S23.E02: Week 2

[saber5055]

1 minute ago, dizzyd said:

She's Miss Alabama Crimson Tide. She needs to go down!

Thanks. That explains the "I have to be perfect" thing.

Okay, someone needs to count all the times any word containing "virgin" is used. Surely someone is keeping a running total somewhere?

[Mu Shu]

Ah crap, I was hoping Hannah would be left to wander the desert for forty years.

[MBJ]

14 minutes ago, saber5055 said:

Okay, someone needs to count all the times any word containing "virgin" is used. Surely someone is keeping a running total somewhere?

Please don't start drinking for the number of times that Hannah says "Birthday". 

[JenE4]

Oh. My. God. I can’t handle how mind-numbing these first few hours of this season have been. Can we fast forward to the fence jump already?! 

Mu Shu, tell us more about your eggplant. Is it cool enough to eat yet?

[GracieK]

5 minutes ago, tennisgurl said:

Christ, I heard less about virginity when I was in Catholic school!

No shit! I think even Sister Mary Pat would tell Colton to give it a rest at this point. 

[dizzyd]

Oh how I missed you, JenE4!

[ECM1231]

10 minutes ago, Mu Shu said:

Miss Carolina or miss Dakota, I think.

Alabama. Miss NC Caelynn is her nemesis.

[Mu Shu]

“I’m serving theshuttlecock”. Man this innuendo is even making a hobag like me feel squicky. 

[RedheadZombie]

52 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Did these women really say "drownding in bitches"?  Like with a D in the middle of drowning?

I definitely heard that moron Catherine pronounce it that way.

[Armchair Critic]

I assume they picked pageant girls for him because they are less sexually experienced (or will act like they are)

[tennisgurl]

This episode is just making me want to watch Parks and Rec.

[SallyAlbright]

I cannot believe how many of these 23-year-olds have massive fake lips. It's so distracting and doesn't make a single one of them look better. Society is scary. 

[JenE4]

Virginity. First kisses. Summer camp. This is like 7th grade. Red rover, red rover, send everyone home and re-cast the season!

[tennisgurl]

Colton runs off with Billy, and it becomes the greatest moment of television, ever. 

[saber5055]

OMG, Colton just got called "the first gay bachelor!"

[dizzyd]

Omg, Eichner said it for us all!

[Gem 10]

Does Hanna’s face hurt?  She is constantly smiling.  Maybe because it’s her Birthday?

[MBJ]

12 minutes ago, tennisgurl said:

Colton runs off with Billy, and it becomes the greatest moment of television, ever. 

Billy is so handsome and funny.  He's a dreamboat!

[JenE4]

“I wanted a guest spot on ‘The Goldbergs’ and I got this.” Haha!

[Mu Shu]

I’m sick of all the virgin talk.  Already.  I’m ready to jump a fence like a big gazelle.

colton just gives me little brother vibes.

and my mouth got burned because I have no self control .  I love eggplant 🍆. 

Edited January 15, 2019 by Mu Shu

[saber5055]

Red team gets to stay and sleep out under the stars, outside! Yellow team has to return to a mansion for the night.

Okay, so WHICH team is the real winner?

2 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

“I wanted a guest spot on ‘The Goldbergs’ and I got this.” Haha!

LOL, a commercial for "The Goldbergs" just played.

[Armchair Critic]

1 minute ago, Mu Shu said:

colton just gives me little brother vibes

I've been dragging him on here but actually he doesn't come off like a jerk like some of the past Bachelors, probably is a nice guy. But he just has no sex appeal, you are right that he gives off little brother vibes.

[tennisgurl]

Eichner speaks for all of us!

"I wanted a guest spot on The Goldbergs, and instead I got this!"

[ECM1231]

5 minutes ago, tennisgurl said:

Colton runs off with Billy, and it becomes the greatest moment of television, ever. 

I'd have been more inclined last week to believe this but tonight for the 1st time Colton said his virginity was b/c of his religious upbringing. He had never actually said that before. He was raised to wait until marriage but now he told Hannah he will wait until he falls in love.

[tennisgurl]

1 minute ago, Armchair Critic said:

I've been dragging him on here but actually he doesn't come off like a jerk like some of the past Bachelors, probably is a nice guy. But he just has no sex appeal, you are right that he gives off little brother vibes.

Colton seems like a nice dude who I would hang out with in high school and we would make paper airplanes and throw them at each other and he would notice when I got a haircut, but I had less than zero romantic interest in. 

[Mu Shu]

If you painted Catherine blue, she could be in avatar. 

