Sex And The City - General Discussion

[RealHousewife]

8 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Also, just because you HAVE the money doesn’t mean you can afford something. If Charlotte set up her life to live off of the monthly income from her trust not her salary (or vice versa), and the shoes didn’t fit in the budget the shoes just didn’t fit. Even if yeah she had the money. 

Yup. My grandparents are rich. Some of my aunts and uncles work. Some of them do not. My grandparents don't have such extreme wealth that their kids can all spend like there's no tomorrow and not work. They all live quite well, but they want to make sure the money lasts a lifetime. 

[Scarlett45]

4 hours ago, txhorns79 said:

From what I recall, it was one of those agreements where she would have only gotten some portion of $1,000,000.00 for each year married.  It wasn't one where she just gets $1,000,000.00.  My presumption was that she got the apartment in lieu of anything else because the apartment would have been a multi-million dollar asset. 

I assumed she got the cash as negotiated in the prenup (a portion of $1mill for each year they were married, which I think they only made a year or so in show time), and the apartment was a GIFT from Trey, given how the marriage broke down and the effort she had put in. I do think it was nice for Trey to give her the apartment, and I understand why he did. Charlotte did work very hard on their marriage, and he was the one who changed his mind about pursuing parenthood (again, that was 100% the right thing for him to do if he wasn't interested!) when he knew at the start of the marriage parenthood was super important to her.

Bunny was a real trip. A stamp collection??? Now yes I know that the McDougal Trust owned the apartment but COME ON NOW Bunny.

[txhorns79]

15 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Bunny was a real trip. A stamp collection??? Now yes I know that the McDougal Trust owned the apartment but COME ON NOW Bunny.

Why exactly did Charlotte deserve more than what was called for in her pre-nup?  It wasn't a long marriage. 

[Scarlett45]

5 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

Why exactly did Charlotte deserve more than what was called for in her pre-nup?  It wasn't a long marriage. 

I don’t think Charlotte was entitled to it, she didn’t ask for it, Trey gave it to her as a gift because he wanted her to have it at the end of the marriage. Nothing stops people from giving MORE than is given in the prenup- the prenup is a baseline. Trey didnt expect Charlotte to give back any of the other gifts he gave her throughout the marriage (like jewelry or shoes). He gave it to her before he left. 
 

If Bunny had an issue with what Trey gave to Charlotte (as a gift) the appropriate thing to do would be to take that up with her son, not Charlotte IMO.

[txhorns79]

1 minute ago, Scarlett45 said:

If Bunny had an issue with what Trey gave to Charlotte (as a gift) the appropriate thing to do would be to take that up with her son, not Charlotte IMO. 

I don't see how she could have avoided bringing it up with Charlotte, given Charlotte was trying to claim the apartment as her own. 

[Scarlett45]

3 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

I don't see how she could have avoided bringing it up with Charlotte, given Charlotte was trying to claim the apartment as her own. 

I think it was telling when Trey told Bunny "Stop mother, stop." she left it alone.

If Bunny was being appropriate, upon Charlotte saying, "no I am not leaving the apartment, Trey gave it to me." Bunny would have said "okay I will discuss this with my son."- which she didnt do, instead she offered her a stamp collection in lieu of the apartment. And upon Trey learning what was going on, again reiterated that he gave Charlotte the apartment, Bunny didnt need to be meeting with lawyers etc.

 

Of course the character was interesting, but we were not surprised that she did what she did, "boundaries" were not her strong suit before they were even married.

[txhorns79]

Just now, Scarlett45 said:

 

If Bunny was being appropriate, upon Charlotte saying, "no I am not leaving the apartment, Trey gave it to me." Bunny would have said "okay I will discuss this with my son."- which she didnt do, instead she offered her a stamp collection in lieu of the apartment.

I don't really follow that.  I think she told Charlotte the apartment was not Trey's to give, which was true.  What exactly would she have had to discuss with Trey?  If it isn't his property, he can't give it away.  I thought Bunny backed down at the conference because Trey sided with Charlotte and that wasn't a fight Bunny wanted to take on, not because Charlotte's argument had any actual merit. 

[Scarlett45]

11 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

I don't really follow that.  I think she told Charlotte the apartment was not Trey's to give, which was true.  What exactly would she have had to discuss with Trey?  If it isn't his property, he can't give it away.  I thought Bunny backed down at the conference because Trey sided with Charlotte and that wasn't a fight Bunny wanted to take on, not because Charlotte's argument had any actual merit. 

