Life After Lockup: Season 5 LIVE CHAT

[Pepper Mostly]

"Alternative motives". Dead.

[WaltersHair]

When I was growing up Shawn was a 'girl' name and Sean was a boys. I need to work on my Shawns

[OoogleEyes]

Oh. So fucking SHAWN is the victim here?

[kacesq]

Just now, SemiCharmedLife said:

So, he didn't explain the saying?  I must be a bit dense.

You and me both.

[goofygirl]

Shawn, you're such a moron! You should trust... the hot tub in the living room.  Trust that the hot tub's gonna spring a leak and your house is gonna flood.

Trust that your MIL has terrible thoughts about you and doesn't want you and Sarah to make it long term.  Trust that she's pulling for Abby's DAD and not you.  

Trust that you don't have two brain cells to rub together when it comes to women.

There you go!

[PrincessPurrsALot]

3 hours ago, Eldemarge said:

I came in my ninja suit and my faux fur coat and I am ready to throw hands !

Did you bring your sisters?  We all know that when one invites family, that means they are ready to fight.

[kacesq]

Wait…Aris is pregnant too????

[Ladystardust]

Just now, WaltersHair said:

When I was growing up Shawn was a 'girl' name and Sean was a boys. I need to work on my Shawns

I had a Shawn, Shaun, and Sean in my class. All boys.

[Empress1]

Did we know Aris was pregnant?!

[Auntie Anxiety]

OMG. Aris, stop being so fucking stoopid.

[goofygirl]

OMG!!  Cameron is already at the ultrasound with whatsherface??? Jeebus.

He wants a BOY and it's a GIRL.

Wave buh-bye Cam.  See you back in the jailhouse.

Edited April 8, 2023 by goofygirl

[Pepper Mostly]

1 minute ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Tickets to smack Shawn in the head with a 2x4 are on sale NOW. 

Line to the left, please, no pushing! Everyone will get a turn! 

Cameron is putting on his big boy pants. His big boy GUCCI pants. 

[kacesq]

All these people deciding to get pregnant with no steady jobs, brand new relationships….

[Empress1]

Just now, Ladystardust said:

I had a Shawn, Shaun, and Sean in my class. All boys.

Sean and Shawn were in my class, Shaun was a year below. I dated the Shaun.

[SemiCharmedLife]

"How can you forget Cameron?"  WTF???

[LEILANI2]

Aris already has a little boy too.

[JenE4]

I thought they were going to a spa. This is a boutique ultrasound place?! What will they think of next.

[Pepper Mostly]

2 minutes ago, kacesq said:

Wait…Aris is pregnant too????

Jesus, who isn't? Well, I'm not, that's for sure. 

1 minute ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

OMG. Aris, stop being so fucking stoopid.

Deep sigh. Alas, I fear that ship has sailed. 

[Gobi]

Just now, Pepper Mostly said:

Jesus, who isn't? Well, I'm not, that's for sure. 

Only because you're not in the same state as Shawn.

[Auntie Anxiety]

Cameron has a new career in customer service? “Do want fries with that?”

[kacesq]

I think Monique and Lindsay are the only two women in this season who are not knocked up by their current beaus….

[Gobi]

Just now, kacesq said:

I think Monique and Lindsay are the only two women in this season who are not knocked up by their current beaus….

The season isn't over yet.

[goofygirl]

2 minutes ago, SemiCharmedLife said:

"How can you forget Cameron?"  WTF???

No, it's dumbass Aris' name I forgot.

[Eldemarge]

Just now, kacesq said:

I think Monique and Lindsay are the only two women in this season who are not knocked up by their current beaus….

Not for lack of trying, I'm sure.

[OoogleEyes]

4 minutes ago, Ladystardust said:

HAHAHAHAHA. No.

omg. I'm so lost. 

Did he say BEEF?? 

[kacesq]

Gravel? Gravel to my father?

[WaltersHair]

Grahvel. Dear Lord. Or Gavl?

