S01.E02: The Weddings

[zxy556575]

Hey, producers? Way to cheap out with the chintzy banquet room for 40 and cut-rate high school minister. The leftover tables and furniture stacked in the hallway was a nice touch.

[crgirl412]

Year, I thought the same!  Also, the room the ceremony took place in reminded me of funeral home!!  I'm loving the show!!  Better than any Bachelor/ette show! 

 

I'm loving Courtney & Jason b/c they are are into each other!  I love Monet & Vaughn!  I like how shy she is with him and didn't kiss until she was ready! 

 

Doug & Jamie- Wow.   I think Jamie was a good sport and didn't really reveal her true feelings.  Aren't they going to be in counseling with experts from the get go?  It seemed like it was optional from the preview.   I so identify with Jamie but mine was worse as I really, really liked the guy.  There were several points that were so hard to watch.

 

About 7 years ago I met a guy online who was an amazing person in every way but I had 0 attraction for him and found him even hard to look at in person. We were in different cities so I didn't get a truly good look at him until he came to visit me.  I really tried, I did.  We kept talking/emailing after he left, and still really liking almost everything about him, I went to his city to visit him but I knew while there that it wasn't going to work for me.  We were both committed Christians so to have literally all of the spiritual stuff line up and not have that one seemingly shallow thing not be there was even more painful.  I cried out to God asking Him to make me attracted to this man but He didn't.  When Jamie said, "I feel so bad."  I teared up.  That is the worst feeling to have.  All you want is to feel something positive in that area and it seems so shallow but the chemistry/attraction thing is so key that not having it devastating. 

 

That being said, I wonder if I had seen this show 7 years ago, would I have ended it or stuck with it longer?  Who knows.  I'm still single and he is married to a women he met on that same site and I hope and pray he is very happy.   

Edited July 16, 2014 by crgirl412

[MMLEsq]

Year, I thought the same!  Also, the room the ceremony took place in reminded me of funeral home!!  I'm loving the show!!  Better than any Bachelor/ette show! 

 

I'm loving Courtney & Jason b/c they are are into each other!  I love Monet & Vaughn!  I like how shy she is with him and didn't kiss until she was ready! 

 

Doug & Jamie- Wow.   I think Jamie was a good sport and didn't really reveal her true feelings.  Aren't they going to be in counseling with experts from the get go?  It seemed like it was optional from the preview.   I so identify with Jamie but mine was worse as I really, really liked the guy.  There were several points that were so hard to watch.

 

About 7 years ago I met a guy online who was an amazing person in every way but I had 0 attraction for him and found him even hard to look at in person. We were in different cities so I didn't get a truly good look at him until he came to visit me.  I really tried, I did.  We kept talking/emailing after he left, and still really liking almost everything about him, I went to his city to visit him but I knew while there that it wasn't going to work for me.  We were both committed Christians so to have literally all of the spiritual stuff line up and not have that one seemingly shallow thing not be there was even more painful.  I cried out the God asking Him to make me attracted to this man but He didn't.  When Jamie said, "I feel so bad."  I teared up.  That is the worst feeling to have.  All you want is to feel something positive in that area and it seems so shallow but the chemistry/attraction thing is so key that not having it devastating. 

 

That being said, I wonder if I had seen this show 7 years ago, would I have ended it or stuck with it longer?  Who knows.  I'm still single and he is married to a women he met on that same site and I hope and pray he is very happy.   

I am also loving this show -- as I said in one of the other threads:  I find the whole premise fascinating.

 

Initial reactions -- Jason and Cortney definitely seemed to click the best.  They were clearly being affectionate with each other, they were acting like a team - like "okay, we're in this together," and there didn't appear to be any red flags.  (Although the scene with Jason and his friends while they were ribbing him about the honeymoon and he was all (I'm totally paraphrasing) "Oh, you know it's going to be wild!" was a little presumptuous.)  Doug and Jamie was painful to watch.  I can understand her initial reaction, but she even admitted that she knew that it was obvious that she was being cold and standoffish.  She didn't have to throw herself at him, but she also didn't have to keep making comments like (again, I'm totally paraphrasing), "There's no way we're kissing" while taking the photos.  I thought it was so cute that her nephew ran up, climbed in Doug's lap and called him Uncle Doug.  My husband's nephew did that at our wedding to me.  I felt bad for Monet because I'm sure worrying about your husband's initial impression of you while you're having a panic attack would only make the panic attack worse.  The man that walked Monet down the aisle - James - he's the underwear picker, right?

