Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[Notabug]

This is my second knee and I've had a hip, too.  I'm sort of a do-it-yourself urban renewal project at this point.  There is no comparison between hips and knees.  I'd rather have 10 hips replaced than one knee.  Luckily, I am out of knees to replace.  With my last knee surgery, I had a copay on a couple of things but the entire out of pocket cost was under $200 on a surgery that costs upwards of $40,000.  So far, I had a $35 copay for a pre-op anesthesia assessment.  That's it. 

My employer, who you all know, is big on joint replacements and also does same day knee replacements.  My surgeon, also employed by same system, when doing my pre-op visit said, "C________C_____ has an outpatient knee program.  You don't want to go home the day of surgery, do you? Of course not." Asked and answered, definitely no pressure, he thinks it is not a viable option for most ('I wouldn't do it' was his personal opinion).   I would've gone home post op day 1, but had a mild dizzy spell after walking down the hallway.  Didn't fall, nurse and PT were walking with me, sat me down and took me back to my room.  Forced some fluids and was fine in half an hour, but that cancelled the discharge. I had taken an extra oxycodone in anticipation of PT and I think that's what did it.  So, I went home day 2.  And take the oxycodone one at a time.

[zoomama]

it is surprising what surgeries are 'outpatient' nowadays. my shoulder was, technically, although i stayed overnight because my husband insisted (lots of preexisting lung issues).  i just think the system takes it a bit too far when shoving you out an hour after a major surgery. 24 hours to see how you do and for pain control  is not too much to ask.

[crazycatlady58]

Does anyone have any ideas on how to get rid of old photos? I have somehow become the person that has all the family pictures. Not sure how that happened, as a single woman with no children so no one to pass them on to, and I look at the stacks of pictures knowing I have no need of them and will not look at them but when I think about throwing them away it feels like I am throwing the people and the memories away. I can give some to my aunt but still have the emotional feelings about the rest.

[oliviabenson]

6 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Does anyone have any ideas on how to get rid of old photos? I have somehow become the person that has all the family pictures. Not sure how that happened, as a single woman with no children so no one to pass them on to, and I look at the stacks of pictures knowing I have no need of them and will not look at them but when I think about throwing them away it feels like I am throwing the people and the memories away. I can give some to my aunt but still have the emotional feelings about the rest.

To the youngest person in the family? 

[crazycatlady58]

2 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

To the youngest person in the family? 

That would be my brother who lives on a sailboat with his girlfriend and her 2 grand kids. They have no room and he has no interest.

[oliviabenson]

12 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

That would be my brother who lives on a sailboat with his girlfriend and her 2 grand kids. They have no room and he has no interest.

I have the same issue. Ton of pictures and I don’t think my cousin wants them. We are not close. I don’t have kids. Guess they will be thrown out when I croak. 

[zoomama]

i divided up whati had by sibling and put them in giant baggies. then i handed off the baggies to the appropriate person and said 'enjoy'. i also did this with my kids photos too.

[BetyBee]

I worry sometimes about what will happen when no one is left to identify all the people in old pictures. I do think about digitizing old photos or sharing them on one of those Aura frames. I was just at my cousin's memorial service and there were boards full of old family photos and a slide show with more pics. It really is nice to see the whole life before you of your loved one. 

There is a discussion on the Jill & Derick page about Monopoly. I have played that with my grandkids, along with their hometown version and Catopoly. At first it was fun, but my grandboys tend to get into fights as the game wears on and it's apparent who is winning! Monopoly is a funny game that goes on too long imo. It's fun acquiring properties and rolling doubles and reading the chance cards, but the fun kind of ends when rent collecting starts and it's officially over when the houses and hotels go up! We made a group decision not to play any more "opoly" games! 

[Notabug]

15 hours ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Does anyone have any ideas on how to get rid of old photos? I have somehow become the person that has all the family pictures. Not sure how that happened, as a single woman with no children so no one to pass them on to, and I look at the stacks of pictures knowing I have no need of them and will not look at them but when I think about throwing them away it feels like I am throwing the people and the memories away. I can give some to my aunt but still have the emotional feelings about the rest.