But if Trey didn't have rights to give the apartment, that was Trey's mistake. He should have to face Bunny and HE should be the one speaking with Charlotte about it. Why would Charlotte be talking to Bunny about property she believed to be hers, given to her by her husband before their divorce? I think Bunny was using it an excuse to be ridiculous. If there was a fight to take on it was with Trey (the bad actor giving away family property incorrectly), not Charlotte, who received a gift with honorable intentions. She didnt blackmail Trey or deceive him into giving the apartment. Of course Trey sided with Charlotte, he was the one who gave her the apartment, and Bunny KNEW all of this before hand. She was just hoping she could get the apartment back and cause grief for Charlotte without Trey getting involved. 

That's just how I saw it.

[txhorns79]

2 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Why would Charlotte be talking to Bunny about property she believed to be hers, given to her by her husband? I think Bunny was using it an excuse to be ridiculous. If there was a fight to take on it was with Trey (the bad actor giving away family property incorrectly), not Charlotte, who received a gift with honorable intentions. She didnt blackmail Trey or deceive him into giving the apartment. 

If Bunny is the person who actually controls the property, and Charlotte is claiming it as her own, then it would make sense that they would talk to one another.  What exactly would Bunny be fighting Trey over?  If he can't gift Charlotte the apartment because it isn't his property, it doesn't matter how honorable his intentions were when offering her the property.  Charlotte still would not be entitled to claim the property as her own. 

[Scarlett45]

1 minute ago, txhorns79 said:

If Bunny is the person who actually controls the property, and Charlotte is claiming it as her own, then it would make sense that they would talk to one another.  What exactly would Bunny be fighting Trey over?  If he can't gift Charlotte the apartment because it isn't his property, it doesn't matter how honorable his intentions were when offering her the property.  Charlotte still would not be entitled to claim the property as her own. 

I see where you are coming from, I suppose my perception is colored by what we know about Bunny. I didn't mind her having a singular conversation with Charlotte but the backing down upon Trey getting involved, tells me that Trey did have rights to dispose of the apartment (or at least more leeway than Bunny was suggesting) and Bunny just didn't like Charlotte and wanted to be thorn in her side.

 

If I wanted Charlotte out of the apartment, knowing what I know, I would've made it Trey's job to get her out, since he was the one that messed up with the gift, and THEN if he wouldn't I would've dealt with it.

[Ms Blue Jay]

For anyone interested here are the important parts of the script

Episode 414:

Quote

 I don't want to do this.
- It's just one picture, and it's important to me.
No, this. I don't want to do this anymore. You are so angry at me.
I'm sorry. I want a baby. I thought that's what you wanted, too.
- So did l.
- I don't think I should have to give that up.
Trey: You shouldn't. You can have the apartment. I'll move back in with mother. 
- Okay.

Episode 505:

Quote

Charlotte:  Trey gave me this apartment.
Bunny:  It's not Trey's to give. And this apartment remains in the MacDougal name whereas you, Charlotte York, do not. So, you see, it's rather a sticky subject made stickier by the fact that you're still married.

Episode 506:

Quote

Charlotte's Lawyer:  Technically, it's not your apartment. Trey's family owns it. She was very careful to ensure your name was not on the deed.

Quote

Trey's Telegram:  "Charlotte York was a wonderful wife. Stop.She did nothing wrong. Stop. Give her everything she wants. Stop. Seriously, Mother. Stop."

This is all kind of sticky.  It's apparently in the MacDougall name, whatever that means.  I wonder if it's under MacDougall but specifically not under Trey.  If it was under Trey, there'd be no issue.

Obviously, Trey used it as his own and surely the family intended for Trey to his it as his own.

Trey "gifted" it to Charlotte.

Bunny disagreed that he should or could do that.

I don't see how Charlotte did anything "wrong".  If property is gifted to her, I can't exactly blame her for wanting it.  I agree that the conflict is between Bunny and Trey.

Edited March 8, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Black Knight]

That line of Trey's, "I'll move back in with mother." So he was living with his mother before his marriage to Charlotte? And then the apartment was made available to Trey and Charlotte to use upon their marriage. Did the family already own the apartment or was it bought expressly for the newlywed couple? The lawyer's line about Bunny being very careful to ensure that Charlotte's name was not on the deed makes me think it was the latter.

