Panopticon

Yup. Any time anyone starts to feel sorry for Anna, remember that this is how she opted to use her son to make a statement at a Christmas party.

What a waste. They went to all the trouble of having Philip go nuts over Brady/Chloe AGAIN… only to have Chloe leave anyway, and resume pretending that putting Brady with the woman who raped him and tortured his family is a valid choice. They could have done a sweet Phloe reunion and sent them into the sunset. Instead both are offscreen and Philip is in ruins as a character for no reason. And Brady’s onscreen position is in no way improved. I guess it runs in the family. Lucas and Sami could have gone off into the sunset. Instead both are offscreen and Lucas is in ruins as a character for no reason. And EJ’s onscreen position is in no way improved.

I saw the thread was hot and was hoping for a scandal— counterfeit bunk beds smuggled in from Danger America or something. But Jed! remains boringly smug instead of scandalously smug, so it’s just another baby. Hmph.

As an adult sure. I thought you meant as a kid.

I definitely remember Nicole and Young Johnny having a relationship. When Sami went into the witness protection program with Rafe, Nicole defaulted into being Johnny's mother figure. There was a stupid faux cliffhanger of newly-free Sami showing up at the DiMansion yelling "I've come for my baby," and meaning Johnny rather than Sydney, who was still thought to be Nicole's. (Nicole's answer: "Johnny's not a baby, he's a little boy! Learn to speak English!") Then for round 2 of EJole, Nicole returned to EJ (even though she preferred Brady) in relevant part because EJ used proximity to BOTH Sydney and Johnny to bribe her. And when Nicole talked about losing children and/or wanting a baby of her own, she would periodically mention both of EJ's kids as well as Parker. Nicole and Johnny were always fond of each other. It wasn't as intense as Nicole/Sydney or as plot-pointy-featured as Abby/Johnny, but it was a thing.

Allie weirdly never had an opinion while her twin Johnny whined nonstop about wanting mommy with her rapist. (Okay, so Johnny occasionally changed teams and preferred Sami/Rafe.)

At least Jack and Jennifer actually mentioned the bone marrow transplant toward the end of that story when they realized Abby had been stalking Austin. I’m much more open to creep when it’s acknowledged as creepy. I really liked the first substantive scenes Jack and Bo had together on Ernesto’s island right before Hope’s “death.” Bo explicitly said that Jack wasn’t living down to his reputation. They were never going to be close friends, but I thought they got along well enough as very different men married to close cousins (and then men involved with women who were BFFs when Bo moved on to Carly/Billie).

My details are shaky because this happened before I was born and I've never seen a clip. But in 1977, Julie's friend Sharon Duvall was in a "free-wheeling" marriage. Sharon said her husband cheated a lot; the husband said Sharon had daddy issues. Doug said Julie should stay the hell out of it, lol. Sharon started showering Julie with gifts and eventually confessed her love to Julie, who panicked and ran out of the room. Sharon slit her wrists but lived. Dr. Marlena did some counseling, and the story ended abruptly with Sharon leaving town, although not before having a less dramatic moment of closure with Julie and giving Julie a special cameo.

I have no desire to see that, though. I hated it when Daniel showed up and slept with all of his patients, was portrayed as a hero for doing so, and ruined at least five romantic or platonic relationships I loved. I hated it when Daniel's death left Nicole wailing for a year despite the fact that I never thought he was among the top three most important men in her history. And I REALLY hated the posthumous miracle baby nonsense just when we should have been done with Daniel. (Eric and Nicole both hit forty without children AND THEY DIDN'T HAVE THEIR MIRACLE BABY TOGETHER?! Nicole's babies with EJ died, but the baby with the dead pervy doctor lived? The embryo Kristen stole was a get out of jail free card for Theresa instead of the result of Brady/Nicole's longtime friends with benefits arrangements?) So Holly yelling at Eric for something Eric did (run away) because of Eric's longtime personality would interest me. Holly yelling at Eric over a plot point (Dan's death), and subjecting Salem to yet another round of "Dr. Dan was an angel among us" would bore me. I'd rather Ericole broke up forever if they're just going to revolve around Dan yet again.

