All Episodes Talk: All Rise

[iwasish]

Wasn't The African Queen an old tugboat piloted by Bogey and Kate?  (Just kidding!)

 

What I wanted JJ to ask Espresso's boyfriend was:  is it true what they say about crazy women being super hot in the sack?

 

(I'll go sit in a corner now, thanks.)

He'd have to get her in the sack first and then be still long enough to get in there.

Edited May 26, 2015 by iwasish

[AngelaHunter]

Why aren't you married after 7 years (and x number of kids) together?

 

There are so many answers to that, but my favorites run along the lines of: "I don't trust him/he won't work/he's abusive/a drunk/a druggie...he's fine to procreate with - after all, they're only kids -  but marry? I have standards."

[Ouisch]

Looks like Brandon Milby, the co-signer for Expresso-Head Shannon Jones, is no stranger to controversy. Perhaps he had ulterior motives for buying a car on her behalf.

[knitorpurl]

I did not notice during the first airing but the African Queen vs the Baseball coach are from Shawnee, KS. That is the next town over from me. Yikes- I'm heading to Shawnee for a meeting tonight. Hope to make it out without a "1-2-3 on my head".

 

Guess it's better than my former state of residence, Minnesota, which has to endure it's dirty laundry drug out every week.

[Intocats]

There are so many answers to that, but my favorites run along the lines of: "I don't trust him/he won't work/he's abusive/a drunk/a druggie...he's fine to procreate with - after all, they're only kids -  but marry? I have standards."

Word to this, AngelaHunter. One of my co-workers had a child with a deadbeat whom she deems too much of a loser to marry. What does she do ten years later? Has another child with said deadbeat, because she "wanted her kids to have the same father". Sheesh.

 

I predict we will see her on JJ someday, for one thing or another.

 

To all the posters (and lurkers) in Oklahoma and Texas, where there are terrible floods and tornadoes right now….I'm thinking of you. I hope you and yours stay safe and please let us know how you are, when you get a chance.

Looks like Brandon Milby, the co-signer for Expresso-Head Shannon Jones, is no stranger to controversy. Perhaps he had ulterior motives for buying a car on her behalf.

Thank you for posting that, Ouisch. I wondered how and why Brandon Milby got himself involved with Five-Shots-Espresso and her car loan.

[Brattinella]

Thank you for saying so, intocats!  I'm a resident of one of those unfortunate states.  Luckily, nothing bad has come dangerously close yet!  We do have a shelter that hubby had put in for us and the cats, it's nice to know it's there!  We still have at least a week left of rain/hail/wind and those VERY BAD T-THINGS.  I'll check in once a day, I promise.

[SandyToes]

Bratinella, I was wondering last night if you had any wine and cookies left! It got just a little soggy in my neck of the woods last night. (Woke up this morning to 25 different weather advisories, most of the "River flooding" variety!) JuniorToes has at least learned to park in the driveway when it rains. We missed the bulk of it last night - hit our side of town a week or so ago. Thanks, Intocats for your kind thoughts.  Hurricane season starts on Monday (woo hoo!), so keep 'em comin'!  Hopefully, Bratinella will be done with the Very Bad T-things very soon.  I grew up in the land of Oz, so remember those, too.  Not so many here, but just so much water.

 

Missed all of the afternoon eps, except for the two gals arguing about drinking in a bar.  Cool magenta hair.  Shows were "pre-emptied" by talk about water, flooded cars, more water everywhere.  Like it (or me) was going to go anywhere...  Sigh. Missed the African Queen again. Hopefully can catch Esther the Queen some day - that sounds fun, too!

 

Stay safe everyone - whatever your particular hurdle is this week!

[Brattinella]

You are awfully sweet, Sandy Toes, I would gladly share wine and cookies with you and yours!  I'm sorry you are stuck in the house, hopefully you have enough provision.  I'm sure not gonna miss when this weather season ends!  I hope not to hear any more of houses filled with people being swept away.

