S15.E02: Week 2

[OnceSane]

Quote

Drag queens Alaska and Alyssa Edwards and runway coach Miss J. Alexander host a pageant for eight hopeful bachelors; one bachelor races through the mud on a one-on-one date; eight men gear up for a roller derby competition hosted by Fred Willard.

Airs May 20, 2019.

[leighdear]

Oh good lord, could Luke P. possibly wear a bigger gold cross?  Jesus much, dude?  About as subtle as a sledgehammer.  

Miss J!!!!

[leighdear]

Mike has NAILED walking in those heels!  He's a great sport!

AaaaHHHH!  The Hanna song is hysterical!!!!

[saber5055]

Color me cranky I guess. I know this show has to make itself "interesting" and I know all the guys are mirror peacocks in love with themselves who wish they would get filmed naked in the shower, but I really don't want to see them strutting around in speedos. The closeups of the crotch is a bit OTT as well.

I haven't seen ANTM for a long time so don't know if Miss J is still on that or not.

[leighdear]

Dylan reminds me of Dean a little.   I love Alaska....too funny to hear her comments!

John Paul Jones is just not.  But the unicycle was ok. 

Hannah is having a ball.  I'm glad they didn't bring any of her "friends" in.  

Sorry, Luke P.'s body is too much.  Obviously he's a gym rat which means obsession.  

Jed's blowing them out of the water. 

[saber5055]

Bachelorette history I guess with a Bach declaring his love on the first date. Ugh.

[leighdear]

BLECH! 

The "judges" reactions are just priceless though.

Saber.....ANTM is over as a franchise, but Miss J was on til the end.  

[LakeGal]

I just don't like Luke P,  The more I see him the less I like him.  

[saber5055]

2 minutes ago, LakeGal said:

I just don't like Luke P,  The more I see him the less I like him.  

Did he get the first impression rose last week? I sort of mentally tuned out.

[JenE4]

Luke is a weasel. If he has to use the word “genuine” when declaring his love on a first group date after having spoken to Hannah for 15 minutes total of his life, then we know he’s disingenuous! Boo! Jed was robbed! (Now that was some talent! Even if he is this season’s Wes.) 

Why were half of them wearing socks with their speedos?

[Ohwell]

I turned in for the first time this season just to see who the guys were.  I enjoyed the Magic Mike show, but I can't take any more of Hannah's beauty pageant teeth and that twang.  

[talktoomuch]

Thay one dude with the black dad socks who slapped his own ass...no...just no.

[saber5055]

Just now, JenE4 said:

Why were half of them wearing socks with their speedos?

Oh, that was SO NASTY. All I could see were the socks, even with the camera focused on crotch shots.

[leighdear]

Luke P. is a knob.  He's playing the role.  Jeez, he's thirsty. 

Mike just lost me with the "I want to do a cheers to.......".  Ugh!  It's a toast, not a cheers, dude!

[Ohwell]

24 minutes ago, leighdear said:

Miss J!!!!

I loved her expressions when the guys walked down the runway. 

[leighdear]

Just now, Ohwell said:

I loved her expressions when the guys walked down the runway. 

And I loved that she's sporting the Louise Brooks, short cut with bangs!  (Probably a wig, I know....*LOL*)

Noooooo!  Hannah, he's a crap-weasel!  He's lying! 

[saber5055]

Luke P = dickweed. I'd be weirded out by some guy who was falling in love with me before he even met me.

[leighdear]

Oooh, I just caught a weird little John Krazinski cast to Luke P's face.  Strange

[Ohwell]

It's probably been said before but since this is my first time seeing him, I noticed that Luke P. looks just like Bryce Harper.

17 minutes ago, talktoomuch said:

Thay one dude with the black dad socks who slapped his own ass...no...just no.

I didn't mind the ass slapping, but what the hell was he thinking with those black socks?

Edited May 21, 2019 by Ohwell

[JenE4]

I’m going to write my local congressman to declare Luke P Here For The Wrong Reasons. And Hannah is a fucking idiot for thinking he actually loves her. Season’s over? 

[leighdear]

Are dark denim jackets still a thing for guys?  Looks very middle-school to me. 

[SHD]

I don’t know...I think there would be an uproar if the women on The Bachelor were forced to put on the tiniest thong bikinis (not of their choosing) and walk down a runway while a crowd of guys whooped and hollared. I just thought that was kind of gross for a first date activity.

[saber5055]

Luke keeps saying he's never experienced anything like this before in his life. I take that to mean all the cameras filming him 24/7, the chance to "win" this show, the chance to be on DWTS, the chance to have his own reality show, the chance to be on the cover of People magazine, yada yada yada. And oh yeah, there's Hannah. Follow the script, dude, and blow smoke at her HARD so your script, I mean your feelings, come true.

Hannah's a tool for buying such BS. Talk about being easy.

Just now, SHD said:

I don’t know...I think there would be an uproar if the women on The Bachelor were forced to put on the tiniest thong bikinis (not of their choosing) and walk down a runway while a crowd of guys whooped and hollared. I just thought that was kind of gross for a first date activity.

So much YES to this.

[Ohwell]

Jed got the pity rose.

[leighdear]

Luke is pissed he didn't get that rose.  

On Farmer Chris's season, the girls DID have to drive tractors down a busy LA street wearing just Bikinis.  That was pretty revealing.

