S11.E01: Social Media Food Failures

[Drogo]

The celebrities must make a dish inspired by food they've posted on their social media profiles; the mentors teach the celebrities how to make some lobster dishes, which proves to be disastrous for some of these clueless cooks.

[HunterHunted]

Facial fillers are terrible. Carmen Electra, Vivica, and Carson's faces looked a mess. Too many fillers. 

As for the food, I really expected the woman from Baby Daddy and the Bachelor to be better cooks.

[meowmommy]

I was stunned and amazed to find I knew who more than half these people are.  Usually they're all a complete mystery to me.  Never heard of the bachelor or Minnesota babe.  Wish, however, Carson hadn't been even more OTT than usual.

Also amazed that FN let them say tater tots.  When they use tater tots on Chopped they cover it up with some damn euphemism like reprocessed potato balls or some shit like that.

I hate lobster so it's really easy for me to be grossed out every time they execute a live one. 

Why did they pretend there would be an elimination when they started with eight instead of nine?

[Bastet]

My objection to this show is that it's populated by people faking their cooking skills and tossing out sound bites in the hopes of launching some sort of entertainment career, so I figure that watching professional entertainers who might actually be amusing would be better.  And, this time, I know who all but one of these people are, which is rare (it's Sean Lowe I had no idea who he was, and Perez Hilton I only know by name, but I know - basically - what he does).  And I even like some of them - Nora Dunn speaks her mind, Melissa Peterman was hilarious on Reba, Carson Kressley was good on Queer Eye, etc.  I still forgot it was on until nearly 20 minutes into the late airing, so I missed a good portion, but I watched.

They really weren't much funnier than the wannabes (which may be why they're on a fourth-rate show like this, I know).  And this version of the show seems to suck as much as the regular version.  Yet, somehow, I can see myself watching on nights I happen across it while going around the dial when nothing else is on, which is higher praise than I can give the regular version (where I only watch the final episode, in order to see the food once they've admitted they can cook).

It's such an amateur cooking show cliché to stick them with live lobster, and I think it's tacky at best to act like people are ridiculous for not knowing how to go about dealing with that, plus you set up a situation in which inexperienced cooks are going to torture those poor animals.

And the faux drama over someone being eliminated with an even number of contestants was also annoying.

In the first 20 minutes I missed, did we learn what charities they're each playing for, or are they saving that for the next episode (which would be further evidence of the stupidity of pretending someone was going to go home)?

[biakbiak]

I had never heard of Melissa and I found her so painfully unfunny and annoying that I was upset she did well on the challenge because I want her gone ASAP.

I think I am going to have to get mofungo soon to block out Paunch's travesty.

[CrazyDog]

I actually enjoyed this.  Carson was over the top, but I have loved him since his Queer Eye days, so I don't care. I laughed at his "lamb lollipops and a giant carrot" and his calling Ted Allen. LOL.

Go Ponch. The only one I really don't care for is Sean Lowe, but he was mostly tolerable here.

Edited August 24, 2017 by CrazyDog

[seacliffsal]

I couldn't believe it-I knew who everyone was, which is really rare for me with 'celebrity' versions of shows.  Not necessarily a fan of them all, nor have I watched the shows that several were on (Baywatch?  Never.  CHIPS?  Never.).  So, a real step up from earlier versions in my opinion.

And, I did laugh out loud at times.  I liked Melissa on Reba and laughed as several of her comments.  She just makes me smile (yes, I have a cheesy sense of humor).  Carson?  Love.  Nora seems awkward and I thought her attempts at humor fell flat.

Excited for this season and I will be enjoying it.

[Brookside]

Rachael Ray certainly butchered (pun intended) her lobster.

Is it just me or does Pérez Hilton look like Herman Munster?

[Snarklepuss]

On 8/24/2017 at 6:57 PM, Brookside said:

Is it just me or does Pérez Hilton look like Herman Munster?

No he does, I thought it too, LOL.

I don't know why I bother to watch this.  It's so bad even the regular version is better!  I know most of these people but that doesn't make it any better.  Eric Estrada hasn't aged well and as much as I loved Carson Kressley on other shows (like on DWTS) he is overacting even more and therefore more annoying here.  Plus him saying he doesn't know how to cook when he won "Cupcake Wars" is still bugging me.

[Drogo]

I thought Melissa was adorable and still recognized her from her 2 minute role in original recipe Fargo.

 

Go, Bears.  

[Drogo]

Yah! 

[MajorWoody]

I remembered the Hooker #2 role from Fargo, but not the actual actress.

No clue who the bachelor dude is, the over the top gay guy (who if a producer asked a gay guy to act like that would be accused of perpetuating a stereotype), the celebrity blogger (have heard the name, but never paid any attention to him), and the other lady. Know of Ponch, from his show forty years ago, and his subsequent commercial almost twenty years ago pushing some shitty real estate in Florida.

Know Carmen Electra as the skank who briefly married the sleazy Dennis Rodman, and who knows what diseases she picked up from him.

And finally, Nora Dunn, the unfunny comedienne who thought SNL should not allow a controversial comedian ((Dice Clay) because he did not appeal to her progressive censorship positions. Apparently her cooking skills are on par with her comedy chops. She is a jerk, and I hope she gets cut swiftly, and returns to whatever black hole her career has descended into. 

[JunebugTx]

Um, Carson needs to go.  I never watched Queer Eye, but I can't stand how he's acting on this show.  I love Erik Estrada (back from his CHiPs days), but I'm afraid he's going to be the first to go.  I liked Melissa, too.

