men weekend in California? I must have zoned out last week or something. Moriah continues to deny taking responsibility for the whole "stolen" "music" thing. BTW, is it me or are her arm tattoos growing every week? I swear she more of them every time I see her! 
  • Kim drops by to pick up the kids and the rest of her stuff. Where the hell is she going to put it? I don't remember her apartment over her "dance studio" being very big. Why are they dividing up the family photos? Do they not understand how film cameras work? They can print or make copies! Kim and Barry argue about whose train set it is.
  • Lydia, while in her walk-in prayer closet, tells us about her secret boyfriend that Kim and Barry approve her seeing. Wait, what?
  • Ethan and Olivia discuss their marriage. At this point, I just fast-forwarded thru it because I couldn't care less.
  • Kim brings the kids back to the farmhouse and makes a snide remark about Barry having to "step up his game". Bitch, please!
Edited by Gharlane
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On 12/16/2023 at 8:55 PM, Chalby said:

I've never actually seen it in real life or known any female who's left her children for a "man". (What man would want a woman who disposes of loved ones so readily?)

My ex actually hooked up at a high school reunion with his old sweetheart who left her husband and six-year-old child to move halfway across the country with him, so it happens.

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On 12/16/2023 at 5:46 PM, Chalby said:

Final rant... I have not seen one child to be able to write a complete sentence that's legible. Lydia's scratchings on her prayer closet, Micah's grocery list, Ethan's notes to Olivia, are horrendous. Good luck to Isaac getting into college if he's anything like the others. Is Ethan capable of doing any other work then mechanics? Thank goodness he loves doing it.

Ethan is going to regret this divorce especially in years to come. Olivia will flourish and thrive.

I have to respond to my own post because I have gradually felt bad for what I wrote.

I still believe Kim shortchanged her kids when it comes to education and academics, but I feel especially bad for the older kids because their responses, or ways of coping when things go badly, are all a result of being taught only one way of dealing with life and daily challenges.

I imagine whenever they approached a parent to ask why they were seen as "odd" or "different" by others, they were assured they were doing  life, the right way, whereas anyone different was either jealous or heading down a path to Hell. But then Micah, Ethan and Moriah suddenly realized no one else was bursting into flames for drinking soda or wearing shorts. I feel bad when they watch their younger siblings enjoying activities that they were denied. The oldest siblings had the hardest time navigating puberty, and life in general. I hope they take advantage of therapy.

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