 

My husband and I met online back in '99, which was practically the Stone Age of Match.com.  We e-mailed for a few weeks before talking on the phone -- our first phone call lasted 7 hours! -- and finally met in person after about a month.  Getting to know him so well before meeting him (I hadn't seen any pictures) resulted in me liking his personality so much that I almost didn't care what he looked like.  To be totally honest, my initial impression when we first met was, "Hmmm....he's not the type I usually go for," but I didn't really care at that point because we were so compatible in other ways.  We've been married for 12 years now, so it definitely worked out!  So, I guess I can understand that, with no other information to go on at that point, Jamie might have been disappointed.  I wonder if her feelings would have been different if, like me, she had gotten to know Doug before seeing him for the first time.  Then again, maybe it wouldn't have been different for Jamie -- I guess it depends how important looks and physical attraction are in what you're looking for.  Every scene, though, I wondered how Doug and his family and friends are feeling about seeing what Jamie was saying.  The mean-spirited, going-to-Hell side of me almost hopes that she starts to fall for his personality and really care for him and at the end of the month, he tells her he's not interested in continuing the relationship because she's too shallow.

 

I Googled the show just now to see if they had videos on the FYI site (so I could watch those two scenes again that I paraphrased above - I couldn't; they didn't have the second episode online yet).  But, before I found the FYI site, I first clicked on the site for the Danish version of the show and it looks like there the couples have to agree to stay together for three months (instead of 30 days). 

[heebiejeebie]

Without having watched this I still find it troubling, or perhaps just telling, to hear that Jason's 'wedding' was scheduled when it was.  I think it makes Jason's attitude towards this whole thing a bit clearer.  If he can't be bothered to make sure his stage 4 cancer mother is not in attendance, no matter how contrived the whole matter is, at perhaps the only wedding she will ever attend?  I'm guessing he figured if he last the thirty days it would be a miracle.  And I think he probably did this just for the pay those thirty days probably afforded him.  At least I hope that is his reason.  Because I can't see a schmaltzy reality show about relationships on BIO's re-boot as a warmer and fuzzier FYI doing much for a wrestling career.

[MMLEsq]

Without having watched this I still find it troubling, or perhaps just telling, to hear that Jason's 'wedding' was scheduled when it was.  I think it makes Jason's attitude towards this whole thing a bit clearer.  If he can't be bothered to make sure his stage 4 cancer mother is not in attendance, no matter how contrived the whole matter is, at perhaps the only wedding she will ever attend?  I'm guessing he figured if he last the thirty days it would be a miracle.  And I think he probably did this just for the pay those thirty days probably afforded him.  At least I hope that is his reason.  Because I can't see a schmaltzy reality show about relationships on BIO's re-boot as a warmer and fuzzier FYI doing much for a wrestling career.

I may be a bit gullible when it comes to buying what reality shows are trying to sell me, but I have to say it looked -- at least to me -- like most of them (including Jason) were not going into this with that kind of attitude.  We haven't really heard (or at least I don't remember hearing) how long the screening and interview process took.  The process could have started months earlier and, during that time, Jason's mom took a turn for the worse.  It seems like the show scheduled and organized the weddings with only limited input from the actual brides and grooms, so I would guess that Jason was left with the choice of going forward or backing out of the whole thing.  And, if they really found six people (well, five if you don't count Jamie) who are trusting the process, he might not want to give up the opportunity to find out how it would work out with someone who was picked specifically to be a very good match for him.  YMMV.

 

I'm very grateful and thankful to say that I've never had cancer and it hasn't really affected my immediate family or any of my close friends, so I probably don't know what I'm talking about and this is going to sound extremely callous, but here goes:  Is there no way that 2 days after a chemo treatment his mother couldn't pull it together to sit for a 1/2 hour and attend her son's wedding?  She could have skipped the photo, reception (why did they call it a "dance party" and not just "the reception"?), and anything that wasn't the actual ceremony.  IIRC, Jill Duggard's (19 Kids & Counting) mother-in-law, who is in the late stages of cancer, wasn't able to attend the rehearsal dinner and I believe she skipped the reception, but she was at the wedding itself (in a wheelchair). There had been a lot of speculation in the days leading up to the wedding whether she would or would not be at the ceremony, but I don't remember seeing anyone suggest that Jill and Derick reschedule their wedding because of it.

[Boofish]

I'm very grateful and thankful to say that I've never had cancer and it hasn't really affected my immediate family or any of my close friends, so I probably don't know what I'm talking about and this is going to sound extremely callous, but here goes:  Is there no way that 2 days after a chemo treatment his mother couldn't pull it together to sit for a 1/2 hour and attend her son's wedding?  She could have skipped the photo, reception (why did they call it a "dance party" and not just "the reception"?), and anything that wasn't the actual ceremony.  IIRC, Jill Duggard's (19 Kids & Counting) mother-in-law, who is in the late stages of cancer, wasn't able to attend the rehearsal dinner and I believe she skipped the reception, but she was at the wedding itself (in a wheelchair). There had been a lot of speculation in the days leading up to the wedding whether she would or would not be at the ceremony, but I don't remember seeing anyone suggest that Jill and Derick reschedule their wedding because of it.

