BlackberryJam

Sorry. I suppose I didn't think to spoiler it because it was just so obvious, but some people didn't find it so.

Add me to team Wodehouse and team Wilde. I am a huge F. Scott Fitzgerald fan. His writing is so evocative, even if I don't like the particular story or plot.

Gone, Girl is a stinking piece of obvious shit and if I have to read that inane "cool girl" paragraph one more time, I might become a sociopath myself. It's a stupid women who hate women book and Poorly written, simplistic, drivel. Chelsea Cain's Heartsick series is evidence that the publishing world had done away with editors. The medical information, and even the type of drugs the hero is addicted to, are wrong. Even Wikipedia can help with basic drug facts. Gretchen whatever the fuck is neither a compelling nor interesting villain. Get thee to an editor! Or even a friend with a brain and internet access before publishing again.

I'll supply a new wish. I wish Catelyn Stark had married Littlefinger.

Unfortunately, the show has all but ignored the awesomeness of Stannis Baratheon, Grammar King by Right. He really is being short-changed. There have been no subtle reminders and hints about bad blood between Stannis and Brienne. And really, who would I root for in a Brienne/Stannis fight? She's my favorite warrior and he understands the subjunctive case of being. What is a fangirl to do? I also loved her sword conversation with Arya. Arya would have wanted to grow up to be Brienne if not for that whole murdering of her family thing.

I have questions about Brienne and her importance to the story. Really, if she's not roadtripping with Jaime and with Catelyn dead, what happens? The likelihood of Brienne finding Sansa or Arya and ...doing what with them, is low. However, they just shot a fucking badass fight. If the Hound dies and then Brienne becomes insignificant, what's the point of having a kickass fight between two characters who take the dirt nap or fall off the map?

As to the "raping his twin" allegation, no matter how the scene looked to us as viewers, Cersei was not portrayed as a victim of rape after that scene. Yes, it was shot poorly, but bad direction does not equal rape. Cersei is the one manipulating Jaime with sex in Episode 10. So, let's take that one off the table. Heh, table. In the grand scheme of GoT, there are probably...2 characters (of the ones that get real screen time) who aren't completely awful people? Yeah, I'm going with two. Sam and Brienne. Every single other character is morally gray and should probably be toasted like a marshmallow. When the White Walkers are better parents than pretty much every single parent in Westeros, singling out Jaime for bad behavior is pretty silly. Jaime, unlike most of the other characters, has done good. If we are looking at it like a toasty marshmallow checkbook, Jaime has serious positives on his side. He saved Brienne from rape. He saved Brienne from a bearpit. He saved King's Landing from Aerys. He offered to pimp himself out for his brother. He ultimately released his brother. No matter that some of those things might have had personal positives, he still did good things. And what's really so awful about taunting the woman who is holding you captive and who has hit you in the head with a rock? Honestly, taunting your captors counts in Jaime's favor. Especially taunting her with what she and he believes is the truth. Is Catelyn somehow to be protected from comments about her husband's fidelity? What makes her such a special snowflake? This woman started a war based on the word of a PIMP. Mocking is the least of what she deserves. So motion found frivolous. Summarily dismissed. Costs to poster.

I think Jaime and Lady Stoneheart will be Brienne's big moment. She'll end up breaking her vow to Lady Stoneheart/Catelyn because she loves Jaime. It will be her Mad King moment. I have a hard time thinking Jaime can't tell she's lying. What happens with that really holds my interest.

Seriously. A genetic marker? Stupid stupid stupid. In Season 4, ER was very clunky in a lot of her scenes. Clunky is kind. I don't need to see more of that. I do, however, want to see the original. Audrey, like Lucy and Sarah, was a borrowed personality. If we are going to have Audrey, I want the real Audrey back. I liked her and her boyfriend, Brad.