I have been going through mountains of photos myself.  My first piece of advice; toss out anything that is not a good quality image and identifiable.  This is especially true of vacation photos and such.  I travel a lot and used to take hundreds of photos each time and then never looked at them again.  Now, as I revisit them; I edit ruthlessly.  Anything that is out of focus or shows up better elsewhere is gone.  Duplicates of the same site from different angles are tossed.  I've found that I will often find only a half dozen or so images that speak to me out of a couple hundred snaps from the same trip.  I hang onto those and toss the rest.  And make sure to label the ones I save as thoroughly as possible.  Date, place, names of people (and who they are if I met them on the trip) and specifics as to what is in the photo.  I've actually filled a couple of collage frames with favorite vacation shots and hung them on the wall where I can actually see them as opposed to hundreds of pictures in a box I never look at.

There are a lot of websites that will store photos for you, you can always edit and then upload them there and still have access even if you no longer have the hard copy.  One of my BIL's who is an IT whiz, set up a website for family photos.  First, my sister goes through our family photos and identifies the people and places as best she can.  Then, he uploads them and other family members can view them and add info if they have it.  It is really important to have the most senior family members look at the old stuff and give names and dates that they remember ASAP. One of my uncles, late 80's and suffering from dementia, is absolutely sharp as a tack when it comes to old pics.  He can name people in photos that are 80 years old and even tells stories about them, but cannot remember the name of the visiting nurse he sees 3 times a week.  He really gets a kick out of looking at the old photos and his kids also love spending time with him doing this.

[Salacious Kitty]

Interesting. It looks like we lost all the posts between updates. 

[GeeGolly]

Yikes, a dislike reaction emoji. Why? And damn, the LOL one is a tad frightening. 😬

[Salacious Kitty]

They'll probably manually remove the dislike emoji. What a mess this has been. For absolutely zero improvement.

[Ancaster]

On 12/19/2023 at 9:30 AM, zoomama said:

it is surprising what surgeries are 'outpatient' nowadays. my shoulder was, technically, although i stayed overnight because my husband insisted (lots of preexisting lung issues).  i just think the system takes it a bit too far when shoving you out an hour after a major surgery. 24 hours to see how you do and for pain control  is not too much to ask.

Not a surgery, but giving birth's pretty much handled as an 'outpatient' event in far too many cases, and has been for a long time.  How about giving a new mum time to rest and have someone else take care of the diapers and the cooking and dishes for a couple of days?  Or paying for a home birth and a doula if that's what the parents want?

[Ancaster]

2 hours ago, Salacious Kitty said:

Interesting. It looks like we lost all the posts between updates. 

I thought it was just mine (narcissist that I am)!    😄

 

1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

Yikes, a dislike reaction emoji. Why? And damn, the LOL one is a tad frightening. 😬

 There's a dislike emoji?  I don't see one.  And yes, the LOL one is a really nasty face.  I hope I don't look like that when I laugh.  Maybe I do?  Perhaps I should check.  Or perhaps not.

And why the announcement about network troubles?  Why not just say they're rejiggering the site?  Weird.

 

Edited December 23, 2023 by Ancaster

[BetyBee]

It's a Christmas miracle! Primetimer is working again! 😀

[Ancaster]

47 minutes ago, BetyBee said:

It's a Christmas miracle! Primetimer is working again! 😀

I just LOL'ed you, and I'm kind of sorry i did because it's so freaky.  Argh!

Mods - please choose a different emoji!

Edited December 23, 2023 by Ancaster

[Ancaster]

@BetyBee

Stop the madness already!

[BetyBee]

4 minutes ago, Ancaster said:

@BetyBee

Stop the madness already!

Sorry! I couldn't resist! 

[Salacious Kitty]

Dislike emoji has been removed. 