Stay safe, dear.  I'll be inside too, bundled in my plush blankie and playing on the computer and watching JJ.  I DO hope you can catch Queen Esther someday; she is well worth waiting for! HUGS!

[Sarcastico]

 

I did not notice during the first airing but the African Queen vs the Baseball coach are from Shawnee, KS.

 

That case reminded me of a true story from the late 1990s, somewhere down south.  Two "Little League moms" got into a fight at a game that resulted in one of them shooting the other dead, at the ballpark.  If I were making a movie of it, I'd call it Murder at Third Base.

 

The Battling Bar Babes were quite striking looking, without actually striking each other.  The plaintiff had eyes about a mile apart and the defendant certainly didn't need that purple hair. 

 

Hey Texas, we'll take some of your rain in the NYC area.  Barely a fraction of an inch in the last month and we're down 5 inches for the year.  Sheesh!

[magicdog]

I was just checking the news headlines when I came across this.  She's the current City State's Attorney of Baltimore, although at the time of this episode, she was a college student.  Enjoy.

 

ETA:  There's a difference between Mayor and City State's Attorney.

Edited May 27, 2015 by magicdog

[Guest]

I was just checking the news headlines when I came across this.  She's the current mayor of Baltimore, although at the time of this episode, she was a college student.  Enjoy.

Logical progression....litigant on JJ - mayor of a city. 

[krb104]

I was just checking the news headlines when I came across this.  She's the current mayor of Baltimore, although at the time of this episode, she was a college student.  Enjoy.

She is actually the City State's Attorney Marilyn Mosby not Mayor Rawlings-Blake.

Edited May 27, 2015 by krb104

[magicdog]

Apologies.  However she seems to be on TV as often as a mayor.  

[krb104]

Logical progression....litigant on JJ - mayor of a city. 

 

Apologies.  However she seems to be on TV as often as a mayor.   

You are right about that as she is on TV often, but as the SA in regards to the Freddy Gray situation.  The mayor seems to hide more often than appearing in public, unless it is a PR junket.  (and yes, I live in Balto)

[SandyToes]

Hookah! Fluka'! Wooten!  

 

What a bunch of weirdos. Party boy hangin' with a bunch of 18 year-olds, and come to find out he's married? Hope wifey watched the case and hit the road.

I cannot even imagine choosing to sue someone when I was 18 years old. Of course, times were different back in the dinosaur days.

[Milz]

Wasn't The African Queen an old tugboat piloted by Bogey and Kate?  (Just kidding!)

 

 

If the guy's name was Charlie Allnut, it would have made my day.

[BubblingKettle]

I'm guessing that both episodes today are reruns, but I hadn't seen the first one.

In the first case with the angry exes, I was surprised that JJ allowed the plaintiff to holler for so long. Their exit and hallterview was entertaining, though:

Plaintiff: "You lie n' you goin' ta hell." 

Defendant: "I'll meet you there."

 

2nd case: I am so effing sick of these irresponsible pet owners who give NO SHITS about these poor animals.  The plaintiff was put-off by the dachshund growling around his own food and chasing the cats?  Boo hoo, bitch --- he's a DOG. Oh, and the other dog was given the bum's rush, too. If it's so bothersome, get into a training class. And the defendant just let the dog continuously dig holes and escape.  Jackass, it's called a LEASH. With two adults and a teen, some could get their lazy ass off the couch and take the dog outside leashed. I hope the dachshund doesn't look in the direction of the cats, fart, or chew a toy, because he'll be back on Craigslist/death row now that the plaintiff has him back.

 

Oh Lawd, the elderly perv and his crack-loving young blonde. So so cringe.

[AngelaHunter]

Today we got a rerun of one of the most sordid, yet entertaining cases ever. Mr. Landy, Delusional Druggie and Dirty Old Man vs. Jami, The Overly Bleached Bimbo, sporting a thick primer of orange makeup and a snickering, disgusting husband in tow. Mr. Landy sexually harassed her for twelve years, but never did she consider giving up the gravy train - I mean, not remaining in his employ. Gee, I wonder why?

