Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[Maharincess]

Bilgistic (you're nothing less to me than a bilgistic pile of love mean), I think its great when people want to research their family tree but I agree with the previous poster, I don't want to hear about it.

I have a friend like the above poster who tells me every little thing she finds. Her living family members are all assholes so why would I care about the dead ones.

That's why I just do not understand the show Who Do You Think You Are? Why would I give a crap about some d list actor's family tree?

Karate Kate, I so agree about the TV spoilers on Facebook. I saw a lot of this after the newest Grey's Anatomy. People on a post about Grey's Anatomy the day after it aired were whining about people posting spoilers.

Edited April 25, 2015 by Maharincess

[Quof]

OR...as has happened TWICE at the same store, kids hanging off the side of overflowing grocery carts turn them sideways atop themselves. What's a little brain damage among neighbors? Tomorrow's headline: Kid Killers! Grocer Bagged for Busted Buggies

 

Many years ago, a co-worker's toddler nephew was standing up in the basket of a grocery cart, while his older brother pushed.  The toddler leaned too far toward the end, he fell out, hit his head and died.  I will never forget it, and I tell that story to every parent I see pushing a cart with a child standing in it.   I get mostly dirty looks, but an occasional "thank you".  I won't stop doing it.

Edited April 25, 2015 by Quof

[Betweenyouandme]

Many years ago, a co-worker's toddler nephew was standing up in the basket of a grocery cart, while his older brother pushed. The toddler leaned too far toward the end, he fell out, hit his head and died. I will never forget it, and I tell that story to every parent I see pushing a cart with a child standing in it. I get mostly dirty looks, but an occasional "thank you". I won't stop doing it.

Yeah. You should! I had a Voss fall out and bust wide open that was set it the corner of my cart on the way to my car. If a little water is able to fly out and hit the road that hard, a kid surely can as well.

I'm getting nervous about this baby! I have a fair amount of experience with kids but I definitely prefer the subdued ones! I hope this one isn't wild like a bat out of hell. Well...it's just me and my cat. Maybe the child can settle down with us and be sweet.

There are very few topics I want to hear someone talk about all of the time when we're together. But, I also know I'm not very interesting, so I try not to be too hard on others. I get more aggravated by someone who likes to text me every day just to chat, especially if it's a guy who is interested. I dislike that. Either text me something interesting or for plans to meet up. I hate endless text chats about nothing.

Whats a nice way to say that I hate text chats about nothing to someone?

[FormerMod-a1]

...I get more aggravated by someone who likes to text me every day just to chat, especially if it's a guy who is interested. I dislike that. Either text me something interesting or for plans to meet up. I hate endless text chats about nothing.

Whats a nice way to say that I hate text chats about nothing to someone?

 

I hear you on this one!  I get this all the time when I do online dating.  They'll say something like "let's start texting" and I always wonder how is texting an easier way to get to know someone.  I even asked that once and they guy never replied.  He totally stopped all communication even.  And the few times I've said OK, they get mad when I can't reply right away even when they know I work a 8-5/M-F job and they are texting during the day.  Who can sit around texting all day at work?  And is it really urgent that I reply to your "Hi." w/in 2 minutes?  At least it's been a good way to weed out a bunch of morons and not bother meeting them and/or dating them.  ;-P  But it is annoying that it happens so often.

[Betweenyouandme]

That's the darn truth. It's really bad when they start asking for "more pictures." What are you, a collector? I have about nine pictures on my profile that are clear and show my face and clothed body. While all they have is one hard to see picture or one with some girl cropped out.

I hate online dating. I've got more messages ever now that I'm pregnant... by very pushy people. I give up. My account should run out in a couple months anyway.

[Betweenyouandme]

My mother signed me up for that site somehow. I very much dislike it. I kept unsubscribing from emails and getting more that people were searching for me. I don't really care about my address being up there. It's just that I don't want to know if people are looking for me. Why are they? Lol. My info isn't even correct but heck if I'm fixing it. Finally, the emails have stopped, or they go to the junk folder at least.

[bilgistic]

I don't talk to people about genealogy. I might drop a sentence like, "I did some genealogy and found I'm an at least eighth-generation North Carolinian." Or, "My reasearch led me to find I'm fifth cousins with Marginally Famous Person." I only talk about it in more depth with my family, and only if they ask, but I'm like that with most things, as a natural loner and introvert.

[bilgistic]

Re: parking annoyances...I have a couple...

1) If you drive a non-compact vehicle, do not park in a space marked "COMPACT". I will leave a sticky note on your window. It will read "NOT COMPACT!" I should not have to crawl out of the window of my Civic because you think you can park your Tahoe anywhere.