Happy Festivus, everyone! 😃

 

[AstridM]

10 hours ago, Salacious Kitty said:

They'll probably manually remove the dislike emoji. What a mess this has been. For absolutely zero improvement.

Never try to fix what’s not broken. 

9 hours ago, Ancaster said:

Not a surgery, but giving birth's pretty much handled as an 'outpatient' event in far too many cases, and has been for a long time.  How about giving a new mum time to rest and have someone else take care of the diapers and the cooking and dishes for a couple of days?  Or paying for a home birth and a doula if that's what the parents want?

In the US, they’ll even put new moms and babies right back on the streets if they’re homeless 🥲.

[oliviabenson]

Well I got scammed by the locksmith. I got locked out by a broken lock. Long story short eventually found a guy who was willing to take a CC. Except when he came he refused. I had to beg people for Venmo so I can get into my apartment. To add insult to my problem he did a terrible job installing the lock. I am going to have more problems with the door.

 

Now I’m completely broke so No Birthday meal or anything for me next week. 
 

Happy holidays to all!

[oliviabenson]

I’m going to get a second job next year I’m so tired of being broke. It truly sucks that employers do not want to pay living wages. I have 2 degrees and make peanuts.
 

Wish me luck. 

[BetyBee]

I do wish you luck, @oliviabenson! You are so clever and well educated and you deserve a job that pays a living wage! 

[oliviabenson]

ME AGAIN feel free to skip reading! 
 

Last post of pity/venting:

I was supposed to celebrate with my bestie on Friday. Well obviously that didn’t happen and now I’m broke to celebrate anything until next paycheck. 
 

I am grateful 2 people loaned me the $ so I could be in my apartment. 
 

Sleeping on the floor/train etc opened my eyes to how fortunate I am that my mommy took care of me and made sure I was never ever homeless. and being homeless sucks no shower no bathroom no clean clothes. No decent meals. Good lord I wouldn’t last 3 days being a homeless woman. 
 

 

 

[oliviabenson]

20 minutes ago, BetyBee said:

I do wish you luck, @oliviabenson! You are so clever and well educated and you deserve a job that pays a living wage! 

Thank you so much!

[Notabug]

16 hours ago, Ancaster said:

Not a surgery, but giving birth's pretty much handled as an 'outpatient' event in far too many cases, and has been for a long time.  How about giving a new mum time to rest and have someone else take care of the diapers and the cooking and dishes for a couple of days?  Or paying for a home birth and a doula if that's what the parents want?

US regulations require that women who give birth are allowed up to 48 hours in the hospital after a vaginal birth and 96 hours after a cesarean.  The woman herself can choose to go home sooner, but chlldbirth is no longer considered an outpatient procedure and hasn't been for at least 20 years.

As far as providing a new mother with household help and childcare, that is not a service that health insurance provides for anyone else, it would be opening a whole can of worms for health insurance companies to be required to provide those kinds of services.

7 hours ago, AstridM said:

Never try to fix what’s not broken. 

In the US, they’ll even put new moms and babies right back on the streets if they’re homeless 🥲.

No, they do not.  There are social safety nets out there, not great ones, but any new mother who has no place to go will be offered the option of local shelters set up specifically for mothers and children.  Most have a time limit as to how long they can stay there, maybe 30 days, but no homeless mothers and babies are discharged without options.

Speaking of outpatient procedures, any surgery in which the patient can be discharged within 24 hours of the procedure is considered outpatient.  It's the definition used by insurance companies.  My recent knee replacement could've been 'outpatient' if I wanted.  I didn't.  People actually get joint replacements in the morning and are back at home for dinner.  I ended up staying 2 days.  Surgery on Monday, home on Wednesday; worked out fine for me.  Most hysterectomies are outpatient these days including ones for malignancy where lymph nodes, etc are removed.  The woman either goes home the evening of surgery or the next morning.   

Edited December 24, 2023 by Notabug

[realityfan26]

My girlfriend had a double mastectomy with expanders put in and was home the same evening. Thank goodness her husband was able to really care for her as she was pretty loopy.