 

Ms. Thomas? One word - sleeves! She looked as though her head was badly photoshopped unto someone else's body as she ranted and raved about a TEEVEE, when she and the def. had lived together for seven years. This is why getting married in lieu of playing house  can be a good idea.

 

Rudolph Jr. had a good defense for why he never paid the plaintiff money he owed her for tickets: " What you expect me to say? My potential sponsor didn't fall through. I tole her I'd get the cheque to her and gie her the money. She bas'ly knew..."

"Judgement for the plaintiff. 5000$."

Not a good defense, Rudolph.

 

Oh, I skipped the dog case because just hearing the summary and looking at the litigants made me sick.

Edited May 27, 2015 by AngelaHunter

[Brattinella]

I missed it again.  Damn cable service on the blink again. GRR!

[SandyToes]

I had a hard time at first with the Mr. Landy case. Just kind of sad.  I was greatly relieved when Sugar Baby got the smack down. Justice!

 

And that must have been one helluva TV for that much emotion! Yowza.

[Quof]

http://patch.com/ohio/cuyahogafalls/highspeed-chase-ends-with-felony-arrest

 

Aw, nice mugshot Jami Sesto.

[AngelaHunter]

Aw, nice mugshot Jami Sesto

 

 

Not really surprising.

 

"2013 Dodge Challenger." Probably the car the Dirty Old Man gave her.

[Guest]

Fun with reruns:

"I was broughten into custody." Five minutes later, "I was putten into jail."

-- Gregory Levesque, grammarian/Masshole(?)/future Federal Correctional Inmate

[AngelaHunter]

"I was broughten into custody."  "I was putten into jail."

 

There's something that just seems so very right, so as it should be,  about those statements being said in exactly that way.

[NowVoyager]

Today we got a rerun of one of the most sordid, yet entertaining cases ever. Mr. Landy, Delusional Druggie and Dirty Old Man vs. Jami, The Overly Bleached Bimbo, sporting a thick primer of orange makeup and a snickering, disgusting husband in tow. Mr. Landy sexually harassed her for twelve years, but never did she consider giving up the gravy train - I mean, not remaining in his employ. Gee, I wonder why?

Ms. Thomas? One word - sleeves! She looked as though her head was badly photoshopped unto someone else's body as she ranted and raved about a TEEVEE, when she and the def. had lived together for seven years. This is why getting married in lieu of playing house can be a good idea.

Rudolph Jr. had a good defense for why he never paid the plaintiff money he owed her for tickets: " What you expect me to say? My potential sponsor didn't fall through. I tole her I'd get the cheque to her and gie her the money. She bas'ly knew..."

"Judgement for the plaintiff. 5000$."

Not a good defense, Rudolph.

Oh, I skipped the dog case because just hearing the summary and looking at the litigants made me sick.

Re: Mr. Landy---call me crazy, but I'd rather miss out on the chance to get $5,000 than go on national tv & admit to God & everybody that I'd smoked crack & diddled a vacuous, married blonde. Then again, I have sense of shame.

Re: Ms. Thomas---soo glad I wasn't the only one who noticed her unfortunate tan lines. Has she never watched JJ? "There are no courts for people who choose to live together without the benefit of marriage..." I felt a bit bad for them though. $230 a month for 20 months & the tv & washer & dryer still had a balance of $1600?!? Sounds like they got totally ripped off.

Re: Rudolph jr.---too bad for the plantiff. A $5000 judgement when she was out $10,000. Well, you can't get blood from a turnip; I guess she figured half was better than nothing. I was aghast that she would consider working with him in the future...either there's more to the story or she's too nice for her own good.

Re: the dog case---everything ended well for the dog. The plantiff adopted out her troubled dog. The defendant couldn't care for him properly, so he ended up sick & on doggie death row, only to be rescued by the plantiff. The plantiff wanted the defendant to pay for medical bills incurred by her neglect; no dice because there was never a contract. Meanwhile, the dog came back with a better attitude after his ordeal & has a happy home.

