Candiace Dillard Bassett: Ducking Purses Since 2018

[eXiled]

2 minutes ago, RealReality said:

I strongly disagree.  People have caught a criminal case for what they felt was "self defense" and the reason monique needed a statement was because it wasn't clear cut from the video alone.  

So rolling eyes and being tickled doesn't change that fact.  

Further, beyond a criminal case a person can ALSO catch a civil case, which has a lower burden of proof and opens the door to losing money AND having to hire an attorney to defend you.  Whereas a private attorney for a person suing can decide to take it on a contingency. 

So, am I going to take that risk?  No.  Where I can walk away I'm going to walk away.  

Every "corny example" involves the same set of facts.  Someone entering the personal space of another in an unwanted manner, be it explicit or understood.  And the outrage has never been this high when Robyn, Mia or Michael have done it (with gizelle). 

I'm not on a high horse as I'm perfectly fine to watch Molly whopping on BGC.  But this isn't BGC.  

 

LOL, I'm fairly certain I understand how the law works.  

Your honor, I present my case to you in the form of my previous post.

Do I have a chance of getting away with it?

[RealReality]

11 minutes ago, eXiled said:

When it comes to aggressive touching/hitting, I've always believed I'd go with a compromise if I were attacked:

Beat that bitch's ass. Call the police to explain why. Hopefully there would be cameras nearby or someone trying to film a Worldstar video that would help exonerate me later.

I'd then do the reverse of what Monique did.

Instead of puffing out my chest and being loudly unapologetic, I would weep violently, allowing myself to be overtaken by full-body convulsions. I would explain my panic at being assaulted. I would be hysterical over the fact that I blacked out and hurt someone. I would be flummoxed that all I recall from the altercation after I was touched is waking up with my unconscious aggressor lying beneath me.

I would enlist a good attorney if criminal charges were filed against me. My attorney would dig up my assailant's past to show that this was not her first offense. If she does not have a criminal record, I'm positive we could find evidence from her neighborhood and previous employment to document her short fuse.

I, on the other hand, am a professional person who would never attack someone physically just because she'd verbally hurt my feelings.

I would enlist a good attorney to file civil charges against my assailant. My trauma, stress, and depression would  be an issue. My medical and psychological records would prove my distress. Despite getting her ass beat, my assailant would have to pay for my pain.

I'd make it my business to take whatever my assailant owned, down to her shack. Had Candiace forced the issue with Mo, she might have netted something-something. Most hood chicks don't have much to begin with, hence the constant pop-offs.

LOL.  Diminished capacity or inability to form the requisite intent sound creative. 

But girl, imma need to see that worldstar video first!    

[Yours Truly]

39 minutes ago, eXiled said:

When it comes to aggressive touching/hitting, I've always believed I'd go with a compromise if I were attacked:

Beat that bitch's ass. Call the police to explain why. Hopefully there would be cameras nearby or someone trying to film a Worldstar video that would help exonerate me later.

I'd then do the reverse of what Monique did.

Instead of puffing out my chest and being loudly unapologetic, I would weep violently, allowing myself to be overtaken by full-body convulsions. I would explain my panic at being assaulted. I would be hysterical over the fact that I blacked out and hurt someone. I would be flummoxed that all I recall from the altercation after I was touched is waking up with my unconscious aggressor lying beneath me.

I would enlist a good attorney if criminal charges were filed against me. My attorney would dig up my assailant's past to show that this was not her first offense. If she does not have a criminal record, I'm positive we could find evidence from her neighborhood and previous employment to document her short fuse.

I, on the other hand, am a professional person who would never attack someone physically just because she'd verbally hurt my feelings.

I would enlist a good attorney to file civil charges against my assailant. My trauma, stress, and depression would  be an issue. My medical and psychological records would prove my distress. Despite getting her ass beat, my assailant would have to pay for my pain.

I'd make it my business to take whatever my assailant owned, down to her shack. Had Candiace forced the issue with Mo, she might have netted something-something. Most hood chicks don't have much to begin with, hence the constant pop-offs.

Lol! I mean it is what it is right? 
At the end of the day that’s what it boils down to to me. 

[Yours Truly]

39 minutes ago, RealReality said:

I strongly disagree.  People have caught a criminal case for what they felt was "self defense" and the reason monique needed a statement was because it wasn't clear cut from the video alone.  

So rolling eyes and being tickled doesn't change that fact.  

Further, beyond a criminal case a person can ALSO catch a civil case, which has a lower burden of proof and opens the door to losing money AND having to hire an attorney to defend you.  Whereas a private attorney for a person suing can decide to take it on a contingency. 

So, am I going to take that risk?  No.  Where I can walk away I'm going to walk away.  

Every "corny example" involves the same set of facts.  Someone entering the personal space of another in an unwanted manner, be it explicit or understood.  And the outrage has never been this high when Robyn, Mia or Michael have done it (with gizelle). 

I'm not on a high horse as I'm perfectly fine to watch Molly whopping on BGC.  But this isn't BGC.  

 

LOL, I'm fairly certain I understand how the law works. 

Not sure where the winery was but here is some information on the Maryland statute. 

Notably, the person claiming self defense must not have used more force than was necessary and must have been in immediate danger.  

Alone, a hair flick doesn't support the severity of the response  and calls into question of immediate danger.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Right_of_self-defense_in_Maryland

Go ahead and walk away. 🤷🏻‍♀️ It’s anyone’s prerogative to do just that. 

There’s also nothing wrong with standing your ground and defending yourself either. Doesn’t make someone a bad person cause the most immediate instinct they had was self defense. 

“Fight or flight”

Some people fight and some people flee. It’s a natural instinct in both cases.  That’s all I’m tryna say. 
 

[drivethroo]

Quote

Further, beyond a criminal case a person can ALSO catch a civil case, which has a lower burden of proof and opens the door to losing money AND having to hire an attorney to defend you. 

This is the reason Monique cited when she decided not to be about that life when Robyn ran up on her.

An Academy Award winning performance is also what Karen told Candiace she would do if Monique had beaten her.

[WhatAmIWatching]

1 hour ago, RealReality said:

I strongly disagree.  People have caught a criminal case for what they felt was "self defense" and the reason monique needed a statement was because it wasn't clear cut from the video alone.  

So rolling eyes and being tickled doesn't change that fact.  

Further, beyond a criminal case a person can ALSO catch a civil case, which has a lower burden of proof and opens the door to losing money AND having to hire an attorney to defend you.  Whereas a private attorney for a person suing can decide to take it on a contingency. 

So, am I going to take that risk?  No.  Where I can walk away I'm going to walk away.  

Every "corny example" involves the same set of facts.  Someone entering the personal space of another in an unwanted manner, be it explicit or understood.  And the outrage has never been this high when Robyn, Mia or Michael have done it (with gizelle). 

I'm not on a high horse as I'm perfectly fine to watch Molly whopping on BGC.  But this isn't BGC.  

 

LOL, I'm fairly certain I understand how the law works. 

Not sure where the winery was but here is some information on the Maryland statute. 

Notably, the person claiming self defense must not have used more force than was necessary and must have been in immediate danger.  

