S08.E09: One Month Down, Forever To Go

[humbleopinion]

AJ does look like a prince compared to Puke but Steph will not tolerate forever his hissy fits and pissy snappish tantrums.

As much as she wants a marriage if AJ continues to boil over for the stupidest whims then she will tired of his outbursts.

Hoping AJ will calm the hell down when the cameras go away.

[configdotsys]

16 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Yes & I recall as soon as he saw her walking in at the wedding, him turning to someone (maybe a groomsman?), & saying "I knew it would be her" - I've wondered about that too.

I remember him saying to his friend, "I know her."

Edited: Just rewatched. When Kate comes in he says in a voice over that she looks “beautiful but I recognized her immediately.” Then he looks at the friends and says “I think I know her.” Then another voiceover he says, “Oh my God, I’ve met this girl before.” Then after a hug and chit chat, another voiceover, “I don’t think she recognized me, very surprised, because we met like three weeks ago?”

Edited March 1, 2019 by configdotsys
hug not huge

[seacliffsal]

48 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

Then another voiceover he says, “Oh my God, I’ve met this girl before.” Then after a hug and chit chat, another voiceover, “I don’t think she recognized me, very surprised, because we met like three weeks ago?”

And there we have it.  He was surprised she didn't recognize him and it was downhill for them from that point on.

[gonecrackers]

7 minutes ago, seacliffsal said:

And there we have it.  He was surprised she didn't recognize him and it was downhill for them from that point on.

Odd she didn't recognize him, what with that big bush on his face, but I guess it's possible.

I don't know that he's insulted Kate didn't recognize him as much as what was said above somewhere (sorry), about him having already picked up on something he didn't like about her at their previous meeting. He was definitely disappointed right from the start.

Edited March 1, 2019 by gonecrackers

[configdotsys]

Just now, gonecrackers said:

Odd she didn't recognize him, what with that big bush on his face, but I guess it's possible.

I don't know that he's insulted Kate didn't recognize him as much as what was said above somewhere (sorry), about him picking up on something he didn't like about her. He was definitely disappointed right from the start.

Every time I see and hear her say, "Hiiieeeeee," with a girlish giggle after she gets to the altar, I just cringe. 

[Gem 10]

4 hours ago, aphroditewitch said:

I agree. I think most of A.J.'s issues are involving the production. I don't think he realized how difficult it would be to still work his normal job, fulfill his filming obligations, and also develop a relationship with Stephanie at the same time. And because he seems to be truly interested in Stephanie, it makes it even more difficult because it probably feels that the production was getting in the way of him building something with her. Dr. Jessica acting like she didn't know what he meant when he brought up the production issues as a source of frustration was so telling. A.J.'s big "crime" as far as the show is concerned is that he is having some normal reactions to what the production is like and that he is saying it out loud. I'm actually a little surprised they kept that part in because for me it makes the show look bad and not A.J.

I know, right?  I also was surprised they kept that part in.  Jessica’s unnessary talk with A.J. and Stephanie trying to put the kebash on his treatment of her made Jessica look like a fool.  She knew A.J. Was right and couldn’t get out of it.  A.J. May be loud, but he isn’t stupid.  He knows what’s going on and it frustrates him.  When he talks serious, I really like him.  Production probably makes Stephanie look afraid of him when he yells.  I think she’s the type that can take care of herself and not let anyone walk over her.  She could probably kick his ass.

[Gem 10]

1 hour ago, gonecrackers said:

Odd she didn't recognize him, what with that big bush on his face, but I guess it's possible.

I don't know that he's insulted Kate didn't recognize him as much as what was said above somewhere (sorry), about him having already picked up on something he didn't like about her at their previous meeting. He was definitely disappointed right from the start.

All he needs with that big bush is a pitchfork and two horns, and there you have the devil.

[gonecrackers]

I wasn't paying too much attention, but "Dr." Trauma's expression read: "I'm supposed to be shaming you, A.J., but my manipulative psychobabble isn't working & it's pissing me off, can't you see? Now be intimidated by my ugly stink face dammit!!"

A.J.:  Um, no. 'Blah blah I'm not the problem blah blah blah how I would improve this show blah blah production sucks blah blah blah...'

(at least that's what I heard)

Could almost see steam coming out of her ears; awesome.

[JapMo]

23 hours ago, psychoticstate said:

To me, at least, he clearly does NOT want to be in the "marriage" and has no intention of making it work.  That's a mixed message, at least IMO.  He should man up and either peace out, or really try to make it work.  But accusing Kate of having a drinking problem and going out with your buddies on your anniversary is not trying to make it work.

He's too afraid to say what he really doesn't like about her because he knows it will make him look shallow.  So instead he does an absolutely despicable thing and continues to act like she's some raging alcoholic.  That is not a man in my book.  