[RedheadZombie]

50 minutes ago, nutty1 said:

Elyse is a breath of fresh air, with her red hair that isn’t straight and parted in the middle. 

Demi’s laugh....OMG!!

You'd think that horrendous braying would be an automatic deal breaker.  I have a feeling she'll be talking about her platinum vagine any time now.

[Sepalma23]

The Tracy chick on the group date resembles Lady Gaga

[Armchair Critic]

Her first kiss on television, no pressure there for Colton

[saber5055]

2 minutes ago, ECM1231 said:

but tonight for the 1st time Colton said his virginity was b/c of his religious upbringing.

This show avoids religion and politics at all costs. Some contestants we've liked in the past might have been sent home  based on those differences, we just never get to hear about it.

[Mu Shu]

1 minute ago, Sepalma23 said:

The Tracy chick on the group date resembles Lady Gaga

God, I thought she looked fresh and natural.  No, my eyes are bad.  She’s pretty botoxed up.

[tennisgurl]

So...is Catherine's dog ok? Is Chris taking good care of him?

[JenE4]

Wait a minute. These two pagent girls look exactly alike with their little pug noses. How am I supposed to keep track of which one the “bad” one is? Both?

[Armchair Critic]

19 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Oh. My. God. I can’t handle how mind-numbing these first few hours of this season have been. Can we fast forward to the fence jump already?!

I've been entertaining myself by reading comments on the story about Trump feeding fast food to the visiting football players. Regardless of your political affiliation it is some funny stuff.

[scenicbyway]

Colton is a virgin!!

Ugh

Now one of the beautiful girls has never been kissed?!

Give me a break.  He’s a virgin by choice not accident.

 

Are any of these women smart?  Is Colton?

[Mu Shu]

2 minutes ago, tennisgurl said:

So...is Catherine's dog ok? Is Chris taking good care of him?

Probably not even her dog.

i think Colton would be fun to play board games and get pizza with.  

Was the super bowl yesterday?  

Edited January 15, 2019 by Mu Shu

[RedheadZombie]

I really like Elyse, but her voice is giving me Sam from Big Brother flashbacks.

[saber5055]

3 minutes ago, Armchair Critic said:

I've been entertaining myself by reading comments on the story about Trump feeding fast food to the visiting football players. Regardless of your political affiliation it is some funny stuff.

Heading out to google that story. I could use some entertainment since TB isn't doing it for me.

[Mu Shu]

Ooh, Demi is firing shots at Ye Olde Hags.  Bunch of spinsters!

[Meowwww]

OMG he is sooooooooooo boring.  

[tennisgurl]

I know that Colton must be cool with all of this, but it must suck that the only semi interesting thing the show can say about him is "he hasn't stuck his dick into anyone".

[dizzyd]

Oh for fucks sakes, I feel like I'm watching Big Brother now!

[JenE4]

Someone’s been a parent long enough to have a 23 year old AND a 2-year-old? Dear lord, I thought my 12-year difference between my oldest and youngest was a mistake to be a mom for 30 years, can you imagine having a “nestful” parenting for 40 years?!? I love my kids, but oh, hell no!

[Mu Shu]

1 minute ago, tennisgurl said:

I know that Colton must be cool with all of this, but it must suck that the only semi interesting thing the show can say about him is "he hasn't stuck his dick into anyone".

He’s surprisingly graceful for a big guy.  So there’s that.  And he would probably change your tire.. .and do an airport drop off and pick up.  I’m trying. 

[MBJ]

38 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Oh. My. God. I can’t handle how mind-numbing these first few hours of this season have been. Can we fast forward to the fence jump already?! 

[ECM1231]

2 minutes ago, Meowwww said:

OMG he is sooooooooooo boring.  

Really, truly. And exudes a big fat 0 sex appeal imho. Gonna be a lonnnggg season!

[Meowwww]

1 minute ago, ECM1231 said:

Really, truly. And exudes a big fat 0 sex appeal imho. Gonna be a lonnnggg season!

Like a grinning cherub of a not-so-bright younger brother.  

[saber5055]

If his eyelashes keep falling out at this rate, they'll be gone by season's end.

I have absolutely no interest in anyone in this season so far, including Colton. That's a first for me.

[Armchair Critic]

LOL that girl is ready to straddle him and Colton is burying his face in the pillow

[tennisgurl]

Colton needs a grown up. Demi is next level crazy eyes. Cougar attacks? Lady, they are like 30 years old!

This dude is gonna run out of eyelashes.