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S01.E05: Under the Bubbles


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After Jess burns herself, Captain Kerry lends a hand to prepare a five-star picnic for the guests' excursion; Nathan leads guests on an epic biking adventure; Lewis faces the pressure of being a man down for another charter.

Airdate: 11.29.2022

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Like someone (me) who apparently missed the first half of the episode, these comments are in the order of scenes broadcast…

Lewis and Mike in a pissing contest – literally.  Keep keeping it classy, Bravo!

Nathan saves the day by baring it all – or at least from the waist up!  It’s all about the tip!

Oriana – “I like dating people in positions of power.”  And that explains a lot.  Too much, really.

I can’t believe there’s such trouble finding another deckhand – is there really that much of a labour shortage in Norway?   What happened to the Viking spirit?

The Great Suitcase Caper – so you had to wait 30 minutes for a bag?  Really?  I can’t even begin to count the hours I’ve spent at airports waiting for my bag – and that’s traveling First Class Priority.  Have a drink and chill and enjoy the view of Norway.

This is only matched by the Great Epaulet Caper.  Chavette Faye is outraged.  You can only tell by what she says, because the botox masks any actual facial expression.

So some of the (Chav) crew bitches because they think the tip isn’t big enough?  That’s like the Fox raiding the chicken coup complaining the chickens aren’t fat enough.  And speaking…

What will happen next week?  Will Chavette Faye wreak havoc on Oriana?  Will Jess do more yoga?  Will Nathan take off his shirt again?  Stay tuned…

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Loved how the chef called the deck guy in a panic about a missing cooler box while he is barreling down the side of mountain on a bicycle with the passengers while the box was in the van.

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The scenery is the real star of this show. The shots of that roadway were absolutely breathtaking. I don't have any fear of heights, myself, but even I might hesitate to bike down a road like that. Yeesh.

I'm inclined to dislike Oriana but what I'm piecing together sounds like production shenanigans. Last week she said her "contract" was for second stew. I've not heard crew members refer to contracts before; my guess would be she's referring to her contract with Bravo, rather than a yachting company. Which means she came aboard with the understanding she was supposed to be second stew. I don't know how this works, whether they are told their position is ultimately up to the chief stew or just what. But she did not ask Lewis to order her new epaulets. He said there was a mistake with his and asked her if there were any mistakes with the stews and she said "mine only has one stripe." He then said he would order another for her. Faye, meanwhile has gotten it into her head that Oriana went to Lewis and asked him to order her new epaulets. I hope they clear this up. I don't think they will, to my satisfaction, because they don't really get into the mechanics of how Bravo assigns various positions.

Jenn's burn wasn't really that bad, I think she was panicking more from stress than the burn. She's starting to look a bit like a drama queen.

So what's going on "under the bubbles?" Are we talking full on sex or just hand stuff? And there, I've just lost respect for Lewis and Oriana. Not that I had much to begin with.

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31 minutes ago, iMonrey said:

So what's going on "under the bubbles?" Are we talking full on sex or just hand stuff? And there, I've just lost respect for Lewis and Oriana. Not that I had much to begin with.

I'm telling myself that it just meant he was having a . . . reaction to having her feet on his face. (which is disgusting enough -- ugh) Please don't tell me any different.

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When they show the shots of them getting out of bed, pay attention to Jess.  It looks like she has a full custom down comforter, navy blue and silver and sleeps in a full length gown.  Everyone else on Below Deck* crawls into their bunks in underwear and T shirts.

If I was Mike, no way I would have answered my radio while biking down that road.  His job was to look out for the guests.

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2 hours ago, iMonrey said:

Jenn's burn wasn't really that bad, I think she was panicking more from stress than the burn. She's starting to look a bit like a drama queen.

What?!  Her entire palm was blistered and it must have hurt like hell because she was crying.  And OF COURSE it was the useless bosun's fault.  And I thought all chefs were drama queens.  lol

Why weren't they cycling in single file?  The had vehicles stacking up behind them.  Drinking game - every time Jess says 'cooler box.'

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3 hours ago, Oosala said:

Why weren't they cycling in single file?  The had vehicles stacking up behind them.  Drinking game - every time Jess says 'cooler box.'

I thought those vehicles belonged to the production company. Since they encountered no traffic on the (country's most famous) road, I figured it must have been blocked off. 

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I think the two vans behind the cyclists were part of the production team. The first to transport the cyclists and the bicycles up to the starting point the second with photographers and the drone operator. I'm sure they were there to keep the cast safe for short stretches on the road.

I love Norway having bicycled with my boyfriend from Bergen to Oslo when I was younger. My current bf and I travel by ship quite frequently and take either our folding kayaks or folding bikes on board with us so we can explore while in port. After seeing this episode I have started looking for taxis which could transport us to the top of Trollstigen. So far have found that it is a popular cycling route "only six 1/2 miles with a 7.8% gradient" but I'm older and lazier now.

Former husband and I did Hardknott pass on our tandem but that was shorter and less of a gradient. Yep it will be a taxi to the top for us. Can Americans please stop screaming while they are experiencing a foreign country? This lot was no different and is a bad look.