Edited April 8, 2023 by WaltersHair

[Pepper Mostly]

Just now, Gobi said:

Only because you're not in the same state as Shawn.

And I'm 68 and many, MANY years post menopause. Thank all the gods in the pantheon. Not even Shawn's super sperm could gain any purchase in my dusty, abandoned baby factory.

[kacesq]

I can’t believe Mama June still has a show. Ugh. Oh God no. Not a sneak peek. 

[SemiCharmedLife]

Cam, please don't gravel to Aris' father.

[Gobi]

Just now, SemiCharmedLife said:

Cam, please don't gravel to Aris' father.

Especially when you're stoned.

[goofygirl]

1 minute ago, kacesq said:

I think Monique and Lindsay are the only two women in this season who are not knocked up by their current beaus….

But wait.... Monique has a "secret"... Apparently, Lindsey is the ONLY woman on this show that can manage some birth control.  Dang!  That puts HER at the top of the class!

[Pepper Mostly]

2 minutes ago, kacesq said:

I think Monique and Lindsay are the only two women in this season who are not knocked up by their current beaus….

I will bet anyone here a shiny quarter that either Lindsay or Monique is up the spout before the season ends. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Just now, goofygirl said:

But wait.... Monique has a "secret"... Apparently, Lindsey is the ONLY woman on this show that can manage some birth control.  Dang!  That puts HER at the top of the class!

The bar gets lower and lower as the weeks go by.

[WaltersHair]

I can't even imagine the hormonal swings Lindsay would have.

[Pepper Mostly]

2 minutes ago, SemiCharmedLife said:

Cam, please don't gravel to Aris' father.

He might think you have alternative motives. 

[OoogleEyes]

5 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Line to the left, please, no pushing! Everyone will get a turn! 

Cameron is putting on his big boy pants. His big boy GUCCI pants. 

I'm still waiting in line to punch that other guy in the throat 

[goofygirl]

2 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

And I'm 68 and many, MANY years post menopause. Thank all the gods in the pantheon. Not even Shawn's super sperm could gain any purchase in my dusty, abandoned baby factory.

I see your 68 and raise you a complete hysterectomy!

[Ladystardust]

Just now, OoogleEyes said:

omg. I'm so lost. 

Lol - it might have been his kid. I was joking 😃

Just now, Pepper Mostly said:

I will bet anyone here a shiny quarter that either Lindsay or Monique is up the spout before the season ends. 

Didn't monique already have a pregnancy scare? Was that ever resolved with an actual test?

[Auntie Anxiety]

Amber looks just like her mother. 

[JenE4]

4 minutes ago, SemiCharmedLife said:

Cam, please don't gravel to Aris' father.

They have a rocky relationship!

[kacesq]

“Except $50k”…. Oh is that all? 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Amber seems like the perfect person to go into business with. And she can get Puppy to be the coat check girl.

Edited April 8, 2023 by Auntie Anxiety

[Empress1]

“It’s good wholesome shit.” HA!

[Pepper Mostly]

Just now, Ladystardust said:

 

Didn't monique already have a pregnancy scare? Was that ever resolved with an actual test?

Well, we've been treated to the sight of her peed-on pregnancy test. But there's no limit. I'm sure the gang in the Sharp writer's room are happy to trot out the "omigod is (fill in the blank) pregnant? STAY TUNED!" one more time. 

Where are Amber's parents going to get $50K?? 

[Gobi]

Just one word Amber - "powerwashing".

[kacesq]

Wait…is this their house? I don’t remember this log cabin.

[Pepper Mostly]

Just now, kacesq said:

“Except $50k”…. Oh is that all? 

A mere bagatelle. 

[Empress1]

I feel like every time we see Blaine and Lindsey, they live in a different place.

[PrincessPurrsALot]

2 minutes ago, goofygirl said:

I see your 68 and raise you a complete hysterectomy!

I am sure Shawn's miracle sperm can reactivate ovaries and fill them with eggs.  It may be strong enough to grow a whole new uterus.