Bethenny Frankel: Skinny Girl

[Celia Rubenstein]

The judge didn't think it was funny either.

 

What I think is funny is that Jason would actually make an issue of it.  

[LotusFlower]

The judge didn't think it was funny either.

For good reason. There are so many things wrong about a mother fitting into her five year old's clothes. Think about how Bryn is going to feel when her clothes become too big or baggy for her mother - oh, in about two years. Then the public posting of the picture brings up a whole other slew of issues...

[WireWrap]

My guess is she spends a lot of time thinking about how to build her multi-million dollar empire even bigger and worrying about her daughter.  That probably takes up the bulk of her free time. I doubt she spends as much time wrestling her childhood demons as her Bravo narrative would lead us to believe.    

Bravo can't air what Bethenny does not give them. She is the one going to fake therapy sessions on camera, no one is forcing to her to do it.

 

The conversation was 3-4 a month versus 1-2 a month. J said we only drive up half of that. B said that she wanted some family time with just J and the baby. She talked about walks around the reservoir on a Sunday morning. J ignored it all and suggested that if she didn't want to go to PA he would just take Brynn himself and leave her to do whatever she wanted. It was a cruel fight. The other part of that exchange was that it took 4 hours driving time. So I'm guessing traffic caused it to be slower?

Name me 1 time they were ever shown alone, camera crew the only exception, without a nanny or her cast of employees?

[motorcitymom65]

Her talk show was so bad.  Unless you were snarking about it, then there were endless things to talk about.

 

Last night on WWHL Beth and Andy were talking about HWs that you love to hate and those that you hate to hate.  I don't 'hate' any of them but when Bethenny was on the top of my love to hate list, someone asked me why I even bothered watching her.  And last night, she answered that question for me.

 

I love to hate Bethenny and Heather.  And Carole.  Watching them be whiny, bossy and precious is hilarious to me.  I love to hate them for those reasons.  They entertain me.

 

Now Kim Richards, I can't even.  I hate to hate her.  It's no fun so I don't watch, don't read, don't participate.  There's no entertainment.  It's 100% pain.  Even though the above mentioned annoy me with their 'quirks', their idiocy is fun to watch and comment on.

I thought that was the most interesting part of the segment (most of it reminded me of the little I had seen of Beth's talk show. She would ask a question, and then talk nonstop and never let the person answer). I had never thought about it quite like that, but there are HW's that I love to hate. For me that would be Vicki, Tamra, and Ramona. Every move they make or sentence they utter is cause for eye-rolling and snark. At the same time, I think they bring something to the show and I'm not 100% sure I would enjoy the dynamics as much if they were gone. I think they are ridiculous, but they are necessary and serve a purpose. There are other HW's that I just detest enough to be bitter about receiving a paycheck from Bravo for a show that I watch. That would be Kim Richards, Brandi, or Aviva. For the most part, I don't actually hate the others enough to want to see them without the Bravo paycheck.

[LotusFlower]

How much do you want to bet one of her advisors had to talk her out of a Skinny Kids branding attempt?

Clothes that fit both you and your little ones! Think of the savings! The joint closets! The smaller wash loads!

[QuinnM]

Name me 1 time they were ever shown alone, camera crew the only exception, without a nanny or her cast of employees?

They were in her original apt. She was n the sofa talking across the back of it. He was standing holding Brynn to the right of the dining table. Not sure why this is important? Am I missing something?

[Celia Rubenstein]

For good reason. There are so many things wrong about a mother fitting into her five year old's clothes. Think about how Bryn is going to feel when her clothes become too big or baggy for her mother - oh, in about two years. Then the public posting of the picture brings up a whole other slew of issues...

 

.... which I think will pale in comparison to the issues Bryn will face every day as she is confronted with magazine covers filled with air-brushed, photo-shopped images of women that are unrealistic and hopelessly unattainable.  

 

Maybe the judge should order Bryn to be kept blindfolded in the grocery store check-out line to protect her delicate sensibilities, lol

Edited May 28, 2015 by Celia Rubenstein

[shoegal]

 Name me 1 time they were ever shown alone, camera crew the only exception, without a nanny or her cast of employees?

