S02.E15: TLC: Tunde's Loving Care

[jewel21]

Quote

As Abishola begins studying for medical school, she offends Gloria with an insensitive comment about Gloria's own journey of almost becoming a doctor. Also, Tunde schools a reluctant Bob on the art of home repair while helping to fix his dishwasher.

Airdate: 04/26/2021

[jewel21]

I really felt for Gloria, and while I loved seeing the flashback of her over the years, it made me sad that she never got the opportunity to be a doctor after all her hard work. I really enjoyed this episode and all the storylines, including Tunde's. 

[Yeah No]

Abishola is ridiculous.  Are we supposed to laugh off her insensitivity because Bob finds her "cute"?  I mean really, there is no excuse for her behavior with Gloria.  I am so glad Gloria gave it back to her, but still pissed off that Abishola can't even manage a decent apology.

Gloria would have had to be a trailblazer to have become a female doctor back then.  I kind of identified a little bit with her situation because I too studied for a career but ended up not pursuing it because of life circumstances and lack of opportunity.  And that wasn't even my first choice of a career - that one I would have had to be a trailblazer to pursue and I wasn't cut out to be a trailblazer.  Knowing the obstacles she would likely face, not to mention the racism and sexism I hate to say that she may have made the better choice for her just for avoiding the aggravation - sad though that is to say.  Younger people may not realize just how difficult it would have been for a black woman to pursue a career as a doctor back then.  It's even bad today.  This article is related to that.

Interestingly I just happened to see the actress that plays Gloria on an old episode of "2 and a Half Men" from about 10 years ago and ironically she was playing a nurse.  She seems to have made a career out of playing a nurse.   She has played one on "General Hospital" and I recognized her from "Big Bang Theory" too.  She is an excellent actress.  Although I have only seen her in comedies it looks like she is good at drama too.

Oh and I have that top that Abishola's aunt was wearing in this episode.  It's from Macy's LOL.  

[possibilities]

I hate it that Abishola was only sorry because Gloria was practically a superhero for what she went through. Even if Gloria hadn't been THE BEST and totally transcended multiple crushing obstacles, there is no excuse for Abishola's attitude. I usually like Abishola, but she really does need to stop being smug and insulting and rude as hell to her co-workers.

I wish someone had taught me to fix things. I've tried really hard to learn, and sometimes I've succeeded (I fixed my washing machine-- booyah!), but it would have been so great to have been raised with someone showing me. 

[shapeshifter]

7 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Interestingly I just happened to see the actress that plays Gloria on an old episode of "2 and a Half Men" from about 10 years ago and ironically she was playing a nurse.  She seems to have made a career out of playing a nurse.   She has played one on "General Hospital" and I recognized her from "Big Bang Theory" too.  She is an excellent actress.  Although I have only seen her in comedies it looks like she is good at drama too.

Dammit, Vernee Watson-Johnson (Gloria), you're not supposed to make me cry!

 

I've never been able to laugh at someone slipping on a banana peel, so Bob slipping on the wet floor like that just made me think of how, IRL, a man of his size falling like that would break his neck and die. I actually did expect to see him in the hospital as a patient in the next scene telling Abishola something about it being (or not being) so romantic to be back at the place where they first met.
I still want Abishola to sing again!

 

6 hours ago, possibilities said:

I usually like Abishola, but she really does need to stop being smug and insulting and rude as hell to her co-workers.

Let's hope the writers will use this episode as a pivot point for her character, and that in the future, although she will still say insulting things out of habit, she will also now follow-up with something like an apology --which, if written adeptly, could be funny.

[AnimeMania]

The Tunde stuff really bothered me. It would have been fine before we find out that he is great "Real Estate Mogul", but now that I know he has more important things he could and should be doing, how can he waste so much time teaching Bob life lessons that are BS. People who are busy, delegate and your time is money, you can spend all day fixing something or you can pay someone else to do it while you are out making "Chedda". For somebody who has so many irons in the fire, Tunde's lifestyle shouldn't be as "chill" as he portrays it is.

[tennisgurl]

I could really use some lessons on machine repair from Tunde, whenever my dishwasher breaks I end up just messing with it endlessly while it just sits there judging me until I call someone for help or find a really helpful YouTube video. It was sweet of Bob to come up with ways to give Tunde things to do so that he doesn't feel like he's losing his usefulness. 