And if so, I can certainly see why Trey would think he had the right to give the apartment to Charlotte. From his point of view, it was always his and Charlotte's apartment, together, a wedding gift from the family. He and Charlotte should both have paid more attention to the actual paperwork, but as we know from the prenuptial episode, Trey never got involved in those details. And Charlotte was probably worn out enough from the prenuptial negotiations, especially since as a romantic at heart she figured she and Trey would last.

On Bunny's side, she had the legal stuff down for sure, but she was also unwilling to go against her son if and when push came to shove, and she lost to Charlotte twice because of it. So on Bunny's part, she should have expended more effort on insisting Trey be involved in the legal arrangements, rather than just using her son's laziness to unilaterally set up everything the way she wanted, which backfired on her. It's kind of like the maxim about never making a threat you're not prepared to follow through on.

[txhorns79]

23 minutes ago, Black Knight said:

That line of Trey's, "I'll move back in with mother." So he was living with his mother before his marriage to Charlotte? And then the apartment was made available to Trey and Charlotte to use upon their marriage. Did the family already own the apartment or was it bought expressly for the newlywed couple? The lawyer's line about Bunny being very careful to ensure that Charlotte's name was not on the deed makes me think it was the latter.

Trey was living in the apartment before he married Charlotte.  I remember Charlotte wanted it redecorated from the plaids and mallards, and Trey said Bunny had decorated it for him. 

You could also read Trey telling Charlotte she could have the apartment while he moved back in with his mother, simply meant that he would not make her move out during the separation/divorce, or otherwise try to have some kind of arrangement where they both stayed in the apartment. 

For me, I just always roll my eyes when Charlotte later claims that she "earned" the apartment.  She rushed into a marriage, had problems and apparently got out within a year.  It sucks, but this wasn't exactly end of the world stuff here. 

[RealHousewife]

1 minute ago, txhorns79 said:

Trey was living in the apartment before he married Charlotte.  I remember Charlotte wanted it redecorated from the plaids and mallards, and Trey said Bunny had decorated it for him. 

You could also read Trey telling Charlotte she could have the apartment while he moved back in with his mother, simply meant that he would not make her move out during the separation/divorce, or otherwise try to have some kind of arrangement where they both stayed in the apartment. 

For me, I just always roll my eyes when Charlotte later claims that she "earned" the apartment.  She rushed into a marriage, had problems and apparently got out within a year.  It sucks, but this wasn't exactly end of the world stuff here. 

I like Charlotte more than most. There aren't a ton of feminine, traditional characters on TV so a part of me was always drawn to her, but I agree with this. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

11 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

You could also read Trey telling Charlotte she could have the apartment while he moved back in with his mother, simply meant that he would not make her move out during the separation/divorce, or otherwise try to have some kind of arrangement where they both stayed in the apartment. 

I agree with this part; it's a huge leap that Charlotte took that to mean that she could have and own the apartment.

I read it as Trey saying, we're fighting right now, let's separate, and for now you could stay here.

But....... I don't know.  I guess the show and Trey intended it was a gift.  

13 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

For me, I just always roll my eyes when Charlotte later claims that she "earned" the apartment.  She rushed into a marriage, had problems and apparently got out within a year.  It sucks, but this wasn't exactly end of the world stuff here. 

I don't care about the earning or not earning.  A gift is a gift.  If Trey wants to give her something the earning doesn't matter to me.  People don't earn my Christmas gifts.  I buy people whatever I want.

[ifionlyknew]

10 hours ago, txhorns79 said:

For me, I just always roll my eyes when Charlotte later claims that she "earned" the apartment.  She rushed into a marriage, had problems and apparently got out within a year.  It sucks, but this wasn't exactly end of the world stuff here. 

But for Charlotte it was.  She thought she had found her prince and was going to get her fairy tale.

[txhorns79]

20 minutes ago, ifionlyknew said:

But for Charlotte it was.  She thought she had found her prince and was going to get her fairy tale.

And therein lies the problem.  She married a real person, not a fairy tale. 

[ifionlyknew]

1 minute ago, txhorns79 said:

And therein lies the problem.  She married a real person, not a fairy tale. 

