S02.E07: The Wrong Adebambo

[jewel21]

Quote

When Abishola's husband makes a surprise visit from Nigeria to Detroit, Bob sees this as a perfect opportunity for Abishola to ask for a divorce, but Abishola is surprised when past feelings for her husband come up.

Airdate: 01/18/2021

[floridamom]

Well, just as predicted, the  husband shows up. The writers could have given Abishola a different circumstance. This plot line has been so overdone over the years; we predicted it from the beginning. 

[jewel21]

Help, my episode cut off. 

The husband says he and Dele are going to the park to play chess and how they're a family again. And my PVR cut off before Abishola answered. What happened?!

[hula-la]

1 hour ago, jewel21 said:

Help, my episode cut off. 

The husband says he and Dele are going to the park to play chess and how they're a family again. And my PVR cut off before Abishola answered. What happened?!

Abishola told him she wanted a divorce and he told her that he would never give her a divorce. For any Canadians, he’s the actor who played BLT on Degrassi. I saw him on another program this week, so I got double my BLT sightings!

[Yeah No]

3 hours ago, hula-la said:

Abishola told him she wanted a divorce and he told her that he would never give her a divorce.

Why do I get the feeling that they'll milk this for all it's worth and then at some point in the future either uncle Tunde will get him to give her one or he'll die in an unfortunate accident?

[NoReally]

Well, we knew this story line was coming. I hate it. But we might as well get it over with.

[Harvey]

The scenes with just Bob and Abishola on their bench continue to be charming. I wish we got more of them.

[Keywestclubkid]

Is abishola an American citizen? couldn't she file for an abandonment divorce?

[floridamom]

Yes, Abishola said that she wanted a divorce but she says everything with a total lack of emotion. She said those words to her husband seemingly half-heartedly IMO. They need to give this character a personality. I'm tired of looking at a sad sack face on the screen. Bob, unfortunately is still doing cart wheels for her. He needs to man up and dump her. This engagement is so hard to believe as we saw no relationship between them, mature individual-like or not, develop on screen. Suddenly, after 2 dates, they were engaged. How did this happen? Logically, whatever follows continues to be unbelievable.

[jewel21]

I don't mind this story line because it's creating some drama between Bob and Abishola. I continue to adore Tunde and Olu. Also, it was interesting to see Adebambo bend down and touch the ground when greeting Tunde and Olu. I'm assuming it's a sign of respect and found it fascinating. 

[DoYouLikeMutton]

I agree with everyone one else here, Bob continues to jump through burning hoops with Abishola nary cracking a smile.  But, finally something is happening with this show to move it along, and we are seeing it (unlike the mystery of how Bob & Abishola’s relationship went from zero to an engagement in only a couple of lackluster dates!).  I have a different take on the premise of having Abishola’s husband come to Detroit.  Abishola stood up to him using the exact words Bob had said to her.  For the first time, it seems she does listen to Bob and has some regard for his ideas, feelings and worth in the relationship.  To me, that was a breakthrough moment in the relationship between Bob and Abishola.

[Debbiejo]

On 1/19/2021 at 2:20 PM, floridamom said:

This engagement is so hard to believe as we saw no relationship between them, mature individual-like or not, develop on screen. Suddenly, after 2 dates, they were engaged. How did this happen? Logically, whatever follows continues to be unbelievable.

I find no chemistry whatsoever between them. The little things that make up a relationship are totally missing from the scripts......no sweetness or warmth or cuteness between them. Bob has some normalcy, but Abishola is monotoned and emotionless and humorless. No warmth with her son either, who I like.  

[SmithW6079]

On 1/20/2021 at 8:03 AM, DoYouLikeMutton said:

 I have a different take on the premise of having Abishola’s husband come to Detroit.  Abishola stood up to him using the exact words Bob had said to her.  For the first time, it seems she does listen to Bob and has some regard for his ideas, feelings and worth in the relationship.  To me, that was a breakthrough moment in the relationship between Bob and Abishola.