[27bored]

The thing I didn't understand about the dog case from yesterday was why didn't the new owner just offer to give the dog back to its old owner? Why give it to a shelter where they might put it to sleep?

I agreed that the old owner didn't have a case, but the new owner seemed a little sorry.

[BubblingKettle]

The thing I didn't understand about the dog case from yesterday was why didn't the new owner just offer to give the dog back to its old owner? Why give it to a shelter where they might put it to sleep?

 

Frankly, it was because the new owner was a moron and took an easy way out.

[AngelaHunter]

I felt a bit bad for them though. $230 a month for 20 months & the tv & washer & dryer still had a balance of $1600?!?

 

Maybe they bought via "Rent-to-Own" OR  they felt they needed the very tip- top of the line (We're talking $6200, right?) items.  Buy second hand or, if you have no credit, do it the old-fashioned and save up. Whatever their deal was, they;re mature people and they chose it.

[27bored]

Maybe they bought via "Rent-to-Own" OR they felt they needed the very tip- top of the line (We're talking $6200, right?) items. Buy second hand or, if you have no credit, do it the old-fashioned and save up. Whatever their deal was, they;re mature people and they chose it.

I agree. I don't know why people play house like that. At least if you move in with someone don't financially entangle with them beyond the rent. Getting stuff on credit with someone and sharing accounts and debt with someone is risky and not worth it.

[Milz]

I agree. I don't know why people play house like that. At least if you move in with someone don't financially entangle with them beyond the rent. Getting stuff on credit with someone and sharing accounts and debt with someone is risky and not worth it.

 

People do really crazy stuff. We have women who bring their boyfriend's children for doctor's appointments or women who make doctor's appointments for their boyfriend.  I think it was a recent JJ where the guy got upset because JJ said his girlfriend's children weren't his children and in the halterview, he said that the children call him "Daddy" or something like that.

[6 MeowMeowBeenz]

"I was broughten into custody."  "I was putten into jail."

 

Perhaps he was a German speaker and was using the Germanic form of verbs

 

nah...

[ItsHelloPattiagain]

 

Today we got a rerun of one of the most sordid, yet entertaining cases ever. Mr. Landy, Delusional Druggie and Dirty Old Man vs. Jami, The Overly Bleached Bimbo, sporting a thick primer of orange makeup and a snickering, disgusting husband in tow. 

Gah, that was horrible the first time and even more horrible the second time. What possesses these old men (and old ladies) to think they are going to get a sweet young thing without greasing their palms with an abundance of moolah? I assumed wrong that he would have been ashamed to air his dirty laundry on TV (which she was charging him to do - can't fault her on that one) 

 

I always wonder about the rent-to-own places - they charge a crapload of money so their customers can have the "latest and greatest" playthings. I wish they would teach some kind of money management in high school so that people realize how much that $16.99 per week is going to amount to when they get a laptop or washer and dryer paid off. 

[teebax]

I was just checking the news headlines when I came across this.  She's the current City State's Attorney of Baltimore, although at the time of this episode, she was a college student.  Enjoy.

 

ETA:  There's a difference between Mayor and City State's Attorney.

Nice find. I saw this on some website this morning and knew someone here would've posted it by now.

 

This episode is so old JJ let the plaintiff introduce hearsay and use the word "basically" over and over again.

 

BTW, I really shouldn't have read the comments below the clip. Some people are really horrid (behind the anonymity of their computer screens).

[iwasish]

People do really crazy stuff. We have women who bring their boyfriend's children for doctor's appointments or women who make doctor's appointments for their boyfriend. I think it was a recent JJ where the guy got upset because JJ said his girlfriend's children weren't his children and in the halterview, he said that the children call him "Daddy" or something like that.

Well that's nice, I'm sure they won't have any emotional problems when Daddy takes a hike. I always suspect having the kids call the bf or new hubby daddy is a way to bug the real dad. Passive aggressive.

Edited May 28, 2015 by iwasish

[Rick Kitchen]

The 18-year-old who was driving his mother's car and was suing the people who hit the car.  Wtf was that on his head?  Was he wearing a headband with his hair pulled back?