My mother battled colon cancer (and ultimately lost her battle) 2 days after chemo she barely had to strength to let someone bathe her let alone get up, make her self presentable, get in a car, take even a short car ride then sit through what a wedding let alone a TELEVISED one that may have had to stop, start, do retakes etc. Cancer and treatments effects everyone differently depending on your health and how much of it has spread and where. Perhaps she is in such a state (as my mother was) that she didn't want people gawking and staring and for her last days to be remembered on camera. I think it's perfectly reasonable to have missed his wedding. She had no way of knowing it would work out or not and I'm sorry as sweet as Jason and Courtney seemed her son agreed to marry someone he never met and I'm supposed to leave my death bed to support it? How about you bring the wedding to me.

 

Sorry if my post seemed agrumentative because I do not mean to come off that way. I guess this is just a very sensitive subject for me :)

[Lovecat]

Is there no way that 2 days after a chemo treatment his mother couldn't pull it together to sit for a 1/2 hour and attend her son's wedding?

Having watched my own mother go through chemotherapy for lung cancer, I'd say no.  Chemo targets rapidly-dividing cells, which include the healthy cells lining the gut and oral cavity.  That's why there's usually so much nausea and vomiting after a treatment, and it's pretty standard that Day 2 post-infusion, once the poisons have had 24-48 hours to make their way into the cells and start wreaking havoc, is the absolute worst.  I can't speak to Jason's motivations for continuing with the "experiment" while his mom was so sick, but I am rooting for him and Cortney to make it. 

[Primetimer]

She sure got over it in a fast hurry, though, huh.

Read the story

[crgirl412]

Mom died from Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer and the chemo wiped her out. In fact, they tell patients who are still working (or trying to) to have chemo on Thursday as it hits hard 2 days after to have the weekend to recover. Now there are lots of different kinds of chemo and I'm referring only to infusion chemo here. Interestingly and sadly, as my mom's cancer spread she was taking oral chemo in a pill- first was Tarceva then as the Tarceva failed to keep the beast at bay it was Alimta. She died in 2007 so these may now not even be used as better ones have been developed.

@MMLEsq- Congrats at meeting him online! I know several couples who met online!! It works!!! I plan on doing it again when I get some things taken care of.

After watching the Casting Special and looking up Jamie online and looking at her webpage and Facebook page it became even more clear that they so totally screwed Doug and Jamie over. Especially Doug. The one expert even said they are looking for a homebody for Doug. Jamie is a working model, she's done commercials, hosts some tv food show, her last bf took her to the Grammy's where he won an award! Yes, she's a working RN, yes, she wants a stable family but she also wants the entertainment side. She's a stereotypical Bachleor Nationite!! It really pisses me off that they left out a huge, glaring chunk of who Jamie is and where her life is like and she wants it to head!! It's public information!!

Jamie will ultimately come out of this just fine, it will increase her exposure so she'll get more work, she'll quit her RN job and be married within 1 year or planning to be but only to a hottie who is a present/former pro or semi pro-athlete or also from Bachelor Nation or another reality show, or a some other D-List- or below- celebrity.

Doug will be crushed and take awhile to get over but he too will be married with 2 years to a girl who matches his homebody like and be at his attractiveness level and they will be very happy.

The people on FB are ripping her to shreds but I blame the experts totally. Also, the people ripping her to shreds were probably never in the position of having 0 attraction to someone that they were already involved with; in her case married, in my case met online. See my story above if interested.

[zxy556575]

The people on FB are ripping her to shreds but I blame the experts totally. Also, the people ripping her to shreds were probably never in the position of having 0 attraction to someone that they were already involved with; in her case married, in my case met online.

 

If the preview scenes are true, Jamie does apparently come around, at least a little.

[ramble]

Wheee! This is so entertaining & cringe worthy & fun. I almost feel guilty for enjoying the spectacle of it, but not enough to quit watching. I've seen Jamie in action before & I have no doubt she is superficial about looks & very camera aware, but I'm not going to say anything judgmental about her in regard to attraction. It's either there or it isn't initially. If she got to know the guy slowly prior to you know, a wedding!, then attraction can possibility be built, but right off the bat it's a snap decision usually. The people I am judgmental about is the stupid experts! Anybody should have been able to tell that Jamie needed a certain type of look. I only know her from watching trash reality shows & I know that. I think she pulled herself up & did all right. I'm surprised she didn't start sobbing as opposed to crying. I loved how she started trying to sell Doug. He's funny & his family is great & he's so nice. All the while you can see that physically she is uncomfortable & put off. 