As I have said, I am re watching BEA (it's quite useful in airports and hotels) I am four episodes in and I can think of two off the top of my head. First scene in the first episode, Jason, Bethenny, Bryn and Cookie go for a walk by the Hudson, come home to an empty apartment and Jason puts the baby down and they sit/lay on the couch and talk about their new little family. This is when Bethenny brings up needing a will to protect Bryn and they joke about her not leaving Jason any money to spend on his next wife. Very interesting conversation in a new light.

Second, after the baptism/non baptism freak out at baby nurse Gina's church where they both freak out and Bethenny grabs Bryn and hauls ass out of there, they are laying around the house the next day discussing what happens and they decide to have Bryn baptized in the Catholic Church. Bethenny is laying on the bed playing with Bryn and Jason is sitting in the chair by the bed.

I think this whole idea that there are always staff around or Bethenny's only friends are staff based on the show fails to recognize that what we see is set up specifically for the show. I don't think there is much interest in watching Bethenny and Jason lay around and watch TV alone, or read a book.

.....and, Bethenny has more friends! Her friend Jake is in a few scenes. Plus, there was a couple with teenage kids who had Bethenny, Jason and Bryn to their house for Halloween (they dressed as a family if pandas) can't recall their names but they were Bethenny's friends. She's up to four now!

[LotusFlower]

.... which I think will pale in comparison to the issues Bryn will face every day as she is confronted with magazine covers filled with air-brushed, photo-shopped images of women that are unrealistic and hopelessly unattainable.  

That is nothing compared to the damage caused by your own mother giving you harmful messages in your own home. Want evidence? Bethenny.

[Celia Rubenstein]

That is nothing compared to the damage caused by your own mother giving you harmful messages in your own home. Want evidence? Bethenny.

 

What exactly was the harmful message?  I am sincerely asking, not trying to challenge you.    Anyone can feel free to answer, and please do.  Because I truly just don't see it.  

[WireWrap]

They were in her original apt. She was n the sofa talking across the back of it. He was standing holding Brynn to the right of the dining table. Not sure why this is important? Am I missing something?

Where was the live in nanny? She may not have been in the room but she was in the apartment.

[shoegal]

We never heard Jason say those words. This is your read. Bethenny obviously wasn't up for compromise she notified him by letter the were divorcing. I can buy that she got very successful and all of sudden falling for the wage earner regular guy had lost its luster. It may be just me but I think their issues had far more to do with business than the Hoppys' visitation. At one point she said something about Jason lamenting he had not struck it rich on his own. There was back and forth with him working for her or not. If they really divorced over the Hoppys and whether they would visit Bryn once or twice or month they had some really big problems.

Keep in mind Bethenny testified she called Jason white trash and at some point vowed he would not be seeing Bryn. BTW divorcing people saying they are going to ruin the other is pretty commonplace. For some reason Bethenny took it very personal when Jason would not just agree and go away quietly. I truly believe Bethenny thought she could buy her way out of having involved Jason and the Hoppys in her daughter's life. It would have been so much cheaper and less stressful to just use a sperm donor. I am not saying Jason should get some big pay day but I do admire him for sticking to 50/50 custody. I only hope these two incredibly self-absorbed people were better at keeping it away from the child than the were the press.

Bethenny filed for primary custody and wanted to move to California for her new talk show. That is treating people as if they are pretty fungible. Granted she lost the fight, the show was filmed in NY and now it was a bad experience for Bethenny. At one point she and Jason were looking for homes in Beverly Hills, again another out of town extended stay while she filmed "Skating with the Stars". So it is pretty irrelevant how often the Hoppys wanted to see the child-how often did they actually see the child? I am all for not having to sit around in PA for the weekend-but there are ways to deal with it to limit one's time there.

Yea, this is my read on Jason, which is why there are no quotation marks. I promise to be more diligent about using IMO, but just in case you can assume unless I am quoting someone specifically, it is "my read" on things.

Now, as far as for why I think that Jason wasn't willing to compromise and wanted what he wanted -weekends with Bryn and his parents - is because I can't ever recall Jason putting forth any kind of compromise or even acting as if he wanted one. He never said to Bethenny that they could slow down on the visit frequency to make her comfortable, or offer solutions other than to take Bryn and leave Bethenny at home. In fact, in this conversation when Bethenny is trying to offer alternatives to another PA visit 2 weeks after the last, Jason tells her specifically " you need to get over this. I am not wrong" he tells her to "get over it" several times. When Bethenny expressed her frustration, all Jason seemed to care about was hurting his parents feelings. I think Bethenny came second to Hoppy parents in Jason's eyes.