2) Parking for expectant mothers or parents with small children. I'm on record as not being a fan of kids; I'll expand that to include pregnancy--JMO. Your choice to reproduce does not entitle you to a special parking spot. My mother managed to park wherever on her own with three girls aged five and under, so you can do it, too. I should start parking in expectant mother parking. I've been asked when I was "due" by some assholes because of my gut. I mean, is the grocery store going to make me pee on a stick to check? (I would not actually park in expectant mother parking.)

Veteran parking--While I'm anti-war, I'm all for vets having reserved spaces. If you served for our country, you deserve some perks, because in general, the U.S. treats you pretty shabbily.

[Quof]

Our local shopping malls now have (1) Handicapped parking; (2) Senior parking; (3) Pregnant and new mother parking; and (4) Hybrid parking. They practically outnumber the regular spots.   A retired physician once said to me, upon seeing the handicapped spots "I didn't have that many cripples in my entire practice".

[bilgistic]

A retired physician once said to me, upon seeing the handicapped spots "I didn't have that many cripples in my entire practice".

Yes. I went to a Kmart once that had a ridiculous number of handicapped spots. I'm certainly not anti-handicapped spots, but I did say to myself, "There aren't that many handicapped people in the world!"

It's pretty widely known that non-handicapped family members of the handicapped use their placards. My parents did it after my stepdad's mother died, using her placard. I gave them side-eye.

I'm a little concerned that your doctor used the word "cripples". Is he in his 80s?

[Quof]

As a matter of fact, he is.  As I mentioned "retired".

[backformore]

 

For another example, I dislike kids except for a couple to whom I'm related. Now to the crux of my post: I go to Trader Joe's and kids are running around like it's recess and the whole store is the playground. Parents are who-knows-where, and I'm literally being faceplanted in the thigh by a toddler or I'm tripping over an elementary schooler rounding the corner at breakneck speed.

OR...as has happened TWICE at the same store, kids hanging off the side of overflowing grocery carts turn them sideways atop themselves. What's a little brain damage among neighbors? Tomorrow's headline: Kid Killers! Grocer Bagged for Busted Buggies

Yikes!  What is it about Trader Joes?  Is it the store for "free range parenting" now?  A TJ opened up near me just recently.   My first time there - I enter, pushing a shopping cart, and this little kid pushing a kid-size cart, slams his cart into mine, I never saw him coming, because he was IN the store, and I was entering.  He wasnt' leaving, just pushing his cart around as fast as he could go, in front of people entering the store, while his mom looked at the flower display.    A few minutes later, two more kids are chasing each other  around the store, running down the aisles, veering around the corners, jumping out at each other.  

 

Leaving the store, backing out of a parking lot, I notice at the last second, one of those same kids running behind my car.   I stopped, got out, looked right at the mom and said "HOLD HIS HAND IN THE PARKING LOT!"  

 

And THAT is one of my pet peeves.  If you want to be the kind of parent that leaves it up to chance, lets your kid climb, run, etc.  go ahead.  I'm not telling you how to parent.  If your kid falls out of a cart, knocks stuff over, whatever - that's on you.   But how dare you let him run around a parking lot where I might accidentally back over him because I can't see or anticipate  a person under 3 feet tall person running behind or in front of my car. Don't let him run ahead, don't let him put the cart in the corral and run back to your car.  HOLD HIS HAND from when you leave the store until you get him in your car.  

 

If your kid is going to die because of your negligence, don't involve anyone else.  

[backformore]

Is it my mouse, or what/  everything I post, posts twice.  

Edited April 26, 2015 by backformore

[bilgistic]

Yeah, it's a tragedy when a kid gets snatched up, but many parents now let their kids run around stores and restaurants like chickens with their heads cut off. I was in Off Broadway Shoes and a kid no older than four was alternately running the aisles and rolling on the floor. His mother and grandmother were in the back of the store, oblivious. He could've easily been taken.

I SO BADLY want to take these kids by the arms and walk them around the store until we find their parents, but I'm sure *I* would get sued or arrested for "battery" or something equally crazy.

I was talking to my boss about this, and he said, "Well, it's a lot harder than you think." He and his wife have a 3YO boy and a newborn girl. I don't doubt it's "hard", but I don't think it's impossible to hold your kid's hand while you're in a store. Or don't go to the store. Or get a teenager to watch your kid. Or use a leash. Maybe it's not popular, but my mother did it. We knew how to behave in stores b/c she told us how and expected us to or there were consequences. Mom wasn't our friend; she was our mother.

[Quof]

I was once riding down an escalator behind a woman with a baby and a toddler.  She was holding the baby, with the toddler 2 or 3 steps behind her, and she was looking straight ahead. The toddler decided to sit down.  We were approaching the bottom, and I could see the "teeth" of the escalator.  My hands were full, but I managed to grab the hood of his jacket and pull him upright.   He had mittens on strings hanging from his sleeves, and they got caught in the "teeth".  He started to cry, the mother finally turned around, and I said "That could have been the seat of his pants, you nitwit."  She seemed unfazed. 