 

Jason & Courtney seemed the most at ease. I imagine part of that was the joint you're hot/I'm hot connection. I did like the common family fire fighter fact. I feel like the experts where holding out that bit of info so they could do a little dance about how great they are at their jobs. (See we can match couples. Screw you doubters.) I got married when I was 23 so this couple shouldn't seem young to me, but I'm old now so maybe that's it. They seem like such babies. I know the "coming this season" stuff is edited for drama, but the clips for J&C look like there could be trouble in the giving up single life variety.

 

Monet & Vaughn both seem unsure but willing to be open minded. Well I thought that until the this season crap was shown. Uh-oh it's trouble in reality manufactured paradise. She really did seem to be on the verge of a full blown panic attack. I felt nervous for her. I found it a bit odd that her godfather was encouraging her so strongly. He seemed determined that she carry on. My dad, right before I walked down the aisle, offered for me to back out if I wasn't sure, & I'd dated the guy two years. Of course we eventually got divorced so maybe my dad was just having a premonition. 

 

@crgirl412 I completely understand the not being able to create attraction scenario. A few years ago I met a guy online & it was a similar situation. On paper we had so much in common. We had a similar family life, common values & beliefs, enjoyed a lot of the same things, even grew up in the area, which were I live is not as common because it's growing so quickly it seems like everyone is new.  But, and it was a sad but, he just sparked nothing within me. He was nice looking & kind but it wasn't there. We stayed in touch & every so often he would want to go out but I knew he meant as a date & I also knew that I would be lying to him if I acted like that was of any interest to me. Eventually he said he couldn't talk to me anymore because I was painful for him. Sometimes I wonder if I could have pretending it into existence, but I could never convince myself to try that. 

Edited July 16, 2014 by ramble

[heebiejeebie]

I've been fighting pancreatic cancer for five years now and chemo varies.  Some days I walk a couple of miles, go to the gym even play a few matches on the weekend and three days later it smacks me like a fly swatter hitting a gnat. 

 

The thing is stage 4 cancer is incredibly iffy.  There is no way around that.  Even if she does get well, at the time, it is a looming potential death sentence.  The fact she was never on camera even though they went through the guy's home spoke volumes to me. 

 

I cannot reconcile someone fighting for her life and having her son and caregiver do something so incredibly time and emotion consuming smack dab in the middle of all this.  And I love the idea that no matter how compassionate and caring and generous a person is, she is thrilled to pieces let alone capable of taking on the role of daughter-in-law to a potentially terminal woman.  It is incredibly short sighted on all the parts of those in the know going in doing this.  Again I give Jason a slight pass because you don't think about things in the normal or proper context when you are in the midst of these things.

 

I do think Jason and Courtney make a good match.  For a one night stand.  But looking at them I also think they are too much alike.  Both like to be the center of attention.  Yes being performers is a tie.  But that is the type of tie that chafes real fast in more cases than not I think.  Most people who want to be "stars" want a supporting cast in their lives.  Not someone else vying for top billing. 

[Boofish]

Jamie's past aside, I don't see why she is such a horrible person for not finding the guy attractive. I have had men approach me in stores, resturants, TRAFFIC LIGHTS - I have about 30 seconds to decide if I'm attracted to him. When I'm not I politely decline. I don't really think "maybe I could learn to like him" when all I have to go on is his looks. I will give you agreeing to marry a total stranger on television should probably be on no one's bucket list but I don't understand why she is the only one getting grief. He was only excited because he thought she was really pretty. I'm sure he is a nice guy but his enthuasim was 100% based on her looks. And if he is trying to win her over perhaps he should provide an explanation as to WHY he lives with his parents. I gotta be honest, if I met him in a bar and we struck up a conversation and he told me he lived with his parents and just giggled instead of an immediate explanation? Ummm let this guy off at the next stop

[ramble]

I gotta be honest, if I met him in a bar and we struck up a conversation and he told me he lived with his parents and just giggled instead of an immediate explanation? Ummm let this guy off at the next stop

I agree. The comment without any explanation other than a endorsement that is family is great. I'd hope so if you're intending on living with them. Caring for family I get. Being single & deciding to live with family I get. Having a bad break in life & needing to be with family I get. Going on a show to marry a stranger & saying yep I live at home & not saying much more than that. I don't get.

I almost feel sorry for Jamie. Not quite, but closer than I have since her skanky Bachelor Pad showing. Married by "experts" to a guy you're not attracted to who announces off the cuff he lives at home & then jokes about grandpa feeling up the ladies? Probably not the best way to start your faux wedded bliss.