Brandon had been around for a little bit then, but he had temporarily switched his interest from Sami to Jennifer. So Sami at that point was chasing Brandon rather than Austin (who had left town after his failed Vegas wedding to Sami), but she was still focused on exactly one man. At the climax of the B&B mini-story, Sami told Jennifer off for leading on Jack, Brandon, and Collin simultaneously. It wasn’t for another five years or so that Sami became the one always keeping multiple men in play (at least two of Rafe, EJ, and Lucas at any given time).

Multiple times. The whole plot point was that he couldn’t bring himself to reject Greta so he made up the story about being gay. I can’t think of an earlier time when the word “gay” was said, although a woman fell in love with Julie decades earlier…

Eric is high on my list of all time favorite characters and Ericole is high on my list if all time favorite couples. But boy do I ever wish Holly would read Eric for filth for agreeing to be her daddy and then taking off… especially if it led to Eric dealing with the way his own parental figures ditched him (some voluntarily, some not) when he was Holly’s age.

80s-early 90s Jack oozed chemistry all over the place with women he was never meant to be with. Crazy rivalry chemistry with Genie Francis’ Diana. I wonder about the alternate universe where Marlena came back for Rojohn in 88 and Jennifer followed Frankie to New York, leaving Jack and Diana to have hatesex while arguing about who should own the Spectator. Lovely friendship chemistry with Isabella that could have been more. And I know a lot of Jack fans hate Billie because she had that line about Jack being “sexless,” but I thought the vibe was good there too. Right before Jack and Jennifer were married off, Jack’s marriage of convenience to Charlotte Ross’s Eve actually could have turned into a real marriage under other circumstances. In the absolutely awful “Jack believes he’s dying” story when JnJ were first married, Jack tried to set Brian up as Jennifer’s next husband. One problem among many: Jack/Ginger had much better chemistry than Brian/Jennifer. And I don’t even like Ginger! Honorable mention to the 2002 mini-story of Jack and Sami in the haunted B&B. Back before Sami perpetually flounced around town with a pack of men trailing in her wake for no apparent reason.

I was surprised and delighted that the show really drove home Kim’s past with Victor in that story. There was a hilarious moment when Brady asked why Kim hated his grandfather so much and Kim looked at him like he was the dumbest human being to ever draw breath. (To be fair, there’s no reason Brady should know the dirty details of what Victor got up to long before Brady was born… but it was still funny.) On a show where the local serial killer gets to be the toast of the town because he has great abs, I adore that Kim shows up all “allow me to have flashbacks to my glorious 1985 hair and makeup while I continue to hate Victor.”

I think Victor might suck it up and stomach Claire calling him pop-pop because he was glad to have her in his life, but I can’t imagine him liking it. As for who comes back for the inevitable tribute, until proven otherwise I’ll expect that everything will revolve around Ciara and Ben until the ghostly form of Daniel Jonas visits from heaven to announce that Victor has safely entered the next world. My self-indulgent fantasy includes, among other things that can’t actually happen for assorted real-life reasons: Shane and Kim escorting Tate to his great-grandfather’s funeral and privately making sure Victor’s really dead. Simultaneous appearances by all four of Justin’s sons. Simultaneous appearances by all of Bo’s surviving children. That means Chelsea, too. The reappearance of Philip’s long-lost son Tyler, possibly out for revenge. Lucas has a flashback to being a teenager playing tennis with Victor. Because this is my fantasy, I’m partial to Lucas, and those scenes were cute. All of Victor’s ex-wives having a drink together. Most especially Vivian. Non-wives like Yvette can come too. (And since this is fiction, Diana can appear in the form of Genie Francis and ignore anything attributed to the character in the last five years.) Victor’s will takes a week to read because he’s called out 100 different Salemites by name, just for giggles. Jennifer Aniston makes a cameo as the head of the crime family who absorbed Victor’s Greek businesses. Bonus points if she actually speaks Greek in the process.