I do not believe that the disagreements over the in laws were the reason Bethenny and Jason divorced, I think they were a manifestation of the real reason they are divorcing and that is that they never really knew each other and really had nothing in common. Personally, I think Jason never even liked Bethenny that much, let alone loved her. I think Bethenny was in love with the idea of Jason but quickly realized she was married to the *actual* Jason and that wasn't so great.

As far as the divorce, I haven't really kept up but the custody issue has been settled, so if Jason was sticking it out for the sake of time with his daughter, it certainly seems to me he is sticking it out for something else, now. My opinion is that it's a big fat chunk of change, which I do think is one thing he did like about Bethenny.

Where was the live in nanny? She may not have been in the room but she was in the apartment.

Gina did not live with them, she spent nights but was not there 24/7. Edited May 28, 2015 by shoegal

[LotusFlower]

What exactly was the harmful message? I am sincerely asking, not trying to challenge you. Anyone can feel free to answer, and please do. Because I truly just don't see it.

Here's the most obvious: Skinny is most important. What you look like is most important. Don't eat. Don't gain weight. Or you might go up a dress size or two. And be larger than your own (grown) mother.

ETA: the Huffington Post commentary is so well articulated.

Edited May 28, 2015 by LotusFlower

[shoegal]

Here's the most obvious: Skinny is most important. What you look like is most important. Don't eat. Don't gain weight. Or you might go up a dress size or two. And be larger than your own (grown) mother.

Well, Bryn is the heiress to the SkinnyGirl empire, so I don't really see the big fuss over an Instagram pic.

IMO

[QuinnM]

Where was the live in nanny? She may not have been in the room but she was in the apartment.

I don't remember if they still had the baby nurse. I know the next nanny did not spend the night or weekends.

Again what am I missing? How does this change the discussion of spending all your free time in the middle of no where PA?

What is this about?

[Celia Rubenstein]

I just can't read all that into that picture.   Bethenny captioned the picture with this:

 

"This is my daughter's nightgown and PJ shorts. Think we're ready to start sharing clothes yet?"

 

There wasn't anything said about a need to be skinny or look a certain way. I think that is reading in a message that simply wasn't there.  

 

When I was looking for the caption to quote, I found this tidbit, from Bethenny being interviewed by Meredith Vierra about "pajamagate" :

 

"It was a dress of my daughter’s and she’s like put this on and one of my friends was like, ‘Your Instagram game is weak.’ So I just took a picture and thought it was cute. I had no idea that I would get that backlash. I had no idea and I really didn’t think it was that big of a deal.  I had no idea and I really didn’t think it was that big of a deal. I didn’t think people were going to start being anorexic because I put my daughter’s clothes on. I just thought it was a ridiculous joke. I peed in a champagne bucket at my own wedding."

 

 

So it was Bryn's idea of some kind of dress up game, apparently.  I am thinking she will look at that picture and smile one day, remembering some fun she had with her mom.  Not be driven to anorexia, for heaven's sake.  JMHO.

 

ETA link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgGGF_xLyik

 

From the HuffPo above:

 

Also, what sort of message is she trying to send to her daughter? Her mother is posing for a picture in her pajamas, probably her favorite set of pajamas, and she is teaching her that being the size of a 4-year-old is what she should want to be at the age of 43. Teaching a child that maintaining her toddler-sized body is what she should want is only going to set her up for a life plagued by body insecurities. This young child was born into the world four short years ago, meaning that her mother's word is gospel. This 4-year-old is already being taught that smaller is better, smaller is beautiful, smaller is what she should want.

 

 

What melodramatic crap.  Leave it to HuffPo.  A pile of dry kindling in search of a reason to explode into a bonfire of self-righteous indignation, as usual. 

Edited May 28, 2015 by Celia Rubenstein

[LotusFlower]

Well, Bryn is the heiress to the SkinnyGirl empire, so I don't really see the big fuss over an Instagram pic.