[Ohwell]

5 minutes ago, SHD said:

I don’t know...I think there would be an uproar if the women on The Bachelor were forced to put on the tiniest thong bikinis (not of their choosing) and walk down a runway while a crowd of guys whooped and hollared. I just thought that was kind of gross for a first date activity.

I agree.  I did feel kind of ashamed of myself for looking at them, even though I enjoyed it, and they shouldn't have had to do that.  

[SHD]

John Paul Jones looks and acts like a combination of a young Ty Pennington and every stoner I knew in high school. 

[LakeGal]

I believe Luke P could be the obsessed stalker type guy.

[JenE4]

4 minutes ago, leighdear said:

Are dark denim jackets still a thing for guys?  Looks very middle-school to me. 

Jed’s denim jacket is the only tally in the cons list so far. Otherwise, he’s winning me over with his cute looks and his smooth as silk voice. He’s now joined Mike on my list of the two guys I know by name and like so far.

[saber5055]

3 minutes ago, leighdear said:

On Farmer Chris's season, the girls DID have to drive tractors down a busy LA street wearing just Bikinis.  That was pretty revealing.

I remember that tractor drive but couldn't remember FOR SURE that the women were wearing bikinis. I guess I, thankfully, had blocked that from my memory bank.

[leighdear]

Tyler is a serious cutie.  He has a bit of a Jarrod Haibon look to him. But better looking.  And not attached to Ashley I. 

[saber5055]

Tyler ... is he the dancing construction worker? I thought he had a "T" name.

[JudyObscure]

4 minutes ago, SHD said:

I don’t know...I think there would be an uproar if the women on The Bachelor were forced to put on the tiniest thong bikinis (not of their choosing) and walk down a runway while a crowd of guys whooped and hollared. I just thought that was kind of gross for a first date activity.

I think it's gross, too, but Hannah's whole claim to fame is being Miss Alabama, a title earned primarily by wearing  a tiny bikini and walking down a runway while a crowd whoops and hollars and a panel of judges examines her for cellulite.  You might call it this year's theme.

[Ohwell]

So she wears an all white outfit to "sling some mud."  Yeah, right.

[Kiss my mutt]

That Christian playboy is playing to win and I don’t believe him for a hot second. I’m not feeling Jed either. She has a terrible picker. 

[JenE4]

8 minutes ago, leighdear said:

Are dark denim jackets still a thing for guys?  Looks very middle-school to me. 

2 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Jed’s denim jacket is the only tally in the cons list so far. Otherwise, he’s winning me over with his cute looks and his smooth as silk voice. He’s now joined Mike on my list of the two guys I know by name and like so far.

Nevermind. Jed gets a total pass on his jean jacket after seeing Hannah’s full white denim ensemble!

[leighdear]

On first Ben's season, the ladies had to "snow" ski down a busy street in bikinis.  I think they get the girls in bikinis some way in every season.  Sean had a Polar Bear dip on his season. 

[saber5055]

Is there a reason Hannah has a muddy handprint on her boob?

[Ohwell]

4 minutes ago, leighdear said:

Sean had a Polar Bear dip on his season. 

I remember that.  Didn't one of the sensible women refuse to do it?  I didn't blame her.

[leighdear]

Damn!  He's got pretty eyes....

[saber5055]

Hannah: "Just tell me how much you like me and how hot I am."

[leighdear]

Just now, Ohwell said:

I remember that.  Didn't one of the sensible women refuse to do it?  I didn't blame her.

I think it was Tierra.  She supposedly sparkled, according to her mom.  *LOL*

[Ohwell]

4 minutes ago, leighdear said:

I think it was Tierra.  She supposedly sparkled, according to her mom.  *LOL*

Sparkled?

[jette]

Yes, Tierra did have a sparkle...and a mean streak. Too bad, girl was pretty.

So is Tyler...yowza!

Ooo, and altruistic too!

Edited May 21, 2019 by jette
Details

[leighdear]

When Tierra wasn't snarking at other contestants, she was sobbing to the camera that her mom always told her to not let people steal her "sparkle".  

I can't believer I remember this crap so easily....*sigh*

[Ohwell]

6 minutes ago, leighdear said:

When Tierra wasn't snarking at other contestants, she was sobbing to the camera that her mom always told her to not let people steal her "sparkle".  

I can't believer I remember this crap so easily....*sigh*

Ahhh, ok.  What a special snowflake!

[Adeejay]

How on earth did I not notice Tyler G; he is incredibly good looking!  He reminds me of a young Perry King.

[leighdear]

Looks like Luke P shaves his chest.  Stupid if you aren't a professional swimmer or diver.  

Sorry, I'm going to slam him every time.  I cannot stand him, and that won't change.  

Yeah, I'm judging him.  

[talktoomuch]

Just now, leighdear said:

Looks like Luke P shaves his chest.  Stupid if you aren't a professional swimmer or diver.  

Sorry, I'm going to slam him every time.  I cannot stand him, and that won't change.  

Yeah, I'm judging him.  

Table for two.

[saber5055]

It occurred to me that Hannah, who is obsessed with being a beauty queen, would gravitate to Luke P, who also is obsessed with being a beauty queen.

I predict he's the "winner" if it can be called that.

I'm giving my vote to Tyler and his eyes. For me, not Hannah. Dude deserves to be free!

1 minute ago, leighdear said:

Looks like Luke P shaves his chest.  Stupid if you aren't a professional swimmer or diver.  

Where have you been? All the guys on this show shave their chest. It's a gym-rat thing, shows off the abs to their best advantage. And chest hair gets in the way when they "oil up." (Barf)