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Paradise Hotel (US)

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14 hours ago, Peper81 said:

When does this show air?

The premiere date hasn't been set yet.  I'd guess summer or fall.

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1 hour ago, OnceSane said:

The premiere date hasn't been set yet.  I'd guess summer or fall.

Thank you!

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May 9!!!! Just saw first ad for it ... 

Game on! How much of the old gang is still here (under new or old names)? Whatever happened to Periwinkle (I think that was the forumite who sent roses to Charla, no???)

I vow to behave, Once Sane! 

(That said, if they ever bring Toddlers and Tiaras back to air, I can't promise the same). 

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Ok. I know I am going  to come off as the biggest uptight bitch...but I feel the need to say it and ask a few questions to possibly change/justify my feelings.

My grandmother lived with us, and as a child my job was to sit in the beanbag chair and physically change the tv channels among the 3 networks and PBS that was available to our home of 1970's kentucky ( once heard a comic say before remote controls u had kids to turn it). She would tell to turn that channe with  nothing but smut and sex whenever 3's company, Soap, etc. Would come on. I found it funny however that you never Dared disturb her when DALLAS was on.

Well now in my 50's I see the commercials for this show and they say in the ads "hook up or check out" and "time to see who sleeps with who".

I hear my grandmas voice in my head and dont like it, but are these people really going on tv to get money to sleep with strangers.  Between the bachelor/bachelorette where they meet the parents who seem to be saying  "sure hope you fuck my daughter tonight".  

Now I dont protest these shows, write letters and I dont watch them..I turn the channel, and I dont stop others, it its just I have a tough time talking with my niece about respect,  caring and developing a relationship before sex   ( i dont preach abstinence...just safe sex and BC and worrying about her getting hurt, dating for more than 2 hours sex)  when these folks are fucking around with strangers for money.   Is that what this show is doing? Like I said I know I sound like a bitch, just want to know if that is what this show truly is.

I guess if I may add 1 more thing. For years 2 of my best friends who are gay and 3 family members who were gay were constantly bombarded with shit about how people did not want them to flaunt their lifestyle and how them being allowed to marry would cheapen/denigrate straight couples.......wtf do they think this shit does........those bigots were looking in the wrong place.

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Episode 1:

Quote

Kristin Cavallari hosts the unscripted dating competition series in which sexy singles try to remain in paradise for as long as possible by pairing up. Immersed in a gorgeous setting, these strangers will be surrounded by sun, fun, flirtation and romance—all cloaked in a wild competition.

Airs May 9, 2019.

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Better than I thought it would be.  I loved the original and I'm not typically a fan of reboots but I found myself entertained. 

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I was very upset with Carlos. First of all, Deondra was my favorite and she's gone week 1???? Hopefully theres a twist that can bring her back. Then, I felt bad that it was D vs Mari because they were actually becoming "friends" and would have probably been a whole hoot to watch together. I would never trust Carlos after the shit he pulled. 

Idk WHY Mari would pick a man named Bobby Ray to go out on a date with. He's obviously team white girl to the max.  

Letting the guys pick the new guy was a total disappointment. I was looking forward to one of the other two serving as eye candy. 

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9 hours ago, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

Letting the guys pick the new guy was a total disappointment. I was looking forward to one of the other two serving as eye candy. 

I'll be interested to see how this plays out (and we'll still get one of the eye candy guys on Monday) ... I mean, OBVIOUSLY the guys chose "Big Red Kyle" because he was, in their eyes, no competition. So next episode, I wonder if the group picking will instead "nominate" the one they LEAST want and that's the one they get?

Am I clear as mud on that?

I was ready to bail after the first 45 minutes or so but decided to stick with it and for now I'm in but not, you know, ALLLLL in. 

How much of this is live-live and how much is fake-live? Did they do the live thing in the original? And I guess the "live" thing is why this is apparently on 4 times a week. And how annoying is Kristen Cavalleri? 

Was there as much botox/fake boobs//plastic surgery in the original? One of the interchangeable girls with long dark hair is gonna knock someone's eye out with those boobs. Also, I think it was really mean of the ladies to not tell Mariaelena that she forgot to put on pants for the final ceremony. 

I believe that's all for now. I'm not rooting for anybody. They're all kind of awful. Deiondra showed a lot of class in her exit, though ... I could have grown to like her. She reminds me of someone else on reality TV that I can't put my finger on. And thankfully for her, she apparently looks like her mom. (No knock on Neon, who I always enjoyed watching, but not a really handsome guy). 