She learned her lesson. The next time she married a real person who loved her unconditionally. I've said before Charlotte and Harry ended up being my favorite couple. What was it that Jackie O'Nassis said?  Your first marriage is for love, the second for money and the third for companionship.  Lucky Charlotte only needed two to get it all.

[txhorns79]

3 hours ago, ifionlyknew said:

The next time she married a real person who loved her unconditionally.

Did Trey not love her unconditionally?  They reached an impasse over an issue where there was no compromise.  That happens to many couples, and I don't view it as a measure of love. 

[ifionlyknew]

17 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

Did Trey not love her unconditionally?  They reached an impasse over an issue where there was no compromise.  That happens to many couples, and I don't know view it as a measure of love. 

Trey married Charlotte because she wanted to get married.  Their's was not a great love affair.

[BlueMoon81]

The Trey and Charlotte discussions are always very interesting to me. I personally don’t think that Trey was a bad guy in the slightest—he was sweet (in his own way), kind, and would never intentionally hurt a hair on Charlotte’s head. He just wasn’t the right guy for her at the end of the day. I love that the show held them up as an example that just because a marriage ends, doesn’t mean that one party has to be the “good guy” and the other the “bad guy”. It provided some wonderful balance on the show, juxtaposed to Carrie’s dramas and ETERNAL NEED to be seen as “the injured, unknowing, naive victim” of whomever she broke up with 

[ifionlyknew]

8 hours ago, BlueMoon81 said:

The Trey and Charlotte discussions are always very interesting to me. I personally don’t think that Trey was a bad guy in the slightest—he was sweet (in his own way), kind, and would never intentionally hurt a hair on Charlotte’s head. He just wasn’t the right guy for her at the end of the day. I love that the show held them up as an example that just because a marriage ends, doesn’t mean that one party has to be the “good guy” and the other the “bad guy”. It provided some wonderful balance on the show, juxtaposed to Carrie’s dramas and ETERNAL NEED to be seen as “the injured, unknowing, naive victim” of whomever she broke up with 

I didn't dislike Trey.  He was an OK guy. But like you said just not the right guy for Charlotte.  If  you believe in fate she never would have met Harry if not for Trey so things worked out.

Even when Carrie was clearly in the wrong and knew it (with Aiden the first time) she still wanted to be the victim. With Big it was he can't commit. With Aiden (the second time) it was he wants a commitment. And with Berger it was he broke up with her on a post it.  Which yes that is a shitty way to do it but their relationship wasn't working.  Wanna bet someone in that writer's room was broken up with by post it?

Edited March 10, 2021 by ifionlyknew

[Jillybean]

On 3/8/2021 at 11:26 AM, txhorns79 said:

From what I recall, it was one of those agreements where she would have only gotten some portion of $1,000,000.00 for each year married.  It wasn't one where she just gets $1,000,000.00.  My presumption was that she got the apartment in lieu of anything else because the apartment would have been a multi-million dollar asset. 

Yep, according to Miranda, the pre-nup had Charlotte "on a vesting schedule." I believe the original fully vested amount was $500K, and she negotiated with Bunny to $1M. It's unclear what, if any, cash she got along with the apartment. We do know she kept her ring.

[Avabelle]

On 3/9/2021 at 3:22 AM, txhorns79 said:

For me, I just always roll my eyes when Charlotte later claims that she "earned" the apartment.  She rushed into a marriage, had problems and apparently got out within a year.  It sucks, but this wasn't exactly end of the world stuff here. 

Given she had to sell her engagement ring in order to pay for the down payment on Carries apartment maybe the writers agreed with you.

Even if Charlotte didn’t earn that apartment I will defend her to the ground over the absurdity of that episode and the way Carrie treated her. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

I still don't get the concept of earning gifts 😄    Whether she earned it or not is a moot point to me.  The writers write that Trey gives Charlotte an apartment, and then they almost seem to resent her for it, having Carrie try and shame her for it.  Beyond stupid.  Divorce is not a privilege.  

[ifionlyknew]

9 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

I still don't get the concept of earning gifts 😄    Whether she earned it or not is a moot point to me.  The writers write that Trey gives Charlotte an apartment, and then they almost seem to resent her for it, having Carrie try and shame her for it.  Beyond stupid.  Divorce is not a privilege.  

Carrie was jealous Aidan didn't give her an apartment.