It's true - it's all part and parcel of the same thing. Poor Bryn is going to grow up with harmful messages about food and weight and body issues everywhere she turns (in her mother's world). The IG pic was just a startling image that put it all out there.

[WireWrap]

Yea, this is my read on Jason, which is why there are no quotation marks. I promise to be more diligent about using IMO, but just in case you can assume unless I am quoting someone specifically, it is "my read" on things.

Now, as far as for why I think that Jason wasn't willing to compromise and wanted what he wanted -weekends with Bryn and his parents - is because I can't ever recall Jason putting forth any kind of compromise or even acting as if he wanted one. He never said to Bethenny that they could slow down on the visit frequency to make her comfortable, or offer solutions other than to take Bryn and leave Bethenny at home. In fact, in this conversation when Bethenny is trying to offer alternatives to another PA visit 2 weeks after the last, Jason tells her specifically " you need to get over this. I am not wrong" he tells her to "get over it" several times. When Bethenny expressed her frustration, all Jason seemed to care about was hurting his parents feelings. I think Bethenny came second to Hoppy parents in Jason's eyes.

I do not believe that the disagreements over the in laws were the reason Bethenny and Jason divorced, I think they were a manifestation of the real reason they are divorcing and that is that they never really knew each other and really had nothing in common. Personally, I think Jason never even liked Bethenny that much, let alone loved her. I think Bethenny was in love with the idea of Jason but quickly realized she was married to the *actual* Jason and that wasn't so great.

As far as the divorce, I haven't really kept up but the custody issue has been settled, so if Jason was sticking it out for the sake of time with his daughter, it certainly seems to me he is sticking it out for something else, now. My opinion is that it's a big fat chunk of change, which I do think is one thing he did like about Bethenny.

Gina did not live with them, she spent nights but was not there 24/7.

Being there all day and spending the night 5 days a week is considered a "live in" nanny.

 

Well, Bryn is the heiress to the SkinnyGirl empire, so I don't really see the big fuss over an Instagram pic.

IMO

Only if Bethenny leaves it to her. Lets see how things go between them when Bryn hits the teen years! LOL

 

I don't remember if they still had the baby nurse. I know the next nanny did not spend the night or weekends.

Again what am I missing? How does this change the discussion of spending all your free time in the middle of no where PA?

What is this about?

The comment was made that Bethenny did not want to go to Jason's parents home because she wanted time for just the 3 of them. There was always someone with them, be it camera crew, he SG employees or the nanny so IMO, that argument does not make sense. Oh, and people pay big bucks to stay in vacation homes in the woods/mountains of PA. LOL

[shoegal]

It's true - it's all part and parcel of the same thing. Poor Bryn is going to grow up with harmful messages about food and weight and body issues everywhere she turns (in her mother's world). The IG pic was just a startling image that put it all out there.

Well, good thing she will have rich parents that will pay for her to go to prestigious schools. So all will be fine.

[WireWrap]

I just can't read all that into that picture.   Bethenny captioned the picture with this:

 

 

There wasn't anything said about a need to be skinny or look a certain way. I think that is reading in a message that simply wasn't there.  

 

When I was looking for the caption to quote, I found this tidbit, from Bethenny being interviewed by Meredith Vierra about "pajamagate" :

 

 

So it was Bryn's idea of some kind of dress up game, apparently.  I am thinking she will look at that picture and smile one day, remembering some fun she had with her mom.  Not be driven to anorexia, for heaven's sake.  JMHO.

 

ETA link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgGGF_xLyik

This coming from the same woman, Bethenny, that outed her own mother's anorexia/bulimia and how awful that was for her to watch/see/experience it happen. JS

[LotusFlower]

There wasn't anything said about a need to be skinny or look a certain way. I think that is reading in a message that simply wasn't there.

She's four! Four years old! She's not reading her mother's Instagram account to get messages about growing up. She's looking at her mother right in front of her, wearing her child-sized pjs, and gets all sorts of messages that way. And hearing Bethenny's "no big deal" response is even sadder, indicating what's in store for Bryn as she grows.