[Ohwell]

If I had gotten married by that young valley girl, I wouldn't have been completely convinced that I was married at all.  Although maybe that's a good thing.

 

It would have been much better if Jason and Courtney had met somehow and just dated for awhile.  I think he's got too much going on with his dying mother, and I can see Courtney feeling guilty/frustrated that she's not the center of attention as a new bride.  That is an awful lot for a young couple to take on.  

 

Jamie/Doug:  I've got nothing more to add to what's already been said, except I wonder why he hadn't bothered to have the moles removed when he had a job and health insurance.  He seems like a nice guy though, and the family seems nice.  She mentioned that she wanted a family, but I wonder if she'll get more than she bargained for, and how much time she'll have to spend with them. 

 

Vaughn & Monet are the most intriguing for me right now.  I thought he was gay, but maybe he isn't and I certainly hope so for her sake.  However, the "take your shoes off so you don't mess up the carpet" thing kind of turned me off.  And Monet:  I don't think he wants to hear about taking panties out of your butt crack.  You do that yourself, ok?  

[aradia22]

The smell of trash is wafting through the air. Pungent, nauseating, but strangely compelling. Once you've caught the scent, you can't eradicate it from your nostrils. I thought it was going to be a boring summer and then Married At First Sight and Game of Crowns came into my life bringing back all the awful goodness of the vh1 reality shows of the past. 

 

Why would they make them say vows like that? That was super painful. They are making a mockery of marriage.

 

To be fair to Jamie, I think it's super important to be attracted to the person you're with. They don't have to be a supermodel or a movie star but you have to think they're attractive. And it's not like Doug wasn't equally shallow. He just ended up with the better bargain. Sociologist, you cannot talk your way out of this! Yes, you can become more attracted to someone. But you can't start by being repulsed by someone and then grow to find them attractive. I'm not always attracted to the most conventionally attractive guys. But I start out at least a little attracted to them. I did feel kind of bad for Jamie. She wasn't attracted to him and then he kept touching her and trying to force that intimacy. It wasn't super aggressive but if I'm not attracted to someone I'm very conscious about being permitted to maintain my personal space. His comments about spooning and that they would have to kiss were kind of skeevy.

 

I'm still curious how Jamie and Jason would have worked out.

 

This show has the feel of those old wedding shows. I think they were mainly WE tv shows but some might have been produced in Canada. You know, the vague cheapness of both the production and whatever was onscreen, the innocuous, pleasant voiceover.

 

You are a strong woman to defy your family to make a risky and possibly terrible decision... based on the trust of a reality show production team and a group of "experts" who seem increasingly shady in spite of their credentials. Yup. Woo, feminism. 

 

Some people get married quickly but I believe in a long courtship. That's when you learn about another person and develop the ties that will bind you closer or learn about the dealbreakers that might not be apparent at first. Here, you've got "experts" who are trying their best to make this work and justify their decisions who will ignore the dealbreakers. So now you're learning about all the reasons you might not be compatible without having the foundation of a relationship that would help you get through the rough patches.

 

 

If I had gotten married by that young valley girl, I wouldn't have been completely convinced that I was married at all.  Although maybe that's a good thing.

What kind of cockamamie vows was that woman reading when she married Courtney and Jason and Monet and Vaughn? It sounded like the random speech the DJ or a family member comes up with after surveying the people who showed up to the party. She struck me more as the wallflower in the teen comedy who blossoms into a swan or finds a guy who appreciates her just as she is. That or the secondary character in some kind of British or Amish period piece. Can someone who has been married tell me... isn't the ceremony just a formality? Wouldn't they have had to sign legal documents or a marriage license or something prior to this?

 

I do give Courtney credit for being encouraging and warmer than we've seen her be in the premiere. They really do strike me as a couple who would meet at a club and hit it off but plenty of those couples break up. I do think it was smart to open with Doug and Jamie to make us much more open to the other couples.

 

Freaking Cilona. They might just be feeling the reality of the situation after walking down the aisle? You know you're essentially saying that they didn't appreciate the reality of the situation when you made them enter into it. Gross.

 

Oh, they went out to take photos. I seriously thought the show was like, well, you're married. Now get out of the hotel. We only booked the room for half and hour. You're banished. No limo. No party. Walk home. The photo session was so weird. Go on... fake that you're in love. I think they should have made it into a bonding thing instead of making them take the stereotypical wedding photos. I'm an awkward photo taker so I find their ability to fake romantic photos suspicious. One last thing on the photos, couldn't they have found better locations? 