I thought that Bob would end up in the hospital after his fall. That was a pretty bad spill for a guy with his history of health problems. Abishola has really loosened up since we first met her, but she was really crappy to Gloria, I am glad that she realized that what she said was wrong, but I also kind of wish that Abishola would admit that sometimes things just don't work out and its just not some kind of moral failing. Its sad that Gloria never made it as a doctor due to external circumstances, but she seems to have a pretty good outlook on why it wasn't all a waste. 

[shapeshifter]

20 minutes ago, AnimeMania said:

The Tunde stuff really bothered me. It would have been fine before we find out that he is great "Real Estate Mogul", but now that I know he has more important things he could and should be doing, how can he waste so much time teaching Bob life lessons that are BS. People who are busy, delegate and your time is money, you can spend all day fixing something or you can pay someone else to do it while you are out making "Chedda". For somebody who has so many irons in the fire, Tunde's lifestyle shouldn't be as "chill" as he portrays it is.

As Penny was to The Big Bang Theory, so is Tunde becoming to Bob Hearts Abishola.
Kind of an all-purpose, almost-main character. 
Sometimes she was smart; sometimes she was dumb.
Sometimes she was a drunk; sometimes she was responsible. 
Sometimes she was a mean girl; sometimes she was compassionate. 
So Tunde can be a "jack of all trades, master of none," as well as a master of some.

 

[Browncoat]

Bob was a little sexist in this episode.  It didn't bother him that Tunde could fix the dishwasher, but it did when Olu said she could?  Bad Bob -- he's usually so good about being around strong women.

Abishola was a crap friend to Gloria.  I don't blame Gloria one bit for switching tables at lunch.  Her story was a nice little life lesson in how far we've come in such a short time, and how far we really still need to go.  It really hasn't been that long ago that the presence of women in general was discouraged from med school and law school, much less women of color.

[chediavolo]

What does Bob see in Abishola?! She treats people like shit & we are supposed to believe it is a cultural thing? 
she just leaves Bobs house without a goodbye or a note? No excusesAbishola, you are self centered & care little about others feelings/ lives. She’s cold & mean. 
True, a man of Bobs size slipping on a wet floor like that would end up in the hospital.  

[Janie430]

20 hours ago, Browncoat said:

Bob was a little sexist in this episode.  It didn't bother him that Tunde could fix the dishwasher, but it did when Olu said she could?  Bad Bob -- he's usually so good about being around strong women.

I don't think it was about being sexist - Olu basically said "Real men know how to fix a dishwasher."  I think he was getting annoyed at both Olu and Tunde for trying to relate his worth as a person/man to his handyman skills.

[Browncoat]

I heard Olu say "anyone", not "real men", implying that even she could fix a dishwasher, which got Bob's knickers a little twisted.

[shapeshifter]

Just now, Browncoat said:

I heard Olu say "anyone", not "real men", implying that even she could fix a dishwasher, which got Bob's knickers a little twisted.

--which probably made Bob realize that not only was he not a "real man" by the standards of his future in-laws (which he might have mentally brushed off a macho nonsense), but he wasn't even "anyone," that is, he was inadequate as a husband for Abishola and a stepdad for Dele in the eyes of those who he thought he had a good relationship and who he thought valued him.

But this whole episode was all about traversing this kind of mindset.

For what it's worth, when I was a young teen girl and my father was taking apart the trap under the bathroom sink to retrieve something that went down the drain, he told me to pay attention because I would need to know how to do it someday (I do not). He was the first of his family born in this country. They were refugees in the early 20th century from Russia, fleeing because they were educated, "capitalist" land owners, but arriving in the US with nothing -- so very much like Tunde and Olu and Abishola. None of the inconsistencies or offensive remarks made by Abishola and her family seem foreign to me, even though my family would share no culture or traceable ancestry with hers.  Actually, Abishola showed much more sympathy for Gloria than my mother would have after learning a similar story, perhaps because Abishola is confident and comfortable enough to not feel the need to only associate with those who are at or above her class. IDK. Maybe Abishola is at heart as insecure as my parents. 

 

[Winston Wolfe]

10 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

10 hours ago, Browncoat said:

I heard Olu say "anyone", not "real men", implying that even she could fix a dishwasher, which got Bob's knickers a little twisted.

--which probably made Bob realize that not only was he not a "real man" by the standards of his future in-laws (which he might have mentally brushed off a macho nonsense), but he wasn't even "anyone," that is, he was inadequate as a husband for Abishola and a stepdad for Dele in the eyes of those who he thought he had a good relationship and who he thought valued him.