[txhorns79]

Food for thought: I think the the greatest love story on the show is between Miranda and Magda.  Those two do a lot with their limited shared screentime.       

[RealHousewife]

Anyone else ever been friends with a Carrie?

I have a friend in my life I care for very much. I feel bad saying this, but since she's a nameless, faceless person, I'll go ahead and say she can also be crazy, dramatic, and entitled.

She's very pushy with the men she dated. One relationship of hers ended because the guy didn't want to move in with her after a short relationship full of fighting and drama. She then decided to stalk the guy she was with prior. She previously told him to never, ever contact her because she found someone. Since she was single again, she sought him out, told him to call her, but he did not. She then asked me to go to his job with her to see him again. I said no, and that what she was doing was stalking. It reminded me of Carrie showing up at Church to see Big's mother. 

She got married not too long ago to someone she barely dated. If she wants something, she wants it now. If she is single and lonely, she wants your company asap. If she's busy with a man and whatnot, she'll ignore you. If she's in a bind she should be able to get out of on her own, she expects friends to go above and beyond to help her, even when it's at an extreme detriment to their own lives. She gets pouty when she doesn't get her way. It reminds me a little of Carrie and how she treated Charlotte about the apartment and lending her money. 

[Hiyo]

Does she show up with bullshit bagels while pretending to want to talk about your problems but then pivots the conversation back to her after 10 seconds?

[chitowngirl]

And doesn’t even bring cream cheese with the bullshit bagels?? 

[MaggieG]

So I am doing a rewatch since we got HBO Max and I figured why not? I'm on season 3, the beginning of Carrie and Aidan and I noticed something and I have no idea if I'm right. One scene has Carrie and Aidan walking down the street. I believe it's the episode where he wants her to meet his parents. John Corbett is a full head taller than SJP. Then in a later scene in the furniture shop they're talking and she's still shorter but not as short. I noticed it because in the street when they stand next to each other, the top of her head comes to his shoulder. Then in the shop, the top of her head comes to his nose. I was thinking they may have had SJP stand on a box for that.

The show and it's characters may have had their faults but I'm enjoying rewatching. You always notice things you never did before. Like Carrie throwing up on the beach after she saw Big and Natasha. I thought that was a bit overdramatic.

[qtpye]

On 3/10/2021 at 8:49 AM, ifionlyknew said:

I didn't dislike Trey.  He was an OK guy. But like you said just not the right guy for Charlotte.  If  you believe in fate she never would have met Harry if not for Trey so things worked out.

Even when Carrie was clearly in the wrong and knew it (with Aiden the first time) she still wanted to be the victim. With Big it was he can't commit. With Aiden (the second time) it was he wants a commitment. And with Berger it was he broke up with her on a post it.  Which yes that is a shitty way to do it but their relationship wasn't working.  Wanna bet someone in that writer's room was broken up with by post it?

The post it is better than the ghosting that people do today though it still was pretty shitty.

 

On 3/17/2021 at 6:03 AM, ifionlyknew said:

Carrie was jealous Aidan didn't give her an apartment.

It was obvious after they broke up, Carrie thought Aiden would let her live there with the same rent or maybe even rent free. The apartment was twice as big because Aiden had knocked down the wall when he bought the apartment next door and combined it with her apartment (I think...its been a while).

[Hiyo]

I don’t believe he did knock down the walls, he started to but then Carrie had a freak out when he was doing it and got him to stop.

[Ms Blue Jay]

2 hours ago, MaggieG said:

The show and it's characters may have had their faults but I'm enjoying rewatching. You always notice things you never did before. Like Carrie throwing up on the beach after she saw Big and Natasha. I thought that was a bit overdramatic.

Shitty writers always do this for shock value.   There are so many vomit scenes in movies and television.  It's one of the worst cliches to me.  There are other ways to convey people being shocked or upset, but writers love to go for the vomit!

56 minutes ago, qtpye said:

The post it is better than the ghosting that people do today though it still was pretty shitty.

I think "ghosting" is what people do after speaking to someone for a while, or maybe a one night stand.  Berger and Carrie were in a real, actual relationship.  If he "ghosted" her at that point Carrie would be worried something bad had happened to him.

i.e. Miranda has a date with someone and she gets stood up.... she was "ghosted"...... by someone who was actually dead!  🙃

But yeah, the Post-it was just sooooooo super immature.