 

I think the "slow dance" is just the layman waltz since most people who aren't trained dancers don't know how to do a waltz anymore.

[aradia22]

I didn't pay enough attention to realize that Monet is actually 3 years older than Vaughn.

 

"I think the clinking of the glasses which encouraged the first kiss is kind of sweet. It's the community saying 'show us that you love each other.'" - Dr. Pepper Schwartz

What? Yes, coerced intimacy for the entertainment of a crowd is super romantic. It's so endearing how a mob can compel a couple to prove their love as though it matters how people outside the relationship judge it.

 

I think Jason's speech was super sweet. Vaughn's speech was polite but open to more. Doug's speech was generic and awkward.

 

Yes, the receptions seemed cheap. But Courtney and Jason's reception seemed so much more lively than Doug and Jamie's. I think the energy of the group had something to do with it.

 

I wonder when they're shooting the talking heads. Sometimes they seem a little sad (as though they're talking about something that happened earlier and they've already experienced fights or drama) or maybe they're just tired from all the filming.

[zxy556575]

I'm still curious how Jamie and Jason would have worked out.

 

He strikes me as too young and inexperienced for her, not chronologically but Jamie seems so much more worldly.

[Ohwell]

He strikes me as too young and inexperienced for her, not chronologically but Jamie seems so much more worldly.

I don't think Jason/Jamie would have worked out either.  I also think Jamie is lying about her age; she looks 35 to me. 

[MsPH]

I think Jamie might warm up to Doug eventually. The thing is that, this wasn't just any other meeting between two people. It was meeting someone you're expected to be romantically involved for the rest of your life, and I'm sure she'd already envisioned something in her head, a handsome stranger made for TV sweeping her off her feet. Then she was presented with something very different in a situation that was bound to be awkward at best. That could play a big part in her initial reaction to him. If she had met him in some other situation without any romantic undertones and gotten to know him a bit, then she might not have even thought about him being unattractive.

 

I also met my boyfriend online and we spent months talking everyday before actually meeting in person. I knew him really well and I'd seen him on webcam and in pics, and I was definitely attracted to him. Yet no one looks exactly the same in person, and once we did meet, my first thought was along the lines of "who is this strange man and why is he hugging me and holding my hand". It was just awkward. My mind kept telling me I know him, but my body refused to get the message. I can't even imagine what it's like when you know absolutely nothing about the person, who looks nothing like you imagined and you're then expected to let them invade your personal space, infront of an audience no less. Luckily I got over my initial confusion soon enough and did fall in love with my boyfriend. Jamie obviously has a much longer way to go, which is why I wish they'd let them get to know each other for longer than a month. That's a ridiculously short time to get to know someone enough to decide to stay married to them (how absurd is that sentence BTW?). I have a feeling they did it like that so they'd have a bigger chance at a "happy" ending. I mean at that point the couples are still getting to know each other and might not be ready to give up, even if it's not smooth sailing.

 

After seeing the preview at the end, I think Doug and Jamie might actually have the best shot at making it work. He seems like a nice warm person and even though Jamie is a famewhore, I think she can recognise it and appreciate it, especially considering how she's been treated in the past by the guys she's into. I can't help but root for them!

 

Cortney and Jason are clearly compatible in a dating sense and almost seemed like a real couple during their wedding. However, that doesn't mean they'll be mentally compatible in the long run. They are quite young still and have a lot going on in their lives. I'm not gonna judge Jason for taking part in the show despite his mother's condition, since she may have taken a turn for the worse only recently and I don't think he should have to put his life on hold just because his mom is dying. Of course it's not an easy situation for his new bride and the producers are probably loving it, sick as they are, but I think his mom would also like to see him find happiness while she's still alive. Whether this is the best way to go about it is of course debatable.

 

I thought there was something off about Vaughn in the first episode already and this episode and the previews didn't help. He just seems a bit stuck up and rigid and I feel sorry for Monet, since she seems so normal and down-to-earth. I think she panicked for a reason. I don't have much hopes for them, especially since she said in the previews that she doesn't like him as a person. That is a dealbreaker right there. There is nothing more important in a marriage than liking the person you're married to. This is why I think Doug still has a chance.

[CousinOliver]

Sure, attraction is important and difficult to explain (I have been attracted to both conventionally physically attractive people and people considered ugly), but Jamie, IMHO, was just mean about it.  C'mon, you are on TV -- not even for the first or second time.  There is no way that you can be horrified at the sight of someone and have it *not* be insulting.  To do that to the poor guy is really unforgivable; she almost a professional actress at this point.  For the producers, whoever, to pair that shallow woman with the nice guy to get us talking (success!) was also pretty unforgivable.  