We, the viewers, know Cersei is a wine-saturated, willing to kill her child, down with murdering her husband's bastards, Lancel fucking, Qyburn funding bitch. Jaime knows Cersei is his sister, his love, the mother of his children. He knows she says cutting and cruel things. He knows she hates Tyrion. He's always known she hates Tyrion though. That's nothing new. Jaime still wants to bang her. Jaime and Cersei's arcs require a rift. I don't think Jaime needed the rift with Tyrion and while some of Tyrion's actions make less sense without the rift from Jaime, I think the story can be easily adjusted to have Tyrion protecting Jaime.

Oh, just like Cersei, I think Jaime thinks he can have it all. I doubt Jaime has even thought through the repercussions of freeing Tyrion, at least not those related to Cersei. Jaime has no idea Cersei is building the Mountainstein. He doesn't know about Lancel. I don't think he even knows she was ready to kill Tommen.

Guy went a full year with no play and then only got some next to the corpse of his dead son. So when sister comes waving her coochie at him and promising him the world, of course little Jaime is coming out to play.

It looks like a major set up for Cersei and Jaime fall out next season. Cersei just got everything she wanted and she's going to have it ripped away the very next morning.

In the tubs at Harrenhal, Jaime told Brienne about the killing of Aerys Targaryen. How he'd planned to burn King's Landing and then ordered Jaime to kill Tywin. It's what got him named Kingslayer. Ned Stark found Jaime sitting on the Iron Throne with Aerys dead at his feet.

On the far right, that's Ben Mankiewicz of the big film family, grandfather co-wrote Citizen Kane. Ben also does some hosting on AMC. I like him, but I'm not watching a review as long as the show.

The audition dialogue says Jaime is smuggled into Dorne. He wouldn't need to be smuggled if he were delivering the Mountain's head.

Wish granted! Arya makes it to White Harbor from the Vale. Just then, Gendry, who has been rowing for a year now, comes ashore. While Gendry wants to just sleep on land, Arya forces him to row her out to sea. They spend eternity rowing around Westeros and bickering I wish Stannis and Melisandre had a real son.

Oh, if we are working out ways to kill Littlefinger, can I suggest he has to fuck Lady Stoneheart the way he fucked Lysa Arryn? And during the fucking, she sucks the life from him. Uhm. So, totally gross but he's always wanted Catelyn.

I've read that theory before when it was posted, the theory that Jaime lied. It still doesn't hold up to scrutiny. I think there are plenty of reasons to hate Jaime (and those are most of the reasons that I love him), but this idea that he killed Aerys for kicks and lied to Brienne doesn't make sense. I go back to this post I made in this thread on page 1, March 28. There are ton of practicality issues through the book and the series. I mean, in just the last episode, did none of the Night's Watch notice the campfires of the wildlings? Did they not send out scouts? How come they only noticed when the fire was massive? Seriously Why was the Mountain killing peasants? Did they just give him people for murder practice? Did not make sense. This is the same series where Jaime banging Cersei is scandal but Aerys marrying his sister is business as usual. Yes, I know, Cersei was married to the king, but the way they have Olenna talking to Tywin about incest as if it's the great Satan is ridiculous considering the history of the Crown. I loved DR and CD in the scene but was rolling my eyes. Oh oh, and Roose Bolton can get his psycho son legitimized but super honorable yet beheads innocent men Ned doesn't even ask his best friend to legitimize Jon Snow. Not to mention Catelyn Stark arresting the Queen's brother on the word of a brothel owner. That still makes me want to bang my head into a desk. The issue about the wildfyre is left unresolved. How much was made and how much was found. There's no definitive answer, but considering all other things, it's more likely that Jaime was telling the truth, or at least the truth as he believed it to be, rather than lying.