[tribeca]

Sometimes I feel like I just have way too many Pet Peeves.  

People who ask personal questions & then don't let it go when you say you don't want to answer the question it's private.  The most annoying "What's the big deal?  I would tell you"

  Honestly, I love keeping up with people on facebook but there are some people I wanted out of my life for a reason.  Facebook makes that difficult. 

   Facebook sometimes makes me sad.  I know being married and having kids isn't everything.  Just it's something I wanted in life that didn't happen.  Seeing everyone's happiness just makes me sad.  Know that sounds bad. 

  Music related.  Why is it when you go to see a singer/band you like people have to inform you ... "his gay" "one from the band is on drugs?"  I just want to hear them sing and be entertained.

[DeLurker]

Sometimes I feel like I just have way too many Pet Peeves.  

People who ask personal questions & then don't let it go when you say you don't want to answer the question it's private.  The most annoying "What's the big deal?  I would tell you"

  Honestly, I love keeping up with people on facebook but there are some people I wanted out of my life for a reason.  Facebook makes that difficult. 

   Facebook sometimes makes me sad.  I know being married and having kids isn't everything.  Just it's something I wanted in life that didn't happen.  Seeing everyone's happiness just makes me sad.  Know that sounds bad. 

  Music related.  Why is it when you go to see a singer/band you like people have to inform you ... "his gay" "one from the band is on drugs?"  I just want to hear them sing and be entertained.

Bold mine.

I always answer those overly intrusive question with "Why do you ask?".  Normally people realize that it is intrusive and drop it after that.   If they were to response "What's the big deal? I would tell you." - yikes!  The only thing I could come up with would be "But I don't care to know ".  Anyone that intrusive shouldn't be rewarded with the info they seek.

 

Don't feel bad about feeling a bit down.  I take it you're feelings are for something that has not happened for you yet and not resentment that is has happened for them.  We all feel a bit envious at times - they probably look at you and think how nice it would be to make unilateral decisions or not have to explain some things they've said or done.

 

And  most people are prone to putting on a good face on Facebook and only focusing on the positives.  Their day-to-day existence is a lot less fun-filled.  So take it with a grain of salt because that only represents a snapshot of their reality - they don't want to show (nor do we want to see) that Bill did not take out the garbage and recyclables AGAIN, that the teenage daughter generates a mountain of laundry every couple of days, that Bill Jr. tries really hard at football but is never going to be first string despite the chronic pressure of Bill Sr. that he just needs to try harder, ...

[Bastet]

And  most people are prone to putting on a good face on Facebook and only focusing on the positives.  Their day-to-day existence is a lot less fun-filled.  So take it with a grain of salt because that only represents a snapshot of their reality

 

That takes me to another peeve of mine: holiday newsletters that paint some ridiculously rosy picture of life (I'm not fond of them, period, but those are the ones that really bug me).  My best friend’s dad writes one of these every year, but they omit it from my card.  They send one to my parents, though, and I read it at their house.  It’s a Christmas Eve tradition for me to go through paragraph by paragraph and tell the real story behind the tales he wove.

 

Also photo cards, with not one word of personal note written on them.  I hate those things, period, because I have no use for the picture and the paper isn’t even recyclable.  But especially when they can’t be bothered to so much as scrawl a single personalized sentence on there.  

Edited April 26, 2015 by Bastet

[bilgistic]

I hate Facebook. I have 14 "friends", I think, if that many, and I am related or formerly related to all but two of them. If I am your "friend" and we haven't talked in real life in two years, I unfriend you. I am very particular about what pictures I put on my profile because I am very careful about my privacy; currently I have my cats actually sitting close together for once. I don't have my college or high school or hometown, etc. I have my reasons. I post very, very rarely.

My theory is that FB is like grown-up high school. There are people who amass hundreds of "friends", and at my age (40), it just seems really sad that you call hundreds of random people from 20+ years ago friends. They aren't your friends. They weren't then and they aren't now. You just want people to comment on how "Beautiful!!!" you are when you post endless selfies. You want people to tell you how cute your awkward, weird kids look when you post umpteen pictures of them; they have no say in their privacy being violated. Facebook capitalizes on how incredibly narcissist many people are, and it's gross.

FB has connected me with local vendors and activities, so it has been useful for that, but there are certainly other means for delivering that info. My mother, one sister and I have all been hurt by stupid, insensitive crap that people have posted on FB, but I guess it shows you who those folks really are. MY BOSS asked to friend me on FB, and I would not do it. I'm not related to him, nor is he my friend in real life. There are boundaries.