[shoegal]

She's four! Four years old! She's not reading her mother's Instagram account to get messages about growing up. She's looking at her mother right in front of her, wearing her child-sized pjs, and gets all sorts of messages that way. And hearing Bethenny's "no big deal" response is even sadder, indicating what's in store for Bryn as she grows.

I don't know that a four year old interprets mommy wearing my clothes as 'I should stay skinny because skinny is all that matters'...I think four year old thinks 'mommy is being funny!'

[shoegal]

Rich people have plenty of problems. They arguably have more problems in some ways. Having attended elite schools myself, plenty of my classmates were screwed up. I'm not sure what her education has to do with this discussion though.

It is a reference to the idea that because Bethenny came from wealthy parents who paid for her to go to prestigious schools, her childhood couldn't have been that bad.

[QuinnM]

The comment was made that Bethenny did not want to go to Jason's parents home because she wanted time for just the 3 of them. There was always someone with them, be it camera crew, he SG employees or the nanny so IMO, that argument does not make sense. Oh, and people pay big bucks to stay in vacation homes in the woods/mountains of PA. LOL

Got it. No they did not have 24/7 nannies. They had one 40 hour a week nanny once the baby nurse moved on. The baby nurse was 24/7 but that's the baby nurse thing. And this is not a vacation home. This is a ranch in a small town with the in laws. They were talking about dong this forever or until Brynn was old enough to just spend the summer there and B could pick her up in September. So I'm on B's side.

[LotusFlower]

I don't know that a four year old interprets mommy wearing my clothes as 'I should stay skinny because skinny is all that matters'...I think four year old thinks 'mommy is being funny!'

Just wait. Next year she'll be five. Then ten. Then thirteen. I think that's why the picture caused such an uproar. Because a lot of women/mothers with young daughters saw the picture and the message it delivers, and were horrified. For Bryn, at this age, the picture isn't bad, but it certainly portends a difficult puberty, just for starters. For everyone else, including Bethenny's fans/followers, especially women, the messages were societal, for lack of a better word.

[Celia Rubenstein]

I don't know that a four year old interprets mommy wearing my clothes as 'I should stay skinny because skinny is all that matters'...I think four year old thinks 'mommy is being funny!'

 

That was my take on it, too.  

 

I personally think one day when Bryn googles all this (as people seem so concerned about her doing) what will disturb her is not any hidden message in that picture, but rather the backlash her mother faced for their innocent dress up game knowing it was her (sweet! cute! innocent!) idea.  The overblown response to this from rags like Huff Po will hurt her more than that picture ever could.

 

Well, good thing she will have rich parents that will pay for her to go to prestigious schools. So all will be fine.

 

I see what you did there, Shoegal, lmao! Touche!

Edited May 28, 2015 by Celia Rubenstein

[Celia Rubenstein]

Oh, and people pay big bucks to stay in vacation homes in the woods/mountains of PA. LOL

 

The Hoppy house did not look any kind of vacation destination home to me.  More typical middle-class, slightly crowded suburban house.  "No where" Pennsylvania seems like an appropriate way to describe it to me. 

 

She'll probably feel the same way about the way some people talk about her grandparents.

 

 

If she looks back at tapes of the show, I think she will know why people said what they did about the Hoppys.  And Jason, too, for that matter. But the press accusing her mom of pressuring her to be skinny with that instagram picture and attacking her mom for it is another matter.  She was there when the picture was taken and knows better. JMHO.   

Edited May 28, 2015 by Celia Rubenstein

[zoeysmom]

Got it. No they did not have 24/7 nannies. They had one 40 hour a week nanny once the baby nurse moved on. The baby nurse was 24/7 but that's the baby nurse thing. And this is not a vacation home. This is a ranch in a small town with the in laws. They were talking about dong this forever or until Brynn was old enough to just spend the summer there and B could pick her up in September. So I'm on B's side.

I kind of put that in -what a nice offer but Bryn will have plenty to do during the summer how about a week with you?  Bethenny was the executive producer so I am sure she put out what was most beneficial to her side.  I don't think anyone, including the Hoppys, expected the kid to be with them exclusively for the summer.

 

A forty hour a week nanny is pretty nice-they also seemed to drag nannies on their vacations.  I don't have a problem with that it is nice to have a designated agent for child care in case the parents want a night out.

 

I could be wrong but I think the Hoppys sold off their Hazelton property when they retired.