Let me lay out the scenario that I have in my head about what turned him off.  He sees her coming down the aisle, he's nervous and excited, and then think of what a screeching car sounds like.  That screeching car is Kate.  He recognizes her.  His heart plummets, because he remembers her, and whether they even spoke at all during the dating thing, he already had labeled her as someone totally beneath him and not worth his time.  She's blushing and giggling and introducing herself, and he's desperately trying to keep the phony smile going for the cameras, but as soon as they get outside, he makes a point to say he's seen her before.  And I remember thinking when I first saw that scene that he didn't look very happy.  I don't think it had anything to do with her not remembering him.  I just think Luke is the type that is very critical of people, and his standards for allowing anyone to be his friend, much less his wife, is very rigid and unbending.  And Kate, who maybe is more a couch potato and doesn't have a strict exercise regimen would turn him off completely.  He'd totally dismiss her as a lazy slob.  You could see his snarkiness come out on the honeymoon about the yogurt and drinking 3 cups of coffee.  Nobody else would give a sh*t about it but that REALLY BOTHERED HIM.  You drank 3 cups of coffee before 10AM?  You have no self-control.  You eat yogurt?  Disgusting...I can't even sit at the same table with you much less be called upon to hold your hand or even worse....yikes...kiss you.  He will not put out any effort to save the marriage because, let's face it....Luke thinks Kate has cooties.

[DrewPaul2010]

On 2/28/2019 at 5:05 PM, psychoticstate said:

I've developed feelings for Luke too, only they're not very nice.  Ha ha!

I think you hit the nail on the head with your second paragraph.  Luke doesn't want to look like the bad guy.  So instead of being honest with Kate, he's being passive aggressive.  He'd do much better by telling her the truth (he's not attracted to her; he likes WOC; he likes men; whatever) and suggesting that they just try to make the best of the situation until they can gracefully bow out.  I have to wonder if, by accusing her of having a drinking problem, he's hoping she will leave him, letting her be "the bad guy." 

I think whenever a situation where one spouse is clearly not being treated like a husband or wife, they should move out. If you stay in that situation more than likely you simply make it worse. I'm not saying to end the relationship but throttle back to dating since that's what its become. Luke would miss Kate more and reflect on the situation if she went home and only went out with Luke. Sometimes the bird in the bush is more desirable than the bird in the hand...

Edited March 2, 2019 by DrewPaul2010
Clarification

[Claire Voyant]

Some of the psycho-babble on this show drives me to distraction.  I have no time for the way the "experts" are handling this particular situation. 

The damage Puke is willing to inflict upon Kate is beyond contemptible.   She may be willing to take his bullshit, but that doesn't excuse the experts who stand by wringing their hands and mumbling shit about the importance of commitment. 

They need to own the fact that these two people are NOT going to work and separate them.  Then, they can work on counseling them separately and maybe help them learn to respect themselves as well as others so they don't allow that sort of thing to happen without protest, again.   This isn't rocket science.  Puke is NOT NICE.  He's NOT into her.  He is repulsed by her.  He doesn't like her.  Therefore he can be as mean as he wants in his world.  Simple as that.  Get her away from him.  And him away from her.   This is no longer funny. 

Any shrink or "spiritual" guide worth their salt wouldn't be so morally corrupt that they would allow this nonsense to go on.  Time to put the skids on this particular experiment and concentrate on ones that MIGHT work.  They're inept and bumbling and they piss me off.  All. Of. Them.  They need to go get real jobs.  I have no respect for them or their scruples.   Assholes the lot of them.  Blind leading the blind I tell ya.  Anything for a buck. 

Edited March 2, 2019 by Claire Voyant
clarity

[Yeah No]

On 3/1/2019 at 7:49 PM, JapMo said:

Let me lay out the scenario that I have in my head about what turned him off.  He sees her coming down the aisle, he's nervous and excited, and then think of what a screeching car sounds like.  That screeching car is Kate.  He recognizes her.  His heart plummets, because he remembers her, and whether they even spoke at all during the dating thing, he already had labeled her as someone totally beneath him and not worth his time.  

I don't think it had anything to do with her not remembering him.  

I'm with you on this.  I think Luke had already mentally 'swiped left' when he saw Kate at the speed dating event so he was not going to give her a chance at all.  We have already discussed that she didn't fit in with or flatter his shallow faux-hipster self image and that's why he doesn't like her.  As to all the theories attempting to justify his dislike of her by wondering if she smells, doesn't bathe, etc. - That's just giving into Luke's deflecting smoke screen.  He WANTS you to think that.  Even if he later comes out with big crocodile tears and says, "Honestly, I didn't want to hurt her but she smells and doesn't bathe", would anyone seriously BELIEVE him???  He has already shown himself to be willing to exaggerate Kate's drinking to make her look bad in order to justify not being into her so why wouldn't he continue to do that with other similarly made-up things?