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36 minutes ago, PamelaMaeSnap said:

I'll be interested to see how this plays out (and we'll still get one of the eye candy guys on Monday) ... I mean, OBVIOUSLY the guys chose "Big Red Kyle" because he was, in their eyes, no competition. So next episode, I wonder if the group picking will instead "nominate" the one they LEAST want and that's the one they get?

Am I clear as mud on that?

I was ready to bail after the first 45 minutes or so but decided to stick with it and for now I'm in but not, you know, ALLLLL in. 

How much of this is live-live and how much is fake-live? Did they do the live thing in the original? And I guess the "live" thing is why this is apparently on 4 times a week. And how annoying is Kristen Cavalleri? 

Was there as much botox/fake boobs//plastic surgery in the original? One of the interchangeable girls with long dark hair is gonna knock someone's eye out with those boobs. Also, I think it was really mean of the ladies to not tell Mariaelena that she forgot to put on pants for the final ceremony. 

I believe that's all for now. I'm not rooting for anybody. They're all kind of awful. Deiondra showed a lot of class in her exit, though ... I could have grown to like her. She reminds me of someone else on reality TV that I can't put my finger on. And thankfully for her, she apparently looks like her mom. (No knock on Neon, who I always enjoyed watching, but not a really handsome guy). 

Wow I didn't know it was on 4xs a week! I just set my DVR assuming it was once a week. I also missed the part about one of tb3e other guys coming Monday.

I don't remember some stuff with the original but I don't think there was a live element.

I sense some real superiority complex vibes from some of the others toward Mari

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9 hours ago, PamelaMaeSnap said:

And how annoying is Kristen Cavalleri?

I think she'll settle in... however the ott British accent guy that does the narrating is going to drive me insane. It's like a bad imitation of Robin Leach or something. Who thought 'lets get a guy with an outrageous accent do all the talking parts in the show' was a good idea?

A decent reboot I think, jury still out though. I'll give it a fair chance but 4 days a week?? Really? Yikes.

19 hours ago, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

Idk WHY Mari would pick a man named Bobby Ray to go out on a date with. He's obviously team white girl to the max.  

Exactly! "Let's see I have my pick so I'll go with the whitest guy available." What? She was really annoying with her continual whining about people 'not being open'.

I am getting these weird Dawson's Creek flashbacks from the Hans and Brittany pairing and I never even watched Dawson...

Are Kendal and Rosanna the same person?

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On 5/11/2019 at 2:34 AM, Wandering Snark said:

Are Kendal and Rosanna the same person?

Yes. Yes she is.

Bobby Ray referred to himself by name. I think that should be a penalty.

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Was channel surfing the other night and came across this one. I'll probably watch a few more episodes but the casting seems off to me. Bring back psycho Toni !

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14 hours ago, Thomas Crown said:

Bring back psycho Toni !

YAHTZEE!!! 😆

Anyhow, one good thing about this show is that the we're not stuck with the initial casting as p-ho's come and go.

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But who will be the first to say "Game on!" all aggressively?

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The Toni versus Dave feud was epic. I still think that the original cast of Paradise Hotel was one of the best casts in reality TV ever and made for some great entertainment that summer.  Who knows, maybe this cast will surprise us. 

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Hans has some serious issues at play. But even so sobbing on your date's shoulder about said issues so early on just flashes 'RUN!' in neon burnt across your date's mind, no matter how much she attempts to comfort you at the time.

"That could have ended my life..." is possibly the most ott thing I've heard on one of these shows, and damn that's a long list. And yeah, it had nothing to do with you being outrageously drunk at the time you sat on said chair, right?

And, I can't believe they actually are daring to put this show up against the Bachelorette. It makes me wonder what kind of footing the show is on and if it might get dumped early on so they don't care what timeslot they put it on.

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At the very least these boneheads should've read up on the original.  Of course they're not going to let you gang up and vote out every new person.  The look of despair on Bill Ray's face as Kristin shared the rules was the highlight of my evening.  

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Tatum really thinks highly of herself.  I was turned off by how sure of herself she was that she could make any guy want her.  

I laughed at drunk girl falling over on her chair and blaming others.  I don't know how that could be anyone's fault but her own.  Then she goes rushing back to her room to look for sympathy that she didn't get.  

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Y'all, I was HOWLING at Mari's "I could have died" reaction. Girl, you were drunk and fell on your ass. No need for tears, you alright. 