[LotusFlower]

 

 If she looks back at tapes of the show, I think she will know why people said what they did about the Hoppys.  And Jason, too, for that matter. But the press accusing her mom of pressuring her to be skinny with that instagram picture and attacking her mom for it is another matter.  She was there when the picture was taken and knows better. JMHO.

That's her father and her grandparents. If you think she'll be biased in her mother's favor, which I agree, then the same goes for the other side of her family. She loves them, so she'll be equally hurt to see them cast in a bad light in the same way that she loves her mother and is protective of her and her reputation.

[LotusFlower]

Is it just me, or does it seem like people do not want this child to have a good relationship with her father and grandparents? I really don't understand. Does that mean Beth "wins"? I just can't believe that is a good outcome for Bryn, regardless of how you feel about Beth or Jason. It's pretty fucked up to wish for a child to have to cope with parental alienation.

Welcome to the world of divorce. There are good divorces, and bad ones. This is a bad one. "War of the Roses" bad.

[WireWrap]

Is it just me, or does it seem like people do not want this child to have a good relationship with her father and grandparents? I really don't understand. Does that mean Beth "wins"? I just can't believe that is a good outcome for Bryn, regardless of how you feel about Beth or Jason. It's pretty fucked up to wish for a child to have to cope with parental alienation.

IMO, some really believe that Jason marked, then plotted, the pressured Bethenny into marriage, I suspect that some think he got her pregnant on purpose, and that he married her with the intent of divorcing her for a big fat payday settlement! Oh, and some believe that the only reason Jason wanted joint custody of Bryn was so that he would receive child support from Bethenny for the next 14 or so years. Talk about cold. JMO

[LotusFlower]

I dunno, it seems like the members of the calvary have a bit too much bloodlust in this instance.

Yea, I agree. But I think they're in the worst of it right now. Believe it or not, I think things will be better down the road for all of them. This isn't Teresa and Joe Giudice we're talking about. I think they're in fight mode right now, but it has to end sometime, right? I think they can probably get to a place where everyone is civil. Just not yet.

[sleekandchic]

Is it just me, or does it seem like people do not want this child to have a good relationship with her father and grandparents? I really don't understand. Does that mean Beth "wins"? I just can't believe that is a good outcome for Bryn, regardless of how you feel about Beth or Jason. It's pretty fucked up to wish for a child to have to cope with parental alienation.

It's not just you.

Bryn's best interests are not a priority.

I dunno, it seems like the members of the calvary have a bit too much bloodlust in this instance.

It's so obvious to me, too.

[shoegal]

Is it just me, or does it seem like people do not want this child to have a good relationship with her father and grandparents? I really don't understand. Does that mean Beth "wins"? I just can't believe that is a good outcome for Bryn, regardless of how you feel about Beth or Jason. It's pretty fucked up to wish for a child to have to cope with parental alienation.

I don't believe that anyone wants Bryn isolated from her father or grandparents. This seems to be taking things a little too seriously.

Bloodlust? Seriously???

[shoegal]

Go back a few pages and look at the way Bryn's grandparents are characterized.

And Bethenny, Bryn's mother, is ripped to shreds here on the daily. It's not personal.

[shoegal]

She's a reality star and public persona. Bryn's grandparents are not. I don't see Beth being ripped apart here. This isn't a fan site, and previously.tv is taking up the mantle of TWOP so people are critical sometimes. If you're offended by this thread, then don't look at the episode-specific ones.

Bryn's grandparents signed a Bravo release and hopped in the reality show train, so they are fair game IMO. I am not offended by this thread, like I said, it's not personal.

[WireWrap]

And Bethenny, Bryn's mother, is ripped to shreds here on the daily. It's not personal.

The Hoppy's have never said 1 word against Bethenny, they have kept out of the press. Their appearance on Bethenny's show was long ago and they never had a say about what was filmed or how it was presented. As EP, Bethenny did have a say on how the Hoppy's/Jason were seen/shown/portrayed on her show.

[maggiemae]

All I can think is Brynn is already living the life of an abused child. Can she really be with her mother and not hear the bitterness to friends, staff, lawyers on the phone?

