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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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Kids DO have pool parties and parents aren’t always going to be there.  I was invited to one when I was 10 for another kid’s 11th.  Didn’t go because a:  I never learned how (Epilepsy plus chronic eczema) and b: I had piano anyway.  Both the birthday girl’s parents were there plus a life guard. Plus there were only maybe eight kids.  I guess that made a difference.  

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(edited)

@PRgal There is a difference between a public and private pool of course. I was near a lake, and didn't see a pool until I was a teen. We all learned to swim at a young age.

My peeve is people ignoring beach signs.

Edited by nokat
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22 minutes ago, nokat said:

@PRgal There is a difference between a public and private pool of course. I was near a lake, and didn't see a pool until I was a teen. We all learned to swim at a young age.

My peeve is people ignoring beach signs.

I didn’t grow up near the water.  Everyone learned to swim in a pool, either community or at a private club (or a backyard pool before they started lessons in a community/club pool).  In private schools with on-campus pools, kids have pool periods as young as kindergarten. 

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Even with a lifeguard, bad things can happen. I was at a birthday party being celebrated at a country club pool. This was the year before I finally learned how to swim. I was the only kid in the shallow end and was playing in the water when I lost my footing. I was small for my age & just couldn't get my foot to the bottom of the pool. There were moms sitting all around, chatting with each other. Finally, I felt one of the steps and climbed out. "Somebody up there" must've been looking out for me that day. No one knew what was happening to me. My cousin taught me how to float the next summer at our club pool & I taught myself the rest (I just wasn't good at swimming lessons so I needed to teach myself by copying the other kids). So even if it looks like kids are playing in the water...you never know who might be struggling to regain control.

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I can't remember where I saw it (NV or GA) but there was a pretty big marketing campaign for adult survival swim classes. As in we'll teach you how to not panic, how to tread water, float, roll over, all the basics that are taught to kids. 

Adults who don't have the basic tools to not panic, roll over, float, etc... have a higher risk of drowning. 

Come to think of it, it may have been in GA where adults frequently drown in Lake Lanier, for a variety of reasons.

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My eczema doesn’t flare up like it did when I was a kid and my seizures are under control, but I’m too ashamed to register for lessons as a beginner. People with my upbringing all know how, except me.  I just don’t want people to find me weird. 

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40 minutes ago, PRgal said:

My eczema doesn’t flare up like it did when I was a kid and my seizures are under control, but I’m too ashamed to register for lessons as a beginner. People with my upbringing all know how, except me.  I just don’t want people to find me weird. 

Never feel ashamed. I know there is a lot of baggage in your background, but whatever helps you enjoy life, please do. I have to tell this to myself frequently.

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52 minutes ago, PRgal said:

My eczema doesn’t flare up like it did when I was a kid and my seizures are under control, but I’m too ashamed to register for lessons as a beginner. People with my upbringing all know how, except me.  I just don’t want people to find me weird. 

Responding in chit-chat.

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1 hour ago, PRgal said:

My eczema doesn’t flare up like it did when I was a kid and my seizures are under control, but I’m too ashamed to register for lessons as a beginner. People with my upbringing all know how, except me.  I just don’t want people to find me weird. 

But your son knows how, right?

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7 hours ago, PRgal said:

Kids DO have pool parties and parents aren’t always going to be there.  I was invited to one when I was 10 for another kid’s 11th.  Didn’t go because a:  I never learned how (Epilepsy plus chronic eczema) and b: I had piano anyway.  Both the birthday girl’s parents were there plus a life guard. Plus there were only maybe eight kids.  I guess that made a difference.  

this is a campground pool.  the rule is kids under 16 must be accompanied by an adult.  You need a code to get in.  parents will send their kids, sometimes as young as 7, to the pool with the code. there may be tons of people there, there may be none.  there may be just me, when is when I hate it.  I feel responsible for the safety of complete strangers.  And, no, i don't work there.

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2 hours ago, PRgal said:

My eczema doesn’t flare up like it did when I was a kid and my seizures are under control, but I’m too ashamed to register for lessons as a beginner. People with my upbringing all know how, except me.  I just don’t want people to find me weird. 

Can you get someone to teach you (in the shallow end) how to do the Dead Man's Float? Once you know how to do that and realize, "Yes! I'm floating! I can do this!"...then you can watch others, see how they're propelling themselves through the water. Get the nose clip (or whatever it's called) so you don't have to hold your nose. And learn how to tread water. You're young...you can do this 🤗.