Maybe it's time to stop trying to watch this one.

[Snarklepuss]

I take back what I said about Erik not ageing well.  I didn't realize he was 68 years old.  I thought he was several years younger.  From what I've read about him, he supports and does work for a fair amount of charities/community causes.  He has also at various times actually been sworn into police departments in different states as a reserve officer or sheriff to work on various task forces.  He's also a native New Yorker (born in Brooklyn). Interesting guy, so why is he on this train wreck?

[notcreative enough]

On 8/26/2017 at 1:50 AM, Snarklepuss said:

No he does, I thought it too, LOL.

I don't know why I bother to watch this.  It's so bad even the regular version is better!  I know most of these people but that doesn't make it any better.  Eric Estrada hasn't aged well and as much as I loved Carson Kressley on other shows (like on DWTS) he is overacting even more and therefore more annoying here.  Plus him saying he doesn't know how to cook when he won "Cupcake Wars" is still bugging me.

I totally forgot he was on cupcake wars. I don't remember how well he did but you need to know how to make cupcakes to be on the show. Maybe they are hoping that people won't remember. I sure didn't. And I don't want to hear about someone can bake but not cook. You sure as hell can do basic cook.

[mlp]

I'm thinking that Carson was on Cake Wars, not Cupcake Wars, but I could be wrong.  Either way, he must have some knowledge of the basics especially after many seasons of Queer Eye with Ted Allen.  He's always OTT but he has it dialed up to Max for this show.  I like him and get a kick out of him anyway.

[spiderpig]

Grumpy McGrumpster reporting for duty...

Eight brave lobsters gave their lives for this idiotic show.  (I'm not counting Ann's and Rachael's.)

I hated watching adults over 40 running around like the Three Stooges, and expected them to poke each others' eyes out with a barbecue fork.  The show's direction and musical scoring were ridiculous.

Is Carmen Electra that short, or are the rest of them professional basketball players?

Nora Dunn's charity is an animal shelter, so at this point I'm supporting her.

[Amarsir]

13 minutes ago, spiderpig said:

I hated watching adults over 40 running around like the Three Stooges, and expected them to poke each others' eyes out with a barbecue fork.  The show's direction and musical scoring were ridiculous.

And the special effects, and the forced hashtag puns... Sigh. I'm trying to psych myself up into a silly mood which is what they clearly want, but it's not easy.

[jumper sage]

So who was sent home?

[spiderpig]

2 minutes ago, jumper sage said:

So who was sent home?

Nobody!  Which made this episode all the more pointless.

[HunterHunted]

3 hours ago, spiderpig said:

Is Carmen Electra that short, or are the rest of them professional basketball players?

She's pretty short. 5'2" or 5'3". She was married to Dave Navarro. If you look at pictures of the two of them, he's a decent amount taller than her and he's only 5'8".

[biakbiak]

1 hour ago, HunterHunted said:

She's pretty short. 5'2" or 5'3". She was married to Dave Navarro. If you look at pictures of the two of them, he's a decent amount taller than her and he's only 5'8".

She was the same height as Prince, she wasn't even taller than him when she wore heels b excuse so did he.

[Nessie]

Finally catching up on this show after noticing a few episodes on my DVR.  It hasn't been on my "must watch list" for years (too much emphasis on annoying, over-the-top "characters"), so color me shocked when I (and my very cynical son) found ourselves laughing quite a bit during the episode), AND I recognized everyone except the Bachelor guy, which is a show I have never watched.  Loved Melissa and Carson, loved Carson calling Ted, laughed my ass off at Carson's giant carrot on his plate next to his lamp and how he kept insisting his dish was seasoned (like he thought if he said it enough, Anne would start believing him) and how they made it look like Carmen just grated cheese for the entire first challenge...I was seriously confused as to where her lasagna came from when it appeared.  I just really enjoyed it.  I didn't even dislike Perez Hilton or Carmen as much as I thought I would, although I will be seriously disappointed if Carson doesn't shout "MURDERER" at her across the kitchen every time she has to cook shellfish...or any meat, really.

[MajorWoody]

On 8/27/2017 at 5:51 PM, Snarklepuss said:

I take back what I said about Erik not ageing well.  I didn't realize he was 68 years old.  I thought he was several years younger.  From what I've read about him, he supports and does work for a fair amount of charities/community causes.  He has also at various times actually been sworn into police departments in different states as a reserve officer or sheriff to work on various task forces.  He's also a native New Yorker (born in Brooklyn). Interesting guy, so why is he on this train wreck?

Probably on here because he needs the dough and keeping his name out there,  just like the rest of these has beens.

On a related note regarding his career, he was pushing some cheap Florida real estate on late night TV irelentlessly about 15 years or so ago. It was either Palm Coast or Palm Bay, can't remember which one. Still playing off his Ponch character, like he did on this show, 40 years after the fact. 

[LennieBriscoe]

Carson is from my local area of PA, so YOU GO, HOMEBOY! He's playing a character, even a caricature, a resident of "The Bird Cage." But as with the food, one either likes or doesn't. I love. ? Now I need to watch his baking season (who knew?!).

I thought Erik Estrada looked DAMN good. But then, I'm his age. ? 

Married "Bachelor" Sean is making Reality Show hay while the sun shines. Kind of like Carson! 

I like Carmen Electra. She's a throwback to the days of ditzy busty dames such as Carol Wayne.

But I really don't need to see live lobsters put into the pot.