Alone, a hair flick doesn't support the severity of the response  and calls into question of immediate danger.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Right_of_self-defense_in_Maryland

I watched my BFF go through this with her ex. He went after her, she defended herself, and they BOTH got booked and BOTH got a court case. She also ended up with 30 days of an ankle bracelet and a fine, all for trying to get that man off of and away from her. 

Justice doesn't always play fair, and now she's got a misdemeanor on her record. (Her ex has a different degree of misdemeanor, though was charged with a felony and had a history pre-my friend of DV) Self defense is harder than you'd think to get past a judge, no matter how much money or documentation you throw at it.

 

Edited November 15, 2021 by WhatAmIWatching
of not on

[spunky]

Candiace did a great job on the Kelly Clarkson show today. She sang with a live band and killed her dance moves. She's not at the point where she can sing and dance at the same time,  but I'm sure with enough practice she'll build enough stamina. I wonder what Andy has to say about auto tune now.

ETA: Kelly interviewed Candiace before her performance.  She gets her love of music from her dad. He used to play music for her while her mom was pregnant with her. And he was always playing music.  He supported her releasing her first single and is very proud of her. 

Edited November 15, 2021 by spunky

[RealReality]

7 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

Go ahead and walk away. 🤷🏻‍♀️ It’s anyone’s prerogative to do just that. 

There’s also nothing wrong with standing your ground and defending yourself either. Doesn’t make someone a bad person cause the most immediate instinct they had was self defense. 

“Fight or flight”

Some people fight and some people flee. It’s a natural instinct in both cases.  That’s all I’m tryna say. 
 

To me, if you cannot use words to defend yourself against words there is something wrong with that.  

If "standing your ground" means responding to mean words with violence, for me that generally makes you a not good person.

Because an adult should have the restraint to either use their words or walk away in the vast majority of situations. 

If you feel that you're in immediate danger okay sure.  But outside of candace being attacked by monique and that time Robyn had an umbrella to moniques neck (which she apparently didn't feel very threatened by since she managed to keep her hands to herself) I haven't seen anyone in some immediate danger that they couldn't walk away. 

As an adult, you should have enough restraint to overcome your natural instincts.  The inability to exercise restraint is something I'd expect from a child.    

[Yours Truly]

15 minutes ago, RealReality said:

To me, if you cannot use words to defend yourself against words there is something wrong with that.  

If "standing your ground" means responding to mean words with violence, for me that generally makes you a not good person.

Because an adult should have the restraint to either use their words or walk away in the vast majority of situations. 

If you feel that you're in immediate danger okay sure.  But outside of candace being attacked by monique and that time Robyn had an umbrella to moniques neck (which she apparently didn't feel very threatened by since she managed to keep her hands to herself) I haven't seen anyone in some immediate danger that they couldn't walk away. 

As an adult, you should have enough restraint to overcome your natural instincts.  The inability to exercise restraint is something I'd expect from a child.    

So people should be allowed to be threatening and intimating and use aggressive body language just as long as they don’t actually touch you?

See I finding condoning such behavior concerning. Everything up until the actual act of violence is A OK? Hmmmmm.. 🤔 Too me that isn’t the sign of good people either but I mean… To each there own.  🤷🏻‍♀️

Edited November 15, 2021 by Yours Truly

[RealReality]

2 minutes ago, Yours Truly said:

So people should be allowed to be threatening and intimating and use aggressive body language just as long as they don’t actually touch you?

See I finding condoning such behavior concerning. Everything up until the actual act of violence is A OK? Hmmmmm.. 🤔 Too me that isn’t the sign of good people either but I mean… To each there own.  🤷🏻‍♀️

Should be?  No.  Because violence shouldn't be a punishment.  If the idea is that someone is "getting away" with something unless you are physically aggressive then it's not a defense as much as it is a punishment.  

There are plenty of shitty things people do that don't warrant a violent response.  And some of them absolutely "deserve" it.  

See, again, saying that not becoming violent is "condoning" the behavior is saying that its up to each person to decide to mete out physical punishment if and when they feel like it.  

And I think history, even recent history shows us what a bad idea that can be.  

Choosing not to react violently is not condoning any such behavior and its odd to me that people think that.  

As a grown adult, you can simply leave and not have anything more to do with the person.

I'm not sure how that is "condoning" anything other than your own personal, emotional and mental well being without the stress of potential legal and financial consequences.   

Going out there in the world to "punish" others is a fools errand, IMO.  

[WhatAmIWatching]

8 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

There’s also nothing wrong with standing your ground and defending yourself either. Doesn’t make someone a bad person cause the most immediate instinct they had was self defense. 

This is exactly what Candiace is doing, standing her ground and fighting  (with her words) to defend herself when the others come for her. She, again, does not start the mess, she just responds to what they serve. She is always defending herself against them taking shots at her. They cry foul when she doesn't just take it, and fights back. They bring the knife, she fires back with a bazooka, which is what they don't like. What's that saying...Don't start none, won't be none?
 

22 minutes ago, Yours Truly said:

So people should be allowed to be threatening and intimating and use aggressive body language just as long as they don’t actually touch you?

Candiace squaring up or posturing at her size and stature, against all the rest of the cast, and saying they feel threatened makes me laugh. That's like a vw bug up against a tour bus! I have serious doubts that any of those women feel physically threatened by her, and haven't heard them express that they are worried about anything but her mouth.

Edited November 15, 2021 by WhatAmIWatching
Forgot part of my sentence

[RealReality]

7 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

I watched my BFF go through this with her ex. He went after her, she defended herself, and they BOTH got booked and BOTH got a court case. She also ended up with 30 days of an ankle bracelet and a fine, all for trying to get that man off of and away from her. 

Justice doesn't always play fair, and now she's got a misdemeanor on her record. (Her ex has a different degree of misdemeanor, though was charged with a felony and had a history pre-my friend of DV) Self defense is harder than you'd think to get past a judge, no matter how much money or documentation you throw at it.

 

There is this case we read about in crim law that ALWAYS stuck in my mind and I believe it was the basis for many states to adopt a "battered woman's defense"

So this woman is with a guy who beats her terribly and on a regular basis.  

Everytime she tried to run away he would find her an drag her back to his place and beat her senseless some more.  She had no money so she could never get very far.  

One day, she and her prince charming get into a fight and he beats her again.  And he tells her "listen, I'm going to take a nap, but when I wake up, I'm going to kill you"

No fucks given because why should he. 

So this terrified and battered woman shoots and kills him....as he sleeps.  

Even though she has every reason to fear for her life, even though she couldn't get far enough to escape him the judged found that she couldn't use a self defense argument because she was in IMMINENT danger.  Even though she couldn't escape him and when he was beating her she couldn't defend herself.  

It was a sad case but like you said what may seem just can often get lost.  

[Yours Truly]

I think behaving in a physically threatening manner and exhibiting intimidating body language is just as distasteful as physical violence. Am I wrong?

Why does it HAVE TO BE one or the other? 🤦🏻‍♀️
 
 

Edited November 16, 2021 by Yours Truly

[WhatAmIWatching]

2 hours ago, RealReality said:

There is this case we read about in crim law that ALWAYS stuck in my mind and I believe it was the basis for many states to adopt a "battered woman's defense"

So this woman is with a guy who beats her terribly and on a regular basis.  