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34 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

Can you get someone to teach you (in the shallow end) how to do the Dead Man's Float? Once you know how to do that and realize, "Yes! I'm floating! I can do this!"...then you can watch others, see how they're propelling themselves through the water. Get the nose clip (or whatever it's called) so you don't have to hold your nose. And learn how to tread water. You're young...you can do this 🤗.

I suppose.  I'll need goggles too.  I'm really nearsighted!!!

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44 minutes ago, PRgal said:

I suppose.  I'll need goggles too.  I'm really nearsighted!!!

People who do laps may run into you! I certainly hope you feel more comfortable in water.

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2 hours ago, PRgal said:

I suppose.  I'll need goggles too.  I'm really nearsighted!!!

No big deal. Wear them, wear the nose clip, and learn to float. Your biggest mission is to find that wonderful person who will have the *patience* to stand in the shallow end with you, & get you to float 😊

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It's July 24th and the back to school commercials have already started.  Come on!  Is there a child in this world who is pushing mom or dad to take them back to school shopping 5-6 weeks before school starts up again?  If there is that child is not related to me.

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46 minutes ago, Laura Holt said:

It's July 24th and the back to school commercials have already started.  Come on!  Is there a child in this world who is pushing mom or dad to take them back to school shopping 5-6 weeks before school starts up again?  If there is that child is not related to me.

Some schools start in August (especially in the southern part of the US. But then, they get out in May.  
 

I got my son’s new school uniform in June, since we have to purchase online and it can take up to 6-8 weeks for it to ship (way too long, IMHO).  

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43 minutes ago, PRgal said:

Some schools start in August (especially in the southern part of the US. But then, they get out in May.  

I thought of that, but these are local commercials and schools here go back in September (I think the French board does go back in August but it's the last week of August).  I haven't been in school myself for awhile now! but I still shudder at the idea of going back to school in August - and I liked school!

 

Edited by Laura Holt
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33 minutes ago, Laura Holt said:

I thought of that, but these are local commercials and schools here go back in September (I think the French board does go back in August but it's the last week of August).  I haven't been in school myself for awhile now! but I still shudder at the idea of going back to school in August - and I liked school!

 

I didn't know that schools in some French board schools (one?) went back earlier until last year when an acquaintance posted a first day pic of her son.  We go back the day after Labour Day or some time that week, depending on whether you're public/separate or private (they often start Wednesday or Thursday, whether the school has boarding or not).  My acquaintance and her family lives in the Ottawa area.  I guess they're just looking at getting money!  

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22 hours ago, theredhead77 said:

I can't remember where I saw it (NV or GA) but there was a pretty big marketing campaign for adult survival swim classes. As in we'll teach you how to not panic, how to tread water, float, roll over, all the basics that are taught to kids. 

Adults who don't have the basic tools to not panic, roll over, float, etc... have a higher risk of drowning. 

Come to think of it, it may have been in GA where adults frequently drown in Lake Lanier, for a variety of reasons.

#1 being dumb enough to actually swim in Lake Lanier.  

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5 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

Am I the only one who thought the flame icon meant an irate reaction? 🥴 Just looked it up. Oh well. And the mindblown icon seems to have a humorous meaning. Interesting.

I use the flame one because we don't have an angry one.

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13 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

I use the flame one because we don't have an angry one.

I thought it meant you just are angry. Yeah, we aren't supposed to show anger here. There aren't the icons that explain exactly what you want to say.

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On 7/21/2023 at 5:26 PM, StatisticalOutlier said:

I feel the same way about police and firefighters.  Last time I checked, they get paid, and nobody forced them to go into that profession.  Yes, it's dangerous, but so is working in a slaughterhouse or a cobalt mine and nobody thanks them

I'm probably going to take heat with this one but, for me, this applies to teachers. You chose the profession, you went to school for it, you did at least a year as a student teacher, probably a few as a long term sub as well. So please quit whining about how you are underpaid and underappreciated. You knew what the salary was going in, you were aware of what the job entailed and you MUST know that your pay and your school system is taxpayer-funded. 

Teachers are no more of a hero than any other profession that deals with the public, please don't expect me to bow down in deference to you. 

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24 minutes ago, KittyMom4 said:

Teachers are no more of a hero than any other profession that deals with the public, please don't expect me to bow down in deference to you. 

You won't get heat from me, but a few teachers helped shape my life. Yes, some jobs we choose, but can we not diss them?