Edited April 26, 2015 by bilgistic

[ramble]

I rarely participate on FB either. One of my biggest gripes, other than the humble bragging, outright lying & life perfection fluffing, is what I read 3-4 times this past week. It's all a variation on a theme: I'm so blessed. Are you? And did you forget my birthday?

"I want to thank everyone for the multitude of birthday wishes, especially X for her lovely gift of junk, Y for his thoughtful gift of some other crap & Z for taking me to lunch & surprising me with more trash. Also my perfect spouse for taking the kids for the day, sending me to the spa & buying me jewels & other items showing devotion."

Well, I can't compete with that. Sounds like you got plenty of love & gifts. I was going to send a text, but now I either feel (a) inadequate, (b) just part of the herd, or © pissy & don't care to wish you happy birthday in any form. I don't have my birthday listed on FB. If you think we're close but can't write down my birthday in a calendar so you can remember that's your choice. And no I didn't forget to tell you it was my birthday doofus. I don't have to announce it. If you really want to remember it you will find a way.

Btw, I was one of the moms with little kids who used a leash. I used a sling with my first until my second was born & then a sling with the second & a leash with the first. My oldest was a runner & quick on her feet. If I had turned my back in the grocery store she would have been gone. I can't imagine letting my little ones wander. Not only due to danger from accidents & creepy people, but because they're my kids & my responsibility. If they get in your way or cause damage it is my fault. (No jerky mom at the store, it's not the store's fault for having things kids like near their level!) Several times when I used a leash older women would approach me & tell me good for me, or that they wish they had leashes back in their day or not to listen to anyone who said something negative. I found that little bit of encouragement quite satisfying.

[bilgistic]

I HATE "I'm so blessed" or #soblessed. Does that mean the rest of us are cursed? UGH!!

[harrie]

I agree!!!!!!!!!!!   the ancestry commercials, and people totally obsessed with this - " I found the house, the actual house, where someone related to me, someone who died before I was born, used to live in that house! "  so what?  

 

My mother was born in another country and came to the U.S.  nobody from her side of the family ever showed any interest in me as a child. half of them I never met, the other half I saw once or twice, and never had anything in common with them.  I met my grandfather once.   I have no interest in finding out trivial things about the lives of these people or the generations before them.  

 

See, I find stuff like that interesting, but I'm interested in history in general; and in a way, a lot of history boils down to a good juicy soap opera/political drama.  Like other genealogy enthusiasts here, I do mess around with it, but mostly only discuss it with family  -- and at that, only family who are interested.  Everyone's probably got something interesting/shameful/funny in their families' pasts (just ask Ben Affleck), but I totally get that not everyone wants to hear about it. 

 

 

 

<snip>

I'm getting nervous about this baby! I have a fair amount of experience with kids but I definitely prefer the subdued ones! I hope this one isn't wild like a bat out of hell. Well...it's just me and my cat. Maybe the child can settle down with us and be sweet.

<snip>

 

Wild, bat out of hell kids can be fun (I was one and grew up to be a responsible, semi-productive adult).  But seriously, having read your posts about your pregnancy, I think you'll be fine and hopefully find parenthood to be a fun-filled, rewarding adventure.  

 

 

 

Our local shopping malls now have (1) Handicapped parking; (2) Senior parking; (3) Pregnant and new mother parking; and (4) Hybrid parking. They practically outnumber the regular spots.   A retired physician once said to me, upon seeing the handicapped spots "I didn't have that many cripples in my entire practice".

 

Often, the number of handicapped spots are dictated by a municipality's zoning laws -- that is, X number of spaces are required based on square footage of the store, building or mall.  If the developer chooses to put all those spaces in one location on the site, it might seem like a lot of handicapped spaces.  Or the developer may have decided to go for broke, who knows?   

 

The local Whole Foods has about ten spaces right up front for fuel-efficient vehicles, and  .... well, you all can guess how many non-Flex fuel SUVs, etc. get parked in those spots.  A hybrid or compact getting a space in that row is more the exception than the rule.  

 

Parking lot peeve --- it's pouring rain.  People getting soaked trying to get to their cars have to stop and wait for a car to go by; and the person driving the car is like "It's raining, I can't stop."  Well, you're dry in the car as you're driving around, it's the pedestrians who are getting rained on.  Small potatoes in the scope of things, but still. 

 

As for Facebook, I'm not even on it.  (Yes, I'm the one.) 

[Quof]

ETA harrie, I'm the other one.

 

See, I don't do Facebook at all.  I "have" a profile, with a pseudonym and linked to an anonymous email account that no one will ever trace back to me.  I have no FB friends or photos, I don't post anything on FB.  I use it to follow businesses that interest me - often there is no other way to learn about or participate in promotions or sales.  And, sadly, the only way to communicate with many businesses is to post on their FB page.  