[Ohwell]

I think Jamie could have done a much better job of hiding her "'revulsion" at seeing Doug.  She treated him like he should have entered the ugly dog contest, and it was uncalled for.  I can certainly understand her or anyone else in that situation feeling awkward about seeing someone for the first time, finding said person to be unattractive, getting married, and then being expected to stay together for a month (it is a month, right?).  But she signed up for this with her eyes wide open, and she could have conducted herself with more class, no matter how she was feeling inside. 

[Secret]

I only stopped to add this to the DVR because I recognized Jamie from The Bachelor and Bachelor Pad. Of course, I also feel like I know Jamie because of the time spent on camera in those shows. If you watched either of those shows, Jamie was pretty naiive. She has come across to me, in each show, as having very magical or fairy tale thinking. She made a fool of herself with Ben and got the boot. Then on BP, as I recall, she was totally played and STILL had magic fairy tale dreams of happy ever after until a reality check repeatedly. She is book smart (she's an RN/BSN), but not all that emotionally wise or self-aware, IMO.

I think she was picturing that her "dream guy" had to be gorgeous and perfect in every way. She was picturing her Prince Charming standing, waiting for her. When she didn't have instant butterflies, she panicked. She freaked out. She had no clue what to do. She did not handle it well, but I don't think she's as shallow as people are judging her. I have judged her plenty over the years and she gets a minor pass on her crappy attitude.

I think it is perfect that they put her with Doug. He is exactly what she's said FOR YEARS (on TV) that she's wanted. He will worship the ground she walks on, he will love her, be her partner. He's just not instantly attractive.

You know what? That part can grow. Dr Pepper seemed skeptical, but it can happen. I met my husband on Match way back when. We conversed via lengthy emails for about a week. I "knew" him before meeting him, but the moment I saw him, it wasn't instant sparks. That came after spending time together. I felt mostly relief that he wasn't repulsive! The sparks and connection took time to build, but we've been married ten years now.

I have faith they can get there - or, this will crash and burn in spectacular fashion. Either way, I'll be watching!

Edited July 17, 2014 by Secret

[Ohwell]

I don't remember seeing Jamie before because I never watched BP and I haven't seen all seasons of The Bachelor.   By the way, I think Doug is nice-looking, especially when he smiles.  Plus, I don't care if a guy is balding as long as he has a neat haircut.  For me, it's just the moles that are an issue because it's hard to overlook them.

[aradia22]

 

I don't remember seeing Jamie before because I never watched BP and I haven't seen all seasons of The Bachelor.   By the way, I think Doug is nice-looking, especially when he smiles.  Plus, I don't care if a guy is balding as long as he has a neat haircut.  For me, it's just the moles that are an issue because it's hard to overlook them.

Does he get them removed? I watched it late at night but I feel like in the previews the moles had disappeared.

[heebiejeebie]

I find it rather odd and contradictory that in the first episode the experts were all rah rah rah about arranged marriages the world over and how successful they are. Yet now as the weddings take place, they insert themselves as completely and utterly necessary for the process to "work".  Really?  Because I'm guessing not a single one of those 94 percent arranged marriages that are deemed a success had any of these experts let alone anything approaching their system.

 

What I would like to see is an approach that tries to copy the mechanisms of arranged marriages with our cultural sensibilities. An experiment that brings in a neutral party and couples with family and friends to find someone a spouse.  Then watch the period in which the couples date and get to know each other. 

 

I feel like this went from a look at arranged marriages to simply letting the creepy Eharmony guy marry you to someone and go all Bachelor camera whoring on their asses.  If it wasn't for Jason I could go all trainwreck glorious goodness on this.

[Spiderella2]

Does he get them removed? I watched it late at night but I feel like in the previews the moles had disappeared.

He grew a beard, so it wasn't as noticeable. Honestly, if he had removed those moles ages ago, she would have considered him more attractive,

[bubba2]

Jason and Courtney seem like they are really attracted to each other. I wonder if h did go through with the wedding with his mom sick because he had already committed and didn't want to leave the girl at the altar. She could have gotten worse. He lucked out as far as looks are concerned. She seemed pretty happy with his looks, too. And if they are both nice people, emotionally stable, and fairly easy to get along with, they should be able to stay together.

I thought it would be cool if Courtney would tell Jason that his mom was her mom, too, now and if she needed help, she could stay with her and take care of her.

I also wonder if he knew his mom wanted him to get married before she died or something like that. Or maybe be needed money because of his mom's expenses, wanted to get married, and decided to risk the matchmaker thing.

I believe in marriage too much. Arranged marriages seem a little odd to me because I wasn't raised in that kind of culture, but the countries that have it usually have parents heavily involved. They know you better and they are more emotionally invested in you if you go through marriage problems, most of the time. In the movies, the evil dad matches children up for political advantage and things like that. I suspect most parents who match their kids up want what is good for the children, too.