All of these ideas implied by the show bother me. I'm marginally handy, but can't fix a dish washer either. They're fairly complicated machines - mine even connects to an iPhone app. But while I can't fix a dish washer, there are other things I can do, like help design new schools, mentor young people, and make a earnest effort to be a decent guy. Hopefully those things qualify me as a "real man," if not I'm sunk. While there are things about Abishola's culture that are admirable, the antiquated gender values aren't one of them.

Edited April 29, 2021 by Winston Wolfe

[shapeshifter]

15 minutes ago, Winston Wolfe said:

While there are things about Abishola's culture that are admirable, the antiquated gender values aren't one of them.

I neglected to point out above that Olu's claim that she can fix a dishwasher (as well as Abishola's decision to be a doctor) both negate Tunde's speeches to Bob about manly activities. 

And I think Tunde was really just messing with Bob. 
We never saw the dishwasher get fixed, did we? 

And Bob never suggested calling a dishwasher repair person. He was going to call a "guy."

But then I'm not sure what the last bit was about with the sabotaged equipment for Tunde to fix.
Was Bob just messing with Tunde?

[Gbb]

30 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

But then I'm not sure what the last bit was about with the sabotaged equipment for Tunde to fix.
Was Bob just messing with Tunde?

He wanted Tunde to feel useful, so he gave him something to fix and people to mentor. 

[shapeshifter]

29 minutes ago, Gbb said:

He wanted Tunde to feel useful, so he gave him something to fix and people to mentor. 

That was my understanding too, but I thought it might be the other as well.

I guess it also got Tunde out of Bob’s kitchen so he could call “a guy,” heh.

My landlady hired 2 handymen acquaintances to fix the ceiling fan in my apartment. It took them 8 hours to figure out they couldn’t fix it and then to buy a new one and install it. When I moved out, they still hadn’t figured out the light fixtures in the bathroom. 

[femmefan1946]

I was confused by the nurses in this episode.

Gloria and Abishola are floor nurses. Why were they scrubbed in as operating room nurses? That's a very different specialty.

And when Gloria could not become a doctor, didn't she have to retrain to become a nurse? Again, that is a very different specialty.

Nursing is not less than doctoring. It's different.

 

[possibilities]

My guess is that Gloria did have to retrain for nursing. But nursing has always been more willing to accept women and people of color into the profession, so she was able to get hired in a way that she couldn't as a doctor.

I have no idea why Abishola and Gloria were in surgery. That confused me, too. I think it is probably just the tv nonsense of all medical professionals covering every specialty, like how a lot of shows have surgeons who are as likely to do open heart surgery as they are to do a bowel resection or work traumas in the ER or operate on someone's brain for whatever random reason. TV doesn't seem to care about making much sense in that regard.

Edited May 13, 2021 by possibilities

[callie lee 29]

On 5/13/2021 at 3:09 AM, possibilities said:

My guess is that Gloria did have to retrain for nursing. But nursing has always been more willing to accept women and people of color into the profession, so she was able to get hired in a way that she couldn't as a doctor.

I have no idea why Abishola and Gloria were in surgery. That confused me, too. I think it is probably just the tv nonsense of all medical professionals covering every specialty, like how a lot of shows have surgeons who are as likely to do open heart surgery as they are to do a bowel resection or work traumas in the ER or operate on someone's brain for whatever random reason. TV doesn't seem to care about making much sense in that regard.

Yeah, this. I can't think of one TV show or movie that understands that nurses aren't interchangeable.

[Katy M]

On 4/27/2021 at 2:55 AM, possibilities said:

I hate it that Abishola was only sorry because Gloria was practically a superhero for what she went through. Even if Gloria hadn't been THE BEST and totally transcended multiple crushing obstacles, there is no excuse for Abishola's attitude. I usually like Abishola, but she really does need to stop being smug and insulting and rude as hell to her co-workers.

I wish someone had taught me to fix things. I've tried really hard to learn, and sometimes I've succeeded (I fixed my washing machine-- booyah!), but it would have been so great to have been raised with someone showing me. 

Gloria should have come back and said something like, "if you're so great why are you so old and you haven't even started med school yet?"  I mean it would have been equally rude, but well-deserved.  Never judge other people. You have no idea what or why things happen.

[Kimmmmmm]

I still don't know WHY Bob hearts Abishola.