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Danielle and Mohamed: The Original Mess

Meredith Quill

By Meredith Quill
in The Couples (Spoilers)

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JocelynCavanaugh
JocelynCavanaugh

OMG. I forgot just how terribly Danielle speaks. Mohammed's English is actually better than hers, aside from the accent. And that sniveling, whiny crying she does whenever she talks to him... good Lor

Christina
Christina

Danielle had been with the father of her children for over twenty years. After he left her, her friend turned her on to online dating of foreigners, and Danielle was scammed by a few before Mohamed. O

Drogo
Drogo

Female passengers probably don't like it when the driver's like "That'll be $16, and also it would be great if I could move into your house and demand an appropriate amount of respect from you for doi

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CoachWristletJen

CoachWristletJen

(edited)
7 hours ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

IMG_0583.JPG

She told the interviewer that the Mohamed in "Dohar" ain't the same guy that walked off the plane. The affection was there, she said, and presumably, the cuddles?

And, this photo is evidence of the truth of her words.

She was practically fighting him off with a stick!

Danielle said, "Our first sahxual encounter was beautiful. I I took off all my clothes and Mo asked me, "They have mood altering drink in your country?" And I said, "Sure Mawhamet! You can buy it on every street corner! Any kind of drinks you want!" And then as he mounted me, he whispered into my ear, "Start talking to me about them."

Edited by CoachWristletJen
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Sprockets

Sprockets

20 hours ago, magemaud said:

I have been accused of extremely unstable behavior by all three which is not the case. How can they say that when they have never met me in person.

We haven't met you either, but you are certifiable.  And for God's sake learn basic English before you post again, Danielle.  You are functionally illiterate.  

1 hour ago, CoachWristletJen said:

And, this photo is evidence of the truth of her words.

The photo is evidence that he was being held hostage.  

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Nancypants

Nancypants

18 hours ago, magemaud said:

Had to chuckle at this photo from Danielle's fan page on FB with the caption, "They look happy, don't you agree?" Um, no, she looks like that smelly old lady you were forced to let kiss you as a child and he looks like he's holding his breath and can't wait for it to be over

Updated with my amateur attempt at adding a thought bubble: 

 

DanMo.jpg

Oh my god she's snacking on him! Ear cartilage must be a part of her. ...."weight lose journey" endquote..

Cannibalism alive and well in Sandusky!

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Nancypants

Nancypants

38 minutes ago, Sprockets said:

We haven't met you either, but you are certifiable.  And for God's sake learn basic English before you post again, Danielle.  You are functionally illiterate.  

I'm pretty sure they ain't got no punctuation standards at that Sandusky Kumyunitee Kollidge she goes to for her Nursin' Duhgree.

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Sprockets

Sprockets

50 minutes ago, Nancypants said:

I'm pretty sure they ain't got no punctuation standards at that Sandusky Kumyunitee Kollidge she goes to for her Nursin' Duhgree.

There were higher standards in my elementary school.  And isn't she doing this online?  

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Miss Chevious

Miss Chevious

Somebody's got to be helping her. My guess is Faith. We all know Danielle has the IQ of a doorknob and there's no way she'd be able to pass chemistry, anatomy etc. Those courses contain words with more than two syllables which, as we all know, is beyond her. 

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Nancypants

Nancypants

22 hours ago, funky-rat said:

I will be interested in seeing what her grades are when she can no longer take online classes.  A former co-worker of mine attended a local chain of "for profit" private "colleges".  We all warned her.  They encouraged her to max out her student loans every single semester to buy stuff from them (computers, etc).  We warned her that she'd have to pay that money back.  After a while, when she couldn't keep up with the work, she switched to online classes, and had people do some of the work for her.  She finally graduated, and she managed to find a job, but with the mileage she puts on daily, she's no better off than she was when she worked with me (although we're better off, because we no longer have to deal with her).  Most people that go there never find work, and end up with tons of loan debt.  A friend's co-worker has 2 certificates and 2 associate degrees from them because each time their lifetime job placement failed, they just told her she needed more schooling, and had her take more classes.  They shilled up everyone in that town, and moved to another one to shill more people.  I'm glad the school Danielle is going to is a branch of a major university, but I remain a bit skeptical about her grades, and who may be doing the work.

If this is the case then Daniell can Whinge and Snivel that her Kuhmyunity Kollige has done " Frauded" her. Then she can get to Suin' them.

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funky-rat

funky-rat

17 minutes ago, Sprockets said:

Certainly.  I'm not familiar with online classes.  Will Danielle ever have to take a supervised test in real time?  

When my co-worker was doing online classes at a somewhat scammy local for-profit thing, her tests were online as well.  But she did reach a point where she had to do classes in person.  She had a friend of hers write all of her English papers, and do some of her math.  And if Danielle is going for any type of medical thing, she WILL have to do some stuff in person.

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Arwen Evenstar

Arwen Evenstar

3 hours ago, Nancypants said:

Oh my god she's snacking on him! Ear cartilage must be a part of her. ...."weight lose journey" endquote..

Cannibalism alive and well in Sandusky!