Edited April 26, 2015 by Quof

[Maharincess]

Yeah. You should! I had a Voss fall out and bust wide open that was set it the corner of my cart on the way to my car.

What is a Voss?

[Bastet]

I don't use Facebook, either - at all.  It is just not for me on any level, so I don't have a profile or look at anyone else's.  (And I won't do business with places that have Facebook as their only means of communication.)

 

I don't use Twitter, either (that one I really don't understand the point of), or Tumblr, and I'm not even entirely clear on what Pinterest and Instagram are (I learned at one point, thanks to a Jeopardy! category, but it didn't stick with me and I've never cared to look it up again).  And whatever else is out there in terms of social media, I can't even name. 

 

And I don't do anything online under my own name (deliberately, anyway; with the way records are being stored these days ...).  If someone were to Google me, they'd get only my State Bar profile and a few articles.  Anything else that pops up is about some other person with my name.  I'm a very private person.

Edited April 26, 2015 by Bastet

[Quof]

Bastet, I knew I recognized the reasoning of a fellow lawyer.  We're not paranoid, we're wise.

 

A friend told me he found my Facebook profile. I promised him he had not. I have an uncommon first name, an uncommon last name (and we use the less common spelling of that last name.)  Yet I found a FB profile of someone with my exact name, with a black and white profile photo that someone could mistake for my Grade 1 photo in the early 1970s. Spooky.

[backformore]

Yeah, maybe my annoyance with genealogy comes partly from a person who has my exact name who is a genealogy NUT, and I get messages from people who are trying to find her.   

But then, I laugh at the thought that people looking me up on facebook will find her, not me.  

 

I'm not on facebook.  I had a fake account, under a fake name, that I had in order to check on my kids' FB accounts when they were younger and I wanted to make sure they were being responsible.  Then I used it to play one of those social games with my son when he asked me to. So I know how it works, but I don't even use that account any more.

 I work in a setting where I don't want people I meet to look me up online.  Some of my co-workers have had some pretty scary stuff due to accepting "friends"  on FB from unstable people posting under fake names.  When you accept someone as a friend, then your real friends and family might also accept them thinking you know the person.   It's pretty easy for scary, unstable people to get waaay too close to people you know. 

[bilgistic]

That's the thing. My boss who wanted me to friend him had told me previously that he friended some crazy guy with his same name (the guy contacted him). 1) Why do you friend people you don't know? 2) That's another big reason why I'm not going to friend you. That militant nutbag is going to be looking at MY profile if we're friends b/c you don't bother to lock that down.

I also don't do any other social media (except for previously.tv, heh). I don't understand how people have the time. And again, especially with Instagram, it's just egregious narcissism on parade. Humility is a really lovely thing, and there's very little of it in our culture anymore.

I try to remind myself, though, that there have always been these kinds of people; the internet just makes them more visible.

Edited April 27, 2015 by bilgistic

[auntlada]

Btw, I was one of the moms with little kids who used a leash. I used a sling with my first until my second was born & then a sling with the second & a leash with the first. My oldest was a runner & quick on her feet. If I had turned my back in the grocery store she would have been gone. I can't imagine letting my little ones wander. Not only due to danger from accidents & creepy people, but because they're my kids & my responsibility. If they get in your way or cause damage it is my fault. (No jerky mom at the store, it's not the store's fault for having things kids like near their level!) Several times when I used a leash older women would approach me & tell me good for me, or that they wish they had leashes back in their day or not to listen to anyone who said something negative. I found that little bit of encouragement quite satisfying.

 

We got a backpack with a leash on it for things like trips to the zoo so that it wouldn't look as much like a leash so people wouldn't yell at us about putting our kid on a leash (and then I'd have to tell them to butt out in a way that might not be a good example to our son). In stores, though, we still put him in the cart (in the seat, buckled up, not in the part where the groceries go). I should probably check sometime to see what the upper weight limit is on that. He doesn't want to ride in it, but he does because what he wants to do is run around -- or help push the cart, which he can't do without running it into things because he can't see where he's going and can barely reach the handle to push.

 

When he gets mad because we're making him do something, he always says, "You're not my friend." We always tell him that no we're not his friends, we're his mommy and daddy. And his daddy always tells him that's even better because we will always love him no matter what. One night, he told me I wasn't his friend, and I explained I was his mommy, and the reason I tell him to do things is because I love him and my job is to keep him safe and to make sure he grows up to be a good person, so I tell him to do things to help him do that. He thought for a minute and said something like, "OK. I will do what you say." (Of course, he still doesn't quite often, but he is 3.)

[DeLurker]

Voss is the best water ever - said by a person who isn't a water snob.