Arranged marriages usually works better in a culture where children aren't raised with ideas about the need for butterflies, fairy tale happily every after, romantic love as an ideal for the marriage. Some cultures are more practical about marriage, and if kids are raised in that culture with the idea that they grow to love their spouse, it works better. Jamie said she was looking for butterflies right off.

What I don't like is it seems like the matchmakers are having two strangers marry with the option of getting a divorce after 30 days. It's foolish to go into marriage with the idea that divorce is an option. I think two of the couples claim to be Christians so they shouldn't have divorce as an out if things don't work out.

The wedding vows were stupid. You don't promise to walk beside someone forever. It ends at death. You shouldn't promise to support your spouse in everything. Sometimes, to be a good partner, you have to tell your partner that something isn't a good idea to save them grief.

I also don't consider it very ethical to get married and not have sex with your spouse on your wedding day.

They could have backed out. Even if they could have been sued by the producers, this is a much bigger promise. It was hard for me to respect Jamie as a decision maker. If she didn't like the guy at first sight, she should have backed out. Saying yes and divorcing him later is a lot more cruel than leaving him at the altar. And she could have warmed up to him. Those stupid comments about not wanting to kiss him are annoying.

Doug is likeable. I think he's being a bit too much of a 'nice guy' with Jamie. He should treat himself a little like a prize, and act like he's evaluating her to see if she's worthy, in a playful way, to reel her in a bit if he's interested. When she suggested he sleep on the couch on her wedding night, he could have said, "We can have sex on the couch if you want. I'm down for that."

[aradia22]

 

Arranged marriages usually works better in a culture where children aren't raised with ideas about the need for butterflies, fairy tale happily every after, romantic love as an ideal for the marriage. Some cultures are more practical about marriage, and if kids are raised in that culture with the idea that they grow to love their spouse, it works better.

Yeah, but even if it's not directly related to marriage, I can't think of a culture that doesn't have a story that values romantic love. Maybe the Puritans or the Amish and that's only because I don't know anything about their cultural traditions.

[ElleBee]

I also don't consider it very ethical to get married and not have sex with your spouse on your wedding day.

 

I'm pretty sure it's ethical not to have sex on any given day, wedding day included. IMO it's more "unethical" to force yourself to have sex with a stranger just because you signed on for a hokey reality show.

[ketose]

St. Valentine was known for marrying Roman soldiers who were forbidden by Claudius to distract themselves with love. I think there was a higher proportion of arranged marriages among the higher classes where status mattered. Poor people had more freedom because there wasn't much marrying up.

 

I found this show pretty interesting because one of the reasons people get together is proximity. People meet in school or at work, both of which have limited populations to choose from. For the most part, Monet and Vaughn and Cortney and Jason have some personality matches plus they find each other physically attractive. I think Jamie didn't like Doug's look to start off, but she's already tried to deal with attractive guys on The Bachelor and that didn't work out for her. I think she has issues that only an ugly guy has the patience to handle.

[MsPH]

I also don't consider it very ethical to get married and not have sex with your spouse on your wedding day.

 

Why is that, if I may ask? As far as sex goes, I think it's always unethical if one or more of the people involved don't want to be having it. Regardless of timing or marital status.

 

And if Doug had made skeevy comments about couch sex, I'm pretty sure Jamie would've fled the room and divorced him right there and then. I know I would have, if I was stuck with a strange man feeling that uncomfortable.

[trimthatfat]

Sure, attraction is important and difficult to explain (I have been attracted to both conventionally physically attractive people and people considered ugly), but Jamie, IMHO, was just mean about it.  C'mon, you are on TV -- not even for the first or second time.  There is no way that you can be horrified at the sight of someone and have it *not* be insulting.  To do that to the poor guy is really unforgivable; she almost a professional actress at this point.  For the producers, whoever, to pair that shallow woman with the nice guy to get us talking (success!) was also pretty unforgivable.  

I agree. Plus, no one asked her to do this show - she, I assume, auditioned for it and should have been game regardless of Doug's looks. She has to know that it was possible she would be matched with someone who wouldn't meet her standards.

[trimthatfat]

Why is that, if I may ask? As far as sex goes, I think it's always unethical if one or more of the people involved don't want to be having it. Regardless of timing or marital status.

Seconded. No one has to have sex on their wedding night, nor should anyone feel forced into consummating their marriage before they are ready.

Edited July 25, 2014 by trimthatfat

[answerphone]

It's interesting to watch this season now, in 2019 on Amazon Prime, as we all know what going to happen to them for the next few years