Edited March 3, 2019 by Yeah No

[Koalagirl]

I have an awful feeling in my gut that Luke is going to tell Kate he doesn't want a divorce (as seen in the previews) and then on decision day after she says she doesn't want a divorce he is going to be a total s*#t and will humiliate her by saying he wants one.  I wouldn't put that past him.

[qtpye]

5 hours ago, Koalagirl said:

I have an awful feeling in my gut that Luke is going to tell Kate he doesn't want a divorce (as seen in the previews) and then on decision day after she says she doesn't want a divorce he is going to be a total s*#t and will humiliate her by saying he wants one.  I wouldn't put that past him.

I can totally see him crying fake tears and saying " I did everything I could to make this marriage work but Kate's lack of hygiene, heavy drinking, and ignorance of sloth knowledge made it impossible...I care about her too much."

[Elizzikra]

Quote

I can totally see him crying fake tears and saying " I did everything I could to make this marriage work but Kate's lack of hygiene, heavy drinking, and ignorance of sloth knowledge made it impossible...I care about her too much."

I can totally see him gaslighting the hell out of this situation - pretending to take the blame while really laying it on Kate. "I'm sorry this was so hard for Kate that she had to drink so much to get through it. If only I'd been strong enough to be able to kiss a wife who tastes like an ashtray and smells like a dumpster fire. I care about her so much but all she ever really wanted to do was wipe down the counters while I was out having fun with my great friends I tried to introduce into her shy and lonely life."

[psychoticstate]

20 hours ago, Koalagirl said:

I have an awful feeling in my gut that Luke is going to tell Kate he doesn't want a divorce (as seen in the previews) and then on decision day after she says she doesn't want a divorce he is going to be a total s*#t and will humiliate her by saying he wants one.  I wouldn't put that past him.

If the "experts" let that happen, they should all be taken out behind the barn and shot.  

[Koalagirl]

24 minutes ago, psychoticstate said:

If the "experts" let that happen, they should all be taken out behind the barn and shot.  

The upside of that is that we get all new experts.

[Retired at last]

I think, if the 3 month thing is real, they will agree to staying married at decision day and then come back for the reunion show in 90 days and then call it quits. If there is more $$$ and if they can spend those 90 days apart, I think they will do that. But, the review for tonight did show Kate at least mentioning getting a divorce, but then showed Puke saying he didn't want to do that.

[qtpye]

1 hour ago, Retired at last said:

I think, if the 3 month thing is real, they will agree to staying married at decision day and then come back for the reunion show in 90 days and then call it quits. If there is more $$$ and if they can spend those 90 days apart, I think they will do that. But, the review for tonight did show Kate at least mentioning getting a divorce, but then showed Puke saying he didn't want to do that.

Puke needs the money badly. I think they can get out of the marriage but will get a big financial penalty on their contract. He wants that 20k that they are rumored to pay on this show. I also think they get a hefty bonus after decision day if they stay married for the allotted time period. That is the only reason he has not walked. Unfortunately, his passive aggressive ass has to make up shit about Kate in order to make the failure of the marriage her fault.

[Mazzy]

On 3/1/2019 at 7:49 PM, JapMo said:

He's too afraid to say what he really doesn't like about her because he knows it will make him look shallow.  So instead he does an absolutely despicable thing and continues to act like she's some raging alcoholic. 

Is it despicable that he accuses Kate of nonsensical things like alcoholism, but I also think this idea that he MUST give an explicit grocery list accounting of what he doesn't like about Kate is not okay either. He doesn't owe the viewers or the producers or Kate that. He told her and tells her he isn't into her. It had to be forced out of him but whether he's a "man" about it or not doesn't really matter when the bottom line remains: honey, he's just not that into you. No one needs to be told more than that. If someone doesn't want to be with someone else they are allowed that. Most times the one being left doesn't get ALL the answers they want about why the other person wasn't as into them as they were into the other person.

I read comments about these supposed nice things he does off camera because Kate says so but then we have to go down the conspiracy hole again with the idea that Luke has some super hero power to prevent filming of these events for some benefit to himself that comes from looking like a total ass to all of America ?? I think a much more plausible idea is that the woman who has a man openly telling her he isn't into her while said woman takes every half smile as the real life interpretation of the line in Dumb and Dumber: "so you're saying there's a chance!"; could be reading more into things than is real and the real reason we don't see these lovey moments from Luke is because they don't exist outside Kate's mind.