Everytime she tried to run away he would find her an drag her back to his place and beat her senseless some more.  She had no money so she could never get very far.  

One day, she and her prince charming get into a fight and he beats her again.  And he tells her "listen, I'm going to take a nap, but when I wake up, I'm going to kill you"

No fucks given because why should he. 

So this terrified and battered woman shoots and kills him....as he sleeps.  

Even though she has every reason to fear for her life, even though she couldn't get far enough to escape him the judged found that she couldn't use a self defense argument because she was in IMMINENT danger.  Even though she couldn't escape him and when he was beating her she couldn't defend herself.  

It was a sad case but like you said what may seem just can often get lost.  

That is heartbreaking just to read. I can see why it stuck with you. I've experienced abuse in a relationship myself (thankfully it never got legal) which is why I'm so against casual or throw away violence. It should be the last resort when one is in actual danger, not just because one got mad at words spewed, or over some banty rooster prancing. It's never worth it. Monique got off very lucky, and I don't think she realizes it.

 

2 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

I think behaving in a physically threatening manner and exhibiting intimidating body language is just as distasteful as physical violence. Am I wrong?

Why does it HAVE TO BE one or the other? 🤦🏻‍♀️
 
 

IME: one is legal, the other usually isn't. Nasty words and posturing can't break a jaw, so for me, physical violence is the worse one. 

The premise of these shows has (unfortunately) evolved to the constant personality clashes, and escalating verbal takedowns, so the cast has to be able to keep their hands off each other.

  I wish the HW's shows would go back to rich people spending recklessly, and traveling to beautiful places, with only a few petty squabbles sprinkled on top.

 

[Yours Truly]

59 minutes ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

That is heartbreaking just to read. I can see why it stuck with you. I've experienced abuse in a relationship myself (thankfully it never got legal) which is why I'm so against casual or throw away violence. It should be the last resort when one is in actual danger, not just because one got mad at words spewed, or over some banty rooster prancing. It's never worth it. Monique got off very lucky, and I don't think she realizes it.

 

IME: one is legal, the other usually isn't. Nasty words and posturing can't break a jaw, so for me, physical violence is the worse one. 

The premise of these shows has (unfortunately) evolved to the constant personality clashes, and escalating verbal takedowns, so the cast has to be able to keep their hands off each other.

  I wish the HW's shows would go back to rich people spending recklessly, and traveling to beautiful places, with only a few petty squabbles sprinkled on top.

 

I just asked if I was wrong in thinking that behaving in a physical threatening way is just as distasteful as physical violence.  I think reverting back to legalize to negate how abhorrent being physically intimidating during disagreements is just rings a bit hypocritical to me. 
 

It’s wrong to do both but there’s this overwhelming amount of deflection and dismissiveness when it comes to equally ugly behavior. I’m talking on a personal level and not on a legal level. That’s all. It just sounds like there’s this very nonchalant attitude about people being aggressive all the while condemning violence so I find it quite odd. 

[WhatAmIWatching]

1 hour ago, Yours Truly said:

I just asked if I was wrong in thinking that behaving in a physical threatening way is just as distasteful as physical violence.  I think reverting back to legalize to negate how abhorrent being physically intimidating during disagreements is just rings a bit hypocritical to me. 
 

It’s wrong to do both but there’s this overwhelming amount of deflection and dismissiveness when it comes to equally ugly behavior. I’m talking on a personal level and not on a legal level. That’s all. It just sounds like there’s this very nonchalant attitude about people being aggressive all the while condemning violence so I find it quite odd. 

   IMO, the nasty, and below-the-belt, verbal barbs they throw I'd equate rather equally with any physically aggressive postures. I don't care for, condone, or agree with either, it IS ugly behavior. I feel that while those are on the same level of ugly, they are somewhat lesser than physical violence, in my view. 

 For me, anything that gets physical goes into a very different category. Words can hurt an ego or feelings, but can't cause physical damage. Posturing can spark fear or anger, but it too can't cause damage physically. To me, that's a gulf of difference.

  What I don't get is that none of them have to stand there and take either the flung words or any physical intimidation, do they? They're choosing to, which is what I find weird. Why give someone that much power? Pfft let them yell to an empty room or posture in front of a mirror.
 -Does production even let them walk away if they want, or do they push them to keep fussing? How much do they meddle?

  

[Yours Truly]

I personally can’t be all that nuanced when it comes to the aggression. I’ll condemned you the minute you’ve decided to introduce an intimidating element regardless if contact has been made. That is just as damaging. I think it ignores very important boundaries. It goes beyond the basic catty barbs and snide remarks.  You don’t know what someone has gone through and can’t simply count on measured reactions to such an extreme infliction so to casually introduce behavior that crosses into violent just for the sake of flexing is dangerous AND fucked up. You have no idea what sort of traumas you’re tapping into. Yes, people should monitor and be cautious about how willingly they throw around threats and violent elements. Just as much as they should walk away from a possible physical altercation. 

It’s distasteful all the way around so I give no passes to anyone who decides to get into that arena. Once you decide on that approach then you’ve willingly entered into a specific situation and should take responsibility for your own actions as well. The problem doesn’t just start with the physical. It has to do with all parties involved deciding to inflict some sort of distress and pain to that level. Intimidation and aggression are just as jarring and damaging and shouldn’t be easily dismissed. That I can’t get behind. But that’s just me.


 

 

Edited November 16, 2021 by Yours Truly

[Rlb8031]

1 hour ago, Yours Truly said:

I personally can’t be all that nuanced when it comes to the aggression. I’ll condemned you the minute you’ve decided to introduce an intimidating element regardless if contact has been made. That is just as damaging. I think it ignores very important boundaries. It goes beyond the basic catty barbs and snide remarks.  You don’t know what someone has gone through and can’t simply count on measured reactions to such an extreme infliction so to casually introduce behavior that crosses into violent just for the sake of flexing is dangerous. Yes, people should monitor and be cautious about how willingly they throw around threats and violent elements. Just as much as they should walk away from a possible physical altercation. 

It’s distasteful all the way around so I give no passes to anyone who decides to get into that arena. Once you decide on that approach then you’ve willingly entered into a specific situation and should take responsibility for your own actions as well. The problem doesn’t just start with the physical. It has to do with all parties involved deciding to inflict some sort of distress and pain on that level. Intimidation and aggression are just as jarring and damaging and shouldn’t be easily dismissed. That I can’t get behind. But that’s just me.

Well said. I'd add one more thing that I think is an interesting nuance to this. One of the ways to combat physical aggression is to engage in psychological aggression. Last year there was a lot of talk about Monique and her "army" of bloggers or people who would post on her behalf on blogs and message boards. She was roundly condemned for this behavior, even though all of the justifications I'm seeing here would indicate that such a non-violent war of words is the more socially acceptable route. But somehow bringing an "army" to a verbal fight is beyond the pale. I still don't understand all the rules to fighting in the twenties, it seems very complex. 