Right before the Cruise of Deception, Bo and Hope had a major fight about whether they were going to return to Salem so Shawn-D could go to a normal school or stay on the ocean forever. Bo’s reason for wanting to stay at sea? He didn’t want Victor to have access to Shawn-D! After Hope’s “death” at Ernesto’s hands, Bo acceded to her wishes and took little Shawn home. Victor tried to comfort his motherless grandson— only to have toddler!Shawn pipe up “my mommy didn’t like you.” When Victor did get some access to Shawn, he discussed “bribing a jury” in front of him, not knowing that Shawn-D had recovered from a bout of deafness. Shawn-D was smart enough to wait until he was alone with Bo to ask “what’s a bribe and what’s a jury?” and Bo used Shawn-D to get Victor convicted. And of course Shawn was well aware that Victor essentially kept Carly prisoner when Carly wanted to be with Bo… even if he didn’t know the details of Victor dropping Carly down an elevator shaft while trying to murder Bo and leave Shawn an orphan. Shawn definitely understood it when Bo was dying of Lawrence’s virus (little Shawn-D had to call 911), and Victor refused to help until Carly implied that she would sleep with him if he did. By the time Ciara came along, Victor had been majorly softened by Isabella’s death; Shawn Senior was gone; and Bo/Hope were no longer so concerned about putting restrictions on their children’s access to Victor. But I kind of love that Shawn-D remained a product of the era in which he grew up. (Though truthfully his attitude toward Victor was probably more informed by Victor trying to steal Claire for Philip.)

Indistinguishable, as both can help clean up cracker crumbs.

I wonder if someone at Radar Online typed this line with a straight face: (Though come on… it’s not shocking that even disgusting prisoners get to eat and watch a movie on a major holiday.)

For approximately three seconds I took leave of my senses and considered doing this. Thankfully I snapped out of it.

This is the woman who bragged about beating her toddler in an arts and crafts competition. So, yes, she’d sabotage her least favorite daughter the bride.

Conspiracy theory: to the limited extent that David ever noticed his children, (and Kaylee) was his favorite, thus leading to Jill feeling threatened and cutting down (and Kaylee) whenever she could. And David genuinely had some mixed feelings about not seeing as much of (and Kaylee) after she leaves home with her new headship.

I loved peppermint patties. One year I went trick-or-treating with a friend and her neighbor gave her TWO peppermint patties and me one… something else. I just could not fathom the cruelty of the world in that moment. Least favorite: Twizzlers.

Generally considered “the hot twin” at least, since he was the designated sinner and Jed! was a mini-Josh.

It would be funny if the show’s creative team chose to cast her because they figured her smug disdain for everyone around her would come through on stage and suit the character she’s playing (which it does).

At the time, Roark C gave interviews in the soap rags explaining that he had so much other work (Pretty Little Liars, V) that he couldn’t make it to the set to shoot the big group scenes with the other returning guest stars. So the show segregated Mike in the hospital rather than leave him out entirely. It may have been the best choice out of bad options. I remember when Alison Sweeney wasn’t available to shoot Shawn Senior’s funeral scenes so they shot Sami’s reaction separately and cut it as if she was in the room with everyone else but in a corner not touching or interacting with or getting too close to the others. It looked ridiculous, and it would have looked even more ridiculous if they’d tried it with Mike by Alice’s coffin. Nick/Eve did have gung-ho inappropriate chemistry at the time, but I rolled my eyes a lot at the falling chandelier. (Weirdly, I thought their chemistry fell way off once she finally got old enough that they weren’t a total taboo and they had their brief official relationship.)