It's just gross the way she pawed all over him. He should have at least had the sense to pick someone he could at least get it up for.  Obviously, Most women in their right mind with 4 kids aren't going to pick a guy almost the same age as her kids.  The poor woman has a most unfortunate face and figure, a nasty personality, and is as dumb as a sock.  Mo thought he'd picked an easy mark, but maybe the joke's on him. 

Now, she consoles herself with baloney cake.  She doesn't have to share it with Mahammit because it ain't hala meat.

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Nancypants

Nancypants

(edited)
26 minutes ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

You can see she's got monkey paws. Grimy, greasy, and sticky too.

IMG_0594.JPG

"I will cling to you for dear life with my tiny Carnie Hands!" (Carnies!... Small hands.. Smell like cabbage)

I can't tell if she is Grimacin' or Smilin'

Also, I have a sneaking suspicion that Muhmmit ain't the worst mistake of her life. Just a blip on the Radar of shitty decisions...

Edited by Nancypants
Saahks
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CoachWristletJen

CoachWristletJen

(edited)
7 hours ago, Sprockets said:

Certainly.  I'm not familiar with online classes.  Will Danielle ever have to take a supervised test in real time?  

She won't pass that basics of algebra test without cheating. That's a 6th grade class! (Or at least it was when my son took it.)

19 minutes ago, Nancypants said:

"I will cling to you for dear life with my tiny Carnie Hands!" (Carnies!... Small hands.. Smell like cabbage)

I can't tell if she is Grimacin' or Smilin'

Also, I have a sneaking suspicion that Muhmmit ain't the worst mistake of her life. Just a blip on the Radar of shitty decisions...

A little of both. She's resisting the urge to mount him, and she would have given in if he hadn't made her leave.

Right there. In the doorway. Striped skirt flying up in the breeze. Mo rolling his eyes and thinking, Not again.

"I need help from the camera crew! Lift her off of me before she wets!"

(I'm so mean.)

It's not her fault. He smells sooo good! (Meaning not like cat urine.)

Edited by CoachWristletJen
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Nancypants

Nancypants

(edited)
12 hours ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

Yeah, I imagine her hands smell like pork and cabbage, but more on the cabbagey side.

He didn't like her cats and when it came to sex, it was Ramadan all day, every day.

Just goes to prove that Mahammit don't like pussy!

Acceptable?

IMG_0591.JPG

Here I am burnin'16 Kahlereez! Now I m slim let's have Saahks..Seein' as I'm So Saahksee! Muhummit sez I'm ACCEPTABLE!

Edited by Nancypants
Saahks
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magemaud

magemaud

(edited)
38 minutes ago, AZChristian said:
50 minutes ago, magemaud said:

What a terrible/great picture! Where do you think she is? Obviously somewhere with bright overhead lights and...spray bottles?
 

Looks like purple Planet Fitness gym equipment over her shoulder.

Thanks, I was going to guess a gym, (especially because of her headband) but in some ways it resembled a TV studio. Maybe it when she was still getting a makeover show. Oh wait, could that be the "16 Calorie Workout" treadmill in the background? 

Edited by magemaud
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Arwen Evenstar

Arwen Evenstar

4 hours ago, Kareem said:

Maybe he thought she was a Sheriff.  

Sheriff Hopalong Derp?

That could have been the start of Mahammit's law enforcement fetish. He called the police every time for every little thing.  Takin' his hala meat money? How dare she? 

Ah, Angie, she of the Halal Potatoes fame!

 

IMG_0586.JPG

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Arwen Evenstar

Arwen Evenstar

I'm loving the Mahammit memes that I can't find on my iPad.  Since my participation in Soshul Meedya is minimal, I don't expect to have access to all the goodies.

 

Damn, if I were Danielle, I would want to crawl under a rock right about now.  She's just pitiful.  I feel bad sometimes snarking on her because I'm convinced she's several slices shy of a loaf.

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Arwen Evenstar

Arwen Evenstar

50 minutes ago, SoshulMeedya said:

I just do a Google image search for "Danielle and Mohamed". It's a gold mine, lol. 

I was reading Danielle's Twitter last night. She's not as dumb or vulnerable as she seems on tv.

From what I've read of her SM postings, I would definitely agree with you.

You could be the nicest person in the world and this show would portray you as an asshat .  You could be a Rhodes scholar and be portrayed as dumb as a sock. 

Both she and Mo and any other couple for that matter are portrayed, scripted, and edited as TLC sees fit. We can only guess what's on the cutting room floor.

I wonder if she and Mahammit knock down a few drinks together and laugh about how they got one over on all of us.  Maybe they are BFFs IRL.  Doubtful, as the hate and rage between these two is all too real.

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AZChristian

AZChristian

4 hours ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

Damn, if I were Danielle, I would want to crawl under a rock right about now.  She's just pitiful.  I feel bad sometimes snarking on her because I'm convinced she's several slices shy of a loaf.

Here in Arizona, we phrase it this way:  She's a taco short of a combination platter.

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greekmom

greekmom

21 hours ago, SoshulMeedya said:

I just do a Google image search for "Danielle and Mohamed". It's a gold mine, lol. 

I was reading Danielle's Twitter last night. She's not as dumb or vulnerable as she seems on tv.

Not as vulnerable I totally agree with you.  Not so dumb.... care to elaborate? 

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