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@nokat, not dissing anyone, just pointing out that I do not worship teachers just because they chose to be a teacher. I'm sure we all, in some way, were shaped by them, however, I felt I got way more life experience and interpersonal skills during my time in the USMC than in school. I chose to go into the military, I learned quite a bit but I don't expect to be thanked or given hero status because of my time served. 

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51 minutes ago, KittyMom4 said:

I'm probably going to take heat with this one but, for me, this applies to teachers. You chose the profession, you went to school for it, you did at least a year as a student teacher, probably a few as a long term sub as well. So please quit whining about how you are underpaid and underappreciated. You knew what the salary was going in, you were aware of what the job entailed and you MUST know that your pay and your school system is taxpayer-funded. 

Teachers are no more of a hero than any other profession that deals with the public, please don't expect me to bow down in deference to you. 

I will see your heat and have added flames for this one. Waiters and waitresses can just leave me out of their wage issues. I leave 10% and once that gets to a dollar, a dollar is what I leave. Work out your pay with your employer/IRS. If it becomes a standard then it isn't a tip anymore it's a mandatory fee and just tell me what it will cost at the beginning of the meal to get served so I can eat and leave. 

eta @KittyMom4 I don't think your post is a dismissal of teachers. 

Edited by stewedsquash
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(edited)
9 minutes ago, stewedsquash said:

I will see your heat and have added flames for this one. Waiters and waitresses can just leave me out of their wage issues. I leave 10% and once that gets to a dollar, a dollar is what I leave.

Where are you eating that 10% is anywhere close to a dollar??  Nowhere near where I live that's for sure!  My pet peeve is restaurant prices right now.  I totally get that prices for groceries, gas, etc have all gone up and will get passed on to the consumer - but there's mark up and then there's come on, people, seriously????   Had breakfast out  at a mom and pop place near the place we visit every summer and an egg/bacon/toast and coffee that went for $6.99 last year is going for $15.99.  That's insane.  

Edited by Laura Holt
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16 minutes ago, Laura Holt said:

I totally get that prices for groceries, gas, etc have all gone up and will get passed on to the consumer - but there's mark up and then there's come on, people, seriously????

And the quality of food in restaurants have went down.  At least in my area.  I don't know if they are using cheaper ingredients or it's because they are shorthanded but nothing tastes good anymore. And this is restaurants I have been going to for years.

 

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1 minute ago, bluegirl147 said:

And the quality of food in restaurants have went down. 

We got out of the habit of eating out during the pandemic (like lots of others) and I don't know if it's the quality of the food or not but we've gotten really picky about where we're prepared to go now.  I'm no Julia Child but if I can cook it better why would I go out and pay someone else to serve me an inferior meal??   So restaurants are serving smaller portions (which isn't all that bad an idea), poorer quality, and they are charging, in some cases, more than twice as much.  Seems like a pretty bad business plan to me!

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6 minutes ago, Laura Holt said:

So restaurants are serving smaller portions (which isn't all that bad an idea), poorer quality, and they are charging, in some cases, more than twice as much. 

I know someone who had been going to a particular Chinese restaurant for years. She went and ordered some chicken dish for take out. Something she had ordered many times before.  She got home and the "chicken" was just the breading.  No chicken.  She called the restaurant and they said they couldn't explain why that happened and basically said there was nothing they could do.

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21 minutes ago, bluegirl147 said:

I know someone who had been going to a particular Chinese restaurant for years. She went and ordered some chicken dish for take out. Something she had ordered many times before.  She got home and the "chicken" was just the breading.  No chicken.  She called the restaurant and they said they couldn't explain why that happened and basically said there was nothing they could do.

A restaurant we order frequently from not only upped their prices, but their omelettes are frequently over-cooked/made diner style (i.e. there's crust.  I like my omelettes fluffy).  Also, I ordered avocado toast from another restaurant and they topped it with two over medium eggs.  I expect avocado toast to have "jammy" (i.e. soft boiled) or poached eggs.  Or maybe hard boiled.  If they say they're going to do over medium, they should state that on the menu. 

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52 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

I spent $54 at Olive Garden for myself alone. First time I visited that chain. Too expensive and the food wasn’t that great either.