At the same time, Candiace (and many other HWs) seem to get a pass for the horrible things they post on-line. The IRL behavior often drives many of the HWs conflicts on camera, but don't get nearly the pearl clutching that happens anytime someone's words become words of violence a la "someone is gonna beat your ass if you keep on like this" or when someone may have proxies posting on their behalf. (As an aside, I often wonder why no one raises the question as to whether some of the Candiace stans are also friends and acquaintances)

[RealReality]

11 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

I just asked if I was wrong in thinking that behaving in a physical threatening way is just as distasteful as physical violence.  I think reverting back to legalize to negate how abhorrent being physically intimidating during disagreements is just rings a bit hypocritical to me. 
 

It’s wrong to do both but there’s this overwhelming amount of deflection and dismissiveness when it comes to equally ugly behavior. I’m talking on a personal level and not on a legal level. That’s all. It just sounds like there’s this very nonchalant attitude about people being aggressive all the while condemning violence so I find it quite odd. 

 I don't think it's deflection to talk about legal standards because those are generally a reflection of societal beliefs and ideals.  

If society doesn't have a bright line between words and violence then you cannot really protect speech and even abborent actions that aren't savory but also aren't per se dangerous. 

And that's why self defense generally requires an imminent threat of physical harm as judged by a reasonable person. 

Because society likely doesn't want to encourage a society where only the physically strongest or the person with the best weapon to be allowed to speak or act.  

And if you're gonna physically attack someone to punish someone or teach them a lesson about propriety, what's to stop anyone from doing the same to you?  

It's not really my job to physically punish another adult.  Because I'm sure whomever is doing the "physically intimidating" act ALSO feels like they are punishing/teaching a lesson/have a good reason. 

You don't know if someone is going to be triggered by you looking them in the eye, bumping them in line at the store or inadvertently stepping on their shoe.  

If the argument is "you don't know what I've gone through that might trigger me" then by that same token you don't know what someone else has gone through and may physically trigger them.  Does this mean it's the same to step on someone's shoe as it is to hit them?

 

Edited November 16, 2021 by RealReality

[RealReality]

20 minutes ago, Rlb8031 said:

Well said. I'd add one more thing that I think is an interesting nuance to this. One of the ways to combat physical aggression is to engage in psychological aggression. Last year there was a lot of talk about Monique and her "army" of bloggers or people who would post on her behalf on blogs and message boards. She was roundly condemned for this behavior, even though all of the justifications I'm seeing here would indicate that such a non-violent war of words is the more socially acceptable route. But somehow bringing an "army" to a verbal fight is beyond the pale. I still don't understand all the rules to fighting in the twenties, it seems very complex. 

At the same time, Candiace (and many other HWs) seem to get a pass for the horrible things they post on-line. The IRL behavior often drives many of the HWs conflicts on camera, but don't get nearly the pearl clutching that happens anytime someone's words become words of violence a la "someone is gonna beat your ass if you keep on like this" or when someone may have proxies posting on their behalf. (As an aside, I often wonder why no one raises the question as to whether some of the Candiace stans are also friends and acquaintances)

I think trying to lob out "well if you like her you must be a friend or acquaintance" is kinda weak reasoning to me.  

I strongly disagree with people but I assume it's just two people disagreeing. Not that they have to have some ulterior motivation beyond simple ideological differences. 

Physical aggression is both physical AND psychological. 

Particularly in moniques case where she didn't feel any real threat from a collar flick so was only, AT BEST, using violence to try to shut someone up who said something she didn't like.  And was trying to make sure that her victim couldn't escape.  That's not just physically aggressive there is a high psychological component to that that the other person cannot walk away from. 

Monique later admitted that what candace did and said wasn't the real reason she hit her.  

But then MONIQUE continued the "psychological warfare" by making that pathetic song and music video and running to social media first to say that candace deserved the beating (and then later saying that candace didn't at all deserve it).

Verbal disagreements are what this show is about. 

Moniques problem was that she followed up physical assault with psychological aggression. 

It's not impossible to come back from a physical attack even on this franchise, look at Porsha Williams.   

But when she dragged Kenya, she was off the show for a while and certainly wasn't out there making music videos and talking a load of shit.  And then trying to say she blacked out, or was bullied as a child, or was from a poor neighborhood or whatever moniques excuse of the day was.  

 

 

Edited November 16, 2021 by RealReality

[RealReality]

2 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

I personally can’t be all that nuanced when it comes to the aggression. I’ll condemned you the minute you’ve decided to introduce an intimidating element regardless if contact has been made. That is just as damaging. I think it ignores very important boundaries. It goes beyond the basic catty barbs and snide remarks.  You don’t know what someone has gone through and can’t simply count on measured reactions to such an extreme infliction so to casually introduce behavior that crosses into violent just for the sake of flexing is dangerous and fucked up if I might add. Yes, people should monitor and be cautious about how willingly they throw around threats and violent elements. Just as much as they should walk away from a possible physical altercation. 

It’s distasteful all the way around so I give no passes to anyone who decides to get into that arena. Once you decide on that approach then you’ve willingly entered into a specific situation and should take responsibility for your own actions as well. The problem doesn’t just start with the physical. It has to do with all parties involved deciding to inflict some sort of distress and pain on that level. Intimidation and aggression are just as jarring and damaging and shouldn’t be easily dismissed. That I can’t get behind. But that’s just me.


 

 

But what you've termed     "aggressive" personal boundary violation, as you said, can differ with each person.  

It seems just as intimidating to try to threaten someone's job if they aren't nice to you.  

Can you define what a "violent element" or "extreme infliction" is that isn't open to wild subjective interpretation? 

You don't know what a person has been through so if someone is offended by being bumped in line or having their shoe stepped on does this allow for them to administer a beating if you don't apologize or you blow them off?

You say you can't be nuanced but it seems like the entire point rests on things that are subjective, without much of a bright line rule which seems pretty nuanced to me.  

Whereas a bight line rule that physical violence is not acceptable when you can walk away IS a bright line rule. 

Violence is defined as "behavior involving physical force intended to hurt, damage, or kill someone or something"

So by its definition it appears that violence is only physical force and therefore likely would not include the things you've mentioned. 

Edited November 16, 2021 by RealReality

[WhatAmIWatching]

23 minutes ago, Rlb8031 said:

Well said. I'd add one more thing that I think is an interesting nuance to this. One of the ways to combat physical aggression is to engage in psychological aggression. Last year there was a lot of talk about Monique and her "army" of bloggers or people who would post on her behalf on blogs and message boards. She was roundly condemned for this behavior, even though all of the justifications I'm seeing here would indicate that such a non-violent war of words is the more socially acceptable route. But somehow bringing an "army" to a verbal fight is beyond the pale. I still don't understand all the rules to fighting in the twenties, it seems very complex. 