My sister has had shoulder replacement and home the same day. I forgot if she was with her ankle replacements. (bad bones everywhere for her!)

Edited December 24, 2023 by realityfan26

[zoomama]

my shoulder replacement was same day but hubby made some noise so they kept me over night due to my lung issues but to be clear, they had me outta there by 10:00a.m. the next morning. at least i got breakfast!

[oliviabenson]

 

 

I finally got around to trying Trader Joe’s pretzel pudding for breakfast… It’s really yummy! Hey it’s Christmas I’m allowed to eat dessert for breakfast!

 

What is everyone having for dinner???

Edited December 24, 2023 by oliviabenson

[oliviabenson]

Happy holidays!

[louannems]

19 hours ago, Notabug said:

People actually get joint replacements in the morning and are back at home for dinner. 

My double hip replacement surgery was from 2:25 to 5p.m.  That’s the actual cutting to close time from my surgeon’s notes.  I was back home by 9 p.m., with an hour drive.  I was offered a bed and my surgeon said he didn’t expect me to go home that day but I did everything the therapist said and was able to go home.  I did have one low-blood pressure episode as soon as I got home, which was scary.  Luckily they sent me home with a thick canvas strap still around my waist and hubby was able to get me back to laying flat quickly.  I was also sent home with two hip wrap ice machines and great follow up, including calls and messages from my nurse navigator.

[Nysha]

I have trouble waking up after surgery, so every day surgery I've had in the last 30 years (3) has turned into an overnight stay. The insurance refused to authorize the second surgery stay because I lived within 40 miles of a hospital and wouldn't accept my doctor's explanation that it was a 60-90 minute drive. Thankfully, the hospital agreed to waive the charge if the insurance wouldn't pay for an overnight stay because I was on oxygen for most of the night.

Edited December 24, 2023 by Nysha

[SunnyBeBe]

5 hours ago, oliviabenson said:

 

 

I finally got around to trying Trader Joe’s pretzel pudding for breakfast… It’s really yummy! Hey it’s Christmas I’m allowed to eat dessert for breakfast!

 

What is everyone having for dinner???

We are eating leftovers from last night:(We had our main celebration gathering then.  So, so spreading out the celebration over 3 days.)  Meatballs, chicken salad, boiled shrimp, veggie tray, cheese tray, broccoli, hash brown casserole, veggie fries, apple pie, pecan pie, coconut pie, and chocolate brownie with ice cream and whipped cream. (My mom made 4 kinds of fudge that I haven’t tried.)I was very selective and had tiny tastes of things.  Tried to stick with the more healthful dishes. Lol  (I’ve been on tight diet since March.) Tomorrow, I’m going to cook a turkey breast and sweet potatoes to serve with veggies.  And, a pumpkin pie.  For some reason, I’m craving a Starbucks coffee!  
 

My brother brought his new puppy last night!  So cute.  My mom is holding him.  He’s so precious.  Trying to attach image.  
 

 

Edited December 24, 2023 by SunnyBeBe

[oliviabenson]

38 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

We are eating leftovers from last night:(We had our main celebration gathering then.  So, so spreading out the celebration over 3 days.)  Meatballs, chicken salad, boiled shrimp, veggie tray, cheese tray, broccoli, hash brown casserole, veggie fries, apple pie, pecan pie, coconut pie, and chocolate brownie with ice cream and whipped cream. (My mom made 4 kinds of fudge that I haven’t tried.)I was very selective and had tiny tastes of things.  Tried to stick with the more healthful dishes. Lol  (I’ve been on tight diet since March.) Tomorrow, I’m going to cook a turkey breast and sweet potatoes to serve with veggies.  And, a pumpkin pie.  For some reason, I’m craving a Starbucks coffee!  
 

My brother brought his new puppy last night!  So cute.  My mom is holding him.  He’s so precious.  Trying to attach image.  
 

 

Can I come over to eat? You made me hungry lol!