 

Yet Bethenny won't settle, will drag this on, promote it on tv and other social media for attention. And most likely still remain VERY wealthy despite her bad choice and quick pregnancy with Jason. 

 

And not one of that family of 3 can get along with their lives - and move on as so many do - still close to their children and well being after a divorce.

Edited May 28, 2015 by maggiemae

[hottesthw]

I don't personally identify with Bethenny at all. I just go by what I have seen on screen when it comes to Jason's behavior. And it looks to me like is not above mind-fucking his wife to advance his personal agenda. He seems like the kind of guy who is totally capable of putting his interests above those of his daughter. He would have moved out of the apartment and not turned Bryn's home into a pressure cooker if he was that concerned with her well-being, for example. But he wants that apartment, so he stayed planted. Even though it must have been hell for Bryn to live like that.

I don't understand why it is okay to assume they made arrangements for their elder care when we never saw it, but it is wrong to assume they never told Jason to lighten up on the visit issue just because we never saw it.

I don't think asking your husband to not set up visits with the in-laws every weekend is asking him to turn his back on his parents. I think Bethenny just wanted a more reasonable schedule.

The only mind-fucker we've seen on tv is Bethenny IMO. She wants a boyfriend, she wants a husband, she wants a normal family, she wants a child. She gets all of that and now her husband manipulated her, his family smothered her, etc etc. Maybe those people were just trying to give the bitch what she had been crying about wanting for season after season.

And believe it or not there are families out there where the brand new, first time grandparents expect to see their new grand baby as often as possible. They want to spend every holiday they can with them. They want to visit on the weekends. And it's not all that horrible. I've got no dead siblings for my parents to use as a guilt trip but boy, did they enjoy the heck out of the new edition to their family. And after the first month or so the excitement dies down, people settle back into routines, and they are happy with the few times a month they see the baby now. And when it came to holidays and who went where, after a few adult, respectful conversations (something B might wanna try out one day) they realized we'd be doing our own thing AS WELL AS spending time with them. Watching Jason with his parents reminded me alot of my own and I found it cute to see. Cant wait to inform them how disturbed they really are in the eyes of so many. Only Bethenny could twist and destroy the joy that a new baby brings to so many people.

[hottesthw]

Yea, I agree. But I think they're in the worst of it right now. Believe it or not, I think things will be better down the road for all of them. This isn't Teresa and Joe Giudice we're talking about. I think they're in fight mode right now, but it has to end sometime, right? I think they can probably get to a place where everyone is civil. Just not yet.

Well let's see, it's been 20+years and Bethenny is still on tv trashing her mother....

Bethenny lives in fight mode based on what I've seen. She enjoys it.

Edited May 28, 2015 by hottesthw

[hottesthw]

I think this is the issue, you and your husband come from similar backgrounds and had similar views on extended family. My husband and I are the same (our motto: Family is great, as long as they live in another state!). Everyone has different ideas about how they want family involved, even from "normal" loving families (even within the same family, hubby and I both have siblings that live close to our parents and see them daily/ weekly). The problem is that Jason and Bethenny come at this from different worlds, which Bethenny seemed to try to explain and try to compromise and Jason dug in and berated her for not being "normal". I think he LOVED the fact that she "doesn't come from family" and he got to monopolize family time.

Think of it this way, let's say you are unhappy with your weight. You complain to your husband that you look fat in things or you need to lose weight or work out more or whatever. Instead of your husband answering with the accepted 'you are beautiful to me' or whatever placating response, he answers by saying, 'yeah, you are fat, you need to lose weight' and then constantly reminding you of how fat you are....but you said it first!

.

Except in reality, after staying you want to lose weight a million fucking times, and having your spouse tell you you're beautiful a million fucking times, and you in turn argue with him that no, I need to lose weight a million fucking times, eventually your spouse is just gonna agree with you and say ok, so when do you wanna hit the gym?

Most people can only be pushed so far. Bethenny is the type who can certainly give quite a shove but doesn't handle being bumped back very well.

[shoegal]

The Hoppy's have never said 1 word against Bethenny, they have kept out of the press. Their appearance on Bethenny's show was long ago and they never had a say about what was filmed or how it was presented. As EP, Bethenny did have a say on how the Hoppy's/Jason were seen/shown/portrayed on her show.