Hans is one red flag after another, huh? Hot damn. Run, Brittany. She seems like a nice enough girl.

I admittedly have a soft spot for a redhead, but I like Kyle.

Bobby Ray is exhausting. 

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Ok I'm bored but those margaritas look mmm mmm goood 😋

It's too soon for this level of drama. Brittany is always on the verge of tears and then her "cup of tea" is in breakdown mode. How long have they been there, 2 days??

Since D left the girls are kinda meh for me. I can't remember half their names. The one girl looks like Anna Farris with dark hair which might be cute. 

I knew his name was pronounced Jah-Ear and not Jair like chair. That was bugging the hell out of me. 

Also too soon to be so possessive and clingy but I guess that's the idea. Bobby Ray is over there shitting bricks. I remember some of the "couples" on the original moving at lightning speed, sooo

Mari could have broken her neck, guys! 

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23 minutes ago, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

Mari could have broken her neck, guys! 

I loved that she said she had to 'check her neck', apparently in the mirror... to see if one of her vertebrae was sticking out maybe?? That chair placement could have ended her life!!!

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You guys! I am in heaven.  I thought at first "No way can this reboot even touch the original Paradizzle -- maybe the best reality show this world has ever seen" 

But you guys -- they might! This cast has some CRAZ-ZEE people.  Hans has a suitcase full of issues that his GF really thinks she can solve.  Spoiler alert - you can't! He will turn on you in a second.  Wait.... yep, there he goes! Because she ... laughed? At something he said? 

The spin the bottle game was hilarious. I don't remember the girl's name who let Hans kiss her after her boyfriend went to the bathroom but I loved seeing her just do what she wanted to do even knowing it would be an issue.  She literally kissed almost everyone. 

Bobby Ray is going to lose his shit this week and I am loving every second of it.  Not a fan of Big Red.  Boy cannot read a room!!!!

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18 hours ago, Wandering Snark said:

I loved that she said she had to 'check her neck', apparently in the mirror... to see if one of her vertebrae was sticking out maybe?? That chair placement could have ended her life!!!

It was made even more hilarious by Carlos's refusal to do anything but return to his nap.

How does Tatum see through those humongous fake lashes? Also Tatum, honey, you're not as good looking as you think you are.

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On 5/13/2019 at 5:57 PM, Thomas Crown said:

The Toni versus Dave feud was epic. I still think that the original cast of Paradise Hotel was one of the best casts in reality TV ever and made for some great entertainment that summer.  Who knows, maybe this cast will surprise us. 

The only thing more epic than watching that season was following the thread on TWoP (apologies to Glark, Sars, Miss Alli and company who had to rein a few folks in). Who can forget Periwinkle's sending roses to Charla. That thread and those from the Bachelor/ette and Showbiz Moms and Dads kept our mods very very busy. And, on my end at least, created more than one cleanup on aisle desk-chair. (I believe I STILL have Glark's "phone call of doom" transcript saved). 

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On 5/10/2019 at 10:13 AM, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

I was very upset with Carlos.

What's going on with his hairline??

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22 hours ago, mertensia said:

How does Tatum see through those humongous fake lashes? Also Tatum, honey, you're not as good looking as you think you are.

The nose and mouth area are too scary/plastic for me.

I guess I'm getting old, because this cast feels just so so so young to me.  Although Jair, and the other guy that was rejected by the men, are cute.  

The cast of Temptation Island felt much more okay to me.  

Edited by Ms Blue Jay
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2 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

What's going on with his hairline??

I couldn't tell you 😂

I agree with you on the Tatum thing though. Her face has been shot up more times than Ye Old Saloon during the gold rush

ETA I feel like I should rewatch the original season! If anybody finds it please share. I don't remember a whole lot of details but I do know I love love loved it and that Charla was a "bad bitch"

Edited by SlutAssBitchAssHor
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Is there voting tonight ? I am watching the big bang theory finale, but did not know if there was a rush to watch tonight's Paradise hotel because of voting? If there is voting when does it close?

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Voting closes 10:30 Pacific.

I'd never heard someone say their head was crumbles before... poor poor Brittany.

I was sad to see the 'checkout' fizzle out.

I have just one thing to say to the P-Ho's: Wear. Sunscreen. Believe me on this.

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Oh, Brittany. Blotchy white face powder when the rest of you is tanning is a bad look.