At the same time, Candiace (and many other HWs) seem to get a pass for the horrible things they post on-line. The IRL behavior often drives many of the HWs conflicts on camera, but don't get nearly the pearl clutching that happens anytime someone's words become words of violence a la "someone is gonna beat your ass if you keep on like this" or when someone may have proxies posting on their behalf. (As an aside, I often wonder why no one raises the question as to whether some of the Candiace stans are also friends and acquaintances)

  Lol nope I don't know any of the cast, and as I've said, I don't particularly care for Candiace-or the 'Candiace character' on the show- it's just weird to me how she gets so much heat for doing the same things the rest of them do.    
  Except she doesn't start any of it, she just responds to it (and is loud as hell and doesn't stop) yet she's the worst person in the world and should get a beating. I'm trying to understand that logic, and why she's held to a different standard. Shouldn't they all get beatings then for the rancid things they spew? (Ol Karen should have got a lil something then for saying Giz has an incurable std and was in a mental hospital. That was so far below the belt, it could tie her shoes)

I am not on any other social media, only this board, so have no idea what happens elsewhere. I just judge and form an opinion by what I see happen on my tv.

As for the Monique thing, why did she need an army to fight her battles? Why couldn't it stay between the cast members? (Ok that goes for all of them, if they're recruiting for backup on SM.) When I get into an argument with someone, I don't go round up a posse. A posse of strangers. It's weird. 

[Yours Truly]

2 hours ago, RealReality said:

But what you've termed     "aggressive" personal boundary violation, as you said, can differ with each person.  

It seems just as intimidating to try to threaten someone's job if they aren't nice to you.  

Can you define what a "violent element" or "extreme infliction" is that isn't open to wild subjective interpretation? 

You don't know what a person has been through so if someone is offended by being bumped in line or having their shoe stepped on does this allow for them to administer a beating if you don't apologize or you blow them off?

You say you can't be nuanced but it seems like the entire point rests on things that are subjective, without much of a bright line rule which seems pretty nuanced to me.  

Whereas a bight line rule that physical violence is not acceptable when you can walk away IS a bright line rule. 

Violence is defined as "behavior involving physical force intended to hurt, damage, or kill someone or something"

So by its definition it appears that violence is only physical force and therefore likely would not include the things you've mentioned. 

 Nope, running up on someone aggressively and threatening as well as body language that is intimidating is pretty universal. Same as invading someone’s personal space during heated disagreements. No ways around interpreting that as aggressive. It may not be “viewed” that way in the attempt to excuse the behavior but trying to put it in some ambiguous category doesn’t cut it. 

I’m disgusted with CandyAss DELIBERATE acts of aggressiveness the same way Some are disgusted with Monquie’s stomping of that ass. Both were rooted in violence and aggression. Both won stupid prizes. To me there are no excuses to be made and none needed.

Cause at the end of the day They felt like acting out and they proceeded to act out and then proceeded to reap some very serious consequences. CandyAss seems to like the recipe tho so I wish her much luck with that cause she’s gonna need it. 💁🏻‍♀️😂

Edited November 16, 2021 by Yours Truly

[drivethroo]

7 hours ago, Rlb8031 said:

(As an aside, I often wonder why no one raises the question as to whether some of the Candiace stans are also friends and acquaintances)

Because Candiace wasn't seen as being close friends to the bloggers like Monique was.  Bloggers were seen wearing the same clothes Monique wore on the show (and said Monique gave it to them).  Monique would befriend a lot of the YouTube bloggers and they would change their tune about the fight---all of a sudden Candiace needs her ass beat when before it was "we should keep our hands to ourselves."  Monique was also named as a "special friend" in the dead blogger's obituary (the blogger who dedicated his life to harassing Candiace, Chris, Chris' ex-wife etc instead dedicating his life to dialysis.  He's the one Candiace told to "drop dead," then about a month later he indeed dropped dead and that fueled the bloggers even more to go after Candiace.)

We haven't seen that type of closeness with bloggers and any of the other cast members.  I believe the blog the cast is referencing this season is the same blog that was tearing down Candiace all last season (and that blog just so happens to be very close to Monique).

It's only recently that there are any pro-Candiace bloggers and a lot of that is because those particular bloggers kept seeing double standards, lies and flip flops from the cast members (and bloggers) towards Candiace (and only Candiace).

The difference between Candiace's social media antics and Monique's social media antics is again, the majority of the time, Candiace is responding to what somebody has said to her.  Somebody jumps on Twitter and says you need your ass beat, she responds. A cast member says something funky, she responds.

Monique had a coordinated social media smear campaign on Candiace that ran for at least 8 months before Season 5 started.  The story I began seeing in December 2019 was Candiace picked up a glass of wine and threw it in Monique's face so Monique had to defend herself but the cast was all on Candiace's side.  Candiace & the other cast members followed BRAVO's rules not to disclose what really happened so she didn't feel she could defend herself without breaching her contract.  Monique had bloggers and flunkies telling the story for her.  Season 5 didn't start until August 2020 so Monique had almost a year's head start in promoting her narrative of "Candiace ran up on her and threw a glass of wine in her face so Monique had to defend herself."

6 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

As for the Monique thing, why did she need an army to fight her battles? Why couldn't it stay between the cast members? (Ok that goes for all of them, if they're recruiting for backup on SM.) When I get into an argument with someone, I don't go round up a posse. A posse of strangers. It's weird. 

I don't know if you've seen the show from the beginning, but there was a foreshadowing of Monique's online army when her fan page (run by her brother or cousin) started attacking Robyn with a meme.   The meme itself IMO wasn't all that serious but Robyn felt it was serious and confronted Monique about it.  Monique tried to get out of it but it was eventually revealed that it was Monique's brother or cousin behind the fan page attacking Robyn.  I think this occurred in season 3.

So using an army of social media to attack a cast mate was nothing new to Monique because she had done it before to another cast mate.

Edited November 16, 2021 by drivethroo

[spunky]

10 minutes ago, drivethroo said:

Because Candiace wasn't seen as being close friends to the bloggers like Monique was.  Bloggers were seen wearing the same clothes Monique wore on the show (and said Monique gave it to them).  Monique would befriend a lot of the YouTube bloggers and they would change their tune about the fight---all of a sudden Candiace needs her ass beat when before it was "we should keep our hands to ourselves."  Monique was also named as a "special friend" in the dead blogger's obituary (the blogger who dedicated his life to harassing Candiace, Chris, Chris' ex-wife etc instead dedicating his life to dialysis.  He's the one Candiace told to "drop dead," then about a month later he indeed dropped dead and that fueled the bloggers even more to go after Candiace.)

We haven't seen that type of closeness with bloggers and any of the other cast members.  I believe the blog the cast is referencing this season is the same blog that was tearing down Candiace all last season (and that blog just so happens to be very close to Monique).

It's only recently that there are any pro-Candiace bloggers and a lot of that is because those particular bloggers kept seeing double standards, lies and flip flops from the cast members (and bloggers) towards Candiace (and only Candiace).

The difference between Candiace's social media antics and Monique's social media antics is again, the majority of the time, Candiace is responding to what somebody has said to her.  Somebody jumps on Twitter and says you need your ass beat, she responds. A cast member says something funky, she responds.

Monique had a coordinated social media smear campaign on Candiace that ran for at least 8 months before Season 5 started.  The story I began seeing in December 2019 was Candiace picked up a glass of wine and threw it in Monique's face so Monique had to defend herself but the cast was all on Candiace's side.  Candiace & the other cast members followed BRAVO's rules not to disclose what really happened so she didn't feel she could defend herself without breaching her contract.  Monique had bloggers and flunkies telling the story for her.  Season 5 didn't start until August 2020 so Monique had almost a year's head start in promoting her narrative of "Candiace ran up on her and threw a glass of wine in her face so Monique had to defend herself."