They had a say as to whether they participated on the show, so what they did and said while on Bravo is fair game. At least IMO.

Except in reality, after staying you want to lose weight a million fucking times, and having your spouse tell you you're beautiful a million fucking times, and you in turn argue with him that no, I need to lose weight a million fucking times, eventually your spouse is just gonna agree with you and say ok, so when do you wanna hit the gym?

Most people can only be pushed so far. Bethenny is the type who can certainly give quite a shove but doesn't handle being bumped back very well.

Well, then Jason I guess had a really short fucking fuse, how long were they together before he hit the wall, less than a year? Further evidence IMO that he never actually liked her.

[trimthatfat]

I personally thought Jason's parents were fine, polite people. I never got the impression that they wanted to smother Bethenny. She's complained for years about being raised by wolves and not knowing what it means to have a loving relationship with her parents, and I think Jason's parents tried to be there for her. I remember an episode of Bethenny's show where she went to meet Jason's friends in his hometown and one friend in particular said something about how she is one of them, how she is now important to them just like Jason is important to them. It was very, very sweet. So basically, I think his parents and friends meant well. I don't think the parents were wrong when they thought they'd be able to spend holidays with Bryn - most grandparents do. I also find the narrative that they are desperately clinging to Jason and his daughter due to their deceased son quite offensive. Maybe they just love their son and granddaughter? Maybe they recognize that they're aging and it won't always be as easy as it is now to see family? No...it can't possibly be that simple.

 

Honestly, Bethenny just isn't a happy person. She wanted a family and she got it, but it still wasn't enough. She complained about being broke, but is now unbelievably rich, and she still isn't happy. That's just who she is.

[zoeysmom]

They had a say as to whether they participated on the show, so what they did and said while on Bravo is fair game. At least IMO.

Well, then Jason I guess had a really short fucking fuse, how long were they together before he hit the wall, less than a year? Further evidence IMO that he never actually liked her.

They had been together over a year when the show started filming.  IIRC it was Bethenny who lost it early on over Jason watching basketball instead of planning the wedding that she had hired a wedding planner for and used and abused and got bitten by Cookie the dog. 

[Bossa Nova]

Don't recall if this was ever brought up on this thread about Bethenney...but does anyone know what ever happened to Bethenny's boyfriend Jason 1.0 ?

 

I know he was divorced and a father of three when he dated Beth. Plus I recall reading that he was later fired from his financial firm shortly after Real Housewives' New York season one due to his appearance on the show having supposedly violated a term of his employment (TV appearances?) I think he was suing.

 

But other than that, ...what ever happened to him? Did he re-marry? 

Edited May 28, 2015 by Bossa Nova

[WireWrap]

They had a say as to whether they participated on the show, so what they did and said while on Bravo is fair game. At least IMO.

Well, then Jason I guess had a really short fucking fuse, how long were they together before he hit the wall, less than a year? Further evidence IMO that he never actually liked her.

Yes, they agreed to be on a show for their DIL/son, her show A show where she was EP and had a say on the finished product, where she got to have a say on how others were portrayed, on how their conversations were cut/shortened for her narrative. HER = Bethenny

[shoegal]

Yes, they agreed to be on a show for their DIL/son, her show A show where she was EP and had a say on the finished product, where she got to have a say on how others were portrayed, on how their conversations were cut/shortened for her narrative. HER = Bethenny

...and? Still doesn't mean they aren't fair game.

I don't see Bethenny listed as an EP on her show.

Executive producer(s)

Jennifer O'Connell

Matt Anderson

Nick Emmerson

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bethenny_Ever_After...

Edited May 28, 2015 by shoegal

[WireWrap]

...and? Still doesn't mean they aren't fair game.

No. These are not the fame seekers that the HWs are. IMO, these are just 2 older parents doing something to help their son/DIL on her show an were repaid with cruelty by their DIL and her fans.

[shoegal]

No. These are not the fame seekers that the HWs are. IMO, these are just 2 older parents doing something to help their son/DIL on her show an were repaid with cruelty by their DIL and her fans.

Am I supposed to be shamed by your not so subtle dig?

[WireWrap]

Am I supposed to be shamed by your not so subtle dig?

No, I am not trying to shame anyone, I just stated a fact.