[Suzn]

2 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

Can I come over to eat? You made me hungry lol!

Me too?

[oliviabenson]

Just now, Suzn said:

Me too?

Now it’s a party! 

I can bring cake and sparkling grape juice .

[Suzn]

3 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

Now it’s a party! 

I can bring cake and sparkling grape juice .

Perfect - I'm in!

[SunnyBeBe]

Yes!  The more the merrier!  🥰🫶🏻🥳😍🥂🍰🍧🍤🤶⭐️🫶🏻
 

Merry Christmas to all!  

Edited December 24, 2023 by SunnyBeBe

[oliviabenson]

Just now, SunnyBeBe said:

Yes!  The more the merrier!  🥰🫶🏻🥳😍🥂🍰🍧🍤🤶⭐️🫶🏻

You are about to have a primetimer meet up around all that delicious food! 
 

Merry Christmas!!!

[oliviabenson]

OMG the LOL reaction emoji is creepy! 
 

[AstridM]

54 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

OMG the LOL reaction emoji is creepy! 
 

I really want the old one back!

[Scarlett45]

Happy Holidays- from my family to yours. (Original post got eaten in the update)

 

 

[wilsie]

9 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Happy Holidays- from my family to yours. (Original post got eaten in the update)

 

 

Worth a repeat! What an awesome holiday card! Everyone looks great and Cosmo has his trademark smile.

 

[oliviabenson]

I actually went to the movies in Times Square! Yay. Will see 3 movies lol. 
 

Merry Christmas!

[BetyBee]

My Mom passed away this morning. My brother found her. She died peacefully in her chair this Christmas morning. She was 93. My heart is broken. 

[Scarlett45]

29 minutes ago, BetyBee said:

My Mom passed away this morning. My brother found her. She died peacefully in her chair this Christmas morning. She was 93. My heart is broken. 

Oh my goodness @BetyBee. What sorrow for you and your family. I am glad your mother’s passing was peaceful, but I know that doesn’t take away the heartache of losing her. Your family has had several losses the last few years, sending you peace and comfort during this time. 

[SunnyBeBe]

29 minutes ago, BetyBee said:

My Mom passed away this morning. My brother found her. She died peacefully in her chair this Christmas morning. She was 93. My heart is broken. 

Oh, my goodness.  I can only imagine your grief.  Regardless of our loved one’s age, the loss is still profound.  Do you have someone there with you?  

[BetyBee]

4 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Oh, my goodness.  I can only imagine your grief.  Regardless of our loved one’s age, the loss is still profound.  Do you have someone there with you?  

Yes, thank you for asking. My kids had all just left for their in-laws when I got the call. My husband is here and I've been talking with my siblings and my kids. We have to plan things and hold one another up. My youngest sister and her husband are home with Covid. I wish I could hug her. It's really hard to believe, even though it wasn't unexpected. 

[SunnyBeBe]

2 minutes ago, BetyBee said:

Yes, thank you for asking. My kids had all just left for their in-laws when I got the call. My husband is here and I've been talking with my siblings and my kids. We have to plan things and hold one another up. My youngest sister and her husband are home with Covid. I wish I could hug her. It's really hard to believe, even though it wasn't unexpected. 

There are no words. I’ve often heard that most of us will likely all eventually bury our parents, but it seems surreal.  Please accept my condolences.  I hope you’ll find comfort in family and friends.   

[sixlets]

I am so sorry, @BetyBee.  Your family will be in my thoughts in the coming days and weeks.  

Our Christmas plans got so screwed up, and I'm so glad it's over.  Long story short, my mom could not come down, but my inlaws did come.  They arrived Saturday afternoon and left this morning.  At the very least, my MIL brought homemade cookies, which are delish.  I made a large salad, an extra large homemade lasagna, and a normal size apple pie.  Mr. Six always takes this time of the year off for vacation (he gets 6 weeks/year but can only carry 2 over).  He's home until next Tuesday.  Dog help me...