"

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What?!  Her entire palm was blistered and it must have hurt like hell because she was crying. 

I didn't see that, but maybe I missed it. What I saw didn't look that bad to me. Also? She's a chef. Don't tell me she's never burned her hand before. Or cut her hand.

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The Chief Stew is a crazy  bundle of nerves & paranoia. She acts like it’s the  first time she’s ever done this.  I kind of think that though Oriana  hasn’t exactly proven to be a star stew, perhaps temperamentally she may be a less uptight manager.  Nathan was the star of the show but I resent the fact that they were sexualizing him - very disrespectful, even if he did say he’d do anything for a good tip.

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Faye thinks Oriana asked for a second stripe.   Oriana thinks she signed on as chief or second stew at least.

Bravo thinks these women arguing about rank and status is good drama.

Now it seems the cast is expected to hook up with each other.  The women were talking about which male cast they fit with.  On another BD show, the guests were doing that, asking the female stews which male deckhands they liked.

It's like the female cast are playing musical chairs and the male cast are the chairs so they have to decide right away which ones they want, not let things happen organically, if it happens at all.

I've never watched The Bachelor but I watched UnREAL.  These people who go on shows like The Bachelor seems to be expected to have "dates" including sex during the course of the season.  Now BD seems to have a similar expectation, that cast members hook up every season.

Well at least Bravo only casts single people, right?

From their POV, they don't want the cast to hook up with locals or guests.  They want hookups between casts, so they can milk it for multiple episodes.

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Love Captain Kerry and how he jumped in and helped chef after she burned her hand.

How did those charter guests do that bike ride?  I really thought some of them would bail once they saw how long and steep it was.  Maybe it looked more daunting than it was.

I hope this gets better.  I had high hopes for this series as it is Norway and the views have been spectacular!  The crew.....er...not so much.  Oh who am I kidding?  I will watch it to the bitter end. 

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2 minutes ago, gaPeach said:

How did those charter guests do that bike ride?  I really thought some of them would bail once they saw how long and steep it was.  Maybe it looked more daunting than it was.

Was really slow.  

So far it's not thrill-seeking guests, they look like guests on every other BD show.

They made it sound like the guests would be doing base jumping or scaling 1000 foot cliff faces.

Some of the hikes up the fjords would take over 4 hours, very tiring.  Doubt anyone is going to be doing anything like that.

Maybe we will see some zip lining and parasailing.

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Nathan was the star of the show but I resent the fact that they were sexualizing him - very disrespectful, even if he did say he’d do anything for a good tip.

This show has a long history of pimping out the shirtless deckies. I'm sure they're made aware of what's expected of them when they sign up for this.

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3 hours ago, iMonrey said:
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Nathan was the star of the show but I resent the fact that they were sexualizing him - very disrespectful, even if he did say he’d do anything for a good tip.

This show has a long history of pimping out the shirtless deckies. I'm sure they're made aware of what's expected of them when they sign up for this.

I think they discreetly warn them.  I can't image they come right out and say "We will require you to strip, twerk and grind on guests".  He looked very uncomfortable preforming in front of the guests.  Would the girls be required to do the same.  Oh wait, ummm yeah they would.  Never mind. 

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The chef is probably one of the whiniest in this whole franchise, she is really getting on my nerves. She just kept on & on about burning her hand letting everyone know how wonderful she was for carrying on, fucking martyr. You're a chef & if you don't burn yourself as a chef at least every other week you're not really trying. I was a butcher for a few years & everyone cut themselves at least once a week, sometimes very badly and all I ever heard was a shout of "FUCK!!!!!" and back to work unless parts of limbs or actual limbs were missing.

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I think she was more worried that it would impair her and she had a lot of work to do.

I really wonder the motivations for experienced yacht chefs to come on the show.

OK, maybe the visibility gets them some gigs or other opportunities, like as private chefs.

Otherwise, why do they care if these fake guests are satisfied or not.  They usually are, they're not some haut cuisine snobs.

Honestly, why not more cases of chefs mailing it in like that one who made the taco salad on BDM?

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Not surprised in the least at the tip. There was nothing they could do to please Lauran, who just seemed to go out of her way to be a pain in the ass — always looking like she was smelling something foul, too. Largely unpleasant bunch. Goodbye.

Where was the crew with the luggage? Mike sitting at the table eating —”wut… they want their luggage?” Crunch crunch. 🙄 I wonder if that last-minute screw up affected the tip.

Lewis…what a dumbass, LOL. First Kyle walks over him, now it’s clear Oriana is using him to get what she wants. If I were Faye, I’d take that stripe as soon as it comes in. He overstepped bounds big time with that, as well as started drama. He needs to work on running his own department. 

I once burned my arm on a large baking sheet that was being used as a makeshift oven rack. Hurt like HELL. I could feel Jess’s pain, but the chef can’t quit. 

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On 12/4/2022 at 1:19 PM, aghst said:

I think she was more worried that it would impair her and she had a lot of work to do.