[Guest]

The 18-year-old who was driving his mother's car and was suing the people who hit the car.  Wtf was that on his head?  Was he wearing a headband with his hair pulled back?

Yes.  He was channeling his inner Tom Brady.

[AngelaHunter]

Yes.  He was channeling his inner Tom Brady.

 

Yes, that was some hairdo, but he seemed intelligent, polite and responsible. The defendants were positively disgusting in every way,even aside from their insurance that lapsed a month ago. 

[Ouisch]

As if Mayer Landy hadn't embarrassed himself enough during his testimony, did you catch his comment in the hallterview? "I'd ask her, 'Can I touch you?' and she'd say, "Yeah, for $60.'" 

 

(Maybe it's just me, but it seems extra-icky to me if an old lech actually asks permission to grope you, rather than just "accidentally" copping a feel. I've worked in offices since I was 16 years old and have many a lech pat my behind [just once, then they were sternly warned to never do so again!] or "unintentionally" brush against my breast while reaching for something; I think I would've run screaming if they'd asked in advance for the privilege.)

[Guest]

Yes, that was some hairdo, but he seemed intelligent, polite and responsible. The defendants were positively disgusting in every way,even aside from their insurance that lapsed a month ago. 

Absolutely.  He seems like a naturally adorable kid. 

 

I suspect there was a bit of intimidation there with Jabba and the polite kid.  In all seriousness how in the hell did that guy drive a car?  He had no legs!!  He couldn't walk without the crooked stick so how could he maneuver turns and such while driving.  I loved how he "just didn't pay" his insurance for a month and a half which in JJ speak means a couple of years.  JJ was supposed to accept that as a viable defense. 

 

And as for wifey - nice teeth or lack thereof.....Putty face seemed like the cleaner-upper (in probably more ways than one) to Jabba's messes. 

 

Absolutely adorable vs. Absolutely disgusting.  Thankfully JJ did not think that everything out of this teenager's mouth was a lie.

[AngelaHunter]

I suspect there was a bit of intimidation there with Jabba and the polite kid.

 

No kidding. He's a kid being faced with those two ogres. Sheesh! I'd be scared and I'm no kid. What insurance company would insure Jabba to drive anyway?

[NowVoyager]

I cracked up laughing & nodded my head today as JJ explained to a meddling babydaddy defendant why a grandmother might want to just take her teenage & older grandchildren out for a bite, but not the 4 year-old. Paraphrasing here: " Maybe I don't want to take them to the bathroom every 2 minutes & answer a million questions & cut up their food & hey, I'm old, maybe I want one who can drive me...." It wasn't anything to do with the case, but I thought maybe it helped resolve a family issue....Oh, wait. As I'm typing this, I remember the babydaddy's hallterview. Something about how things will never be the same. The plantiffs were ready to let the past go (then again, they won ). The bd was 56 I think. Way too old for this crap. But, hey, as JJ would say, she picked him.

[27bored]

I suspect there was a bit of intimidation there with Jabba and the polite kid.

 

Jabba and the Polite Kid? I think I saw them at Bonaroo last year. They were everything. /badjoke

 

But yeah, the kid seemed perfectly nice and polite, but dude needs to need change up that haircut. He's gonna look back on it in ten years and wonder what he was thinking.

 

The defendant seemed to have what my friend would lovingly call an FFRI (fat fuck related illness). They were wanting them to wait so they could get insurance and then have the plaintiff file a claim. Man, has your cholesterol gotten so bad that it's eating up your brain cells. Ain't nobody got time for that! He needs to start a GoFundMe to get gastric. I mean, he might wind up looking like Shang Tsung afterward, but hey he might be able to walk too!

[designing1]

 

But yeah, the kid seemed perfectly nice and polite, but dude needs to need change up that haircut. He's gonna look back on it in ten years and wonder what he was thinking.