[backformore]

Btw, I was one of the moms with little kids who used a leash. I used a sling with my first until my second was born & then a sling with the second & a leash with the first. My oldest was a runner & quick on her feet. If I had turned my back in the grocery store she would have been gone. I can't imagine letting my little ones wander. Not only due to danger from accidents & creepy people, but because they're my kids & my responsibility. If they get in your way or cause damage it is my fault. (No jerky mom at the store, it's not the store's fault for having things kids like near their level!) Several times when I used a leash older women would approach me & tell me good for me, or that they wish they had leashes back in their day or not to listen to anyone who said something negative. I found that little bit of encouragement quite satisfying.

Nothing wrong with kid leashes/harnesses.  Some kids need them.  My older one had one of those wrist ones, we used it for a very short time when he was about 2 or 3. After that, he was pretty good about staying with us.    Kid #2 was hyper and energetic and loved to RUN, jump, climb.   We had a harness for him at age 1. We used it any time we were going to be in a crowd - zoos, amusement parks, malls.

 

I have no patience for people who judge anyone for it.   Better to use a harness than to have your kid get run over by a car, or lost or abducted.   I had a friend who told me that HER kid never needed a harness, because SHE was the kind of mother who knew how to tell a kid what to do and he did it.   I informed her that HER precious baby didn't even take his first steps until 16 months, so he wasn't the type who was going anywhere in a big hurry.   My kid was running around the house at 9 months old, figured out how to open the door and go outside at 12 months, climbed out of his crib at that age as well.  He was bright, curious, and wanted to experience everything (still does).  Our friendship didn't last, in part because of her second-guessing and judging the way I parented my kids.  I hear she changed her tune once she had kid #2, but I wasn't going to stick around to find out.   

 

Back on topic -  my pet peeve is when people think that they're better parents just because they ended up having a child with a mild temperament.   Some kids are little balls of energy, some are quiet and introspective.  You can't make one into the other.  

[auntlada]

A friend of mine who was preparing for her first child asked on Facebook how to get your child to sleep through the night. Another friend recommended some book with a detailed process. I jokingly said, "Have a child who sleeps through the night," and then told her that all kids are different, some sleep all night easily and some don't, and she would have to find what works for her child. The other mother got what I considered huffy and lectured me about how she has four kids and used this method, and they all slept through the night quickly. I was tired and cranky from my son waking up a lot, but I managed not to answer or tell her to ask her science teacher husband about anecdotal evidence. Imdon't read her comments anymore on anything.

[DeLurker]

Watching the local news this morning and we had a storm front moving through the area overnight amd through the early morning.  The news has some junior reporter out driving in the area where there is a tornado watch (albeit a very low risk at the time) reporting that there are no signs of a tornado.  I loathe when the news or weather channel sends reporters out in conditions where any health and safety advisory says stay inside if at all possible.

 

If you're dumb enough to take a job where they electively send you out into a tornado, hurricane, blizzard...that's fine.  I am not interested in seeing you be a dumb ass because being a dumb ass is not newsworthy.

 

I'm very grateful there are people who willing risk their lives dealing with these situations - police, fire rescue, emergency workers...so these are not the people I am peeving about.

[Quof]

It's April 27.  It is snowing outside my window.  I am beyond peeved.

[DeLurker]

Rightly so!

[FormerMod-a1]

It's April 27.  It is snowing outside my window.  I am beyond peeved.

I'd be peeved too the snow was only outside my window and no one else's.  I'd think I was personally targeted.

[Quof]

Judging from the loud cursing and moaning I am hearing from all my colleagues, I assume it is snowing outside their windows as well.  I can't go check, because I am hiding under my desk until spring comes. 

[Maharincess]

I would rather have your snow than my 85 degree day. I don't like the heat at all.

[janie jones]

Also photo cards, with not one word of personal note written on them.  I hate those things, period, because I have no use for the picture and the paper isn’t even recyclable.  But especially when they can’t be bothered to so much as scrawl a single personalized sentence on there.  

I don't like them either.  I think for some people it's the same sort of narcissism that gets people to post selfies of themselves driving on Instagram.  I think for other people it's because they don't want to make the effort to actually write a message in a card.  Which, for me, even if you just write your name in there, it's more personal than a photo card.  It wouldn't even bother me if people stuck the exact same picture inside a regular card. Don't ask me why.

 

Kids on leashes don't bother me, but the only thing is that sometimes I wonder if parents (certain parents, not all parents) put their kids on leashes instead of watching them, not because they're runners or something.

[Bastet]

It wouldn't even bother me if people stuck the exact same picture inside a regular card. Don't ask me why.

 

I have a friend who does that, and it doesn't bother me, either.  It helps that the picture is a collage of pictures of her cats and places she traveled that year. 

[Maharincess]

I love animals, prefer them to humans but I wouldn't want a picture of somebody else's cat.

If given a choice I'd rather have cat pictures than kid pictures.