I noticed that too. Personally, I like Abishola. I think she has a very dry wit (so that if you blink, you'll miss it), and she's very reserved, which may be a function of having to make a life for her son. Are her aunt and uncle relatively recent immigrants or have they been in the US for a long time? Did they ever say what Tunde or Olu did? Regardless, I'm sure Abishola's a major contributor to their household income. Even if, as her husband said, it was her decision to stay in America instead of returning to Nigeria with him, he still took another wife, so no wonder she's closed off emotionally.

[doodlebug]

Quote

Regardless, I'm sure Abishola's a major contributor to their household income. Even if, as her husband said, it was her decision to stay in America instead of returning to Nigeria with him, he still took another wife, so no wonder she's closed off emotionally.

I can see that.  I've never been to Nigeria, but I've been to Kenya where men take more than one wife fairly often.  I spoke with several women who were the first and only wife for a number of years and, then, their husband took a second wife.  In most cases, the second wife was younger and more willing and able to have children.  All of the women I spoke to were deeply hurt when their husbands did this, they thought that they would be the one and only wife and they were very wounded when their husband didn't take their feelings into consideration.  And, these are women who stayed in the marriage and didn't emigrate.  One woman needed a hysterectomy (I'm a gyn) and she was worried that, if she had it, her husband would spend even more time with the new wife, since it was certain she'd never have more kids.  She already had 3 or 4 children and was about 40 years old; new wife was around 25, no kids yet.  BTW, she had a college education, a good job and was fluent in English.  And, yet, much of her self esteem was tied up in being her husband's only wife.

I can see Abishola being devastated by his decision to marry another woman.  Also, perhaps she realized that at least part of the reason he wanted to return was in order to marry a second wife since that wasn't happening in the US.

Edited January 25, 2021 by doodlebug

[shapeshifter]

5 hours ago, doodlebug said:

I can see that.  I've never been to Nigeria, but I've been to Kenya where men take more than one wife fairly often.  I spoke with several women who were the first and only wife for a number of years and, then, their husband took a second wife.  In most cases, the second wife was younger and more willing and able to have children.  All of the women I spoke to were deeply hurt when their husbands did this, they thought that they would be the one and only wife and they were very wounded when their husband didn't take their feelings into consideration.  And, these are women who stayed in the marriage and didn't emigrate.  One woman needed a hysterectomy (I'm a gyn) and she was worried that, if she had it, her husband would spend even more time with the new wife, since it was certain she'd never have more kids.  She already had 3 or 4 children and was about 40 years old; new wife was around 25, no kids yet.  BTW, she had a college education, a good job and was fluent in English.  And, yet, much of her self esteem was tied up in being her husband's only wife.

I can see Abishola being devastated by his decision to marry another woman.  Also, perhaps she realized that at least part of the reason he wanted to return was in order to marry a second wife since that wasn't happening in the US.

This kind of begs the question of why Adebambo would want Abishola back.*
Isn’t she about 40? I wonder if we will get a reveal that wife #2 can’t have children. 
 

*Not that I don’t think Abishola is attractive, intelligent, and has a wry sense of humor that many men would find attractive. 
Plus her siren-like singing voice that has been retconned away since the first episode. 

[possibilities]

He seems like a total dick to me, regardless of his number of wives. I could see Abishola not wanting to be stuck with a guy who regards her as property rather than as an independent and competent equal. 

[shapeshifter]

3 minutes ago, possibilities said:

He seems like a total dick to me, regardless of his number of wives. I could see Abishola not wanting to be stuck with a guy who regards her as property rather than as an independent and competent equal. 

Yes. Also, this is an example of 2 people who have grown apart. 
In my head-story, when Abishola was young she was able to overlook Adebambo's dickishness, and probably was physically attracted to him.

Edited January 26, 2021 by shapeshifter

[AnimeMania]

1 hour ago, shapeshifter said:

This kind of begs the question of why Adebambo would want Abishola back.*
Isn’t she about 40? I wonder if we will get a reveal that wife #2 can’t have children. 

I don't know anything about the culture but it probably looks very bad when a husband can't keep his wife happy, especially since divorce seems to be frowned upon. Since everybody knows he is married to Abisohola, he can't pretend that he only has one wife.