I think that Jaime's story will be one that brings the other major players together, but I think his survival is up in the air. Everyone wants to kill him. Dany, the Stark contingent, Tyrion, the Tullys, Lady Stoneheart and eventually Cersei. The only person who wants Jaime alive is Brienne I think. Sure, it would be GRRM like to let him live. Like I fully expect Walder Frey to be alive in the end as well. Still, most families can unite in their desire to have Jaime dead. If Jaime's role in the big picture is to get Lightbringer to AA, that gives him real story, has him choose honor over family and tie story togeher. One of the big issues I have is that so many of these stories are separate from each other. They need to come together in the end. Although really, Dany could stay in Meereen. Whatever. She bores me.

Wanted to weigh in on Lightbringer/Nissa Nissa. There are very few important swords on the show right now. Really, we've got Oathkeeper and Widow's Wail, which Jaime seems to have at Tommen's crowning. I read this theory on Lightbringer. http://www.reddit.com/r/asoiaf/comments/1ds3j0/spoilers_all_brienne_and_the_forging_prophecy/ I think Jaime is one of the few characters who has crossed different stories. He's had scenes with Jon Snow (which ties in the Wall story), the Starks, the Boltons, and Tullys as well history with the Targaryens and the Baratheons and he's a Lannister. His story hasn't been limited in location and contacts. Unlike say Cersei, she has been connected to Starks and King's Landing, nothing else. Jon Snow has interaction with Starks and the Wall, brief interaction with Tyrion. Dany is way out doing her own thing. Jaime, as a character, can bring these stories together. (Tyrion can also do this as he's had multiple cross story interactions, but Tyrion is not connected to a sword. Jaime is.) That make me think Jaime has a bigger role to play. Jaime goes through a real change. Initially, he's all "I'll kill children just to fuck Cersei" but by the time he's doing his Riverlands campaign, he's "no rapin', no senseless murderin'." The last we've seen of him, he's ignored Cersei's letter and gone off with Brienne for the sake of honor. That makes me think that Jaime, if not Nissa Nissa himself, will end up with Brienne, who will forge Lightbringer by killing Catelyn, taking the sword to Jon Snow who is AA. Jaime will leave behind all that is Lannister, including Cersei, to fulfill this quest. That will be his story. Will he survive after? Who knows.

Wish Granted! Tormund does become King Beyond the Wall. However, his beard frightens the other tribes. He's unable to unite them for the attack on the Wall. Instead, the Wildlings get wiped out by the White Walkers and those that survive head to the Wall for sanctuary. However, Thorne goes douchey and refused to take them in. Wildlings dead. Game continues. I wish Jaime had been the one to kill Joffrey.

Wish Granted! Ned Stark grows a brain and supports Renly as King after Robert's death. He escapes King's Landing and is never beheaded. Rallying the North for Renly, when it appears the Lannister forces are going to be defeated, Tywin brokers a deal with Renly. Renly will be named King, but because Renly is unable to bed a woman, he must name Joffrey his heir. Because Renly loves Loras's sweet sweet ass, he agrees, assuming he'll live forever. He's wrong, of course. Stannis sprays a smoke monster up Melisandre's vagina. The Smoke Monster still kills Renly. Joffrey becomes King. The game continues. I wish Tyrion had a teenage son.

Wish granted! Pedofinger makes a move on Sansa. She tries to run away but trips into Robin Arryn. He asks her to pull out her milkers because he wants a drink. She recoils in horror and flings herself out the Moon Door only to discover that like Sister Betrille, she can fly. She flies down to the Bloody Gate and meets Arya, who is rolling on the ground in her own urine from laughing. Arya, still in her near hysterical state, decides that everything that has happened to her is all Sansa's fault since she lied about Mycah, the butcher's boy. Arya pulls out Needle and kills Sansa. She then grabs the Hound and they run. Pedofinger has, by that time, made his way to the Bloody Gate. Unable to cope with the loss of yet another Tully woman, he cuts off dead!Sansa's hair and makes a wig of it. He also puts on the dress and makes everyone call him Lady Tully. The game continues. I wish Jaime has lost his left hand instead of his right.

You should create a thread for re-writing scenes so we can all play!