Edited March 31, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[qtpye]

23 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Shitty writers always do this for shock value.   There are so many vomit scenes in movies and television.  It's one of the worst cliches to me.  There are other ways to convey people being shocked or upset, but writers love to go for the vomit!

I think "ghosting" is what people do after speaking to someone for a while, or maybe a one night stand.  Berger and Carrie were in a real, actual relationship.  If he "ghosted" her at that point Carrie would be worried something bad had happened to him.

i.e. Miranda has a date with someone and she gets stood up.... she was "ghosted"...... by someone who was actually dead!  🙃

But yeah, the Post-it was just sooooooo super immature.

Sadly, I know a lady who was ghosted after dating a guy for two months.  He just stopped all contact but never said anything about ending the relationship. The post-it was horrible but at least there was closure.

[Jillybean]

On 3/31/2021 at 1:47 PM, MaggieG said:

So I am doing a rewatch since we got HBO Max and I figured why not? I'm on season 3, the beginning of Carrie and Aidan and I noticed something and I have no idea if I'm right. One scene has Carrie and Aidan walking down the street. I believe it's the episode where he wants her to meet his parents. John Corbett is a full head taller than SJP. Then in a later scene in the furniture shop they're talking and she's still shorter but not as short. I noticed it because in the street when they stand next to each other, the top of her head comes to his shoulder. Then in the shop, the top of her head comes to his nose. I was thinking they may have had SJP stand on a box for that.

The show and it's characters may have had their faults but I'm enjoying rewatching. You always notice things you never did before. Like Carrie throwing up on the beach after she saw Big and Natasha. I thought that was a bit overdramatic.

I did a full rewatch on HBOMax too. I have the DVDs but never bother with them. It had been years since I'd watched the full, unedited episodes and there was a lot that I'd forgotten. The rewatch confirmed that Samantha really was inconsistently written. So often she was such a caricature. And there were times Sam was totally ride-or-die, which is in keeping with her character, and other times she had to be told to make a minimal friend gesture. I don't believe Sam would have been so self-centered or clueless that she'd have to be told to express condolences to Miranda on the death of her mother, for example. Kim Cattrall did amazing things with what she was given.

[Ms Blue Jay]

4 hours ago, Jillybean said:

 I don't believe Sam would have been so self-centered or clueless that she'd have to be told to express condolences to Miranda on the death of her mother, for example. Kim Cattrall did amazing things with what she was given.

I didn't read that as Samantha being self-centred or clueless!  I read that as Samantha being deeply, deeply afraid of mortality and death and not being able to handle it.  She acted the same with regards to her AIDS test.  Everyone's afraid of death but I think the show was trying to portray Samantha as an extreme fun-lover who had major problems dealing with the other parts of life. 

In contrast, Charlotte is shown at being extremely adept in a crisis.  Not everyone is like that, either! 

Edited April 2, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[txhorns79]

5 hours ago, Jillybean said:

I don't believe Sam would have been so self-centered or clueless that she'd have to be told to express condolences to Miranda on the death of her mother, for example.

I didn't think Samantha would be so tacky as to think it would be appropriate to not only screw Charlotte's brother, but to do it in Charlotte's apartment and then stay over so Charlotte could find her in the kitchen the next morning wearing only her brother's t-shirt.   

[RealHousewife]

15 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

I didn't think Samantha would be so tacky as to think it would be appropriate to not only screw Charlotte's brother, but to do it in Charlotte's apartment and then stay over so Charlotte could find her in the kitchen the next morning wearing only her brother's t-shirt.   

This. There’s a lot I like about Sam, but sometimes I feel like I’m the only one who’s not in the Samantha does no wrong camp. Carrie was very flawed, but the rest of them were hardly perfect. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

1 hour ago, RealHousewife said:

This. There’s a lot I like about Sam, but sometimes I feel like I’m the only one who’s not in the Samantha does no wrong camp. Carrie was very flawed, but the rest of them were hardly perfect. 

It's all perception.  I feel like the "Sam can only do wrong" camp is just as big if not bigger.  Everyone has their biases, and mine is definitely that I can see where Samantha and Miranda are coming from a lot of the time.  And even Carrie, before Season 3.

