S05.E09: The Tipping Point

[byrd]

On 10/1/2020 at 7:42 PM, ButterQueen said:

I think Chris is a family man and would find a way to help Monique with her anger.  She may have PPD.  Other than the game, I think he has always been very supportive and speaks softly when he disagrees.  I’d hate to see them divorce.

Chris won't leave his wife, he's very supportive and looks at her lovingly, he wants to help her. He is a great stand up father and husband. 

[byrd]

On 10/2/2020 at 4:19 PM, Rlb8031 said:

So, I'm going to start by saying that Monique was a fault for letting Candace take her there. Blackouts, too many sips of wine, stress, post-partum, none of it excuses what she did. Full stop.

However, Candace? That chick? She broke the first rule - Don't let your mouth write a check your ass can't cash. 

The fact is that there are some people for whom the sheer act of being disrespected is an ass-whopping level of offense. Typically, the more impoverished someone is, the more it is important that you don't allow people to "talk crazy" to you or disrespect you. And once that behavior is engrained, it is very difficult to unlearn it. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that despite Monique having all she ever wanted in life when it comes to material wealth, she still has a hard time shedding those early life lessons. 

And Candace, as a slick-mouthed, little wisp of a woman is completely responsible for reading the room and recognizing who is the lion at the watering hole and who is the gazelle. Candace mouth is neither small, weak or powerless, and her mistake was relying on Monique having grown up and changed. She said as much to Chris "I draw the line at putting hands on someone". But Candace didn't realize that Monique did not give not nary one goddamn about her line. 

I learned this lesson growing up and flip-flopping back and forth between my prep school, where the girls were quite comfortable calling each other sluts and bitches because someone looked at someone else's boyfriend and my neighborhood, where the same exact behavior might result in you being surrounded by a group of young ladies with Vaseline, no earrings, and a hidden razor blade, ready to lose their freedom just so long as you recognized that they weren't going to be disrespected like that. Candace didn't follow the law of self-preservation, reading the room to determine what is the possibility that this could go horribly wrong. That's exactly what Monique DID with Robyn, which is why she didn't end up laying hands on her. But I don't really have any sympathy for Candace because when you invite someone to drag you, and they actually do, it's completely foreseeable. You are relying on the kindness of others to save you from your own stupidity rather than thinking that your responsibility is to get out of the interaction in one piece. A slick mouth and quick comeback may work with Ashley or the Dean of Pledges, GIzelle. But it wasn't the way to go with Monique, and I'm going to need Candace to own that fact.  

 

On 10/2/2020 at 4:19 PM, Rlb8031 said:

So, I'm going to start by saying that Monique was a fault for letting Candace take her there. Blackouts, too many sips of wine, stress, post-partum, none of it excuses what she did. Full stop.

However, Candace? That chick? She broke the first rule - Don't let your mouth write a check your ass can't cash. 

The fact is that there are some people for whom the sheer act of being disrespected is an ass-whopping level of offense. Typically, the more impoverished someone is, the more it is important that you don't allow people to "talk crazy" to you or disrespect you. And once that behavior is engrained, it is very difficult to unlearn it. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that despite Monique having all she ever wanted in life when it comes to material wealth, she still has a hard time shedding those early life lessons. 

And Candace, as a slick-mouthed, little wisp of a woman is completely responsible for reading the room and recognizing who is the lion at the watering hole and who is the gazelle. Candace mouth is neither small, weak or powerless, and her mistake was relying on Monique having grown up and changed. She said as much to Chris "I draw the line at putting hands on someone". But Candace didn't realize that Monique did not give not nary one goddamn about her line. 

I learned this lesson growing up and flip-flopping back and forth between my prep school, where the girls were quite comfortable calling each other sluts and bitches because someone looked at someone else's boyfriend and my neighborhood, where the same exact behavior might result in you being surrounded by a group of young ladies with Vaseline, no earrings, and a hidden razor blade, ready to lose their freedom just so long as you recognized that they weren't going to be disrespected like that. Candace didn't follow the law of self-preservation, reading the room to determine what is the possibility that this could go horribly wrong. That's exactly what Monique DID with Robyn, which is why she didn't end up laying hands on her. But I don't really have any sympathy for Candace because when you invite someone to drag you, and they actually do, it's completely foreseeable. You are relying on the kindness of others to save you from your own stupidity rather than thinking that your responsibility is to get out of the interaction in one piece. A slick mouth and quick comeback may work with Ashley or the Dean of Pledges, GIzelle. But it wasn't the way to go with Monique, and I'm going to need Candace to own that fact.  

Thank you , Thank you for all of this !!!!!  I completely agree..

[Iguessnot]

2 hours ago, byrd said:

 

Thank you , Thank you for all of this !!!!!  I completely agree..

Funky Dineva has a very insightful video about this in response to the Sorry not sorry episode. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOuuc3FuIb0

[ladle]

Oops, wrong thread!

Edited October 19, 2020 by ladle

[RedHawk]

On 9/27/2020 at 11:12 PM, mbaywife123 said:

Messy women on a messy show with messy relationships with each other, spouses, kids, ex's ,ect.

At what point does the $$$ they are being paid for this shit show become not enough to further humiliate themselves and family members? Good Grief!!

Exactly, and ruin the show as well. I’ve been behind on this season and was kinda enjoying it until this ugly fight/assault. Now I know the rest of the season will focus on this crap and I’ll be doing a lot of fast-forwarding. All the debate over who’s at fault — I do not give one shit. It’s ugly, stupid, and boring. NOT entertaining, not what I tune in for. Going the way of all the other HoWife shows I stopped watching seasons ago. 

Edited October 24, 2020 by RedHawk

[J80134]

Monique was wrong, but damn I enjoyed the Candiass beatdown. You tell somebody to drag you, you gotta be prepared they'll take you up on it. 

Giz, please wake up and find your self esteem. 

Good time Mikey makes my skin crawl. He's the kind of guy that would get caught jerking off at a Disney movie.

Ray is over putting on the Ritz. He's a tired old man who just wants to chill in the warm weather of Florida and never have a big party again. I hope he finds a nice 70-year-old woman to do that with him. 

[byrd]

On 9/28/2020 at 9:19 AM, byrd said:

Do we even know at this point if Monique is still on the show ? I agree she needs some down time. I don't want Monique kicked off I like her a lot, but she's under too much stress for this right now.  I hope her tubes are tied or Chris is fixed because she does not need anymore kids .. 

I so agree, I believe she is done having babies , she is clearly stressed out.  

[Babsb]

Did Giselle actually say that she and Jamal have an image to protect? I actually laughed out loud at that one...yes, leave so you can protect your image...what a joke.