Prices can depend on location.  If you went to one in touristy area, then prices will be inflated.  At McDonald’s, prices for the same sized Chicken McNuggets can vary by almost $5 in the same city (at least in Canada)!

https://www.cbc.ca/amp/1.6891476

 

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Do NOT get me started on tipping.  Seriously.  If you care about my mental health, do NOT get me started on tipping.  People don't even think about tipping McDonald's employees, and even if they did, the employees can't accept them.  Starbucks employees aren't paid "tipped" wages of like $2 an hour that anticipate tips--everything customers voluntarily pay just goes to Starbucks' bottom line. 

And don't forget how Door Dash got caught using customers' tips to fulfill Door Dash's minimum pay commitment to the drivers--if Door Dash was going to have to pay $5 to a driver but its fee structure has resulted in having only $3 going to the driver and Door Dash having to come up with $2 out of its own pocket, if the customer gave a $1 tip, the driver wouldn't get any "extra"--the only result was that instead of Door Dash having to come up with $2 to meet its obligation, it had to come up with $1.  The driver gets the guaranteed $5, with Door Dash paying $4 and the customer paying $1, not $5 plus the customer's $1 tip. 

A while back I ran across this brew pub's discussion of tipping and why they "made the decision to convert to a 100% tip-free culture in the taproom."  Tipping is racist, sexist, classist, and doesn't even ensure good service. 

https://www.switchyardbrewing.com/tipping-policy/

It made such an impression that I told Mr. Outlier that if we're ever in Bloomington, Indiana, I want to go there just to support them.  Well, we were in Bloomington, Indiana, a few months ago.  (It's a surprisingly nice town--the home of Indiana University and the film Breaking Away.)

So we go to Switchyard Brewing and order a couple of beers and insert the credit card in the machine and...we get that god damn tip screen.  I guess that's what they mean at the end of their page about tipping that "the option will still be there, because we know, some habits are hard to break."

I guess I thought that meant if you gave a tip they wouldn't throw it back at you.  Suffice to say I was rather disappointed that this "no tipping culture" establishment's tip screen looked exactly like the one at every other business that uses that interface.

3 hours ago, stewedsquash said:

Work out your pay with your employer/IRS

Actually, they have.  True "tipped workers" make less than minimum wage, with tips expected to make up any shortfall below minimum wage.  With that in mind, if you go to a table service restaurant with tipped workers, tips are expected as part of the wage scheme.  So if I go to one, I tip as expected.

But I bristle at supporting the tipping industry, so I've almost entirely quit going to anywhere but counter-service places, where the "tip" screen is annoying but I can with good conscience check "no tip" because I believe people's pay should be the employer's responsibility, not mine.  And definitely not left to the whims of people (especially given my dim view of people).

The only thing that keeps me from going ballistic on this whole thing is knowing that as long as dupes keep tipping "regular" employees and nothing changes because of it, they're voluntarily subsidizing every purchase I make.

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18 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Starbucks employees aren't paid "tipped" wages of like $2 an hour that anticipate tips--everything customers voluntarily pay just goes to Starbucks' bottom line. 

Not telling you to not be peeved about tipping culture but Starbucks tips are accounted for, split based on hours, taxed, and paid to employees. 

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3 hours ago, Laura Holt said:

Where are you eating that 10% is anywhere close to a dollar??  Nowhere near where I live that's for sure!  My pet peeve is restaurant prices right now.  I totally get that prices for groceries, gas, etc have all gone up and will get passed on to the consumer - but there's mark up and then there's come on, people, seriously????   Had breakfast out  at a mom and pop place near the place we visit every summer and an egg/bacon/toast and coffee that went for $6.99 last year is going for $15.99.  That's insane.  

Seriously where can I buy food in a restaurant for $1? Back in 1964?

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1 hour ago, oliviabenson said:

I spent $54 at Olive Garden for myself alone. First time I visited that chain. Too expensive and the food wasn’t that great either.

What the heck did you order?   That seems insane for one person.  The first time I ever went to Olive Garden was when my family dropped my brother off at college, their tomato sauce was way too sweet for for me, yuck!    I try to avoid Olive Garden at all costs.  

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3 hours ago, KittyMom4 said:

@nokat, not dissing anyone, just pointing out that I do not worship teachers just because they chose to be a teacher. I'm sure we all, in some way, were shaped by them, however, I felt I got way more life experience and interpersonal skills during my time in the USMC than in school. I chose to go into the military, I learned quite a bit but I don't expect to be thanked or given hero status because of my time served. 

When I got my new licence, they asked if I wanted it to say veteran.  Some people like it, and I don't.