I really wonder the motivations for experienced yacht chefs to come on the show.

OK, maybe the visibility gets them some gigs or other opportunities, like as private chefs.

Otherwise, why do they care if these fake guests are satisfied or not.  They usually are, they're not some haut cuisine snobs.

Honestly, why not more cases of chefs mailing it in like that one who made the taco salad on BDM?

I believe Ben Robinson parlayed his BD experience into doing cooking demonstrations and personal appearances, as well as being a private chef. One — I believe Adrian — went to work as a chef for a wealthy family.

The BD chefs are increasingly being put in no-win situations. With every season the demands guests put on them get more ridiculous. They need help, like they would have on shore. I don’t know why it’s a one-person show on the boats, when so much rides on the quality of the food. 

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1 hour ago, RoseAllDay said:

I believe Ben Robinson parlayed his BD experience into doing cooking demonstrations and personal appearances, as well as being a private chef. One — I believe Adrian — went to work as a chef for a wealthy family.

The BD chefs are increasingly being put in no-win situations. With every season the demands guests put on them get more ridiculous. They need help, like they would have on shore. I don’t know why it’s a one-person show on the boats, when so much rides on the quality of the food. 

I think the producers come up with those demands, pretty much author much or all of the preference sheets.  They may get input from the guests but they're trying to shape the sheets to produce stress for the crew, in the belief that it makes good television.

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The chef is probably one of the whiniest in this whole franchise, she is really getting on my nerves. She just kept on & on about burning her hand letting everyone know how wonderful she was for carrying on, fucking martyr. You're a chef & if you don't burn yourself as a chef at least every other week you're not really trying. 

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 Her entire palm was blistered and it must have hurt like hell because she was crying. 

I went back and looked at this. You couldn't really see her hand, both times they showed it she was running it under water or sticking it in a bowl of ice, and then it was wrapped up. However, in the talking head sequences her hand was fine and no longer wrapped up. I don't know how long after the fact those interview portions are done. She seemed to be fine the next day too so I don't think it was that serious.

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On 12/4/2022 at 11:26 AM, Welshman in Ca said:

The chef is probably one of the whiniest in this whole franchise, she is really getting on my nerves. She just kept on & on about burning her hand letting everyone know how wonderful she was for carrying on, fucking martyr. You're a chef & if you don't burn yourself as a chef at least every other week you're not really trying. I was a butcher for a few years & everyone cut themselves at least once a week, sometimes very badly and all I ever heard was a shout of "FUCK!!!!!" and back to work unless parts of limbs or actual limbs were missing.

I can’t imagine that the chefs palm had blistered and open otherwise I don’t think she would be handling food without a glove.

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On 11/30/2022 at 10:23 AM, iMonrey said:

The scenery is the real star of this show. The shots of that roadway were absolutely breathtaking. I don't have any fear of heights, myself, but even I might hesitate to bike down a road like that. Yeesh.

I'm inclined to dislike Oriana but what I'm piecing together sounds like production shenanigans. Last week she said her "contract" was for second stew. I've not heard crew members refer to contracts before; my guess would be she's referring to her contract with Bravo, rather than a yachting company. Which means she came aboard with the understanding she was supposed to be second stew. I don't know how this works, whether they are told their position is ultimately up to the chief stew or just what. But she did not ask Lewis to order her new epaulets. He said there was a mistake with his and asked her if there were any mistakes with the stews and she said "mine only has one stripe." He then said he would order another for her. Faye, meanwhile has gotten it into her head that Oriana went to Lewis and asked him to order her new epaulets. I hope they clear this up. I don't think they will, to my satisfaction, because they don't really get into the mechanics of how Bravo assigns various positions.

Jenn's burn wasn't really that bad, I think she was panicking more from stress than the burn. She's starting to look a bit like a drama queen.

So what's going on "under the bubbles?" Are we talking full on sex or just hand stuff? And there, I've just lost respect for Lewis and Oriana. Not that I had much to begin with.

It was definitely some gross hand stuff under the bubbles.  In the next episode Lewis says “somebody needs to clean that hot tub.”  
 

Really, she gives him a handy the first time they kiss??

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On 12/4/2022 at 12:19 PM, aghst said:

I think she was more worried that it would impair her and she had a lot of work to do.

I really wonder the motivations for experienced yacht chefs to come on the show.

OK, maybe the visibility gets them some gigs or other opportunities, like as private chefs.

Otherwise, why do they care if these fake guests are satisfied or not.  They usually are, they're not some haut cuisine snobs.

Honestly, why not more cases of chefs mailing it in like that one who made the taco salad on BDM?

Are you referring to chef Mila the steak licker??

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On 12/5/2022 at 2:42 PM, RoseAllDay said:

Lewis…what a dumbass, LOL. First Kyle walks over him, now it’s clear Oriana is using him to get what she wants. If I were Faye, I’d take that stripe as soon as it comes in. He overstepped bounds big time with that, as well as started drama. He needs to work on running his own department.

So much YES to this.  He is such an ass.

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