I don't know if you've seen the show from the beginning, but there was a foreshadowing of Monique's online army when her fan page (run by her brother or cousin) started attacking Robyn with a meme.   The meme itself IMO wasn't all that serious but Robyn felt it was serious and confronted Monique about it.  Monique tried to get out of it but it was eventually revealed that it was Monique's brother or cousin behind the fan page attacking Robyn.  I think this occurred in season 3.

So using an army of social media to attack a cast mate was nothing new to Monique because she had done it before to another cast mate.

Exactly! The only person who had friends posting for them was Monique. That same blog that was referenced on the show was one of many blogs that Monique befriended.  In fact their smear campaign was so bad that she wanted to kill herself (her words). But I guess her being suicidal is okay, because she's such a horrible person 🙄.

There are approximately 4 youtube bloggers who are pro Candiace, and that's because of the unwarranted hate that she gets. No one is telling Ashley that they hope all her babies die. No one is calling Gizelle a dog or any other type of animal. Gordon doesn't have to do an Instagram live telling Michael Rappaport to keep his wife's name out of his mouth (the first time he bad mouthed Candiace).

Mia threatened Candiace in front of Andy and her coworkers, and no one bats an eye. No one is tagging Bravo and telling them to fire her. But Candiace sneezes and everyone wants to hang her. If Candiace told someone to "Watch their back because their ass kicking was long overdue" she would've been immediately fired. Andy would not have sat there smirking.  

As you said there is a clear double standard, which is why those of us who like her are always defending her.

[WhatAmIWatching]

57 minutes ago, drivethroo said:

Because Candiace wasn't seen as being close friends to the bloggers like Monique was.  Bloggers were seen wearing the same clothes Monique wore on the show (and said Monique gave it to them).  Monique would befriend a lot of the YouTube bloggers and they would change their tune about the fight---all of a sudden Candiace needs her ass beat when before it was "we should keep our hands to ourselves."  Monique was also named as a "special friend" in the dead blogger's obituary (the blogger who dedicated his life to harassing Candiace, Chris, Chris' ex-wife etc instead dedicating his life to dialysis.  He's the one Candiace told to "drop dead," then about a month later he indeed dropped dead and that fueled the bloggers even more to go after Candiace.)

We haven't seen that type of closeness with bloggers and any of the other cast members.  I believe the blog the cast is referencing this season is the same blog that was tearing down Candiace all last season (and that blog just so happens to be very close to Monique).

It's only recently that there are any pro-Candiace bloggers and a lot of that is because those particular bloggers kept seeing double standards, lies and flip flops from the cast members (and bloggers) towards Candiace (and only Candiace).

The difference between Candiace's social media antics and Monique's social media antics is again, the majority of the time, Candiace is responding to what somebody has said to her.  Somebody jumps on Twitter and says you need your ass beat, she responds. A cast member says something funky, she responds.

Monique had a coordinated social media smear campaign on Candiace that ran for at least 8 months before Season 5 started.  The story I began seeing in December 2019 was Candiace picked up a glass of wine and threw it in Monique's face so Monique had to defend herself but the cast was all on Candiace's side.  Candiace & the other cast members followed BRAVO's rules not to disclose what really happened so she didn't feel she could defend herself without breaching her contract.  Monique had bloggers and flunkies telling the story for her.  Season 5 didn't start until August 2020 so Monique had almost a year's head start in promoting her narrative of "Candiace ran up on her and threw a glass of wine in her face so Monique had to defend herself."

I don't know if you've seen the show from the beginning, but there was a foreshadowing of Monique's online army when her fan page (run by her brother or cousin) started attacking Robyn with a meme.   The meme itself IMO wasn't all that serious but Robyn felt it was serious and confronted Monique about it.  Monique tried to get out of it but it was eventually revealed that it was Monique's brother or cousin behind the fan page attacking Robyn.  I think this occurred in season 3.

So using an army of social media to attack a cast mate was nothing new to Monique because she had done it before to another cast mate.

Wow, I didn't know it was all that deep off screen. Yikes and so bizarre, and rather scary. I'd forgotten all about the Robyn meme. I remember thinking it wasn't that bad, but that it was weird that Monique didn't own her part of it all. She didn't know about it, my fat ass. I see I've only had part of the picture by not reading blogs or SM, but I have no desire to wade into that pool, it's too negative and a bottomless rabbit hole.

29 minutes ago, spunky said:

Exactly! The only person who had friends posting for them was Monique. That same blog that was referenced on the show was one of many blogs that Monique befriended.  In fact their smear campaign was so bad that she wanted to kill herself (her words). But I guess her being suicidal is okay, because she's such a horrible person 🙄.

There are approximately 4 youtube bloggers who are pro Candiace, and that's because of the unwarranted hate that she gets. No one is telling Ashley that they hope all her babies die. No one is calling Gizelle a dog or any other type of animal. Gordon doesn't have to do an Instagram live telling Michael Rappaport to keep his wife's name out of his mouth (the first time he bad mouthed Candiace).

Mia threatened Candiace in front of Andy and her coworkers, and no one bats an eye. No one is tagging Bravo and telling them to fire her. But Candiace sneezes and everyone wants to hang her. If Candiace told someone to "Watch their back because their ass kicking was long overdue" she would've been immediately fired. Andy would not have sat there smirking.  

As you said there is a clear double standard, which is why those of us who like her are always defending her.

That is just sickening to read. I didn't know that Candiace was getting that much, and that graphic of, hate. What is wrong with people? The hunting down and harassing of cast and their extended family is disgusting. No one deserves that. Are we going to start hunting down and harass the cast (and their kin) from Law and Order now? (Is that still on? Lol) 

I have zero faith in Andy to ever do the right thing. I wish he'd go away. They need to find someone with a soul and a conscience to do his job. Micheal Rappaport is a big tool, and I used to like his movies/shows. He, silly old gossipy fool, can go too.
 

I can take or leave Candiace, but I do not like the different standards being applied to only her. It's crap.

[spunky]

36 minutes ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

Wow, I didn't know it was all that deep off screen. Yikes and so bizarre, and rather scary. I'd forgotten all about the Robyn meme. I remember thinking it wasn't that bad, but that it was weird that Monique didn't own her part of it all. She didn't know about it, my fat ass. I see I've only had part of the picture by not reading blogs or SM, but I have no desire to wade into that pool, it's too negative and a bottomless rabbit hole.

That is just sickening to read. I didn't know that Candiace was getting that much, and that graphic of, hate. What is wrong with people? The hunting down and harassing of cast and their extended family is disgusting. No one deserves that. Are we going to start hunting down and harass the cast (and their kin) from Law and Order now? (Is that still on? Lol) 

I have zero faith in Andy to ever do the right thing. I wish he'd go away. They need to find someone with a soul and a conscience to do his job. Micheal Rappaport is a big tool, and I used to like his movies/shows. He, silly old gossipy fool, can go too.
 

I can take or leave Candiace, but I do not like the different standards being applied to only her. It's crap.

It was really bad and still is. She's addressed her depression on her podcast and has alluded to it on social media.  She hasn't been as open about it as other public figures,  probably because of all the hate that she gets.