My problem with picture cards like that is what the hell am I supposed to do with them after Xmas? I feel bad throwing somebody's pictures away but I don't want to keep them either.

[Bastet]

Oh, I still throw them away rather than sticking them in an album, but I am "Auntie [bastet]" to her cats; we spent a lot of time together, I take care of them when she's away, I'm on her veterinary accounts as authorized to make decisions, etc.  While I don't save the photo cards (if for no other reason than I probably have most of the individual pictures on my computer from her emailing them to me), I at least enjoy looking at them. 

 

But even if it's somebody's kid - which I'll barely glance at, because I don't care - or house, or portrait, or whatever, I'd be more amenable to the photo card idea if it included a personalized greeting, even if just a line or two.  It would still go in the trash rather than the recycling bin, which doesn't thrill me, but at least I'd know they put forth more effort than stuffing an envelope. 

Edited April 28, 2015 by Bastet

[bubbls]

Pet peeve #1: People who ask for my email address then email nothing but jokes or funny pics. If they don't have the courtesy to address me personally then why ask for my email address? And the thing is, you never know who does this. People need to wear t-shirts or something.

 

Pet peeve #2: People who, when writing a check at a store, wait until the cashier is finished to BEGIN the whole freaking process. For Pete's sake, people, while your standing there watching your shit get rung up get the address in and sign the thing. Closely related to this; those who also make the rest of us wait while they then input the amount in the register. That can't wait until they get home???? Really???

[harrie]

Pet peeve #1: People who ask for my email address then email nothing but jokes or funny pics. If they don't have the courtesy to address me personally then why ask for my email address? And the thing is, you never know who does this. People need to wear t-shirts or something.

 

Pet peeve #2: People who, when writing a check at a store, wait until the cashier is finished to BEGIN the whole freaking process. For Pete's sake, people, while your standing there watching your shit get rung up get the address in and sign the thing. Closely related to this; those who also make the rest of us wait while they then input the amount in the register. That can't wait until they get home???? Really???

 

When someone asks for my e-mail address I say "You're not going to spam me, right?"  so at least they have an inkling not to send me the latest grumpy cat meme or whatever is making the rounds.  Still, I've been burned here and there; and I mark the sender as a spammer.  Their mails go right to the spam folder, which I clean out every day or so, so if there's something important from a spammy acquaintance, I catch it. 

 

At the store, I always get behind these people, too!  Not even for writing a check, but if paying with cash or card, they wait and wait, and finally start rummaging around for their wallet.  It's like, what - you didn't know you'd have to pay for this stuff?  The wallet plus change purse people make me a little nuts because it's a two-step operation.  On occasion I've paid the change portion of a person's bill so they can get on their way.  It's an act of kindness to myself and anyone who's behind me. 

[bubbls]

When someone asks for my e-mail address I say "You're not going to spam me, right?"  so at least they have an inkling not to send me the latest grumpy cat meme or whatever is making the rounds.  Still, I've been burned here and there; and I mark the sender as a spammer.  Their mails go right to the spam folder, which I clean out every day or so, so if there's something important from a spammy acquaintance, I catch it.

 

My husband does this and it works. He's known as the grouchy guy but he also avoids most spammy emails. He once yelled at a former co-worker for spamming him. I love it!! I need to use his techniques and stop worrying about being polite.

 

 

At the store, I always get behind these people, too!  Not even for writing a check, but if paying with cash or card, they wait and wait, and finally start rummaging around for their wallet.  It's like, what - you didn't know you'd have to pay for this stuff?  The wallet plus change purse people make me a little nuts because it's a two-step operation.  On occasion I've paid the change portion of a person's bill so they can get on their way.  It's an act of kindness to myself and anyone who's behind me.

 

 

Exactly! It's news that their purchase requires payment. Argh!! I too have volunteered change after someone....usually a trembling octogenarian.....has been fumbling for that 11 cents for five minutues. They thank me and I feel like yelling "I did it for myself now please GET OUT OF MY WAY!!"

 

I was once stuck behind a lady who took what seemed like 10 minutes to sign her name on her card receipt. I couldn't believe it and leaned over to look at her signature to figure out what the hell was taking so long. You should have seen it......a thousand pretty scrolls for what appeared to be a 3-syllable name. I looked at her with a wth-is-wrong-with-you look.

Edited April 28, 2015 by bubbls

[DeLurker]

Btw, I was one of the moms with little kids who used a leash. I used a sling with my first until my second was born & then a sling with the second & a leash with the first. My oldest was a runner & quick on her feet. If I had turned my back in the grocery store she would have been gone. I can't imagine letting my little ones wander. Not only due to danger from accidents & creepy people, but because they're my kids & my responsibility. If they get in your way or cause damage it is my fault. (No jerky mom at the store, it's not the store's fault for having things kids like near their level!) Several times when I used a leash older women would approach me & tell me good for me, or that they wish they had leashes back in their day or not to listen to anyone who said something negative. I found that little bit of encouragement quite satisfying.