Edited April 2, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[RealHousewife]

29 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

It's all perception.  I feel like the "Sam can only do wrong" camp is just as big if not bigger.  Everyone has their biases, and mine is definitely that I can see where Samantha and Miranda are coming from a lot of the time.  And even Carrie, before Season 3.

Yeah that's probably why the show was so successful. The women were all so different and appealed to different people. I'm more comfortable around women who are "softer" so I was always drawn to Charlotte. I also am a fan of SJP as an actress and think she made Carrie an incredibly charming lead for a very flawed character. I do like both Samantha and Miranda. I'm just more critical of them than most here. If someone were to ask who could you most relate to, I wouldn't know how to answer. 

ETA: I probably relate more to Kristin Davis than any of the characters. That probably also gives me a soft spot for Charlotte despite things I don't like about her and/or can't relate to. Kristin is the nice girl type, feminine, but not defined by men nor super romantic. She's kind of a hybrid of Charlotte and the other characters herself. 

Edited April 2, 2021 by RealHousewife

[Jillybean]

9 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

I didn't read that as Samantha being self-centred or clueless!  I read that as Samantha being deeply, deeply afraid of mortality and death and not being able to handle it.  She acted the same with regards to her AIDS test.  Everyone's afraid of death but I think the show was trying to portray Samantha as an extreme fun-lover who had major problems dealing with the other parts of life. 

True, but when Miranda's mom died, Samantha seemed more concerned that she had "lost" her orgasm. There were other examples, too, like when she practically shoved Miranda and baby Brady in a cab after brunch so the others could go shopping. Carrie had to point out that Miranda was sinking, and then Samantha came over to babysit and gave Miranda her appointment with John Mandy at the John Mandy Salon. 

[qtpye]

9 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

Yeah that's probably why the show was so successful. The women were all so different and appealed to different people. I'm more comfortable around women who are "softer" so I was always drawn to Charlotte. I also am a fan of SJP as an actress and think she made Carrie an incredibly charming lead for a very flawed character. I do like both Samantha and Miranda. I'm just more critical of them than most here. If someone were to ask who could you most relate to, I wouldn't know how to answer. 

ETA: I probably relate more to Kristin Davis than any of the characters. That probably also gives me a soft spot for Charlotte despite things I don't like about her and/or can't relate to. Kristin is the nice girl type, feminine, but not defined by men nor super romantic. She's kind of a hybrid of Charlotte and the other characters herself. 

You know I was thinking about something the other day. Everyone, (sometimes including me) has always given Carrie a hard time for the way that she treated Aiden. However, I have a legitimate question...why the Hell would someone like Aiden be attracted to someone like Carrie beyond the script saying that he was madly in love with her?

I mean Carrie was attractive and charming...so I get that, but Aiden was supposed to this granola fueled master craftsman who loved to be outdoors in nature. He liked to stay in most nights and enjoy the simple life.

Why would that type of guy fall in love with a women who was obsessed with fashion, going out to the hottest club every night, and being part of the in-crowd? Did he thinks she would magically change?

I do not ever see Carrie trading in her Manolo Blahniks for some Timberlands...ever.

She broke his hear twice, but she was right that they were not a very good match. On paper, a person like her would definitely be more interested in a Big than an Aiden.

[Ms Blue Jay]

2 hours ago, qtpye said:

You know I was thinking about something the other day. Everyone, (sometimes including me) has always given Carrie a hard time for the way that she treated Aiden. However, I have a legitimate question...why the Hell would someone like Aiden be attracted to someone like Carrie beyond the script saying that he was madly in love with her?

This tends to happen a lot of shows with THE STAAAAAAAR (Norma Desmond voice).  All the men come calling for the irresistible Carrie Bradshaw!  

But to be serious, Carrie very aggressively pursued him, and he kind of relented, AND, he made her quit smoking to date him.  So if he was a guy who had only had simple relationships before Carrie, I could see how Carrie drove him crazy.  He wanted a simple relationship, be in love, get married, have kids, that's it.  Carrie absolutely didn't want that (she just liked to claim that she did).  So I think all of her push and pull just made Aidan insane and that's what made him become obsessed with trying to get her to commit.  If she had just loved him and treated him right I don't think he'd be that obsessed.

Aidan is the Carrie of the Carrie/Big dynamic (as we've said before).