Michael Rappaport should have been canceled the minute he called Kenya Moore a gorilla. Andy only cares about the money and nothing else. 

Edited November 16, 2021 by spunky

[drivethroo]

Apparently now Mia's cousin is posting to her on IG saying she (cousin) should go find cousin and pop her and Mia's ki'ki'ing about it.  But why wouldn't she when 

• Andy Cohen blamed Candiace's mouth for being "almost" attacked last season (showing Andy didn't think it was that serious)
• Mia sat in front of Andy and the cast and announced Candiace was overdue for an asswhipping and nobody admonished her (not even Andy)
• Gizelle told Candiace, "well if Mia clocked you (oh well shrug)"

Some of the pro-Candiace YouTube bloggers are concerned because whenever they post reviews of the show and they are favorable towards Candiace, pro-Monique stans swarm their blogs and turn their comments into shambles.  One was even considering moving all of her Potomac reviews to a pay to see format. 

Monique actually started the social media bullying of Candiace right after the fight.  As shown and discussed on the show last season, Monique &  friends started tweeting about the fight 2 days after it happened.  That was October 2019.  Again, Season 5 didn't air until August 2020 so Monique had a 10 month headstart on crafting a narrative about the fight.

What any of the other cast members have experienced on social media is unlike what Candiace experienced.  The only other person I've seen with that level of social media abuse is Meghan Markle.

I just saw on a forum today where somebody screenshotted a Twitter account saying Candiace is lucky nobody has beat her ass at the store or in the neighborhood.  This twitter account has 14,000 followers.  Somebody must have hipped her to how bad that looked because she's deleted those tweets.

As I asked in the episode thread, do they really think Candiace is at Giant popping off on random people or reading somebody down in the dollar aisle at Target? 

I do think Candiace could benefit from her own social media manager now that her music career is getting under way.  She should leave the "Candiace" handle for promotion on social media and get a anonymous burner account for when she wants to talk $hit.

[spunky]

55 minutes ago, drivethroo said:

Apparently now Mia's cousin is posting to her on IG saying she (cousin) should go find cousin and pop her and Mia's ki'ki'ing about it.  But why wouldn't she when 

• Andy Cohen blamed Candiace's mouth for being "almost" attacked last season (showing Andy didn't think it was that serious)
• Mia sat in front of Andy and the cast and announced Candiace was overdue for an asswhipping and nobody admonished her (not even Andy)
• Gizelle told Candiace, "well if Mia clocked you (oh well shrug)"

Some of the pro-Candiace YouTube bloggers are concerned because whenever they post reviews of the show and they are favorable towards Candiace, pro-Monique stans swarm their blogs and turn their comments into shambles.  One was even considering moving all of her Potomac reviews to a pay to see format. 

Monique actually started the social media bullying of Candiace right after the fight.  As shown and discussed on the show last season, Monique &  friends started tweeting about the fight 2 days after it happened.  That was October 2019.  Again, Season 5 didn't air until August 2020 so Monique had a 10 month headstart on crafting a narrative about the fight.

What any of the other cast members have experienced on social media is unlike what Candiace experienced.  The only other person I've seen with that level of social media abuse is Meghan Markle.

I just saw on a forum today where somebody screenshotted a Twitter account saying Candiace is lucky nobody has beat her ass at the store or in the neighborhood.  This twitter account has 14,000 followers.  Somebody must have hipped her to how bad that looked because she's deleted those tweets.

As I asked in the episode thread, do they really think Candiace is at Giant popping off on random people or reading somebody down in the dollar aisle at Target? 

I do think Candiace could benefit from her own social media manager now that her music career is getting under way.  She should leave the "Candiace" handle for promotion on social media and get a anonymous burner account for when she wants to talk $hit.

This is getting out of hand.  If Candiace is going to stay with the show then she needs to hire security.  She should also file a complaint against Mia with NBC Universal.  Bypass Andy and Bravo and go straight to the top.

[Yours Truly]

Poor Candiace.  I hope she works it out.  I mean if it's that out of control on them twitter streets then maybe she would benefit from some PR tactic to gather shit up and quiet the villagers. I wonder what kind of approach that could possibly be tho?

 

Edited November 17, 2021 by Yours Truly

[WhatAmIWatching]

On 11/16/2021 at 8:12 PM, spunky said:

This is getting out of hand.  If Candiace is going to stay with the show then she needs to hire security.  She should also file a complaint against Mia with NBC Universal.  Bypass Andy and Bravo and go straight to the top.

Agreed. It may be time for nbc universal to step in and either vet all of their social media across the shows, to chill out some of the inflammatory or instigative posts, or somehow lay down some posting rules. Something needs to change! I sincerely hope they don't wait until someone is harmed or killed out in the wild over a stupid tv show.

[spunky]

2 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

Agreed. It may be time for nbc universal to step in and either vet all of their social media across the shows, to chill out some of the inflammatory or instigative posts, or somehow lay down some posting rules. Something needs to change! I sincerely hope they don't wait until someone is harmed or killed out in the wild over a stupid tv show.

Hopefully they step in soon, because this is getting out of hand. 

[RealReality]

On 11/16/2021 at 9:34 AM, Yours Truly said:

 Nope, running up on someone aggressively and threatening as well as body language that is intimidating is pretty universal. Same as invading someone’s personal space during heated disagreements. No ways around interpreting that as aggressive. It may not be “viewed” that way in the attempt to excuse the behavior but trying to put it in some ambiguous category doesn’t cut it. 

I’m disgusted with CandyAss DELIBERATE acts of aggressiveness the same way Some are disgusted with Monquie’s stomping of that ass. Both were rooted in violence and aggression. Both won stupid prizes. To me there are no excuses to be made and none needed.

Cause at the end of the day They felt like acting out and they proceeded to act out and then proceeded to reap some very serious consequences. CandyAss seems to like the recipe tho so I wish her much luck with that cause she’s gonna need it. 💁🏻‍♀️😂

Its so widely and well understood that you cannot define the concept.  LOL.  I see.  

I don't see any ambiguity in my point because it has always been a bright line between physical violence and everything else. 

Where I see ambiguity is with people who try to define what makes physical violence acceptable or understandable.  

And that makes sense because those concepts are ambiguous and dependent on each person. 

And because everyone who resorts to physical violence ALWAYS has a justification for it.  They surely can explain to you how their physical violence is okay, acceptable and understandable.  

Deliberate acts of aggression is another term that will vary from person to person unless its physical violence.  Some people are going to see a deliberate act of aggression when someone else steps on the foot, bumps them in line, gets that Black Friday parking space they wanted, honks their horn, flips them the bird on the freeway, but them off while they are driving or nabbing the last Yankee Candle in the clearance section at Ross when you had your eyes on it.  

As others have pointed out, a) people generally start up with Candiace and then cry foul when she hurts their feelings.  If her castmembers are so sensitive about verbal combat than a Real Housewife show is not the right venue for them. 

and b) multiple cast members have done as much or worse than what Candiace has said or done, but barely anyone advocated violence against them.  