I used to think poorly of leashes until I got some hands on experience with young children and realized keeping them safe and contained in public space could be a lot harder than I ever imagined.  Each child is different so while Kid 1 may never have needed it, Kid 2 just might.  I had a nephew that was petite, impulsive and fast as all get out.  His Mom taught their lab to stop him on command by blocking his path if he took off on a sprint.  She used a leash when they were someplace not dog-friendly.

 

I HATE "I'm so blessed" or #soblessed. Does that mean the rest of us are cursed? UGH!!

I have mixed feelings about this.  On one hand, I am glad people recognize the positives in their lives, but I often wonder whether they express this appreciation in their words and daily interactions (especially with their SO, children, whatnot).  I have a niece who's Mom is just rather mean to her on a daily basis*, but always posts pictures with glowing comments about her beautiful, talented daughter.  I've had my niece call me in tears because of some of the things her Mom has said and done IRL, and hurt/mad/confused because all the public praise on FB.

 

*She feels her Mom was only supportive of her when she was pursuing a modeling career at her Mom's encouragement.  When she gave it up, all the support went away.

[FormerMod-a1]

I have found the "fun" and jokes emails from friends pretty  much stopped once they got on Facebook.  They "like" or share the same things on their timeline or as they become more savvy they realize we are following the same things and see it anyway.  Now I only get real emails from friends.

 

Another pet peeve - people that say "the fact of the matter is..."  "of the matter" is superfluous.  Do these people really think that in the middle of a discussion about minimum wage, for example, that they're going to start spouting random unrelated facts?  That if they say "The fact is people are having a hard time making ends meet" that I'll think they are referring to their new string art or something? and not the discussion at hand?  In fact, you don't even need "The fact is" preface but it's not as annoying to me as "the fact of the matter".

[Bastet]

Along with the grocery store scenario is waiting in line at the gas station, and when the person in front of me finally gets their turn at the pump, they take forever to get out, then to start pumping.  What have they been doing with their time?  When I have to wait, it means by the time I get up there, I have my gas tank cover popped open, my credit card in my hand, and my seat belt off.  And even when I can pull right up to an open pump (I get my gas at Costco, so there are only certain times a day this may happen), it takes me very little time to get what I need and get out of the car.

 

And what takes them so long getting the pump started?  Even in the statistically unlikely event this is their first time getting gas, that machine only asks a few, uncomplicated questions -- payment type, PIN if applicable, maybe zip code, what octane, and whether they want a receipt.  Yet, time after time, I'm behind someone standing there studying the thing as if they're taking the SAT. 

[JTMacc99]

Lots of reasons why somebody could struggle with the gas pump. They could be from New Jersey. They might have the credit card denied. They might not understand which order of events is required for that particular pump. They might have forgotten their reading glasses since they were driving and probably didn't need them in the car. They might be not very bright. They might be taking their time and soaking up the lovely sights and sounds and fumes of the gas station.

 

Hard to say. I'd imagine it is pretty unlikely they are taking their time simply to annoy me.  Although they are probably cut from the same cloth as the people who drive 5-10 mph below the speed limit when I end up behind them, and then purposely slow down to 10-15 mph when they notice I came up on them pretty fast (aka, doing the speed limit.) And they stay down in that range until the little section of the road with the dotted line for passing at which point they suddenly get up to 5 mph OVER the speed limit before dropping right back down to 10 below around the next bend. 

[bilgistic]

I have mixed feelings about this.  On one hand, I am glad people recognize the positives in their lives, but I often wonder whether they express this appreciation in their words and daily interactions (especially with their SO, children, whatnot).  I have a niece who's Mom is just rather mean to her on a daily basis*, but always posts pictures with glowing comments about her beautiful, talented daughter.  I've had my niece call me in tears because of some of the things her Mom has said and done IRL, and hurt/mad/confused because all the public praise on FB.

 

*She feels her Mom was only supportive of her when she was pursuing a modeling career at her Mom's encouragement.  When she gave it up, all the support went away.

The only people I have seen using "blessed" are generally assholes to most people in real life and just put a nice face on Facebook. Kris freaking Jenner used #soblessed on Instagram on a picture when she was laying out in the sun on some glamorous vacation. (I hate that I know this, because I generally try to avoid celebrity news.) My somewhat estranged sister uses that "blessed" garbage, and the reason she's somewhat estranged is because she's removed herself from our lives, not the other way around. She also posts pictures on Facebook of the food she's cooked and says she "put her foot in it". It's something the kids say I guess (she's all of four years younger than me, at 36, but acts about 21), but it just makes me think of someone putting their actual foot in my food, and I just don't want that, for quite obvious reasons.