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3 minutes ago, partofme said:

What the heck did you order?   That seems insane for one person.  The first time I ever went to Olive Garden was when my family dropped my brother off at college, their tomato sauce was way too sweet for for me, yuck!    I try to avoid Olive Garden at all costs.  

An appetizer, an entree and dessert. 

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22 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

 

9616209C-A19F-4CC6-8136-35B9A7C19AC3.jpeg

People are acting shocked. Food prices are so high now.

The meal looks great.

 

Edited by nokat
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19 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

 

9616209C-A19F-4CC6-8136-35B9A7C19AC3.jpeg

910C57B5-2220-4797-AEDD-42648556FA09.jpeg

BF8A28D8-C6A8-4758-AE8C-587369475EC0.jpeg

2B4091CC-3A35-47D9-B892-4908DCB59C8F.jpeg

 

I was asking what you ordered but thank you for the photos. I actually went to the OG website and it looks like

Fried mozzarella

Chicken and gnocchi soup

I can't find a mushroom pasta. Mind sharing what specifically that is?

Tiramisu 

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4 hours ago, stewedsquash said:

Waiters and waitresses can just leave me out of their wage issues. I leave 10% and once that gets to a dollar, a dollar is what I leave. Work out your pay with your employer/IRS. If it becomes a standard then it isn't a tip anymore it's a mandatory fee and just tell me what it will cost at the beginning of the meal to get served so I can eat and leave.

 

4 hours ago, Laura Holt said:

Where are you eating that 10% is anywhere close to a dollar??  Nowhere near where I live that's for sure!

 

55 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

True "tipped workers" make less than minimum wage, with tips expected to make up any shortfall below minimum wage.  With that in mind, if you go to a table service restaurant with tipped workers, tips are expected as part of the wage scheme.  So if I go to one, I tip as expected.

I didn't want to get involved in this, but I can't help it...

I think the poster who brought this up is saying, if a 10% tip is over $1.00, then $1.00 is all they'll leave (so, it would be 10% on a $10.00 check, which might still be possible in a diner breakfast or lunch situation, but never more than that).

But like it or not, the tips are baked into the current situation for servers in restaurants, so if you don't think that's fair, maybe it's better to avoid those establishments rather than cut into the take-home pay of servers who probably don't have a whole lot of bargaining power right here right now.

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7 minutes ago, theredhead77 said:

I was asking what you ordered but thank you for the photos. I actually went to the OG website and it looks like

Fried mozzarella

Chicken and gnocchi soup

I can't find a mushroom pasta. Mind sharing what specifically that is?

Tiramisu 

Oops it was:

fried mozzarella (was delicious)

chicken and gnocchi soup (very little chicken)

chicken Marsala (it was awful)

tiramisu (was delicious)

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57 minutes ago, SoMuchTV said:

But like it or not, the tips are baked into the current situation for servers in restaurants, so if you don't think that's fair, maybe it's better to avoid those establishments rather than cut into the take-home pay of servers who probably don't have a whole lot of bargaining power right here right now.

And who rely on this money to survive. A 10% tip is insulting. If service is bad enough to leave a crap tip (10% or less), a conversation with a manager is warranted. 

In my experience as a food service worker, the crappiest tippers were the most demanding. The most generous tippers were people who rolled with it and / or worked in food service.

Edited by theredhead77
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(edited)
37 minutes ago, theredhead77 said:

And who rely on this money to survive. A 10% tip is insulting. If service is bad enough to leave a crap tip (10% or less), a conversation with a manager is warranted. 

In my experience as a food service worker, the crappiest tippers were the most demanding. The most generous tippers were people who rolled with it and / or worked in food service.

Yeah, I’m not a big fan of the way things work now with tipped wages, but if one has a serious problem with it, I think the moral high ground is to avoid restaurants that rely on it, rather than frequenting them and contributing to underpaying the staff. 

Edited by SoMuchTV
Fine tuning my rhetoric
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4 minutes ago, SoMuchTV said:

Yeah, I’m not a big fan of the way things work now with tipped wages, but if one has a serious problem with it, I think the moral solution is to avoid restaurants that rely on it, rather than frequenting them and contributing to underpaying the staff. 

Agreed. I also know the tipping option on POS systems is built into the software. While I'm sure it can be disabled I suspect managers don't care to disable it.

Something worth mentioning is that tips on those POS systems may not make it to the employees. Speaking from experience back in the day (Baskin Robbins) the owner of our store didn't understand he was supposed to cash out the tips left on CCs and give them to us.

I always ask the person helping if they get the tips left on a CC.

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