A collar flick is not the same or even equitable to smashing someones head onto a table, punching it wildly and then chasing the person outside. To me, to try to equate the two is a stretch worthy of a yoga instructor.   

And if people are inclined to think that something as benign as a collar flip is the type of "aggressive act" that would make physical assault acceptable or understandable, then they should have that same energy for Mia, who put her hands all over Wendy after being repeatedly asked not to.  And for Ashley, who went back into a home that she had been kicked out of.  

Edited November 19, 2021 by RealReality

[spunky]

One thing about Candiace, she will get her check. 

https://www.instagram.com/p/CWcLASUsG9s/?utm_medium=copy_link

[drivethroo]

On 11/19/2021 at 8:41 AM, RealReality said:

And because everyone who resorts to physical violence ALWAYS has a justification for it.  They surely can explain to you how their physical violence is okay, acceptable and understandable.  

For example, Monique justified beating Candiace because Candiace "threw a glass of wine in her face," yet when we see the tapes, we see Monique started flicking Candiace's hair FIRST, then Candiace flicked Monique's lapel, then Gizelle pushed Monique while Candiace waved her hand in Monique's face, then Monique grabbed Candiace's head and slammed it down on the table, THEN Candiace busted Monique across the lip with the wine glass.

Monique started at Chapter 5 instead of telling us what happened in Chapters 1-4 to justify what she had been wanting to do to Candiace since the butter knife incident.

On 11/19/2021 at 8:41 AM, RealReality said:

And if people are inclined to think that something as benign as a collar flip is the type of "aggressive act" that would make physical assault acceptable or understandable, then they should have that same energy for Mia, who put her hands all over Wendy after being repeatedly asked not to.  And for Ashley, who went back into a home that she had been kicked out of.  

If those people really felt the collar flip was justification for Monique to beat Candiace then they would keep that same energy on Monique, who put her hands on Candiace FIRST by flicking Candiace's hair.

They all want to skip that part to justify why Monique needed to beat Candiace's ass.

Those people just want and need a justification for why Candiace (and Candiace only) needs her ass whipped; otherwise they should've been screaming for Mia to get HER ass beat by Wendy after putting her hands on and actually touching Wendy on at least 2 different occasions.

 

[drivethroo]

Apparently Funky Dineva threatened to "end" Candiace because she liked a tweet that called him a hypocrite.   He said he was a gatekeeper to public opinion and he could end her career if he chose to.  He said he didn't know what exactly she had done but he's letting her know to move wisely or he will finish her.

But it was Chris who actually said something about him and he backed down a little when Chris reached out to him.3

[Countess]

Candiace constantly gets painted as the worst housewife when it comes to her words and even Andy acts that way when he was kissing Tamra’s ass for 12 seasons acting like she was some kind of wonderful when she did many things worse than Candiace ever has said or done.

 

I never saw anyone saying that Tamra deserved a beat down nor anyone rallying for Tamra to get off the show the way people do with Candiace. Clearly there are different standards

[spunky]

8 hours ago, drivethroo said:

Apparently Funky Dineva threatened to "end" Candiace because she liked a tweet that called him a hypocrite.   He said he was a gatekeeper to public opinion and he could end her career if he chose to.  He said he didn't know what exactly she had done but he's letting her know to move wisely or he will finish her.

But it was Chris who actually said something about him and he backed down a little when Chris reached out to him.3

Funky Dineva was cool with Candiace and Chris, before former cast member started using him to smear Candiace. 

[drivethroo]

3 hours ago, spunky said:

Funky Dineva was cool with Candiace and Chris, before former cast member started using him to smear Candiace. 

I think that's part of it but not the whole of it.

Monique's brother and sister are gay.

Candiace had those homophobic tweets from years ago.

I think he hates Candiace because of those tweets and that made it easier to side with Monique.  He's never going to see it for Candiace so CHRIS needs to stop engaging in any way with Funky Dineva.  He needs to make rent next week so going on a tirade against Candiace is the easiest way to get paid. Lots of people eat nicely off of bashing Candiace so Candiace and Chris need to make them earn their checks another way.

[spunky]

21 minutes ago, drivethroo said:

I think that's part of it but not the whole of it.

Monique's brother and sister are gay.

Candiace had those homophobic tweets from years ago.

I think he hates Candiace because of those tweets and that made it easier to side with Monique.  He's never going to see it for Candiace so CHRIS needs to stop engaging in any way with Funky Dineva.  He needs to make rent next week so going on a tirade against Candiace is the easiest way to get paid. Lots of people eat nicely off of bashing Candiace so Candiace and Chris need to make them earn their checks another way.

I understand why Chris is upset, this a grown man threatening his wife. However I agree with you.  If both Chris and Candiace stop engaging with these fools,  a lot of their channels would no longer exist.

[Yours Truly]

Reading a room, assessing a situation, and watching what you say is something most people find useful in life for a variety of reasons (one being not getting your ass dragged) except Candiace. I mean there’s always AFFLAC and I’m pretty sure Bravo offers a stellar health plan. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Baltimore Betty]

On 11/24/2021 at 1:02 AM, drivethroo said:

Funky Dineva

Who is Funky Dineva? I see the name used in a few posts and cannot figure out who it is.

[Hiyo]

A gossip blogger and social media personality.

[drivethroo]

On 11/27/2021 at 5:49 AM, Baltimore Betty said:

Who is Funky Dineva? I see the name used in a few posts and cannot figure out who it is.

He's a YouTube blogger who has been doing videos on the Housewives for years.  One of his famous stunts was going out to Chateau Sheree to report on the progress of the sticks and dirt.  He currently has another gig as a co-host of Fox Soul with Claudia Jordan, formerly of RHOA.

[spunky]

https://www.instagram.com/p/CZGFpmQJD4g/?utm_medium=copy_link

So far Candiace is the only Black housewife addressing Jennie's racism towards Black people. 

[spunky]

Candiace said she was only using RHOP as a platform to launch her entertainment career.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CaVHaEfJdzb/?utm_medium=copy_link

 

Edited February 23, 2022 by spunky

[qtpye]

2 hours ago, spunky said:

Candiace said she was only using RHOP as a platform to launch her entertainment career.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CaVHaEfJdzb/?utm_medium=copy_link

 

Dang, that is a pretty big deal for her.

Also, we know Candiace. You needed both the paycheck and the exposure.

 

[spunky]

20 minutes ago, qtpye said:

Dang, that is a pretty big deal for her.

Also, we know Candiace. You needed both the paycheck and the exposure.

 

I hope she gets picked up for more tour dates. She did what she had to do to launch her career and become more financially independent.  Plus Chris made it known that he gave her a very strict timeline to get on the show and promote her projects.

[qtpye]

3 hours ago, spunky said:

I hope she gets picked up for more tour dates. She did what she had to do to launch her career and become more financially independent.  Plus Chris made it known that he gave her a very strict timeline to get on the show and promote her projects.

At least she made something out of her time on the show.

[drivethroo]

On 2/23/2022 at 8:49 PM, qtpye said:

At least she made something out of her time on the show.

And that's what all of them are supposed to do.  If the "Candiace is leaving" stories are true, it would be because of gigs like this, not because the cast is all of a sudden scared and in fear because Candiace threw a piece of lettuce at Mia.