[Scarlett45]

3 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

This tends to happen a lot of shows with THE STAAAAAAAR (Norma Desmond voice).  All the men come calling for the irresistible Carrie Bradshaw!  

But to be serious, Carrie very aggressively pursued him, and he kind of relented, AND, he made her quit smoking to date him.  So if he was a guy who had only had simple relationships before Carrie, I could see how Carrie drove him crazy.  He wanted a simple relationship, be in love, get married, have kids, that's it.  Carrie absolutely didn't want that (she just liked to claim that she did).  So I think all of her push and pull just made Aidan insane and that's what made him become obsessed with trying to get her to commit.  If she had just loved him and treated him right I don't think he'd be that obsessed.

Aidan is the Carrie of the Carrie/Big dynamic (as we've said before).

I agree with you. I also think that because Aiden was so chill and laid back, a Carrie type was "exciting" for him in a new way and that was thrilling. Ideally Aiden needed someone to add a little "pizzaz" to his life, but had the same core values. Carrie wasn't that woman.

 

I think Aiden was probably a guy who had never dated anyone with the emotional issues Carrie had. Carrie liked the attention Aiden paid her, but she didnt really want Aiden- she got back with him because she was lonely and she realized Big wasn't into her. Aiden does what he thinks is the right thing and proposes, and then Carrie breaks his heart AGAIN. Aiden was intrigued by Carrie because in his head he was doing everything a man was supposed to do to be a good partner, and she wasnt reciprocating. 

And although women get a lot of pressure to partner due to our much shorter reproductive lifespan and social issues, men have the pressure in a different way. I am 35 and I have notice for my peers that are single (men and women), if you are 35 and still unpartnered (and have never been partnered) there is a feeling of being "behind" or "left out" (especially if you want a partner, or thought you would have one and it had never had happened). At 35 many of your peers are partnered and have had kids (of course not all), and I could see Aiden being more focused on Carrie at 36 than he would've been at 26 just because he didn't want to start over again dating someone new if he didn't have to.

[Ms Blue Jay]

2 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

And although women get a lot of pressure to partner due to our much shorter reproductive lifespan and social issues, men have the pressure in a different way. I am 35 and I have notice for my peers that are single (men and women), if you are 35 and still unpartnered (and have never been partnered) there is a feeling of being "behind" or "left out" (especially if you want a partner, or thought you would have one and it had never had happened). At 35 many of your peers are partnered and have had kids (of course not all), and I could see Aiden being more focused on Carrie at 36 than he would've been at 26 just because he didn't want to start over again dating someone new if he didn't have to.

That's just how Aidan's brain works - and I mean that in a nice way.  He's like Charlotte that way.  If two people are in love at 36, why wouldn't they commit, move in with each other, get married?  Instead, Carrie's brain is let me have an affair with my married ex.  LOL!!!!!!  Aidan was a nice guy and Carrie couldn't even handle that.  

[RealHousewife]

5 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

That's just how Aidan's brain works - and I mean that in a nice way.  He's like Charlotte that way.  If two people are in love at 36, why wouldn't they commit, move in with each other, get married?  Instead, Carrie's brain is let me have an affair with my married ex.  LOL!!!!!!  Aidan was a nice guy and Carrie couldn't even handle that.  

Completely agree with ya on this. 🙂

 

[ifionlyknew]

On 4/2/2021 at 8:02 PM, Ms Blue Jay said:

That's just how Aidan's brain works - and I mean that in a nice way.  He's like Charlotte that way.  If two people are in love at 36, why wouldn't they commit, move in with each other, get married? 

It's true.  Aidan got married and had a kid not long after him and Carrie broke up.  So from my perspective he didn't want to marry Carrie. He just wanted to get married.  

On 4/2/2021 at 11:38 AM, qtpye said:

I do not ever see Carrie trading in her Manolo Blahniks for some Timberlands...ever.

This is one thing I have in common with Carrie.  I am not the outdoorsy type at all.  Aidan's cabin in the woods would be like roughing it for me.

 

[Ms Blue Jay]

I'm not outdoorsy either, but I could deal with the cabin for a weekend or whatever to make the guy happy.  It looked fine to me.  I wouldn't be shrieking and I wouldn't make that place the first place I try to make pie or whatever, LOL.  And I wouldn't have brought a friend.

[chitowngirl]

Or invited the ex that I cheated on the guy with to come up to the cabin!