The guys seemed so unimpressed by the new gals. Like "dude, can we just...refuse them?" unimpressed .

I want to bitchslap Carlos for his calling himself Papi all the time. Just no.

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Really wish Jair would've picked Marielena, if only to send Papi home.  Hans had his issues but Papi's a straight manipulative dick. Short & ugly too.

Not too bothered by any of the couples but Brittany is so damn annoying. Please let this be her last week.

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I wanted Jair to break up one of the main couples.  Instead we got the predictable elimination.  I would have preferred Hans stick around to cause trouble.  At least he ruffled some feathers which is more fun for me.  

I hope the ex girlfriend showing up causes some trouble.  I am all for the shake ups.  

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5 hours ago, snarts said:

Hans had his issues but Papi's a straight manipulative dick. Short & ugly too.

The first thing I said to myself when I saw all the men lined up was "Oh, well that explains a LOT of Carlos' issues!" He was so easy to pick out of that lineup because dude is super short. I loved all the times the editors busted him when he was saying "I never said that!" and then they would SHOW him saying exactly that!

If wanted Kyle to pick either Tatum or Rosanna as a roomie and then Jair to pick the other at the 'ceremony'. Now THAT would have been must see teevee!

I love how 'the four' sit at their own table about 100yds away from everyone else and talk about 'Oh we shouldn't be doing this' and 'Yeah this looks bad' but then they didn't actually DO anything about it!!

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I was looking up the cast and Brittany has had some rough things happen. As far as I know, I haven't heard about it yet.

Spoiler

Apparently, her fiancee died in an accident before they were married. Before that, she got into an accident where she was almost paralyzed (not the fake falling over a chair kind.

Other cast members have some fake professions like model and "bottle service girl" (Tatum).

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What a fantastically trashy show!

No tea, no shade but week 1 had to have been the result of producer shenanigans, because marielena is a dead ringer for John leguizamo's character in Too Wong Fu.  

Also, her teeth are way yellow which can happen when someone is bulemic. 

However, no matter why her teeth are the color of peeps, she was no more attractive than deiondra, who I really liked.  But, she was probably too down to earth and drama free for this type of show. 

She needed to be like 5x thirstier and attention seeking. 

Surprisingly, Bobby Ray is one of my favorites.  Yes, he is clearly team white girl, but since the only black girl was unceremoniously shown the door in favor of a drag queen with yellow teeth I know what this show is about.  But, Bobby Ray seems pretty loyal and down to earth.  In spite of the fact that he refers to himself in the third person .

I also kinda like David.  I once dated a guy who had a smile like that, so I think that could be part of it.

I could really do without Kristen cavalleri, but the host doesn't matter I suppose....voice over guy is hilarious.

**on another note, is Carlos wearing jeggings?  WTF?

***Also, where did they get this ugly ass ginger?  He looks kinda homeless.  There are attractive gingers out there.. why this guy?

Edited by RealReality
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On 5/14/2019 at 8:42 PM, Wandering Snark said:

I loved that she said she had to 'check her neck', apparently in the mirror... to see if one of her vertebrae was sticking out maybe?? That chair placement could have ended her life!!!

I'm over the top amused at the multiple shots of the couple's vying for mirror space in the room.  I guess this is what happens when 10 Instagram models try to find love on television .  Narcissus in the modern world.  

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On 5/15/2019 at 2:50 PM, mertensia said:

It was made even more hilarious by Carlos's refusal to do anything but return to his nap.

How does Tatum see through those humongous fake lashes? Also Tatum, honey, you're not as good looking as you think you are.

This entire season could be sponsored by fake lashes, clip on hair extensions, fake boobies, steroids, Forever 21 and "Bros"

Fantastic!

Edited by RealReality
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But was the chair thing REALLY an accident?  I'm with you Jon leguizamo, this is all very suspicious and I suspect foul play.

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On 5/16/2019 at 8:56 PM, Wandering Snark said:

Voting closes 10:30 Pacific.

I'd never heard someone say their head was crumbles before... poor poor Brittany.

I was sad to see the 'checkout' fizzle out.

I have just one thing to say to the P-Ho's: Wear. Sunscreen. Believe me on this.

I feel like the heavy makeup must deflect some of the uv rays?  Maybe?  I'm surprised Tatum is able to see anything.

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O no girl, you are not going to meet his parents....stop asking him about it!  Second hand cringe!

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Oh Kendall...oh honey, he picked up a phone and pretended to order a cake and a pinata.  

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