 

I told myself that if he'd taken off the headband his hair would fall all over his face, and he didn't want to get keep getting chastised by JJ to push it back. That makes me more comfortable than thinking he would choose to wear his hair that way...or worse, choose to emulate Tom Brady.

Edited May 29, 2015 by designing1

[califred]

He has similar length hair to my son, not long enough for a pony tail but hanging in his face, the headband was probably so Judy could see him

[ItsHelloPattiagain]

 

I cracked up laughing & nodded my head today as JJ explained to a meddling babydaddy defendant why a grandmother might want to just take her teenage & older grandchildren out for a bite, but not the 4 year-old. Paraphrasing here: " Maybe I don't want to take them to the bathroom every 2 minutes & answer a million questions & cut up their food & hey, I'm old, maybe I want one who can drive me...."

I was nodding and laughing too! I have a 16 month old granddaughter. We went out to eat last week and that child was EVERYWHERE. She grabbed the man's hat behind our booth, she wrote all over her legs with a pen I gave her (why use the paper when legs will do?), she poked another patron in the leg to say hello and blew kisses to another random man after she plunged both hands into my salad. Maybe BabyDaddy was pissed he had to watch the kid while the ladies when out for brunch. 

 

I was actually impressed by Polite Kid. He looked clean and there were no fold lines in his shirt (don'cha love when they take the shirt right out of the package on the way to the taping?). I'm guessing he had that old Bieber hair that's all pushed forward over his face so perhaps Mom said "The Judge is going to want to see your face" and he took it seriously. More seriously than Jabba and his Minion who wanted to postdate the accident by buying insurance at The General for same day coverage ("You can print your own insurance card!")  

[magicdog]

 

I always suspect having the kids call the bf or new hubby daddy is a way to bug the real dad. Passive aggressive.

 

Sometimes, but not always.  I've talked to foster parents who have said many of the kids they take in have an innate desire for "mom" and "dad".  Often, they'll start out calling them [Mr. or Mrs. Smith] and if they're there a while will eventually start referring to them as "Mom" & "Dad" - especially if they've been missing one or both before being fostered.

[AngelaHunter]

The defendant seemed to have what my friend would lovingly call an FFRI (fat fuck related illness). They were wanting them to wait so they could get insurance and then have the plaintiff file a claim.

 

I guess there's no money  left over from snack time for insurance, or even some teefs for his wife, Alice the Goon.

[PopTart16]

I was nodding and laughing too! I have a 16 month old granddaughter. We went out to eat last week and that child was EVERYWHERE. She grabbed the man's hat behind our booth, she wrote all over her legs with a pen I gave her (why use the paper when legs will do?), she poked another patron in the leg to say hello and blew kisses to another random man after she plunged both hands into my salad. Maybe BabyDaddy was pissed he had to watch the kid while the ladies when out for brunch. 

 

I was actually impressed by Polite Kid. He looked clean and there were no fold lines in his shirt (don'cha love when they take the shirt right out of the package on the way to the taping?). I'm guessing he had that old Bieber hair that's all pushed forward over his face so perhaps Mom said "The Judge is going to want to see your face" and he took it seriously. More seriously than Jabba and his Minion who wanted to postdate the accident by buying insurance at The General for same day coverage ("You can print your own insurance card!")  

Let me just rant a bit about this. I work in insurance and it never stops amazing me when people try and pull this shit. They show up to make a payment on a lapsed policy and a day later report an accident. Sadly there are companies that never catch on and we all end up paying higher rates because of it. Gaaah!

[Brattinella]

 

Alice the Goon.

 

Seriously, you kill me!

[SandyToes]

Googly Eyes!  I found her, all my ownself! (Lhasa Apso vs. PIt Bulls and some Mercedes car flap.)   Although, watching the Mercedes case, it was hard to tell who was googlier - Googly Eyes, or the Plaintiff.

 

This whole episode would have also made a good "makeover" episode on Oprah. Between the Pit Bull owner/non-owner's teefs and momma's hair color, everyone could have used a tidying up.   I am so shallow.  It is good that I am so perfect that I can pass judgement on everyone else.  :-/